[Script Info]
Title: 
[Events]
Format: Layer, Start, End, Style, Name, MarginL, MarginR, MarginV, Effect, Text
Dialogue: 0,0:00:00.88,0:00:03.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We're going to share\Na lot of secrets today, you and I,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:03.84,0:00:06.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and in doing so, I hope that we can lift
Dialogue: 0,0:00:06.32,0:00:08.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,some of the shame\Nmany of us feel about sex.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:10.92,0:00:14.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,How many here have ever been\Ncatcalled by a stranger?
Dialogue: 0,0:00:16.08,0:00:17.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Lots of women.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:18.52,0:00:21.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,For me, the time I remember best
Dialogue: 0,0:00:21.20,0:00:24.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is when that stranger\Nwas a student of mine.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:25.60,0:00:28.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He came up to me after class that night
Dialogue: 0,0:00:28.56,0:00:31.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and his words confirmed\Nwhat I already knew:
Dialogue: 0,0:00:31.44,0:00:33.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"I am so sorry, professor.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:33.24,0:00:37.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If I had known it was you,\NI would never have said those things."
Dialogue: 0,0:00:37.16,0:00:39.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:00:39.48,0:00:43.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I wasn't a person to him\Nuntil I was his professor.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:44.52,0:00:47.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This concept, called objectification,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:47.12,0:00:49.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is the foundation of sexism,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:49.20,0:00:52.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and we see it reinforced\Nthrough every aspect of our lives.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:55.64,0:00:57.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We see it in the government
Dialogue: 0,0:00:57.88,0:01:01.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that refuses to punish men
Dialogue: 0,0:01:01.32,0:01:03.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for raping women.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:03.08,0:01:05.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We see it in advertisements.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:05.40,0:01:07.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,How many of you have seen an advertisement
Dialogue: 0,0:01:07.43,0:01:12.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that uses a woman's breast\Nto sell an entirely unrelated product?
Dialogue: 0,0:01:14.52,0:01:18.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Or movie after movie after movie
Dialogue: 0,0:01:18.32,0:01:21.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that portrays women\Nas only love interests?
Dialogue: 0,0:01:22.20,0:01:25.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,These examples might seem\Ninconsequential and harmless,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:25.84,0:01:27.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but they're insidious,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:27.12,0:01:31.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,slowly building into a culture\Nthat refuses to see women as people.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:31.96,0:01:36.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We see this in the school\Nthat sends home a 10-year-old girl
Dialogue: 0,0:01:36.17,0:01:39.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because her clothes were\Na distraction to boys trying to learn,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:39.84,0:01:45.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or the government that refuses\Nto punish men for raping women
Dialogue: 0,0:01:45.04,0:01:46.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,over and over,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:46.64,0:01:48.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or the woman who is killed
Dialogue: 0,0:01:48.12,0:01:52.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because she asked a man to stop\Ngrinding on her on the dance floor.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:55.52,0:02:00.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Media plays a large role in perpetuating\Nthe objectification of women.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:01.40,0:02:04.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Let's consider\Nthe classic romantic comedy.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:04.24,0:02:08.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We're typically introduced\Nto two kinds of women in these movies,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:08.16,0:02:10.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,two kinds of desirable women, anyway.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:10.92,0:02:13.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The first is the sexy bombshell.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:13.36,0:02:17.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is the unbelievably gorgeous woman\Nwith the perfect body.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:17.04,0:02:19.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Our leading man\Nhas no trouble identifying her
Dialogue: 0,0:02:19.68,0:02:22.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and even less trouble having sex with her.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:22.76,0:02:24.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The second is our leading lady,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:24.64,0:02:28.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the beautiful but demure woman\Nour leading man falls in love with
Dialogue: 0,0:02:28.52,0:02:30.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,despite not noticing her at first
Dialogue: 0,0:02:30.68,0:02:33.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or not liking her if he did.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:33.84,0:02:35.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The first is the slut.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:35.88,0:02:37.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She is to be consumed and forgotten.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:37.92,0:02:39.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She is much too available.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:39.80,0:02:43.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The second is desirable but modest,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:43.48,0:02:46.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and therefore worthy\Nof our leading man's future babies.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:46.96,0:02:48.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Marriage material.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:48.76,0:02:51.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We're actually told\Nthat women have two roles,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:51.72,0:02:55.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but these two roles have a difficult time\Nexisting within the same woman.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:56.56,0:03:00.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,On the rare occasion\Nthat I share with a new acquaintance
Dialogue: 0,0:03:00.24,0:03:01.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that I study sex,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:01.100,0:03:04.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,if they don't end\Nthe conversation right then,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:04.40,0:03:06.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,they're usually pretty intrigued.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:07.32,0:03:09.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Oh. Tell me more."
