[Script Info]
Title: 
[Events]
Format: Layer, Start, End, Style, Name, MarginL, MarginR, MarginV, Effect, Text
Dialogue: 0,0:00:01.15,0:00:03.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Interviewer: Your first time back on the TED Women stage.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:03.07,0:00:06.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Sheryl Sandberg: First time back. Nice to see everyone. It's always so nice to look out
Dialogue: 0,0:00:06.42,0:00:07.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and see so many women.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:07.72,0:00:08.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:08.52,0:00:11.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's so not my regular experience, as I know anyone else's
Dialogue: 0,0:00:11.90,0:00:18.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I: So when we first started talking about maybe the the subject wouldn't be social media,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:18.82,0:00:25.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which we assumed it would be, but that you had very much on your mind the missing leadership
Dialogue: 0,0:00:25.39,0:00:30.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,positions, particularly in the sector of technology and social media.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:30.46,0:00:36.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But how did that evolve for you as a thought, and end up being the TED Talk that you gave?
Dialogue: 0,0:00:36.53,0:00:39.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,SS: So I was really scared to get on this stage and talk about women,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:39.98,0:00:42.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because I grew up in the business world, as I think so many of us do,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:42.94,0:00:49.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you never talk about being a woman, because someone might notice thaty you're a woman, right?
Dialogue: 0,0:00:49.58,0:00:54.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They might notice. Or worse, if you say 'woman', people on the other end of the table think
Dialogue: 0,0:00:54.20,0:00:57.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you're asking for special treatment, or complaining, or worse,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:57.51,0:01:00.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,about to sue them. And so I went through -- (laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:01:00.37,0:01:04.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Right? I went through my entire business career, and never spoke about being a woman,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:04.86,0:01:09.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,never spoke about it publicly. But I also noticed that it wasn't working.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:09.40,0:01:13.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I came out of college over 20 years ago, and I thought that you know, look,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:13.79,0:01:16.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,all of my peerrs were men and women, all the people above me were all men, but that would change,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:16.93,0:01:22.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because your generation had done such an amazing job fighting for equality,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:22.63,0:01:26.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,equality was now ours for the taking. And it wasn't.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:26.41,0:01:29.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Because year after year, I was one of fewere and fewerm, and often,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:29.73,0:01:33.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the only woman in the room. And I talked to a bunch of people about,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:33.82,0:01:37.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,should I give at TED Women about women, and they said, oh no, no no.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:37.24,0:01:42.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It will end your business career. You cannot be a serious business business executive
Dialogue: 0,0:01:42.23,0:01:45.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and speak about being a woman. You'll never be taken seriously again.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:45.43,0:01:49.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But fortunatley , there were the proud, the few, who told me I should give this speech
Dialogue: 0,0:01:49.69,0:01:53.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I aske dmyself the question Mark Zuckerberg might --
Dialogue: 0,0:01:53.51,0:01:55.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the founder of Facebook and my boss --
Dialogue: 0,0:01:55.15,0:01:58.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,asked some of us, which is what would I do if I wasn't afraid?
Dialogue: 0,0:01:58.77,0:02:02.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And the answer to what would I do if I wasn't afraid is I would get on the TED stage,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:02.92,0:02:09.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and talk about women and leadership, and I did, and survived.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:09.93,0:02:14.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I would say, not only survived. I'm thinking of that moment, Sheryl,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:14.86,0:02:19.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when you and I were standing backstage together, and you turned to me,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:19.00,0:02:20.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and you told me a story.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:20.82,0:02:25.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I said, very last minute, you know, you really should share that story.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:25.18,0:02:26.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, yeah.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:26.19,0:02:27.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What was that story?
Dialogue: 0,0:02:27.31,0:02:29.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Well, it's an important part of the journey. I had -- TED Women --
Dialogue: 0,0:02:29.82,0:02:33.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the original one was in DC -- so I live here -- so I had gotten on a plane the day before
Dialogue: 0,0:02:33.54,0:02:38.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and my daughter was three, she was clinging to my leg, Mommy, don't go.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:38.39,0:02:42.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And Pat's a friend, so not related to the speech I was planning on giveing,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:42.18,0:02:45.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which was chock full of facts and figures, nothing personal,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:45.48,0:02:51.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I told Pat the story. Well, I'm having a hard day, yesterday my daughter was clinging to my leg,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:51.02,0:02:53.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and "don't go." And you looked at me and said,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:53.22,0:02:57.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you have to tell that story. I said, on the TED stage? Are you kidding?
