WEBVTT

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(Bass guitar)

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(Bass guitar and accordion)

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♫ You're older than you've ever been ♫

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♫ and now you're even older ♫

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♫ and now you're even older ♫

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♫ and now you're even older. ♫

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♫ You're older than you've even been ♫

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♫ and now you're even older ♫

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♫ and now you're older still. ♫

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♫ Time ♫

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♫ is marching on ♫

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♫ and time ♫

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♫ is still marching on. ♫

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♫ This day will soon be at an end ♫

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♫ and now it's even sooner ♫

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♫ and now it's even sooner ♫

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♫ and now it's even sooner. ♫

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♫ This day will soon be at an end ♫

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♫ and now it's even sooner ♫

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♫ and now it's sooner still. ♫

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♫ You're older than you've ever been ♫

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♫ and now you're even older ♫

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♫ and now you're even older ♫

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♫ and now you're even older. ♫

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♫ You're older than you've ever been ♫

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♫ and now you're even older ♫

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♫ and now you're older still. ♫

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Thank you very much.

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Good morning everybody.

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We are They Might Be Giants.

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(Applause)

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I am wearing the Al Gore in-ear monitors

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he wore on the Larry King show

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and I'm hearing that transmission and not mine.

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But I guess that's in keeping,

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so now we'll just move to the PowerPoint presentation,

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ladies and gentlemen.

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This is a brand new song.

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In the spirit of TED, we're bringing you something

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that has not been released.

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John, do you want to introduce the song?

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This is a song about a creature called a hummingbird moth

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which imitates another creature

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which imitates yet another creature.

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It's completely fucked up

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and can only be explained in song.

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♫ Everyone is crying at the dread hypnotic flying ♫

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♫ of the bee of the bird of the moth. ♫

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♫ You can't walk, you can't ramble ♫

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♫ 'cause you're gonna have to scramble ♫

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♫ from the bee of the bird of the moth. ♫

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♫ Catbird is a cat ♫

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♫ but he's got bugness in his veins. ♫

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♫ Manhouse lives within himself ♫

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♫ with thoughtful human brains. ♫

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♫ Neither one is equal 
♫

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♫ to the challenge of the freak we'll call ♫

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♫ the bee of the bird of the moth. ♫

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♫ Now the moth ♫

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♫ defeats the mouse and man. ♫

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♫ It's messing with the plan. ♫

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♫ It can't be believed ♫

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♫ 'cause it's just a hummingbird moth ♫

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♫ who's acting like the bird ♫

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♫ that thinks it's a bee. ♫

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♫ Got a brand new shipment ♫

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♫ of electrical equipment ♫

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♫ it's addressed to the bottom of the sea. ♫

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♫ Send a tangerine-colored ♫

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♫ nuclear submarine ♫

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♫ with a sticker that says STP. ♫

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♫ Windshield wiper washer fluid ♫

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♫ spraying in the air ... ♫

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♫ headlights under head lice ♫

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♫ under hats lie everywhere. ♫

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♫ Subatomic waves ♫

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♫ to the underwater caves ♫

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♫ of the bee of the bird of the moth. ♫

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♫ Now the moth defeats the mouse and man. ♫

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♫ It's messing with the plan. ♫

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♫ It can't be believed ♫

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♫ 'cause it's just a hummingbird moth ♫

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♫ who's acting like a bird ♫

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♫ that thinks it's a bee. ♫

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♫ Is it us or is this messed up? ♫

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♫ Everyone's deforming ♫

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♫ in the presence of the swarming ♫

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♫ of the bee of the bird of the moth. ♫

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♫ Protozoa, snakes and horses ♫

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♫ have enlisted in the forces ♫

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♫ of the bee of bird of the moth. ♫

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♫ Catbug is a cat ♫

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♫ but he's got bugness in his veins. ♫

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♫ Manhouse lives within himself ♫

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♫ with thoughtful human brains. ♫

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♫ Neither one is equal ♫

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♫ to the challenge of the freak we'll call ♫

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♫ the bee of the bird of the moth. ♫

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(Applause)

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Thanks a lot.

