0:00:11.640,0:00:16.650
To enter the human experience is to [br]enter a great forgetting.

0:00:18.730,0:00:24.970
The veil of the conditioned mind obscures[br]the truth of who we really are,

0:00:28.050,0:00:34.210
casting us into a world of [br]separation, limitation and doubt.

0:00:36.370,0:00:42.050
So who are you really? [br]Are you just a mind living in a body,

0:00:42.760,0:00:48.210
navigating through life, trying to find [br]happiness and avoiding suffering?

0:00:48.210,0:00:54.860
Or maybe something else entirely, [br]something much deeper, something eternal.

0:00:54.860,0:01:00.180
Something that can't be explained[br]in words. Something that when realized

0:01:00.180,0:01:06.720
brings true peace and true fulfillment. [br]Here we're going to look beyond the veil

0:01:06.720,0:01:12.220
of the mind, beyond thoughts and [br]sensations, to find out the truth

0:01:12.220,0:01:15.632
of who we really are.

0:01:33.392,0:01:37.392
So what is the mind?

0:01:37.792,0:01:44.430
Throughout history, this question has been [br]asked countless times. From humanity's

0:01:44.430,0:01:49.790
earliest spiritual and scientific [br]inquiries the human mind has been

0:01:49.790,0:01:55.380
conceptualized and understood in [br]various ways across different cultures.

0:01:55.380,0:02:01.580
Humans have used philosophy, psychological[br]and scientific theories as well as

0:02:01.580,0:02:08.280
methods of direct investigation to [br]penetrate the mind's secrets.. to find out

0:02:08.280,0:02:14.790
who we are beyond the mind and body. [br]Ordinarily we think of mind as being

0:02:14.790,0:02:19.220
maybe something inside the head like [br]the brain and it's do with thinking

0:02:19.220,0:02:27.505
and cognition but the mind is much deeper[br]than this. The mind is actually duality.

0:02:28.155,0:02:33.260
It's also known as Maya or Illusion. [br]It's also known as ego.

0:02:33.900,0:02:41.050
In Latin the word ego means simply "I". [br]When the sense of "I" is limited to some

0:02:41.050,0:02:47.915
thing it is maya, illusion, but when it's[br]unlimited... when it wakes up as

0:02:47.915,0:02:53.920
consciousness itself, within which all [br]phenomena arises and passes away,

0:02:53.920,0:02:59.470
then there's no longer an identification[br]with a separate "I".

0:02:59.960,0:03:06.920
The true meaning of the word "I" is [br]infinite awareness, infinite consciousness

0:03:06.920,0:03:13.410
That's the only "I" or the only Self [br]there is. However for most of us

0:03:13.410,0:03:19.670
our sense of our self has become so[br]entangled in the content of experience...

0:03:19.670,0:03:25.560
thoughts, images, feelings, and so on, [br]that we don't perceive ourself as we

0:03:25.560,0:03:32.760
essentially and originally are. But we [br]know ourselves in a modified way... mixed

0:03:32.760,0:03:39.970
with the content of experience. And this[br]mixture of the true and only "I" of infinite

0:03:39.970,0:03:44.940
awareness or infinite Consciousness with [br]the content of experience makes for this

0:03:44.940,0:03:51.230
illusory self which is what is usually[br]referred to as the the ego or the

0:03:51.230,0:03:57.710
separate self. The ego is an idea very[br]persistent very strong, very solid, that

0:03:57.710,0:04:04.860
we are a person... a separate entity [br]inside a body mind. Or sometimes

0:04:04.860,0:04:10.381
we think to be just a body mind. The ego [br]is an aspect of the mind which forms

0:04:10.381,0:04:17.510
at a young age and it's that aspect which[br]gives us a sense of I am an individual me.

0:04:17.510,0:04:25.820
The ego is literally a made up entity[br]and it's not real and it's that which

0:04:25.820,0:04:34.460
we identify as the body. It's the part of[br]the mind that thinks it's separate.

0:04:34.460,0:04:42.790
The ego is the personal sense of me[br]but it's not the true self.

0:04:43.750,0:04:49.630
It's a whole imagined construct of me [br]it's not ultimately who I am. Ultimately

0:04:49.630,0:04:58.279
who I am is that which is deeper and this[br]underlying presence that's always here.

0:04:58.869,0:05:05.600
The dualistic mind is made of two [br]fundamental aspects... the witness and

0:05:05.600,0:05:11.540
what is witnessed. There's the phenomena[br]of the world made up of sensations

0:05:11.540,0:05:17.930
perceptions and egoic preferences, and[br]then there's the sense that there's an "I"

0:05:17.930,0:05:25.110
that is separate, witnessing. Awakening is[br]waking up from this duality... from the

0:05:25.110,0:05:32.260
split between witness and witnessed. [br]Between subject and object, to realize

0:05:32.260,0:05:38.710
primordial awareness that is ever present.

0:05:38.710,0:05:45.600
If you look at young children, young [br]children don't have an ego and they live

0:05:45.600,0:05:50.730
in a state of participation. They live [br]in a state of exhilaration, because

0:05:50.730,0:05:54.590
they are not separate to the world.

0:05:54.930,0:06:01.130
When we're born we're dependent and we[br]don't yet have conceptual thinking.

0:06:01.130,0:06:06.709
As we develop, we develop concepts and [br]what's called self-awareness, which is the

0:06:06.709,0:06:12.040
ability to reflect on what we're doing in[br]order to become independent.

0:06:12.040,0:06:16.880
So that thinking process becomes[br]this internal identity.

0:06:16.880,0:06:23.640
The formation of the ego begins soon after[br]birth. We begin to develop a personal

0:06:23.640,0:06:31.790
identity which we eventually call "I" or[br]"me". The mirror stage in human

0:06:31.790,0:06:38.740
development is the point at which a child[br]recognizes themself in a mirror, usually

0:06:38.740,0:06:46.050
around 6 to 18 months of age. And it is[br]just one part of the formation of the ego

0:06:46.050,0:06:52.710
via the process of identification. It's [br]not that we get our ego from recognizing

0:06:52.710,0:06:59.390
a character in the mirror. It's part of a[br]socialization process or conditioning

0:06:59.390,0:07:07.730
as those around us begin to treat us as a [br]separate person, as a separate "I".

0:07:07.730,0:07:13.870
We learn to identify a sense of "I" through[br]the sensations that arise on the body,

0:07:13.870,0:07:21.740
through perception and conceptualization[br]of things. The mind divides and separates

0:07:21.740,0:07:28.020
one thing from another, and then we develop[br]preferences towards those things.

0:07:28.020,0:07:34.050
Some things we like, some some things we[br]don't like. This "I" becomes our

0:07:34.050,0:07:40.140
individual separate and unique identity[br]as we move through life.

0:07:40.140,0:07:44.250
It is the story of who we believe we are.

0:07:44.250,0:07:48.430
And the consciousness that we are, starts [br]to believe it when we are very young.

0:07:48.430,0:07:54.965
When we are children and it grows with us [br]until we are completely convinced

0:07:54.965,0:08:00.930
to be a person. As people grow and move[br]towards adolescent and into adulthood they

0:08:00.930,0:08:06.760
develop a sense of separation; a sense of[br]being an "I" who lives inside their heads.

0:08:06.760,0:08:15.980
So they become separate egos [br]who live in a state of wanting,

0:08:15.980,0:08:21.130
a state of incompleteness, whose lives [br]are dominated by a desire to

0:08:21.130,0:08:25.990
accumulate things to compensate for [br]their incompleteness.

0:08:25.990,0:08:31.350
It's the mind that causes all the issues[br]all the problems. The mind is a power

0:08:31.350,0:08:35.330
that creates the entire[br]illusion of separation...

0:08:35.330,0:08:41.410
The entire illusion or appearance of[br]being a person living in a world.

