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(music)

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I had my brother in my hand and all of a sudden my hand was empty.

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(music)

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Xzavier is now 8 and we call him X. He is to us the mighty X man.

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Yes. X as a little person, from the time that he hit the floor in the morning

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until you had to forcefully almost tie him down at night,

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he was running back and forth, back and forth, extremely energetic.

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He could call football plays. He loved the Green Bay Packers.

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I can turn the game on and sit him in front of it and do house chores.

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You know most people sit their babies in front of Sesame Street.

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I could sit X in front of a game.

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(music)

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He would have been an excellent athlete.

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I was always looking forward to being in the stand screaming X, X, X, X, X.

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That was mom's dream, to be screaming from a football stands.

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(music)

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He's just arriving from school now. I got to have him back.

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I got to know how school went. I got to know today's Friday,

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so I need to know if he got 106 on his spelling test, which is almost always does.

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(music)

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X is paralyzed from the diaphragm down.

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In the accident part of his spinal cord was dissipated.

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His legs are gone. His chair are his legs now. The use of his right hand is partial.

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He woke up actually from the coma a lefty and he went in a righty.

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She missed his brain stem by that much. X is on life support.

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The ventilator has to breathe for my son.

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(music)

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Most nights, I'm here on the couch listening for the ventilator.

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Listening to, making sure all the breaths are right. That his PEEP doesn't change.

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That he doesn't need suctioning during the night. I hear everything.

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I hear everything. I can hear the ventilator change cycles.

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I could hear just the breath sounds different and run down the stairs

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and the nurse goes, "He's good mom, He's good. Boy, you got good ears".

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(music)

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There are times when the pain is so bad I can't breathe.

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I want to say the worse thing that I can say to X,

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which I used to be able to say all the time, "Go in the yard and play".

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I can't say that anymore. Because if we go play,

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we need to take the suction machine,

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we need to transfer him over to the ventilator before his chair,

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before we can do anything. We need to do that first. It's a production.

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I cant' say go play.

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Any mother understands. I can't say go play.

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(music)

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He comes to life when she comes in the room.

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X doesn't remember as well as both Aurie and I do .

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But Aurie was walking across the street with Xzavier on that October day.

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Beep...Beep...Beep.. Beep.. Beep..

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We pray that that doesn't happen to another brother sister.

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We pray that another child doesn't get taken from a family member's hand.

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(music)

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She came from this direction and at first, we didn't event see her.

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The cars on the other side of the stop sign,

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they stepped off the curb coming across the street and Aurie said he was gone.

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She took him from Aurie's hand.

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(music)

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She was not only speeding in the school zone

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but she had also ran the stop sign because she was texting.

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The lady who hit X was texting. Texting. Her head was in her lap.

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She never even saw X in front of her.

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She actually came straight through the stop sign,

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there were no brake marks, no skid marks at all.

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She never stopped at a 4-way stop sign.

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She never stopped. You know, I 'm told the text was "I'm on my way".

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Did she make it. Did she get to where she was going on time.

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That would be my question for her.

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I felt like it was just a dream.

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(music)

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And for weeks it did. It felt I would wake up and I just think,

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did I dream that accident.

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(music)

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I'm just a guy, you know, I'm just young guy. I got a wife,

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you know a daughter on the way.

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I just a guy, this couldn't have happened to me, that can't be real.

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I had to have just dreamed that.

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(music)

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Memories, you know, what you saw that day.

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You know, they come back at different points.

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You know, I'll be somewhere and see an Amish family or see an Amish

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and it will bring back memories of the accident.

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(music)

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This was the last text message I sent before I

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caused an accident that killed 3 people.

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The Amish family was on their way. 8:00 in the morning that day

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and then the van was driven by a young man from Bluffton, Chandler Gerber.

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He was on his way to a job. He cleaned carpets at the time

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and he was traveling about the speed limit.

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We determined he was not speeding or anything like that, just traveling along.

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And he overtook the Amish right over there, just right where my car is

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and basically hit the Amish buggy from behind.

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And just ended up all way to the point of where my car is about 400 feet,

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430 feet where he ended up, where the van ended up.

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I was heading east right into the sun rise, driving along.

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As I was driving. I was texting back and forth with my wife.

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I was texting and I think I was reading a text back at the time of the accident

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because I remember driving and like my head just snapped up

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when I saw the windshield just, glass broke and screeching and my head.

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It happened in about a second, I mean I had a thousand thoughts

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going through my mind and I start coming to a stop.

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I saw a body come down off the top of the van and I just thought

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"oh my gosh, what have I done?" "What have I done?"

