0:00:18.524,0:00:23.564
People have been using media[br]to talk about sex for a long time.

0:00:23.564,0:00:27.345
Love letters, phone sex, racy Polaroids.

0:00:27.345,0:00:30.595
There's even a story of a girl who eloped

0:00:30.595,0:00:35.256
with a man that she met[br]over the telegraph in 1886.

0:00:35.256,0:00:36.556
(Laughter)

0:00:36.556,0:00:39.196
Today we have sexting.

0:00:39.196,0:00:41.617
And I am a sexting expert.

0:00:41.617,0:00:43.837
Not an expert sexter -

0:00:43.837,0:00:44.846
(Laughter)

0:00:44.846,0:00:47.807
though, I do know what this means

0:00:47.807,0:00:48.917
and I think you do too!

0:00:48.917,0:00:50.137
[it's a penis]

0:00:50.137,0:00:52.306
(Laughter)

0:00:52.306,0:00:54.377
I have been studying sexting

0:00:54.377,0:00:58.577
since the media attention[br]to it began in 2008.

0:00:58.577,0:01:01.660
I wrote a book on the moral[br]panic about sexting,

0:01:01.660,0:01:03.359
and here's what I found:

0:01:03.359,0:01:06.459
Most people are worrying[br]about the wrong thing.

0:01:06.459,0:01:10.779
They're trying to just prevent sexting[br]from happening entirely,

0:01:10.779,0:01:12.209
but let me ask you this:

0:01:12.209,0:01:17.179
As long as it's completely consensual,[br]what's the problem with sexting?

0:01:17.179,0:01:21.220
People are into all sorts of things[br]that you may not be into,

0:01:21.220,0:01:23.756
like blue cheese or cilantro.

0:01:23.756,0:01:26.561
(Laughter)

0:01:26.561,0:01:30.762
Sexting is certainly risky,[br]like anything that's fun,

0:01:30.762,0:01:31.772
but...

0:01:31.772,0:01:32.781
(Laughter)

0:01:32.781,0:01:37.352
as long as you are not sending an image[br]to someone who doesn't want to receive it,

0:01:37.352,0:01:39.131
there's no harm.

0:01:39.131,0:01:41.892
What I do think is a serious problem

0:01:41.892,0:01:46.873
is when people share private images[br]of others without their permission,

0:01:47.283,0:01:49.702
and instead of worrying about sexting,

0:01:49.702,0:01:54.803
what I think we need to do[br]is think a lot more about digital privacy.

0:01:54.803,0:01:57.114
The key is consent.

0:01:57.544,0:02:00.874
Right now, most people[br]are thinking about sexting

0:02:00.874,0:02:04.325
without really thinking[br]about consent at all.

0:02:04.325,0:02:08.355
Did you know that we currently[br]criminalize teen sexting?

0:02:09.295,0:02:12.715
It can be a crime because[br]it counts as child pornography

0:02:12.715,0:02:15.716
if there's an image[br]of someone under 18,

0:02:15.716,0:02:19.385
and it doesn't even matter[br]if they took that image of themselves

0:02:19.385,0:02:21.716
and shared it willingly.

0:02:21.716,0:02:24.716
So we end up with[br]this bizarre legal situation

0:02:24.716,0:02:29.226
where two 17-year-olds[br]can legally have sex in most U.S. states,

0:02:29.226,0:02:31.427
but they can't photograph it.

0:02:32.587,0:02:36.678
Some states have also tried passing[br]sexting misdemeanor laws,

0:02:36.678,0:02:39.778
but these laws repeat the same problem

0:02:39.778,0:02:43.858
because they still make[br]consensual sexting illegal.

0:02:44.418,0:02:47.718
It doesn't make sense[br]to try to ban all sexting

0:02:47.718,0:02:50.379
to try to address privacy violations.

0:02:50.379,0:02:51.979
This is kind of like saying,

0:02:51.979,0:02:57.820
"Let's solve the problem of date rape[br]by just making dating completely illegal."

