0:00:06.479,0:00:09.069
[gong]
0:00:11.298,0:00:16.628
[gong]
0:00:42.233,0:00:47.763
[gong]
0:01:01.073,0:01:02.073
[gong]
0:01:39.523,0:01:44.353
Dear respected Thay, [br]dear sisters and brothers
0:01:46.434,0:01:50.412
welcome to the Q&A session [br]of the third week of summer retreat
0:01:53.157,0:01:57.453
I feel very honored to be here [br]with my big brother and sisters.
0:02:00.384,0:02:04.147
On the panel today [br]we have Thay Phap Dung,
0:02:06.511,0:02:09.164
he is born in Vietnam
0:02:09.574,0:02:13.536
but he studied in the United States [br]to become an architect.
0:02:14.914,0:02:18.011
He's one of our elder brothers[br]here in Plum Village
0:02:19.959,0:02:29.204
Sister Lang Nghiem is also born in Vietnam[br]but studied in the United States,
0:02:31.432,0:02:35.585
and sister Lan Nghiem [br]is coming from Holland
0:02:36.513,0:02:38.854
she spent much of her [br]adult life in France,
0:02:40.327,0:02:41.738
and I'm brother Phap Luu,
0:02:41.949,0:02:47.739
I come from the United States and [br]I live here for maybe, 15 years.
0:02:51.311,0:02:56.719
So we have a chance for you, [br]the children, the teens, the parents,
0:02:56.719,0:02:59.205
to come up here [br]and ask the question of your heart.
0:03:01.594,0:03:04.433
We know that when we look [br]deeply into ourselves
0:03:04.433,0:03:10.786
and we see that something's [br]burning inside, some questions,
0:03:11.670,0:03:15.216
something we need the community [br]and our brothers and sisters to look into,
0:03:16.271,0:03:23.309
then we can stand up and come up here [br]and ask that question of our heart.
0:03:27.694,0:03:31.930
It's not an intellectual question, [br]something we can look up on Wikipedia,
0:03:33.383,0:03:36.486
but something that is really [br]about our daily life
0:03:37.292,0:03:41.206
and the suffering and happiness [br]of our practice.
0:03:44.368,0:03:46.966
And a good question [br]doesn't have to be long.
0:03:53.303,0:03:55.309
So we'll start with the children
0:03:55.803,0:03:58.997
and then invite some questions [br]from the teens and the young people
0:04:00.734,0:04:03.231
and then from the adults.
0:04:03.651,0:04:06.696
And if you feel a little bit shy [br]to come up here,
0:04:06.696,0:04:09.698
then you can write down [br]your question on a piece of paper
0:04:09.942,0:04:14.347
and try to get it to the Bell master [br]and he will bring it to us.
0:04:14.347,0:04:18.347
So we might take[br]some written questions as well.
0:04:21.182,0:04:22.773
So we'll start with the children,
0:04:22.773,0:04:24.989
are there any questions from the children?
0:04:26.150,0:04:28.040
Yes? You want to come up here?
0:04:28.939,0:04:32.637
We'll take maybe three or maximum [br]four questions from the children.
0:04:34.146,0:04:35.175
Please come up.
0:04:36.260,0:04:41.280
If you speak English, or French,
0:04:42.231,0:04:45.618
you can ask your question in that [br]language, and we'll try to translate
0:04:45.627,0:04:48.026
and if you ask your question[br]in another language
0:04:48.026,0:04:51.238
if you can bring a translator with you, [br]that would be very helpful.
0:04:52.857,0:04:55.339
so we can listen to a sound of the Bell,
0:04:55.339,0:04:58.578
come back to our breathing [br]and then we'll have our first question
0:05:11.824,0:05:15.916
[gong]
0:05:52.200,0:05:59.626
Lieve broeders en zusters, [br]mijn vraag is: Wat betekent niets?
0:06:00.338,0:06:01.720
Wat is niks?
0:06:04.935,0:06:09.403
[translation by a person in the room]
0:06:16.466,0:06:19.363
So I'll just repeat the question [br]so that everyone can hear.
0:06:20.974,0:06:23.226
She asked the question:
0:06:23.611,0:06:26.184
Dear brothers and sisters, [br]what is nothing?
0:06:27.341,0:06:29.627
What does nothing mean?
0:06:46.867,0:06:48.265
I invite Thay Phap Dung,
0:06:52.285,0:06:55.662
I think Thay Phap Dung is very good [br]about talking about nothing.
0:07:02.260,0:07:05.271
I don't know what happened this summer
0:07:05.431,0:07:09.341
but more and more children [br]are becoming philosophical.
0:07:12.114,0:07:15.096
I see my brothers and sister [br]last two weeks up here,
0:07:17.430,0:07:19.715
meeting young philosophers
0:07:25.270,0:07:31.422
We use our language, like the word [br]'nothing', to describe many things, right?
0:07:35.623,0:07:40.700
When we practice, we learn to look deeply [br]and not get caught in the word 'nothing'.
0:07:42.602,0:07:44.309
Sometimes we use the word 'nothing'
0:07:44.745,0:07:49.393
to describe when something [br]is not seen anymore,
0:07:51.692,0:07:52.815
the food on your plate,
0:07:52.996,0:07:56.375
you finish eating,[br]you eat everything on your plate
0:07:57.704,0:08:02.236
and then you say [br]there's nothing on the plate, right?
0:08:03.437,0:08:07.831
So we use the word 'nothing' [br]to describe when we don't see something.
0:08:14.516,0:08:22.397
Sometimes we have a cup, right?
0:08:22.902,0:08:24.955
You say, there's tea in that cup
0:08:26.751,0:08:33.305
and there's nothing in the cup, right,
0:08:37.281,0:08:39.155
but is there something else in the cup?
0:08:43.229,0:08:45.332
Air, right!
0:08:46.852,0:08:51.207
So you can say there's nothing, [br]but then you can say there is something,
0:08:52.444,0:08:53.304
right?
0:08:54.494,0:08:58.158
So we have to be very careful [br]when we use a word,
0:08:59.202,0:09:00.139
nothing,
0:09:00.638,0:09:02.380
and don't let it stop you
0:09:02.516,0:09:07.365
from questioning the meaning [br]of the word, you understand?
0:09:09.091,0:09:12.929
I believe your question is very, [br]you want to understand
0:09:13.044,0:09:17.125
and please continue [br]to ask that question, okay?
0:09:21.070,0:09:25.390
Well your plate is empty [br]and you say there's nothing on the plate,
0:09:27.585,0:09:29.120
and where did it go?
0:09:30.137,0:09:33.466
That something, the food.
0:09:36.366,0:09:38.739
Right, so the food comes [br]into your stomach,
0:09:39.551,0:09:42.529
it goes, and it doesn't become nothing.
0:09:44.309,0:09:48.517
So nothing and something [br]have a relationship, right?
0:09:48.692,0:09:51.975
Like, there's nothing, [br]but there's also something.
0:09:53.449,0:09:55.328
So when you ask, there is nothing
0:09:55.524,0:09:59.771
you have to ask,[br]what is it, that is nothing of.
0:10:02.161,0:10:05.394
So it doesn't really disappear [br]but maybe we don't see it,
0:10:10.033,0:10:11.256
you understand?
0:10:11.812,0:10:17.953
So when you ask, what is nothing?
0:10:18.755,0:10:23.591
then you have to also be open [br]to say, what is something?
0:10:27.497,0:10:28.808
Do you understand?
0:10:29.673,0:10:30.741
A little bit yeah!
0:10:34.393,0:10:37.561
I'm just basically sharing with you...
0:10:37.958,0:10:41.549
Don't just take the definition of nothing,
0:10:42.395,0:10:49.238
because in the dictionary they probably [br]say, nothing is when the...
0:10:50.439,0:10:52.018
What does it mean anyway?
0:10:54.177,0:10:58.559
When something is [br]the opposite of something,
0:10:59.694,0:11:06.038
but sometimes you need to look [br]more carefully so you don't get tricked.
0:11:07.178,0:11:11.115
It's kind of like hide and seek, right?
0:11:11.985,0:11:15.794
When you say something disappears,[br]you have to go where did it go?
0:11:18.309,0:11:23.091
It doesn't become nothing [br]but maybe becomes something else,
0:11:24.270,0:11:26.762
like when you see the cloud up in the sky,
0:11:30.030,0:11:33.300
did you ever see a cloud disappear?
0:11:34.603,0:11:37.408
If you sit in the right place,[br]somewhere over a hill
0:11:37.572,0:11:39.022
you see the cloud go.
0:11:40.939,0:11:42.237
It appeared,
0:11:42.237,0:11:45.697
and then you wait for a while[br]and you look somewhere else,
0:11:45.697,0:11:48.317
and when you look up, [br]and then the cloud disappeared.
0:11:49.549,0:11:51.497
And you say, there's nothing there now,
0:11:53.599,0:11:56.212
but if you look closely, [br]the cloud is still there.
0:12:03.735,0:12:13.485
So please remember to not be caught [br]when there is no cloud, okay?
0:12:13.675,0:12:17.244
You can also look and see, [br]where did the cloud go?
0:12:17.495,0:12:19.443
Did it become the moisture?
0:12:19.837,0:12:21.441
Sometimes it becomes the rain
0:12:23.235,0:12:26.365
and sometimes, like right now, [br]do you think there's a cloud here?
0:12:27.919,0:12:32.708
There's nothing here, [br]but I think if I keep doing this enough
0:12:36.930,0:12:39.387
and you can see a very light cloud
0:12:43.142,0:12:43.900
I try
0:12:46.148,0:12:49.550
but you see that some time [br]in a chemistry class or something,
0:12:49.550,0:12:51.193
you do certain things
0:12:51.977,0:12:54.901
and it makes the temperature change [br]and the moisture happen
0:12:55.765,0:12:57.268
like when you take a shower,
0:12:57.443,0:12:59.805
sometimes you see the mist come up
0:13:01.294,0:13:04.709
please know that sometimes,[br]just because you don't see it there,
0:13:05.159,0:13:07.929
doesn't mean there's nothing there, okay?