Dialogue: 0,0:02:57.39,0:03:00.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm going to get on a stage and admit my daughter was clinging to my leg?
Dialogue: 0,0:03:00.24,0:03:03.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And you said yes, because if you want to talk about getting more women into leadership roles,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:03.95,0:03:07.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you have to be honest about how hard it is.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:07.02,0:03:11.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I did. And I think that's a really important part of the journey
Dialogue: 0,0:03:11.74,0:03:16.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The same thing happened when I wrote my book. I wrote a first chapter,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:16.88,0:03:21.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I thought it was fabulous. It was chock-full of data and figures,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:21.44,0:03:27.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I had three pages on matrilineal tribes, and what the patterns are of their --
Dialogue: 0,0:03:27.87,0:03:30.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,their sociological patterns -- my husband read it.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:30.55,0:03:33.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He was like, this is like eating your Wheaties.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:33.23,0:03:40.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No one -- and I apologize to Wheaties if there's someone -- no one, no one will read this book.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:40.71,0:03:45.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I realized throught the proces s that I had to be more honest and more open,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:45.88,0:03:50.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I had to tell my stories. My stories of still not feeling as self-confident as I should,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:50.60,0:03:56.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in many situations. My first and failed marriage. Crying at work.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:56.25,0:04:00.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Felling I didn't belong there, and feeling guilty to this day.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:00.47,0:04:04.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And part o fmy journey, starting on this stage, going to lean in, going to Foundation,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:04.96,0:04:08.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is all about being more open and honest about those challenges,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:08.79,0:04:10.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so that other women can be more open, honest,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:10.61,0:04:14.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and all of us can work together towards equality.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:14.24,0:04:17.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I: I think that one of the most striking parts about the book,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:17.77,0:04:23.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and in my opinion, one of the reason's it's hit such a nerve and is resonating around the world,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:23.63,0:04:29.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is that you are personal in the book, and that you do make it clear that,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:29.25,0:04:33.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,while you've observed some things that are very important for other women to know,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:33.46,0:04:38.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that you've had the same challenges that many others of us have,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:38.03,0:04:44.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,as you faced the hurdles and the barriers and possibly the people who don't believe the same.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:44.75,0:04:49.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So talk about that process: deciding that you go public with the private part,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:49.52,0:04:53.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and then you would also put yourself in the position of something of an expert
Dialogue: 0,0:04:53.53,0:04:56.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,on how to resolve those challenges.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:56.30,0:04:57.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:57.32,0:05:00.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,SS: After I did the TED Talk, what happened was --
Dialogue: 0,0:05:00.02,0:05:02.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you know, I never expected to write a book, I'm not an author, I'm not a writer,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:02.54,0:05:07.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and it was viewed a lot, and it really started impacting people's lives.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:07.31,0:05:10.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I got this great --- one of the first letters I got was from a woman
Dialogue: 0,0:05:10.77,0:05:16.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who said that she was offered a really big promotion at work, and she turned it down,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:16.08,0:05:19.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and she told her very best friend she turned it down, and she said "you really need to watch this TED Talk."
Dialogue: 0,0:05:19.79,0:05:24.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And so she watched this TED Talk, and she went back the next day, she took the job,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:24.52,0:05:28.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,she went home, and she handed her husband the grocery list.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:28.44,0:05:30.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And she said, I can do this.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:30.83,0:05:34.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And what really mattered to me was it wasn't just women in the corporate world,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:34.17,0:05:36.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,even though I did hear from a lot of them, and it did impact a lot of them,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:36.95,0:05:41.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it was also people of all different circumstancecs.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:41.00,0:05:44.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There was a doctor I met who was an attending physician at Johns HOpkins,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:44.53,0:05:48.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and he said that until he saw my TED Talk, it never really occurred to him
Dialogue: 0,0:05:48.16,0:05:50.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that even though half of the students in his med school classes were women,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:50.70,0:05:53.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,they weren't speaking as much as the men as he did his rounds.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:53.26,0:05:59.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So he started paying attention, and as he waited for raised hands, he realized the men's hands were up.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:59.56,0:06:03.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So he started encouraging the women to raise their hands more. Right?
