[Script Info]
Title: 
[Events]
Format: Layer, Start, End, Style, Name, MarginL, MarginR, MarginV, Effect, Text
Dialogue: 0,0:00:09.58,0:00:10.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So, what is empathy,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:11.15,0:00:13.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and why is it very different than sympathy?
Dialogue: 0,0:00:14.71,0:00:15.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Empathy
Dialogue: 0,0:00:15.65,0:00:17.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,fuels connection.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:17.14,0:00:19.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Sympathy drives disconnection.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:20.27,0:00:25.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Empathy is very interesting. Teresa Wiseman is a nursing scholar who studied
Dialogue: 0,0:00:26.07,0:00:27.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,professions,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:27.17,0:00:29.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,very diverse professions where empathy is relevant and
Dialogue: 0,0:00:29.61,0:00:32.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,came up with four qualities of empathy. Perspective,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:32.32,0:00:32.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,taking
Dialogue: 0,0:00:33.62,0:00:35.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the ability to take the perspective of another
Dialogue: 0,0:00:35.32,0:00:38.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,person or recognize their perspective as their truth.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:38.36,0:00:42.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Staying out of judgment, not easy when you enjoy it as much as most of us do.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:44.19,0:00:47.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Recognizing emotion in other people and then communicating that.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:47.92,0:00:48.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Empathy
Dialogue: 0,0:00:49.00,0:00:50.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is feeling with people.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:51.85,0:00:56.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And to me, I always think of empathy as this kind of sacred space
Dialogue: 0,0:00:56.24,0:01:01.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when someone's kind of in a deep hole and they shout out from the bottom and they say
Dialogue: 0,0:01:01.27,0:01:04.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"I'm stuck, it's dark, I'm overwhelmed."
Dialogue: 0,0:01:04.04,0:01:08.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then, we look and we say, "Hey—you climb down—
Dialogue: 0,0:01:08.50,0:01:10.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I know what it's like down here,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:10.46,0:01:11.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and you're not alone."
Dialogue: 0,0:01:12.16,0:01:13.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Sympathy is,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:14.32,0:01:14.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Oh,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:15.91,0:01:17.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's bad. Uh-huh."
Dialogue: 0,0:01:18.18,0:01:20.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Uh... No."
Dialogue: 0,0:01:20.69,0:01:22.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"You want a sandwich?"
Dialogue: 0,0:01:22.47,0:01:23.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Umm...
Dialogue: 0,0:01:24.36,0:01:26.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Empathy is a choice, and it's a vulnerable
Dialogue: 0,0:01:26.68,0:01:29.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,choice because in order to connect with you,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:29.15,0:01:33.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I have to connect with something in myself that knows that feeling.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:34.20,0:01:39.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Rarely if ever does an empathic response begin with at least
Dialogue: 0,0:01:41.12,0:01:42.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I had a, yeah...
Dialogue: 0,0:01:42.93,0:01:45.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And we do it all the time because you know what,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:45.39,0:01:48.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,someone just shared something with us that's incredibly painful,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:49.03,0:01:52.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and we're trying to silver lining it. I don't think that's a verb,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:52.74,0:01:53.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but I'm using it as one.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:54.51,0:01:56.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We're trying to put the silver lining around it. So,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:57.02,0:01:58.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I had a miscarriage.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:59.44,0:02:02.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,At least, you know, you can get pregnant. I think my marriage is falling apart.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:03.28,0:02:05.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,At least you have a marriage.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:09.06,0:02:13.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,John's getting kicked out of school. At least Sarah is an A student.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:13.32,0:02:19.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But one of the things we do sometimes in the face of very difficult conversations
Dialogue: 0,0:02:20.20,0:02:22.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is we try to make things better.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:22.36,0:02:25.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If I share something with you that's very difficult, I'd rather you say,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:27.21,0:02:29.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"I don't even know what to say right now. I'm just so glad you told me."
Dialogue: 0,0:02:31.35,0:02:35.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Because the truth is rarely can a response make something better.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:36.02,0:02:38.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What makes something better is connection.