0:13:08.752,0:13:10.111
thank you for your question
0:13:12.291,0:13:17.113
and please continue [br]to ask your other friends
0:13:18.502,0:13:20.664
maybe they have a very interesting answer
0:13:21.944,0:13:22.702
thank you
0:13:26.001,0:13:26.862
thank you
0:13:29.982,0:13:31.249
[gong]
0:13:34.564,0:13:38.495
[gong]
0:13:57.336,0:14:00.761
why can't you cook fish in Plum Village?
0:14:11.089,0:14:15.782
So the question is, [br]why can't we cook fish in Plum Village?
0:14:18.685,0:14:22.271
Why can't we cook fish in Plum Village?
0:14:55.258,0:15:00.361
I think it's because we enjoy the fish [br]alive and swimming in the pond
0:15:00.361,0:15:03.814
more, than we do seeing the fish in a pan
0:15:05.408,0:15:09.018
and it's not that we cannot
0:15:10.298,0:15:11.573
it's that we don't want to
0:15:13.795,0:15:15.507
we choose not to cook the fish
0:15:20.686,0:15:25.067
and here we choose to eat [br]what we call vegetarian
0:15:25.440,0:15:27.407
Do you know what vegetarian means?
0:15:32.894,0:15:36.963
It's just we don't eat meat,[br]we don't eat fish,
0:15:38.981,0:15:40.440
we try to eat in such a way
0:15:41.141,0:15:48.030
that we minimize the suffering that we [br]cause to animals, plants and minerals
0:15:48.344,0:15:49.654
and even to people
0:15:50.522,0:15:54.848
and that's why [br]when we are here in Plum Village
0:15:54.992,0:15:56.547
we choose not to cook the fish
0:15:56.959,0:16:02.847
because we also want to prevent the fish [br]from suffering a little bit
0:16:03.768,0:16:06.819
can you imagine if someone [br]put you in a pan and cooked you?
0:16:10.506,0:16:12.961
Yeah not very nice right?
0:16:14.132,0:16:16.763
So that's why we choose [br]not to cook the fish.
0:16:17.053,0:16:18.532
yeah, thank you
0:16:20.629,0:16:24.759
[gong]
0:16:34.937,0:16:39.888
pourquoi les moines et les nonnes [br]ne peuvent pas avoir d'amoureux?
0:16:41.893,0:16:43.397
Yes, so the question is,
0:16:43.972,0:16:48.748
why can't monks and nuns [br]be in love with somebody
0:16:49.344,0:16:52.240
or be in love with each other [br]or another person?
0:16:55.629,0:16:56.742
Have a lover, okay.
0:17:02.989,0:17:04.859
Thank you brother Dickian
0:17:10.895,0:17:15.258
So why can't monks and nuns have lovers?
0:17:18.583,0:17:20.392
I think this is for Sister Lan Nghiem.
0:17:35.410,0:17:37.889
Dear Thay, dear sangha, [br]dear children,
0:17:39.293,0:17:43.088
I'm always very happy to listen [br]to the questions of children
0:17:43.539,0:17:46.324
but now to answer, [br]that is something different
0:17:48.616,0:17:51.138
and I do like the question and
0:17:51.707,0:17:55.696
because I think it's not completely true [br]that we cannot have a lover
0:17:56.239,0:18:03.711
I remember a long time ago,[br]I shared something about in a presentation
0:18:03.937,0:18:06.240
that I shared that I had a secret lover
0:18:07.256,0:18:10.814
and it was not really a man [br]but it was a sister
0:18:11.644,0:18:12.932
and it was a sister.
0:18:13.488,0:18:18.525
One day I was a little bit upset [br]things were not going well
0:18:19.800,0:18:24.583
and I was upset and you know,[br]I didn't want to talk to anybody
0:18:25.434,0:18:27.215
and then I came in the study room
0:18:27.755,0:18:31.171
and then I found [br]a beautiful flower on my desk
0:18:32.262,0:18:33.200
beautiful
0:18:33.835,0:18:36.194
kaarsjeskruid in het Nederlands
0:18:39.252,0:18:41.351
and I was so happy to see this flower
0:18:41.894,0:18:44.960
and it changed immediately my whole mood
0:18:45.863,0:18:47.975
because somebody had thought about me
0:18:48.367,0:18:51.283
and knew that I was in a difficult mood
0:18:51.593,0:18:54.359
and that it was not going well and so on
0:18:54.891,0:18:57.154
and she put there a flower on my desk
0:18:57.379,0:19:02.247
so in this presentation I spoke about, [br]I do have a secret lover
0:19:02.411,0:19:03.932
and that was this sister
0:19:04.536,0:19:06.344
and a secret lover that is somebody,
0:19:09.965,0:19:14.651
somebody who understands you[br]and keeps an eye on you
0:19:15.122,0:19:17.414
and if you see that you are not doing well
0:19:17.414,0:19:19.783
then she is going [br]to support you a little bit
0:19:20.486,0:19:23.303
for example by putting [br]a flower on your desk
0:19:27.892,0:19:29.234
so this is about the sister
0:19:29.489,0:19:33.822
and the second part of the question
0:19:36.555,0:19:38.519
why can monistics not have a lover?
0:19:39.315,0:19:44.988
I think it is because we have chosen [br]to spend our time in a different way
0:19:46.240,0:19:47.297
it's all about that
0:19:49.052,0:19:52.156
we like to be a monastic [br]we really like to practice
0:19:53.323,0:19:55.496
we like to share the practice [br]with everybody
0:19:56.226,0:20:02.026
and maybe as you have seen, [br]it's a lot of work here it's quite busy
0:20:02.409,0:20:04.942
we have many big retreats during the year
0:20:05.863,0:20:09.193
now like the summer retreat,[br]many people, a lot of work
0:20:10.598,0:20:14.510
so we have chosen [br]to spend our time in a different way
0:20:15.026,0:20:16.839
and to share the practice with you
0:20:18.547,0:20:24.453
and imagine if I had [br]this other kind of lover, a romantic lover
0:20:25.242,0:20:28.405
then I would not have so much time
0:20:28.763,0:20:32.633
then I would have to share my time [br]with this man and with the Sangha
0:20:33.469,0:20:36.426
so it's not so much time [br]that I could be here
0:20:36.681,0:20:39.049
and taking care [br]of all the friends and so on
0:20:41.074,0:20:44.126
so it's about this, it's a choice in life [br]that we have to make
0:20:44.933,0:20:48.578
and I have quite some peace with it
0:20:49.725,0:20:50.877
thank you
0:20:53.226,0:21:00.386
[gong]
0:21:30.441,0:21:35.016
Warum ist mein Leben eigentlich [br]immer schwerer als das von den Anderen?
0:21:48.224,0:21:51.653
So please correct me if I'm wrong, [br]the question is,
0:21:51.854,0:21:58.172
why is my life always more difficult [br]than the lives of others?
0:22:00.987,0:22:03.293
so first, thank you for your question,
0:22:05.601,0:22:07.589
and thank you on behalf of everybody here
0:22:08.503,0:22:13.965
because when you ask a question like that [br]then we all bring it into our heart
0:22:17.459,0:22:24.310
and I think we all have gone [br]through times in our lives
0:22:24.502,0:22:26.892
where we feel [br]our life is so much more difficult
0:22:28.011,0:22:29.618
than the lives of other people
0:22:31.210,0:22:33.324
is there anyone who has never felt that?
0:22:41.550,0:22:44.007
ok, there's one person [br]who's never felt that
0:22:54.859,0:23:00.610
and for myself sometimes I feel [br]I'm not good enough
0:23:04.164,0:23:06.894
I feel I'm not smart enough
0:23:10.486,0:23:16.925
I feel like I'm only average [br]or maybe a little bit below average
0:23:18.569,0:23:21.615
can you imagine, [br]as a monk you feel like that?
0:23:23.300,0:23:25.039
but it's true yeah
0:23:29.843,0:23:34.808
and then I think in my heart, [br]it's not fair
0:23:39.343,0:23:40.736
because look at the kid
0:23:41.072,0:23:43.259
look at him, look at her, [br]they are so talented
0:23:44.280,0:23:48.669
they're so intelligent, [br]they speak so beautifully, they speak so..
0:23:49.387,0:23:52.247
they're so kind and compassionate, [br]I'm very selfish
0:23:53.449,0:23:56.218
sometimes I have that kind of thinking [br]even as a monk
0:23:57.124,0:23:58.178
do you believe me?
0:24:01.941,0:24:03.840
yeah it's true
0:24:08.950,0:24:15.362
and so, then I wish, you know, why? [br]I wish to know why is it like that?
0:24:27.888,0:24:29.358
why is my life so difficult?
0:24:32.607,0:24:37.794
when I was young in middle school
0:24:38.866,0:24:40.826
I was about eleven, twelve years old
0:24:43.424,0:24:47.304
and there was a boy and he was a
0:24:47.304,0:24:49.177
when I would walk down the hallway
0:24:49.544,0:24:51.424
one day he punched me in the shoulder.
0:24:54.005,0:24:57.464
I didn't see him, he's punching,[br]ow, it's very painful.
0:24:59.478,0:25:03.091
and then a couple days later, [br]he did it again
0:25:05.820,0:25:08.498
and then I started [br]to have fear to see that boy
0:25:10.144,0:25:14.610
if I was walking in the hallway [br]and I saw that fear
0:25:14.918,0:25:18.857
I started to arrange my life [br]so I could avoid that boy
0:25:24.318,0:25:27.706
and so I suffered very much [br]and I said why is my life so difficult?
0:25:28.321,0:25:29.227
why can't I be...
0:25:29.794,0:25:31.887
at that time many of the boys they grew
0:25:31.887,0:25:34.292
I was very young for my grade
0:25:35.181,0:25:38.689
so many of the boys they grew up[br]very tall and I was still very small
0:25:42.663,0:25:48.535
and so I suffered for many weeks like that
0:25:49.317,0:25:53.359
in fear that I would see that boy and [br]he would punch me in the shoulder again
0:26:03.863,0:26:08.990
and all I wanted was [br]to be big and strong like the other boys
0:26:10.873,0:26:15.895
and be really cool and [br]talk with all the really cool girls
0:26:18.552,0:26:19.299
yeah?