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Thank you very much.

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So we are past our 1,000th show.

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Probably somewhere around 1,500.

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It's hard to know.

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We've only done two shows in 2007 so far,

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but our first show

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was actually the coldest performance we've ever had.

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It was 19 degrees in St. Louis about a month ago

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and I'm happy to report

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that this performance you are seeing today

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is the earliest we have ever performed.

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So thank you.

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We are cultural test pilots, ladies and gentlemen.

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How early can a rock performance begin?

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Not all the facts are in about performing

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at 8.30 in the morning.

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I can tell you the 19 degree thing

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was fantastic.

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All right.

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So we don't know that much

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about the history of violinists

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but we do know that when we entered

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the state of New Jersey

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there is an uptick in violence.

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This song is called "Asbury Park."

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It's based on a real life experience.

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♫ I ♫

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♫ I got ♫

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♫ I got kicked ♫

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♫ I got kicked in the head ♫

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♫ backstage at the Stone. ♫

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♫ Stone Pone. ♫

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♫ Stone Pony. ♫

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♫ I got kicked in the head ♫

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♫ backstage at the Stone Pony ♫

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♫ where I swore to the guy ♫

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♫ that the guy who took his beer wasn't me. ♫

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♫ Me got ♫

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♫ Me got kicked ♫

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♫ Me got kicked in the head ♫

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♫ backstage at the Stone. ♫

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♫ Stone Pone. ♫

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♫ Stone Pony. ♫

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♫ Me got kicked in the head ♫

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♫ backstage at the Stone Pony ♫

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♫ where I swore to the guy ♫

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♫ that the guy who took his beer ♫

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♫ was a guy dressed like me. ♫

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♫ Not me! ♫

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♫ Not me! ♫

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♫ Not me! ♫

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Thank you.

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Marty Beller on the drums over there.

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(Applause)

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We want to get in as many songs as possible

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during our brief time here

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so this is the one to play.

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This song is called "Fingertips."

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♫ Everything is catching on fire ♫

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♫ Yes, everything is catching on fire ♫

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♫ Yes, everything is catching on fire. ♫

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♫ Fingertips ♫

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♫ Fingertips ♫

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♫ Fingertips ♫

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♫ I hear the wind blow ♫

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♫ I hear the wind blow ♫

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♫ It seems to say ♫

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♫ Hello ♫

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♫ Hello ♫

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♫ I'm the one who loves you so. ♫

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♫ Hey, now everybody, now. ♫

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♫ Hey, now everybody ♫

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♫ Hey, now everybody, now ♫

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♫ Who's that standing ♫

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♫ at the window?♫

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♫ I found a new friend ♫

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♫ underneath my pillow. ♫

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♫ Come on and wreck my car ♫

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♫ Come on and wreck my car ♫

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♫ Come on and wreck my car ♫

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♫ Come on and wreck my car ♫

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♫ Aren't you the guy who hit me in the eye? ♫

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♫ Aren't you the guy who hit me in the eye? ♫

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♫ Please pass the milk, please. ♫

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♫ Please pass the milk, please. ♫

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♫ Please pass the milk, please. ♫

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♫ Leave me alone, leave me alone. ♫

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♫ Who's knocking on the wall? ♫

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♫ All alone, all alone. ♫

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♫ All by myself. ♫

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♫ What's that blue thing doing here? ♫

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♫ Something grabbed ahold of my hand ♫

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♫ I didn't know what had my hand ♫

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♫ but that's when all my troubles began. ♫

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♫ I don't understand you ♫

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♫ I don't understand you ♫

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♫ I cannot understand you ♫

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♫ I cannot understand you ♫

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♫ I don't understand the things you say ♫

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♫ I can't understand a single word ♫

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♫ I don't understand you ♫

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♫ I don't understand you ♫

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♫ I just don't understand you ♫

