0:00:00.217,0:00:02.801 Many parents with families and people 0:00:02.801,0:00:05.117 planning their families have realized 0:00:05.117,0:00:07.186 that there are many alternatives to the 0:00:07.186,0:00:09.070 mainstream schooling system. 0:00:09.070,0:00:11.388 Whether it be homeschooling, unschooling, 0:00:11.388,0:00:14.657 Waldorf or Montessori, just to name a few 0:00:14.657,0:00:17.226 options, there are so many out there. 0:00:17.226,0:00:19.128 Today I am going to introduce you to my 0:00:19.128,0:00:20.910 friend, Lucy, at Life Without School 0:00:20.910,0:00:23.693 and she is going to share 6 reasons why 0:00:23.693,0:00:26.575 she chooses to unschool her children. 0:00:26.575,0:00:27.559 Here she is... 0:00:27.559,0:00:29.053 Lucy: Hi everybody! I'm Lucy. 0:00:29.053,0:00:31.023 I live in New Zealand in a yurt with my 0:00:31.023,0:00:33.934 2 children, Ramona who is 9 and Gina who[br]is 7. 0:00:33.934,0:00:35.615 And my partner, Tim. 0:00:35.615,0:00:37.682 One of the more radical parts of our life 0:00:37.682,0:00:40.001 is that we live a life totally without [br]school. 0:00:40.001,0:00:43.286 In fact, we live a life totally without 0:00:43.286,0:00:45.537 any curriculum whatsoever. 0:00:45.537,0:00:47.702 Some people call this unschooling, some 0:00:47.702,0:00:49.636 people call it whole life learning, but 0:00:49.636,0:00:52.020 it's really just living as humans have 0:00:52.020,0:00:55.739 lived for millennia. Which is learning by 0:00:55.739,0:00:59.225 doing and learning within your community. 0:00:59.225,0:01:01.448 Learning from those around you. Simply 0:01:01.448,0:01:04.211 experiencing rather than sitting behind a 0:01:04.211,0:01:06.313 desk being taught stuff that you're not 0:01:06.313,0:01:07.760 really that interested in. 0:01:07.760,0:01:09.796 It's really a paradigm that exists totally 0:01:09.796,0:01:12.347 outside of mainstream education. 0:01:12.347,0:01:14.262 And today I wanted to share with you 0:01:14.262,0:01:16.253 6 of the main reasons that we do it. 0:01:16.253,0:01:18.109 There's actually loads and loads, but 0:01:18.109,0:01:19.966 I've tried to distill them into 6. 0:01:19.966,0:01:22.034 When we became parents, one of the main 0:01:22.034,0:01:23.936 things we wanted to do is to provide an 0:01:23.936,0:01:25.852 environment for our children where they 0:01:25.852,0:01:28.387 could just blossom into who they were 0:01:28.387,0:01:32.581 inside without any of our molding or 0:01:32.581,0:01:34.528 shaping of them. I don't really think 0:01:34.528,0:01:36.457 that that is the the job of the parents. 0:01:36.457,0:01:39.289 I think the parents main role is to make 0:01:39.289,0:01:42.190 space for this unique human that has been 0:01:42.190,0:01:43.908 brought into their life. For us, 0:01:43.908,0:01:46.726 unschooling is really an extension of that[br]philosophy. 0:01:46.726,0:01:49.111 We just want to support our children and 0:01:49.111,0:01:51.495 the way they want to learn and what they 0:01:51.495,0:01:53.580 want to learn. Without them feeling any 0:01:53.580,0:01:56.880 need to conform to what we expect or what 0:01:56.880,0:02:00.030 we think, arbitrarily, they should be [br]learning. 0:02:00.030,0:02:02.026 So, the number 1 reason is that we want 0:02:02.026,0:02:04.601 our children to be able to learn in a way 0:02:04.601,0:02:07.134 that is free from shame. So, you know, 0:02:07.134,0:02:10.434 85% of adults have had an experience of 0:02:10.434,0:02:13.339 shaming in their school years that so 0:02:13.339,0:02:15.988 effected them that it impacts their adult [br]life. 0:02:15.988,0:02:19.841 That's 85%. [br]That's a huge majority of people. 