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TEDxFlandersSalon - Sadettin Kirmiziyuz - The Hajj, a holy road story

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    Good evening, ladies and gentlemen.
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    My name is Sadettin Kirmiziyüz.
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    I am an assimilated agnostic migrant son,
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    but my name, Sadettin,
    means "Joy of Faith".
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    I was asked to give a short report
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    on the pilgrimage to Mecca
    I conducted in 2010 with my father.
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    I have 18 minutes to do that.
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    I will try to make it.
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    I will take you through
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    the rituals you perform
    during this pilgrimage.
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    Where should I point?
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    You apply for the Hajj with
    the Hollanda Diyanet Vakfi.
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    For the Belgians: there's also
    a Belgica Diyanet Vakfi,
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    but I'll stick to the Dutch version.
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    It is a Dutch affiliated
    department of the Turkish
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    Presidency of Religious Affairs,
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    founded in 1923
    after Mustafa Kemal Atatürk
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    abrogated the caliphate.
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    The caliphate was the islamic pope.
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    You enlist here.
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    You pay 3,500 euro and you get
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    your airplane ticket, visum,
    4 weeks stay in a hotel
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    and this
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    Hajji bag.
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    This is a survival kit.
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    It contains all sorts of things:
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    practical information, pictures,
    backgrounds, slippers,
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    scentless soap, towels,
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    the Ihram -- the white garment you wear
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    when you are in the sacred state --
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    and this prayer book.
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    You keep it safe.
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    You get vaccinated against malaria,
    streptococcus, diphtheria, hepatitis,
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    meningitis -- hepatitis A, B, anything, polio,
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    you send your vaccination passport
    and your passport
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    to the Presidency of Religious Affairs
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    and you're done.
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    May God accept this pilgrimage
    and make it easy for you.
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    For muslims, the Hajj is the culmination
    of their religious life.
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    To celebrate this, at Schiphol airport,
    in my case,
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    thousands of happy family members
    say goodbye to hundreds of Hajji.
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    There is a joint prayer
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    to bless the journey,
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    and those who stay behind
    are solemnly promised
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    that they will be prayed for
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    at the house of God,
    Baitullah, the Ka'aba.
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    I was at Schiphol too,
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    where happy family members said goodbye
    to me and hundreds of Hajji.
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    Next to me stood my girlfriend,
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    from the Judeo-Christian civilisation.
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    As we are standing there,
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    the imam who will
    accompany us, starts to pray.
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    I say agnostic, yes I do,
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    but I understand very well
    that this is a serious endeavour.
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    So I raise my hands in prayer
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    and realise that my girlfriend, with whom
    I have been cohabiting for 7 years,
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    has never seen me praying
    in all those years.
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    Painful? Maybe.
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    Even more painful is the fact
    that the prayer I am supposed to join in,
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    is unknown to me.
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    So I playback. (Laughter)
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    In Istanbul we enter the state of Ihram.
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    The garment is called Ihram.
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    The sacred state has the same name.
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    This is a Hajji looking very much like me.
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    My father helped me into this.
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    There is no other way
    to put on the garment.
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    You can't do it alone,
    you help each other.
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    The belt I wear around my waist
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    needed an extra hole,
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    because according to my father
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    I am thin because I smoke.
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    So I had to pray in Mecca
    for Allah to help me quit smoking.
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    To which I responded,
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    "Oh, yes? Do you think
    Allah will help me quit? Really?"
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    He said blandly, "Of course.
    If you ask him, he helps you."
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    You tuck one cloth around your waist
    and one over your shoulder.
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    As of that moment, the restrictions
    of the sacred state apply.
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    The restrictions are:
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    no nail cuts, no haircuts, no shaving,
    no scratching wounds,
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    no use of scents, no swearing,
    no complaining, no fighting,
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    no underwear, no killing living beings
    and no sex.
