Gentleman open your texts
to page 21 of the introduction
Mr. Perry, would you read the opening
paragraph of the preface
entitled understanding poetry
Understanding Poetry by
Dr. J. Evans Pritchard, PhD
Before we understand poetry
we must first be fluent with
its meter, rhyme and figures of speech,
then ask two questions,
One, how artfully has the objective
of the poem been rendered
and two, how important is that objective.
Question one rates the poem's perfection
question two rates its importance.
And once these questions have been answered,
determining the poem's greatness
becomes a relatively simple matter.
If the poem's score for perfection
is plotted on the horizontal of the graph
and its importance
is plotted on the vertical,
then calculating the total area of the
poem yields the measure of its greatness
A sonnet by Byron might score high on the
vertical, but only average on the horizontal
A Shakesperian sonnet, on the other hand,
would score high both
horizontally and vertically
yielding a massive total area, thereby
revealing the poem to be truly great.
As you can see through the
poetry in this book,
practice this rating method. As your ability
to evaluate poems in this manner grows,
so will your enjoyment
and understanding of poetry.
Excrement.
(dramatic pause)
That's what I think of
Mr. J. Evans Prichard.
We're not laying pipe,
we're talking about poetry.
How can you describe poetry
like American Band Stand?
Well, I like Byron, I give him a 42,
but I can't dance to it. (laughter)
Now I want you to rip out that page.
Go on, rip out the entire page.
You heard me, rip it out.
RIP IT OUT!
Go on, rip it out!
Thank you Mr. Dalton.
Gentleman, I'll tell you what
don't just rip out that page,
tear out the entire introduction.
I want it gone, history
leave nothing of it.
Rip it Out, RIP!
(sounds of paper ripping)
Be gone J. Evans Pritchard, PhD.
Rip, shred, tear, rip it out!
I want to hear nothing but ripping
of Mr. Pritchard.
We'll perforate it, put it on a roll.
It's not the bible,
you're not going to go to hell for this.
(sound of paper ripping and laughter)
Make a clean tear,
I want nothing left of this.
(whispering) We shouldn't be doing this
Rip! Rip!
Rip it Out! Rip!
(sound of ripping paper)
What the hell is going on here!
(paper ripping stops)
I don't hear enough rips!
- Mr. Keating
- Mr. McAllister
(dramatic pause)
I'm sorry I, I didn't know you were here.
- I am.
- Well, so you are. Excuse me.
Keep ripping gentleman!
This is a battle, a war,
and the casualties could...