Dialogue: 0,0:06:03.75,0:06:04.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And it still didn't work.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:04.72,0:06:06.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So he told everyone, no more hand raising, I'm cold-calling.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:06.69,0:06:10.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So he could call evenly on men and women. And what he proved to himself
Dialogue: 0,0:06:10.40,0:06:13.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,was that the women knew the answers just as well or better,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:13.37,0:06:16.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and he was able to go back to them and tell them that. And then, you know,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:16.56,0:06:21.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,there was the woman, stay-at-home mom, lives in a really difficult neighborhood,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:21.20,0:06:24.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,not a great school, she said that TED Talk -- she's never had a corporate job,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:24.68,0:06:30.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but that TED Talk inspired her to go to that school and fight for a better teacher for her child.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:30.34,0:06:34.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I guess what's part of finding my own voice
Dialogue: 0,0:06:34.13,0:06:39.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I realize that other women and men could find thier own voice through it,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:39.04,0:06:41.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which is why I went from that talk to the book.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:41.61,0:06:47.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I: And in the book, you not only found your voice, which is clear and strong in the book,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:47.80,0:06:51.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but you also share what you've learned --
Dialogue: 0,0:06:51.49,0:06:54.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the experiences of other people in the lessons.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:54.60,0:06:59.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And that's what I'm thinking about in terms of putting yourself in a --
Dialogue: 0,0:06:59.37,0:07:03.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you became a sort of expert in how you lean in.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:03.89,0:07:08.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So what did that feel like, and become like in your life?\N
Dialogue: 0,0:07:08.31,0:07:13.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,To launch not just a book, not just a best-selling, best-viewed talk,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:13.99,0:07:19.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but a movement, where people begin to literally describe their actions at work as
Dialogue: 0,0:07:19.81,0:07:22.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"I'm leaning in."
Dialogue: 0,0:07:22.76,0:07:29.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,SS: I mean, I'm grateful, I'm honored, I'm happy, and it's the very beginning.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:29.99,0:07:34.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So I don't know if I'm an expert or if anyone [???]. I certainly have done a lot of research
Dialogue: 0,0:07:34.50,0:07:38.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I have read every study, I have pored over all the materials,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:38.00,0:07:40.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the lessons are very clear. Because here's what we know:
Dialogue: 0,0:07:40.94,0:07:46.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,what we know is that stereotypes are holding women back from leadership roles all over the world.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:46.00,0:07:48.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's so striking, Lean In's very global, I've been all over the world,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:48.76,0:07:51.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,talking about it, and -- cultures are so different.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:51.20,0:07:56.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Even in our own country, to Japan, and to Korea, to China, to Asia, Europe,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:56.04,0:07:59.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,they' re so different, except for one thing: gender.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:59.98,0:08:02.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,All over the wolrd, no matter what our cultures are,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:02.42,0:08:06.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we think men snould be strong, assertive, aggressive, ahve voice,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:06.45,0:08:10.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we think women should speak when spoken to, help others.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:10.74,0:08:14.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now how -- you know, I've asked -- we have all over the world
Dialogue: 0,0:08:14.70,0:08:18.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,women are called "bossy." There is a word for "bossy"
Dialogue: 0,0:08:18.50,0:08:20.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for little girls, in every language there's one.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:20.61,0:08:23.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's a word that's pretty much not used for little boys,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:23.10,0:08:25.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because if a little boy leads, there's no negative word for it,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:25.89,0:08:30.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's expected. But if a little girl leads, she's bossy.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:30.85,0:08:33.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now I know there aren't a lot of men here, but bear with me.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:33.07,0:08:35.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If you're a man, you'll have to represent your gender.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:35.55,0:08:39.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Please raise your hand if you've been told you're too aggressive at work.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:39.47,0:08:40.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There's always a few, it runs about 5%. Now get ready, gentlemen --
