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← The Pentagon Wars (1998)

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Showing Revision 1 created 01/31/2014 by miguel.m862.

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  2. I think it might be useful to clarify
    a few things right off the bat.
  3. By simple definition,
    we are in the business of winning wars.
  4. What else do you need an army for?
  5. Take the Cold War,
    we won without firing a single shot.
  6. Why? Number one,
    we just flat out out-spent them.
  7. The Russians couldn't shovel money
    into the fire as fast as we could.
  8. Number two, and this is where
    my command comes in,
  9. technology.
  10. Nobody shapes nature the way we do.
  11. We take atoms and molecules
    and make them into everything
  12. from combat boots to bombs.
  13. Bombs the other side will never see
  14. until they're ploughing down their
    chimney like Santa Claus from hell!
  15. (Woman) General?
  16. What?
  17. (Woman) This is not the first time
    you've been here.
  18. We've been down this road before,
    that is correct.
  19. (Woman) Several times, in fact.
  20. I haven't been keeping count.
  21. (Woman) Let me refresh your memory.
    You have before you a document.
  22. I do.
  23. (General) The sensor fused anti-tank missile.
  24. I'll be the first to admit that this programme
    had its share of difficulties.
  25. We did experience a glitch or two
    with the thing, that much is certain.
  26. But even a heat-seeking missile
    can miss a target.
  27. (Woman) General, I see here
    that you taped electric hotplates
  28. to the surface of the vehicle to help
    your heat-seeking missile find its target
  29. and that the temperature
    of the vehicle was so high
  30. that it could have fried an egg at 20 feet!
  31. Commence fire!
  32. There was a verifiable deviation
    of the standard test data accumulation.
  33. (Man) There were other deviations,
    were there not?
  34. What about the Paveway bomb?
  35. I'm not going to tell you
    the Paveway never missed.
  36. (Woman) It missed by a mean distance
    of five miles and nearly 50% of the time.
  37. You know...
  38. in baseball, a guy who hits.400
    is considered pretty damn great.
  39. (Man) In baseball the losing team
    isn't killed by their opponents.
  40. Be that as it may,
    the Paveway is one hell of a bomb.
  41. Laser-guided, state-of-the-art.
  42. (Woman) And it proved what?
    That we have an effective weapon
  43. as long as the enemy allows us
    to build a two-storey crane
  44. directly above their tanks?
  45. We have had some spectacular successes.
  46. - (Man) Such as?
    - That's classified information.
  47. (Man) General...
    (Woman) Let's move on to the next item.
  48. The Bradley fighting vehicle.
  49. What would you say the batting average is
    for the Bradley, General?
  50. It takes people with sophisticated knowledge
    and expertise
  51. to conduct these tests
    and to interpret the results.
  52. If the US Army acted on the advice
  53. of every Tom, Dick and Harry
    who had an opinion,
  54. we'd wind up with a bunch of B-52s
    powered by outboard motors.
  55. - (Man) I fail to see your point.
    - My point is...
  56. that a lot of things have to come together
    to create a new weapon,
  57. and it takes teamwork.
  58. Good, old-fashioned teamwork.
  59. (Woman) Colonel James Burton -
    was he part of your team, General?
  60. (General) More or less.
  61. Post, sir?
  62. Sergeant.
  63. Can you tell me how to get to 4E-624?
  64. Forward into the escalator,
    your left, two flights up to four,
  65. your left, E-ring, your right,
    proceed past corridor nine, face left.
  66. Thank you.
  67. (General) It's no secret that
    Colonel Burton had a rocky tenure,
  68. that we didn't see eye-to-eye.
  69. But it didn't start out that way.
  70. No, no, no, no, no!
  71. I spoke to General Hall.
  72. - General Hall spoke to General Jones...
    - (Knocking)
  73. ...General Jones spoke to Admiral Watts.
  74. Well, then, write it down!
  75. That takes care of Spina in Rhode Island,
    and Mays from Nebraska. Any Democrats?
  76. No, forget him.
  77. Because he's a scum-sucking Judas
    who'd sell his mother for a handful of votes.
  78. (Laughs) How about the Senate?
  79. That son of a bitch.
    After we papered his state with contracts.
  80. All right, let's make the fuselage in Michigan
    and the landing gear in Mississippi.
  81. By all means, let's keep Congressman Groves
    and his bloodsucking buddies happy.
  82. - Welcome, Colonel.
    - Thank you, General.
  83. - You and I ought to get to know one another.
    - I welcome the opportunity, sir.
  84. - Fact is, I'd like to help you.
    - Thank you, sir.
  85. Your new job, under certain circumstances,
    can turn into a real shit-burnin' detail.
  86. You're gonna need friends.
    I'd like you to count me as one.
  87. I appreciate that, sir.
  88. Air Force Academy,
  89. Strategic Air Command,
    MBA from Auburn.
  90. Your commanding officer,
    General De Grasso and I, are old friends.
  91. He says for you the sky is the limit.
  92. But then you draw the short straw.
  93. I was assigned, sir.
  94. Hell, it's a bum deal, whoever made it.
  95. Every other year, somebody decides
    we're spending too much money.
  96. A bunch of pencil-necks get together
    and come up with a plan.
  97. This year, it's the joint
    live-fire test programme.
  98. Staffed from all the services.
  99. So now we got the Army, Navy,
    Air Force and Marines,
  100. doing a circle-jerk over weapons testing,
  101. and you get to hold the big dick.
  102. I mean, who thinks up this nonsense?
  103. Congress, sir?
  104. And so it should, that's its job.
    You'll never hear me criticise the Hill.
  105. You'd think Congress has enough
    of their own shit without wanting ours.
  106. Well, I'm not anticipating any problems, sir.
  107. Neither am I.
  108. A man as clever as you
    knows how to walk a minefield.
  109. Howard Matheson.
  110. Came here two rotations ago.
    That marlin isn't all he caught.
  111. I got him into SenCom and now
    he's head of their missile testing.
  112. - Blake Gelmore, you know Blake?
    - No, sir.
  113. Wasn't even a full-bird colonel
    when he left for the private sector.
  114. That was four years ago.
  115. A few contracts later and look at him...
  116. He could buy and sell both of us
    a thousand times over.
  117. - Lucky man.
    - Smart man.
  118. First-rate soldier, just like you. Knew
    how to make the best of a difficult situation.
  119. This new job of yours is tough.
    It's going to require teamwork.
  120. These are a couple of your projects
    undergoing testing.
  121. The UH-60 helicopter,
    the AV-8B jump-jet
  122. and the Bradley fighting vehicle.
  123. All outstanding programmes,
    all organised and ready to go.
  124. I did a little homework for you.
  125. I appreciate that, General.
  126. You could return the favour by giving
    the Bradley a little extra attention.
  127. Attention?
  128. We need it in the field.
    The sooner the better.
  129. Put it on top of all the things
    in your inbox
  130. so it'll get in your outbox
    as soon as possible.
  131. As a personal favour to me.
  132. - Best of luck, Colonel.
    - Thank you, sir.
  133. - Colonel.
    - Sir?
  134. Next time you're told
    to report to this office, be on time.
  135. Yes, sir.
  136. Sir.
  137. Colonel James Burton,
    I'm here to see the Bradley test.
  138. - Straight ahead, sir.
    - Thank you.
  139. * I wanna be an airborne ranger
  140. * I wanna be an airborne ranger... *
  141. - There he is.
    - That's the guy?
  142. That's him, supposed to be real smart.
  143. Squadron Officer School,
  144. - Air Command and Staff College.
    - First tour with the Pentagon?
  145. He was at the Air Force lab
    when Congress called.
  146. He's a soldier, not just a manager.
  147. - What do you mean?
    - He's put in his fair share of flying time.
  148. Looks like a fucking choirboy.
  149. Maybe, but nothing goes into production
    until he signs off.
  150. (Soldier) Target is now in position...
  151. Colonel Burton, JD Bach.
    Welcome to the team. Ha-ha-ha!
  152. - Colonel Bach.
    - Good to see you.
  153. This is Major Sayers, our chief tester.
    Army Weapons Research Lab.
  154. So how'd an Air Force guy end up
    overseeing tests run by the Army?
  155. - It could have been worse.
    - How's that?