0:02:19.841,0:02:22.129 And that's because mainstream education 0:02:22.129,0:02:25.123 uses shame and punishment as a way to get 0:02:25.123,0:02:28.294 such a massive group of kids learning what 0:02:28.294,0:02:30.253 teachers think is important. Shame can 0:02:30.253,0:02:33.009 have a pretty catastrophic impact on your 0:02:33.009,0:02:35.394 ability to really be yourself. So we 0:02:35.394,0:02:37.460 wanted to provide an environment where 0:02:37.460,0:02:39.238 our kids didn't experience that. 0:02:39.238,0:02:41.253 Even when they were learning in a way that 0:02:41.253,0:02:43.452 seemed pretty random or messy (laughs), 0:02:43.452,0:02:46.434 we could just make space for that 0:02:46.434,0:02:48.596 learning and how they wanted to do it. 0:02:48.596,0:02:50.252 I think because of the mainstream 0:02:50.252,0:02:52.184 education system we've made shame and 0:02:52.184,0:02:55.353 punishment quite an everyday part of the 0:02:55.353,0:02:57.207 human experience. We've kind of 0:02:57.207,0:02:59.739 normalized it and that has been done to 0:02:59.739,0:03:02.188 the detriment of our ability to create a 0:03:02.188,0:03:04.805 fair, just, and beautiful world. 0:03:04.805,0:03:07.123 Okay, number 2. Unschooling is curiosity 0:03:07.123,0:03:09.544 based learning. And we embrace that 0:03:09.544,0:03:11.993 because all of the studies show that 0:03:11.993,0:03:14.444 learning that is done where there is self 0:03:14.444,0:03:17.212 motivation, or a kind of seed of curiosity 0:03:17.212,0:03:20.297 is one, much more effective for learning 0:03:20.297,0:03:22.382 the actual thing that you are trying to 0:03:22.382,0:03:24.715 pick up, but also activates parts of your 0:03:24.715,0:03:26.915 brain that makes it easier for you to 0:03:26.915,0:03:29.601 learn anything that is coming up while 0:03:29.601,0:03:32.735 you are in that state. Also, thirdly, 0:03:32.735,0:03:35.702 studies show that curiosity allows 0:03:35.702,0:03:38.586 learning to be stored in your memory. 0:03:38.586,0:03:40.555 So, the learning when you are curious is 0:03:40.555,0:03:41.938 like a long term thing. 0:03:41.938,0:03:43.809 I can imagine that quite a lot of you 0:03:43.809,0:03:45.767 watching understand that on some level, 0:03:45.767,0:03:47.743 because how much of your schooling do you 0:03:47.743,0:03:49.191 actually remember? 0:03:49.191,0:03:51.376 For me, it is very little. I am a writer 0:03:51.376,0:03:53.547 and I have to google the difference 0:03:53.547,0:03:55.561 between noun and adjective (laughs) 0:03:55.561,0:03:57.094 on quite a regular basis. 0:03:57.094,0:03:58.995 The 3rd reason that we are unschoolers 0:03:58.995,0:04:01.013 is because we want to create a learning 0:04:01.013,0:04:02.911 environment that's totally stress free. 0:04:02.911,0:04:04.881 Just like learning without curiosity, 0:04:04.881,0:04:06.949 learning in a stressful environment is 0:04:06.949,0:04:09.381 such a waste of time. Stress has a huge 0:04:09.381,0:04:12.001 impact on your amygdala, which essentially 0:04:12.001,0:04:14.718 ends up sending information to the wrong 0:04:14.718,0:04:16.648 part of your brain, not to your higher 0:04:16.648,0:04:19.053 brain where you can rationally look at the 0:04:19.053,0:04:21.148 information and create a learning journey. 0:04:21.148,0:04:22.959 But it sends it down to the fight or 0:04:22.959,0:04:24.975 flight zone when you are in stress, so 0:04:24.975,0:04:26.922 your brain actually doesn't know what to 0:04:26.922,0:04:29.790 do with information when you are in a [br]stressful state. 0:04:29.790,0:04:31.578 There are some statistics about this, 0:04:31.578,0:04:35.127 saying that 65% of 12 year old school 0:04:35.127,0:04:37.666 children are stressed because of their 0:04:37.666,0:04:39.844 school environment. Obviously, that has 0:04:39.844,0:04:41.862 a massive impact on what they are actually 0:04:41.862,0:04:43.645 taking in, what information they are 0:04:43.645,0:04:46.136 actually taking in while they are in the [br]classroom. 0:04:46.136,0:04:48.028 But also, huge impacts on their mental 0:04:48.028,0:04:49.718 health and their physical health. 0:04:49.718,0:04:51.417 I just think that trying to raise 0:04:51.417,0:04:53.166 children in a constantly stressful 0:04:53.166,0:04:55.083 environment, because of testing and 0:04:55.083,0:04:57.235 competition, because of shame and 0:04:57.235,0:05:00.068 punishment, is just a super unhealthy [br]thing. 