[Script Info]
Title: 
[Events]
Format: Layer, Start, End, Style, Name, MarginL, MarginR, MarginV, Effect, Text
Dialogue: 0,0:00:00.20,0:00:00.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Ten…
Dialogue: 0,0:00:01.08,0:00:01.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Nine...
Dialogue: 0,0:00:01.92,0:00:02.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Eight...
Dialogue: 0,0:00:02.80,0:00:03.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Seven...
Dialogue: 0,0:00:03.62,0:00:04.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Six...
Dialogue: 0,0:00:04.38,0:00:05.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Five...
Dialogue: 0,0:00:05.38,0:00:05.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Four...
Dialogue: 0,0:00:06.42,0:00:06.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Three..
Dialogue: 0,0:00:07.26,0:00:07.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Two...
Dialogue: 0,0:00:08.08,0:00:08.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,One...
Dialogue: 0,0:00:09.36,0:00:11.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,All: Happy New Year!
Dialogue: 0,0:00:12.78,0:00:15.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Meaty One: You’re all murderers!
Dialogue: 0,0:00:18.22,0:00:21.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Nerdy One: Well that was... unexpected.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:21.56,0:00:23.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Activist One: You ruined my protest!
Dialogue: 0,0:00:47.34,0:00:52.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Girlie One: Thanks for hosting the\Nparty. I don’t think I’ve ever seen your place before
Dialogue: 0,0:00:52.21,0:00:56.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Jockish One: Yeah, I don’t entertain\Nmuch, and don’t usually never go all the way out for
Dialogue: 0,0:00:56.89,0:01:01.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,holiday decorations, but I decided to challenge\Nmyself this year...
Dialogue: 0,0:01:06.40,0:01:12.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Girlie One: Hey you guys. So, I was thinking…what\Nif we did like a group New Years resolution?
Dialogue: 0,0:01:12.98,0:01:14.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Wouldn't that be fun?
Dialogue: 0,0:01:14.38,0:01:17.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Nerdish One: Well, it depends on what\Nyou are proposing that we do.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:17.34,0:01:19.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Girlie One: Well, I was thinking, maybe together we could go on
Dialogue: 0,0:01:19.96,0:01:23.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Activist One: Well, I have an idea that\Nwould make a huge impact on the whole world.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:23.02,0:01:29.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Jockish One: Here it comes…the newest\N“cause of the week,” am I right?
Dialogue: 0,0:01:29.56,0:01:30.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Anyone?
Dialogue: 0,0:01:34.08,0:01:41.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Activist One: C’mon guys, this is serious.\NLike life-changing, life-saving serious.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:41.22,0:01:45.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What if…we all…go vegan!?
Dialogue: 0,0:01:45.83,0:01:49.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Jockish One: Whoa, whoa, whoa, what now?
Dialogue: 0,0:01:49.47,0:02:01.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Activist One: Just hear me out, OK?…............
Dialogue: 0,0:02:01.49,0:02:03.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,....can prevent\Nobesity and erectile dysfunction
Dialogue: 0,0:02:04.58,0:02:06.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Jockish One: Huh? Ahh!
Dialogue: 0,0:02:10.54,0:02:15.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,...........of deforestation and water usage. I mean, there's all kinds of statistics
Dialogue: 0,0:02:15.74,0:02:20.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and graphs and facts and charts and data points and footnotes!
Dialogue: 0,0:02:26.00,0:02:30.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,...........................and think of the baby animals! Look, a teacup pig in rain boots!
Dialogue: 0,0:02:31.58,0:02:32.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Girly One: Awwwwweee!
Dialogue: 0,0:02:34.82,0:02:36.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Meaty One: ALRIGHT ALREADY, WE’LL DO\NIT!!!
Dialogue: 0,0:02:39.60,0:02:42.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,All [except ribs-eater]:\NThree…Two…One… Happy New Year!
Dialogue: 0,0:02:44.44,0:02:46.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Meaty One: You’re all murderers!
