Black in Bend: being an extreme minority in suburbia | Anyssa Bohanan | TEDxBend
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0:15 - 0:16Hi, guys.
-
0:16 - 0:18(Audience) Hi.
-
0:18 - 0:21Hi, Oprah, if you're watching.
This is my only time for a shout-out. -
0:21 - 0:22But back to you guys ...
-
0:22 - 0:26So, here in the audience,
I know there are some parents, right? -
0:26 - 0:28Out of those of you who have kids,
-
0:28 - 0:31how many of you have had
"the talk" with them? -
0:32 - 0:34Right? Right?
-
0:34 - 0:37It's weird, right? And it's awkward.
-
0:37 - 0:38And I can guarantee you,
-
0:38 - 0:41as someone who was once a child
who received this talk, -
0:41 - 0:44it is just as awkward for us,
if not more so, than you. -
0:45 - 0:48So I got that talk
when I was about eight or nine, -
0:48 - 0:50and it was weird, guaranteed.
-
0:50 - 0:52But when I was about 9 or 10 -
-
0:52 - 0:54that's me -
-
0:54 - 0:57I had an entirely different talk
with my parents. -
0:57 - 1:02And I'm not really sure how they decided
that this was the day to have this talk, -
1:02 - 1:04but one Sunday afternoon,
-
1:04 - 1:06my dad said, "I have
something to show you, -
1:06 - 1:09and afterwards,
we're going to talk about it." -
1:09 - 1:13And then, he cued up
a History Channel documentary, -
1:13 - 1:15and he said, "I don't want
to hurt your feelings, -
1:15 - 1:17and I know that this might scare you,
-
1:17 - 1:20but it's very important for you to hear."
-
1:20 - 1:22So he cues up this
History Channel documentary, -
1:22 - 1:28and the first images that I see
are a very worked-up group of KKK members, -
1:28 - 1:32and then shortly after that,
black men hanging from a tree. -
1:33 - 1:34Now,
-
1:35 - 1:39he didn't make me watch the whole thing,
because I was a very sensitive child. -
1:39 - 1:41But this talk that I had with my dad
-
1:41 - 1:46is one that many black children in America
have to have at least once in their lives, -
1:46 - 1:51about the discrimination and racism
that they are likely to face at some point -
1:51 - 1:52because they are black.
-
1:53 - 1:56And my dad said,
"I don't mean to scare you, -
1:56 - 1:59but I just want you to know that someday,
-
1:59 - 2:03someone might want to hurt you
or even kill you because of who you are." -
2:04 - 2:06And I remember going
to my bedroom afterwards -
2:06 - 2:08and laying on the bed
-
2:08 - 2:10and staring at the ceiling and saying,
-
2:10 - 2:12"Why do they hate us?"
-
2:13 - 2:20Imagine that little girl wondering
why people didn't like her already, -
2:20 - 2:22because of who she was.
-
2:23 - 2:25Now, despite the severity of the talk,
-
2:25 - 2:27when I went back to school on Monday,
-
2:27 - 2:29I was pretty resilient,
as most children are, -
2:29 - 2:31and I mentioned it to my friends,
-
2:31 - 2:35and I realized that
they were uncomfortable. -
2:35 - 2:37And I didn't realize until later
-
2:37 - 2:39that is was because some of my friends
-
2:39 - 2:43had not to have this particular kind
of talk with their parents -
2:43 - 2:46about somehow confronting someone
-
2:46 - 2:49who would one day
think that they were beneath them -
2:49 - 2:52or want to hurt them
because of who they were. -
2:53 - 2:56And after several other incidences
that were similar, -
2:56 - 2:59I just realized that
there were some groups -
2:59 - 3:02with whom I would not
be able to discuss race. -
3:02 - 3:03And so, in groups
-
3:03 - 3:08where even the differences between us
were glaringly obvious, -
3:08 - 3:09I would avoid the topic
-
3:09 - 3:12because I didn't want to make
other people uncomfortable. -
3:12 - 3:15Fast-forward a few years
from elementary school. -
3:15 - 3:16After I graduated from college,
-
3:16 - 3:20I decided to use my journalism degree
and teach English in South Korea. -
3:22 - 3:24It was an amazing experience,
-
3:24 - 3:30in part due to the fantastic people
that I met, from all corners of the world. -
3:30 - 3:32But moving across the world,
let me tell you, -
3:32 - 3:34can come with just a few challenges,
-
3:34 - 3:37as I'm sure you're aware.
