WEBVTT

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Lucas is a lunatic.

00:00:02.060 --> 00:00:08.060


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He's one of those guys
you either love or hate.

00:00:05.960 --> 00:00:11.960


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And I personally love him like a son.

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He'd be the best cop in town if it weren't
for all those movies he's watched.

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You call yourself a cop, huh, sucker?

00:00:21.621 --> 00:00:27.621


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Let me see your badge.

00:00:23.656 --> 00:00:29.656


00:00:26.593 --> 00:00:32.593
- My badge?
- Yes, your badge.

00:00:28.294 --> 00:00:34.294


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- You want to see my badge?
- Yes, your badge, smart ass!

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You like my badge?

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Or do you want to see more?

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Hands behind your head,
and walking toward the car!

00:00:38.738 --> 00:00:44.738


00:00:38.738 --> 00:00:44.738
Come on!

00:00:39.239 --> 00:00:45.239


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Joyfully singing something!

00:00:41.908 --> 00:00:47.908


00:00:46.046 --> 00:00:52.046
Louder!

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00:00:51.985 --> 00:00:57.985
[Sara, the kid]

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Luck does things like making the
sperm of a fat and ugly guy like me,

00:01:00.560 --> 00:01:06.560


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beget a child like Sara,

00:01:03.897 --> 00:01:09.897


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so sweet and happy.

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I only hope she never crosses paths
with any idiot who would make her suffer.

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Mariano!

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Happy birthday!

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Thanks! You remembered!

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Lola, no gifts, okay?

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Sarita?

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What do you mean you
dropped your father's gun?

00:01:43.203 --> 00:01:49.203


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- Which one? The standard-issue?
- No, the other one.

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Please come. City police is here
and they cordoned off the area.

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Don't tell Dad, please.

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Fuck, Sarita! Fuck!
I'm coming, I'm coming.

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You didn't give me any eye signal.

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And I didn't know if we were
playing good, bad, or ugly cop.

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But I did signal you, Paco.
I squinted my eye.

00:02:03.323 --> 00:02:09.323


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- Where is he going now?
- I don't know.

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It's okay, it's okay.

00:02:10.430 --> 00:02:16.430


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It was an accident. Sara dropped
a box, but everything's fine.

00:02:13.099 --> 00:02:19.099


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Oh, my baby! Sara! Sara!

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Fuck!

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Let's see...
Deputy Inspector Fernandez.

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I got this. I'm confiscating the gun.
Please clear out the street. Thank you.

00:02:27.614 --> 00:02:33.614


00:02:29.783 --> 00:02:35.783
Grandma, let go! I'm fine!

00:02:31.317 --> 00:02:37.317


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This is beyond me! Why would
you let a hoodlum into our house?!

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How was I to know...

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It's alright, I got him.

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What are you doing? Let go!

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Be quiet because this is burglary,
a trespassing-private-property crime, kid.

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- A what?
- It means you're in a big mess, kid.

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Lucas, please!

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What?

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Not so cocky now, are you?

00:02:57.944 --> 00:03:03.944


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Well, don't get so worked up.
It was just an accident.

00:03:03.683 --> 00:03:09.683


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My life is an accident, Lucas,
and it just keeps getting worse.

00:03:06.252 --> 00:03:12.252


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I make a fool of myself
at job interviews,

00:03:08.688 --> 00:03:14.688


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my daughter throws
guns out of windows,

00:03:10.390 --> 00:03:16.390


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and hoodlums pace down my
living room like they owned the place!

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Want more?!

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Well, okay.

00:03:15.929 --> 00:03:21.929


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What happened?
Is the job hunt not going well?

00:03:19.399 --> 00:03:25.399


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Not going well? Hmm!
I've opened my eyes.

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I'm a good-for-nothing.

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I don't know English, or IT,
or how to dance, or anything!

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Worst of all, without Paco's bonuses,
we can't make ends meet.

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I see.

00:03:36.049 --> 00:03:42.049


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Um...

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Lola, take this.

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Lola, take it please.