0:02:59.010,0:03:04.450
Most teens don't get arrested for sexting,[br]but can you guess who does?

0:03:04.450,0:03:09.362
It's often teens who are disliked[br]by their partner's parents,

0:03:09.362,0:03:14.571
and this can be because of class bias,[br]racism, or homophobia.

0:03:14.915,0:03:17.686
Most prosecutors are,[br]of course, smart enough

0:03:17.686,0:03:21.865
not to use child pornography[br]charges against teenagers,

0:03:21.865,0:03:23.605
but some do.

0:03:23.605,0:03:27.165
According to researchers[br]at the University of New Hampshire,

0:03:27.165,0:03:31.777
seven percent of all child[br]pornography possession arrests

0:03:31.777,0:03:36.397
are teens sexting consensually[br]with other teens.

0:03:37.417,0:03:39.958
Child pornography is a serious crime,

0:03:39.958,0:03:44.068
but it's just not the same thing[br]as teen sexting.

0:03:44.978,0:03:48.308
Parents and educators[br]are also responding to sexting

0:03:48.308,0:03:51.419
without really thinking[br]too much about consent.

0:03:51.419,0:03:56.069
Their message to teens[br]is often 'just don't do it,'

0:03:56.069,0:03:57.639
and I totally get it.

0:03:57.639,0:03:59.619
There are serious legal risks,

0:03:59.619,0:04:03.300
and of course, that potential[br]for privacy violations.

0:04:03.300,0:04:08.516
And when you were a teen, I'm sure you did[br]exactly as you were told, right?

0:04:09.366,0:04:12.841
You're probably thinking,[br]"My kid would never sext,"

0:04:12.841,0:04:16.307
and that's true; your little angel[br]may not be sexting

0:04:16.307,0:04:22.298
because only 33 percent[br]of 16- and 17-year-olds are sexting.

0:04:23.058,0:04:25.438
But, sorry, by the time they're older,

0:04:25.438,0:04:27.651
odds are, they will be sexting.

0:04:27.651,0:04:34.103
Every study I've seen puts the rate[br]above 50 percent for 18- to 24-year-olds.

0:04:34.603,0:04:37.803
And most of the time, nothing goes wrong.

0:04:38.273,0:04:40.933
People ask me all the time things like,

0:04:40.933,0:04:43.703
"Isn't sexting just so dangerous, though?

0:04:43.703,0:04:47.323
You wouldn't leave your wallet[br]on a park bench.

0:04:47.323,0:04:51.394
You expect it's going to get stolen[br]if you do that, right?"

0:04:51.394,0:04:52.775
Here's how I think about it:

0:04:52.775,0:04:56.675
Sexting is like leaving your wallet[br]at your boyfriend's house.

0:04:56.675,0:05:01.475
If you come back the next day[br]and all the money is just gone,

0:05:01.475,0:05:04.276
you really need to dump that guy.

0:05:04.276,0:05:06.885
(Laughter)

0:05:07.845,0:05:12.746
So instead of criminalizing sexting to try[br]to prevent these privacy violations,

0:05:12.746,0:05:16.057
instead, we need to make consent central

0:05:16.057,0:05:20.498
to how we think about that circulation[br]of our private information.

0:05:20.868,0:05:25.188
Every new media technology[br]raises privacy concerns;

0:05:25.188,0:05:29.758
in fact, in the U.S.,[br]the first major debates about privacy

0:05:29.758,0:05:34.249
were in response to technologies[br]that were relatively new at the time.

0:05:34.249,0:05:38.229
In the late 1800s,[br]people were worried about cameras,

0:05:38.229,0:05:41.730
which were just suddenly[br]more portable than ever before,

0:05:41.730,0:05:44.130
and newspaper gossip columns.

0:05:44.130,0:05:48.030
They were worried that the camera[br]would capture information about them,

0:05:48.030,0:05:51.639
take it out of context,[br]and widely disseminate it.

0:05:51.639,0:05:53.241
Does this sound familiar?