-
3:37 - 3:40How many of you have ever been
the only one in a room, -
3:40 - 3:44the only one of your race,
of your gender, of your sexuality? -
3:45 - 3:47How does it feel?
-
3:48 - 3:51Some people are like,
"Yeah ... it's fine. I felt alright." -
3:51 - 3:54For some people, it makes you feel
incredibly vulnerable. -
3:55 - 4:00Now, imagine that feeling of discomfort
combined with your dad's far-echoing words -
4:00 - 4:05of someone maybe not liking you
simply because of who you are, -
4:05 - 4:07and take that feeling times a thousand
-
4:07 - 4:11because you're the only one that looks
like you pretty much in the whole country. -
4:11 - 4:12(Laughter)
-
4:15 - 4:16Oh, goodness.
-
4:17 - 4:20It was a fun time though, honestly.
-
4:20 - 4:24But I did feel like I was
under a microscope at all times. -
4:24 - 4:27I mean, I had some of the most
interesting experiences. -
4:27 - 4:29Like, I was going up the escalator
one day in e-mart, -
4:29 - 4:34and a man leaned so far over the railing
to get a closer look at me -
4:34 - 4:35I thought we were going to make out.
-
4:35 - 4:38I thought that that was it,
I had a new husband, you know. -
4:38 - 4:43And some of my students would
call me things like "Africa teacher," -
4:43 - 4:45or "Jamaica teacher,"
-
4:45 - 4:47which was easy enough to correct.
-
4:47 - 4:49They just simply didn't know.
-
4:50 - 4:52One time, I got into the taxi cab,
-
4:52 - 4:56and the taxi driver was just as shocked
to see me as pretty much anyone, -
4:56 - 5:02and after a frantic conversation
in rapid-fire Korean, -
5:02 - 5:06he was asking to take my hand.
-
5:06 - 5:09I thought, "In marriage?
What's going on here?" -
5:09 - 5:14But it turned out that he just wanted
to try to rub the brown off of it. -
5:14 - 5:15(Laughter)
-
5:15 - 5:19Yeah! Yeah, that happened! It was real.
-
5:19 - 5:21Now, that incident was
more amusing than anything, -
5:21 - 5:27and these experiences that I had
were more, you know, misunderstandings. -
5:27 - 5:32It wasn't like they were purposefully
trying to hurt me at all. -
5:32 - 5:33Which was fine.
-
5:33 - 5:39But there were other incidences
where the whole purpose was to hurt me. -
5:39 - 5:43So, I go down to Ulsan one weekend
to visit a couple of my friends. -
5:43 - 5:47Ulsan is this beautiful city
on the southern coast of South Korea, -
5:47 - 5:50and they're far more used
to seeing foreigners and tourists. -
5:50 - 5:54So I was really
looking forward to a weekend -
5:54 - 5:56where fewer people stared at me, at least.
-
5:57 - 6:00And my friends and I,
we go out and we have a great time, -
6:00 - 6:02and we end the day
in one of our favorite bars, -
6:02 - 6:06and all of a sudden, mid-conversation,
-
6:06 - 6:10my friend to the left of me freezes
like she has seen a ghost, -
6:10 - 6:13like someone has walked over her grave.
-
6:13 - 6:18And she turns to the three
Korean men sitting next to her -
6:18 - 6:20and starts yelling at them!
-
6:21 - 6:23"What? What is going on?"
-
6:24 - 6:26So, of course my friend and I
are concerned. -
6:26 - 6:28Maybe they've said
something inappropriate to her. -
6:28 - 6:30I'm kind of ready
to throw down a little bit. -
6:30 - 6:33I mean, I'm small but mighty!
Like, I'm ready to go! -
6:33 - 6:34(Laughter)
-
6:34 - 6:35And instead,
-
6:36 - 6:40she turns to me and she says,
with tears in her eyes, -
6:40 - 6:43"They just called you a 'dumb nigger.'"
-
6:44 - 6:45Yikes.
-
6:46 - 6:49My other friend's reaction turns visceral.
-
6:49 - 6:53Now she's yelling at them,
now the bartenders are involved. -
6:53 - 6:56The guys are frantically
trying to explain, -
6:56 - 6:58but it's just because they've been caught.
-
6:58 - 7:02My friend who originally heard it
has run to the bathroom, crying, -
7:02 - 7:03because she's so angry.
-
7:03 - 7:04But you know what?