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Take it please.

00:03:44.924 --> 00:03:50.924


00:03:44.924 --> 00:03:50.924
Lucas.

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Lola!

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- Thank you.
- Of course.

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And don't say anything to Paco, okay?

00:03:53.033 --> 00:03:59.033


00:03:53.033 --> 00:03:59.033
And don't worry about work because
I'm sure you'll find something, okay?

00:03:56.302 --> 00:04:02.302


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Hey, I think it's best if this hoodlum left.
I can't stand him anymore.

00:03:59.806 --> 00:04:05.806


00:04:00.674 --> 00:04:06.674
I'll catch this thug some other day.

00:04:04.110 --> 00:04:10.110


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I wasn't made for work, Lucas.

00:04:08.548 --> 00:04:14.548


00:04:08.640 --> 00:04:14.640
You take me out of my
kitchen and I get lost.

00:04:10.420 --> 00:04:16.420


00:04:10.420 --> 00:04:16.420
Don't say that!
You're very valuable.

00:04:12.680 --> 00:04:18.680


00:04:12.686 --> 00:04:18.685
Besides, there are a lot
of easy jobs. There's...

00:04:14.921 --> 00:04:20.921


00:04:15.355 --> 00:04:21.355
I have a friend who works from
home and earns a lot of money.

00:04:18.892 --> 00:04:24.892


00:04:19.459 --> 00:04:25.459
Really? Doing what?

00:04:22.395 --> 00:04:28.395


00:04:23.329 --> 00:04:29.329
Um... Well, that was just an example.

00:04:26.199 --> 00:04:32.199


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What I mean is that there are options.

00:04:28.668 --> 00:04:34.668


00:04:29.436 --> 00:04:35.436
Okay, but what does that friend
who works from home do? Call her!

00:04:32.339 --> 00:04:38.339


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Maybe she can help me out.

00:04:33.840 --> 00:04:39.840


00:04:33.840 --> 00:04:39.840
Not this job, Lola. No.

00:04:36.643 --> 00:04:42.643


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What? Am I not good enough for it?

00:04:39.979 --> 00:04:45.979


00:04:41.881 --> 00:04:47.881
Fuck, drop the guns!

00:04:43.450 --> 00:04:49.450


00:04:43.450 --> 00:04:49.450
Isn't one dead guy enough?
We really screwed up this time!

00:04:46.619 --> 00:04:52.619


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Dad?

00:04:47.687 --> 00:04:53.687


00:04:47.687 --> 00:04:53.687
Um...

00:04:49.389 --> 00:04:55.389


00:04:50.023 --> 00:04:56.023
I told you this gun is jammed, Paco!
It doesn't work!

00:04:53.360 --> 00:04:59.360


00:04:54.127 --> 00:05:00.127
- Are you staying for dinner?
- No.

00:04:56.229 --> 00:05:02.229


00:04:59.165 --> 00:05:05.165
No, I didn't even have time.

00:05:01.634 --> 00:05:07.634


00:05:01.935 --> 00:05:07.935
Fuck, I need a drink.

00:05:03.837 --> 00:05:09.837


00:05:04.771 --> 00:05:10.771
Fuck! Fuck!

00:05:05.872 --> 00:05:11.872


00:05:07.173 --> 00:05:13.173
Fuck, we got a big problem!

00:05:10.243 --> 00:05:16.243


00:05:16.483 --> 00:05:22.483
This is a bottle opener.

00:05:17.851 --> 00:05:23.851


00:05:17.851 --> 00:05:23.851
You use it so you don't
have to take out the gun.

00:05:21.021 --> 00:05:27.021


00:05:21.021 --> 00:05:27.021
Right.

00:05:21.955 --> 00:05:27.955


00:05:25.525 --> 00:05:31.525
- Hey, Lucas...
- Yeah?

00:05:27.260 --> 00:05:33.260


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- Can I ask you a question?
- Of course.

00:05:29.529 --> 00:05:35.529


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How did you lose your virginity?

00:05:35.702 --> 00:05:41.702


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Fuck! What a day!