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    That means no talking of sex,
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    no thinking of sex, (Laughter)
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    for four weeks. (Laughter)
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    Infringements of these restrictions
    require atonement,
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    spiritually and materially.
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    Think "small gift to the poor".
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    In the plane from Istanbul to Jedda --
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    I can't show you here,
    but Jedda is on the West Coast,
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    it says "Jiddah", near the Red See --
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    in that plane there is
    another joint prayer.
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    You use your folding table
    to rest your forehead
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    and as of that moment
    the Talbiyah can be intoned,
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    a special pilgrimage prayer.
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    Labbayk, Allahumma Labbayk!
    Labbayka La Shareeka laka labbayk!
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    Innal Hamda Wanni'mata.
    Laka Wal Mulka Laa Shareekalak
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    No Hajji in the room?
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    Freely translated, it means,
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    "Here I am, God, here I am,
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    as I was meant to be here.
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    Thine is the honor and the glory."
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    But when one Hajji intones
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    this Talbiyah, the others
    are supposed to join in.
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    So you may happen to be on the bus
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    from Jedda to Mecca,
    four and a half hour through the desert,
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    and you are slowly
    but soundly falling asleep,
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    and the Hajji behind you may start,
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    Labbayka Allhumma labbayk,
    labbayka la shareeka,
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    so you join in.
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    You need to get used to it,
    but believe me: you get used to anything.
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    Then we arrive in Mecca.
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    We go straight to
    the sacred part of the city.
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    You will not see Mecca itself
    during those four weeks.
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    This is a replica of the Big Ben.
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    They built it there.
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    My father pointed out to me that it says
    "Allah" in Arabic on the Big Ben.
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    He thought that was very beautiful.
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    You check into your hotel
    and as of that moment
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    you no longer enjoy double citizenship.
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    You are no longer a Belgian Moroccan
    or a Dutch Turk,
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    you are simply a Moroccan or a Turk.
    That's all.
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    Go on.
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    To the Masjid al-Haram,
    the holy mosque,
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    because that is where the Ka'aba is.
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    By the way, Ka'aba just means "cube".
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    What struck me immediately,
    was its architecture,
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    and I don't mean the number of minarets
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    or domes, or the beauty of the ornaments,
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    no, it was as if the architect
    had counted in
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    the suspense generated by a first look
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    at the Ka'aba.
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    Because first you have
    to walk around those walls.
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    That is a 500 to 600 meter walk.
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    But you know it is there,
    the Ka'aba. You feel it.
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    Outside, Hajji are praying,
    in that direction.
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    You get closer
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    until you reach Gate 11.
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    You take off your slippers,
    put them in a plastic bag,
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    put the bag in your backpack
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    and then -- astonishment
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    because I did not feel the way
    I thought I would feel.
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    Not that I didn't feel anything,
    no mistake.
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    It was different.
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    At home, in Amsterdam,
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    I listened a lot to Oum Kalsoum,
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    Fairuz, sufi music, Verdi's Requiem,
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    I put the volume up and thought,
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    yes, I will feel this, exactly this --
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    but I wasn't.
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    It was not what everybody said
    I would feel.
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    My father, on the bus
    to the Masjid al-Haram,
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    "The Ka'aba is a magnet
    and we are pieces of iron."
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    Or my mother, who couldn't speak of it
    without tears in her eyes,
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    or my aunts, who called it
    indescribable.
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    But astonishment too --
    because I make jokes, I laugh,
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    I say 'agnostic',
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    I flirt with atheism, maybe,
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    but there were times when I was different.
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    In every house I visited,
    when I was a child,
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    every family member had a picture --
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    maybe this picture.
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    I walk around, butterflies in my stomach,
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    in this white speckled human hurricane,
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    pumped around this black pulsating heart,
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    above me the moon and the stars,
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    Allah on the Big Ben,
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    and I feel the moon and the stars,
    God on the Big Ben,
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    and that black pulsating heart.
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    Here we perform the first real ritual:
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    the Tawaaf, the procession.