Dialogue: 0,0:03:09.12,0:03:10.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So I do.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:12.20,0:03:14.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"I'm really interested\Nin studying the sexual behaviors
Dialogue: 0,0:03:14.84,0:03:16.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,of pregnant and postpartum couples."
Dialogue: 0,0:03:16.64,0:03:20.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,At this point I get\Na different kind of response.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:20.20,0:03:22.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:03:22.20,0:03:23.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Oh. Huh.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:24.68,0:03:26.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Do pregnant people even have sex?
Dialogue: 0,0:03:28.08,0:03:32.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Have you thought\Nabout studying sexual desire
Dialogue: 0,0:03:32.04,0:03:33.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or orgasms?
Dialogue: 0,0:03:33.40,0:03:36.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That would be interesting, and sexy."
Dialogue: 0,0:03:38.12,0:03:40.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Tell me. What are the first words\Nthat come to mind
Dialogue: 0,0:03:40.68,0:03:42.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when you picture a pregnant woman?
Dialogue: 0,0:03:43.28,0:03:46.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I asked this question\Nin a survey of over 500 adults,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:46.72,0:03:50.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and most responded with "belly" or "round"
Dialogue: 0,0:03:50.32,0:03:52.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and "cute."
Dialogue: 0,0:03:53.04,0:03:54.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This didn't surprise me too much.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:54.68,0:03:56.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What else do we label as cute?
Dialogue: 0,0:03:57.84,0:04:00.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Babies. Puppies. Kittens.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:00.36,0:04:02.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The elderly. Right?
Dialogue: 0,0:04:02.04,0:04:03.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:04:05.05,0:04:07.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,When we label an adult as cute, though,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:07.73,0:04:10.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we take away a lot of their intelligence,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:10.24,0:04:11.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,their complexity.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:12.20,0:04:14.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We reduce them to childlike qualities.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:15.56,0:04:17.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I also asked heterosexual men
Dialogue: 0,0:04:17.24,0:04:20.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to imagine a woman that they're\Npartnered with is pregnant,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:20.40,0:04:23.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and then asked women\Nto imagine that they are pregnant,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:23.20,0:04:25.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and then tell me\Nthe first words that come to mind
Dialogue: 0,0:04:25.84,0:04:27.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when they imagine having sex.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:28.96,0:04:31.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Most of the responses were negative.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:32.24,0:04:33.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Gross."
Dialogue: 0,0:04:33.69,0:04:35.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Awkward."
Dialogue: 0,0:04:35.09,0:04:37.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Not sexy." "Odd."
Dialogue: 0,0:04:37.56,0:04:38.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Uncomfortable."
Dialogue: 0,0:04:39.24,0:04:40.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"How?"
Dialogue: 0,0:04:40.52,0:04:42.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:04:43.32,0:04:46.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Not worth the trouble."\N"Not worth the risk."
Dialogue: 0,0:04:46.44,0:04:48.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That last one really stuck with me.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:49.72,0:04:54.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We might think that because we divorce\Npregnant women and moms from sexuality,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:54.48,0:04:59.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we are removing the constraints\Nof sexual objectification.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:59.52,0:05:01.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They experience less sexism. Right?