0:08:41.410,0:08:48.750
We could experientially verify[br]that every time we experience

0:08:48.750,0:08:56.590
psychological suffering we can always[br]trace it back to the belief to be this

0:08:56.590,0:09:04.020
separate person, this separate entity.[br]There are no exceptions, no exceptions.

0:09:04.020,0:09:11.000
I'm not talking about physical pain, but[br]psychological suffering is absolutely

0:09:11.000,0:09:18.819
unnecessary it is predicated upon the[br]belief to be this separate or

0:09:18.819,0:09:26.960
apparently separate body mind. [br]Because we're like fragments who've been

0:09:26.960,0:09:32.919
broken away from the whole, like jigsaw[br]pieces that have become disconnected and

0:09:32.919,0:09:38.110
spread far apart. So there is a feeling[br]of "something's missing",

0:09:38.110,0:09:42.156
"something's not right". The mind seems[br]like an insurmountable obstacle.

0:09:42.156,0:09:46.800
How can we overcome the mind? [br]The mind seems to have no end.

0:09:47.330,0:09:53.190
Attempting to conquer the mind using the[br]mind creates an endless struggle.

0:09:53.190,0:09:59.120
Akin to trying to lift oneself up by [br]pulling on one's own bootstraps.

0:09:59.360,0:10:05.600
The ego structure can feel devastated,[br]lost and confused, feeling that life

0:10:05.600,0:10:12.030
has no meaning, and as that seeking mind[br]struggles we experience what St John

0:10:12.030,0:10:18.160
of the Cross called The Dark Night of [br]the Soul. This is a necessary part of the

0:10:18.160,0:10:24.883
disillusionment process. It is only by [br]letting go of seeking and the false

0:10:24.883,0:10:32.860
identification with the seeker that [br]we come into direct union with life.

0:10:44.170,0:10:49.680
I was in a good place in my life. I had [br]sort of given up on the spiritual search,

0:10:49.680,0:10:55.440
not because I'd given up as such but [br]because there was nothing else really to

0:10:55.440,0:11:00.961
look for. I wasn't seeking enlightenment. [br]I wasn't seeking a awakening. I was

0:11:00.961,0:11:06.970
seeking peace and I was seeking happiness[br]and I found that surrender to what is was

0:11:06.970,0:11:12.430
the only way and that life was my teacher.[br]After many many many years of searching

0:11:12.430,0:11:22.390
everything fell away. The structure of the[br]me that I knew myself as fell away.

0:11:23.350,0:11:33.710
I was sitting in my living room [br]and over a period of a few weeks a great

0:11:33.710,0:11:43.780
sort of inner desolation seemed to appear[br]in me. So this was unexpected, this vast

0:11:43.780,0:11:52.460
inner landscape of darkness... a kind of[br]abandonment... an existential abandonment

0:11:52.460,0:12:03.900
from life itself. And I noticed how the[br]mind's movement wanted to move away from

0:12:03.900,0:12:11.470
this inner landscape of darkness. [br]And I asked a question to myself:

0:12:11.470,0:12:17.800
"What is the meaning of suffering? [br]What is the nature of suffering?

0:12:17.800,0:12:25.670
How can suffering end?" Or perhaps it[br]doesn't end and in that question what

0:12:25.670,0:12:32.220
arose was this willingness to not move [br]from where I was, to not move away from

0:12:32.220,0:12:39.730
that dark landscape, and to surrender [br]in that even if it meant the end of me.

0:12:39.730,0:12:46.286
And I didn't know what that meant, the end[br]of me, but it came up as a kind of knowing

0:12:46.286,0:12:51.820
that wasn't yet conscious, and in that [br]moment totally unexpectedly the whole

0:12:51.820,0:13:02.030
structure of self died. It's like the whole[br]'me' identity died, and surprisingly

0:13:02.030,0:13:11.570
there was a merging with life itself that[br]ended the separation between me and life.

0:13:11.570,0:13:20.320
And from that point on I knew that I and[br]life are one; there is no separation...

0:13:20.320,0:13:27.320
it's all in the mind's movement. And from[br]that point on the whole structure of this

0:13:27.320,0:13:35.530
'Amoda' that had been built on a victim[br]identity, not just a victim of

0:13:35.530,0:13:40.440
circumstances, but a victim of my feelings[br]a victim of emotions, a victim of

0:13:40.440,0:13:44.790
thoughts, and therefore constantly trying [br]to change those, to change thoughts to

0:13:44.790,0:13:49.517
change feelings, to make them better, to[br]make them more positive, to make them more

0:13:49.517,0:13:58.510
uplifted... that ended. And without the [br]victim it was as if I was born anew.

0:13:58.510,0:14:05.330
So I died and I was reborn in that. [br]It's like all the veils of perception that

0:14:05.330,0:14:11.460
were built on the identity of Amoda as a[br]me with her history, with her thoughts,

0:14:11.460,0:14:17.898
with her beliefs, with her experiences,[br]just came undone. So it was totally naked

0:14:17.898,0:14:23.510
from that moment on and it's [br]never changed since then.

0:14:27.050,0:14:33.610
In Buddhism the first Noble Truth [br]is that there is suffering. There is this

0:14:33.610,0:14:40.210
inherent dissatisfaction within the[br]conditioned mind. Dukkha or the chronic

0:14:40.210,0:14:47.120
dissatisfaction of the mind encompasses [br]not only physical and emotional pain but

0:14:47.120,0:14:53.690
also more subtle forms of dissatisfaction[br]such as the inherent impermanence of all

0:14:53.690,0:15:00.780
things and the inability to find lasting [br]satisfaction in worldly pursuits.

0:15:00.780,0:15:07.180
True happiness or fulfillment cannot be[br]found in external material pursuits.

0:15:07.710,0:15:11.428
Even when things go the way we think they[br]should. Even when we're following

0:15:11.428,0:15:16.365
the script, being a good person, we have [br]successful relationships, successful

0:15:16.365,0:15:21.970
careers, even then there's often this [br]underlying sense that something's just not

0:15:21.970,0:15:29.090
quite right. Something that we're missing,[br]something that we're not perceiving

0:15:29.090,0:15:36.020
accurately, and the closer we look at that[br]often it becomes more vivid, more obvious.

0:15:36.020,0:15:42.690
So what I often say is the first step in [br]the awakening process is acknowledging

0:15:42.690,0:15:50.280
that we suffer. We could summarize it[br]by saying it's a sort of sense that life

0:15:50.280,0:15:56.360
just isn't functioning right, or perhaps [br]I'm not functioning right within life.

0:15:56.360,0:15:59.893
But it's uncomfortable... it's grace that[br]it's uncomfortable because it leads us

0:15:59.893,0:16:07.173
into this investigation that can take us to[br]places that we never could have imagined.

0:16:07.173,0:16:15.520
Why do people suffer? If we talk about [br]physical pain we have to understand that

0:16:15.520,0:16:24.350
the reason why we experience physical pain[br]is because physical pain is a protection

0:16:24.350,0:16:33.770
device that we have genetically inherited.[br]If we never experienced pain we would

0:16:33.770,0:16:43.410
constantly bump into objects and our body[br]would drink sulfuric acid and our body

0:16:43.410,0:16:51.740
wouldn't last for too long. The reason of [br]psychological pain is different. It is:

0:16:51.740,0:17:00.330
"you're making a mistake". [br]So psychological pain is not a problem,

0:17:00.330,0:17:05.930
it is the beginning of the solution. [br]Psychological pain is telling us a lesson

0:17:05.930,0:17:12.540
about another mistake we make which is to[br]believe we are a separate human being.

0:17:12.540,0:17:19.150
That's a mistake... that's a fundamental [br]mistake. It is the original sin;

0:17:19.150,0:17:28.840
the original sin that kicks us out of the[br]Kingdom, out of the garden of Eden.

0:17:30.360,0:17:37.790
The original meaning of the word sin[br]means "to miss the mark".