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    Like the planets around the Sun,
    the Moon around the Earth,
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    so does man revolve around God.
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    We go round seven times,
    anti clockwise.
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    We are reciting prayers
    from the prayer book,
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    a prayer for every round,
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    and after seven rounds
    we perform a special prayer
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    to close the Tawaaf. Masha Allah,
    congratulations, you performed the Tawaaf.
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    We go straight on.
    I have 9 minutes left.
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    We go to the next ritual, the Sa'i.
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    The Sa'i is a hike between to hilltops,
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    Seffa and Merveh, currently situated
    within the Masjid al-Haram resort.
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    It is a reconstruction.
    Everything is a reconstruction.
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    They are enacting a big theatre play.
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    It is a reconstruction of the story of
    Ibrahim, Abraham, Ibrahim --
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    whom God ordered to send his wife, Hagar,
    and their son Ismail into the wilderness.
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    They arrive at this spot, there, in Mecca.
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    She understands very well
    that they will not survive,
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    looks for water,
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    stands on the hilltop
    and puts down her baby,
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    because she lacks the force to carry it,
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    and walks to the other hilltop.
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    She arrives at a ravine
    she needs to bridge
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    in order to reach the hilltop.
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    So she climbs down,
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    and upon arrival at the bottom,
    she panics: she can't see the baby,
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    so she runs to the other side, climbs up,
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    looks, sees baby Ismail,
    nothing happened, thank God --
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    looks around, sees nothing, runs back,
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    through the ravine again, panic again,
    running to baby Ismail.
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    She does this seven times.
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    After seven times,
    she is about to give up,
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    when she finds God hasn't forgotten her.
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    An angel descends from heaven
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    and kicks a hole in the ground
    with the tip of his wing.
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    From that hole, pop!
    water, the Zamzam Well.
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    The part with the ravine
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    is now indicated with green lights.
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    When pilgrims pass a green lamp,
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    they are supposed to run
    to the next ravine.
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    It's a reconstruction.
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    The Zamzam Well still flows.
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    And what did the Saudi do?
    Very smart:
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    they connected the source
    to an intricate system
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    of pumps, tubes, and kettles,
    so that anywhere
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    in the enormous Masjid al-Haram resort,
    all day long,
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    you can drink Zamzam water.
    Delicious!
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    We go straight on.
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    We have ten days left to go to
    the Masjid al-Haram, as often as possible.
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    You do it at night.
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    It's too hot in daytime. It's 40° Celsius.
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    You rest during the day.
    We go at night.
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    We use the special shuttle buses
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    taking us to the Masjid.
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    You perform a Tawaaf, 2, 3, 4, 5,
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    but most of all: you pray
    as much as possible.
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    Pray, pray, pray, pray, pray.
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    Not on your knees, Dear Lord Jesus,
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    no, the Salat, physical exercise.
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    Because one prayer in the Masjid al-Haram,
    counts for a thousand.
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    In the four weeks
    that I was in Saudi Arabia,
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    I prayed 247 times, of which 120 times
    in the Masjid al-Haram.
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    Times thousand.
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    Not bad, for an assimilated
    agnostic migrant son, isn't it?
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    After ten days we go
    to the plain of Arafat.
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    Number four.
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    We officially become Hajji.
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    Mohamed gave his last sermon here,
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    and all pilgrims present in Saudi Arabia
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    gather on that plain.
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    5.5 million people.
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    We spend the night in tents,
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    men and women separated,
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    and it's hot, cramped,
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    and there's an exceptional
    amount of mosquitoes.
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    Which you are not allowed to kill.
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    You are not allowed to complain.
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    The next day, there's a prayer service
    lasting 5.5 hours.
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    God is honoured, praised,
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    hymns are sung,
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    and at the end of the prayer,
    you congratulate each other:
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    Masha Allah, you became Hajji.
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    But we are only half way through.
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    We move to number 5, Mozdalefah.