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And I realized I hit something and then I realized it was an Amish buggy.

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I jumped out of the van; Totally silent outside the van.

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At that second in time, there was no one else coming or going.

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I walked around back and I looked in the ditch

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and there were bodies just laying there. I mean it was just silent, it was quiet.

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The only sound I hear was, only thing I saw moving was the horse.

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It was severely wounded. It was kind of moving around on the ground a little bit.

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I remember the mother was laying, I believe, face down on her hands

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and knees like she's been sitting on a chair

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and it's just the force just hit her she didn't have time to move,

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she was sitting in that same position on the ground.

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And I just remember just staring and no one else around except me

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and the family that was laying in the ditch and the horse and just silent.

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You have all kinds of chaos here.

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This is the van that was driven by Chandler Gerber.

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As you can see, the front of the vehicle is just totally smashed here.

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He was devastated. He was crying. He was just almost in a panic mode.

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I knew that I've been texting and driving.

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I knew that I've been around that time involved with

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reading my phone or texting or what have you.

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I was hysterical. I was I think I was probably in shock.

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I was sitting in the van in the passenger seat

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taking in as far as I can see straight ahead, just lights and sirens and people.

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And I saw a hearse drive by and so right then

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I had this sinking feeling that there was at least one dead person.

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They took 2 young children it was a 3 year old and a 5 year old.

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They took a 17 year son.

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I saw the youngest of the children, 3 year old Inis..

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He was laying face down in the ditch right here just to our side,

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right behind, right in front of me here actually.

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He looked like he was asleep until we rolled him over

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and saw all the injuries to his face.

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Injuries to his legs, they looked like they were both broken. It was very devastating.

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(music)

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Shortly after the accident, it was pretty rough.

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A lot of tears, a lot of why did this happen?

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(music)

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This note was from Martin Swartz, the father of the children

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that had passed away from my accident.

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It says, Dear Ones, Trusting in God's ways, How does this find you?

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Hope all in good health and in good cheer.

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Around here we're all on the go and trying to make the best we can.

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I always wonder if we take enough time with our children.

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Wishing you the best with your little one and the unknown future.

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I think of you often. Keep looking up. God is always there.

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Sincerely, Martin and Mary Swartz.

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(music)

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I just I wish, I wish so bad I can go back to that day and change my focus.

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I wish I can go back and say,

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"You know, I can do these texts when I get to my stop, when I get there.

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I don't have to do this right now while I'm driving."

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You know, there's just nothing that important. But at that point,

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you know, it was just, oh I can text and drive, it's no big deal.

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And it is a big deal. Please, please don't do it. Please don't ever text and drive.

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It's life, you get one chance and you live with the choice you make.

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(music)

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She has no life really. Her balance is off, her arms don't work very well.

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She likes to watch the boats going up and down the river. She's got double vision.

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She can't see very well. It's very hard for her. She cannot leave this yard.

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We put up a fence in her backyard so she wouldn't roll down the bank into the river.

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She loves feeding her birds; taking care of the wildlife that comes around.

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She had her life planned she was always planning everything.

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Now she can't plan anything, because she can't remember anything.

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Debbie was very active, outgoing...she worked 60+ hours a week.

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She held a very good position, traveling all over the world.

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Going to Istanbul, Turkey and travelling to France and loving, working for her job.

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They love Debbie very, very much.

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Now she's dependant on everybody: myself, my brother, friends...

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She cannot go into the front of the yard by herself because her vision.

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(music)

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180
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It was a Sunday night, August 7th, approximately 9:15,

181
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my sister had come out of her house to get her mail.

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By the big pine tree she was struck by a teenager texting and driving.

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The white mail box is where my sister was struck,

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was carried on the hood of the car, right over here,

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and this is where the neighbors found her.

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When she was in the hospital she was swollen from head to toe.

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She had a shunt sticking out of her head right here to

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relieve pressure in her brain because her brain was so swollen.

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Her eyes, her right eye was swollen shut. Her face was swollen.

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Her neck was broken. Both her arms were broken. Her ribs were broken.

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Her pelvis was smashed. She had a broken ankle and a broken leg.

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Her thumb ripped off...almost ripped off they sewed it back together.

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It was terrible, it was heartbreaking.

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She was in her coma and I went up to her and I started talking to her.

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I had her hand and she squeezed my hand, she knew I was there.

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I told her, I said, "Debbie, I know you're in there

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and I know you can't talk or anything but I know you're in there."

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She gave me another squeeze of my hand

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and she knew I was talking to her. She could feel it.

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(music)

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Her sentence was 30 days in jail. She got 5 months of house arrest,

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500 hours of community service and that's about it.

