(h) TROM - 2.21 Family and Love

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Documentary´s description :
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TROM (The Reality of Me) represents the biggest documentary ever created, it is also the only one that tries to analyse everything : from science to the monetary system as well as real solutions to improve everyone's life.

A new and ´real´ way to see the world.

"Before the Big-Bang, till present, and beyond."
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Here's an idea that is regarded as a
normal one among human beings.

The family represents a horde,

the gathering of some animals
after a genetic sequence.

For most animal groups this is the
result of struggling for survival

or the animal need for mating.

For humans those reasons
are long past

and the family is formed
by the current culture.

Thus, normality is found in a family
with two parents plus children,

many parents plus children,

or just the two potential
parents without children.

Culture has changed
the idea of family,

and family is just an idea.

In such a group;

parents are those who raise their
children and take part in their education.

Parents should have a good
understanding of psychology,

environmental influence
on human behaviour

and some general knowledge
about the importance of genes.

Without this knowledge,

education of children is risky,
random and 'personal',

based solely on the ideas
of some individuals.

For most people
the family is a goal

and children a fulfillment,
all rendered by culture.

This creates certain problems.

For example the
issue of children.

Whether you are
a parent or not,

you ever wonder why
you want to have a baby?

What's the point?

Because you need to?

Because it is gentle?

Because you want to
play with him?

For personal fulfillment?

Most parents relive childhood
moments through their children

or want children to represent the
success that they have not acquired.

A kind of trophy.

I'm not saying it's wrong,
but you have to ask yourself,

why do you want
to have a baby?

[Jacque Fresco] - So women are given
a particular role in this culture.

When you give a baby dolls, or a girl,
you're already programming her.

When you tie a big bow in her hair,
you're programming her.

So women in the future will pick up
whatever the hell they want.

Electric trains... not
necessarily the babydolls.

Wiping the baby's ass is
not a real great career.

In other words, they're trying to get women
to believe in having children, you know?

Children are a pain in the ass!

They are not pleasant.

They can't say anything new.

They require a lot of your time.

You can't travel, you can't
do a lot of things...

So the population in the
future will be diminished.

Now, a lot of you believe
"Oh, I like to have my own children"

"I want my name going
into the future"

See?

Now, if you have a child,
say eleven years old,

and the hospital calls you, "We gave
you the wrong child eleven years ago."

You don't have to turn it in.

Don't you see that all children
are about the same?

They're all the same about
the same things.

My kids are the same
as any other kids,

they are just brought up with
a different value system.

No kids reflects you unless...

All that they inherit is the shape of the
ears, and the nose, and the head...

Similar, somewhat similar to you.

And the guys says
"That's a replica".

If the child misbehaves they say:
"He got that from your mother".

In the future, people when raise kids...
They are all the same...

If we try to visualize the future,

It is the same:
Families and all that...

So if I make movies about the future,
I have to use families in there.

There'll be no families, most
people won't own children,

but today, that's normal,
so you have to use that,

if you really want to
change people.

Otherwise, you'll come up and they'll say
"What the hell are you talking about?"

"I wouldn't wanna
live in your world!"

Your grandmother I told you,
if you took her to Miami Beach,

and she saw the girls with
their butts hanging out,

she'll say "They've gone too far".

Now, she is right where
she is coming from,

but not today.

But you got to understand your grandmother
was brought up in a different world.

So we teach the kids in school

that your parents,

your grandfather, were
brought up in different times

and their values are
different than ours.

Don't look them as BAD,

understand where they
are coming from,

that the Indian is not stupid,

all they do in their culture
is dance around a fire

because that's all they know,
that's all that they've been exposed to...

Now comes the next problem:

Overcrowding due to culture.

It is extremely dangerous,

because this system is
perpetuating the idea

that family is the goal
of every man's life,

and children are part of this idea.

[Peter Joseph] -For example, the Catholic
church, and a lot of other religions

that feed off of those early
old testament ideologies,

they advocate this illusion that
we can just procreate constantly,

and everyone's going to be fine.

God will take care
of everyone.

As of right now, with
the future of energy,

established energy,
the future of

the way we are orienting ourselves
on this planet through depletion,

I'm not having any children.

While I try to be as optimistic as possible
with The Zeitgeist Movement,

and what we could do, which is
phenomenal, what we could do.

As of right now, we have
some powerful barriers.

I'm not having children.
Why? Why would I say that?

First of all,
I wouldn't feel good.

I would feel utterly negligent and
irresponsible at this point in time,

to bring in another human being.

Most people when they
give birth to children, it's a

traditionalized self-serving,
established notion where,

"We are going to have
kids and a family".

To hell with the carrying
capacity of the Earth,

to hell with the fact that
we might be impoverished.

I mean, you see this in
trailer parks all the time.

I used to live in a trailer park. I've seen
this countless, countless times.

People don't have any
relationship to anything.

They have no education, as far
as what makes society work,

as far as what the processes
are that feed them.

So, they continue to have kids
over and over and over again,

or do many, many things that have
no relationship to anything.

But let's focus on
the children aspect.

For me to bring in a child,
is for me to actually say:

"I believe the world will
be in good shape

for the duration of
my child's life."

And then it becomes:

"What if my child has
a grand child?

Should the world have
the integrity

to maintain stability
for that child as well?

This is the question.

This is what all parents out there
should be asking themselves.

They shouldn't be having children
for their own self-serving needs

so they can have "a family"
and be traditional, and

show up at church and
have their two kids.

It has to relate to something real.

Humanity has to start thinking about
its relationship to the Earth.

Until it does so, we're
fucking doomed.