-
7:05 - 7:08In all of the chaos,
once I realized that that was the issue, -
7:09 - 7:12I got very calm
-
7:12 - 7:16because this is exactly what I had been
fearing since I was 10 years old, -
7:16 - 7:18watching a documentary
-
7:18 - 7:23about the fact that someone might say
exactly what this man had just said to me, -
7:24 - 7:25and I survived!
-
7:26 - 7:29I always thought
that such a blatant racist event -
7:29 - 7:32would feel like a knife through my chest.
-
7:33 - 7:36And instead, it felt
more like a paper cut - -
7:36 - 7:38quick sting,
-
7:38 - 7:39little scar,
-
7:39 - 7:43a reminder that this was not the worst
that I would ever hear, -
7:43 - 7:45but that I would survive.
-
7:46 - 7:49Now, not every part of my life
in South Korea was this dramatic. -
7:49 - 7:51I'm just telling you guys
the craziest parts. -
7:51 - 7:54Honestly, it was the greatest
experience ever. -
7:54 - 7:59It really made me a stronger,
more confident and resilient person. -
8:00 - 8:01And that newfound confidence
-
8:01 - 8:04is probably why three months
after I moved back home -
8:04 - 8:07and I got offered the job here in Bend,
-
8:07 - 8:10I lapped at the opportunity.
-
8:10 - 8:13It sounded like my dream job
to be a storyteller, -
8:13 - 8:15and not just a news reporter.
-
8:15 - 8:18And when I talked
to my now boss on the phone, -
8:18 - 8:22he informed me that Bend
was not very diverse ... -
8:22 - 8:23(Laughter)
-
8:23 - 8:25And by "not very diverse,"
-
8:25 - 8:29he meant that there were
a lot of white people! -
8:29 - 8:30(Laughter)
-
8:30 - 8:31Which was fine!
-
8:31 - 8:35I said, "Well, you know, I moved
to an entirely different country." -
8:35 - 8:38What was moving
to an entirely different state? -
8:39 - 8:43The difference, ladies and gentlemen,
is that, by moving to South Korea, -
8:43 - 8:48I had other people around me who
recognized that feeling of outsiderness, -
8:48 - 8:50of feeling like a foreigner.
-
8:50 - 8:55And here in Bend, I didn't
really have that relatability, -
8:55 - 8:59and I was experiencing
all of this in the public eye. -
9:00 - 9:03You see, journalists are not
really allowed to have a public opinion. -
9:03 - 9:06We are unbiased figures of the community,
-
9:06 - 9:08something that I've struggled with
on certain topics, -
9:08 - 9:10but, for the most part, I understand,
-
9:10 - 9:13because this is all
that I ever wanted to do, -
9:13 - 9:14and it's part of the job.
-
9:15 - 9:20But being the only one who looks like me
on TV can pose unique challenges, -
9:21 - 9:26and I find myself putting myself
into two categories quite often: -
9:26 - 9:30Anyssa the journalist
and Anyssa the black chick. -
9:31 - 9:35Now, these two categories clashed
for the first time last summer, -
9:35 - 9:40the same week that Philando Castile
and Alton Stirling, two black men, -
9:40 - 9:42were shot and killed
in two separate states, -
9:42 - 9:46the same week that five police officers
were shot and killed in Dallas -
9:46 - 9:48in response to those shootings.
-
9:48 - 9:50It was a tough week to be an American,
-
9:50 - 9:54and it was certainly
a tough week to be in news. -
9:55 - 9:56But the morning that I woke up,
-
9:56 - 9:58two days after Alton Stirling
had been shot, -
9:58 - 10:04to see the fairly graphic video
of Philando Castile dying in his car, -
10:04 - 10:08I felt more exhausted than anything.
-
10:08 - 10:14And I watched a few minutes of the video
and got ready for work, -
10:15 - 10:17hopped in the car,
-
10:17 - 10:18got ready to drive out,
-
10:18 - 10:22and I got about 10 feet
down the road, if that, -
10:22 - 10:25before I burst into tears.
-
10:25 - 10:29And it's still very hard for me
to talk about without getting emotional, -
10:29 - 10:32because these men are people
that I could have known. -
10:32 - 10:38They could have been friends, family,
co-workers that I'd had in the past. -
10:38 - 10:42And when I got to work
and no one was talking about it, -
10:43 - 10:46I've never felt so alone.
-
10:47 - 10:51I felt like it didn't matter,
what had happened to these men. -
10:51 - 10:53I felt like I didn't matter,
-
10:53 - 10:55and no one even noticed.