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My sister doesn't want anything to do with her.

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She's too angry right now and I don't think that anger

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is going to go away anytime soon.

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Charlie is the big chocolate lab right here.

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He was 11 years old when he was killed. Charlie was about 115 lbs...

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We're working on my sister and then somebody said, "Where's Debbie's dog?"

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That's when the search went out and they found him over there in the trees.

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The mail box, the blue mail box had been knocked out.

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We think he was thrown through the air and knocked that mailbox down.

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He took the full force of the car.

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(dog growls)

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He laid on the side of the road, the neighbors told us,

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wagging his tail while Debbie was being loaded up in the ambulance.

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Its just not right my sister's life has been changed forever.

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She went from being active to inactive. In a stroke of a second.

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It's over. Her life as she knew it is over. She loved work.

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She helped me with my children, she was always there for me.

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It's heartbreaking everyday to see my sister like this

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when you knew how she was before.

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I love you.

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(music)

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I'm very fond of telescopes.

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Its just a reminder of my father in the good times we used to have.

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The telescope is just another way I look at him

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being a scientist and the brilliant man he was.

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At night we would go out side and look at the stars

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and he would tell me the different constellations and we would learn them.

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When there were meteor showers he would come

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and wake me up at 3 o clock in the morning

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and he would take me outside and we would stare

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and watch the meteor showers for hours.

239
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Just me and my Dad wrapped up outside in blankets.

240
00:21:55,362 --> 00:22:00,805
It was just a phenomenal feeling, just good Father/Daughter time for us.

241
00:22:00,805 --> 00:22:05,321
The best father I could have ever asked for.

242
00:22:05,321 --> 00:22:09,890
Growing up I was pretty typical, played a lot of sports growing up,

243
00:22:09,890 --> 00:22:14,262
played basketball, played football, played baseball, ran track...

244
00:22:14,262 --> 00:22:16,867
I'm quiet on the phone. I'm awkward on the phone.

245
00:22:16,867 --> 00:22:24,974
I have always preferred to text or talk in person.

246
00:22:24,974 --> 00:22:28,589
I'm a cowboy I guess and I'm a child of the mountains.

247
00:22:28,589 --> 00:22:32,130
I recently took a trip out to the prairie and it was pretty

248
00:22:32,130 --> 00:22:35,657
but I'm a child of the mountains and I need mountains around me.

249
00:22:35,657 --> 00:22:40,438
Every morning I get up and watch the sun come up over this mountain to the east.

250
00:22:40,438 --> 00:22:42,946
It's a beautiful mountain and I watch the sun

251
00:22:42,946 --> 00:22:46,482
go down in the west over another pretty mountain.

252
00:22:46,482 --> 00:22:49,597
So I'm not the much into technology as a blacksmith all your problems

253
00:22:49,597 --> 00:22:53,730
can be solved with a bigger hammer; the more heat and a bigger hammer.

254
00:22:53,730 --> 00:22:57,049
So I'm not much of a technology guy, and I never liked texting

255
00:22:57,049 --> 00:22:59,452
and since that day I liked it even less.

256
00:22:59,452 --> 00:23:05,049
I text often...daily I keep in touch with friends and family.

257
00:23:05,049 --> 00:23:08,488
The car doing the texting was going this direction.

258
00:23:08,488 --> 00:23:12,903
The two engineers were heading out this way

259
00:23:12,903 --> 00:23:16,680
and as they passed they brushed each other,

260
00:23:16,680 --> 00:23:20,244
which spun the little blue car with the engineers...

261
00:23:20,244 --> 00:23:29,106
spun it around this way into the path of an oncoming pickup.

262
00:23:29,106 --> 00:23:33,261
There's about a 15 or 16 mile stretch of highway 30 going to Logan.

263
00:23:33,261 --> 00:23:39,277
From the time we started on that stretch of road headed towards Logan,

264
00:23:39,277 --> 00:23:41,363
the driver ahead of me was distracted

265
00:23:41,363 --> 00:23:46,051
he crossed over the center line multiple times.

266
00:23:46,051 --> 00:23:51,667
It was early in the morning, It was still fairly dark outside.

267
00:23:51,667 --> 00:23:53,357


268
00:23:53,357 --> 00:23:58,122
It was raining pretty bad and I'm on the way to work, texting,

269
00:23:58,122 --> 00:24:04,210
and reading messages and I go across the center line and I hit another car.

270
00:24:04,210 --> 00:24:06,720
I don't remember what I was texting.

271
00:24:06,720 --> 00:24:11,335
I don't remember what the message said. That's how important it was.