  156. Congress could have appointed
    someone from the Navy.
  157. (Soldier) The range is now hot.
    The range is now hot.
  158. Commencing armour penetration tests
    on the Bradley fighting vehicle.
  159. Attention on the firing line.
    Attention on the firing line.
  160. Are you ready on the right?
  161. Ready on the left?
  162. Firing line is ready.
  163. Firing detail, commence firing.
  164. Cease fire. Cease fire.
  165. - Ha-ha! Damn impressive armour.
    - Congratulations.
  166. All right, drinks are on me, gentlemen.
    Joining us, Colonel Burton?
  167. Congratulations, thanks for your help.
  168. We couldn't have done it without you. Thanks.
  169. - Say, Colonel, are you gonna join us?
    - Well...
  170. Shouldn't we take a closer look?
  171. No, actually, safety precautions.
  172. See, the fire team goes out first,
  173. no one else is allowed near the vehicle
    for another hour.
  174. - Why is that?
    - Any test involving a live round,
  175. there's a freak chance
    that something might blow.
  176. We don't wanna lose you
    first day on the job, Colonel.
  177. - How about that drink?
    - Sounds good, Major.
  178. There'll be a phone call for you in your office
    at 1100 hours. It's important you be there.
  179. - Good morning.
    - Welcome, sir.
  180. - Welcome, sir.
    - Morning.
  181. - Morning, Sergeant.
    - Good morning, sir.
  182. - I unpacked a few of your things.
    - Thank you, Sergeant.
  183. - Family, sir?
    - What's that?
  184. - Family.
    - Oh, that's my uncle.
  185. - He was a flier in World War II.
    - Hm.
  186. Huh!
  187. - What's that?
    - The plane I learned to fly in, a T-28.
  188. I used to take her up, slide the canopy back,
  189. and fly for hours.
  190. Just me and the sky.
  191. Personally, I like the sky where it is -
    with me on the ground looking up at it.
  192. So, where you from, sir?
  193. Just outside of Chicago.
  194. Hm. And where would that be?
  195. Normal.
  196. Normal, Illinois, is that on the map?
  197. Yes, Sergeant, it is.
  198. Is it normal in Normal?
  199. I think the word is uneventful.
  200. You getting paid by the hour, Colonel?
  201. No, I got an appointment.
  202. (Phone)
  203. I'II, um... take this, Sergeant, thank you.
  204. Fine.
  205. Mm-hm.
  206. Colonel Burton.
  207. Hello?
  208. The test on the Bradley,
    I hear you wanted a closer look.
  209. How did you hear that?
  210. When it comes to the Bradley,
    follow your instincts, Colonel.
  211. - Who is this?
    - I can't tell you that right now.
  212. Well, whoever you are, I don't take
    unsolicited advice from people I don't know.
  213. Just make sure you read
    the fine print, Colonel.
  214. Sir, Colonel Burton. Sir.
  215. You're up early, sir.
  216. I'm on my way to the office, Sergeant.
    Thought I'd check out the Bradley.
  217. Sir, isn't your office 40 miles that way, sir?
  218. Yes, Sergeant, yes, it is.
  219. Has anything been altered
    on this vehicle since the test?
  220. No, sir.
  221. Are you looking for something, sir?
  222. Just reading the fine print, Sergeant.
    Just reading the fine print.
  223. Stinger missiles, 50 cal tracers.
  224. 7.62 tracers.
  225. 25mm rounds.
  226. - What's this?
    - That was used on the Bradley, sir.
  227. This writing, it's Romanian, isn't it?
  228. Yes, sir, it is.
  229. Sir, Colonel Bach and Major Sayers
    won't be here until noon.
  230. That's when our first test is scheduled, sir.
  231. This isn't exactly an all-out test, Sergeant.
    More like a little pop quiz.
  232. I'm not sure regulations allow us to borrow
    the door from the ammunition shed
  233. for a pop quiz, sir.
  234. Sir, regulations state that the ammunition shed
    should never be left open, sir.
  235. Duly noted, Sergeant.
  236. Regulations also apply
    to removing the door, Colonel.
  237. Also duly noted.
  238. Fire when ready.
  239. Backblast area clear! On the way, sir.
  240. Fire.
  241. (Soldier shouts instructions)
  242. Come on straight... Hold!
  243. You wrecked a door?
  244. Colonel, the ammunition
    used on the test on the Bradley
  245. is the same as we used on this door.
  246. Romanian - the most ineffective
    ammunition in the world.
  247. - No wonder the Bradley passed.
    - This is serious.
  248. - It is!
    - Yes, you destroyed a door.
  249. It was tested on
    an armoured personnel carrier,
  250. a vehicle to carry soldiers into combat.
  251. This door is property of
    the United States government.
  252. The shell barely penetrated the door.
  253. OK, but it's all bent.
    How are you gonna put it back?
  254. I'm not really worried about that!
  255. - This door protects our ammunition.
    - The ammunition doesn't work!
  256. But we need the ammunition for our tests.
  257. Look - I'll buy the Army
    a new goddamn door.
  258. You can't afford a door like that.
    Did you see what it stood up to?
  259. Exactly! Some spitball from Romania!
  260. It was my understanding that only Soviet arms
    would be used in these tests.
  261. Well, yes, and Romania
    is one of the Soviet blocs...
  262. - Isn't it?
    - Colonel Burton,
  263. we've been testing
    the Bradley for some time.
  264. You may not be aware
    of some steps we've taken.
  265. The Romanian rocket is only 73mm.
    That's less than the 85mm Russian.
  266. A smaller diameter means
    a smaller explosion and less shrapnel.
  267. We're conducting tests
    using ammunition of varying diameters
  268. to determine the exact threshold
    of the Bradley's tolerance.
  269. So far it's held up against everything
    we've thrown at it, sir - Soviet, Romanian.
  270. Latvian, Lithuanian...
  271. Like a rock.
  272. My apologies.
  273. You're new to the project.
  274. There's a lot to catch up on.
  275. You're right. So if you'll get me
    the test reports, I can catch right up.
  276. - How's that, Colonel?
    - Send me the data,
  277. I'll do my homework,
    and we can push through.
  278. We've got five years of test reports, sir.
  279. - We have a schedule.
    - Let's keep to it,
  280. get the Bradley into production, ASAP,
    what do you say?
  281. Thank you, gentlemen.
  282. This could blow the whole deal.
  283. You've got to stop this
    like you did with the last guy.
  284. - Don't worry about it.
    - Sir, he wants to see the reports.
  285. - Just give him the reports.
    - Are you out of your mind?
  286. Now listen to me. Listen very carefully.
  287. Give him everything he wants.
  288. Every single piece of paper.
  289. Everything.
  290. - Sergeant?
    - Here, sir.
  291. What the heck is all this?
  292. Everything you ever wanted to know about
    the Bradley and weren't afraid to ask.
  293. Every memo on every last nut and bolt.
  294. I wonder which national forest
    died for this project.
  295. - You read any of this stuff?
    - I hoped you'd have the Cliff Notes.
  296. - I hardly know where to start.
    - Maybe that's the whole idea.
  297. (Burton) I don't get it.
    (Secretary) What?
  298. - That.
    - It's the Bradley.
  299. Well, if that's the Bradley, then what's this?
  300. - What's the date?
    - 1968.
  301. The question is, how did they get to that...
  302. from this?
  303. Gentlemen, our mission
    was to design and implement
  304. an infantry transport vehicle
    that would be a worthy replacement
  305. for the M-113 armoured personnel carrier.
  306. We have met that objective and then some.
  307. The Bradley armoured personnel carrier
  308. will bring troops to a combat zone
    swiftly, efficiently, and safely.
  309. It will hold 11 men plus a driver,
  310. and features a 20mm cannon,
  311. which will provide
    ample firepower and flexibility.
  312. Lightly armoured, speedy
    and solidly engineered,
  313. our troops will arrive at the battlefield
    in the finest American technology.
  314. And at a million and a half per,
    a real bargain.
  315. Nice work, Colonel!
  316. Outstanding!
  317. Damn impressive!
  318. So it was a big taxicab - drive guys
    to the battlefield and go back home.
  319. Mm-hm.
  320. (Burton) But how did it
    end up with a turret on top?