0:17:37.840,0:17:44.514
Egoic consciousness is a pathological[br]state of mind whereby we constantly

0:17:44.514,0:17:51.200
miss the mark. This is the meaning of[br]"the fall". We are focused on the fruits

0:17:51.200,0:17:56.850
of the tree of knowledge of good[br]and evil, focused on thoughts.

0:17:56.850,0:18:03.050
The dualistic mind is made of the phenomena[br]that forms the perceived world of form;

0:18:03.050,0:18:10.250
made of sensations, perceptions, egoic[br]preferences, and this sense that there is

0:18:10.250,0:18:17.480
an "I" that is separate, witnessing. It is[br]this "I" thought that is at the root of

0:18:17.480,0:18:20.580
identification with the ego.

0:18:20.580,0:18:30.226
Whatever we are experiencing it is I who[br]am experiencing it. If I am sad or anxious

0:18:30.226,0:18:34.770
or lonely it is I who am having that [br]experience. If I'm talking with you

0:18:34.770,0:18:39.800
it is I who am talking. If I'm seeing the[br]world it is I who am seeing the world.

0:18:39.800,0:18:47.620
So all our experience revolves around [br]this "I". "I" is the central character

0:18:47.620,0:18:58.680
in all our experience so that the essential[br]investigation... the prerequisite for

0:18:58.680,0:19:03.841
awakening, is to explore [br]and recognize the nature of the "I"

0:19:03.841,0:19:06.900
or the self that we really are.

0:19:06.900,0:19:13.247
In the heart Sutra one of the most revered[br]teachings of Buddhism it says that to be

0:19:13.247,0:19:19.670
liberated we must realize this entire [br]mechanism of the dualistic mind

0:19:19.670,0:19:28.650
to be empty of self. When the "I" thought[br]drops, then duality itself collapses.

0:19:28.650,0:19:35.120
Form is realized as exactly emptiness, [br]emptiness exactly form.

0:19:35.120,0:19:43.850
In the samadhi state, emptiness dances[br]as fullness, stillness is inherent within

0:19:43.850,0:19:51.570
movement, silence inherent within [br]sound. Life is experienced directly,

0:19:51.570,0:19:58.580
not mediated via the filter of the mind. [br]When we no longer go after the fruits

0:19:58.580,0:20:04.660
of the tree of knowledge of good and evil,[br]when we no longer interface with the world

0:20:04.660,0:20:11.923
in the old way, it is liberation, [br]the end of suffering.

0:20:11.923,0:20:18.550
As long as we believe to be having our own[br]mind or our own ignorance or our own ego,

0:20:18.550,0:20:23.920
it is because we are viewing this from a[br]separate point of view and this is okay

0:20:23.920,0:20:27.840
you know at the beginning that's how you're[br]going to see it. But it's not how things

0:20:27.840,0:20:36.410
are in reality. In reality there is only[br]life. That's it. Only pure life into action

0:20:36.410,0:20:40.700
So suffering is this resistance to life,[br]resistance to our yes,

0:20:40.700,0:20:46.230
resistance to our no, resistance to[br]anything that is appearing,

0:20:46.230,0:20:53.140
because we feel separated. And awakening[br]is the healing of this separation,

0:20:53.140,0:20:56.534
of this idea to be separated.

0:20:56.534,0:21:01.750
We can start to understand egoic [br]resistance in the mind by observing the

0:21:01.750,0:21:09.910
larger principle of how all energy moves[br]in the universe. One way to understand is

0:21:09.910,0:21:15.980
by looking at something called a [br]Lichtenberg figure. A Lichtenberg figure

0:21:15.980,0:21:21.820
is a pattern that occurs when high voltage[br]electrical discharge passes through

0:21:21.820,0:21:28.200
materials. The electrical discharge [br]creates a pattern of branching channels

0:21:28.200,0:21:36.150
that look like trees. Here electricity is[br]going into wood. In this example the

0:21:36.150,0:21:42.980
Lichtenberg figure is created by injecting[br]trillions of electrons into an acrylic

0:21:42.980,0:21:49.984
block using a 5 million volt particle[br]accelerator. All physical matter, in this

0:21:49.984,0:21:56.610
case the acrylic block, is a resistance[br]or slowing down of energy.

0:21:56.610,0:22:02.680
In a thunderstorm the resistance of the[br]air affects the formation of the conductive

0:22:02.680,0:22:08.560
channel and the current flow. When we [br]observe the treelike structures created by

0:22:08.560,0:22:15.960
the energy we're seeing the path that[br]energy took through the medium

0:22:15.960,0:22:21.429
through time. These treelike patterns or[br]branching patterns are found at all levels

0:22:21.429,0:22:31.597
and scales of nature, from the micro to [br]the macro. The very fabric of the universe

0:22:31.597,0:22:38.930
is a play of form, a play of resistance;[br]one giant mind playing a kind of hide

0:22:38.930,0:22:46.440
and seek with itself. Samskaras or[br]unconscious patterns are created when the

0:22:46.440,0:22:54.410
charge of an experience is high. Energies[br]come together and the "I" thought appears.

0:22:54.410,0:23:00.930
Resistance appears. If there's no[br]resistance then energy just passes through

0:23:00.930,0:23:07.020
life flows through. But when there's[br]resistance, when "I" appears,

0:23:07.020,0:23:12.510
then the energy branches off, creating[br]new pathways in the unconscious mind.

0:23:12.510,0:23:20.040
These patterns run autonomously, hiding[br]and growing in the shadows until they're

0:23:20.040,0:23:25.433
revealed again and consciously integrated [br]into the whole.

0:23:26.263,0:23:31.870
The very first memory I have is of being[br]really scared and I didn't know why I was

0:23:31.870,0:23:38.910
scared and feeling like something was going[br]to go wrong in any particular moment,

0:23:38.910,0:23:46.360
and that feeling persisted throughout my[br]whole life and intensified in my 20s.

0:23:46.360,0:23:52.440
And I sank into a deep depression even[br]after having four children.

0:23:52.440,0:23:59.440
And I ended up going through probably 3[br]or 4 years where I was really searching

0:23:59.440,0:24:03.500
for something but didn't know what that[br]was. I never heard about awakening, didn't

0:24:03.500,0:24:11.040
know what that was. And over time it began[br]to become clear that whatever I was looking

0:24:11.040,0:24:18.050
for wasn't to be found in my outer life.[br]I had a good family, good business at the

0:24:18.050,0:24:23.020
time; all the things that anyone could[br]want. And yet still felt really empty

0:24:23.020,0:24:32.960
inside, and eventually as part of healing[br]from my depression I discovered meditation

0:24:32.960,0:24:41.830
and dived into that, found some kind of[br]peace, some deep sense of contentment,

0:24:41.830,0:24:48.000
and for the first time in my entire life [br]that sense of dread or fear had disappeared

0:24:48.000,0:24:55.090
just momentarily for that first time ever.[br]So I began to try to find out everything I

0:24:55.090,0:24:59.757
could about what had happened, why that[br]change. And why it had come back again,

0:24:59.757,0:25:05.260
that feeling of fear. I began to research[br]different spiritual pathways and came

0:25:05.260,0:25:10.480
across this term awakening, enlightenment,[br]and began to try to understand

0:25:10.480,0:25:19.920
what that is. Eventually 15-20 years later[br]came to recognize that it is

0:25:19.920,0:25:24.850
when we're not believing our thoughts[br]anymore. Thoughts might still be going on,

0:25:24.850,0:25:29.530
but the fear was coming from believing[br]my thoughts, believing that I was just

0:25:29.530,0:25:36.860
a person or someone who was going about[br]my life, and came to see I was a lot more

0:25:36.860,0:25:46.510
than that. I am infinite and that over a[br]period of 5 years that began to stabilize

0:25:46.510,0:25:50.779
for lack of a better word. I had to look[br]at everything that was coming up

0:25:50.779,0:25:58.720
in the way of that, the sense of not[br]being a good enough parent, the sense of

0:25:58.720,0:26:05.108
this feeling of inadequacy in my core. [br]I had to really look at that and

0:26:05.108,0:26:12.546
investigate that and contemplate that. [br]And eventually the peace became stable

0:26:12.546,0:26:18.950
effortless, and even joy and love, [br]sometimes even bliss. A deep sense of

0:26:18.950,0:26:24.650
everything being okay, feeling at home, [br]feeling safe, feeling that I can love

0:26:24.650,0:26:30.120
myself, I like myself which is something[br]that was not possible before for me.