0:26:20.240,0:26:24.698
Have you ever felt something like that? [br]No,
0:26:25.513,0:26:26.747
okay yeah you
0:26:27.041,0:26:27.858
maybe you want
0:26:29.843,0:26:31.655
well anyway, I felt like that
0:26:39.524,0:26:44.616
and then, because I continued like that [br]for a little while
0:26:45.192,0:26:49.278
then eventually [br]we sat with somebody in the school
0:26:50.513,0:26:52.383
and we tried to have a communication
0:26:56.006,0:26:58.124
and you know what I found out?
0:27:00.698,0:27:02.346
he didn't like my haircut
0:27:06.773,0:27:08.026
can you believe that?
0:27:09.026,0:27:14.790
he didn't like my haircut [br]and he thought I was trying to be cool
0:27:16.665,0:27:18.222
maybe I was trying to be cool
0:27:20.086,0:27:21.841
and sometimes the boys are like that
0:27:21.841,0:27:24.740
they want to put each other[br]in their place, you know?
0:27:24.740,0:27:27.528
like, you are not cool, [br]you have to stay in your place
0:27:28.245,0:27:29.032
I am cool
0:27:29.798,0:27:31.284
anyway something like that
0:27:33.512,0:27:36.158
and now when I look back at that, [br]it looks very silly
0:27:38.278,0:27:43.017
but at the time when I was that age [br]it was very real for me everyday
0:27:44.278,0:27:45.930
and I felt my life is so difficult
0:27:45.939,0:27:47.698
and I said where did my happiness go
0:27:49.163,0:27:52.736
I was a very happy boy and then [br]suddenly my happiness disappeared
0:27:53.732,0:27:54.563
because of
0:27:55.020,0:27:57.697
not because of that boy, [br]but because of my fear
0:27:58.064,0:27:59.409
I let my fear take over
0:28:02.299,0:28:03.716
what he did was very little
0:28:04.912,0:28:08.699
but what happened inside of me [br]was very big, the emotion
0:28:11.412,0:28:13.265
and that is true most of our life
0:28:14.317,0:28:19.479
we have a strong emotion and we think [br]it's because of something out there
0:28:20.614,0:28:22.390
but actually it's something in here
0:28:23.283,0:28:26.011
maybe there's something inside [br]we're not taking care of
0:28:28.199,0:28:30.433
so that's why here in Plum Village, [br]we learn..
0:28:31.268,0:28:32.910
I love to work with the children
0:28:33.776,0:28:35.815
to teach them how to breathe mindfully
0:28:36.909,0:28:41.250
you know, breathing in, breathing out
0:28:41.250,0:28:42.833
Do you know? We sing that song
0:28:43.447,0:28:46.921
and even when the kids are very noisy, [br]when we start singing that song
0:28:46.924,0:28:51.135
after a few bars, they calm down [br]and they all start singing it
0:28:52.016,0:28:54.410
and I feel so at peace at my heart
0:28:54.652,0:28:57.544
because when I was that age [br]I didn't have that practice
0:28:58.128,0:29:02.263
I didn't have anyone who taught me [br]how to come back to my breathing
0:29:02.534,0:29:04.359
and be solid like a mountain
0:29:05.013,0:29:07.609
I didn't feel I could be solid [br]like a mountain
0:29:08.940,0:29:11.235
I just compared myself to other people
0:29:12.141,0:29:18.946
and I saw Who am I?, [br]based on what I saw about the other kids.
0:29:21.895,0:29:26.223
and so that's what here in Plum Village [br]we learned you know
0:29:26.223,0:29:27.586
we are solid like a mountain
0:29:27.586,0:29:30.399
the mountain doesn't compare itself [br]to the other mountains
0:29:32.823,0:29:34.102
you understand?
0:29:34.604,0:29:35.726
the mountain is solid,
0:29:35.726,0:29:38.862
it doesn't say, why is that mountain [br]more beautiful over there?
0:29:40.866,0:29:44.498
you know, there's a mountain, [br]Mont Blanc, in the Alps
0:29:45.084,0:29:47.410
do you know that mountain, Mont Blanc?
0:29:49.758,0:29:51.248
it's a very beautiful mountain
0:29:51.248,0:29:53.754
and lots of people take pictures [br]of that mountain.
0:29:54.863,0:29:57.268
But you know, [br]there's a mountain right next to it,
0:29:58.294,0:30:00.720
but not many people [br]take a picture of that mountain
0:30:02.277,0:30:05.116
and so that mountain can say, [br]why is my life so difficult?
0:30:07.891,0:30:12.806
do you think the mountain says that? [br]Yes?
0:30:15.471,0:30:17.948
no, of course, [br]it's the mountain next to Mount Blanc
0:30:17.948,0:30:21.422
it doesn't say, why is everyone [br]taking a picture of my brother?
0:30:25.763,0:30:27.201
well I never heard it say that
0:30:40.087,0:30:43.256
so when we are able [br]to touch the solidity in ourselves
0:30:43.948,0:30:46.931
and be like the mountain,[br]then we don't compare,
0:30:47.909,0:30:51.014
we don't compare we're happy, [br]we're totally happy just who we are
0:30:51.391,0:30:52.567
being who we are
0:30:52.567,0:30:54.829
even if we have suffering, we have sadness
0:30:55.757,0:30:59.060
but we see that that is a part of our life
0:31:01.436,0:31:05.451
and we don't need to look anymore [br]at the others around
0:31:06.902,0:31:09.667
we can just breathe and we can still smile
0:31:11.737,0:31:13.529
You can still smile, see?
0:31:15.354,0:31:18.381
and just be solid like that mountain
0:31:19.306,0:31:22.213
and then sometimes, [br]someone will turn the camera a little bit
0:31:22.213,0:31:23.358
and will say, wow!
0:31:23.886,0:31:27.687
everyone takes a picture of Mount Blanc, [br]but that mountain is so beautiful
0:31:29.521,0:31:31.980
and they will take a picture [br]of the other mountain.
0:31:34.294,0:31:36.455
When you touch the beauty inside yourself
0:31:36.642,0:31:38.545
then people start to pay attention
0:31:39.359,0:31:41.384
they start to look and they see wow
0:31:42.284,0:31:45.442
you are so special
0:31:46.861,0:31:47.964
you're so beautiful
0:31:49.414,0:31:51.330
you're so such a kind person
0:31:54.347,0:31:57.004
yeah it's magical, but it works
0:31:58.598,0:32:00.629
so please try that, try breathing,
0:32:02.863,0:32:04.915
try just looking at the emotion
0:32:04.915,0:32:07.733
when it comes up, [br]when you feel your life is so difficult,
0:32:08.178,0:32:09.062
just breathe,
0:32:09.882,0:32:12.065
just remember the Bell and your breath
0:32:12.526,0:32:15.245
and just pay attention [br]to that emotion inside of you
0:32:16.187,0:32:17.407
and you can smile to it
0:32:17.801,0:32:19.223
just like you smile to me
0:32:20.390,0:32:22.472
okay? can you try that?
0:32:25.073,0:32:27.027
okay, good luck
0:32:30.015,0:32:32.349
[gong]
0:32:35.414,0:32:40.999
[gong]
0:33:09.448,0:33:11.220
je voulais vous poser comme question,
0:33:11.586,0:33:18.416
avez-vous des methodes pour gerer [br]mes mauvaises humeurs et mes angoisses?
0:33:34.825,0:33:36.080
So the question is,
0:33:38.632,0:33:46.880
could you help me with a method [br]to take care of bad moods and anxiety
0:33:49.071,0:33:55.524
what is the method [br]to help deal with bad moods and anxiety
0:34:14.069,0:34:17.381
maybe... I'm not sure if they [br]ever have bad moods and anxiety
0:34:22.539,0:34:23.421
of course they do
0:34:39.484,0:34:41.357
I think I'm in a bad mood right now
0:34:48.482,0:34:52.233
and it's possible [br]to smile to your bad mood
0:34:54.194,0:35:00.955
it's possible to learn how to relate [br]differently to anxiety or sadness
0:35:01.371,0:35:03.198
or when you're feeling down
0:35:03.775,0:35:05.484
or when things don't go your way
0:35:08.887,0:35:13.384
and I think all of us, [br]we have certain habit energies
0:35:13.679,0:35:14.751
the way we react
0:35:16.781,0:35:19.510
to for instance when we have a bad mood
0:35:25.355,0:35:26.602
I'm asked to slow down
0:35:28.565,0:35:30.703
and that makes me even more in a bad mood
0:35:38.348,0:35:42.175
and so for myself I find
0:35:43.653,0:35:47.502
I have to learn how to identify [br]what triggers my bad mood
0:35:49.813,0:35:55.256
very often it's because something happens [br]that makes me uncomfortable
0:35:56.253,0:35:58.398
like I cannot be myself
0:35:59.958,0:36:03.646
like right now, I cannot speak [br]at the speed I would like to speak
0:36:06.881,0:36:09.435
so I feel a bit uncomfortable
0:36:11.649,0:36:12.714
but at the same time
0:36:15.604,0:36:18.725
I've trained myself for many years
0:36:18.946,0:36:22.846
it doesn't mean that I'm good at it [br]already, but it's a training
0:36:24.283,0:36:25.690
to sit with this bad mood
0:36:26.240,0:36:28.133
when it comes up I breathe through it
0:36:29.768,0:36:31.910
and during those few seconds of breathing
0:36:32.141,0:36:35.555
or just stopping and not being [br]carried away by the bad mood
0:36:38.459,0:36:41.956
then you can see it from a different side
0:36:42.819,0:36:45.625
for instance, [br]I'm uncomfortable speaking slow
0:36:46.007,0:36:48.438
but it would help our translators
0:36:51.957,0:36:55.302
so then I can speak slow just to help out
0:36:55.731,0:36:59.474
and then, that kind of lifts my bad mood
0:36:59.582,0:37:02.655
it doesn't have to always be about me, [br]for instance.