  321. Hm. Hm-hm-hm.
  322. - This is all well and good...
    - Something wrong, General?
  323. There won't be anything left in the budget
    for my scout.
  324. I doubt it, Bob.
  325. You don't need scouts -
    you have radar, air-recon, satellites.
  326. You always need a scout -
    why couldn't this thing serve as a scout?
  327. But it's a troop carrier, General.
  328. This is a speedy vehicle. Why can't it be both?
  329. For one thing, it's too big.
  330. And you can't really see out much from inside.
  331. - Sounds like a design flaw to me.
    - Design flaw? No...
  332. We'll just stick a turret on top
    with lots of opticals.
  333. But then, sir, it'll be even bigger.
  334. What's your problem, Smith?
    Not elegant enough for you?
  335. (Laughter)
  336. The thing is, it's hard to do a "sneak
    and peek" when you're over ten feet tall.
  337. - He's got a point, Bob.
    - We need a scout.
  338. This is fast enough and it's funded.
  339. - Actually, we're a hair over budget.
    - Turn the Bradley into a scout
  340. and we're gonna be selling them off
    to some el presidente in no time!
  341. Anything for surveillance
    ends up south of the border.
  342. That anti-aircraft gun,
    who backed you up on that?
  343. - You did, Bob.
    - Who testified to Appropriations?
  344. - You did, Bob.
    - I'm talking to Appropriations next week.
  345. Do I sell you on my scout or do I not?
  346. You did, Bob.
  347. How about portholes along the side?
  348. So the fellas can stick out their guns
    and shoot people!
  349. Good. And you know what, Colonel?
  350. We already have the turret.
    We oughta get the biggest bang we can.
  351. I'm sorry - bang, sir?
  352. You can't hurt anybody
    with that pansy-ass gun!
  353. Add on some firepower!
  354. - Where do I fit the extra ammo?
    - I don't know. Shift things around.
  355. 4400 rounds of machine gun ammo,
    and you wanna add 25mm shells?
  356. - The General wants his ammo.
    - He can't have it unless he carries it.
  357. - Can you squeeze it in?
    - No.
  358. Just squeeze it in!
  359. We're not trying on Levi's here, Colonel.
  360. Are you telling me that in a vehicle this size,
  361. you can't fit a few rounds of ammunition?
  362. Not in its current configuration, no, sir.
  363. So, the configuration is wrong.
    There must be something you can dump.
  364. - Dump, sir?
    - Something you don't need.
  365. General, the interior is very spare.
  366. Besides the ammunition and the men...
  367. Leave one of the fellas behind.
    Put the ammo where the men go.
  368. Sir...
  369. it is a troop carrier.
  370. So, make a couple of extra trips,
    what's the difference?
  371. They want a transport
    that doesn't carry men,
  372. and a scout that's got a cannon
    as big as a tank's.
  373. - And portholes.
    - Great, portholes!
  374. To shoot at whatever
    they can't hit with their cannon.
  375. You don't have to buy it, just draw it.
  376. - That's one hell of a cannon.
    - That's the problem.
  377. Why?
  378. You go out on a battlefield
    with this pecker sticking out of your turret,
  379. and the enemy is gonna
    unload on you with all they got.
  380. But it's a troop carrier, not a tank.
  381. You want me to put a sign on it -
  382. "I am a troop carrier, not a tank,
    please don't shoot"?
  383. This was going to be so beautiful.
  384. - Good work, Smith.
    - Looks perfect.
  385. - Thank you, sir.
    - The thing is...
  386. Yes, General?
  387. Looks a little like a tank with that cannon.
    Probably gonna draw more fire.
  388. Actually, sir, that has come to our attention.
  389. We know it's not a tank,
    but will the other side?
  390. I guess we could always thicken the armour.
  391. Colonel Smith, could you explain
    why you put those portholes there?
  392. Yes, sir, as per your request,
    so the men can shoot out at the enemy.
  393. - You're joking, aren't you?
    - Portholes? Are we in the navy?
  394. Say... you think you could
    make this thing amphibious?
  395. Get the troops across a river?
  396. No.
  397. No, sir. No.
  398. No, no, no, no, no.
  399. Amphibious?
    The Bradley's supposed to swim?
  400. In theory, at least.
  401. Amphibious troop carrier slash scout...
  402. Slash tank.
  403. A couple more months,
    I bet this thing can fly.
  404. What's this in the margin?
  405. "Please help me,
  406. "I am losing my mind,
  407. "RLS."
  408. Lieutenant Colonel Robert Laurel Smith,
    head of oversight and development.
  409. Aluminium.
  410. - This thing's got an aluminium skin.
    - Huh?
  411. Anything fired at it will go through it
    like a hot knife through butter.
  412. We're using steel rather than aluminium.
  413. Of course, steel is
    much heavier than aluminium,
  414. so it won't go as fast.
  415. We can't lose speed -
    it won't work as a scout.
  416. It won't keep pace with tanks, either.
  417. Armour's a reactive measure.
    Let's think proactive.
  418. Equip it with anti-tank missiles,
  419. then it can blast those enemy tanks
    before they fire.
  420. What do you think, Colonel?
  421. Fine.
  422. - Anti-tank missiles?
    - I don't know.
  423. The men will have to wear
    the missiles as hats!
  424. I don't know, Jones.
    That's why you get paid big bucks.
  425. - Colonel, we're not talking about...
    - A pair of Levi's. I know!
  426. God damn it!
  427. We are talking about 11 years
    with nothing to show for it!
  428. Except an ulcer the size
    of the district of Columbia
  429. and a career on permanent hold!
  430. You see this?
  431. I've been... I've been a bird colonel so long,
    I swear I'm growing feathers!
  432. If you have to design hats to haul
    those goddamn missiles, then just do it.
  433. (Low chatter)
  434. Excuse me, sir...
  435. Uh... ladies and gentlemen,
    if I can have your attention, please.
  436. If you'd all just take your seats.
  437. Thank you.
  438. We are pleased to present a scale model
  439. of the new Bradley fighting vehicle.
  440. (* America The Beautiful)
  441. (Choir) * America... *
  442. (Gasps of admiration)
  443. * America
  444. * America... *
  445. Featuring scout, troop transport,
    and anti-tank capabilities,
  446. it carries six men.
  447. How many was it supposed to carry?
  448. - 11.
    - The Bradley is outfitted
  449. with sophisticated surveillance equipment.
  450. It is also equipped with a rapid-fire cannon,
    and an anti-tank rocket launcher.
  451. Which means it's loaded with...
  452. 1500 shells and ten TOW anti-tank missiles.
  453. So in summation, gentlemen,
    what you have before you is...
  454. A troop transport that can't carry troops,
  455. a reconnaissance vehicle that's
    too conspicuous to do reconnaissance...
  456. And a quasi-tank that has
    less armour than a snow-blower
  457. but has enough ammo to take out half of DC.
  458. - Fantastic.
    - Congratulations, General Smith.
  459. - General?
    - Helluva job.
  460. General?
  461. Let's build it.
  462. They're building it?
  463. This is what we're building?
  464. * America *
  465. Please be seated.
  466. This will be brief,
    I'm needed at the Oval Office.
  467. I want to show you
    this morning's New York Times.
  468. If you'd be so kind to turn
    to the editorial page.
  469. It essentially says that every weapon
    we produce is overpriced junk.
  470. Now, that's not news.
    Critics have said it for years.
  471. What was news to me
  472. touched on our supposedly spectacular
    "Sergeant York" anti-aircraft gun.
  473. It says there when the Sergeant York
    proved incapable of hitting airplanes,
  474. we test-fired it at hovering helicopters.
  475. When it failed to hit hovering helicopters,
  476. we fired at stationary targets
    and it missed those.
  477. Now is this possible, General Keane?
  478. There was a problem with the proximity fusing.
  479. According to this, one missile locked
    on to a ventilation fan in the latrine!
  480. And destroyed the latrine.
    Were we test-firing at latrines that day?
  481. My first sergeant was in that latrine
    and he's around to swear otherwise.
  482. Why am I learning about this
    in the newspaper?
  483. It makes me look foolish,
    and I am not a foolish man.
  484. General Cushing, any problems
    with the Maverick missile tests?
  485. No, sir.
  486. Admiral Morehouse, any problems?
  487. - None whatsoever, sir.