0:05:00.068,0:05:01.987 So, a typical day of unschooling might 0:05:01.987,0:05:04.537 involve us hanging around here. It often 0:05:04.537,0:05:06.856 involves us meeting up with friends and 0:05:06.856,0:05:09.373 doing different unschooling groups and 0:05:09.373,0:05:12.594 exploring the wild. It's always fun. 0:05:12.594,0:05:14.404 There might be conflict, but there is 0:05:14.404,0:05:16.261 space to figure out the conflicts so it 0:05:16.261,0:05:19.125 doesn't become a genuinely toxic or 0:05:19.125,0:05:21.528 stressful scenario. We're joy seekers 0:05:21.528,0:05:24.040 rather than stressed out learners. 0:05:24.040,0:05:25.944 4, we are unschooling because we believe 0:05:25.944,0:05:28.232 that you are learning all of the time. 0:05:28.232,0:05:30.003 Learning doesn't begin at 5 and ends 0:05:30.003,0:05:32.164 at 18 when you leave formal education 0:05:32.164,0:05:34.449 But most parents get this, right? 0:05:34.449,0:05:37.115 You don't try to teach your child to walk 0:05:37.115,0:05:39.400 or talk, you just know that they're [br]going to 0:05:39.400,0:05:42.078 pick those things up by being in a walky, [br]talky 0:05:42.078,0:05:44.568 kind of environment. And we just believe 0:05:44.568,0:05:47.053 that that continues on. Nothing needs to 0:05:47.053,0:05:50.222 change when they turn a certain age. 0:05:50.222,0:05:52.422 Our kids are 7 and 9 now, and they are 0:05:52.422,0:05:56.043 reading, writing, doing art, creating, 0:05:56.043,0:05:59.042 making things, doing heaps of math, 0:05:59.042,0:06:01.591 like genuine love of math. And they are 0:06:01.591,0:06:04.078 just doing it by living. There has never 0:06:04.078,0:06:07.478 been a sit down, formal class for my[br]children. 0:06:07.478,0:06:09.728 They always just learn through their 0:06:09.728,0:06:11.777 experience of being human. And, actually, 0:06:11.777,0:06:14.015 as adults we do this all the time. If we 0:06:14.015,0:06:16.230 want to learn something new as an adult 0:06:16.230,0:06:18.283 we will just find a way to access it. 0:06:18.283,0:06:21.101 In the last few years I have taught myself 0:06:21.101,0:06:23.036 how to play the ukulele, I've taught 0:06:23.036,0:06:25.428 myself how to make electronic digital 0:06:25.428,0:06:27.501 music (laughs). I've built a business. 0:06:27.501,0:06:29.478 I've done absolutely loads of things like 0:06:29.478,0:06:32.503 moving almost into mastery of some of [br]those things 0:06:32.503,0:06:34.958 simply by accessing the resources that 0:06:34.958,0:06:36.897 will help me. Even doctors do this when 0:06:36.897,0:06:38.905 they get presented with a case that they 0:06:38.905,0:06:40.629 don't really know what's going on. 0:06:40.629,0:06:42.493 They might ring some colleagues, they 0:06:42.493,0:06:44.592 might look up online, or delve into their 0:06:44.592,0:06:47.527 books in order to get to the bottom this 0:06:47.527,0:06:49.547 new illness or this new case. 0:06:49.547,0:06:52.631 That is really essentially unschooling. 0:06:52.631,0:06:54.463 It's learning through doing. 0:06:54.463,0:06:56.449 The 5th reason we are unschooling is 0:06:56.449,0:06:58.866 because we just trust our children and we 0:06:58.866,0:07:01.099 want them to learn that they can trust 0:07:01.099,0:07:03.051 themselves. Our children know that their 0:07:03.051,0:07:06.270 instincts are good, that their urges are 0:07:06.270,0:07:08.551 good, that their needs are valuable. 0:07:08.551,0:07:11.422 Whereas I think mainstream education can 0:07:11.422,0:07:13.692 really undermine a child's trust in 0:07:13.692,0:07:15.755 themselves. They're told to learn this in 0:07:15.755,0:07:17.651 this moment, and then a bell rings and 0:07:17.651,0:07:19.790 they're told to switch their mind over to 0:07:19.790,0:07:21.593 the new thing and learn that thing. 0:07:21.593,0:07:23.432 They're told to mistrust their body's 0:07:23.432,0:07:25.218 desire to move when it wants to move. 0:07:25.218,0:07:27.215 We even ask children, through schooling, 0:07:27.215,0:07:31.312 to trespass on their own boundaries, both 0:07:31.312,0:07:33.228 mentally and physically, quite a lot 0:07:33.228,0:07:35.263 through mainstream education. And through 0:07:35.263,0:07:37.172 unschooling we kind of do the opposite 0:07:37.172,0:07:39.211 of this. We say, what you are feeling is 0:07:39.211,0:07:41.245 good, your needs are good, I trust you and 0:07:41.245,0:07:43.200 you can trust yourself. 