We have created a
economic structure,

a religious-philosophical
structure,

that is absolutely de-coupled
from anything tangible and real,

and these ideologies
are what will destroy

the human species and
destroy the planet.

- I enjoy working there, but there're
other things I wanna do!

- Like what?

- Well...

Eventually, I like to get married
and have kids.

I said "eventually", you
don't have to panic.

"We have talked about
naming our kids."

I just thought that was
somewhere off in the future...

and as much I hate to admit it,
all I kept thinking was:

"Drew, you'll never ever sleep
with another woman again... ever!"

[Jacque Fresco] - Love
is a biased word.

You yourself, and most people
in the radio audience,

have done things that
they are sorry for,

have done things
that they thought

were insufficient...
All of us!

So, sometimes you love yourself,
sometimes you don't,

sometimes you hate yourself!

So, if you marry somebody, sometimes
you love them very much,

sometimes a little less,

sometimes you are
disappointed in them...

So love is not is a fixed thing,
it's a fluctuating situation.

If you marry a girl that has
seven qualities that you like,

after you're married 5 years
you meet another girl

that has 27 qualities
that you like.

You can't help, but feel
for that person.

[Roxanne Meadows] -In the
future,

you'll probably love as many
people who are lovable

you'll share ideas and
values with many people

and you probably won't have
one person as a possession.

Today, a lot of people who are
married, that's their possession,

and if anything happens to them,
if they die, it's really...

terrible that's the only people that they share
their life, and their values and their work with.

[J.Fresco] - So you see,

all of our values, the way we look at the
world, we've learned that at a certain time,

and I'm saying that in the future

people will be very different
than we are today.

People will not use the word "Love",
they'll use the word "Extensionality".

I associate with the person
because they enhance my life,

they make my life easier,
we have a lot in common,

we understand each other
in many different areas,

and as the years go by we've increased
and improved our relationship.

That's what love
will really become.

today it's just a word, like
religion, is a verbal hobby.

On a radio broadcast Larry King once
asked me what I thought of Christianity,

and I said "It's a great idea, when are
they going to put it into practice?"

Well, you brought up
the word "emotion".

That's one of the major problems.

Korzybski called it
"Thalamic Behavior".

And behavior that was rational,
he called "Cortical Behavior",

referring to the cortex
of the brain.

Now emotional behavior
really might spike you

to feel a certain way (good
or bad, or right or wrong),

but Cortical Behavior is to
point out the shortcomings

so that people can avoid
accidents or fire...

You teach them how to
handle varying situations.

For example, if there's an
automobile accident,

and the children are
trapped in the car,

and the gasoline is spilling over
the engine, and the mother is

"Oh my god! My children are trapped in the car,
they are going to burn to death!"

That's Thalamic Behavior.

If she picks up a log, or a rock
and breaks the windows

and pulls the children out,
that's Cortical Behavior.

We want to convert all
emotions into useful directions

as near as we are able to.

[R. Meadows] - I like the
example of when there's a...

a cliff, and a road on
the side of a cliff,

and the car might go over and
somebody gets in an accident

and the first person that comes
to them, and they're hurt,

and they hold their hand
and they cry with them

and they say "There, there".

And then there's a doctor
that acts upon it

and mends them
and fixes them.

But the engineer that you hear
nothing about, who comes along

and puts a wall at the
side of the road,

or tilts the road and puts the brace
so there are no accidents,

you don't hear anything
about those in society.

And those are the people that really
should be honored.

[P. Joseph] - I couldn't
agree more.

I use the example of,

Mother Teresa vs.
Louis Pasteur,

and people always have
an emotional

affiliation and identification with
the generosity of this person,

yet they don't realize that the scientists
have done more for humanity

than all of the philanthropists
combined.

[R.M.] -Right, and if you designed a
society where you don't need charity,

that's a higher form of
concern and compassion.

[P.J.] -Absolutely.

[J.F.] -Unfortunately, Peter, the society
does that when they work on you,

because each society emphasizes
certain types of emotions.

In motion pictures, soap
operas, we learn it.

We learn to be emotional,
we learn to be irrational

and we learn to be what
some people call stupid,

by associating with stupid people.

The more irrational people
you associate with,

the more difficult it is for your
behavior to become sane.

We resent a murderer
or a thief.

We resent that.

But we don't resent war!!

That's amazing!

If somebody kills somebody,
we get angry.

The abortionists, those who
are against abortion,

you've measured they'd be at the forefront
against war, because it kills everybody:

unborn children, women...
Everybody!

And you would imagine that they
would line up against war.

But, the brain is so manipulated
by the culture,

that they become angry at
using the wrong fork.

You know, if you go to dinner at a
proper place, use the wrong fork,

people become angry
and disappointed in you!

But if you're a racist, they don't,
which is amazing!

The Ku Klux Klan once had
three million members.

That just shows you
where society is.

We are not civilized yet.

We've got a long way to go.

We live in a very 'unsane' culture.

I do not believe we will make
the history books of the future...

Except as a pathetic development
in human evolution.

ALTERNATIVE SOLUTIONS
1.Education

A human being must distinguish
between imagination (marriage)

and reality (physical attraction, sex,
admiration for other people).

When you know our reality, you
will make decisions accordingly,

you will not unconsciously comply with
the culture in which you were born.

At most you will accept cultural
situations as some rituals,

but remain aware of reality.

The monetary system maintains this
culture by promoting the idea of family.

Even worse, they've created
big business from this:

Holidays, specific objects for
the family, houses and cars,

all these things are designed
with the family in mind,

they are just consumption
for the monetary system.

It's very strange how human beings
who comply with the culture,

in this case through
marriage then family,

miss out on millions of opportunities
to meet other people

because they restrict
themselves.

We are so many,
but we know so little.