    - General Partridge...
  488. - Sir!
    - Problems with the Bradley?
  489. No, sir, absolutely not.
  490. Production is imminent.
  491. Mr Secretary, I believe
    the press is on a wild-goose chase,
  492. looking for problems where none exist.
  493. Let's hope you're right, General.
    Because we do have problems.
  494. Terrorists in Lebanon,
    and Colonel Qadhafi in Libya,
  495. and Sandinistas in Nicaragua,
  496. and let's not forget our ongoing problems
    with the Soviet Union.
  497. Frankly, I don't appreciate calls
    from reporters and congressmen
  498. asking me why nothing
    we are working on works,
  499. and I can't answer them because
    the men developing these systems
  500. tell me everything is just peachy!
  501. So, if you don't have problems, good.
  502. If you do, get rid of them.
  503. I want these weapons built.
    If not by you, I'll find men who can.
  504. You wanted to see me, sir?
  505. Yes, I do.
  506. Close the damn door, come on.
  507. About these tests you've been
    thinking about conducting on the Bradley.
  508. I understand your concern,
  509. but if you were an armoured warfare expert
    instead of a flier,
  510. you'd understand
    the Bradley is a good vehicle.
  511. 4,000 Americans will be employed building it,
    the Army wants it.
  512. - Read the files...
    - I've read the files, sir.
  513. 200 pages on the rear door,
  514. 250 pages on the paint job,
    computer simulations of combat -
  515. not a single test that indicates what
    might happen if the Bradley takes a hit.
  516. Which is why I've ordered
    a full-up live fire test.
  517. I want to equip a Bradley with
    all the ammunition it would take into battle,
  518. fill all the fuel tanks, and hit it
    with a Soviet anti-tank weapon,
  519. - to see how it'll hold up.
    - Cancel it.
  520. Sir?
  521. I think we're having
    a communication meltdown.
  522. Whatever problems there are, we'll fix them -
    in the field, after they're deployed.
  523. - General...
    - That's the way we're gonna do this.
  524. Nobody takes your job
    more seriously than I do,
  525. but I also have a job -
    to deploy that Bradley.
  526. I want that rocket launcher
    pointed at the Soviets.
  527. Here.
  528. Jesus.
  529. Dismissed.
  530. - Afternoon. Afternoon.
    - Good afternoon, sir.
  531. - Fanning!
    - Yes, sir?
  532. - What happened to you?
    - Don't ask. What's this?
  533. It was on your desk
    when I got back from lunch.
  534. Some ammunition for your Bradley battle.
  535. Hm!
  536. It's a British Army test report.
  537. Top secret too.
  538. Until it landed here.
  539. General Smith, Jim Burton.
  540. (Clears throat)
  541. How did you find me?
  542. You have very distinctive handwriting.
  543. I've been reading memos on the Bradley
    going back to 1968,
  544. with your handwritten notes in the margin,
    or... initialled by you.
  545. - This handwriting?
    - We should not be seen talking.
  546. Look, you contacted me, General.
  547. No. You received an anonymous leak
    about which I know nothing.
  548. The British found out that aluminium
    gives off a toxic gas when hit by a shell.
  549. Bad news for men
    in aluminium armoured vehicles.
  550. Couldn't we... couldn't we sit down
    somewhere and actually talk?
  551. If the Pentagon had their choice
    of busting us or nailing a Soviet spy,
  552. they would choose us in a heartbeat.
  553. Who exactly is "us", General?
  554. Some people who work in the Pentagon
    are fed up watching billions of dollars
  555. thrown away on defective weapons
    upon which our troops stake their lives.
  556. People like you, Colonel.
    We are the enemy.
  557. - To whom?
    - To majors who want to be colonels,
  558. colonels who want to be generals,
    you bet we are the enemy.
  559. To move up, you have to get things done.
  560. You don't want to be the one
    who drops the ball,
  561. cos if you drop the ball,
    no promotion, no star,
  562. no cushy job with a contractor
    when you retire.
  563. Which is why, Colonel, everyone
    attached to the Bradley will stop your tests.
  564. General, I appreciate your interests
    if not your methods.
  565. Whatever disagreements
    I may be having over the Bradley
  566. will be resolved above board.
  567. Now, if you have something to say,
  568. I'm sure the Washington Post
    would love to talk to you.
  569. Me? The press? Are you crazy?
    The Army is my life.
  570. Like you, I work inside the system, and
    you don't have a prayer of running your tests,
  571. not unless you're willing
    to sacrifice your career.
  572. And if you think you're safe because
    Congress gave you your job, think again.
  573. Good day, Colonel. And good luck.
  574. So why did you send me that report?
  575. Sir.
  576. - Nice to see you, General.
    - Good to see you.
  577. - Evening, sir.
    - Evening, sir.
  578. So she whispered to me, "Why do you think
    the General always stands at attention?"
  579. (Laughter)
  580. - Sir, Major Sayers is in the library.
    - Tell Major Sayers I'm busy.
  581. He said the little prick
    ordered tests on the Bradley.
  582. What? I'll have his ass in a sling so fast.
  583. Whose ass, sir? Major Sayers
    or the little prick?
  584. General, he knows about
    the study the Brits did.
  585. - What study?
    - On aluminium.
  586. Aluminium's used on the Bradley, sir.
  587. When hit by a shell, it burns
    and gives off a toxic gas.
  588. God damn it.
  589. We fought a revolution
    so we could ignore the fucking British!
  590. So why mess things up now?
  591. - I thought you talked to him.
    - I did.
  592. - The man must be a fool.
    - Can't you stop him, sir?
  593. No, I'm not his commanding officer.
  594. Some draft-dodging junior congressman
    wanted more objectivity in the testing process.
  595. Goddamn checks and balances.
  596. General, with all due respect,
    this isn't just a check, sir,
  597. it's a full fucking body block!
  598. If we don't get the Bradley out there now,
    it'll be stuck in development forever.
  599. Start production now.
  600. Throw Burton a bone or two.
    Let him run a couple of tests.
  601. Yes, sir. General, actually,
    he'd like to blow it up.
  602. I don't give a fuck what Burton wants.
  603. Let him do some piddly-shit stuff,
    see if he can parallel park the fucker!
  604. Just get it into production.
  605. (Woman) Am I to understand
    that you were not in favour
  606. of the tests Colonel Burton proposed?
  607. Absolutely not.
  608. (Woman) Absolutely not, yes,
    or absolutely not, no?
  609. Absolutely not absolutely.
  610. (Man) Are you questioning
    his motives or his methods?
  611. I have no reason to question
    Colonel Burton's motives.
  612. I can only speak to his methods.
  613. Which, by anyone's definition
    were somewhat peculiar.
  614. There were other ways to find out
  615. if clothing would catch fire
    inside the Bradley when it took a hit.
  616. Let's take the... the mannequin thing.
  617. - Colonel.
    - Yes?
  618. - Phone call, sir. They said it's important.
    - Very good.
  619. - Dalton.
    - Yes, sir.
  620. - I'll meet you back at the firing area.
    - Yes, sir.
  621. - Strip the dummies.
    - Sir?
  622. Strip the dummies, Sergeant, now.
  623. Thank you. Let's go.
  624. Fire when ready.
  625. Backblast area clear!
  626. - Out of the way, sir.
    - Fire.
  627. (Coughing)
  628. Hold it there. Let me see those.
  629. Uh-huh. That looks good,
    uniforms look good. Great, there you go.
  630. Wait a minute, what's that?
  631. That's part of our test, Colonel.
  632. Wait a minute.
  633. (Partridge) No one in my command
    gave the order to strip the dummies
  634. and put their clothes
    inside a fireproof container
  635. inside the vehicle while
    Colonel Burton wasn't around.
  636. You're a pair of clowns!
  637. The insults that were traded that day
  638. had no business
    showing up in the test reports.
  639. They were deleted from the final report.
  640. All except Colonel Bach's unfortunate
    reference to Colonel Burton's mother.
  641. Temperatures were running high.
  642. (Man) Apparently inside the Bradley as well.
  643. There's a degree of uncertainty
    involved in every test.
  644. That's the point of doing tests -
    to find out what happens.
  645. If we knew what the results would be,
    we wouldn't need to do the test.
