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Many parents with families and people

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planning their families have realized

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that there are many alternatives to the

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mainstream schooling system.

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Whether it be homeschooling, unschooling,

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Waldorf or Montessori, just to name a few

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options, there are so many out there.

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Today I am going to introduce you to my

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friend, Lucy, at Life Without School

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and she is going to share 6 reasons why

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she chooses to unschool her children.

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Here she is...

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Lucy: Hi everybody! I'm Lucy.

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I live in New Zealand in a yurt with my

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2 children, Ramona who is 9 and Gina who
is 7.

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And my partner, Tim.

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One of the more radical parts of our life

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is that we live a life totally without 
school.

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In fact, we live a life totally without

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any curriculum whatsoever.

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Some people call this unschooling, some

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people call it whole life learning, but

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it's really just living as humans have

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lived for millennia. Which is learning by

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doing and learning within your community.

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Learning from those around you. Simply

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experiencing rather than sitting behind a

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desk being taught stuff that you're not

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really that interested in.

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It's really a paradigm that exists totally

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outside of mainstream education.

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And today I wanted to share with you

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6 of the main reasons that we do it.

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There's actually loads and loads, but

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I've tried to distill them into 6.

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When we became parents, one of the main

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things we wanted to do is to provide an

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environment for our children where they

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could just blossom into who they were

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inside without any of our molding or

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shaping of them. I don't really think

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that that is the the job of the parents.

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I think the parents main role is to make

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space for this unique human that has been

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brought into their life. For us,

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unschooling is really an extension of that
philosophy.

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We just want to support our children and

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the way they want to learn and what they

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want to learn. Without them feeling any

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need to conform to what we expect or what

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we think, arbitrarily, they should be 
learning.

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So, the number 1 reason is that we want

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our children to be able to learn in a way

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that is free from shame. So, you know,

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85% of adults have had an experience of

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shaming in their school years that so

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effected them that it impacts their adult 
life.

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That's 85%. 
That's a huge majority of people.

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And that's because mainstream education

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uses shame and punishment as a way to get

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such a massive group of kids learning what

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teachers think is important. Shame can

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have a pretty catastrophic impact on your

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ability to really be yourself. So we

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wanted to provide an environment where

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our kids didn't experience that.

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Even when they were learning in a way that

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seemed pretty random or messy (laughs),

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we could just make space for that

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learning and how they wanted to do it.

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I think because of the mainstream

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education system we've made shame and

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punishment quite an everyday part of the

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human experience. We've kind of

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normalized it and that has been done to

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the detriment of our ability to create a

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fair, just, and beautiful world.

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Okay, number 2. Unschooling is curiosity

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based learning. And we embrace that

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because all of the studies show that

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learning that is done where there is self

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motivation, or a kind of seed of curiosity

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is one, much more effective for learning

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the actual thing that you are trying to

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pick up, but also activates parts of your

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brain that makes it easier for you to

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learn anything that is coming up while

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you are in that state. Also, thirdly,

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studies show that curiosity allows

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learning to be stored in your memory.

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So, the learning when you are curious is

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like a long term thing.

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I can imagine that quite a lot of you

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watching understand that on some level,

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because how much of your schooling do you

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actually remember?

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For me, it is very little. I am a writer

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and I have to google the difference

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between noun and adjective (laughs)

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on quite a regular basis.

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The 3rd reason that we are unschoolers

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is because we want to create a learning

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environment that's totally stress free.

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Just like learning without curiosity,

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learning in a stressful environment is

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such a waste of time. Stress has a huge

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impact on your amygdala, which essentially

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ends up sending information to the wrong

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part of your brain, not to your higher

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brain where you can rationally look at the

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information and create a learning journey.

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But it sends it down to the fight or

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flight zone when you are in stress, so

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your brain actually doesn't know what to

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do with information when you are in a 
stressful state.

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There are some statistics about this,

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saying that 65% of 12 year old school

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children are stressed because of their

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school environment. Obviously, that has

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a massive impact on what they are actually

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taking in, what information they are

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actually taking in while they are in the 
classroom.

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But also, huge impacts on their mental

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health and their physical health.

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I just think that trying to raise

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children in a constantly stressful

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environment, because of testing and

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competition, because of shame and

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punishment, is just a super unhealthy 
thing.

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So, a typical day of unschooling might

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involve us hanging around here. It often

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involves us meeting up with friends and

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doing different unschooling groups and

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exploring the wild. It's always fun.

