WEBVTT

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(bell)

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[How can you truly open yourself
towards others?

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(Bell)

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Dear Thay, 
dear Sangha,

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how can you truly be open with someone?

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There is fear to be rejected,
to be misunderstood,

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(Inaudible)

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How can you truly be
open yourself towards others?

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Misunderstanding, wrong perceptions

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are part of life,

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like the mud.

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Misunderstanding, wrong perceptions

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are the foundations of war and conflicts,

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death, suffering.

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That is the mud.

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And, the practice helps us to dissipate

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misunderstanding,
remove wrong perceptions,

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restore communication,

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and bring about reconciliation,

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transforming the mud into a lotus flower.

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This is possible,

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And, the teaching of the Buddha
can help us do this

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as a person,
as a group of people.

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And when you can do it
as a group of people,

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you can change the situation of society.

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And that is why to practice 
as an individual

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is not enough. You have to practice
as a group, as a sangha.

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There are those of us who are so afraid

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to love.

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We do not dare to open our heart.

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We are afraid, because we have suffered.

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And, we think that to love is to suffer.

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It is regrettable,

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because true love 
can bring a lot of healing and joy.

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There is a poet who wrote like this...

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"Spring has come,

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every flower is opening

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opening out, 
but why does my heart refuse to open?

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Because there is fear,

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the fear to suffer again,

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because we have 
not learned the art of loving.

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Of course, 
the other person is unskillful

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but we are also unskillful.

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We don't know how to love, yet.

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We allow misunderstanding, 
wrong perception to take over.

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And, we make us suffer, and

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we make each other suffer.

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So, the teaching of the Buddha on love,

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we should learn.

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The first element of true love is Maitri,

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loving kindness.

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And, true love should be able 
to bring happiness.

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Loving kindness is the energy 
that can bring happiness

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to us and to the other person.

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A love that cannot bring happiness,
is not love.

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It is something else -

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passion, craving, sensual pleasure,

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the desire to possess.

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It is not love.

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So, loving kindness is a kind of energy 
that we have to cultivate,

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If it is true love, 
then it should bring well being,

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happiness to us, 
and to the other person.

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And, how to cultivate

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loving kindness?

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To look, to have the time to look
and understand.

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Understanding the suffering,

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the difficulties, 
and the need of the other person

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the suffering and the difficulties,
and our own need.

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We need the time
to look into ourselves.

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We need to understand
our suffering, our difficulties,

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and the deep aspiration in us.

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And, we should be able to accept us 
as we are.

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So, understanding is the 
foundation of love,

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of loving kindness.

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We should ask: "Do I understand myself?"

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"Do I understand my suffering, 
my difficulties?

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If you understand your own suffering, 
your difficulties,

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you'll feel much better.

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You accept yourself.

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And, then, 
when you look at the other person

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you can understand his or her suffering 
much more easily

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So, the first step is to understand "self"

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and to accept "self".

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And, the second step is 
to understand the other

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and accept the other.

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Without that kind of understanding

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and acceptance, happiness is not possible.

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And, true love is to be cultivated.

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The second element of true love 
is compassion.

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Compassion is the energy that can heal.

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When you have compassion
in your heart you suffer much less.

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And, you open your heart so easily.

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Look at the other person deeply,

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and you see the suffering
in him or in her.

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That person is a victim 
of her own suffering,

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his own suffering.

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And, he does not know how to 
handle that suffering in him.

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He continues to suffer deeply, 
and he makes you suffer also

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not because he wants to.

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So, understanding the suffering
in that person,

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you are not angry at him or her any more.

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And, you want to do something, 
to say something

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to help that person suffer less.

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It means you have compassion in 
your heart.

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And, if when you want to do something, 
or to say something

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to help him or her suffer less,

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it means that 
compassion IS in your heart.

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And, as compassion is in your heart,

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you don't suffer anymore,

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because you have 
opened your heart to yourself

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and now, you can open your heart 
to him or to her.

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And, that is the second energy of 
true love: compassion, karuna.

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And, when you have a lot of karuna
its called mahakaruna,

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Great Compassion.

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You are a Bodhisattva,

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you are a buddha, because 
the compassion in you is so

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so large.

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Your heart includes not only him or her,

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but you include us all.

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Mahakaruna.

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And, mahakaruna, the energy of 
compassion, is to be cultivated.

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And, without getting 
in touch with the suffering,

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without understanding suffering,

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you cannot generate the energy of
karuna, compassion.

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When compassion is born, 
we begin to heal...

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heal you, and heal the world.

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And, with the practice of 
meditation on love

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metta, maitri meditation,

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karuna meditation,

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you suffer less.

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You begin to taste the nectar of love,

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and you open your heart 
so easily to the world!

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The third element of true love is joy.

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If your love does not bring joy to you

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and makes the other person cry

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all day long, it's not true love.

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So, the mark of true love is joy.

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And, joy is healing.

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And, the fourth element of true love

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is inclusiveness,

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openness.

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Inclusiveness means 
that you open your heart

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and allow that person 
to be inside of your heart.

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And, without opening your heart, 
how can you include her,

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include him in your heart?

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And, as you continue, your heart
grows bigger and bigger all the time.

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And, very soon, you include us,

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because you don't discriminate
against us anymore.

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Your heart is so large 
that you include us all.

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Include all of us in your heart.

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That is the love of a buddha

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which does not exclude anyone.

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Not only humans, but also
animals, plants and minerals.

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All are embraced in that love.

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That is equanimity.
That is non-discrimination.

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And, the Buddha's teaching on love
is very specific, very clear,

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concrete.

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And, if we practice,

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we cultivate these four elements,

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happiness begins to be with us right away.

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We don't need many months or years.

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The moment when we begin to practice 
maitri, karuna, mudita and upeksha

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happiness begins in our heart.

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We open our heart to ourselves,

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to him or to her, right away.

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(bell)

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(Bell)