1
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Hi.

2
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Well, right here,

3
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these are my issues.

4
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Right? These are my issues.

5
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I mean, we all have them.

6
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The people sitting out here,
right next to you,

7
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we all have issues.

8
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You guys have issues up there too, right?

9
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And the problem is they get in the way.

10
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They get in the way
of us relating to one another,

11
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our issues.

12
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I'm working too, you know.

13
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I didn't speak to my mother 
for five years.

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It's not something I'm proud of.

15
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I've lost a lot of time
that I wish I could have now,

16
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that I'll never get back.

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And it was because of issues.

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It was because I had issues,
she had issues too,

19
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and even some of her issues 
she gave to me.

20
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So, we were sharing our issues
and they were in the middle.

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I didn't talk to her,
but she also didn't talk to me.

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Fortunately, though,

23
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fortunately, we were able to reconcile.

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Fortunately, we have a wonderful,

25
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healed and whole relationship today.

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And I'm very, very happy about that,

27
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because I'm also a mother
and a grandmother

28
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and I couldn't even bear the thought

29
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of being separated from my children
and my grandchildren

30
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for five years.

31
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So, some of these issues are personal

32
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and some of them are institutional.

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Some of them we can deal with,

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like my mother and I dealt with
because we had a relationship,

35
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we had an association, we were connected

36
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and, because of that initial connection,

37
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we could reconnect and rehabilitate

38
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our relationship.

39
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We had an affiliation.

40
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The problem with these issues

41
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when you look at the institutional brand,

42
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like racism, like sexism,

43
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is that they're way bigger
than the individual.

44
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And the way we tend
to sometimes want to deal with them

45
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is on an individual basis,

46
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like, we get all offended, right?

47
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We get all offended,
"The race card." Right?

48
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We get all offended 
and we take it personal

49
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the minute something comes up.

50
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Men and women do it with one another,

51
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racist people do it with one another,

52
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and the problem
is we don't have a relationship.

53
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So, this idea of reconciling,

54
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settling, compromising,
having a reunion --

55
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my mother and I have a reunion
every time we get together.

56
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That's because
we have a relationship, right?

57
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And even with the issues,

58
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we can step over them

59
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and deal with one another,

60
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because we have that relationship.

61
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Our problem 
with our institutional issues --

62
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this really came to me too:

63
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it's like you cannot redo something

64
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until you have first done it.

65
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You can't reconcile
if you haven't first "conciled", right?

66
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And conciliation is the process

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of winning over from a state of hostility.

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So, we have to first have a recognition

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that we've got issues between us,
and guess what?

70
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When you're talking about race,

71
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and racism and sexism,

72
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you're talking about legacy,

73
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you're talking about historic legacy,

74
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you're talking about issues
you don't even know you have,

75
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you're talking about issues
that were passed on to you

76
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just because of the ground
you're standing on.

77
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You don't even know about them,
but the idea is

78
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that, unless you recognize them,

79
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accept them, respect that we have
those issues between us,

80
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whether they're our fault
or not our fault --

81
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they're still between us --

82
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instead of denying that they exist,

83
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instead of not believing my story,

84
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instead of when I say,
"That hurt me and this is why",

85
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"No, it didn't."

86
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Yes, it did.

87
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It did because of our historic legacy.

88
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So, we have to first get to know
one another,

89
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we have to first "concile",

90
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bring those desperate pieces
back together, you know,

91
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or to gather for the first time,

92
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so that we can then have a relationship

93
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that then, if issues come up,

94
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then we can have a reconciliation.

95
00:05:03,771 --> 00:05:08,310
But first, we have to have a conciliation.

96
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I'm going to sort of put it into
a context, using a story.

97
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It's a West African fable

98
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and it's called
"The Truth and The Lie." Right?

99
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So, one day,

100
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The Truth went down to the river bank

101
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to bathe in the cool,
refreshing river water with The Lie.

102
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Now, Truth was always 
a little bit cautious

103
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whenever she was 
in the presence of The Lie,

104
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but, on this particular day,

105
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the Sun was out in all its glory.

106
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So, she went.

107
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Now, while Truth was down bathing
in the cool, refreshing river water,

108
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she didn't realize that The Lie

109
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had stolen away with all her clothes.

110
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So, while Truth was
in the middle of the river

111
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trying to figure out what to do,

112
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The Lie was parading
around the marketplace,

113
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dressed up like The Truth.

114
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Now finally, when Truth
got up enough courage

115
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to run down to the marketplace
wearing nothing but the truth...

116
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(Laughter)

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...no matter how hard she tried
to tell all the people

118
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that she was The Truth and he was The Lie,

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the people were so embarrassed

120
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to look upon the naked Truth

121
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that they believed The Lie dressed up
in Truth's clothes instead.

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And it is still the same to this day.

123
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The truth may be difficult to look upon,

124
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but it remains the truth, nonetheless.
Yeah?

125
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So, if you really care about
this common unity

126
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that we have going on today,

127
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you've got to do the work

128
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and "concile",

129
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so that you can some day
reconcile, all right?

130
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So, I'm just going to take my issues

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and go on, off the stage. (Laughter)

132
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Thank you.

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(Applause)