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There might be conflict, but there is

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space to figure out the conflicts so it

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doesn't become a genuinely toxic or

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stressful scenario. We're joy seekers

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rather than stressed out learners.

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4, we are unschooling because we believe

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that you are learning all of the time.

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Learning doesn't begin at 5 and ends

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at 18 when you leave formal education

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But most parents get this, right?

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You don't try to teach your child to walk

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or talk, you just know that they're 
going to

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pick those things up by being in a walky, 
talky

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kind of environment. And we just believe

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that that continues on. Nothing needs to

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change when they turn a certain age.

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Our kids are 7 and 9 now, and they are

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reading, writing, doing art, creating,

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making things, doing heaps of math,

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like genuine love of math. And they are

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just doing it by living. There has never

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been a sit down, formal class for my
children.

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They always just learn through their

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experience of being human. And, actually,

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as adults we do this all the time. If we

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want to learn something new as an adult

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we will just find a way to access it.

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In the last few years I have taught myself

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how to play the ukulele, I've taught

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myself how to make electronic digital

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music (laughs). I've built a business.

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I've done absolutely loads of things like

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moving almost into mastery of some of 
those things

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simply by accessing the resources that

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will help me. Even doctors do this when

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they get presented with a case that they

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don't really know what's going on.

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They might ring some colleagues, they

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might look up online, or delve into their

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books in order to get to the bottom this

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new illness or this new case.

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That is really essentially unschooling.

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It's learning through doing.

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The 5th reason we are unschooling is

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because we just trust our children and we

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want them to learn that they can trust

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themselves. Our children know that their

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instincts are good, that their urges are

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good, that their needs are valuable.

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Whereas I think mainstream education can

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really undermine a child's trust in

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themselves. They're told to learn this in

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this moment, and then a bell rings and

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they're told to switch their mind over to

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the new thing and learn that thing.

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They're told to mistrust their body's

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desire to move when it wants to move.

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We even ask children, through schooling,

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to trespass on their own boundaries, both

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mentally and physically, quite a lot

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through mainstream education. And through

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unschooling we kind of do the opposite

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of this. We say, what you are feeling is

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good, your needs are good, I trust you and

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you can trust yourself.

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And that leads me to the 6th reason

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that we are unschooling and that's all

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about world change. When i first began

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this whole unschooling thing I just

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thought, ya we're doing this because this

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is what works for our family and this is

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the path we've been called to. But the

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more that I'm immersed in this world,

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I've actually come to believe that

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unschooling and other forms of alternative

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education are really the embodiment of

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the just and peaceful, loving world that

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I think is possible. I believe that

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mainstream education, as it stands, with

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it's shame, punishment, testing,

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competitive nature...you know, ranking

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kids against each other...I believe that

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is like the seedbed of some of society's

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most problematic issues. We're coming

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into this understanding that we are

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actually not born competitive.

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We're born cooperative, that's our human

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nature, I really believe that. I think

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through the schooling system we pit kids

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against each other and that bleeds into

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the rest of society. There's almost like

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a collective societal wound from our

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school days and it makes itself known in

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individuals in a different way. So, some

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people are people pleasers, some people

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are afraid of authority or afraid to rock

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the boat. A lot of people feel that they

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are just not intrinsically good enough.

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A lot of people struggle to rest and play.

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This is all stuff that we learn through

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our schooling years, when we are being

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shunted from one activity to the other

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with our minds placed in somebody elses'

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hands. These days I tend to think that

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mainstream education is one of the

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strongholds of capitalism.

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Raising people who are so

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unhappy and mistrust themselves so

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much with so much mental anguish that we

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have to consume and fight in order to

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feel okay. Oooh, got a little bit heavy

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there (laughs). But for me, that makes

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sense, when you place children for 15,

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or more, of their formative years into an

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institution that's kind of what you get.

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Those are 6 of the reasons that we've

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chosen unschooling. I'm super happy to

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answer any questions that you have and the

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unschooling world is very friendly, so if

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you want to jump on board this ship we

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would welcome you with open arms.

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That sounds a bit weird and cult-y, it's

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not really like that. There's too much

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anarchy for it to be cult-y. (laughs)

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Rob: I hope that you got a lot out of that

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time with Lucy. If you did, make sure to

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subscribe to her channel where she shares

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a lot of valuable information on teaching

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children in a home setting.

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And make sure to subscribe to this

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channel, as well, for a lot more great
videos to come.

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I love you all very much and see you again
real soon!