Dialogue: 0,0:05:02.24,0:05:03.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Not exactly.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:03.84,0:05:06.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What happens instead\Nis a different kind of objectification.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:07.76,0:05:10.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In my efforts to explain this to others,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:10.04,0:05:13.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,one conversation\Nled to the Venus of Willendorf,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:13.84,0:05:18.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,a Paleolithic figurine scholars assumed\Nwas a goddess of love and beauty,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:18.68,0:05:20.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,hence the name Venus.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:20.52,0:05:22.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This theory was later revised, though,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:22.68,0:05:26.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when scholars noted\Nthe sculptor's obvious focus
Dialogue: 0,0:05:26.40,0:05:29.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,on the figurine's reproductive features:
Dialogue: 0,0:05:29.84,0:05:33.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,large breasts,\Nconsidered ideal for nursing;
Dialogue: 0,0:05:33.12,0:05:35.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,a round, possibly pregnant belly;
Dialogue: 0,0:05:35.76,0:05:39.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the remnants of red dye,\Nalluding to menstruation or birth.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:40.56,0:05:44.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They also assumed that she was\Nmeant to be held or placed lying down
Dialogue: 0,0:05:44.11,0:05:48.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because her tiny feet\Ndon't allow her to be freestanding.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:48.52,0:05:49.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She also had no face.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:50.80,0:05:54.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,For this reason, it was assumed\Nthat she was a representation of fertility
Dialogue: 0,0:05:54.92,0:05:57.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and not a portrait of a person.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:57.80,0:05:59.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She was an object.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:59.68,0:06:01.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In the history of her interpretation,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:01.52,0:06:04.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,she went from object\Nof ideal beauty and love
Dialogue: 0,0:06:04.68,0:06:06.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to object of reproduction.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:07.36,0:06:09.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I think this transition speaks more
Dialogue: 0,0:06:09.84,0:06:13.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,about the scholars\Nwho have interpreted her purpose
Dialogue: 0,0:06:13.64,0:06:17.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,than the actual purpose\Nof the figurine herself.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:18.36,0:06:20.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,When a woman becomes pregnant,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:20.48,0:06:24.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,she leaves the realm\Nof men's sexual desire
Dialogue: 0,0:06:24.24,0:06:28.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and slides into her reproductive\Nand child-rearing role.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:28.84,0:06:31.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In doing so, she also becomes
Dialogue: 0,0:06:31.48,0:06:33.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the property of the community,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:33.28,0:06:37.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,considered very important\Nbut only because she's pregnant. Right?
Dialogue: 0,0:06:38.32,0:06:40.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I've taken to calling this\Nthe Willendorf effect,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:40.84,0:06:44.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and once again we see it reinforced\Nin many aspects of her life.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:45.22,0:06:47.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Has anyone here\Never been visibly pregnant?
Dialogue: 0,0:06:47.76,0:06:48.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:06:48.100,0:06:50.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah. Lots of you, right?
Dialogue: 0,0:06:50.28,0:06:54.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So how many of you ever had a stranger\Ntouch your belly during pregnancy,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:54.44,0:06:57.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,maybe without even asking\Nyour permission first?
Dialogue: 0,0:06:57.80,0:07:00.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Or told what you can and cannot eat
Dialogue: 0,0:07:00.56,0:07:04.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,by somebody who is not your doctor,\Nyour medical care provider?
Dialogue: 0,0:07:04.20,0:07:07.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Or asked private questions\Nabout your birth plan?
Dialogue: 0,0:07:08.08,0:07:10.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then told why\Nthose choices are all wrong?
Dialogue: 0,0:07:11.56,0:07:12.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah, me too.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:12.80,0:07:17.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Or had a server refuse\Nto bring you a glass of wine?
Dialogue: 0,0:07:17.08,0:07:19.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This one might give you pause,\NI know, but stay with me.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:19.84,0:07:21.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is a huge secret.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:21.96,0:07:25.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It is actually safe to drink\Nin moderation during pregnancy.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:26.52,0:07:28.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Many of us don't know this
Dialogue: 0,0:07:28.08,0:07:31.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because doctors don't trust\Npregnant women with this secret --
Dialogue: 0,0:07:31.84,0:07:33.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:07:37.36,0:07:41.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,especially if she's less educated\Nor a woman of color.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:41.64,0:07:43.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What this tells us is,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:43.40,0:07:47.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,this Willendorf effect,\Nit's also classist and racist.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:47.64,0:07:53.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's present when\Nthe government reminds women
Dialogue: 0,0:07:53.56,0:07:56.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with every new anti-choice bill
Dialogue: 0,0:07:56.24,0:07:59.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that the contents of her uterus\Nare not her own,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:59.12,0:08:01.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or when an OBGYN says,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:01.20,0:08:03.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"While it's safe\Nto have sex during pregnancy,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:03.52,0:08:04.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,sometimes you never know.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:04.88,0:08:06.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Better safe than sorry, right?"
