(annoyed) I've been trying to reach out to you all day.
Are we on for tonight?
(sends text)
(sighing) Geeze.
What? You can't catch me. You can't catch me.
I'm Lance Moore. Touchdown, bitch.
What? Pause.
(text message alert)
Awww, shoot.
Keegan's been texting me.
Sorry, dude. Missed your texts.
I assumed we'd meet at the bar.
Whatever. I don't care.
(sends text message)
(text message alert)
(rudely) "Sorry, dude. Missed your text.
I assumed we'd meet at the bar.
Whatever. I don't care."
Whatever, I don't care?!
What the fuck is his problem?
(testily) Do you even want to hang out?!
(calmly) Do you even wanna hang out?
Oooh. That's considerate.
Like I said, whatever.
(angrily) Like I said, whatever?!
Fuck this guy!
Jesus, you...
(calmly) ..are fucking priceless.
Awwwww! You're the...
(angrily) ..one who's fucking priceless?!
This...
This mother fucker right here.
Oh, he wants to-- Okay, mmm-hmm.
(inhales sharply) Mmm-hmm.
(through teeth) Okay.
You wanna go?!
Right now? Huh.
Guess I could do that.
(clears throat) Okay!
OK, LET'S GO?! He said, "O--"
OKAY, LET'S GO?!
ALRIGHT, YOU KNOW WHAT?! YOU KNOW WHAT?
YOU WANNA REALLY...
(calmly)..do this now?
Keegan, you nut.
You're not putting me out.
FUCK YEAH, LET'S DO IT?!
Oh, you fucking asshole!
(calmly) First round's mine.
OH NO!
There ain't gonna be no rounds, asshole!
It's gonna be a fucking streetfight! (muttering) This son of a--
YOU!
Buddy! Like I said, first round's mine.
A beer and a gimlet for my partner right...
What's that?
Uh, I-I-I got you a baseball bat with nails in it.
For my post-apocalyptic Jackie Robinson costume.
How did you know?
[captioned by www.facebook.com/subtitleyoutube]