0:37:08.842,0:37:12.779
I find, all of us we have a tendency
0:37:13.064,0:37:15.965
when there's a bit of suffering [br]that comes up
0:37:16.534,0:37:18.573
we want to get rid of it right away
0:37:19.853,0:37:24.244
whether it's the bad mood [br]or the sadness or anxiety
0:37:24.920,0:37:27.107
we want to get rid of it right away
0:37:27.630,0:37:30.818
and this causes us [br]a bit more suffering I think
0:37:33.590,0:37:37.048
but when we learn [br]how to sit with it for a little bit
0:37:37.230,0:37:39.249
just allow it to be for a little bit
0:37:39.922,0:37:42.231
we can understand why it's there
0:37:45.483,0:37:48.345
for instance your bad mood [br]may be something very simple
0:37:48.459,0:37:50.801
maybe you didn't get [br]enough sleep last night
0:37:52.374,0:37:58.487
or you've been asked to do too many things[br]that are out of your capacity
0:37:58.819,0:38:00.618
like you over stretch yourself
0:38:00.761,0:38:03.175
and then your body is weary, [br]your mind is weary,
0:38:03.480,0:38:05.899
and then your bad mood [br]comes up very easily.
0:38:06.831,0:38:10.558
So, just to sit with the bad mood [br]and to look a little bit into it
0:38:10.747,0:38:12.511
and to see where it's come from
0:38:15.681,0:38:18.167
and sometimes like I say [br]it's something very simple
0:38:18.986,0:38:21.602
so we all have to kind of [br]train ourselves in this
0:38:22.238,0:38:25.531
and not just to want to get rid [br]of the bad mood right away
0:38:26.182,0:38:31.816
but to identify the reasons why [br]the bad mood came about in the first place
0:38:32.197,0:38:35.492
and then it's easier to learn to be
0:38:35.711,0:38:37.607
and to shift your mood
0:38:41.583,0:38:43.736
yeah, thank you
0:38:46.954,0:38:48.483
[gong]
0:38:51.603,0:38:58.458
[gong]
0:39:12.488,0:39:15.947
Est-ce que vous êtes devenus moines [br]ou moniales pour combler une vide,
0:39:16.814,0:39:18.030
ou pour aider les autres?
0:39:48.042,0:39:54.636
So did you become a monk or a nun [br]in order to fill a void in yourself?
0:40:05.503,0:40:09.425
Did you become a monk or a nun [br]in order to fill a void in yourself
0:40:09.846,0:40:11.704
or to help others?
0:40:14.403,0:40:18.143
I had a similar question [br]but I phrased it differently
0:40:18.502,0:40:20.556
when I first met the monks and nuns.
0:40:22.108,0:40:25.438
I went to a retreat [br]and I saw them smile a lot
0:40:27.276,0:40:32.171
and I was raised in America [br]so I'm very suspicious of everything
0:40:35.929,0:40:36.953
not all Americans,
0:40:37.114,0:40:43.594
but particularly I was very afraid [br]of things that seemed too happy
0:40:45.355,0:40:46.963
you know, like Plum Village is...
0:40:49.820,0:40:52.453
if I was a stranger and I came here [br]I would go...
0:40:56.725,0:40:59.308
there's something very strange [br]happening here
0:41:01.566,0:41:04.459
so I came to Plum Village,
0:41:04.703,0:41:07.616
I followed the monks and nuns [br]for three months around America
0:41:07.899,0:41:12.151
to find out what happened [br]behind the retreat
0:41:15.150,0:41:17.350
and I began to understand more
0:41:19.516,0:41:23.479
that the monks and nuns are humans
0:41:24.178,0:41:26.612
they do have suffering, [br]they do have happiness
0:41:28.008,0:41:32.242
and they also have an aspiration [br]to have meaning in their life.
0:41:33.553,0:41:37.116
so it's not like [br]we are running away from society
0:41:38.692,0:41:45.183
or we are trying [br]to get something for ourselves
0:41:46.205,0:41:51.433
but it's very linked because, [br]if you can take care of yourself...
0:41:51.691,0:41:53.350
I had anger issues
0:41:53.750,0:41:59.396
so if I learn how to take care of my anger[br]and be less angry
0:42:01.498,0:42:02.553
of my father
0:42:02.993,0:42:05.764
then I see that's very linked [br]to my happiness
0:42:07.451,0:42:09.277
so sometimes you remove the anger
0:42:09.650,0:42:14.610
and what you're left with [br]is a lot of space, to enjoy, right?
0:42:16.062,0:42:20.426
most of my young adult life, [br]I was very easily...
0:42:20.860,0:42:25.945
it didn't look like it, [br]but inside I was very frustrated
0:42:26.129,0:42:34.350
and very easily anxious, [br]we call it frustrated
0:42:35.489,0:42:38.404
they call it urban angst, they call it now
0:42:39.147,0:42:40.673
it's very easily...
0:42:42.122,0:42:44.246
but outside I looked very happy.
0:42:45.694,0:42:51.212
I do my job 9:00 to 5:00,[br]but inside there was a void
0:42:52.245,0:42:56.437
and it's related to the anger [br]of not having any meaning
0:42:57.977,0:43:02.841
so the monks and when I follow them [br]I see that some of them do have suffering
0:43:03.375,0:43:05.723
some of them know [br]how to take care of this,
0:43:05.899,0:43:09.138
some of them know how to enjoy life
0:43:09.664,0:43:14.382
to help to be grateful with their life, [br]with their parents
0:43:15.017,0:43:19.863
so I begin to understand more [br]on how to handle suffering
0:43:20.728,0:43:25.610
and how to also live a life [br]more meaningful,
0:43:25.762,0:43:29.507
rather than work, spend, [br]work, spend, work, spend
0:43:30.642,0:43:32.226
so this for me...
0:43:32.947,0:43:34.660
and then I came to Plum Village
0:43:34.884,0:43:39.120
and I started to discover [br]more about their lives
0:43:40.528,0:43:45.239
and then I became a monk [br]to kind of go undercover
0:43:45.804,0:43:49.371
to see what they really do [br]inside the residence
0:43:52.683,0:43:55.304
so I'm still here researching whether...
0:43:58.680,0:44:00.563
they haven't kicked me out of here yet
0:44:00.572,0:44:01.489
yeah
0:44:02.453,0:44:04.448
but I always tried to keep that in mind
0:44:05.659,0:44:09.823
and I see more and more of my life, [br]I became to be more true
0:44:10.871,0:44:14.384
so it's not about empty or [br]you're fulfilling your life
0:44:15.612,0:44:22.046
but, what is the meaning of your life? [br]what is your life for?
0:44:23.998,0:44:27.644
and I see more and more [br]I'm finding out that when you share
0:44:28.964,0:44:31.520
when you can make another person happy
0:44:32.820,0:44:35.403
when you help another person suffer less
0:44:36.186,0:44:37.895
somehow their happiness,
0:44:38.209,0:44:43.394
their transformation [br]is also your happiness
0:44:43.771,0:44:47.012
so I don't have to go around [br]to try to fulfill my life
0:44:47.795,0:44:52.428
and to achieve and then have success [br]and I have a lot of money and have a car
0:44:53.679,0:44:58.017
but now my life is, [br]I fill it up with other people's happiness
0:44:59.296,0:45:00.713
and also their suffering
0:45:01.749,0:45:04.376
when I see a person [br]can handle their suffering
0:45:05.969,0:45:09.174
I saw a young woman [br]come out to the meditation hall
0:45:09.987,0:45:15.825
and she cry, at Lower Hamlet, [br]when after the Dharma talk
0:45:16.388,0:45:21.836
and she ran and her friend tried [br]to grab her and she put her hand away
0:45:22.504,0:45:25.454
and she told her friend,[br]I think, from far away
0:45:25.765,0:45:26.828
she say something
0:45:27.263,0:45:29.670
and so her friend bowed to her [br]and then she went
0:45:30.073,0:45:34.008
and the young woman that was crying[br]went to the bush in there
0:45:34.732,0:45:35.884
and I saw her sit
0:45:37.134,0:45:41.490
and she put her bag down [br]and she sit there for a while
0:45:41.634,0:45:43.042
and I was eating my orange
0:45:46.598,0:45:48.226
and she sat there for a while
0:45:48.495,0:45:52.322
and then she stood up [br]picked her bag turned around
0:45:53.334,0:45:56.228
and you can tell her face more peaceful
0:45:57.314,0:45:59.676
and for me that is my happiness
0:46:01.357,0:46:06.431
you see, so, I also have suffering [br]and I learned how to take care of it
0:46:06.431,0:46:10.431
so I can recognize when someone does that
0:46:12.242,0:46:17.662
so the emptiness we sometimes feel [br]is because we don't have meaning
0:46:18.991,0:46:20.794
we don't know why we go to work
0:46:22.106,0:46:24.200
we don't know why we do what we do
0:46:25.391,0:46:28.389
sometimes we don't even know [br]why we're going on vacation
0:46:30.456,0:46:31.621
you just have to do it
0:46:34.944,0:46:36.906
this is my life before
0:46:37.542,0:46:38.631
it's time for vacation
0:46:40.240,0:46:43.583
what should I do now? [br]spend more money right
0:46:44.550,0:46:48.740
and so this is what, as a young man, [br]I became more empty
0:46:48.900,0:46:53.513
because my life [br]didn't have a higher meaning
0:46:54.795,0:46:59.472
and this is why I kind of [br]chose to become a monk
0:47:00.047,0:47:04.793
not to run away from society [br]but to live more meaningfully
0:47:06.289,0:47:11.086
and sometimes people come here and [br]they say we here are not really the world
0:47:11.205,0:47:12.380
the world is out there
0:47:13.302,0:47:16.608
now I have to go back to the world right, [br]tomorrow or the next day
0:47:17.349,0:47:18.930
and this is not the real world
0:47:20.022,0:47:22.283
and that we have to question that
0:47:23.049,0:47:24.514
I mean if you accept that
0:47:26.738,0:47:31.138
that's why we have anxiety [br]we have depression, we have a lot of...
