WEBVTT

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Hello all

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I'm Evildea. Your God.

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and today we're moving to
a new hotel

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but at the same time we will
catch that bus

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which will guide us around
the local sights here

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So, we'll do that and of course
you'll come with me

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So, I'm not entirely sure

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but I think that this bus is
only for us

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It seems, that no one's coming
with us

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So, we'll have the entire bus to us

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Oh shit

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What is that?

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Do I look beautiful?

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So, we just arrived at the first
location for our tour

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So, soon you'll see a bridge

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and it doesn't look that interesting

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but the bridge's history
is a bit interesting

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So, the bridge is there

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and according to our guide,
an old woman paid to build it

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before she paid for it,
there wasn't a bridge

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and she built it to help the
children of this village

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she mainly did it because
she didn't have any children herself

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and she liked to play
with the children

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So, as you can see

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the bridge is very old

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it's made of wood

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There's a child there

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and a donation bin there

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and my father-in-law
has already donated

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the donation bin is simply so

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they can improve the bridge

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and repair it when it gets old

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So, this village was founded in
the 14th century

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So, it's pretty old

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but according to our guide,
people, of course,

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lived in this area a lot
earlier than that

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but they don't know when people
first moved

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into this area

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So, I guess this is a traditional market

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in the village, here.

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There's so many fruits and
vegetables everywhere around me

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and there's clothes there

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and a person at the entrance

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and he's wailing about something,
I don't know.

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The fish are still alive

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I don't know what kind of fish
that is

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which I just showed you

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because I've seen it everywhere
in the lakes here

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it's some type of mix between a fish
and an eel

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There's so many chicks here

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I hope they don't plan to eat them

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I just asked that Vietnamese woman

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if they will eat the chicks

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and, of course, she didn't
understand me

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but ... she didn't understand my words

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but she understood my gestures, this

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and she nodded enthusiastically
like this

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Ha, my wife has found hats again

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Do you want to buy a hat?

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They're now bargaining the price

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They has chillis

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that's bad; I need to run

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Say hello!

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Hello!

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How are you?

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How are you!

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How are you?

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She just made a complete sentence
in Esperanto!

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My wife is now behind me
and she's bargaining for new shoes

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She already has enough shoes

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She doesn't need more!

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You are so cute!

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Come here!

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Come to daddy

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I want to eat you!

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No, I don't want to do that

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My father-in-law just pointed
our this

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the bridge has small pieces
of glass

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which is made from bottles

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even pieces of cups

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for example, this and this

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this entire side is almost
made our of cups

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and this is made from glass

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I just wanted to show you
this boat

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because it looks interesting

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and it has a real
Vietnamese look to it

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So, this village here is so small

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that we can pass the entire town
on foot

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within about five minutes

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and around it everywhere are
rice fields

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You can see there and there -
just everywhere

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So, we're now on the beach

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According to my Vietnamese guide

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this beach is the most famous
in Vietnam

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but compared to Australia,
it is nothing!

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However, I need to be honest

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it is bloody long

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you can't even see the end of it

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and it's strangely quite clean

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that is rare here

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Usually, on the sides of roads
and around everywhere

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there's rubbish, but here, on the beach
there isn't

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I like how the mountains look

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You don't need an umbrella

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It's not that bright

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I'm happy that today it's cloudy
enough

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that the sun isn't burning my head

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my balding head because that
would be terrible

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if I suddenly got cancer,
while in Vietnam, right?

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But really, I'd love to swim

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but I don't have the right clothes
today

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and as soon as I said that
there's enough clouds out

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the sun appear as if it wanted to say

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f**k you, Evildea!

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So, I just purchased icecream

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because it's gotten
hot enough

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Oh, f**k me

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I didn't even know where I was walking

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Check this out

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I really like how the trees are
scattered and just sitting there

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they are really interesting

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I wonder what kind of tree this is

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And now I'm going to the third location

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So, we just arrived at the third location

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We are now on the top of
some mountain here

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So, that's where we're going

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I need to be careful here

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I don't want some car to run over me

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Our guide says this tower
was built

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by the American army during
the Vietnam war

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So, this part of Vietnam is
very interesting

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because there's many old
buildings

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buildings that were made
by the Vietnamese emperors

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buildings by the French empire

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or the French government

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and also this building

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which was made by the US army

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So, it's just an interesting and
strange mix

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of different buildings from around
the world

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Somewhere there is a building
that looks like a US building

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maybe that's a location where
people placed a gun

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so you can see your enemies

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come from there, you then of
course could shoot them

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I really want to find the entrance

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It seems it's there

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Oh shit, I doubt I can
enter there

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Oh shit

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Can you see anything?

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I can only see the screen of
my camera

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So, I hope it's interesting
for you

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I couldn't find a door at all

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So, I intend to climb on the
roof now

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and hopefully I can enter
it through the roof

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as I can see a small hole there

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but I don't know how big it is

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Ah shit, it's not a hole!

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So, having seen everything,
we're now going to the 4th location

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or the 5th ... I've forgotten

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Very soon we will go
up that big mountain

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In fact, maybe you can see it

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there it is

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but before we go there,
we need to use the toilet

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So, while waiting for my wife

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because she's in the toilet

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I just wanted to check out
this statues here

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because they're really delicate

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Look at them

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This lion looks as if someone just

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shoved a stick in his bum

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Look at those eyes

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What do you want?

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Do you want me to put my
finger in your nose?

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Yes, I can do that

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Look at what you can do

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This is wonderful

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The water is pushing it enough

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that this just sits there

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as if there isn't gravity

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Look

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and then, you can stop it

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and move it in the other direction

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That's really cool, right?

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So, we just arrived at the
last location of our tour

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We need to buy tickets now

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So, the wife and family are doing that

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and then, we can start to climb
the mountain

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Someone carved the walls
in this cave

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There's statues and they're
just a part of the walls themselves

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Welcome to the cave of
Bat man

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Look at the light

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Oh, it's so mysterious

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My wife is now praying to
the scared Budda

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as she wants to give birth
to a son

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the strongest, most beautiful,
coolest son ever

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Here's what happens when you speak
a language other than Esperanto

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This part of the cave is called

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the Gate to Hell

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Evildea, don't enter the light!