0:26:32.270,0:26:37.430
Many people get a glimpse of awakening[br]but then seem to lose it.

0:26:37.430,0:26:42.990
There's this game of I've got it and then[br]I've lost it, or I'm awake and now

0:26:42.990,0:26:49.500
the mind has come back. This happens when[br]awakening is not fully recognized

0:26:49.500,0:26:58.520
for what it is. Often there's a pleasant[br]state when samadhi occurs; energy, bliss

0:26:58.520,0:27:05.640
or a change in the mind consciousness or [br]perception and a sense of ease or freedom.

0:27:05.640,0:27:10.399
And one will naturally mistake the[br]phenomenal state for the truth

0:27:10.399,0:27:17.684
of who you are. Often after a glimpse of[br]awakening one will start seeking states

0:27:17.684,0:27:24.080
or experiences rather than recognizing[br]the awareness that is already present,

0:27:24.080,0:27:30.320
and realizing it to be the source of true[br]fulfillment. The truth of who you are

0:27:30.320,0:27:38.250
is not a temporary state or experience.[br]The phenomena comes and goes but the one

0:27:38.250,0:27:46.890
who remains, primordial awareness, always [br]IS. If you continue seeking states

0:27:46.890,0:27:52.780
or experiences, eventually the seeker will[br]get stronger and stronger and you will get

0:27:52.780,0:27:58.170
farther and farther from the truth.[br]The Seeker always misses the mark

0:27:58.170,0:28:04.210
by chasing what is impermanent, just[br]like an addict chasing temporary highs,

0:28:04.210,0:28:08.110
and just like the addict the false seeker[br]will always come

0:28:08.110,0:28:11.540
to a crisis point or failure point.

0:28:11.540,0:28:17.498
Life is a festival of addictive patterns of[br]behavior and when I say that I don't mean

0:28:17.498,0:28:23.920
only addiction to drugs like alcohol and[br]nicotine. Everything that is preponderant

0:28:23.920,0:28:27.970
in society tends to be addictive [br]patterns of behavior; addiction to

0:28:27.970,0:28:34.320
reality television, addiction to celebrity[br]life addiction to buying the next pair of

0:28:34.320,0:28:40.379
shoes, and why is that? The reason for[br]that is that we are desperate to find a

0:28:40.379,0:28:48.270
way to escape the profoundly meaningless[br]and unnatural way of life that we have.

0:28:48.270,0:28:52.401
But we don't know how to escape that so [br]we try to compensate for it by engaging

0:28:52.401,0:29:02.080
in addiction. Now understanding reality [br]has this peculiar characteristic of making

0:29:02.080,0:29:06.610
life more natural, making life better [br]aligned with the rhythm and flow

0:29:06.610,0:29:10.440
and the directions of nature. If that [br]happens there is no need

0:29:10.440,0:29:15.130
for the addiction anymore, and we will[br]live more fulfilling, healthier overall

0:29:15.130,0:29:22.160
better lives without skewed perspectives [br]like the notion that your life is about you

0:29:22.160,0:29:26.560
and my life is about me, which is one of[br]the most unnatural things imaginable.

0:29:26.560,0:29:32.169
It's like the blossom on my apple tree[br]thinking my life's about me and I need to

0:29:32.169,0:29:36.230
survive forever. If the blossom had [br]its way there would be no more apples

0:29:36.230,0:29:38.410
and no more apple trees.

0:29:38.410,0:29:43.917
Once we understand the truth there[br]is naturally a flip from an ego centered

0:29:43.917,0:29:49.740
life or a life that is constantly feeding [br]the patterns of craving and aversion,

0:29:49.740,0:29:54.920
to a life that is more natural, [br]more in the flow.

0:29:54.920,0:29:59.990
And then it can happen at a certain point[br]that this idea goes into crisis and maybe

0:29:59.990,0:30:07.380
we start to seek spiritually or maybe [br]before then some psychological inquiry.

0:30:07.380,0:30:11.770
Then comes a moment in which we are ready[br]to see beyond this illusion of being

0:30:11.770,0:30:18.615
separated and let's say a conscious[br]spiritual seeking starts. This spiritual

0:30:18.615,0:30:23.720
seeking might starts before we are[br]aware that we are spiritually seeking.

0:30:23.720,0:30:33.557
When it's conscious we can see this[br]unfolding of life no more as something

0:30:33.557,0:30:38.050
to fight against, but as an[br]invitation to wake up,

0:30:38.050,0:30:40.570
so we start to be more open to life.

0:30:40.570,0:30:47.250
Also suffering is the best [br]natural tool to foment insight.

0:30:47.250,0:30:52.123
We don't ask the deep questions unless[br]we are suffering. If you're not suffering

0:30:52.123,0:30:58.840
we just sort of ride the wave of life in a[br]very Epicurean lighthearted superficial

0:30:58.840,0:31:03.000
manner, and we never stop to think about[br]what is happening. Who am I?

0:31:03.000,0:31:06.030
what is this about? No. [br]What is the purpose of it all?

0:31:06.030,0:31:10.000
What's the meaning of it? We don't ask[br]those questions unless we suffer.

0:31:10.000,0:31:13.860
So suffering is a tremendous tool. [br]It's very conducive to insight.

0:31:13.860,0:31:20.930
Now we make it worse than it needs to be.[br]We invent unnecessary superfluous suffering.

0:31:20.930,0:31:25.410
I like to call it meta-suffering, and meta[br]suffering comes from that little voice

0:31:25.410,0:31:31.150
in your head that says you are suffering[br]and you shouldn't be. That doubles the

0:31:31.150,0:31:35.700
suffering right there. Because now not[br]only do we still have the suffering that's

0:31:35.700,0:31:40.385
natural and part of your life and you can't[br]avoid, now you have the meta-suffering for

0:31:40.385,0:31:46.510
being at war with nature, for being at war[br]with the original suffering. The game is

0:31:46.510,0:31:52.625
not to get rid of a natural process[br]conducive to insight, a key tool

0:31:52.625,0:31:58.380
of nature, the game is to not exacerbate[br]it unnecessarily by waging war against it

0:32:00.080,0:32:07.292
When we drop resistance to suffering then [br]it is no longer suffering. It transmutes

0:32:07.292,0:32:13.900
into something that is for your benefit.[br]Often in spiritual circles we hear the

0:32:13.900,0:32:21.575
phrase "love what is." It is possible to[br]love whatever pain is arising by learning

0:32:21.575,0:32:27.322
to surrender egoic preferences[br]understanding that what is arising

0:32:27.322,0:32:33.794
is simply intense phenomena that actually[br]takes you deeper into connection with life

0:32:33.794,0:32:39.400
By remaining equanimous with what is,[br]we begin purifying the patterns of

0:32:39.400,0:32:47.290
resistance within the ego structure. [br]This brings us to the surrender paradox.

0:32:47.290,0:32:53.381
The surrender paradox is realizing that[br]whatever you resist persists.

0:32:53.381,0:33:00.450
The resistance actually gives power to the[br]ego. The ego is nothing but the

0:33:00.450,0:33:06.130
resistance itself. Sometimes on the path[br]we get the idea that we shouldn't

0:33:06.130,0:33:12.320
experience this or that emotion. We might[br]feel that we're regressing if we feel hate

0:33:12.320,0:33:19.300
or anger. The experience of the full range[br]of human emotions is necessary.

