[Script Info]
Title: 
[Events]
Format: Layer, Start, End, Style, Name, MarginL, MarginR, MarginV, Effect, Text
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"I'll be quick like Nestle and beat it like
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Michael Jackson. That's why your neighbor
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,said I remind him of Nicholas Cage.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,'Cause I'm gone in 60 seconds.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But watch this right here. Then look.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Who does this the most on the window,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the kids, the dogs, or the ugly black guys
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that eat fried chicken? Now you see
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,these water spots. Look, they get whiter
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,than my elbows without lotion. Watch this.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(chuckle) 'Cause Stevie Wonder said, "seeing
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is believing." And I got a disease called
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,enthusiasm. So I'm a cut straight to
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the mustard. Watch this though.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Don't laugh too hard 'cause the neighbors
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,gone see this black kid scrubbing your
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,window, OK. (laugh) Look, wax on, wax off
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like Mr Miagi. Remember "The Karate Kid?"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now watch this. It air dry. Look it puts a coating
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,on your window. No water spots, no fingerprints,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,no streaks. That's why we can't sell it
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to criminals. Don't tell OJ or Tiger Woods, ok.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hi-five that. They been loving this stuff.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now, then y'all. You and mom y'all would agree
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh my God! You see this right here.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Who did that? (customer) "I did that." OK, watch this.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now my mom said if it's darker than me
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and it don't pay the bills, it shouldn't be there
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,right?" (laugh) "God bless you. HAHAHA.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now look this right here, we just upgraded
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like Beyonce. This is our new surfactant.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hold this and watch this cause this should be
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the main reason why you get the HBO
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,special. You know what HBO mean?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(customer)"No." You get to help a brother out. (laugh)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I been on a roll like toilet paper. Half of
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,your neighbors in the community say they
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,just gonna get it 'cause I'm funny.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,'Cause this stuff sells itself. Look, you
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,just go back and forth like an argument. (laugh)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now I ain't like Jesus. But look how it split down the middle like Moses did the Red Sea.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Paint me green and call me a pickle.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And look at this right here. Look. Goes good with chicken.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Don't drink it though. It'll give you the Hershey squirts.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But that one bottle lasts longer than my last relationship.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Y'all got water right. (customer)"Yeah." (laughs).
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,High five! You're qualified to use it.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Over here mama. Now, this is my last demo.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I'm outta here quicker than your favorite shampoo.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Y'all familiar with these right here Sharpies? (customer)"Yeah."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now watch this. Even though I'm Black, it ain't black magic.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It just work. 'Cause look.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Say you got this in the clothes, or the carpet, or the laundry.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Would you agree that's hard to get out? (customer)"Prob'ly"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Would you throw it out, Shout it out, get OJ to stab it out, Mike Tyson to bite it
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(customer)"Throw it out."