Dialogue: 0,0:02:50.22,0:02:55.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Jockish One: I knew this would happen! I’m definitely\Nweaker. And...
Dialogue: 0,0:02:57.52,0:02:59.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I’ve lost muscle mass!
Dialogue: 0,0:02:59.52,0:03:00.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm out!
Dialogue: 0,0:03:03.18,0:03:09.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Come at me, bro! Come at me. Come at me That’s what I thought! That's what I thought!
Dialogue: 0,0:03:11.74,0:03:15.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Girlie One: Well I’m excited about getting\Nback into shape. With fresh, whole foods!
Dialogue: 0,0:03:17.82,0:03:18.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,… I’m fat.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:19.38,0:03:24.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Activist One: Ugh, you guys are so selfish!\NThat’s why you have to be in it for something
Dialogue: 0,0:03:24.65,0:03:29.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,more than yourself! When you think about the\Nanimals and the environment…
Dialogue: 0,0:03:29.44,0:03:32.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Jockish One: Does no one else see that?
Dialogue: 0,0:03:32.05,0:03:37.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Activist One: …going vegan is easy!\NAnd because I also care about my health, I’m
Dialogue: 0,0:03:37.38,0:03:44.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,going fully raw, fully organic vegan with\Na one-month transition period to an exclusive
Dialogue: 0,0:03:44.54,0:03:49.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,diet of wheatgrass juice and coffee enemas!...
Dialogue: 0,0:03:49.46,0:03:53.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Do you even know what kind of vitamins are in raw Brussels sprouts?
Dialogue: 0,0:04:02.14,0:04:04.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Ugh, no, no, nope, I can't do it, I can't.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:06.00,0:04:08.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I can't eat this way, that is just eh, that is too restrictive.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:09.88,0:04:15.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I mean, come on. Who can really afford daily coffee enemas, right?
Dialogue: 0,0:04:15.42,0:04:20.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I mean, Veganism is just another form....
Dialogue: 0,0:04:22.28,0:04:23.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,of oppression!
Dialogue: 0,0:04:23.46,0:04:26.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Nerdish One:You poor little, week, ignorant &#@$%.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:26.50,0:04:27.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Activist One: Not cool.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:27.88,0:04:31.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Nerdish One:…This is why I always say\Nthat coming to a decision based on facts and
Dialogue: 0,0:04:32.33,0:04:37.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,logic is the only way to stay grounded and\Nfollow through with your convictions.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:37.07,0:04:43.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That’s why I’ve outlasted all of you.\NYou see, I didn’t go vegan for health because “vegan”
Dialogue: 0,0:04:43.27,0:04:48.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,only described what you’re not eating, so\Nyou can still be incredibly unhealthy.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:48.45,0:04:51.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Jockish One: Oh god! My body is already\Nout of b12!
Dialogue: 0,0:04:51.57,0:04:52.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Nerdish One: Plus…
Dialogue: 0,0:04:52.57,0:04:54.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Jockish One: I look pale, don’t I look\Npale?
Dialogue: 0,0:04:55.02,0:04:57.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Nerdish One: there’s the tendency with\Nany change
Dialogue: 0,0:04:57.57,0:04:58.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Jockish One: Definitely iron-deficient.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:58.85,0:05:01.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Nerdish One: to start self-diagnosing…
Dialogue: 0,0:05:02.24,0:05:06.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Jockish One: I think it’s my blood type.\NI’m so tired.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:06.24,0:05:10.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Nerdish One: ….and I didn’t tie my\Ndecision to pure emotion for the animals or
Dialogue: 0,0:05:10.54,0:05:14.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,romanticism for the environment, because feelings\Nare in constant fluctuation…
Dialogue: 0,0:05:14.97,0:05:19.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Girlie One: O. M. G.! Those little pigs\Nget FAT!!!