00:05:38.571 --> 00:05:44.571


00:05:39.172 --> 00:05:45.172
What type of question is that?

00:05:40.740 --> 00:05:46.740


00:05:40.740 --> 00:05:46.740
Well, I don't know.

00:05:41.941 --> 00:05:47.941


00:05:41.941 --> 00:05:47.941
The type of question for which
I'd like to know the answer.

00:05:45.045 --> 00:05:51.045


00:05:45.145 --> 00:05:51.145
Why? I have more.

00:05:46.613 --> 00:05:52.613


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Don't you think you're too
young to be talking about this?

00:05:48.982 --> 00:05:54.982


00:05:50.083 --> 00:05:56.083
I've already thought about
how I want to lose mine.

00:05:52.118 --> 00:05:58.118


00:05:52.118 --> 00:05:58.118
You know how?

00:05:53.153 --> 00:05:59.153


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No, nor do I want to know.

00:05:55.321 --> 00:06:01.321


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And if you have to tell someone, then...

00:05:57.390 --> 00:06:03.390


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talk to a friend, or a teacher, or write
it in a journal. Tell anyone but me.

00:06:03.630 --> 00:06:09.630


00:06:04.030 --> 00:06:10.030
I want it to be at night.

00:06:06.199 --> 00:06:12.199


00:06:06.332 --> 00:06:12.332
In a cop car with the sirens on.

00:06:09.035 --> 00:06:15.035


00:06:09.035 --> 00:06:15.035
Sarita, have you gone crazy or what?

00:06:10.804 --> 00:06:16.804


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Should we call your father
in here so he can hear this?

00:06:12.972 --> 00:06:18.972


00:06:12.972 --> 00:06:18.972
Is that what you want?

00:06:14.174 --> 00:06:20.174


00:06:17.744 --> 00:06:23.744
Besides, why are you telling me this?

00:06:19.646 --> 00:06:25.646


00:06:19.846 --> 00:06:25.846
I'm your uncle!

00:06:20.580 --> 00:06:26.580


00:06:20.580 --> 00:06:26.580
Well, technically you're not my uncle.

00:06:23.183 --> 00:06:29.183


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At most, you're my ex-uncle-in-law.

00:06:25.218 --> 00:06:31.218


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It's just that...

00:06:27.187 --> 00:06:33.187


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I don't know whom
I'd like to lose it to.

00:06:28.988 --> 00:06:34.988


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If to someone my age or...

00:06:30.724 --> 00:06:36.724


00:06:30.724 --> 00:06:36.724
to someone who's much
older and experienced.

00:06:33.426 --> 00:06:39.426


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Someone who will
treat me with affection...

00:06:36.262 --> 00:06:42.262


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who has handcuffs...

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and a gun.

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Fuck!

00:06:46.473 --> 00:06:52.473


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I'm going with this nutcase
or he might get beat up.

00:06:52.812 --> 00:06:58.812


00:06:52.812 --> 00:06:58.812
- Be careful, okay?
- Yes, yes.

00:06:54.848 --> 00:07:00.848


00:06:56.416 --> 00:07:02.416
Why did you break into their house?!

00:06:58.451 --> 00:07:04.451


00:06:58.451 --> 00:07:04.451
Don't you have your own?!

00:07:00.453 --> 00:07:06.453


00:07:08.395 --> 00:07:14.395
Hi.

00:07:09.763 --> 00:07:15.763


00:07:11.731 --> 00:07:17.731
It's hard to find parking here.

00:07:13.166 --> 00:07:19.166


00:07:13.166 --> 00:07:19.166
I had to double park
and leave the sirens on.

00:07:15.168 --> 00:07:21.168


00:07:15.468 --> 00:07:21.468
Where's your father?

00:07:16.369 --> 00:07:22.369


00:07:16.369 --> 00:07:22.369
- Psst, Lucas.
- Yeah?

00:07:18.071 --> 00:07:24.071


00:07:18.772 --> 00:07:24.772
I got a piercing.