0:05:53.241,0:05:58.200
It's exactly what we're worrying about now[br]with social media, and drone cameras,

0:05:58.200,0:06:00.321
and of course, sexting.

0:06:00.321,0:06:03.652
And these fears about technology,[br]they make sense,

0:06:03.652,0:06:06.372
because technologies can amplify

0:06:06.372,0:06:10.563
and bring out our worst[br]qualities and behaviors.

0:06:10.563,0:06:12.893
But there are solutions,

0:06:12.893,0:06:17.193
and we've been here before[br]with a dangerous new technology.

0:06:17.193,0:06:21.023
In 1908, Ford introduced the Model T car.

0:06:21.023,0:06:24.912
Traffic fatality rates were rising;[br]it was a serious problem.

0:06:24.912,0:06:27.113
It looks so safe, right?

0:06:27.113,0:06:28.474
(Laughter)

0:06:29.234,0:06:33.245
Our first response was[br]to try to change drivers' behavior,

0:06:33.245,0:06:37.285
so we developed speed limits[br]and enforced them through fines.

0:06:37.285,0:06:40.765
But over the following decades[br]we started to realize

0:06:40.765,0:06:44.716
the technology of the car itself[br]is not just neutral.

0:06:44.716,0:06:47.966
We could design the car to make it safer.

0:06:47.966,0:06:51.466
So in the 1920s, we got[br]shatter-resistant windshields;

0:06:51.466,0:06:57.076
in the 1950s, seat belts;[br]and in the 1990s, air bags.

0:06:58.256,0:07:03.307
All three of these areas - laws,[br]individuals, and industry,

0:07:03.307,0:07:09.348
came together over time to help solve[br]the problems that a new technology causes

0:07:09.348,0:07:12.918
and we can do the same thing[br]with digital privacy.

0:07:12.918,0:07:16.218
Of course, it comes back to consent.

0:07:16.218,0:07:17.558
Here's the idea:

0:07:17.558,0:07:21.239
before anyone can distribute[br]your private information,

0:07:21.239,0:07:24.069
they should have to get your permission.

0:07:24.069,0:07:29.020
This idea of affirmative consent[br]comes from anti-rape activists

0:07:29.020,0:07:32.760
who tell us that we need consent[br]for every sexual act.

0:07:32.760,0:07:37.327
And we have really high standards[br]for consent in a lot of other areas.

0:07:37.327,0:07:39.127
Think about having surgery.

0:07:39.127,0:07:42.189
Your doctor has to make sure[br]that you are meaningfully

0:07:42.189,0:07:45.359
and knowingly consenting[br]to that medical procedure.

0:07:45.359,0:07:49.098
This is not the type of consent[br]with like an iTunes Terms of Service

0:07:49.098,0:07:53.009
where you just scroll to the bottom[br]and you're like, "Agree, agree, whatever."

0:07:53.009,0:07:54.460
(Laughter)

0:07:55.079,0:08:00.260
If we think more about consent,[br]we can have better privacy laws.

0:08:00.260,0:08:03.681
Right now we just don't have[br]that many protections.

0:08:03.681,0:08:07.381
If your ex-husband[br]or your ex-wife is a terrible person,

0:08:07.381,0:08:11.531
they can take your nude photos[br]and upload them to a porn site.

0:08:11.531,0:08:14.750
It can be really hard[br]to get those images taken down

0:08:14.750,0:08:16.022
and in a lot of states,

0:08:16.022,0:08:19.912
you're actually better off[br]if you took the images of yourself

0:08:19.912,0:08:23.122
because then you can file[br]a copyright claim.

0:08:23.472,0:08:24.760
(Laughter)

0:08:25.353,0:08:28.283
Right now, if someone[br]violates your privacy,

0:08:28.283,0:08:32.644
whether that's an individual[br]or a company or the NSA,

0:08:33.154,0:08:38.044
you can try filing a lawsuit,[br]but you may not be successful

0:08:38.044,0:08:42.904
because many courts assume[br]that digital privacy is just impossible,

0:08:42.904,0:08:46.694
so they're not willing to punish[br]anyone for violating it.