0:33:19.300,0:33:25.292
The paradox is that when we accept each[br]emotion fully, dropping the resistance

0:33:25.292,0:33:31.458
to it, it transmutes from emotion, which[br]is full of beliefs, judgments, and

0:33:31.458,0:33:37.130
and preferences, to pure feeling; [br]to pure aliveness,

0:33:37.130,0:33:43.170
which is beyond the evaluating mind.

0:33:47.460,0:33:54.000
There's a famous story in Zen that [br]illustrates this point. Once a student

0:33:54.000,0:34:01.308
asked Tenzin, a Zen master known for his[br]wisdom and tranquility, "Master when your

0:34:01.308,0:34:09.430
wife passed away did you feel sadness?" [br]Tenzin replied "Of course I felt sadness,

0:34:09.430,0:34:15.700
how could I not?" The student was puzzled[br]and then asked, "But I thought you were a

0:34:15.700,0:34:23.580
Zen master. Shouldn't you be beyond such[br]emotions?" Tenzin smiled gently and

0:34:23.580,0:34:30.870
responded, "Ah, you misunderstand.[br]When I felt sadness I allowed myself to

0:34:30.870,0:34:38.000
feel it fully, and to experience it deeply.[br]And in doing so I honored the truth of

0:34:38.000,0:34:44.860
that moment. Then like clouds passing[br]through the sky the sadness came and went.

0:34:45.380,0:34:57.470
But the sky, the vastness of my being, [br]remained unchanged.

0:35:02.920,0:35:10.640
My awakening began really when I was in [br]graduate school, when a series of personal

0:35:10.640,0:35:20.520
experiences really challenged me To begin [br]to question the purpose of life, of my

0:35:20.520,0:35:29.560
life in particular, and the meaning. [br]I began questioning, what's the point of

0:35:29.560,0:35:35.820
all that I was doing. The experience was[br]one of just being aware without being

0:35:35.820,0:35:43.947
anything in particular. It was very[br]liberating. There was a great sense of

0:35:43.947,0:35:52.280
release, like something that had been[br]under great pressure releasing, and there

0:35:52.280,0:35:58.220
was relaxation and exhilaration, and all[br]I remember was just being.

0:35:58.220,0:36:03.320
That's all I want to be... just be. Nothin[br]in particular. I call it the big shift

0:36:03.320,0:36:13.520
for me. It really changed... almost like[br]I want to say "inside out" but the way

0:36:13.520,0:36:19.090
I saw things and the way I experienced[br]things, the way I saw people, interacted

0:36:19.090,0:36:25.760
with people.. and the flip is in the sense[br]that all that I was experiencing,

0:36:25.760,0:36:34.330
no matter what I was doing or saying, [br]is simply awareness being expressed.

0:36:34.330,0:36:39.750
The awareness that I am being expressed,[br]so in that moment, in any moment,

0:36:39.750,0:36:45.360
whatever I was saying or doing, that's [br]all that was happening is being aware,

0:36:45.360,0:36:52.760
and that has stayed. But it has continued[br]to reveal its nature. It was like I could

0:36:52.760,0:37:01.140
see thoughts flowing by, and whatever[br]action needed to happen,

0:37:01.140,0:37:06.380
the action just came up and then the body[br]was just basically acting out the action.

0:37:06.380,0:37:10.810
It was no longer like before, whereas [br]before I would think something,

0:37:10.810,0:37:14.720
"I think I need to do this " and the "I" [br]this person would be doing it.

0:37:14.720,0:37:20.220
No. What's happening, what started to [br]happen was, I'm just being. Being aware

0:37:20.220,0:37:29.550
and actions just were arising and then the[br]body was the tool and I was watching it in

0:37:29.550,0:37:35.130
real time. The body is simply implementing [br]any action arising in awareness

0:37:35.130,0:37:39.800
and I happen to be a participant and an[br]observer. I think that's the best part.

0:37:41.790,0:37:49.190
Awareness is choiceless. The true Self is[br]beyond choosing. Upon hearing that,

0:37:49.190,0:37:54.740
one might say "okay I'm going to give up[br]everything. I'm just not going to choose

0:37:54.740,0:38:00.120
anything. I'll just sit in a cave. [br]And many people have done that.

0:38:00.120,0:38:06.629
But the problem is, that would still be a[br]choice. I'm just choosing to suppress my

0:38:06.629,0:38:13.490
choices and desires. It's the conditioned[br]mind choosing to not choose.

0:38:13.490,0:38:19.510
Both choosing and non-choosing are all at[br]the level of the conditioned mind.

0:38:19.510,0:38:24.120
But who or what is aware of that mind?

0:38:24.120,0:38:28.600
After awakening you will find the[br]conditioned self may still choose its

0:38:28.600,0:38:35.530
favorite tea. It will still eat the diet[br]that is best for the body. It's not that

0:38:35.530,0:38:39.850
choosing isn't happening anymore. Many[br]choices are still happening,

0:38:39.850,0:38:45.960
arising all the time. But the difference[br]is the sense of "I" is not entangled

0:38:45.960,0:38:51.220
with any of that. The "I" thought has[br]dropped away.

0:38:51.220,0:39:01.560
"I" am not choosing, [br]nor am I suppressing choice.

0:39:03.160,0:39:09.350
So waking up is like demolishing the[br]invisible walls of the ego, this armor,

0:39:09.350,0:39:15.990
and recognizing our Oneness with it all.[br]And the result is outstanding because

0:39:15.990,0:39:20.770
we discovered that we were not suffering[br]anger, pain, sadness... we were suffering

0:39:20.770,0:39:27.890
our refusal of life, and we can learn to[br]be so open that we are

0:39:27.890,0:39:32.680
consciously one with life as it is.

0:39:32.680,0:39:40.570
We'd rather feel good than suffer.. that's[br]just normal, something in the human

0:39:40.570,0:39:48.520
being, the ordinary species of homo[br]sapiens, would rather feel good

0:39:48.520,0:39:56.960
than feel bad. And I think that in the[br]times when we become aware that

0:39:56.960,0:40:02.920
it actually feels good to be conscious,[br]something in us registers in the ordinary

0:40:02.920,0:40:12.110
human brain, "Oh, I like this. This is [br]possible." And it reinforces itself.

0:40:12.110,0:40:17.980
Awakening can happen in stages gradually,[br]or it can happen all at once in a

0:40:17.980,0:40:24.360
radical flip, where we suddenly know who[br]we are, as if waking from a dream.

0:40:24.360,0:40:31.550
As if we've been asleep all our lives in[br]our dream character. To stay awake

0:40:31.550,0:40:36.220
there is an ongoing purification of the [br]self structure required.

0:40:36.220,0:40:43.308
Even if we have a full awakening it is[br]important to be vigilant, to not believe

0:40:43.308,0:40:49.840
the next thought, to remain equanimous[br]with what is when unconscious thoughts

0:40:49.840,0:40:56.800
surface. Otherwise the unconscious[br]patterns of the mind may obscure the truth

0:40:56.800,0:41:04.290
The unconscious must become a transparent[br]unconscious. If we do not face what is in

0:41:04.290,0:41:10.070
the unconscious we'll fall into what has[br]been called spiritual bypassing.

0:41:10.070,0:41:16.960
Spiritual bypassing refers to the tendency[br]of some individuals to insist that they

0:41:16.960,0:41:23.660
are already awake in order to avoid [br]dealing with difficult emotions, unresolved

0:41:23.660,0:41:30.670
psychological issues, or real life[br]challenges. The egoic mind can appropriate

0:41:30.670,0:41:37.950
a glimpse of awakening and keep one[br]from living from that place of truth.