-
10:56 - 10:58So after our morning meeting,
-
10:58 - 11:02I asked our producer
why we weren't covering the shootings, -
11:02 - 11:05and he said that we needed
to find a way to localize it. -
11:05 - 11:06Fair enough.
-
11:06 - 11:09So he suggested that we do
man-on-the-street interviews, -
11:09 - 11:14and I wasn't that excited about it,
but I figured, "Alright, here we go." -
11:14 - 11:16So my videographer and I go downtown,
-
11:16 - 11:19and not many people
were willing to talk about it. -
11:19 - 11:21You know, unpleasantness
just doesn't belong -
11:21 - 11:24on a sunny summer day in Bend.
-
11:24 - 11:28But we did get a couple
who gave us a very modest opinion, -
11:28 - 11:30and I was feeling pretty good about myself
-
11:30 - 11:33because I didn't think
we were going to get anything. -
11:33 - 11:36So we were just talking about
packing it in and getting ready to go, -
11:36 - 11:39when a man rolled up on his bike:
-
11:39 - 11:44white man, mid-40s or so, very Bendite,
-
11:44 - 11:46and he asked what we were doing.
-
11:46 - 11:48So, we told him:
-
11:48 - 11:51we were getting opinions
on the shootings that had happened. -
11:51 - 11:55And he said, "I have opinions,
but I don't want to say them on camera." -
11:55 - 11:58And we repeatedly asked him,
"Are you sure? Are you sure?" -
11:58 - 12:01Because, you know,
he wasn't going anywhere. -
12:01 - 12:03He definitely wanted to share his opinion.
-
12:03 - 12:06And before we could get him convinced
-
12:06 - 12:09that maybe he should just tell us
while the camera was rolling, -
12:09 - 12:15he launches into this long opinion
about everyone from Muslims to immigrants, -
12:15 - 12:17and then he tops it off by saying,
-
12:17 - 12:19"I hate to say this,
because you're black ..." -
12:19 - 12:22Let's just stop right there
for a little mini lesson: -
12:22 - 12:24no good sentence ever ...
-
12:24 - 12:27(Laughter)
-
12:27 - 12:30starts with "I hate to be racist, but ..."
-
12:30 - 12:32(Laughter)
-
12:32 - 12:35So, he says,
-
12:35 - 12:37"I hate to say this, because you're black,
-
12:37 - 12:40but you guys are just built,
stronger and faster, -
12:40 - 12:42and sometimes police
have no choice but to shoot, -
12:42 - 12:43because they're afraid."
-
12:43 - 12:45(Audience) Aww ...
-
12:45 - 12:48"And black people
are more violent, statistically. -
12:48 - 12:50You can look it up."
-
12:51 - 12:54I go completely numb.
-
12:54 - 12:56I cannot believe
he has just said this to me. -
12:56 - 13:02And he said this to me on a sunny day,
in the middle of downtown Bend, -
13:02 - 13:06as placidly as if he was telling me
the sky was blue. -
13:07 - 13:10That was a knife.
-
13:14 - 13:16So,
-
13:16 - 13:18now that you guys have heard that,
-
13:19 - 13:25a few weeks ago, we aired a story
about me telling this exact same story, -
13:25 - 13:28and the backlash and comments
were startling. -
13:29 - 13:32A lot of people were upset
-
13:32 - 13:36over the fact that "I had made
everyone in Bend look racist" -
13:36 - 13:38and said that they would never
watch our show again. -
13:39 - 13:41Others suggested
that if I wanted diversity, -
13:41 - 13:43I should just move!
-
13:45 - 13:50And then, of course, there's the infamous
"five black people in Bend" comment. -
13:50 - 13:52If there's anything I could take back,
-
13:52 - 13:53it would be that.
-
13:53 - 13:56I've just recently said
that there were five of us in Bend, -
13:56 - 13:59and people countered with,
-
13:59 - 14:01"I know at least 12
black people here in Bend." -
14:01 - 14:02(Laughter)
-
14:02 - 14:04"13, even!"
-
14:04 - 14:05(Laughter)
-
14:08 - 14:12And to them I say,
"I think you missed the point," -
14:13 - 14:16and also kind of made mine.
-
14:17 - 14:20Because it doesn't matter
that you know 12 black people, -
14:20 - 14:24or 13 or 25 black people in Bend.
-
14:24 - 14:27The fact that you can count us at all
in a city of literally thousands -
14:27 - 14:29should give you pause.
-
14:29 - 14:31I wasn't looking to give
a Census Bureau count -
14:31 - 14:34or call everyone in the area racist.