0:47:33.320,0:47:39.755
so we need to create a way of living [br]that can help us have fulfillment
0:47:40.973,0:47:46.439
and not to constantly be, have a void, [br]an emptiness, no meaning
0:47:46.439,0:47:51.189
vide, what do you mean with vide, [br]emptiness, is a life without meaning
0:47:53.250,0:47:55.324
so it's more or less philosophical
0:47:55.685,0:47:58.188
it's like, [br]what is the meaning of your life?
0:47:59.106,0:48:02.055
what is my purpose [br]every morning that I wake up
0:48:02.915,0:48:05.691
you have to answer that question every day
0:48:07.430,0:48:09.917
and you will see that [br]it will link to your happiness
0:48:11.332,0:48:15.609
and you'll see that it is not about you [br]and your career and your thing
0:48:15.879,0:48:21.270
but it's actually becoming more connected [br]to other people
0:48:21.461,0:48:25.448
strangers, people in need, [br]people in other countries
0:48:25.803,0:48:27.745
who do not have what we have here
0:48:28.416,0:48:31.009
this is what the children [br]are needing to learn
0:48:31.545,0:48:36.012
that's why there's young people [br]asking questions like that
0:48:36.858,0:48:38.651
because they have not seen suffering
0:48:40.506,0:48:44.686
so sometimes as a young person [br]I encourage you to travel to India,
0:48:47.216,0:48:52.209
to Laos, to Vietnam, [br]to see where we live in
0:48:52.955,0:48:54.935
so that's what happened to me in America
0:48:55.305,0:48:56.755
I became very closed
0:48:57.946,0:49:04.558
so when I traveled, I began to see [br]really the suffering in the world
0:49:05.344,0:49:08.822
and then that will open [br]a new way of looking
0:49:09.891,0:49:13.018
so, our view, [br]we need to always open more
0:49:15.127,0:49:15.928
so I hope
0:49:16.549,0:49:23.553
I guess that's my experience of handling [br]my emptiness, by more bringing meaning
0:49:24.672,0:49:28.486
so please, you're still young [br]so really ask your question
0:49:28.856,0:49:31.561
what is it that brings meaning to my life?
0:49:32.012,0:49:34.224
and it doesn't have to be saving the world
0:49:35.097,0:49:39.904
it could be meaning, between your father [br]and you, your mother and you
0:49:41.540,0:49:44.443
so to reconcile with your father
0:49:45.192,0:49:49.294
all of a sudden [br]your life is more fulfilling
0:49:49.885,0:49:52.529
so when I succeed in something [br]it's for my father
0:49:54.029,0:49:57.196
you see when I play with the young boy, [br]that is my father
0:49:58.653,0:50:00.410
so you connect with your father
0:50:01.750,0:50:05.083
so it doesn't have to be a grand meaning
0:50:05.751,0:50:07.132
it could be very simple
0:50:08.958,0:50:11.516
please take care
0:50:14.697,0:50:16.034
[gong]
0:50:19.330,0:50:27.324
[gong]
0:50:47.604,0:50:51.495
Dear respected Thay, [br]dear respected teachers, community
0:50:54.039,0:50:58.371
I'm trying to make my question [br]as clear as possible
0:50:59.385,0:51:03.425
but I feel I need [br]to explain a bit the situation
0:51:05.508,0:51:13.788
my question is about the relationship [br]to my sister, and it's very difficult,
0:51:14.266,0:51:20.306
she has been suffering from deep [br]depression for many, many years now
0:51:21.705,0:51:31.806
and a long time I put a lot of effort [br]into being active and helping her
0:51:32.220,0:51:34.592
which only took me energy
0:51:34.879,0:51:40.988
and there was nothing that could help her
0:51:41.250,0:51:45.195
and I realized that [br]she needs to help herself
0:51:45.916,0:51:49.370
and I could only be there, at her side
0:51:49.806,0:51:52.347
but she doesn't let me be there.
0:51:53.397,0:52:00.141
she doesn't talk to me there [br]and at the moment there is no contact
0:52:00.522,0:52:06.093
and I feel I'm not happy [br]with that situation
0:52:06.360,0:52:09.057
because I would like to be there for her
0:52:09.977,0:52:14.878
and I told her, but she doesn't talk to me
0:52:15.252,0:52:20.574
and last winter retreat [br]I sent her a letter
0:52:21.840,0:52:24.953
I tried to practice beginning anew
0:52:25.478,0:52:32.526
and I shared with her the relationship [br]feels for me and that I wish to change it
0:52:32.680,0:52:35.929
but I have no ideas anymore
0:52:38.061,0:52:44.794
and I asked her if she has any suggestions[br]how we could have a relationship
0:52:44.794,0:52:46.874
how we could talk to each other
0:52:48.425,0:52:50.461
and she didn't react
0:52:51.853,0:53:01.183
and I sent her a message and I said [br]I felt sad that she didn't react
0:53:03.255,0:53:07.192
and then she said I'm sorry, [br]but I cannot do that
0:53:09.427,0:53:14.483
and yeah, since then [br]we didn't talk to each other
0:53:14.693,0:53:17.114
I guess we both didn't know how to do it
0:53:18.705,0:53:24.848
and, so my question is,
0:53:25.870,0:53:32.115
if you could recommend any practice for me[br]that I could do
0:53:33.367,0:53:40.281
I would like to practice something like [br]loving speech, deep listening, but how,
0:53:40.534,0:53:42.404
if there is no contact
0:53:43.002,0:53:50.582
and what happened, what I did was, [br]trying to be happy myself with my life
0:53:51.062,0:53:55.014
but now I feel like, [br]how can I be truly happy
0:53:56.037,0:54:00.691
if it's only possible [br]that I exclude that from my life
0:54:00.899,0:54:04.826
it doesn't feel honest, [br]doesn't feel right to me
0:54:07.739,0:54:10.989
yeah so I guess there are [br]two parts about the question
0:54:11.185,0:54:15.574
is there something I can do [br]I can practice with my sister
0:54:16.544,0:54:22.812
or how could I feel less [br]selfish and guilty,
0:54:23.067,0:54:28.077
feeling letting her behind, alone?
0:54:35.881,0:54:41.901
Dear... I do not know, what is your name? [br]Antonia? Sonya
0:54:42.688,0:54:43.506
Dear Sonya,
0:54:45.892,0:54:52.710
if I listen to you and it sounds like [br]you have tried many, many things already
0:54:53.569,0:54:56.491
you have a very long breath [br]and you have not given up
0:55:00.500,0:55:04.746
it's not so easy to come [br]with a ready answer,
0:55:05.437,0:55:08.630
but I think there are [br]two aspects in this question.
0:55:09.736,0:55:16.261
I think you can look into how, in the [br]meantime, you can take care of yourself
0:55:17.317,0:55:22.797
that you do not also become like, [br]maybe in a depression and so on,
0:55:27.526,0:55:32.467
I would say that it's possible [br]that we overcome all difficulties
0:55:33.935,0:55:36.721
that there's always an end to that
0:55:37.104,0:55:40.026
but of course sometimes [br]it takes much more energy
0:55:40.225,0:55:42.897
and much more time than in other cases
0:55:44.868,0:55:48.352
sometimes in difficulty, like a problem [br]that you have with your sister
0:55:48.786,0:55:52.951
that looks very difficult [br]and that you have tried everything
0:55:53.652,0:55:55.728
and you cannot come to a solution
0:55:57.863,0:56:01.755
I think we can finally overcome [br]all difficulties
0:56:02.601,0:56:05.307
and that is also exactly [br]the way that we grow
0:56:05.802,0:56:09.438
if you manage to overcome this difficulty [br]and then we can grow
0:56:12.974,0:56:15.303
I would like to give an example for myself
0:56:17.088,0:56:21.797
a very long time ago, [br]I had also a big difficulty I remember
0:56:23.819,0:56:26.630
like really big I found that, at the time
0:56:26.880,0:56:33.353
I just came to France and [br]I was doing a course in France, in French
0:56:34.509,0:56:39.745
and it was at a university [br]and we were asked to give a presentation
0:56:41.308,0:56:46.587
and it was like divided in Dutch people [br]and German and French and so on
0:56:47.247,0:56:51.211
and we were only with the two of us,[br]the only two Dutch women
0:56:52.734,0:56:56.557
so it was a kind of 'be-in' or bonte avond
0:56:57.689,0:57:02.126
and we had decided to give a presentation[br]on how to make Dutch pancakes
0:57:03.604,0:57:06.213
and a woman with whom I was [br]she said very quickly
0:57:06.413,0:57:10.730
okay I will bake the pancakes here behind [br]and you are going to stand in front
0:57:11.823,0:57:17.948
and I had to explain in French how we were[br]doing that in Holland, to bake pancakes
0:57:19.974,0:57:22.026
well it was for me the very first time
0:57:22.200,0:57:26.536
it was just after, after college [br]that I came here in France
0:57:27.364,0:57:32.267
so I had never given a presentation [br]like that and not at all in French
0:57:35.574,0:57:37.352
I will speak a little bit slower
0:57:39.078,0:57:42.602
but I remember [br]that I was standing over there
0:57:42.980,0:57:47.410
and while explaining, [br]that my legs came to tremble
0:57:48.248,0:57:52.191
and not a little bit , [br]but they started to tremble enormously
0:57:53.304,0:57:57.238
and I was standing there in front [br]and I did not know how to stop this
0:57:59.463,0:58:01.315
was really like very badly
0:58:02.132,0:58:03.925
I did not manage on that evening
0:58:04.176,0:58:07.332
and I had a very unpleasant [br]feeling about it
0:58:07.859,0:58:13.436
and it has also afforded me [br]to come out again later
0:58:13.761,0:58:16.806
because I was afraid [br]that the same thing would happen again
0:58:17.071,0:58:18.745
and that I could not survive.