0:41:37.950,0:41:43.430
I was sitting on my bed thinking about the[br]mammogram I was about to go for the

0:41:43.430,0:41:50.610
next day, and it had always been an [br]extreme anxiety producing experience

0:41:50.610,0:42:00.930
which I had once a year, and I was tired [br]of feeling so scared. Tired of being afraid

0:42:00.930,0:42:07.310
of dying and I was sitting on the bed and[br]out of the blue I had this thought

0:42:07.310,0:42:17.040
Couldn't I do this thing tomorrow without[br]freaking out? And there was a thought

0:42:17.040,0:42:28.030
really, just a thought but suddenly I[br]felt this surge of a realization that

0:42:28.030,0:42:38.630
I could indeed. And I didn't know how[br]I knew that. I didn't know what had just

0:42:38.630,0:42:47.860
changed, but something clearly had just[br]changed. And I was stunned and I suddenly

0:42:47.860,0:42:55.260
knew that it was going to be different [br]from all the terrible anxiety I'd had

0:42:55.260,0:43:01.000
all the years prior. And that didn't mean[br]that the mammogram was going to

0:43:01.000,0:43:05.290
turn out fine. It didn't mean[br]I didn't have breast cancer.

0:43:05.290,0:43:12.800
That was really bizarre to me. It was a[br]stunner and I got up and went in to my

0:43:12.800,0:43:21.150
partner who was busy at his computer[br]and I just stood in the doorway and

0:43:21.150,0:43:24.160
he finally looked up he realized I was[br]there and he said "What?"

0:43:24.160,0:43:35.260
And I said, something's just happened. [br]And I told him in the coming days little

0:43:35.260,0:43:40.190
by little I began to realize it wasn't[br]just that fear didn't seem to animate me

0:43:40.190,0:43:50.920
anymore. I felt peaceful, completely [br]without my ordinary ongoing stress.

0:43:50.920,0:43:59.240
My mind was still. My outer life was[br]basically the same but it was many months

0:43:59.240,0:44:03.750
before I understood that this was [br]awakening that had happened.

0:44:03.750,0:44:09.140
It was a long time really. All I knew was[br]I didn't hurt anymore in the way I had.

0:44:10.460,0:44:16.520
And my mind was quiet and it's been like[br]that ever since.

0:44:17.890,0:44:24.874
There can be no memory of awakening itself[br]There is only memory of experiences and

0:44:24.874,0:44:31.330
phenomena. Whenever there is a memory[br]there's always some resistance trace in

0:44:31.330,0:44:37.381
the mind. This resistance [br]trace is the original repetition...

0:44:37.381,0:44:43.080
the beginning of the "I" thought. [br]Awakening itself does not leave a trace

0:44:43.080,0:44:50.040
in the mind. It is not an experience. [br]Primordial awareness wakes up to itself

0:44:50.040,0:44:58.374
in the now, unmediated by memory and the[br]filtering of the mind. If we are chasing

0:44:58.374,0:45:05.370
any state, any experience, and trying to[br]live there, then we've missed it.

0:45:05.370,0:45:11.770
If it comes and goes, if it's not here now[br]then it's not your true nature.

0:45:16.140,0:45:22.830
Let's take a moment to inquire directly [br]into our true nature. Directly means

0:45:22.830,0:45:31.350
not via the mind. You cannot recognize [br]that which is beyond the mind by means

0:45:31.350,0:45:41.830
of the mind. Shift your attention inward [br]and be aware of this moment. Become aware

0:45:41.830,0:45:50.280
of awareness itself. Notice the thoughts,[br]sensations and emotions that arise within

0:45:50.280,0:45:57.760
this space, but also recognize the[br]spaciousness within which they arise.

0:45:58.600,0:46:04.660
Phenomena may bubble up from the[br]unconscious. Thoughts, memories,

0:46:04.660,0:46:11.560
feelings, emotions, energies; this is a[br]natural clearing process that unfolds

0:46:11.560,0:46:18.680
when we inquire. Just be open to anything[br]that arises as a result of your inquiry.

0:46:18.680,0:46:24.270
Allow yourself to abide [br]in the natural state of the mind,

0:46:24.270,0:46:32.280
free from the limitations of[br]conceptual elaboration.

0:46:36.070,0:46:43.400
So my own awakening occurred in[br]essentially two fundamentally different

0:46:43.400,0:46:51.710
movements. I approached the initial shift[br]from a place of suffering, profound

0:46:51.710,0:46:56.440
suffering, and I had known that it had[br]something to do with thoughts.

0:46:56.440,0:47:00.629
It had something to do with the way I was[br]thinking, the way I was perceiving the world,

0:47:00.629,0:47:06.700
the way I was perceiving myself. And this[br]led me into a direct investigation

0:47:06.700,0:47:12.730
of the nature of thought itself. And most[br]importantly the nature of the thinker;

0:47:12.730,0:47:17.440
the nature of the one who is seemingly[br]bound by those thoughts.

0:47:17.440,0:47:26.960
So with this direct investigation the[br]sense of being a thinker was dissolved and

0:47:26.960,0:47:33.120
with the sense of being a thinker being [br]dissolved, then all thought forms sort of

0:47:33.120,0:47:40.320
lost meaning to me. What I didn't realize[br]is when that happens we're left with a sort

0:47:40.320,0:47:48.280
of pure or unbound conscious experience.[br]And to me that was tremendously peaceful,

0:47:48.280,0:47:56.950
tremendously relieving of my suffering. [br]That was the first part of my awakening.

0:47:56.950,0:48:02.640
I had no idea even from there with the[br]clarity that was revealed, with the peace

0:48:02.640,0:48:08.260
that was revealed, that it could go deeper[br]That it could go a lot deeper.

0:48:08.260,0:48:15.680
So over a period of a few days the initial[br]glimpse, the initial very profound, very

0:48:15.680,0:48:25.760
releasing, and surprising experience broke [br]open into something that goes beyond the

0:48:25.760,0:48:32.810
human dimension; goes beyond the [br]confines of who I take myself to be

0:48:32.810,0:48:38.810
in any form at all. And how I take the [br]world to be in any form at all.

0:48:38.810,0:48:44.980
All of that was dismantled. [br]What was left, what is left it is

0:48:44.980,0:48:52.267
extremely difficult to actually formulate [br]into words, but through the book,

0:48:52.267,0:48:56.730
through direct interactions with people[br]who are interested in addressing this,

0:48:56.730,0:49:00.440
it can be revealed and it can be revealed[br]to that that person

0:49:00.440,0:49:05.890
if they're ready for it and interested[br]in investigating it themselves.

0:49:07.120,0:49:15.480
No one can tell you what the mind is,[br]what the matrix is, what you are.

0:49:15.480,0:49:22.500
To know the immeasurable, the ineffable,[br]the mind must be extraordinarily quiet

0:49:22.500,0:49:28.560
and still without any movement. [br]In that deep quiet and profound

0:49:28.560,0:49:33.576
silence there's a possibility of coming[br]upon something which is

0:49:33.576,0:49:40.410
timeless, eternal and beyond all measure.

0:49:40.410,0:49:47.710
Let's say, to make a metaphor that [br]awakening is when your head,

0:49:47.710,0:49:52.110
the head of the ego, [br]has been chopped by life.

0:49:52.110,0:49:57.067
You saw clearly that you are not your[br]bodymind. You're not an entity

0:49:57.067,0:50:02.240
inside the bodymind but yes, the[br]head has been chopped by life

0:50:02.240,0:50:06.870
but it's still rolling down the hill,[br]and as it's rolling down the hill

0:50:06.870,0:50:13.258
it carries with it old patterns, old[br]schemes, old point of views, that are

0:50:13.258,0:50:18.830
no more nourished by your attention.[br]You're resting in the witnessing solidly,

0:50:18.830,0:50:23.720
you see these old patterns unfolding,[br]you're not involved with them,

0:50:23.720,0:50:27.580
but they're still happening. [br]So the head is rolling down the hill

0:50:27.580,0:50:34.040
but at a certain point it is going to [br]stop. No more movement of old karmas

0:50:34.040,0:50:39.680
coming into action. No more patterns[br]emerging that you need to look for and

0:50:39.680,0:50:48.110
dissolve. They're gone. And that's Moksha,[br]that's Liberation. What I've been seeing

0:50:48.110,0:51:04.470
is a progressive opening up to seeing life[br]not as a person inside the body, but as

0:51:04.470,0:51:11.875
a peaceful silent witnessing of it in which[br]there were moments in which there was

0:51:11.875,0:51:17.600
just actions, but there was no doer[br]of those actions.