0:07:43.200,0:07:44.955 And that leads me to the 6th reason 0:07:44.955,0:07:46.824 that we are unschooling and that's all 0:07:46.824,0:07:48.774 about world change. When i first began 0:07:48.774,0:07:50.508 this whole unschooling thing I just 0:07:50.508,0:07:52.514 thought, ya we're doing this because this 0:07:52.514,0:07:54.565 is what works for our family and this is 0:07:54.565,0:07:56.504 the path we've been called to. But the 0:07:56.504,0:07:58.639 more that I'm immersed in this world, 0:07:58.639,0:08:00.541 I've actually come to believe that 0:08:00.541,0:08:02.807 unschooling and other forms of alternative 0:08:02.807,0:08:05.393 education are really the embodiment of 0:08:05.393,0:08:07.961 the just and peaceful, loving world that 0:08:07.961,0:08:10.194 I think is possible. I believe that 0:08:10.194,0:08:12.594 mainstream education, as it stands, with 0:08:12.594,0:08:15.330 it's shame, punishment, testing, 0:08:15.330,0:08:17.748 competitive nature...you know, ranking 0:08:17.748,0:08:19.748 kids against each other...I believe that 0:08:19.748,0:08:22.215 is like the seedbed of some of society's 0:08:22.215,0:08:24.948 most problematic issues. We're coming 0:08:24.948,0:08:26.780 into this understanding that we are 0:08:26.780,0:08:28.718 actually not born competitive. 0:08:28.718,0:08:31.303 We're born cooperative, that's our human 0:08:31.303,0:08:33.218 nature, I really believe that. I think 0:08:33.218,0:08:35.603 through the schooling system we pit kids 0:08:35.603,0:08:38.122 against each other and that bleeds into 0:08:38.122,0:08:40.723 the rest of society. There's almost like 0:08:40.723,0:08:43.207 a collective societal wound from our 0:08:43.207,0:08:45.635 school days and it makes itself known in 0:08:45.635,0:08:47.608 individuals in a different way. So, some 0:08:47.608,0:08:50.143 people are people pleasers, some people 0:08:50.143,0:08:52.643 are afraid of authority or afraid to rock 0:08:52.643,0:08:54.860 the boat. A lot of people feel that they 0:08:54.860,0:08:57.477 are just not intrinsically good enough. 0:08:57.477,0:08:59.863 A lot of people struggle to rest and play. 0:08:59.863,0:09:01.964 This is all stuff that we learn through 0:09:01.964,0:09:04.063 our schooling years, when we are being 0:09:04.063,0:09:06.099 shunted from one activity to the other 0:09:06.099,0:09:08.285 with our minds placed in somebody elses' 0:09:08.285,0:09:10.201 hands. These days I tend to think that 0:09:10.201,0:09:12.030 mainstream education is one of the 0:09:12.030,0:09:13.546 strongholds of capitalism. 0:09:13.546,0:09:15.216 Raising people who are so 0:09:15.216,0:09:17.438 unhappy and mistrust themselves so 0:09:17.438,0:09:19.754 much with so much mental anguish that we 0:09:19.754,0:09:22.474 have to consume and fight in order to 0:09:22.474,0:09:24.738 feel okay. Oooh, got a little bit heavy 0:09:24.738,0:09:26.690 there (laughs). But for me, that makes 0:09:26.690,0:09:28.712 sense, when you place children for 15, 0:09:28.712,0:09:32.842 or more, of their formative years into an 0:09:32.842,0:09:35.109 institution that's kind of what you get. 0:09:35.109,0:09:36.970 Those are 6 of the reasons that we've 0:09:36.970,0:09:38.879 chosen unschooling. I'm super happy to 0:09:38.879,0:09:40.919 answer any questions that you have and the 0:09:40.919,0:09:42.987 unschooling world is very friendly, so if 0:09:42.987,0:09:44.877 you want to jump on board this ship we 0:09:44.877,0:09:46.575 would welcome you with open arms. 0:09:46.575,0:09:48.572 That sounds a bit weird and cult-y, it's 0:09:48.572,0:09:50.496 not really like that. There's too much 0:09:50.496,0:09:52.337 anarchy for it to be cult-y. (laughs) 0:09:52.337,0:09:54.373 Rob: I hope that you got a lot out of that 0:09:54.373,0:09:56.469 time with Lucy. If you did, make sure to 0:09:56.469,0:09:58.604 subscribe to her channel where she shares 0:09:58.604,0:10:01.204 a lot of valuable information on teaching 0:10:01.204,0:10:03.571 children in a home setting. 0:10:03.571,0:10:05.287 And make sure to subscribe to this 0:10:05.287,0:10:08.423 channel, as well, for a lot more great[br]videos to come. 0:10:08.423,0:10:11.861 I love you all very much and see you again[br]real soon!