0:58:22.159,0:58:25.821
later on I have survived and [br]now I'm sitting here on this chair
0:58:26.077,0:58:28.685
and I'm still, I'm still alive
0:58:29.176,0:58:33.130
so it is possible [br]to overcome very difficult things
0:58:35.614,0:58:38.848
I think for yourself, and in this meantime
0:58:39.982,0:58:42.781
you have to take good care of yourself
0:58:43.088,0:58:47.563
and that you will need a lot of joy [br]like a counterbalance to that
0:58:48.256,0:58:50.355
the depression of your sister
0:58:51.516,0:58:58.283
so maybe you can do something [br]to have more joy
0:58:59.625,0:59:02.209
and it can be like going out or
0:59:04.312,0:59:09.078
go into the nature, maybe you have to move[br]or do another study
0:59:09.187,0:59:14.232
or just you know something like a move, [br]like a change in your life
0:59:14.480,0:59:16.762
that can bring you more happiness
0:59:17.467,0:59:18.748
and what is happening then
0:59:18.896,0:59:24.721
if you have much more happiness, then[br]something's happening here in your head
0:59:25.017,0:59:29.257
now it sounds like it's quite full with [br]this whole difficulty with your sister
0:59:29.989,0:59:32.812
and you're going to make [br]a little bit of space for this
0:59:34.179,0:59:37.258
I think it will go away a little bit
0:59:37.995,0:59:41.518
you will send your energy [br]not anymore to the difficulty in your head
0:59:42.194,0:59:44.942
but more to the things that you plan to do
0:59:45.907,0:59:47.640
so please try to focus on that
0:59:47.880,0:59:50.572
bring some air, [br]some freshness into your life
0:59:51.141,0:59:52.099
more joy
0:59:53.200,1:00:04.311
and I think you will be more capable [br]of trying to overcome this difficulty
1:00:05.573,1:00:07.378
so this is the aspect for yourself
1:00:07.654,1:00:10.773
please nourish your joy [br]and happiness every day
1:00:11.494,1:00:13.051
take good care of it.
1:00:19.397,1:00:22.878
The second part is [br]the relationship with your sister.
1:00:23.161,1:00:27.062
It looks like you have done [br]many things already
1:00:28.661,1:00:32.076
you have come to her, [br]you have spoken with her
1:00:33.516,1:00:37.185
and she did not want to speak with you [br]anymore, you have written a letter
1:00:37.735,1:00:44.891
that is our practice, we try to write [br]a letter, we call it a love letter
1:00:45.752,1:00:48.525
if it is difficult [br]to communicate with somebody
1:00:49.927,1:00:54.075
we can put in a letter [br]how we love the other person
1:00:57.909,1:01:06.773
maybe some qualities of her, [br]you can also put souvenirs in this letter,
1:01:07.980,1:01:09.527
souvenirs from the past
1:01:11.536,1:01:13.502
maybe you have done many things together
1:01:13.690,1:01:15.178
I do not know about her age,
1:01:15.344,1:01:18.500
if there's a big difference in age [br]between you and your sister
1:01:19.293,1:01:21.901
maybe you have done many things [br]together in the past [br]
1:01:22.152,1:01:25.492
and you had a lot of joy and fun [br]and adventures
1:01:26.153,1:01:28.379
so you can recall that in the letter
1:01:30.098,1:01:34.306
nice things that you've done together [br]and that you have very good memories about
1:01:35.468,1:01:39.085
that can help her, [br]that can help her to overcome this...
1:01:40.075,1:01:42.690
it sounds like she's very [br]sad and depressed,
1:01:43.030,1:01:45.552
to overcome, to lift up her mood
1:01:48.657,1:01:53.269
you said you have tried it already [br]but maybe you have to try a second time
1:01:53.985,1:02:00.852
if I was you, as long as there is [br]no communication, no oral communication,
1:02:02.777,1:02:07.147
to keep writing her [br]and maybe to try with a different letter
1:02:13.271,1:02:21.023
[gong]
1:02:55.247,1:02:57.315
So dear Sonia, I just continue
1:02:57.804,1:03:04.232
and so I would like to encourage you [br]to keep going on with writing
1:03:04.493,1:03:05.966
maybe an other letter
1:03:06.905,1:03:09.684
in the style that I just have painted
1:03:10.692,1:03:13.872
with her qualities, [br]with sweet memories and so on
1:03:14.169,1:03:17.338
maybe for yourself in the beginning [br]it's difficult to write this
1:03:17.676,1:03:21.600
because you have done already [br]and no result up until now
1:03:22.137,1:03:26.951
but you will see, if you really take time [br]to write a letter like this,
1:03:27.078,1:03:31.487
like a whole afternoon, you lock yourself [br]in a room with chocolates,
1:03:31.915,1:03:35.592
and you do not come out of the room [br]before you have finished this letter
1:03:36.189,1:03:42.352
and then you go, you will notice [br]by writing down all those good memories
1:03:42.502,1:03:46.495
that you have of her, you know, [br]that something will change in you
1:03:46.881,1:03:50.515
something will change in you and [br]you'll feel a lot of compassion for her
1:03:51.105,1:03:56.390
and this compassion, she will taste [br]from the letter she's going to receive
1:03:57.944,1:04:00.152
so please do not give up
1:04:00.333,1:04:04.269
I really would like to you [br]to continue with her, keeping contact
1:04:04.422,1:04:11.605
and maybe in this way, [br]and maybe later she's going to respond
1:04:11.932,1:04:17.804
I think you have to water this, [br]water this and keeping contact every day
1:04:18.246,1:04:19.284
and in the meantime,
1:04:19.662,1:04:21.363
take good care for yourself
1:04:21.552,1:04:25.938
and that you do not lose hope [br]or that you become desperate
1:04:28.254,1:04:29.102
thank you
1:04:42.319,1:04:45.241
I'm just gonna share that, you know,
1:04:45.326,1:04:49.369
when we, the monks and nuns, are [br]up here for a question-and-answer session
1:04:49.817,1:04:52.848
we are all human beings [br]and we all have our own experience
1:04:54.053,1:04:57.079
so we shouldn't mistake [br]when we give an answer
1:04:57.333,1:04:59.141
that it is like the absolute truth
1:05:00.558,1:05:04.960
we are sharing from our heart, [br]from our own experience as human beings
1:05:05.352,1:05:10.037
just as we all have the opportunity to do [br]while we're here this week
1:05:10.323,1:05:13.576
so we don't need to think [br]that one answer is is absolutely
1:05:14.185,1:05:15.221
the only one
1:05:15.630,1:05:18.186
and there's all beautiful experiences
1:05:18.594,1:05:23.071
personal experiences that we have here [br]and that's all we're here to offer
1:05:24.517,1:05:26.183
so thank you for your question
1:05:35.418,1:05:37.495
So there's a few written questions,
1:05:37.765,1:05:41.560
I kind of grouped them on similar topic
1:05:42.129,1:05:47.198
so the first one is "dear sister, brother,
1:05:47.506,1:05:51.979
may you please share with us about [br]the practice of mindfulness at work"
1:05:53.977,1:05:57.446
and "please could you talk [br]about the organization of time"
1:06:01.998,1:06:09.561
"in my life I always live [br]in a quick speed mode.
1:06:10.697,1:06:13.879
although I practice meditation everyday [br]and I breathe consciously
1:06:15.415,1:06:19.951
I'm still living in a hurry because I have[br]too much work in this time of my life
1:06:20.985,1:06:22.608
thanks a lot, a lotus for you"
1:06:38.379,1:06:39.678
Dear Thay, dear Sangha,
1:06:41.879,1:06:44.602
I grew up in America,
1:06:45.060,1:06:51.108
educated and worked as a architect [br]for four years before meeting Thay
1:06:52.892,1:06:59.487
and so you know the whole system [br]of having a job and work
1:06:59.825,1:07:02.106
is the whole education system too,
1:07:03.199,1:07:09.993
and please know this is a very biased [br]answer so please take it lightly
1:07:11.827,1:07:16.154
I chose to leave all that,[br]so it's very biased okay
1:07:17.074,1:07:24.821
so, we dream to always run after time[br]as if we don't have enough
1:07:26.472,1:07:28.145
yesterday was lazy day
1:07:29.033,1:07:32.435
lazy days that is one of Thay's...
1:07:34.713,1:07:40.750
was it technics up, was it a shot you take[br]so you don't get sick?
1:07:43.842,1:07:47.253
it's a kind of a lazy day, it's a real...
1:07:48.900,1:07:50.952
one time the monks came to Thay
1:07:51.123,1:07:54.916
because we heard [br]a lot of people don't like the word lazy
1:07:55.493,1:07:57.989
and we asked Thay, Thay can you change,
1:07:59.099,1:08:04.264
can we change the word lazy to, maybe,[br]rest day or something more...
1:08:04.941,1:08:09.986
because people feel lazy you know,
1:08:10.666,1:08:13.892
and Thay said: [br]"Don't ever change the world lazy"
1:08:15.105,1:08:17.283
I've never heard Thay so strong
1:08:17.472,1:08:23.195
he said because people feel guilty [br]to be lazy and he said that's good
1:08:23.910,1:08:25.839
they should need to look at their guilt
1:08:26.099,1:08:32.313
because the society is over developed [br]over, over productive, right?