  646. And just because the tests
    didn't always come out
  647. the way Colonel Burton expected...
  648. is no reason to assume that
    anything devious was going on.
  649. (Woman) I ask you, General,
    filling the fuel tanks with water
  650. for a test designed
    to check the combustibility
  651. of those tanks - that wasn't devious?
  652. If the tanks had been filled with fuel
  653. there's a good chance
    the vehicle would have exploded.
  654. (Man) Isn't that the point?
  655. If the vehicle had exploded,
    we couldn't run additional tests.
  656. I can't order up an unlimited number
    of Bradleys just to blow them up!
  657. Unless you're telling me
    to spend more money.
  658. (Woman) General, I believe that efforts
    were made to make the Bradley amphibious?
  659. Yes, although how that's relevant
    I fail to comprehend.
  660. (Man) How many Bradleys
    were lost during that experiment?
  661. Lost?
  662. (Man) The report says
    four of the Bradleys sank during testing.
  663. That is a matter of opinion.
  664. (Woman) It's not opinion, General.
  665. Four of them sank.
  666. Technically, yes.
  667. (Woman) General,
    can we get back to the fuel tanks?
  668. Come on. Good.
  669. Sergeant, have the tanks
    always been filled with water?
  670. No, sir.
  671. Only when the vehicle is being tested, sir.
  672. What else don't I know?
  673. Sergeant, I'm asking you a question.
  674. What else don't I know about these tests?
  675. The ammunition stored in the Bradley, sir.
  676. What about it?
  677. Sand.
  678. That's affirmative, sir.
  679. (Snorts)
  680. Tell me...
  681. did the term "court-martial"
  682. ever enter anyone's mind here?
  683. - No, sir.
    - Really?
  684. That's truly amazing, Sergeant.
  685. Here we are watching
    water drip out of the gas tanks
  686. and sand spill out of the ammunition
  687. after a test that was done to figure out
    whether or not the damn thing is safe!
  688. And no one here even thinks
    of the term "court-martial"?
  689. Now why, if you don't mind my asking, is that?
  690. We were under orders, sir.
  691. Is acting on those orders
    conscionable, Sergeant?
  692. It doesn't matter what I think or do, sir,
  693. because you desk warriors from Washington
  694. will find a million different ways
  695. to make the tests turn out
    whatever way you want, sir.
  696. I'm not here to manipulate test results.
  697. - I'm here to learn the truth.
    - You want the truth, sir?
  698. We get a new white knight
    every other year, sir.
  699. Some guy just like you,
    and you all start off the same.
  700. Big speeches that turn to shit after six months
    when your next promotion comes due.
  701. And then it's business as usual.
  702. Where did you pick up
    this lousy attitude, Sergeant?
  703. Right here, sir,
  704. watching guys like you.
  705. Well, I'm sorry.
  706. I'm really sorry to hear that.
  707. Cos unlike you, I take my job seriously.
  708. Really?
  709. Well, maybe... maybe
    you can explain to me, Colonel,
  710. why the Bradley has been ordered into
    production before you have done your job.
  711. What is this?
    100 Bradleys have been ordered?
  712. I'm not gonna have it on my record
    that the Bradley fell behind schedule
  713. because of some goddamn tests.
  714. Those goddamn tests could save lives.
  715. The Bradley will save lives, Colonel,
    by bringing men to the front line.
  716. Do you know what would happen to those men
  717. if the Bradley is hit and the aluminium burns?
  718. I know all about the British study, Colonel.
    And it is bullshit.
  719. That thing could be a deathtrap.
  720. - Says who?
    - Says me.
  721. Have you put people in there during the test?
  722. - No, of...
    - So you don't actually know anything.
  723. And until you do,
    all you're doing is wasting our time.
  724. (Woman) Are you suggesting Colonel Burton
    had no reason to be concerned?
  725. I am suggesting
    that Colonel Burton and his tests
  726. did not reveal anything
    we didn't already know.
  727. Except his own penchant for theatrics.
  728. - (Man) Theatrics, General?
    - Yes, theatrics.
  729. Cheap theatrics at that.
  730. Now the little prick has issued a memo
  731. that stipulates that for the tests
    he'd like to use sheep.
  732. Jesus, we already started work
    on the chassis assembly.
  733. - Don't worry.
    - If the sheep die
  734. - we're gonna have to stop production.
    - There are ways around it.
  735. - Absolutely.
    - Like what?
  736. We could sic the animal rights people on him.
  737. It is cruel and unusual treatment of sheep.
  738. Rack of lamb.
  739. Yeah, that would be me.
  740. (Phone)
  741. - Yes.
    - (Fanning) Major Sayers just called, sir.
  742. - When do they plan to run the tests?
    - As soon as we send over the sheep.
  743. "We"? I thought they were
    in charge of the sheep.
  744. They say it's being handled at our end.
  745. The Surgeon General's office.
  746. What does the Surgeon General
    have to do with sheep?
  747. - Excuse me.
    - Colonel Burton.
  748. - We were told you might show up.
    - Who told you that?
  749. Colonel Bach, he established this office
    last week with the Surgeon General.
  750. - You're trying to kill the Bradley.
    - Who told you that?
  751. I'm sorry, sir, all information
    in this office is classified.
  752. So, what is
    "ruminant procurement" anyway?
  753. That's what this office has been created to do.
  754. - But what is it?
    - Analysis and policy determination
  755. for tendered research data
    on the optimal test ruminant.
  756. Such ruminants are to be...
  757. You're talking about sheep.
    You're in charge of buying sheep, correct?
  758. We can't just go out and buy sheep, sir.
  759. Why not?
  760. We're doing a vaporifics test on sheep.
  761. Vaporifics is all about what happens
    when a warhead penetrates armour.
  762. Lieutenant, I know what a vaporifics test is.
  763. I'm the one who called for it.
  764. Well, then you know we have to have
    sheep specs before we can proceed.
  765. Sheep specs, what is sheep specs?
  766. Specifications!
  767. Shorn or unshorn, rams, ewes or lambs?
  768. Merinos or short hair?
    Shorn merino ewes or unshorn merino lambs?
  769. Bighorns or domestic?
    Domestic shorn lambs or bighorn unshorn?
  770. Just, how long will it take you
    to get your sheep specs?
  771. Not long at all, six, eight months, tops.
  772. But then we'll require another eight months
    to evaluate the data.
  773. After which we can move
    into prototype ruminant evaluation...
  774. - How much?
    - Well...
  775. All right, bring it back.
  776. Keep it coming. Keep it coming.
    Keep it coming.
  777. A little more. A little more.
  778. Whoa!
  779. Sir, Colonel Bach is on his way over here, sir.
  780. I'm sure he is.
  781. It sounded like a world-class shit-fit, sir.
  782. I'm sure it is, Sergeant.
  783. - Come on, move it.
    - What are these sheep doing here?
  784. - I bought them.
    - You can't do that!
  785. - Well, I did.
    - There are no sheep specs, Colonel!
  786. - I devised the specs, Major.
    - What are they?
  787. They're live and kicking,
    and that's good enough for me.
  788. Testing is a science, Colonel.
    It needs controlled experiments.
  789. - Just sticking sheep into a...
    - All right, you don't want sheep?
  790. Lennon, Chavez,
    get the sheep out of there,
  791. - and get in the Bradley. Dalton!
    - Yes, sir?
  792. Get in the Bradley.
  793. - Sir?
    - I need a vaporifics test, get in the Bradley.
  794. - Everyone inside.
    - Are you out of your fucking mind?
  795. You think this is
    some kind of joke, Colonel?
  796. All right, we'll just use the sheep.
    That's a terrific idea.
  797. Use the sheep in the Bradley.
    Go on, sheep.
  798. Get in there... God damn it!
  799. Backblast area, clear!
  800. - On the way, sir.
    - Fire!
  801. (Gasping)
  802. Oh, God, Granger, don't breathe!
  803. - What the hell happened?
    - The damn fumes!
  804. Stay back!
  805. - How are you doing?
    - I'm OK.
  806. Jesus, just one tiny whiff...
  807. Did you get a look inside?
  808. Nothing could have survived those fumes.
  809. Sergeant, where are the sheep?
  810. Major Sayers said they had to be incinerated.
  811. - What?