Dialogue: 0,0:08:40.69,0:08:51.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If you're a woman, please raise your hand if you've ever been told you're too aggressive at work.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:51.88,0:08:56.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughter) That is what audiences have said in every country in the world,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:56.80,0:08:59.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and it's deeply supported by the data.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:59.76,0:09:04.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now, do we think women are more aggressive than men? Of course not.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:04.15,0:09:06.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's just that we judge them through a different lens,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:06.57,0:09:11.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and a lot of the character traits that you must exhibit to perform at work, to get results, to lead,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:11.00,0:09:13.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,are ones that we think, in a man, he's the boss.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:13.70,0:09:16.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And in a woman, she's bossy.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:16.11,0:09:19.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And the good news about this is that we can change this by acknowledging it.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:19.78,0:09:22.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,One of the happiest moments I had in this whole journey
Dialogue: 0,0:09:22.48,0:09:27.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is, after the book came out, I stood on a stage with John Chambers, the chairman of Cisco,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:27.24,0:09:31.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He read the book. He stood on stage with me, invited me in front of his whole management team,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:31.29,0:09:34.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,men and women, and he said, I thought we were good at this. I thought that I was good at this.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:34.96,0:09:39.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then I read this book, and I realized that we -- my company --
Dialogue: 0,0:09:39.19,0:09:41.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we have called all of our senior women too aggressive,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:41.33,0:09:43.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I'm standing on this stage, and I'm sorry.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:43.81,0:09:47.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I want you to know we're never going to do it again.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:47.05,0:09:47.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I: Wow.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:47.77,0:09:50.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Can leave Sinbad [???] to a lot of other people.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:50.54,0:09:54.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,SS: So John is doing that because he believes it's good for his company.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:54.85,0:09:58.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So this kind of acknowledgement of these biases can change it.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:58.11,0:10:01.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And so next time you all see someone call a little girl bossy,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:01.14,0:10:04.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you'll walk right up to that person, big smile, and say
Dialogue: 0,0:10:04.13,0:10:09.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that little girl's not bossy. That little girl has executive leadership skills.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:09.10,0:10:13.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I: I know that's what you're telling your daughter.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:13.37,0:10:19.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And you did focus in the book, and you said that your reason in writing it was to create a dialogue about this.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:19.27,0:10:22.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I mean, let's just put it out there, face the fact that women are,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:22.27,0:10:26.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in a time when we have more open doors, and more opportunities,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:26.10,0:10:29.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,are still not getting to the leadership positions.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:29.25,0:10:31.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So in the months that have come since the book,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:31.63,0:10:34.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in which Lean In focussed on that and said,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:34.13,0:10:38.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,here are some of the challenges that remain, and many of them we have to own within ourselves
Dialogue: 0,0:10:38.61,0:10:41.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and look at ourselves. What has changed?
Dialogue: 0,0:10:41.24,0:10:43.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Have you seen changes?