272
00:24:11,335 --> 00:24:14,502
I saw him cross over the center line

273
00:24:14,502 --> 00:24:20,289
and at that moment things going into slow motion and you can just see...

274
00:24:20,289 --> 00:24:23,291
I thought, man, this is going to be bad.

275
00:24:23,291 --> 00:24:26,487
I remember the sound of the cars hitting:

276
00:24:26,487 --> 00:24:30,125
glass breaking, brakes, and tires squealing.

277
00:24:30,125 --> 00:24:36,037
He just side swiped it and sent it into a skid and I had the definite recollection

278
00:24:36,037 --> 00:24:41,126
that I knew right then that I was going to collide with that car.

279
00:24:41,126 --> 00:24:46,039
I just thought, "Oh, this is going to be bad." I knew right then and there.

280
00:24:46,039 --> 00:24:49,623
The question on my mind was, "How bad is this going to be?"

281
00:24:49,623 --> 00:25:03,832
My truck...hit the passengers side of the car and basically scooped the car up

282
00:25:03,832 --> 00:25:06,267
and carried it off into the ditch with us.

283
00:25:06,267 --> 00:25:11,248
I had braked and was trying to stop and avoid it and obviously I couldn't.

284
00:25:11,248 --> 00:25:15,798
My pickup went halfway through that car.

285
00:25:15,798 --> 00:25:20,509
I got out of my car and I ran back towards the accident

286
00:25:20,509 --> 00:25:24,674
and...there was a man on the phone,

287
00:25:24,674 --> 00:25:41,501
I heard him say there were two men in the car that... weren't breathing.

288
00:25:41,501 --> 00:25:45,775
The two people that were killed were inside the blue car.

289
00:25:45,775 --> 00:25:51,936
This other one shows what the car looked like after the accident.

290
00:25:51,936 --> 00:26:29,356
...I look at that picture...

291
00:26:29,356 --> 00:26:37,089


292
00:26:37,089 --> 00:26:46,799
all I can think about is those families, those two men.

293
00:26:46,799 --> 00:26:49,657
While I was driving I decided that texting

294
00:26:49,657 --> 00:26:58,517
and driving was more important to me than those two men and their families.

295
00:26:58,517 --> 00:27:03,113


296
00:27:03,113 --> 00:27:12,787
...and how selfish that was of me to make that decision to text and drive.

297
00:27:12,787 --> 00:27:17,095


298
00:27:17,095 --> 00:27:29,202
Knowing everyday...that you killed two people, is

299
00:27:29,202 --> 00:27:34,515
one of the hardest things you can live with.

300
00:27:34,515 --> 00:27:42,309
I have night terrors all the time about my Dad's car accident that come in waves

301
00:27:42,309 --> 00:27:48,962
...It could be just me standing on the side of the highway where it happened.

302
00:27:48,962 --> 00:27:54,512
Just watching the accident happen and not being able to move, I can't go try

303
00:27:54,512 --> 00:27:59,758
and stop the accident from happening. I can't go see if my fathers okay.

304
00:27:59,758 --> 00:28:03,690
I can't save my father, I'm just standing on the side of the road,

305
00:28:03,690 --> 00:28:06,422
I can't do anything...

306
00:28:06,422 --> 00:28:16,067
To I've been...Reggie, the one texting while driving that hits the car.

307
00:28:16,067 --> 00:28:21,676
Just being the one that causes the accident...

308
00:28:21,676 --> 00:28:28,647
To I've been the driver of the truck that t-boned my Dad.

309
00:28:28,647 --> 00:28:37,962
Just sitting in the seat, killing my own father.

310
00:28:37,962 --> 00:28:41,377
I ended up with some herniated discs in my back

311
00:28:41,377 --> 00:28:44,373
and my knees took a pretty big beating in the dash.

312
00:28:44,373 --> 00:28:50,048
How much of the damage from them in the accident?

313
00:28:50,048 --> 00:28:53,178
I don't know. Horseshoeing is a very physical occupation.

314
00:28:53,178 --> 00:28:55,632
It's hard on your back anyway

315
00:28:55,632 --> 00:29:02,053
and to suddenly end up with some herniated discs...your life horseshoeing is over.

316
00:29:02,053 --> 00:29:14,184


317
00:29:14,184 --> 00:29:22,230
Its been almost 7 years in September and it is still very difficult for me.

318
00:29:22,230 --> 00:29:28,920
That accident was preventable. There's no other way to look at it.

319
00:29:28,920 --> 00:29:33,109
I put my phone away and I save those two men's lives.

