WEBVTT 00:00:11.049 --> 00:00:12.671 I'm big Ben Franklin 00:00:12.671 --> 00:00:13.961 and this shant be pretty 00:00:13.961 --> 00:00:15.360 let me instruct you how we battle 00:00:15.360 --> 00:00:16.681 in the city of Philly 00:00:16.681 --> 00:00:18.206 you couldn't sell Rick James 00:00:18.206 --> 00:00:18.986 a bag of crack 00:00:18.986 --> 00:00:20.022 you're out of practice 00:00:20.022 --> 00:00:21.119 my victory's more certain 00:00:21.119 --> 00:00:22.250 than death or taxes 00:00:22.250 --> 00:00:23.125 fact is 00:00:23.125 --> 00:00:23.839 you're a hack 00:00:23.839 --> 00:00:25.065 wack QVC joke 00:00:25.065 --> 00:00:26.100 you peddle soap 00:00:26.100 --> 00:00:27.274 that cleans bird shit 00:00:27.274 --> 00:00:28.149 from my windows 00:00:28.149 --> 00:00:29.247 I'll craft a lyrical coffin 00:00:29.247 --> 00:00:30.741 and then spit the nails in 00:00:30.741 --> 00:00:31.999 call my Arthur Miller son 00:00:31.999 --> 00:00:33.845 cause it's death of a salesman 00:00:33.845 --> 00:00:34.910 Hi Billy Mays here 00:00:34.910 --> 00:00:36.500 with a special TV offer 00:00:36.500 --> 00:00:37.662 watch me crush this 00:00:37.662 --> 00:00:38.441 bald fat foppish founding father 00:00:38.441 --> 00:00:40.640 I'll take my awesome auger 00:00:40.640 --> 00:00:41.866 and sow your quaker oats 00:00:41.866 --> 00:00:43.519 I'll shoot your rhymes down 00:00:43.519 --> 00:00:45.012 like a regiment of red coats 00:00:45.012 --> 00:00:46.271 I'm the lord of the pitch 00:00:46.271 --> 00:00:47.666 and leader in home sales 00:00:47.666 --> 00:00:48.863 you're just a lumpy pumpkin 00:00:48.863 --> 00:00:50.483 who invented the mail 00:00:50.483 --> 00:00:51.647 Benny's got kite'n key 00:00:51.647 --> 00:00:53.001 but you're in for a shock 00:00:53.001 --> 00:00:54.367 when I strike you with bolts 00:00:54.367 --> 00:00:55.987 from my lightning rod cock 00:00:55.987 --> 00:00:57.535 Stop 00:00:57.535 --> 00:00:58.664 I protest these intolerable raps 00:00:58.664 --> 00:01:00.287 it takes just one easy payment 00:01:00.287 --> 00:01:01.321 for me to whoop your ass 00:01:01.321 --> 00:01:02.196 cause I'm mint 00:01:02.196 --> 00:01:03.071 I'm money 00:01:03.071 --> 00:01:04.532 I'm an educated gentleman 00:01:04.532 --> 00:01:05.694 so join or die Bill 00:01:05.694 --> 00:01:07.411 cause it's all about the Benjamin 00:01:07.411 --> 00:01:10.419 but wait, there's more... 00:01:27.795 --> 00:01:28.381 I can 00:01:28.381 --> 00:01:29.288 you following me camera guy? 00:01:29.288 --> 00:01:30.686 cause it's about to get furious 00:01:30.686 --> 00:01:31.945 you're gonna love my nuts 00:01:31.945 --> 00:01:33.555 until you're bi-focal-curious 00:01:33.555 --> 00:01:35.379 your boy George chopped down trees 00:01:35.379 --> 00:01:37.258 you couldn't break a piece of balsa 00:01:37.258 --> 00:01:38.387 slap chop your face 00:01:38.387 --> 00:01:40.073 make a double chin salsa 00:01:40.073 --> 00:01:41.266 your style is so broke 00:01:41.266 --> 00:01:42.494 they call you Poor Richard 00:01:42.494 --> 00:01:43.891 it's bad enough I gotta see you 00:01:43.891 --> 00:01:45.672 every time I tip a stripper 00:01:45.672 --> 00:01:46.802 Vince against a founding father 00:01:46.802 --> 00:01:48.062 is just too bad 00:01:48.062 --> 00:01:49.298 cause after this 00:01:49.298 --> 00:01:51.305 America is gonna lose a Dad 00:01:51.305 --> 00:01:52.626 Who won? 00:01:52.626 --> 00:01:54.056 Who's next? 00:01:54.056 --> 00:01:56.126 You decide