    - They carted them away, sir.
  812. Whoa! No! Whoa! Stop, stop, stop!
  813. - Follow those sheep!
    - Sir?
  814. - Stop that truck, that's an order!
    - Yes, sir.
  815. Sergeant.
  816. I need them, for autopsy.
  817. To verify test results.
  818. I see him, we got him, sir.
  819. (Siren blaring)
  820. (Siren blaring)
  821. - Pay no attention to them!
    - Sir?
  822. Concentrate on the sheep.
  823. Look out!
  824. Move it!
  825. Come on!
  826. Damn it, what are you stopping us for?
  827. - Stop the sheep!
    - What's the hurry, sir?
  828. Not one of the tests I've ordered
    has been conducted according to plan.
  829. And since my job...
  830. Your job is to stop whining and serve
    the United States as befits an officer!
  831. My job is to oversee the joint live-fire
    test programme and report to Congress.
  832. In order to do that, I'm gonna have to insist
    on a live-fire test of the Bradley
  833. under combat conditions.
  834. Listen to me, fly-boy,
    you don't know shit about combat!
  835. I know there are a lot of ways
    to die in that vehicle, sir.
  836. - Don't you preach to me!
    - I want a realistic...
  837. - The number one priority is...
    - People first, vehicles second!!
  838. Those are my priorities. The Army's
    priorities seem to be the exact opposite.
  839. You are way out of line here.
  840. I won't sign off on the Bradley
    without a live-fire test.
  841. - (Man) Sir?
    - Who is Burton's commanding officer?
  842. General De Grasso, sir.
  843. Get him for me now.
  844. It's an economic move, Colonel,
    you're being reassigned.
  845. In the meantime, should I... continue
    in my present assignment?
  846. Your present assignment
    has been eliminated, Colonel.
  847. I didn't think my job could be eliminated.
  848. - I was appointed by Congress.
    - But you're paid by the Army.
  849. If they can't afford you - and they can't -
    you have no job.
  850. Colonel, it's time to move on.
  851. Let's not let this little blip on the screen
    ground you permanently.
  852. Would the Colonel ever consider
    having a drink with an enlisted soldier?
  853. Does the enlisted soldier
    think the Colonel needs one?
  854. - What are they gonna do, fire you?
    - OK, just a little one.
  855. (Snorts and coughs)
  856. You know what's really ironic?
  857. General Omar Bradley was a brilliant tactician
    and a great leader.
  858. No ego, just did the job.
  859. And he looked out for the morale
    and the safety of his men.
  860. And they go and put his name on this thing!
  861. Talk about a kick in the ass.
  862. The closest the brass ever get to a battlefield
  863. is the first tee on a Saturday morning.
  864. You know, Fanning...
  865. I've been around long enough to know
    that the Pentagon is not a charity,
  866. it's cashflows and egos.
  867. That's part of it, it's what helps drive it,
    fine, but...
  868. somehow...
  869. somehow I always thought the men came first.
  870. I always thought that the people on top knew
  871. that it was about the soldier in the field.
  872. You gave it your best shot.
  873. - Did I?
    - Yes, sir, you did.
  874. Well, now it's somebody else's problem.
  875. My problem is salvaging my career.
  876. Which apparently is not beyond repair
    if I'm a good little boy.
  877. So, that's it.
  878. That's it.
  879. The man said, "war is hell".
  880. He should've tried peacetime.
  881. - You don't mind, do you?
    - No, be my guest.
  882. I don't believe in government waste.
  883. (Phone)
  884. - Burton.
    - So they're moving you out?
  885. Is there anything you don't hear about?
  886. Well, how far are you willing to go
    with this thing?
  887. The question is...
    how far are they going to send me?
  888. You ought to take a trip to California
    this weekend.
  889. I'm not up for a vacation right now.
  890. No one goes to Fresno
    for a vacation, Colonel.
  891. - Can I help you, sir?
    - Colonel Burton.
  892. I'm here to see the project manager.
  893. - Colonel Burton?
    - Yes.
  894. Steve Johnson, project manager.
  895. Hi, thank you.
  896. All set, let's go!
  897. What's going on here?
    Who changed the specs?
  898. The Israelis.
  899. The Israelis? When?
  900. When they placed their order.
  901. - So these are for export?
    - Yes.
  902. - All of them?
    - Yes, Colonel.
  903. You're telling me we're manufacturing
    two different versions of this vehicle?
  904. The Israelis wouldn't take the Bradley
    as designed, Colonel.
  905. They wanted the fuel tanks on the outside,
  906. reinforced armour,
    a different ventilation system...
  907. All right.
    What about the specs for our Bradleys?
  908. Exactly like the ones
    you're testing, Colonel. No change.
  909. - You think you were followed?
    - Followed?
  910. I drove for hours.
    I don't even know where we are.
  911. Maybe you'd prefer to meet
    at the officers' club?
  912. - When did the Israelis test it?
    - They didn't have to,
  913. they knew by looking at it
    that it was a deathtrap.
  914. So while we're sending our guys off to die,
  915. the Pentagon brass is redesigning
    the damn thing for somebody else!
  916. They can't sell it overseas like it is.
  917. Business as usual.
  918. So maybe you'd like to keep
    fighting the bastards?
  919. I've lost my job, General.
    They're moving me out.
  920. So, they're moving you out,
    you haven't been discharged.
  921. Work from inside,
    from wherever they send you.
  922. And turn into you?
  923. Passing anonymous notes
    and meeting in parking lots?
  924. You're great at sitting in the shadows.
    Why don't you do something?
  925. I can't.
  926. - Help me!
    - I have done everything that I can.
  927. I've been fighting this for almost 20 years.
  928. I'm not gonna go to the mat over this!
    I... I've got too much to lose.
  929. 70,000 troops.
  930. 70,000 American boys
    will ride into battle in the Bradley
  931. if America fights another war.
  932. We can't be a part of
    sending them to their deaths.
  933. One call.
  934. - What?
    - One call.
  935. I'll make one call and that's it.
  936. Sit down.
  937. General Partridge, you've read
    today's Washington Post?
  938. - I have.
    - And seen the story,
  939. attributed to a highly placed Pentagon source?
  940. Yes, and I am as distressed as you that
    anyone in the Pentagon would stoop so low.
  941. Leaks within the Pentagon
    are how I get most of my information.
  942. Are you suggesting that
    the Pentagon is less than forthcoming?
  943. Then perhaps you can explain
    why I have to learn from the press
  944. that the man in charge
    of testing the Bradley has been fired?
  945. - He wasn't fired, sir, he was reassigned.
    - By whom?
  946. By General De Grasso,
    his commanding officer.
  947. I'm as shocked as you are.
  948. I guess there was some confusion
    between the Army, the Air Force...
  949. The sort of trouble you always get
  950. with these cross-departmental
    joint-testing programmes.
  951. (Phone)
  952. - Yes.
    - Congressman Stratton is on the phone.
  953. Sam, what can I do for you?
  954. What article? Oh, that article.
  955. No, completely untrue, inter-office SNAFU.
  956. File it under creative journalism.
  957. I'm looking into it now,
    you'll be the first to know. Right. Right.
  958. My best to Ellen.
  959. General, I want a full update on the Bradley
  960. - and I want it in writing.
    - Right away, sir.
  961. That is the last call
    I expect to receive on this matter
  962. from Congressman Stratton
    or anyone else on the Hill.
  963. Do I make myself clear, General?
  964. Perfectly.
  965. (Knock at door)
  966. Colonel Burton, I want you to write
    your report on the Bradley.
  967. Sir? I was under the impression
    that my job had...
  968. Your job has been reinstated.
  969. I want your report on my desk
    by 1800 hours tomorrow.
  970. - Yes, sir.
    - Colonel, in case you are unaware,
  971. as per the military manual, you will deliver
    your report to me and to me alone.
  972. Should a single copy be made public,
    I will charge you with
  973. subversion of military procedure
    and have you court-martialled.
  974. Stop packing, we're staying.
  975. - How'd you do that?
    - I didn't do anything.
  976. - Do we have a rule book?
    - A rule book, sir?
  977. - A book with rules in it.
    - What do you need a rule book for?
  978. To play by the rules,
    cos I always play by the rules.
