People have been using media to talk about sex for a long time.

Love letters, phone sex, racy polaroids.

There's even a story of a girl who eloped with a man that she met over the telegraph in 1886.

Today we have sexting

and I am a sexting expert.

Not an expert sexter--

(Laughter)

Though, I do know what this means

and I think you do too!

(Laughter)

I have been studying sexting since the media attention to it began in 2008.

I wrote a book on the moral panic about sexting,

and here's what I found:

Most people are worrying about the wrong thing.

They're trying to just prevent sexting from happening entirely,

but let me ask you this:

as long as it is completely consensual, what's the problem with sexting?

People are into all sorts of things that you may not be into,

like blue cheese or cilantro.

(Laughter)

Sexting is certainly risky, like anything that's fun,

but as long as you're not sending any image to someone who doesn't want to receive it,

there's no harm.

What I do think is a serious problem is when people share private images of others without their permission,

and instead of worrying about sexting,

what I think we need to do is think a lot more about digital privacy.

The key is consent.

Right now people are thinking about sexting without really thinking about consent at all.

Did you know that we currently criminalize teen sexting?

It can be a crime because it counts as child pornography

if there's an image of someone under eighteen,

and it doesn't even matter if they took that image of themselves

and shared it willingly.

So we end up with this bizarre legal situation

where two 17-year-olds can have sex in most U.S. states,

but they can't photograph it.

Some states have also tried passing sexting misdemeanor laws,

but these laws repeat the same problem

because they still make consensual sexting illegal.

It doesn't make sense to try to ban all sexting to try to address privacy violations.

This is kind of like saying, "let's solve the problem of date rape by just making dating completely illegal."

Most teens don't get arrested for sexting, but can you guess who does?

It's often teens who are disliked by their partners parents,

and this can be because of class bias, racism, or homophobia.

Most prosecutors are, of course, smart enough not to use child pornography charges against teenagers,

but some do.

According to researchers at the University of New Hampshire,

seven percent of all child pornography possession arrests are teen sexting consensually with other teens.

Child pornography is a serious crime

but it's just not the same thing as teen sexting.

Parents and educators are also responding to sexting

without really thinking too much about consent.

Their message to teens is often just don't do it,

and I totally get it.

There are serious legal risks and of course that potential for privacy violations.

And when you were a teen, I'm sure you did exactly as you were told, right?

You're probably thinking, "My kid would never sext,"

and that's true; your little angel may not be sexting

because only 33 percent of 16 and 17-year-olds are sexting.

But, sorry, by the time they're older

the odds are that they will be sexting.

Every study I've seen puts the rate above 50 percent for 18 to 24-year-olds.

And most of the time, nothing goes wrong.

People asking me all the time things like,

"isn't sexting just so dangerous, though?

It's like you wouldn't leave your wallet on a park bench and just exp