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    We collect pebbles
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    for what I think is
    the most spectacular part:
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    the stoning of the devil.
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    You collect 49 pebbles,
    each symbolizing a sin.
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    A bad quality.
    You will cast them off.
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    The stones cannot be
    smaller than a chickpea
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    nor bigger than a hazelnut.
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    I had collected 49 pebbles
    and was ready, at point 5,
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    to walk with my father to point 6, Mina,
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    where 3 giant pillars symbolize the devil.
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    We were waiting for --
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    Okay. The Saudi authorities,
    for some reason,
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    had decided that all 140,000 Turkish Hajji
    present at the time,
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    had to gather in an area that was hedged
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    with fences, the standard kind
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    that you see here as well.
    Heras-fences, I think.
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    This was -- this is about 4 meter.
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    Here was a gate that was closed.
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    We stood in front of that gate.
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    Along the area there was a road.
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    On that road there were buses
    full of pilgrims from other countries.
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    The road curved to the right,
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    so we waited to cross the road.
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    But it took a long time.
    Longer. And longer.
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    It was crowded. More crowded.
    Even more crowded.
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    A few hours earlier,
    we had run out of water.
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    But hey, this is a test. I am zen.
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    I am calm.
    I will not be upset.
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    As I lower my breath,
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    my father says,
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    "I really don't feel like doing this, man.
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    I'm not going to stand here, no way.
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    This will go wrong."
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    "Hey, dad, come on! We've come this far.
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    Let's stone the devil together."
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    "No, no, no way, no way.
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    Got your phone?" "Yes, yes."
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    "I will stand on a quiet spot.
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    As soon as you cross that gate,
    call me and we move on.
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    "Fine, okay."
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    He leaves the crowd
    and at that moment someone faints.
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    A lady. The lady had a tougher time,
    they were covered.
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    Someone faints over there,
    and there, and there.
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    Someone yells:
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    for heaven's sake, make room,
    she is dying.
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    Which caused the Hajji standing there
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    to yell that the damned fucking arabs
    needed to open the fucking gate
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    because he wanted
    value for his 3,500 euro.
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    Hajji, sabr, sabr,
    what are you doing, think, think!
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    A Hajji responds
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    that the son-of-such-and-such-woman
    needs to shut up
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    or else he'll smack
    the teeth out of his mouth.
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    As of that moment, things get hazy.
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    I know that suddenly
    I didn't feel the ground under my feet
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    and before my mind's eye I saw images
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    of '97, '98, 2000, 2001, 2004, 2006, 2008,
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    of Hajji with distorted
    limbs and bloody Ihrams,
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    and okay, I know I am a skinny guy,
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    but I have been in a mosh pit at a concert
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    so I know, mmmm!
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    I was surrounded
    by Turkish aunties, this high.
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    I don't know what happened to them.
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    I just know that suddenly
    I was at the other side
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    with stuff sticking to my legs.
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    Did I stand on someone?
    Did I fall? No idea.
  • 15:20 - 15:22
    I can only walk,
    so that I get the fuck out ...
  • 15:22 - 15:24
    I didn't think fuck! Really not!
  • 15:24 - 15:26
    Run, run, run.
    I ran like hell.
  • 15:26 - 15:32
    Because behind me on the road
    139,998 Turkish Hajji came up.
  • 15:32 - 15:34
    So I ran, I took my phone
  • 15:34 - 15:37
    and I swear, as if the devil had it's way,
  • 15:37 - 15:39
    battery empty.
  • 15:39 - 15:42
    I lose everyone, my father,
  • 15:42 - 15:43
    the other Dutch Hajji,
  • 15:43 - 15:46
    and I walk alone for hours, 7 kilometer,
  • 15:46 - 15:49
    lost, along dusty roads,
    looking for water.
  • 15:49 - 15:52
    I find a fountain
    with Zamzam water, finally,
  • 15:52 - 15:53
    I get there and think,
  • 15:53 - 15:57
    "I've been having inappropriate thoughts.