-
14:34 - 14:36My point remains
-
14:36 - 14:40that we've got to find a way
to comfortably talk about race. -
14:40 - 14:45As soon as I mentioned it,
it was attack mode, defensive. -
14:47 - 14:51See, so often, people want to shy away
from the fact that I'm black. -
14:51 - 14:55My least favorite phrase
is "I don't see color." -
14:56 - 14:59And I get that you mean
that you see us as equals, -
14:59 - 15:02but why can't you see me
as your equal and black? -
15:03 - 15:06I would never say,
"I don't see you as white." -
15:06 - 15:09(Laughter)
-
15:12 - 15:15(Applause)
-
15:19 - 15:22See, you should acknowledge that I'm black
because I'm okay with it. -
15:22 - 15:26I want you to know
that I am a professional woman -
15:26 - 15:28and I am black.
-
15:28 - 15:30And I also want you to know
-
15:30 - 15:33that even though there may be
more than five of us, -
15:33 - 15:38sometimes I feel like the only one
in a sea of literally thousands, -
15:38 - 15:41and that can be a real
challenge, and exhausting, -
15:41 - 15:45on days when I'm already
not having the greatest time. -
15:46 - 15:48I want you to know
that living here in Bend -
15:48 - 15:52can be just as amazing
as it was living in South Korea, -
15:52 - 15:56but it's also scary
when I'm walking down the street -
15:56 - 15:59and I wonder who is walking past me
-
15:59 - 16:04that's thinking the exact same thing
that that man once said to me. -
16:05 - 16:08I don't want to leave you
with oversimplified generalizations -
16:08 - 16:12like "all black people feel victimized,"
or "all white people are racist." -
16:12 - 16:17But in a community like Bend,
where the majority is white, -
16:17 - 16:20I want to know: How can we learn together?
-
16:20 - 16:23How can we hope to create
a better community -
16:23 - 16:27if we never see each other's differences,
but only our sameness? -
16:27 - 16:32If we take on each other's differences
and see each other more fully, -
16:32 - 16:36think about how much better we can make
not just Bend, but the world. -
16:36 - 16:37Thank you.
-
16:37 - 16:40(Applause) (Cheering)
- Title:
- Black in Bend: being an extreme minority in suburbia | Anyssa Bohanan | TEDxBend
- Description:
-
Have you ever been the only one who looks like you in a room? Anyssa Bohanan has experienced the feeling on an extreme level, first living as one of the only African Americans in South Korea, and then as one of very few in Central Oregon. Her experiences being an extreme minority both at home and abroad range from amusing to life changing. She hopes that by sharing those experiences she can make the difference for at least one other person feeling the same way.
Local news reporter, Anyssa Bohanan, is a self-proclaimed “Future Oprah.” In fact, she’s been interviewing her teddy bears since she was a toddler and attributes the fact that she can talk to anyone, anywhere, to growing up as an Army Brat. A two-year stint teaching English in South Korea taught Bohanan the true importance of escaping your comfort zone. From navigating the streets of a whole new country, to a journey of self-discovery in unfamiliar territory right here at home, she’s learning that being different doesn’t have to be a bad thing, no matter where you are.
This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at https://www.ted.com/tedx
- Video Language:
- English
- Team:
- closed TED
- Project:
- TEDxTalks
- Duration:
- 17:06
Leonardo Silva edited English subtitles for Black in Bend: being an extreme minority in suburbia | Anyssa Bohanan | TEDxBend | ||
Leonardo Silva approved English subtitles for Black in Bend: being an extreme minority in suburbia | Anyssa Bohanan | TEDxBend | ||
Amanda Chu accepted English subtitles for Black in Bend: being an extreme minority in suburbia | Anyssa Bohanan | TEDxBend | ||
Amanda Chu edited English subtitles for Black in Bend: being an extreme minority in suburbia | Anyssa Bohanan | TEDxBend | ||
Amanda Chu edited English subtitles for Black in Bend: being an extreme minority in suburbia | Anyssa Bohanan | TEDxBend | ||
Leonardo Silva edited English subtitles for Black in Bend: being an extreme minority in suburbia | Anyssa Bohanan | TEDxBend | ||
Leonardo Silva edited English subtitles for Black in Bend: being an extreme minority in suburbia | Anyssa Bohanan | TEDxBend | ||
Leonardo Silva edited English subtitles for Black in Bend: being an extreme minority in suburbia | Anyssa Bohanan | TEDxBend |