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♫ I don't understand you ♫

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♫ I do not understand you ♫

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♫ Don't understand you ♫

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♫ Don't understand you ♫

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♫ I turn around ♫

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♫ See the sound ♫

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♫ Turn around and see the thing ♫

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♫ that made the sound. ♫

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♫ Mysterious whisper ♫

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♫ Mysterious whisper ♫

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♫ Mysterious whisper ♫

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♫ Mysterious whisper ♫

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♫ The day that love came to play. ♫

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♫ I'm having a heart attack ♫

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♫ I'm having a heart attack ♫

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♫ I'm having a heart attack ♫

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♫ I'm having a ... ♫

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♫ Fingertips ♫

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♫ Fingertips ♫

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♫ I walk along darkened corridors ♫

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♫ And I walk along darkened corridors ♫

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Thank you very much -- "Fingertips."

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(Applause)

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♫ We're taking calls -- from the dead. ♫

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♫ We're taking calls -- from the dead. ♫

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♫ We're taking phone calls from the dead. ♫

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♫ They're calling from beyond the grave. ♫

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♫ Beyond the grave. ♫

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♫ They have some questions ♫

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♫ And things to share ♫

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♫ From underneath the cold, cold ground. ♫

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We're soliciting phone calls from dead people

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as a special TED presentation.

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We're taking calls live on stage

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here at TED in Monterey.

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And I think we have a caller coming in here.

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Hello there.

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You're live.

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Hello. Who's there, please?

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Am I on the air?

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Hi there.

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You're on with They Might Be Giants.

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This is Eleanor Roosevelt.

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Hello, Eleanor, please ...

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I want to talk to ...

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Please turn off your radio, Eleanor.

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I wanna talk to Randi.

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I've got a question for Randi.

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What's your question, please?

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I want to talk to the Amazing Randi.

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Do you have a laminated badge, Eleanor?

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I want my million dollars.

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Eleanor, I'm sorry,

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do you have a laminated badge?

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No, I don't have a badge.

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Well, I think we're going to stop

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that part of the show.

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Here's a song we like to think of

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as the future anthem of TED.

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It's actually a children's song

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but like so many projects for children

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it's really just a Trojan horse

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for adult work.

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This song is called

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"The Alphabet ...

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Of Nations!"

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♫ Algeria, Bulgaria, Cambodia, Dominica, ♫

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♫ Egypt, France, The Gambia ♫

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♫ Hungary, Iran, Japan, Kazakhstan, ♫

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♫ Libya and Mongolia. ♫

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♫ Norway, Oman, Pakistan, ♫

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♫ Qatar, Russia, Suriname, ♫

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♫ Turkey, Uruguay, Vietnam, ♫

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♫ West Xylophone, Yemen, Zimbabwe. ♫

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♫ Algeria, Bulgaria, Cambodia, Dominica, ♫

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♫ Egypt, France, The Gambia, ♫

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♫ Hungary, Iran, Japan, Kazakhstan, ♫

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♫ Libya and Mongolia. ♫

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♫ Norway, Oman, Pakistan, ♫

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♫ Qatar, Russia, Suriname, ♫

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♫ Turkey, Uruguay, Vietnam, ♫

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♫ West Xylophone, Yemen, Zimbabwe. ♫

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♫ Azerbaijan, Bolivia, Canada, ♫

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♫ Australia, Belgium, Chad, ♫

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♫ Afghanistan, Brunei, China, Denmark, ♫

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♫ Ecuador, Fiji, Guatemala, ♫

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♫ Algeria, Bulgaria, Cambodia, Dominica, ♫

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♫ Egypt, France, The Gambia, ♫

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♫ Hungary, Iran, Japan, Kazakhstan, ♫

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♫ Libya and Mongolia. ♫

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♫ Norway, Oman, Pakistan, ♫

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♫ Qatar, Russia, Suriname, ♫

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♫ Turkey, Uruguay, Vietnam, ♫

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♫ West Xylophone, Yemen, Zimbabwe. ♫

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Thank you so much.

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You've been a wonderful 8:30 audience.

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Have a great session.

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Thank you all.