  • 15:57 - 15:58
    I will stone the devil.
  • 15:58 - 16:01
    I will cast off my bad qualities --
  • 16:01 - 16:04
    I have more than I can recount now,
    but I have little time --
  • 16:04 - 16:05
    I think, concentrate, Sadettin,
  • 16:05 - 16:07
    it is still possible.
  • 16:07 - 16:09
    I get a poach with the 49 stones.
  • 16:09 - 16:12
    I empty it in my hand.
  • 16:12 - 16:17
    From now on, never, really never --
  • 16:17 - 16:20
    and then all hell breaks loose around me.
  • 16:20 - 16:23
    To my left are 3 Iranian Hajji.
  • 16:23 - 16:25
    Long beards, turban.
  • 16:25 - 16:27
    I see slippers fly through the air.
  • 16:27 - 16:28
    A crutch flies by
  • 16:28 - 16:30
    and luckily, just before that,
  • 16:30 - 16:33
    I put on my face mask.
  • 16:33 - 16:35
    Because I start laughing out loud.
  • 16:35 - 16:39
    I walk on to the hotel.
  • 16:39 - 16:41
    Before I enter the hotel,
  • 16:41 - 16:42
    I enter a store.
  • 16:42 - 16:44
    I buy three mars bars, three snicker bars,
  • 16:44 - 16:48
    one bottle of Mecca cola,
    a pack of cigarettes.
  • 16:48 - 16:50
    I sit in the lobby,
  • 16:50 - 16:51
    I eat the snickers, the marses,
  • 16:51 - 16:53
    I swallow the bottle of Mecca cola,
  • 16:53 - 16:56
    I light a cigarette and
    someone taps on my shoulder.
  • 16:57 - 17:03
    And? How did it go, my boy?
  • 17:03 - 17:07
    Was my father. All quiet and peace.
  • 17:07 - 17:10
    The stoning of the Devil kicks off
    the Feast of the Sacrifice.
  • 17:10 - 17:11
    I say "Sacrifice". Some say "Slaughter".
  • 17:11 - 17:13
    I prefer 'Feast of the Sacrifice'.
  • 17:13 - 17:15
    It commemorates this scene:
  • 17:15 - 17:18
    the story of Abraham
    who is again put to the test.
  • 17:18 - 17:21
    God orders him to sacrifice his son.
  • 17:21 - 17:24
    In the Bible it's Isaac,
    in the Quran it's Ismail.
  • 17:24 - 17:26
    Let's say it's Ismail.
  • 17:26 - 17:29
    But at the moment suprême,
    this moment, that is,
  • 17:29 - 17:31
    an angel descends from heaven.
  • 17:31 - 17:33
    It points out this ram to Abraham,
  • 17:33 - 17:35
    in the lower right corner,
  • 17:35 - 17:37
    with its horn entangled in the bush.
  • 17:37 - 17:40
    The Feast of the Sacrifice, you might say
  • 17:40 - 17:42
    commemorates the fact
    that we don't slaughter
  • 17:42 - 17:45
    our children but our animals unstunned.
  • 17:45 - 17:49
    I offered a sheep too.
  • 17:49 - 17:51
    Really. I kept the ticket.
  • 17:51 - 17:55
    Where is it? Here.
    Can you see it?
  • 17:55 - 17:58
    Sharp eyes.
    It says 410, doesn't it?
  • 17:58 - 18:02
    Take it.
    It says 410 rial, doesn't it?
  • 18:02 - 18:05
    Saudi currency. Divide by 5.
    82 euro.
  • 18:05 - 18:08
    82 euro to buy a sheep,
    have it slaughtered,
  • 18:08 - 18:11
    chopped up, fly across the world,
  • 18:11 - 18:12
    distributed among the poor and needy.
  • 18:12 - 18:15
    I haven't seen the sheep.