1:08:32.874,1:08:34.401
so we think we're advanced,
1:08:34.401,1:08:38.338
our culture is developed right
1:08:39.310,1:08:43.224
but I think now it's another way [br]of looking we're over developed
1:08:44.176,1:08:48.068
and we're not looking down at those [br]other southern countries and nations
1:08:48.312,1:08:49.906
saying they're underdeveloped
1:08:50.139,1:08:51.388
in fact they're fine
1:08:52.219,1:08:54.237
we're going there to develop them
1:08:55.331,1:08:58.832
and we're making them lose [br]a lot of their environment
1:08:59.627,1:09:01.346
so in a way we have to relook
1:09:02.132,1:09:08.797
we are overworked, we're over developed, [br]we are over timed over schedule
1:09:10.228,1:09:12.500
every time I visit my family nowadays
1:09:12.775,1:09:18.786
I hardly can squeeze off some time [br]from my niece and nephew
1:09:19.094,1:09:26.213
because they go to soccer and the [br]Saturday piano and ballet on Sunday
1:09:26.728,1:09:32.053
I mean even the weekend, [br]the mother has to run to take them to
1:09:32.261,1:09:36.338
and I have to go with them because [br]I want to be with my niece and nephew
1:09:37.176,1:09:38.636
and I watch them play soccer
1:09:39.548,1:09:43.236
it's good you know [br]to have activity for the kids
1:09:44.365,1:09:48.686
but it's a little bit over, over worked,[br]over,
1:09:48.763,1:09:50.658
I think you know what I mean
1:09:50.658,1:09:52.520
that's probably why you're here right?
1:09:54.337,1:09:57.562
so I don't have to try [br]to convince an orange that it's an orange
1:09:59.667,1:10:05.500
so... for working [br]we also need to look at the way
1:10:05.500,1:10:11.520
we do need to work, we're not all lazy[br]it's only one day of the seven day
1:10:12.624,1:10:16.085
and so when we work, [br]we have to reorient ourselves
1:10:17.369,1:10:18.569
like washing the dishes
1:10:19.514,1:10:20.262
you know
1:10:20.262,1:10:25.247
one day somebody will propose, why doesn't[br]Plum Village buy a big washing machine,
1:10:25.656,1:10:29.060
and it could get done quickly, right?
1:10:29.282,1:10:32.736
no buckets and cleaning [br]and then give it to the kid
1:10:33.068,1:10:36.592
to take it, to put it in the thing [br]and it's a lot of work, right?
1:10:37.357,1:10:39.977
you need 20 people to wash a few dishes
1:10:41.548,1:10:45.502
but there's enjoyment [br]while we wash the dishes
1:10:46.605,1:10:49.751
it's kind of like a waste of time,[br]God, get it over with
1:10:50.758,1:10:53.103
so why do we make you wash dishes?
1:10:53.798,1:10:55.144
we could buy a machine, right?
1:10:57.911,1:10:58.655
same thing,
1:10:58.655,1:11:05.187
convenience can sometimes actually [br]diminish your enjoyment, your happiness
1:11:06.084,1:11:07.267
so this is work,[br]
1:11:08.426,1:11:12.642
this is just like the meditation hall,[br]we had a discussion yesterday
1:11:12.642,1:11:16.012
about working in the meditation hall [br]and not rushing
1:11:17.418,1:11:20.757
because maybe there's not enough time [br]and we have to catch the bus,
1:11:22.030,1:11:26.453
so sometimes you know reality [br]you have to do it and you have to rush
1:11:27.056,1:11:31.185
but your attitude is...[br]it depends on your mental attitude
1:11:32.610,1:11:37.709
you do it and some people do have habits[br]and there are different levels of rushing
1:11:37.977,1:11:40.895
there's some people who rush [br]it looks like they're rushing
1:11:41.316,1:11:42.428
but they're not rushing
1:11:44.047,1:11:46.771
some people, it looks like [br]they're really doing it slow
1:11:47.174,1:11:48.338
but they are rushing
1:11:48.990,1:11:50.549
this is a my experience
1:11:51.460,1:11:54.584
there's a lot of, ... [br]how come you're not doing it right?
1:11:55.676,1:11:58.335
how come they're not doing it mindfully?
1:11:58.936,1:12:02.124
you look like you're doing mindfully [br]but that's not really mindful
1:12:03.433,1:12:04.911
so you have to be careful
1:12:05.075,1:12:09.619
some people can do a lot of work [br]and look like they're rushing
1:12:10.468,1:12:13.320
but their mental attitude is enjoyment
1:12:13.431,1:12:16.063
they're doing it for others so it depends
1:12:16.441,1:12:19.344
you're washing the dishes [br]you're doing it for the community
1:12:20.276,1:12:21.620
you're doing a carrot
1:12:23.399,1:12:27.044
you're doing it for the community, [br]for other people to eat
1:12:28.196,1:12:30.399
but you know you don't have to do it like
1:12:31.631,1:12:33.442
peel the carrot like this, you know
1:12:35.975,1:12:38.874
that means you're stuck with an idea
1:12:40.623,1:12:44.083
so work doesn't mean...[br]so we have to be very careful
1:12:44.281,1:12:48.089
mindfulness at work, we have to be careful
1:12:49.377,1:12:52.253
so of course you know [br]take a break on the computer
1:12:52.670,1:12:53.649
and so many things
1:12:53.815,1:12:56.298
you have to use your mindfulness, [br]your intelligence
1:12:58.463,1:13:02.651
to find a balance in yourself, [br]to not lose yourself in the work
1:13:03.281,1:13:05.358
so how you sit [br]on the front of the computer
1:13:05.896,1:13:09.936
how you brew brush [br]so look at the way you work
1:13:10.435,1:13:12.914
so that's just the mechanics of work okay
1:13:13.391,1:13:15.386
and there's also the meaning of work
1:13:16.252,1:13:18.507
so also we have to look [br]at why you're working
1:13:19.192,1:13:20.483
what are you working for
1:13:21.215,1:13:23.281
you want more money, you want more
1:13:23.707,1:13:28.395
you have an idea, you want a bigger house,[br]you want a retirement plan,
1:13:28.537,1:13:30.156
these ideas you have to look at
1:13:30.441,1:13:34.728
that's maybe pushing you [br]to sacrifice the present moment
1:13:36.328,1:13:37.592
for the future, you see?
1:13:38.338,1:13:39.764
so we need to look at this
1:13:39.940,1:13:42.901
this is what I had to wake up from
1:13:44.095,1:13:46.434
9:00 to 5:00 retirement plan
1:13:47.542,1:13:53.656
two garage house a nice family [br]and you know these kind of
1:13:54.506,1:13:57.342
what do they call it, American, [br]America dream
1:13:58.995,1:14:00.916
is this still called the American dream?
1:14:02.551,1:14:05.125
so these are things, with the practice,
1:14:05.479,1:14:08.254
with the deep looking, [br]we begin to look at work
1:14:09.402,1:14:12.983
so I'm sharing is also [br]the meaning while you work
1:14:13.255,1:14:17.567
and it is also looking [br]at our relationship with the watch
1:14:18.587,1:14:20.593
with your planner, your schedule
1:14:20.593,1:14:22.155
these are things that you learn
1:14:22.725,1:14:25.381
and we become very mechanical
1:14:26.543,1:14:29.181
and we don't know why we do it
1:14:29.402,1:14:32.194
we just wake up, do it, do it, do it
1:14:32.750,1:14:34.287
and so we need to look at this
1:14:34.627,1:14:38.896
so find time, [br]so I encourage all the families, everyone
1:14:39.288,1:14:40.954
to, you know, reduce a little bit
1:14:42.320,1:14:48.382
you don't need to have everything, [br]just enough
1:14:49.520,1:14:53.909
and if you do succeed, [br]use that to help other people
1:14:55.114,1:14:58.147
and that will bring [br]more meaning to your work
1:14:58.693,1:15:02.158
you see that the cycle [br]it needs to go in circle like this
1:15:03.282,1:15:05.914
you know the system now [br]is very capitalistic
1:15:06.171,1:15:08.265
to save, save, save, hold everything
1:15:08.886,1:15:11.030
and you see, [br]there's only a certain amount
1:15:11.541,1:15:14.857
and after that, [br]the happiness don't increase
1:15:15.700,1:15:18.014
I think more and more we know that, right?
1:15:18.619,1:15:24.709
after 10 shirts that you have, it's become[br]very hm, another shirt, another shirt
1:15:25.740,1:15:28.539
so please know why you're working
1:15:28.693,1:15:33.879
and how much you should work [br]to maintain kind of enough for your family
1:15:34.233,1:15:38.594
so that you don't sacrifice [br]your present moment, happiness
1:15:38.782,1:15:42.005
with your family, with your loved one, [br]with helping other people
1:15:42.912,1:15:46.968
so your time is not just to...,[br]you should spend meaningfully
1:15:47.218,1:15:50.053
to help other people, [br]to help your friends,
1:15:50.166,1:15:53.670
your relatives, your brothers [br]and sisters, other families
1:15:55.315,1:16:00.227
so you might have work [br]that might not be the most meaningful
1:16:00.899,1:16:04.197
but it pays your thing [br]and then you take the money
1:16:04.398,1:16:06.782
you take some of the time [br]and you help, you see
1:16:07.693,1:16:14.411
so don't try to always, you have to find [br]the work that is the most meaningful
1:16:15.211,1:16:17.490
in fact the meaning is [br]what you put into it
1:16:18.269,1:16:20.378
so you could be a bus driver
1:16:21.208,1:16:23.177
and you could be a very good bus driver
1:16:24.240,1:16:28.215
if you remove the idea that you have [br]to be a successful businessperson
1:16:29.507,1:16:30.420
you see the work
1:16:31.300,1:16:34.311
you enjoy washing your dishes, [br]driving the bus
1:16:35.243,1:16:40.282
so it's all based [br]on the quality of your attitude
1:16:41.151,1:16:42.724
and you can always learn more
1:16:44.054,1:16:44.845
thank you
1:16:48.630,1:16:49.343
[gong]
1:16:51.849,1:17:00.523
[gong]
1:17:20.776,1:17:25.673
(in Japanese)
1:17:39.817,1:17:42.488
dear Thay, dear brothers [br]and sisters, dear friends
1:17:44.588,1:17:45.685
he asked the question
1:17:46.669,1:17:52.211
is there any condition [br]to make people satisfied
1:17:52.490,1:17:53.750
and then become happy
1:17:54.357,1:17:59.025
is there any conditions [br]that can make people satisfied
1:17:59.320,1:18:00.524
and they feel happy
1:18:22.671,1:18:29.391
Dear Thay, dear... what's your name? [br]Ray? dear Ray,
1:18:30.616,1:18:33.236
arigato for your question
1:18:40.849,1:18:44.632
so this question is very important
1:18:46.748,1:18:52.318
and we know the Buddha [br]sat with this question as well
1:18:55.494,1:19:01.147
he asked himself is there any [br]condition for my fulfillment
1:19:01.920,1:19:03.619
for my complete happiness
1:19:05.899,1:19:13.624
and at that time [br]he had a wife and he had a child
1:19:15.456,1:19:19.193
and he had a pretty good career
1:19:19.676,1:19:23.791
maybe he was gonna be [br]the chief of his village, like his father
1:19:27.538,1:19:29.672
so he seemed to have many good conditions
1:19:31.563,1:19:34.729
that most people spend their whole life [br]trying to obtain
1:19:37.763,1:19:40.028
thinking that that will [br]bring them happiness
1:19:41.262,1:19:42.443
and yet he wasn't happy
1:19:44.693,1:19:46.748
and that's why we're all here today
1:19:48.192,1:19:55.601
because he saw that those conditions [br]were not sufficient for his happiness,
1:19:56.123,1:19:57.316
for his true happiness
1:19:59.841,1:20:04.326
and so he decided [br]to leave behind his family
1:20:05.187,1:20:06.409
to cut his hair
1:20:08.165,1:20:10.942
and to live in the forest
1:20:12.950,1:20:16.728
he tried looking [br]for roots in the ground to eat
1:20:19.356,1:20:22.112
he went to live [br]in different spiritual communities
1:20:22.661,1:20:24.514
and he always sat with that question
1:20:25.275,1:20:26.892
how can I find true happiness?