0:08:47.154,0:08:50.055
I still hear people[br]asking me all the time,

0:08:50.055,0:08:55.366
"Isn't a digital image somehow blurring[br]the line between public and private

0:08:55.366,0:08:57.556
because it's digital, right?"

0:08:57.556,0:08:58.936
No, no!

0:08:58.936,0:09:02.236
Everything digital[br]is not just automatically public.

0:09:02.236,0:09:04.086
That doesn't make any sense.

0:09:04.086,0:09:07.597
As NYU legal scholar,[br]Helen Nissenbaum, tells us,

0:09:07.597,0:09:10.326
we have laws and policies and norms

0:09:10.326,0:09:13.467
that protect all kinds[br]of information that's private,

0:09:13.467,0:09:16.846
and it doesn't make a difference[br]if it's digital or not.

0:09:16.846,0:09:19.628
All of your health records are digitized,

0:09:19.628,0:09:22.748
but your doctor can't just[br]share them with anyone.

0:09:22.748,0:09:27.098
All of your financial information[br]is held in digital databases,

0:09:27.098,0:09:32.039
but your credit card company can't just[br]post your purchase history online.

0:09:32.879,0:09:38.010
Better laws could help address[br]privacy violations after they happen,

0:09:38.420,0:09:40.999
but one of the easiest[br]things we can all do

0:09:40.999,0:09:45.930
is make personal changes[br]to help protect each others' privacy.

0:09:46.250,0:09:51.271
We're always told that privacy[br]is our own sole individual responsibility.

0:09:51.271,0:09:55.431
We're told, "Constantly monitor[br]and update your privacy settings."

0:09:55.431,0:10:00.902
We're told, "Never share anything you[br]wouldn't want the entire world to see."

0:10:01.352,0:10:02.522
This doesn't make sense.

0:10:02.522,0:10:05.582
Digital media are social environments

0:10:05.582,0:10:10.413
and we share things with people[br]we trust all day, every day.

0:10:10.723,0:10:13.613
As Princeton researcher,[br]Janet Vertesi, argues,

0:10:13.613,0:10:15.923
our data and our privacy,

0:10:15.923,0:10:20.284
they're not just personal,[br]they're actually interpersonal.

0:10:20.284,0:10:25.704
So one thing you can do that's really easy[br]is just start asking for permission

0:10:25.704,0:10:28.654
before you share[br]anyone else's information.

0:10:28.654,0:10:33.335
If you want to post a photo[br]of someone online, ask for permission.

0:10:33.335,0:10:37.076
If you want to forward an email thread,[br]ask for permission.

0:10:37.076,0:10:39.776
If you want to share[br]someone's nude selfie,

0:10:39.776,0:10:42.466
obviously, ask for permission!

0:10:43.386,0:10:47.826
These individual changes can help us[br]protect each others' privacy,

0:10:47.826,0:10:52.246
but we need technology companies[br]on board as well.

0:10:52.246,0:10:56.697
These companies have very little incentive[br]to help protect our privacy

0:10:56.697,0:10:58.969
because their business models depend on us

0:10:58.969,0:11:02.918
sharing everything[br]with as many people as possible.

0:11:02.918,0:11:04.988
Right now, if I send you an image,

0:11:04.988,0:11:08.008
you can forward that[br]to anyone that you want.

0:11:08.008,0:11:12.319
But what if I got to decide[br]if that image was forwardable or not?

0:11:12.319,0:11:16.379
This would tell you, "You don't have[br]my permission to send this image out."

0:11:16.379,0:11:20.600
We do this kind of thing all the time[br]to protect copyright.

0:11:20.600,0:11:25.300
If you buy an e-book, you can't just[br]send it out to as many people as you want,

0:11:25.300,0:11:28.371
so why not try this with mobile phones?