0:51:17.600,0:51:23.770
A dog was barking... it was just a barking[br]in the silence, or there was somebody

0:51:23.770,0:51:32.080
walking, or my body walking, and it was[br]just the walking. Not somebody walking.

0:51:32.080,0:51:36.950
And this was accompanied with the[br]silencing of the inner dialogue

0:51:36.950,0:51:43.520
that was sometimes accompanying my life.[br]So these moments of stepping out

0:51:43.520,0:51:48.090
of this sense of being a person came [br]more and more frequently.

0:51:48.090,0:51:53.080
And as this was happening[br]everything that I thought to be,

0:51:53.080,0:52:00.600
or to be engaged in life started[br]to have a different sense.

0:52:00.600,0:52:08.400
Instead of seeing like life against me or [br]difficult for me, or trying to ask to pray

0:52:08.400,0:52:22.810
for a change, I started to become able to[br]see that all that was aiming towards

0:52:22.810,0:52:28.320
something higher, to open my heart more.[br]To be more available to life.

0:52:28.320,0:52:32.963
I started to see that what I called[br]accidents or mistakes or things

0:52:32.963,0:52:38.880
I didn't like, they were not wrong, [br]and they were not against me.

0:52:38.880,0:52:44.770
They were actually showing me a deeper[br]reality which I was not in contact with.

0:52:44.770,0:52:50.301
So all prayers became more like an amen.[br]Thy will be done. All requests were

0:52:50.301,0:53:00.870
more like, help me to see where I'm still[br]refusing life, where I'm still refusing

0:53:00.870,0:53:07.830
something. Where I still am suffering[br]because I say no to the unfolding

0:53:07.830,0:53:13.240
of life itself. So there was an opening [br]up. And more this opening up to life

0:53:13.240,0:53:18.770
happened and more these moments[br]of conscious witnessing came.

0:53:18.770,0:53:27.360
Awakening is just the beginning of this[br]opening up. And it never ends in a way.

0:53:27.360,0:53:38.590
It is a never ending opening. And the more[br]this happens, more what we still see as

0:53:38.590,0:53:49.920
difficult as contraction as fear, you[br]really see that it's a trampoline towards

0:53:49.920,0:54:05.600
a higher love. A dimension of love, of[br]peace, of compassion, and we are all in it.

0:54:05.600,0:54:11.680
Even those we think they're not. [br]We are all taken in it.

0:54:15.820,0:54:20.430
We can know that consciousness exists.[br]That we can know for certain.

0:54:20.430,0:54:24.940
Everything else we can make educated[br]guesses about. Maybe very good guesses,

0:54:24.940,0:54:30.580
but guesses nonetheless. [br]Consciousness is the only pre theoretical

0:54:30.580,0:54:36.320
given fact of nature. Everything else are[br]theoretical abstractions that arise within

0:54:36.320,0:54:42.510
consciousness. Consciousness is the sole[br]axiom of nature. That it exists is the only

0:54:42.510,0:54:48.950
absolutely certain thing in nature. And I[br]can assure you that based on reasoning

0:54:48.950,0:54:53.020
and the empirical evidence coming out from[br]foundations of physics coming out from the

0:54:53.020,0:54:57.932
neuroscience of consciousness, it has [br]become extraordinarily unlikely that

0:54:57.932,0:55:02.660
consciousness is not fundamental. [br]To think of consciousness as secondary or

0:55:02.660,0:55:08.300
epiphenomenal leads to all kinds of [br]insoluble problems. So there is excellent

0:55:08.300,0:55:12.960
rational and empirical reason to take [br]consciousness as at least one of if not

0:55:12.960,0:55:18.580
the only fundamental building block of[br]nature. Physics is fundamentally a science

0:55:18.580,0:55:24.610
of perception. It's an attempt to account[br]for the patterns and regularities of the

0:55:24.610,0:55:30.200
world we perceive. It does not attempt[br]to transcend perception.

0:55:30.200,0:55:34.930
Even when physicists use instruments like [br]telescopes, microscopes, oscilloscope's,

0:55:34.930,0:55:39.490
or whatever-a-scopes you want, the output[br]of these instruments still needs

0:55:39.490,0:55:46.050
to be perceived. So everything in physics[br]gets filtered out through the paradigm

0:55:46.050,0:55:50.970
of perception, so to say. Physics is a [br]science of perception. Therefore it does

0:55:50.970,0:55:57.826
not make any attempt to see fundamentally[br]beyond the physical or fundamentally beyond

0:55:57.826,0:56:04.597
matter, because physicality and matter are[br]just other words for the world we perceive,

0:56:04.597,0:56:12.310
for the contents of perception. Life is [br]the instrument for its own understanding.

0:56:12.310,0:56:18.678
To understand life you don't unplug from[br]life. You don't unplug from that which

0:56:18.678,0:56:23.250
you're trying to understand. What you do[br]is you pay attention to what's happening,

0:56:23.250,0:56:29.070
try to capture the nuance. Ask yourself, [br]"What is this about? Why is this happening?

0:56:29.070,0:56:34.390
What does this mean?" Life in the world[br]is a book to be read and deciphered.

0:56:34.390,0:56:40.330
But we may get so caught up in an[br]understandable need to suffer less,

0:56:40.330,0:56:43.918
that we forget to read the book. [br]We forget to pay attention.

0:56:43.918,0:56:49.020
While the book is the key to its own[br]decipherment. If you decipher the book

0:56:49.020,0:56:55.600
of life you will automatically suffer less,[br]but you can't decipher it if you're not

0:56:55.600,0:56:58.670
with your eyes on the ball, [br]if you're not paying attention.

0:56:58.670,0:57:01.690
Life is the tool to its own understanding.

0:57:01.690,0:57:09.120
All the great religious and spiritual[br]traditions were founded on this

0:57:09.120,0:57:18.630
understanding. Namely that the there is [br]one infinite and indivisible reality which

0:57:18.630,0:57:28.490
shines in each of us, as the experience [br]"I am" and which appears to us as the world.

0:57:28.490,0:57:36.140
In other words there is an ocean of being [br]so to speak, that underlies everyone and

0:57:36.140,0:57:41.640
everything from which everyone and [br]everything derives its existence.

0:57:41.640,0:57:46.160
In which everyone and everything[br]lives, and into which it vanishes

0:57:46.160,0:57:51.480
and disappears. And this is really the[br]founding principle of all the great

0:57:51.480,0:57:56.950
religious traditions, this the recognition[br]of the the unity of Being.

0:57:56.950,0:58:06.110
The first Hermetic principle is that[br]"The all is mind, the universe is mental."

0:58:06.110,0:58:14.400
Wherever we look is the one mind. As[br]Rumi said, "Wherever I look, there is the

0:58:14.400,0:58:22.170
face of God." Whether we peer into the[br]micro world or into the macrocosm of space,

0:58:22.170,0:58:30.500
we find the one mind. Here is an image of[br]human neurons, and this is a simulated

0:58:30.500,0:58:35.440
image of Dark Matter distribution [br]throughout the Universe.

0:58:35.440,0:58:41.280
The Millennium run is a simulation done[br]by the Max Planck Institute using

0:58:41.280,0:58:47.513
supercomputers to create a representation[br]of the distribution and evolution of dark

0:58:47.513,0:58:53.680
matter in the universe. Dark Matter forms[br]a vast Cosmic web of interconnected

0:58:53.680,0:58:59.310
filaments and nodes which is visually[br]almost identical to neurons and the

0:58:59.310,0:59:05.310
neuropathways found in a human brain.[br]And the same pattern is ubiquitous

0:59:05.310,0:59:14.130
throughout nature. We can call it the [br]One Mind, or God or simply "all that is".