Dialogue: 0,0:08:07.40,0:08:11.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She's denied basic privacy\Nand bodily autonomy
Dialogue: 0,0:08:11.68,0:08:13.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,under the guise of "be a good mother."
Dialogue: 0,0:08:14.16,0:08:16.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We don't trust her\Nto make her own decisions.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:17.12,0:08:18.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She's cute, remember?
Dialogue: 0,0:08:21.80,0:08:24.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,When we tell women
Dialogue: 0,0:08:24.12,0:08:27.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that sexual pleasure -- excuse me.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:27.08,0:08:31.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,When we tell women that sex\Nisn't worth the risk during pregnancy,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:31.92,0:08:36.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,what we're telling her is that\Nher sexual pleasure doesn't matter.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:36.20,0:08:39.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So what we are telling her\Nis that she in fact doesn't matter,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:39.52,0:08:44.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,even though the needs of her fetus\Nare not at odds with her own needs.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:45.20,0:08:47.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So medical providers,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:47.48,0:08:50.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,such as the American College\Nof Obstetricians and Gynecologists
Dialogue: 0,0:08:50.48,0:08:55.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,have the opportunity to educate\Nabout the safety of sex during pregnancy.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:55.40,0:08:56.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So what do the experts say?
Dialogue: 0,0:08:57.76,0:09:00.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,ACOG actually has\Nno public official statement
Dialogue: 0,0:09:00.28,0:09:03.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,about the safety of sex during pregnancy.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:04.08,0:09:07.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Guidance from the Mayo Clinic\Nis generally positive
Dialogue: 0,0:09:07.12,0:09:09.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but presented with a caveat:
Dialogue: 0,0:09:09.64,0:09:12.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Although most women can safely\Nhave sex throughout pregnancy,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:12.81,0:09:14.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,sometimes it's best to be cautious."
Dialogue: 0,0:09:14.96,0:09:18.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Some women don't want\Nto have sex during pregnancy,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:18.08,0:09:19.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and that's OK.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:19.36,0:09:21.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Some women do want\Nto have sex during pregnancy,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:21.100,0:09:23.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and that's OK, too.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:23.44,0:09:26.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What needs to stop\Nis society telling women
Dialogue: 0,0:09:26.12,0:09:28.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,what they can and cannot do\Nwith their bodies.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:29.48,0:09:31.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Applause)
Dialogue: 0,0:09:36.04,0:09:40.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Pregnant women are not faceless,\Nidentity-less vessels of reproduction
Dialogue: 0,0:09:40.72,0:09:42.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who can't stand on their own two feet.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:44.12,0:09:46.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But the truth is, the real secret is,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:46.56,0:09:50.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we tell all women that\Ntheir sexual pleasure doesn't matter.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:50.84,0:09:54.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We refuse to even acknowledge\Nthat women who have sex with women
Dialogue: 0,0:09:54.08,0:09:56.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or women who don't\Nwant children even exist.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:56.84,0:09:58.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Oh, it's just a phase ...
Dialogue: 0,0:09:58.56,0:10:00.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,she just needs the right man\Nto come along."