320
00:29:33,109 --> 00:29:36,682
It's that simple. It's that simple, for me,

321
00:29:36,682 --> 00:29:44,272
now looking back and when I speak to others I share the same message.

322
00:29:44,272 --> 00:29:49,305
I say, "Its now that easy for you going forward to save someone's life.

323
00:29:49,305 --> 00:29:51,922
You put the phone away while you drive

324
00:29:51,922 --> 00:29:55,259
and you're safer behind the wheel and everyone else is

325
00:29:55,259 --> 00:29:57,847
safer on the road around you."

326
00:29:57,847 --> 00:30:01,375
I want people to look at me and look at what I did

327
00:30:01,375 --> 00:30:08,257
and what I caused and say, " I don't want to be that guy."

328
00:30:08,257 --> 00:30:16,678


329
00:30:16,678 --> 00:30:23,548
The first time I saw Reggie in court, my feelings were just pure hatred.

330
00:30:23,548 --> 00:30:29,156
I was appalled at the fact that this kid my age had killed my Dad...

331
00:30:29,156 --> 00:30:31,396
taken him away from me.

332
00:30:31,396 --> 00:30:35,288
On my sentencing date, the families had a chance to get up

333
00:30:35,288 --> 00:30:37,940
and address me and speak to me.

334
00:30:37,940 --> 00:30:41,875
All I can do is just look at him and hate him

335
00:30:41,875 --> 00:30:45,987
and wish how much he would die and that it was him

336
00:30:45,987 --> 00:30:49,153
that was dead instead of my Dad.

337
00:30:49,153 --> 00:30:58,335
Megan got up and she talked about her wedding and she had just gotten married...

338
00:30:58,335 --> 00:31:07,984
and she talks about her father wasn't there to walk her down the aisle...

339
00:31:07,984 --> 00:31:16,403
and she looked at me and she said because you took that from me...

340
00:31:16,403 --> 00:31:24,067
she was absolutely right.

341
00:31:24,067 --> 00:31:29,349
I would like to think that my Dad is somewhere in the universe.

342
00:31:29,349 --> 00:31:33,900
I go outside at night and sit on my balcony when I'm really upset

343
00:31:33,900 --> 00:31:40,833
and I stare at the sky and whenever I'm super upset, I always see a shooting star.

344
00:31:40,833 --> 00:31:48,825
I like to think that's my Dad's way of communicating with me.

345
00:31:48,825 --> 00:31:55,563
I felt that my Dad would not have wanted me to be mad at him for the rest of my life

346
00:31:55,563 --> 00:31:59,375
and I knew my Dad had forgiven him.

347
00:31:59,375 --> 00:32:04,126
I knew that and that he would want me to try and move on

348
00:32:04,126 --> 00:32:09,204
and forgive him and even get to know him.

349
00:32:09,204 --> 00:32:19,792
Forgiveness is...something that I see from Megan.

350
00:32:19,792 --> 00:32:26,914
I see that forgiveness, I feel it. I'm grateful for it.

351
00:32:26,914 --> 00:32:35,174
I reached out to Reggie to tell him that my Dad forgives you, I forgive you.

352
00:32:35,174 --> 00:32:51,045
I want to help you through, you trying to make a difference in this whole thing.

353
00:32:51,045 --> 00:32:53,626
I was once told that to be a good member of society,

354
00:32:53,626 --> 00:32:56,960
you have to give back more than you can take.

355
00:32:56,960 --> 00:33:03,916
I can never give back those two men's lives ever

356
00:33:03,916 --> 00:33:15,555


357
00:33:15,555 --> 00:33:22,019
I would just like to say for anybody out there who has a cell phone,

358
00:33:22,019 --> 00:33:26,938
focus while you're driving, pay attention while you're driving,

359
00:33:26,938 --> 00:33:29,625
don't take your eyes off the road while you're driving.

360
00:33:29,625 --> 00:33:34,950
Things can happen so quick that will change your life forever.

361
00:33:34,950 --> 00:33:45,180
I will say it over and over and over again, don't text and drive...It can wait.

362
00:33:45,180 --> 00:33:50,755
I would tell America to please don't text and drive,

363
00:33:50,755 --> 00:33:55,009
how many other people are going to have to be killed?

364
00:33:55,009 --> 00:34:01,123
How many other people are going to be like my sister Debbie?

365
00:34:01,123 --> 00:34:05,557
It's nuts, It's crazy,

366
00:34:05,557 --> 00:34:09,393
I don't know why people don't' want to talk to each other anyway.

367
00:34:09,393 --> 00:34:36,317
(music)

368
00:34:36,317 --> 00:34:55,469


369
00:34:55,469 --> 00:35:05,469