  • 18:15 - 18:18
    Impossible. 5.5 million people
    who all want to be there.
  • 18:18 - 18:20
    Slaughterhouses have limited capacity.
  • 18:20 - 18:22
    That ticket is proof of the sheep
  • 18:22 - 18:27
    which is why I want it back.
  • 18:27 - 18:29
    At the Feast of the Sacrifice
    you may shave off your hair
  • 18:29 - 18:32
    as a sign of literal transformation.
  • 18:32 - 18:34
    You leave part of yourself behind
  • 18:34 - 18:37
    in this sacred place.
  • 18:37 - 18:39
    Only the men shave.
  • 18:39 - 18:42
    5.5 million people, 60% males,
    80% of whom go bald.
  • 18:42 - 18:45
    That means 2.4 million men.
  • 18:45 - 18:48
    It happens everywhere, this going bald.
  • 18:48 - 18:50
    As a result the streets of Mecca
  • 18:50 - 18:53
    are covered in men's hair for three days.
  • 18:53 - 18:56
    So you need to clean your slippers
  • 18:56 - 18:59
    before you enter your hotel room.
  • 18:59 - 19:05
    This is him, Satan.
  • 19:07 - 19:10
    Not really, it's a symbol.
  • 19:10 - 19:13
    You throw stones at it,
    for three days.
  • 19:13 - 19:16
    Then we pay a last visit
    to the Masjid al-Haram.
  • 19:16 - 19:17
    We perform a farewell Tawaaf.
  • 19:17 - 19:20
    This is the last thing we do in Mecca.
  • 19:20 - 19:23
    We go on to Medina
  • 19:23 - 19:27
    to visit the mosque
    and the grave of the prophet,
  • 19:27 - 19:29
    the Masjid an-Nabawi,
    the prophet's mosque,
  • 19:29 - 19:32
    which is built around Mohammed's grave.
  • 19:32 - 19:34
    We salute the grave.
  • 19:34 - 19:38
    Salute. Remember, no praying at the grave,
    that is not allowed.
  • 19:38 - 19:40
    It is sherk, idolatry.
  • 19:40 - 19:44
    No, Muhammad was a simple man, we salute.
  • 19:44 - 19:47
    Then you buy 7 kilos of dates,
  • 19:47 - 19:50
    you fill a jerry can
    with 10 liter of Zamzam water,
  • 19:50 - 19:52
    you buy an alarm
    indicating the hours of prayer
  • 19:52 - 19:56
    and having the call to prayer
    as an alarm tone.
  • 19:56 - 19:57
    You buy it for your mother.
  • 19:57 - 20:01
    You get onto the plane in Medina,
    stop over at Istanbul.
  • 20:01 - 20:03
    You land at Schiphol airport.
  • 20:03 - 20:07
    There are thousands of happy Turks.
  • 20:07 - 20:08
    There are flowers.
  • 20:08 - 20:11
    There is applause. Masha Allah.
  • 20:11 - 20:14
    You performed the Hajj.
  • 20:14 - 20:17
    (Applause)
Title:
TEDxFlandersSalon - Sadettin Kirmiziyuz - The Hajj, a holy road story
Description:

Sadettin Kirmiziyüz (Zutphen, 1982) graduated in 2007 from the Maastricht Theater Academy. Kirmiziyüz was born and grew up in Zutphen, but is fascinated by the fact that he is a migrant's son. In november 2010 Sadettin Kirmiziyüz made the greatest journey of his life. With his father he went to Mecca for the pilgrimage, the Hajj, to continue a family trandition. His father initiated him as a pupil into this ancient ritual. This experience is the basis for a performance about fathers and sons, believing and not believing, Abraham, Isaac, Mohammed, God and Allah. A holy road story where nothing is impossible and everything is true.
TEDxFlandersSalon 21 May 2012

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Video Language:
Dutch
Team:
closed TED
Project:
TEDxTalks
Duration:
20:23

English subtitles

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