0:11:29.151,0:11:32.291
What you can do is we can demand[br]that tech companies

0:11:32.291,0:11:37.651
add these protections to our devices[br]and our platforms as the default.

0:11:37.651,0:11:41.061
After all, you can choose[br]the color of your car,

0:11:41.061,0:11:44.342
but the airbags are always standard.

0:11:45.432,0:11:49.223
If we don't think more[br]about digital privacy and consent,

0:11:49.223,0:11:52.053
there can be serious consequences.

0:11:52.573,0:11:55.003
There was a teenager from Ohio -

0:11:55.003,0:11:58.509
let's call her Jennifer[br]for the sake of her privacy -

0:11:58.509,0:12:02.143
she shared nude photos of herself[br]with her high school boyfriend

0:12:02.143,0:12:04.040
thinking she could trust him.

0:12:05.080,0:12:10.034
Unfortunately, he betrayed her and sent[br]her photos around the entire school.

0:12:10.034,0:12:14.064
Jennifer was embarrassed and humiliated,

0:12:14.064,0:12:18.205
but instead of being compassionate,[br]her classmates harassed her.

0:12:18.205,0:12:22.626
They called her a slut and a whore[br]and they made her life miserable.

0:12:22.626,0:12:26.795
Jennifer started missing school,[br]and her grades dropped.

0:12:26.795,0:12:31.137
Ultimately, Jennifer decided[br]to end her own life.

0:12:32.067,0:12:34.697
Jennifer did nothing wrong.

0:12:34.697,0:12:37.127
All she did was share a nude photo

0:12:37.127,0:12:39.818
with someone that she thought[br]that she could trust.

0:12:39.818,0:12:42.558
And yet, our laws tell her

0:12:42.558,0:12:47.317
that she committed a horrible crime[br]equivalent to child pornography.

0:12:47.317,0:12:52.068
Our gender norms tell her that[br]by producing this nude image of herself,

0:12:52.068,0:12:55.779
she somehow did the most[br]horrible, shameful thing.

0:12:55.779,0:12:59.860
And when we assume that privacy[br]is impossible in digital media,

0:12:59.860,0:13:05.950
we completely write off and excuse[br]her boyfriend's bad, bad behavior.

0:13:06.420,0:13:12.251
People are still saying all the time[br]to victims of privacy violations,

0:13:12.251,0:13:13.610
"What were you thinking?

0:13:13.610,0:13:16.390
You should've never sent that image."

0:13:16.950,0:13:21.552
If you're trying to figure out[br]what to say instead, try this:

0:13:21.552,0:13:25.442
Imagine you've run into your friend[br]who broke their leg skiing.

0:13:25.442,0:13:30.102
They took a risk to do something fun,[br]and it didn't end well.

0:13:30.102,0:13:32.693
But you're probably[br]not going to be the jerk who says,

0:13:32.693,0:13:35.823
"Well, I guess you shouldn't[br]have gone skiing then!"

0:13:37.343,0:13:39.563
If we think more about consent,

0:13:39.563,0:13:44.594
we can see that victims of privacy[br]violations deserve our compassion,

0:13:44.594,0:13:49.784
not criminalization, shaming,[br]harassment, or punishment.

0:13:49.784,0:13:54.335
We can support victims,[br]and we can prevent some privacy violations

0:13:54.335,0:13:59.145
by making these legal, individual,[br]and technological changes.

0:13:59.145,0:14:04.935
Because the problem is not sexting,[br]the issue is digital privacy,

0:14:04.935,0:14:07.876
and one solution is consent.

0:14:07.876,0:14:12.637
So the next time a victim[br]of a privacy violation comes up to you,

0:14:12.637,0:14:15.346
instead of blaming them,[br]let's do this instead:

0:14:15.346,0:14:18.807
Let's shift our ideas[br]about digital privacy

0:14:18.807,0:14:22.027
and let's respond with compassion.

0:14:22.027,0:14:23.437
Thank you.

0:14:23.437,0:14:26.087
(Applause)