Dialogue: 0,0:10:43.24,0:10:45.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,SS: Well, there's certainly more dialogue, which is great.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:45.71,0:10:48.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But what really matters to me, and I think all of us, is action.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:48.62,0:10:51.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So everywhere I go, CEOs, they;'re mostly men, say to me,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:51.99,0:10:54.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you're costing me so much money.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:54.25,0:10:57.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Because all of the women want to be paid as much as the men.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:57.87,0:11:00.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And to them I say, I'm not sorry at all.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:00.86,0:11:05.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,At all. I mean, the women should be paid as much as the men.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:05.65,0:11:08.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Everywhere I go, women tell me they ask for raises.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:08.91,0:11:12.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Everywhere I go, women say they're getting better relationships with their spouses,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:12.95,0:11:16.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,asking for more help at home, asking for the promotions they should be getting at work,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:16.84,0:11:19.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and importantly, believing it themselves. Even little things.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:19.75,0:11:23.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,One of the governors of one of the states told me that he didn't realize that more women were, in fact,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:23.84,0:11:26.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,literally sitting on the side of the room, which they are,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:26.28,0:11:30.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and now he made a rule that all the women on his staff need to sit at the table.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:30.76,0:11:33.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The foundation I started along with the book Lean In
Dialogue: 0,0:11:33.67,0:11:37.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,helps women, or men, start circles -- small groups,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:37.56,0:11:39.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,can be 10, can be however much you want, which meet once a month
Dialogue: 0,0:11:39.65,0:11:43.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I would have hope that by now, we'd have about 500 circles. That would've been great.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:43.74,0:11:46.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You know, 500 times roughly 10.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:46.56,0:11:50.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There are over 12,000 circles in 50 countries in the world.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:50.60,0:11:51.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I: Wow.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:51.56,0:11:54.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,SS: And these are people who are meeting every single month.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:54.50,0:11:56.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I met one of them, I was in Beijing.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:56.96,0:12:01.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,A group of women, they're all about 29 or 30, they started the first Lean In circle in Beijing,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:01.32,0:12:05.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,several of them grew up in very poor, rural China.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:05.15,0:12:11.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,These women are 29, they are told by their society that they are "left over,"
Dialogue: 0,0:12:11.72,0:12:13.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because they are not yet married,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:13.41,0:12:16.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the process of coming together on a month at meeting
Dialogue: 0,0:12:16.92,0:12:19.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is helping them define who they are for themselves.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:19.34,0:12:22.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What they want in their careers. The kind of partners they want, if at all.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:22.16,0:12:25.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I looked at them, we went around and introduced ourselves,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:25.97,0:12:27.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and they all said their names and where they're from,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:27.67,0:12:31.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I said, I 'm Sheryl Sandberg, and this was my dream.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:31.15,0:12:33.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I kind of just started crying.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:33.89,0:12:34.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I: Right.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:34.61,0:12:36.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,SS: Which, I admit, I do. I've talked about it before.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:36.86,0:12:42.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But the fact that a woman so far away in the world, who grew up in a rural village,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:42.15,0:12:45.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who's being told to marry someone she doesn't want to marry
Dialogue: 0,0:12:45.82,0:12:49.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,can now go meet once a month with a group of people and refuse that.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:49.38,0:12:52.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And find life on her own terms.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:52.06,0:12:54.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's the kind of change we have to hope for.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:54.30,0:12:58.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I: Have you been surprised by the global nature of the message?\N
Dialogue: 0,0:12:58.21,0:13:00.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Because I think when the book first came out, many people thought,
Dialogue: 0,0:13:00.86,0:13:04.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,well, this is a really important handbook for young women on their way up.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:04.62,0:13:08.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They need to look at this and anticipate the barriers, recognize them,
Dialogue: 0,0:13:08.96,0:13:11.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,put them out in the open, have the dialogue about it,
Dialogue: 0,0:13:11.73,0:13:16.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but it's really for women who are that. Doing that. Pursuing the corporate world.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:16.81,0:13:20.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And yet the book is being read, as you say, in rural and developing countries.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:20.85,0:13:21.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,SS: Yeah.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:21.79,0:13:27.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I: What part of that has surprised you, and perhaps led to a new perspective on your part?
Dialogue: 0,0:13:27.73,0:13:31.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,SS: The book is about self-confidence, and about equality.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:31.52,0:13:35.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And it turns out, everywhere in the world, women need more self-confidence,
Dialogue: 0,0:13:35.57,0:13:37.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because the world tell us we're not equal to men.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:37.74,0:13:41.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Everywhere in the world, we live in a world where the men get "and,"
Dialogue: 0,0:13:41.20,0:13:42.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the women get "or."
Dialogue: 0,0:13:42.75,0:13:46.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I've never met a man who's been asked how he does it all.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:46.11,0:13:49.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Again, I'm going to turn to the men in the audience:
Dialogue: 0,0:13:49.40,0:13:52.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,please raise your hand if you've been asked, how do you do it all?
Dialogue: 0,0:13:52.13,0:13:53.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:13:53.90,0:13:55.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Men only.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:55.28,0:13:59.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Women, please raise your hand if you've been asked how you do it all?