Dialogue: 0,0:10:02.16,0:10:04.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Every time a women has sex
Dialogue: 0,0:10:04.52,0:10:06.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,simply because it feels good,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:06.52,0:10:08.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it is revolutionary.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:08.28,0:10:10.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She is revolutionary.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:10.48,0:10:13.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She is pushing back\Nagainst society's insistence
Dialogue: 0,0:10:13.08,0:10:15.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that she exist simply for men's pleasure
Dialogue: 0,0:10:15.32,0:10:16.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or for reproduction.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:18.44,0:10:22.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,A woman who prioritizes\Nher sexual needs is scary,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:22.44,0:10:27.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because a woman who prioritizes\Nher sexual needs prioritizes herself.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:27.60,0:10:31.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Applause)
Dialogue: 0,0:10:31.40,0:10:35.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That is a woman demanding\Nthat she be treated as an equal.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:35.84,0:10:37.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That is a woman who insists
Dialogue: 0,0:10:37.40,0:10:40.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that you make room for her\Nat the table of power,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:40.76,0:10:42.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and that is the most terrifying of all
Dialogue: 0,0:10:42.68,0:10:45.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because we can't make room for her
Dialogue: 0,0:10:45.52,0:10:49.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,without some of us giving up\Nthe extra space we hold.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:50.84,0:10:53.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Applause)
Dialogue: 0,0:10:56.48,0:10:58.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I have one last secret for you.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:58.96,0:11:00.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I am the mother of two boys
Dialogue: 0,0:11:00.84,0:11:02.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and we could use your help.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:03.32,0:11:08.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Even though my boys hear me say regularly
Dialogue: 0,0:11:08.04,0:11:11.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that it's important for men\Nto recognize women as equals
Dialogue: 0,0:11:11.60,0:11:14.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and they see their father modeling this,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:14.16,0:11:18.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we need what happens in the world\Nto reinforce what happens in our home.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:18.60,0:11:21.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is not a men's problem\Nor a women's problem.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:21.92,0:11:23.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is everyone's problem,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:23.52,0:11:27.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and we all play a role\Nin dismantling systems of inequality.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:28.52,0:11:31.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,For starters, we have got\Nto stop telling women
Dialogue: 0,0:11:31.16,0:11:33.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,what they can and cannot do\Nwith their bodies.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:33.60,0:11:36.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Applause)
Dialogue: 0,0:11:38.24,0:11:42.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This includes not treating pregnant women\Nlike community property.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:42.16,0:11:45.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If you don't know her,\Ndon't even ask to touch her belly.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:45.88,0:11:47.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You wouldn't anybody else.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:47.60,0:11:49.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Don't tell her\Nwhat she can and cannot eat.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:49.76,0:11:52.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Don't ask her private details\Nabout her medical decisions.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:52.80,0:11:54.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This also includes understanding
Dialogue: 0,0:11:54.72,0:11:57.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that even if you are\Npersonally against abortion,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:57.32,0:11:59.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you can still fight\Nfor a woman's right to choose.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:00.52,0:12:04.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,When it comes to women's equality,\Nthe two need not oppose one another.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:04.100,0:12:07.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If you're somebody who has sex with women,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:07.28,0:12:08.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,prioritize her pleasure.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:08.80,0:12:11.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If you don't know how, ask.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:12.08,0:12:13.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If you have children --
Dialogue: 0,0:12:13.60,0:12:15.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:12:15.56,0:12:19.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,have conversations about sex\Nas early as possible,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:19.36,0:12:23.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because kids don't look up s-e-x\Nin the dictionary anymore.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:23.76,0:12:25.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They look it up on the internet.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:26.36,0:12:29.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And when you're having\Nthose conversations about sex,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:29.80,0:12:31.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,don't center them on reproduction only.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:31.76,0:12:33.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,People have sex for many reasons,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:33.44,0:12:35.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,some because they want a baby,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:35.24,0:12:38.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but most of us have sex\Nbecause it feels good.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:38.20,0:12:39.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Admit it.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:40.80,0:12:43.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And regardless of whether\Nyou have children or not,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:43.40,0:12:47.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,support comprehensive sex education\Nthat doesn't shame our teenagers.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:47.68,0:12:50.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Applause)
Dialogue: 0,0:12:56.16,0:12:58.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Nothing positive comes from shaming teens
Dialogue: 0,0:12:58.76,0:13:01.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for their sexual desires, behaviors,
Dialogue: 0,0:13:02.16,0:13:05.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,other than positive STD\Nand pregnancy tests.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:06.64,0:13:09.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Every single day,\Nwe are all given the opportunity
Dialogue: 0,0:13:09.72,0:13:12.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to disrupt patterns of inequality.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:12.100,0:13:16.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I think we can all agree\Nthat it's worth the trouble to do so.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:17.24,0:13:18.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thank you.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:18.48,0:13:25.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Applause)