  979. Then why do you need a rule book
    to tell you what the rules are?
  980. I need a rule book to tell me which rules I...
    Just get me the book.
  981. You need anything else, sir?
    Chinese food, No-Doz?
  982. No, thank you, Sergeant, I'm fine.
  983. Well, then, night, sir.
  984. What sounds better?
  985. "The Bradley has so far
    failed virtually every test"
  986. or "The testing program of the Bradley
  987. "has been without any coherent standards"?
  988. They both sound like something
    the General wouldn't want in his report.
  989. This is not just a report,
    it's a deadly weapon.
  990. Sir, an M-16 is a deadly weapon.
  991. A report is just a pile of paper,
  992. unless you plan to inflict
    a lot of extremely vicious paper cuts.
  993. Go home, Sergeant.
  994. Good night, sir.
  995. "The failure of the Bradley to incorporate
    even the most elementary safeguards
  996. "to protect the troops inside
    raises questions about the integrity."
  997. "The manner in which
    the vaporifics tests were carried out
  998. "suggests either negligence
    or a failure in the chain of command."
  999. "Had any troops been inside the vehicle,
    as it is currently configured,
  1000. "they would have been killed
    by toxic fumes, flames
  1001. "or by the overpressure created
    by the expanding gas in the compartment."
  1002. "And as a result
    of manifest deficiencies in every area,
  1003. "this office..."
  1004. "As a result of manifest deficiencies, this
    office is advising the immediate necessity
  1005. "of live fire-testing under combat conditions"!
  1006. - Rewrite it!
    - Sir?
  1007. Rewrite the fucking piece of garbage
    so it smells like a rose!
  1008. Jesus Christ!
  1009. "The Bradley test standards
  1010. "have been consistently altered
  1011. "in extreme ways.
  1012. "The Bradley tests have been
    extremely consistent.
  1013. "They have altered
  1014. "the standards
  1015. "for testing.
  1016. "Test after test has revealed
    design flaws in the Bradley.
  1017. "The marginalised optimal performance data..."
  1018. "The marginalised optimal performance data
  1019. "suggests no vaporific shift at this time."
  1020. Ha-ha-ha! That's brilliant, Lieutenant,
    that's abso-fucking-lutely brilliant.
  1021. Thank you, sir.
  1022. - But, sir...
    - What?
  1023. What does it mean?
  1024. What do you mean, what does it mean?
    You wrote it.
  1025. - Afternoon, sir.
    - Good afternoon.
  1026. "The Bradley tests have been
    extremely consistent."
  1027. This thing is exactly the opposite
    of what you wrote.
  1028. How can they do that?
  1029. They're playing by the book, Sergeant,
  1030. and so am I.
  1031. Paper cuts...
  1032. vicious paper cuts.
  1033. "The characterisation in your report
    is at best a serious misunderstanding
  1034. "of the testing procedures
    on a vehicle as flawed as the Bradley.
  1035. "As noted in my original report,
    the integrity..."
  1036. Jesus Christ! Who did this fucking thing go to?
  1037. The distribution page listed 198 names.
  1038. Court-martial the son of a bitch!
    Lock him up now!
  1039. - We can't.
    - We sure as hell can!
  1040. Burton's report was classified,
    it was sent to you,
  1041. you revised it and sent it back to him.
  1042. He wrote a memo on your revision
  1043. which can be sent to anyone
    remotely involved with the Bradley.
  1044. In this case, 198 people.
  1045. I will fucking kill him.
  1046. I will fillet him, draw and quarter him,
    stick his head in a vice.
  1047. We can't touch him, sir. It's by the book.
  1048. Then you find something in that book
    that'll help me fry the son of a bitch!
  1049. What?
  1050. Sir, the Washington Post is on the phone.
  1051. That was fast. Leaks don't usually
    get to them till after lunch.
  1052. Yes. No, we cannot comment
    on that right now.
  1053. Yes?
  1054. No, he cannot comment on that.
  1055. I'm sorry, but under military rules,
    I'm unable to comment.
  1056. I... I can't comment.
  1057. No. No, no comment.
  1058. Sorry, goodbye.
  1059. I'm getting lockjaw from not saying anything.
  1060. (Phone)
  1061. Burton.
  1062. I... I can't comment.
  1063. Is there anything I can comment on?
  1064. Well, yes.
  1065. I've just received orders
    that I am to report for duty in... Alaska.
  1066. Alaska is a prestige posting, Senator.
  1067. (Chuckles) No, no, no,
    I assure you that memo of his
  1068. had nothing to do with his being transferred.
  1069. Senator, I'm sorry, I've just been informed
    Secretary Weinberger is on the other line.
  1070. I'll get right back to you.
    I promise, thank you.
  1071. Sir, Weinberger is on two,
    line one is the Times.
  1072. Three is the Wall Street Journal,
    four is Newsweek,
  1073. line five is the House
    Armed Services Committee.
  1074. What do they want?
  1075. Hearings, sir. On the Bradley.
  1076. (Shouting)
  1077. (Shouting)
  1078. (Gavel bangs)
  1079. Alaska?
  1080. - What?
    - I said Alaska, General.
  1081. As I said in my opening remarks,
    Madam Chairman,
  1082. a lot of things have to come together
    to create teamwork.
  1083. - Good old-fashioned teamwork.
    - Yes, you told us, General.
  1084. And Colonel Burton's not a team player,
  1085. he's a rogue operator.
  1086. I'm not a name-caller, Madam Chairman.
  1087. But if you wish to make that connection,
    that would be your choice, not mine.
  1088. Did you ever say to Colonel Burton
  1089. "If I get one more call from the Hill
    about your, uh, expletive deleted, reports,
  1090. "you'll be sitting on your brains"?
  1091. - Does that sound like me, sir?
    - Answer the question, General, please.
  1092. I don't remember saying it.
    Not that I wasn't provoked.
  1093. Two witnesses testified that you said
    those words to Colonel Burton
  1094. outside the Pentagon pharmacy.
  1095. I have visited the pharmacy.
  1096. Quite a bit lately for antacids.
  1097. (Laughter)
  1098. But I would never say
    anything like that to anyone.
  1099. Let alone a fellow officer.
  1100. But what about your antagonism
    towards Colonel Burton?
  1101. It's his report that I don't approve of.
  1102. Colonel Burton's report is fallacious,
    misinformed, and accusatory.
  1103. And I have no use for an officer who is
    more interested in grabbing headlines
  1104. than he is in defending this country.
  1105. I thought he was in Anchorage.
  1106. Madam Chairman, Colonel Burton's here.
  1107. The committee would like to call as witness
  1108. Colonel James G Burton,
    United States Air Force.
  1109. - Madam Chairman.
    - Yes, General?
  1110. Under the rules of military conduct,
    no man can appear at these hearings
  1111. without the express order
    of his commanding officer.
  1112. Unfortunately, General De Grasso
    is on a tour in Germany.
  1113. General De Grasso has not ordered
    Colonel Burton to testify.
  1114. You're quite right, but as Colonel Burton
    has been transferred to Alaska,
  1115. he's no longer under
    General De Grasso's command.
  1116. Am I correct?
  1117. (Chairman) Do you swear to tell the truth,
    the whole truth and nothing but the truth
  1118. - so help you God?
    - I do.
  1119. Looks like you've stirred up
    a hornet's nest, Colonel.
  1120. It was never my intention, ma'am.
  1121. What was your intention?
  1122. Simply to do the job I was assigned to do.
  1123. (Burton) The Army test reports do not make
    the possibility of casualties a top priority.
  1124. In fact, General Partridge's
    report on the Bradley
  1125. doesn't even mention the word casualty,
  1126. not once.
  1127. I came to the conclusion that
    what was required was a live-fire test.
  1128. I requested such a test, repeatedly.
  1129. - Did you get that test?
    - No, ma'am, I did not.
  1130. Why not?
  1131. I wanted more realism than Army testing
    was accustomed to providing.
  1132. - You want realism?
    - (Gavel bangs)
  1133. General, you are out of order!
  1134. Madam Chairman, in the interest
    of resolving some of these issues,
  1135. I'd like to say something.
  1136. Please be brief, General.
  1137. Of course.
  1138. Colonel Burton wants more realism,
    so let's talk about the real world.