1:20:27.894,1:20:31.560
or another way to phrase is, [br]why is there suffering?
1:20:32.638,1:20:35.580
what is the nature of this suffering?
1:20:38.475,1:20:40.923
and our teacher Thay,
1:20:41.147,1:20:45.449
he often talked about the happiness [br]and suffering like the sides of a coin
1:20:46.338,1:20:49.077
you cannot have happiness [br]without suffering
1:20:50.032,1:20:54.756
you cannot even imagine suffering [br]without happiness
1:20:55.036,1:20:56.363
they inter are
1:20:58.483,1:21:03.508
it means that, looking into our situation [br]of suffering, we can find happiness
1:21:05.368,1:21:08.146
so you could say that suffering [br]is a kind of condition
1:21:09.022,1:21:11.422
that can lead us to happiness
1:21:20.324,1:21:24.624
actually as monks and nuns I know myself [br]and many of my brothers and sisters
1:21:24.758,1:21:26.224
we also ask this question
1:21:27.996,1:21:31.991
because actually we can get quite [br]comfortable as a monk or nun
1:21:34.140,1:21:39.027
you see, here in Plum Village we eat [br]delicious vegetarian food
1:21:40.643,1:21:44.768
and we live with many people [br]who are very understanding
1:21:46.000,1:21:47.547
very compassionate very kind
1:21:48.246,1:21:49.818
smiling a lot
1:21:51.428,1:21:54.423
and we don't have to do too much work
1:21:57.943,1:22:00.711
at least we don't get fired [br]if we don't do too much work
1:22:08.638,1:22:12.598
so, actually many people come here [br]because they think
1:22:12.598,1:22:15.332
wow, these are good conditions [br]for me to be happy
1:22:17.946,1:22:19.040
and then
1:22:21.614,1:22:24.008
and then they find out [br]they have to live together
1:22:25.568,1:22:28.886
with other people [br]for the rest of their life
1:22:38.595,1:22:41.612
and they start saying why? [br]look at Thay, Thay teaches this
1:22:41.612,1:22:46.290
but look, look... they look and they say..
1:22:46.613,1:22:50.613
and so, somehow, even if they have [br]all these good conditions
1:22:51.375,1:22:58.708
of good food, place to sleep, [br]go to the doctor if they're sick
1:22:59.457,1:23:01.014
but they still are not happy
1:23:02.329,1:23:05.993
they're not able to live together [br]with their brothers and sisters
1:23:06.994,1:23:10.913
and that is a pity
1:23:13.316,1:23:15.428
and so we have to sometimes look and see
1:23:18.094,1:23:21.769
is my happiness dependent [br]on outside conditions?
1:23:23.001,1:23:24.286
even here in Plum Village
1:23:25.215,1:23:27.277
we have to ask ourselves because we have..
1:23:27.923,1:23:31.415
you know monks and nuns, they haven't [br]always enjoyed such good conditions
1:23:31.882,1:23:35.576
as we have in Plum Village to practice
1:23:36.263,1:23:42.610
sometimes they lived [br]in a very authoritarian regime
1:23:43.296,1:23:47.264
where they wanted to destroy [br]the Buddhist temples
1:23:48.139,1:23:51.000
they wanted to make the monks and nuns [br]marry each other
1:23:51.376,1:23:53.868
to give up the celibate life
1:23:55.017,1:23:58.027
that happened many times [br]in history of Buddhism
1:23:58.167,1:24:01.166
and that continues to happen [br]today, in some places
1:24:03.864,1:24:06.693
and so even in those conditions,
1:24:07.063,1:24:10.789
those monks and nuns were able [br]to touch deep happiness
1:24:11.589,1:24:17.274
even like, I remember always a story of [br]one of Thay's students who was put in jail
1:24:19.099,1:24:26.533
She only had a little bit of space, and [br]she practiced walking meditation every day
1:24:27.299,1:24:29.790
just breathing, and being with her step
1:24:31.058,1:24:33.800
and she was able to generate happiness
1:24:34.735,1:24:37.986
even just in that tiny space [br]with only a little food to eat
1:24:38.898,1:24:42.451
she kept her mind clear [br]and she enjoyed every step
1:24:43.538,1:24:46.675
and so anytime that I feel [br]that I'm a little bit upset
1:24:46.835,1:24:49.856
because my conditions of happiness [br]are not sufficient
1:24:50.232,1:24:53.187
then I remember that nun, [br]practicing in the jail
1:24:54.051,1:24:55.877
and I feel a little bit of shame
1:24:56.562,1:25:00.064
how could I be so greedy
1:25:03.112,1:25:09.898
and that helps me to remove [br]the external conditions of happiness
1:25:10.983,1:25:17.913
and to see that actually I can generate [br]a kind of unconditioned happiness
1:25:20.643,1:25:25.133
something that's not dependent [br]on external or even internal conditions
1:25:27.348,1:25:28.759
and sometimes we touch that
1:25:28.997,1:25:30.376
that is a beautiful moment
1:25:30.605,1:25:33.603
when you touch that [br]you need to remember it
1:25:33.603,1:25:35.937
maybe you stop and you take 12 breaths
1:25:38.161,1:25:40.710
my happiness has not come from anywhere
1:25:42.215,1:25:44.900
and my happiness is not going anywhere
1:25:46.500,1:25:48.308
there are moments like that in life
1:25:49.725,1:25:54.041
and in my experience, [br]when we practice they become more and more
1:25:54.727,1:25:56.636
and bigger and longer
1:25:57.335,1:25:59.438
and that's why I love the practice so much
1:26:00.256,1:26:03.011
because touching this kind [br]of unconditioned happiness
1:26:05.141,1:26:06.292
but it takes practice
1:26:06.824,1:26:10.984
because we are conditioned [br]to like conditioning
1:26:12.541,1:26:15.547
we are conditioned to like our habits
1:26:15.927,1:26:19.888
even people condition themselves [br]to like their own suffering
1:26:20.865,1:26:21.871
can you imagine that?
1:26:22.932,1:26:25.672
they fall in love with their own [br]situation of suffering
1:26:27.324,1:26:31.259
and when you want to help them to come [br]out of it, they prefer to stay there
1:26:33.123,1:26:39.352
and that is a funny quality [br]of human beings
1:26:41.660,1:26:45.805
so keep that question, [br]it's a beautiful question
1:26:47.121,1:26:48.138
like the Buddha
1:26:48.557,1:26:55.617
you can be a Buddha and ask, [br]what is this unconditioned happiness?
1:26:56.386,1:26:58.026
keep asking yourself that question
1:26:58.396,1:26:59.706
you look at your suffering
1:27:02.816,1:27:06.019
you see it transform and you hold it there
1:27:06.493,1:27:07.614
it's very beautiful
1:27:08.926,1:27:11.647
that's the secret of the universe, okay?
1:27:13.282,1:27:14.102
good luck
1:27:21.458,1:27:23.998
dear friends it's quarter after 11
1:27:24.907,1:27:29.224
and we have a beautiful walk [br]for the community today
1:27:29.391,1:27:33.312
to go down to Son Ha [br]and enjoy the garden there
1:27:33.572,1:27:34.782
and maybe some music
1:27:35.509,1:27:39.087
so we know there are other [br]questions to be asked
1:27:39.319,1:27:43.809
and we encourage you to bring the [br]question up in your Dharma sharing group
1:27:44.520,1:27:47.605
if you feel courageous enough
1:27:48.419,1:27:52.411
there are also wonderful other monks [br]and nuns who can share their experience
1:27:52.722,1:27:55.317
and help with the question
1:27:55.493,1:27:59.233
there are also a number of written [br]questions we didn't get to
1:28:00.036,1:28:04.782
I will give them to the brother or sister [br]giving the Dharma talk tomorrow
1:28:05.155,1:28:06.722
so they can keep it in mind
1:28:08.618,1:28:12.981
and hopefully be able to [br]answer the question in the talk tomorrow
1:28:13.638,1:28:17.271
so I'd like to thank my elder brothers [br]and sisters for coming up here today
1:28:17.851,1:28:19.290
and sharing their experience
1:28:19.568,1:28:22.552
and thank you all, for we do this together
1:28:22.810,1:28:25.169
this is a process of deep looking [br]and we continue
1:28:25.395,1:28:31.845
as we finish the last two days [br]of this third week together
1:28:33.149,1:28:35.895
we will finish by listening [br]to three sounds of the Bell