Dialogue: 0,0:05:21.06,0:05:21.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's gross.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:22.26,0:05:26.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Nerdish One: Nor did I rely on selective\Nmorality or subjective ethics because that’s
Dialogue: 0,0:05:26.91,0:05:27.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,a slippery slope.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:27.91,0:05:32.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Activist One: I found a local farmers\Nmarket you see, that’s what we need to do,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:32.80,0:05:37.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you guys! Support small farms, get back to the land and
Dialogue: 0,0:05:37.75,0:05:45.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the way we used to treat animals! Back when we knew every one of them by name, and they trusted
Dialogue: 0,0:05:45.91,0:05:48.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,us right up till their slaughter.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:50.36,0:05:50.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Jockish One: Seriously?
Dialogue: 0,0:05:51.10,0:05:55.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Nerdish One: So…I’ve taken an objective\Nlook at the available data, watched a few speeches
Dialogue: 0,0:05:55.64,0:05:56.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Jockish One: I can’t live like this!
Dialogue: 0,0:05:56.98,0:06:01.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Nerdish One:…and find the environmental,\Nhealth and ethical arguments compelling and
Dialogue: 0,0:06:01.50,0:06:06.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and completely in line not only with the values\Nespoused by the vast majority of our species,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:07.50,0:06:14.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,including the touchy area of justice,\Nand the potentially overly emotional instinct to protect
Dialogue: 0,0:06:14.34,0:06:21.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the innocent, but also logically sound,\Neven after correcting for manipulated, partial
Dialogue: 0,0:06:21.25,0:06:25.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or outdated data, and blatant falsehoods.\NVeganism remains....
Dialogue: 0,0:06:32.20,0:06:34.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the sensible, rational choice.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:36.84,0:06:41.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,…boo, nerd alert, lame, not funny!..
Dialogue: 0,0:06:41.92,0:06:43.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Jockish One: Go home!
Dialogue: 0,0:06:44.54,0:06:47.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Activist One: You suck!
Dialogue: 0,0:06:59.04,0:07:02.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Activist One: Hey guys, how do you know\Nif someone at the party is vegan?
Dialogue: 0,0:07:02.84,0:07:04.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Don't worry, they’ll tell you!
Dialogue: 0,0:07:06.08,0:07:07.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Nerdish One: This was your idea
Dialogue: 0,0:07:07.30,0:07:09.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Activist One: Stop co-opting my activism!
Dialogue: 0,0:07:10.02,0:07:10.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Nerdish One: What?
Dialogue: 0,0:07:10.74,0:07:11.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Activist One: What?
Dialogue: 0,0:07:11.28,0:07:12.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Nerdish One: What?
Dialogue: 0,0:07:12.34,0:07:12.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Activist One: What?
Dialogue: 0,0:07:12.84,0:07:13.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Nerdish One: What?
Dialogue: 0,0:07:13.34,0:07:14.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Activist One: What?
Dialogue: 0,0:07:15.38,0:07:16.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Nerdish One: What?
Dialogue: 0,0:07:16.30,0:07:16.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Activist One: What?
Dialogue: 0,0:07:16.80,0:07:18.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Nerdish One: Wait!
Dialogue: 0,0:07:18.18,0:07:19.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Nerdish One: Wh—Wait, we did save him
Dialogue: 0,0:07:19.20,0:07:20.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Activist One: Did we?
Dialogue: 0,0:07:20.34,0:07:20.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Nerdish One: What?
Dialogue: 0,0:07:21.12,0:07:22.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Activist One: What?
Dialogue: 0,0:07:22.14,0:07:22.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Nerdish One: What?
Dialogue: 0,0:07:22.84,0:07:23.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Activist One: What?
Dialogue: 0,0:07:25.36,0:07:27.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Nerdish One: Wh—Forget it, I’m out. I'm out
Dialogue: 0,0:07:28.18,0:07:28.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm out.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:28.86,0:07:30.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Activist One: Yeah, that's probably best.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:31.37,0:07:31.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Activist One: That’s probably best.