  1139. The real world has enemies in it.
  1140. There are forces at work,
    even now as we speak
  1141. with one objective in mind -
    the destruction of this country.
  1142. We must not, we will not
    allow those forces to prevail,
  1143. for if we do,
    you can be certain that you and I,
  1144. and everyone else
    will never again enjoy the luxury
  1145. of meeting in this building
    to debate anything!
  1146. As I said at the outset,
    we are in the business of winning.
  1147. That takes teamwork.
  1148. General, the teamwork you so prize,
    I take it it was in full force
  1149. during the development of the Bradley?
  1150. Textbook!
  1151. Perhaps you'd like to tell us
    how much has been spent so far
  1152. to develop the Bradley?
  1153. How much?
  1154. Well, you have the figures, don't you?
  1155. Of course.
  1156. 14.
  1157. - More or less.
    - 14.
  1158. - 14.
    - Million?
  1159. Bill... ion.
  1160. What did you say, General?
  1161. Billion.
  1162. (Shocked murmuring)
  1163. Billion... with a B?
  1164. With a B.
  1165. $14 billion for designing
    one armoured vehicle?
  1166. That's one way of looking at it.
  1167. Of taxpayers' money.
  1168. We are all taxpayers, after all.
    We're in this together.
  1169. General, how many years
    has this programme been running?
  1170. Bear with me, just a moment.
  1171. Um... er...
  1172. Let me... Ah.
  1173. Let's see. 12, 15...
  1174. - 17.
    - What?
  1175. 17.
  1176. Which is evidence...
  1177. of the enormous care my team takes
  1178. in the development of every weapons system
    undertaken by the Pentagon.
  1179. Hm.
  1180. 17 years.
  1181. $14 billion of the taxpayers' money.
  1182. General, I think it's time
    the American public
  1183. gets the live-fire test
    that Colonel Burton wants.
  1184. - Tomorrow's the big day, sir.
    - Uh-huh.
  1185. I'll tell you one thing.
  1186. Every damn one of these nuts and bolts
    has been taken off and put back on again.
  1187. This wouldn't be flame retardant, would it?
  1188. You think they made the men
    trick this whole thing up?
  1189. It wouldn't surprise me.
  1190. Not a bit.
  1191. Room, attention.
  1192. At ease, gentlemen.
  1193. Looks like you've been working hard.
  1194. - Corporal.
    - Sir?
  1195. Let me have one of those M-16s.
  1196. I wanna tell you a story.
  1197. You got a problem with that, Sergeant?
  1198. No, sir.
  1199. About a year ago,
    I went to the veterans' hospital
  1200. to visit a friend of mine
    from my flying days.
  1201. Only I took a wrong turn
    when I got off the elevator.
  1202. Now, when I look back on it,
  1203. I think I was meant to go down that corridor.
  1204. Cos that's where I met Phil.
  1205. Thank you, Corporal.
  1206. - But, sir...
    - Let me finish, Dalton.
  1207. I want to pass on something
    I learned about the M-16 from Phil.
  1208. You all know the M-16 better than I do.
  1209. A lot of you used it in Vietnam.
    But you were lucky.
  1210. In the early days of that war,
  1211. they sent guys off to fight
    with M-16s that jammed in combat.
  1212. A little bit of dust, a little bit of rain,
    and the gun was useless.
  1213. Maybe those early M-16s
    weren't tested properly.
  1214. Maybe somebody somewhere
    was more worried
  1215. about a production schedule or a promotion
  1216. than he was about those grunts
    in some faraway jungle,
  1217. who might end up with
    their stomachs in their hands.
  1218. But you don't know anyone
    that happened to, do you?
  1219. No. I'm sure not.
  1220. Otherwise you'd be out there right now
  1221. making sure that that Bradley
    is exactly - and I mean exactly -
  1222. the way it would be
    under normal combat conditions.
  1223. With some of your buddies
    riding inside, guys like Phil.
  1224. Only Phil has been in a coma
    for the last 20 years.
  1225. Since the day his M-16 jammed
    somewhere outside of Vinh Long.
  1226. But hell, you don't know the guy.
  1227. Or anybody like him.
  1228. Right?
  1229. (Subdued chatter)
  1230. (Chatter)
  1231. Sir?
  1232. Over here!
  1233. - General!
    - Good morning, sir.
  1234. - Everything all right?
    - Fine, sir, just fine.
  1235. Keep coming. Keep coming. Keep coming.
  1236. A little more. Keep coming. Keep coming.
  1237. - Sergeant.
    - Sir.
  1238. - Everything all right, Sergeant?
    - Fine, sir.
  1239. - Thank you.
    - Welcome, sir.
  1240. Welcome, Sergeant.
  1241. Jeez. Looks like some party.
  1242. Ladies and gentlemen, please be seated.
  1243. Thank you.
  1244. Ladies and gentlemen,
    distinguished members of Congress.
  1245. I think it's fair to say that
    you'll be seeing enough from this test
  1246. to give you the basis once and for all
    to form your own conclusion
  1247. about the sort of systemic excellence
    we've been pursuing.
  1248. I will be giving the signal shortly.
  1249. When I do, I want you
    to visualise combat conditions.
  1250. Imagine that the men firing that round
    are the enemy.
  1251. And that the Bradley,
    I don't have to tell you...
  1252. the Bradley is on our side.
  1253. Ladies and gentlemen,
    distinguished members of Congress,
  1254. I give you your Bradley fighting vehicle.
  1255. (Applause and cheering)
  1256. (* Brass band plays)
  1257. (Whistling)
  1258. Can you believe this?
  1259. (Cheering)
  1260. Sergeant.
  1261. Everything's gonna go as planned, isn't it?
  1262. It will go exactly as it should, sir.
  1263. As planned, right?
  1264. Corporal, this is Sergeant Dalton.
  1265. Move the vehicle about five yards forward
    and then clear out. Over.
  1266. Roger that.
  1267. (Partridge) For your further edification,
    the Bradley can be fired accurately...
  1268. How much fuel is in those tanks, Sergeant?
    Just enough to do those manoeuvres?
  1269. No more than it would have
    if it was in combat, sir.
  1270. (Partridge) Seven TOW missiles fired
    from a launcher mounted on the left side...
  1271. - And the ammunition inside the Bradley?
    - Up to spec, sir.
  1272. - Whose specs?
    - (Partridge) Manoeuvrable,
  1273. - and capable of keeping pace with...
    - No! No!
  1274. (Partridge) Carrying infantry troops
    needed to support tank operations,
  1275. more than we have in the test conditions.
  1276. And the hour is at hand.
  1277. All eyes front on the Bradley fighting vehicle.
  1278. The vehicle that will carry our boys to victory
    for many, many years to come.
  1279. Backblast area clear!
  1280. Fire!
  1281. (Shouts and screams)
  1282. Who's the best, baby?
  1283. Dalton, Granger!
  1284. - Sir.
    - Sir.
  1285. Could you explain, please?
  1286. We tried to tell you, sir.
  1287. You see, sir, when you gave us
    that speech last night
  1288. we had already fixed the vehicle
    back to the way it should be.
  1289. So you were...
  1290. - you were ahead of me.
    - I don't know about ahead,
  1291. but we've been behind you
    ever since you fried those mannequins.
  1292. And the sheep, sir. Man, that was epic!
  1293. (Laughter)
  1294. I'm sorry I made you listen
    to that lecture now, I...
  1295. Sir, you have nothing to apologise for, sir.
  1296. We had you figured wrong.
  1297. The men come first with you,
    and you proved that.
  1298. It was a hell of a good speech though, sir.
  1299. Any time you want to give another one,
    you know where to find us.
  1300. Thank you, men. Thank you, all.
  1301. Sir.
  1302. * America
  1303. * America
  1304. * America
  1305. * In America
  1306. * Oh beautiful for spacious skies
  1307. * For amber waves of grain
  1308. * Oh purple mountain
  1309. * Majesties
  1310. * Above the fruited plain
  1311. * America
  1312. * America
  1313. * God shed His grace
  1314. * On thee
  1315. * He shed his grace on thee
  1316. * And crown thy good
  1317. * With brotherhood
  1318. * From sea
  1319. * To shining
  1320. * Shining
  1321. * Sea
  1322. * America *
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