0:59:16.020,0:59:24.330
And what is referred to as God is not [br]some external being beyond and

0:59:24.330,0:59:31.840
prior to the world. God is the the being[br]that shines in each of us as the knowledge

0:59:31.840,0:59:41.210
"I am" and appears to us as the world. [br]So we could say from this point of view

0:59:41.210,0:59:46.980
in religious language, the world is the[br]appearance of the word of God, the Logos,

0:59:46.980,0:59:56.040
and that we are localizations [br]of God's mind within God's mind.

0:59:56.920,1:00:02.590
So how does one universal field of[br]subjectivity, one universal consciousness,

1:00:02.590,1:00:05.880
how does it appear to be many? [br]Because I can't read your thoughts,

1:00:05.880,1:00:09.203
presumably you can't read mine. [br]I don't know what's happening in the

1:00:09.203,1:00:15.680
galaxy of Andromeda, not even in China.[br]We don't have a full experience of the

1:00:15.680,1:00:22.480
entirety of nature, so how can this one[br]mind that nature is have these limitations

1:00:22.480,1:00:27.678
and appear to be many? [br]Well I think we know one natural process

1:00:27.678,1:00:32.560
that does exactly that. It's called [br]dissociation in psychiatry. It's a process

1:00:32.560,1:00:38.808
according to which one mind seemingly[br]fragments into multiple disjointed centers

1:00:38.808,1:00:46.410
of awareness. We have definitive empirical[br]evidence for this in people, in humans,

1:00:46.410,1:00:54.460
from neuroimaging and now I think we are[br]close to beginning to have an explicit

1:00:54.460,1:01:00.550
conceptual account of dissociation based[br]on integrated information theory, which is

1:01:00.550,1:01:04.940
the main theory in the neuroscience of[br]consciousness. When a dissociative boundary

1:01:04.940,1:01:10.810
forms you can only see what is across that[br]dissociative boundary through perception.

1:01:10.810,1:01:16.730
And what you then perceive [br]is matter, physicality. In other words

1:01:16.730,1:01:22.920
matter, physicality, is a conscious [br]appearance of a conscious process

1:01:22.920,1:01:27.510
from across a dissociative boundary.

1:01:29.160,1:01:34.140
Whether we describe these processes[br]in terms of modern theories or using

1:01:34.140,1:01:39.520
ancient models like the five skandhas,[br]what matters is that we make these

1:01:39.520,1:01:46.480
processes which are usually unconscious,[br]conscious. When they are made conscious

1:01:46.480,1:01:52.750
then resistance within the self structure[br]can be dropped. The unconscious operation

1:01:52.750,1:01:59.880
of "I" can be dropped. The perception that[br]we are a physical body, the perception

1:01:59.880,1:02:05.240
of sensations on the body, the [br]conceptualization of objects and things,

1:02:05.240,1:02:11.280
the identification with preferences towards [br]those things, and the sense that there is a

1:02:11.280,1:02:18.560
witness watching all of this, all of these [br]mind processes are to be realized as empty

1:02:18.560,1:02:26.600
of self. In other words we disidentify [br]from the phenomena while allowing it to be

1:02:26.600,1:02:34.860
exactly as it is. This is not a turning[br]away from life. Quite the contrary this is

1:02:34.860,1:02:40.408
a deepening of the intimacy with life.

1:02:41.328,1:02:48.530
My understanding that consciousness is [br]fundamental and precedes physicality,

1:02:48.530,1:02:53.720
over the years has fundamentally changed[br]my experience of life in the world and

1:02:53.720,1:02:59.560
what it means to be a human being alive in[br]the world. To me it happened slowly.

1:02:59.560,1:03:03.380
At first it was a merely conceptual [br]understanding in my head, and then

1:03:03.380,1:03:08.550
it sort of sunk into the body and started[br]modulating my emotions, my feelings,

1:03:08.550,1:03:14.090
and it changes everything. It changes what[br]you consider to be a well-lived life,

1:03:14.090,1:03:21.040
it changes what you consider to be goals[br]worthy of working towards, it changes

1:03:21.040,1:03:24.930
your perception of self, it changes your [br]relationship to other living creatures,

1:03:24.930,1:03:31.440
yeah it does change everything. Personal [br]goals in terms of status, power, money,

1:03:31.440,1:03:36.398
that has gone away. The awareness that my[br]life is not at all, has never been,

1:03:36.398,1:03:41.730
and will never be about me, but it's about[br]nature, and I'm just one local manifestation

1:03:41.730,1:03:48.040
of nature, that understanding leads to a[br]profound relaxation of that anxiety

1:03:48.040,1:03:52.395
that comes with the need to achieve [br]certain personal goals or with the

1:03:52.395,1:03:57.160
disappointment that comes when [br]you don't reach those personal goals.

1:03:57.160,1:04:03.040
All that stuff has gone. I live life now as a[br]form of service to Nature.

1:04:03.040,1:04:08.440
I'm open to doing whatever it is that [br]nature wants to do through me and

1:04:08.440,1:04:14.820
although that may sound like being [br]bonded to service like a slave it doesn't

1:04:14.820,1:04:20.670
feel like that. It feels like I no longer have[br]the oppressive overwhelming responsibility

1:04:20.670,1:04:25.400
to make myself personally happy. [br]Which is the most oppressive idea

1:04:25.400,1:04:29.610
that the human mind can have, which is[br]that your life is about you and therefore

1:04:29.610,1:04:33.850
you have the responsibility to be happy[br]so when you fail on that it's your failure

1:04:33.850,1:04:39.360
and then you start regretting it. [br]No, that has gone. It has disappeared.

1:04:39.360,1:04:44.580
That's one of the things that changed in[br]my life. A deeper understanding of reality

1:04:44.580,1:04:53.700
is directly conducive to empathy, to [br]mutual respect, to non egoic purposes.

1:04:53.700,1:04:57.410
It's conducive to less [br]addictive patterns of behavior.

1:04:57.410,1:05:03.640
So there is absolutely no doubt that if[br]humanity's understanding were deeper

1:05:03.640,1:05:09.130
and more pervasive, [br]life would definitely be better.

1:05:09.860,1:05:16.120
The solution to the world's problems is to[br]recognize the true source of the problems,

1:05:16.120,1:05:23.060
which is the ego that operates only for[br]its own interest. It doesn't matter what

1:05:23.060,1:05:30.890
the ego engages with; politics, religion,[br]economics, or education. As long as it

1:05:30.890,1:05:36.780
operates from the false premise that there[br]is a separate "I", then we will continue

1:05:36.780,1:05:43.110
to perpetuate suffering and separation. [br]The only solution for humanity now

1:05:43.110,1:05:47.620
is to wake up.

1:05:50.450,1:05:57.518
In Buddhism, when there is no longer a[br]sense of self as a separate thing, and at

1:05:57.518,1:06:05.680
the same time, no other than Self, it is[br]nirvana, the cessation of self-centered

1:06:05.680,1:06:11.760
activity, the cessation of delusion, [br]the cessation of dreaming,

1:06:11.760,1:06:17.220
and the waking up from the [br]character in the dream of life.

1:06:17.220,1:06:24.640
The Bible says the Word became flesh[br]and made His dwelling among us.

1:06:24.640,1:06:30.961
The Word is is often translated as Logos,[br]which is an ancient word with a profound

1:06:30.961,1:06:39.920
meaning. The logos is associated with[br]eternity, Truth and direct revelation.

1:06:39.920,1:06:45.310
You could say that it is through the Logos[br]or through Christ Consciousness,

1:06:45.310,1:06:58.120
or Buddha nature that [br]God's mind is made known.