Dialogue: 0,0:13:59.41,0:14:06.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We assume men can do it all, slash -- have jobs and children.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:06.40,0:14:08.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We assume women can't, and that's ridiculous,
Dialogue: 0,0:14:08.34,0:14:12.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because the great majority of women everywhere in the world, including the United States,
Dialogue: 0,0:14:12.03,0:14:14.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,work full time and have children.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:14.14,0:14:19.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I think people don't fully understand how broad the message is.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:19.33,0:14:23.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There is a circle that's been started for rescued sex workers in Miami.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:23.83,0:14:28.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They're using Lean In to help people make the transition
Dialogue: 0,0:14:28.29,0:14:32.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,back to twhat would be a fair life, really rescuing them from their pimps
Dialogue: 0,0:14:32.98,0:14:37.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and using it. There are dress-for-success groups in Texas which ar eusing the book.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:37.53,0:14:39.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,For women who have never been to college,
Dialogue: 0,0:14:39.28,0:14:43.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and we know there are groups all the way to Ethiopia.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:43.15,0:14:48.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And so these messages of equality -- of how women are told they can't have what men can have --
Dialogue: 0,0:14:48.82,0:14:53.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,how we assume that leadership is for men, how we assume that voice is for men,
Dialogue: 0,0:14:53.28,0:14:57.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,these affect all of us, and I think they are very universal.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:57.68,0:14:58.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And it's part of what TED Women does.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:58.59,0:15:02.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It unities all of us in a cause we have to believe in,
Dialogue: 0,0:15:02.05,0:15:06.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which is more women, more voice, more equality.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:06.17,0:15:12.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I: If you were invited now to make another TED Women talk,
Dialogue: 0,0:15:12.92,0:15:18.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,what would you say that, as a result of this experience, for you personally,
Dialogue: 0,0:15:18.02,0:15:20.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and what you learned about women, and men,
Dialogue: 0,0:15:20.90,0:15:22.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,as you've made this journey?
Dialogue: 0,0:15:22.72,0:15:27.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,SS: I think I would sya -- I tried to say this strongly,
Dialogue: 0,0:15:27.60,0:15:30.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but I think I can say it more strongly --
Dialogue: 0,0:15:30.08,0:15:33.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I want to say that the status quo is not enough.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:33.38,0:15:36.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That it's not good enough, that it's not changing quickly enough.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:36.35,0:15:41.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Since I gave my TED Talk and publishe dmy book, another year of data came out from the U.S. Censue
Dialogue: 0,0:15:41.54,0:15:43.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And you know what we found?
Dialogue: 0,0:15:43.09,0:15:45.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No movement in the wage gap for women in the United States.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:45.89,0:15:48.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,77 cents to the dollar.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:48.62,0:15:50.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If you are a black woman, 64 cents.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:50.76,0:15:53.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If you are a Latina, we're at 54 cents.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:53.08,0:15:55.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Did you know when the last time those numbers went up?
Dialogue: 0,0:15:55.48,0:15:57.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,2002.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:57.96,0:16:02.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We are stagnating, wwe are stagnating in so many ways.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:02.75,0:16:05.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I think we are not really being honest about that.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:05.57,0:16:08.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for so many reasons. It's so hard ot talk ablut gender.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:08.72,0:16:12.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We shy away from the word feminist, a word I really think we need to embrace.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:12.51,0:16:15.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We have to get rid of the word bossy and bring back --
Dialogue: 0,0:16:15.92,0:16:19.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(applause)
Dialogue: 0,0:16:19.12,0:16:23.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I think I would say in a louder voice, we need to get rid of the word bossy
Dialogue: 0,0:16:23.28,0:16:25.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and bring back the word feminist, because we need it.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:25.79,0:16:28.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,
Dialogue: 0,0:16:28.74,0:16:29.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(applause and cheers)
Dialogue: 0,0:16:29.49,0:16:31.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I: And we all need to do a lot more leaning in.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:31.65,0:16:32.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,SS: A lot more leaning in.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:32.71,0:16:33.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I: Thank you, Sheryl.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:33.65,0:16:35.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thanks for leaning in and saying yes.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:35.01,0:16:36.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,SS: Thank you.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:36.85,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(applause)