00:07:19.739 --> 00:07:25.739


00:07:19.739 --> 00:07:25.739
A what?

00:07:20.674 --> 00:07:26.674


00:07:20.940 --> 00:07:26.940
Wanna see it?

00:07:22.075 --> 00:07:28.075


00:07:22.075 --> 00:07:28.075
What?

00:07:22.976 --> 00:07:28.976


00:07:27.647 --> 00:07:33.647
[Hey Handsome]

00:07:28.682 --> 00:07:34.682


00:07:34.287 --> 00:07:40.287
I'm telling you she's a looker, bro.

00:07:35.822 --> 00:07:41.822


00:07:35.822 --> 00:07:41.822
A really hot chick.
Let's see if she's inside.

00:07:37.824 --> 00:07:43.824


00:07:37.957 --> 00:07:43.957
She might be hot,
but her father's a cop,

00:07:40.060 --> 00:07:46.060


00:07:40.060 --> 00:07:46.060
and so are his friends and
they have a short temper.

00:07:42.529 --> 00:07:48.529


00:07:42.696 --> 00:07:48.696
Whatever.

00:07:43.863 --> 00:07:49.863


00:07:48.735 --> 00:07:54.735
Look, your neighbor's G-string.

00:07:52.539 --> 00:07:58.539


00:07:52.539 --> 00:07:58.539
Whatever! She's a daddy's girl.

00:07:55.041 --> 00:08:01.041


00:07:55.842 --> 00:08:01.842
Hey, what are you doing?

00:07:58.511 --> 00:08:04.511


00:07:58.845 --> 00:08:04.845
No, I'm out.

00:08:00.313 --> 00:08:06.313


00:08:00.513 --> 00:08:06.513
She must have a burner
between her legs.

00:08:02.382 --> 00:08:08.382


00:08:02.382 --> 00:08:08.382
Who wouldn't want to be
Sara Miranda's thong panty?

00:08:04.918 --> 00:08:10.918


00:08:08.021 --> 00:08:14.021
Your mother's thong panty,
that's what you're going to be.

00:08:10.457 --> 00:08:16.457


00:08:10.590 --> 00:08:16.590
Brat! Give it here!

00:08:11.891 --> 00:08:17.891


00:08:13.393 --> 00:08:19.393
I don't care... damn it!

00:08:16.396 --> 00:08:22.396


00:08:16.396 --> 00:08:22.396
Relax. Leave them to me.

00:08:18.298 --> 00:08:24.298


00:08:18.898 --> 00:08:24.898
Against the wall.

00:08:20.133 --> 00:08:26.133


00:08:20.133 --> 00:08:26.133
What do you mean, bro?

00:08:21.234 --> 00:08:27.234


00:08:21.935 --> 00:08:27.935
What do I mean? Should I spell it out
for you in Morse code with this handle?

00:08:25.171 --> 00:08:31.171


00:08:25.338 --> 00:08:31.338
Against the wall! You too, now!

00:08:27.640 --> 00:08:33.640


00:08:29.275 --> 00:08:35.275
Stay there against the wall!

00:08:31.244 --> 00:08:37.244


00:08:34.681 --> 00:08:40.681
Let's see.

00:08:35.648 --> 00:08:41.648


00:08:37.951 --> 00:08:43.951
So are done yet, RoboCop?
Or are we also getting fingerprinted?

00:08:40.720 --> 00:08:46.720


00:08:41.020 --> 00:08:47.021
Mouth shut!

00:08:42.989 --> 00:08:48.989


00:08:43.155 --> 00:08:49.156
What? You like looking at girls' panties?

00:08:46.192 --> 00:08:52.192


00:08:46.192 --> 00:08:52.192
You like looking...

00:08:47.193 --> 00:08:53.193


00:08:47.193 --> 00:08:53.193
Don't look at me or
I'll bust your head, kid!

00:08:49.963 --> 00:08:55.963


00:08:49.963 --> 00:08:55.963
You like that?

00:08:51.398 --> 00:08:57.398


00:08:51.398 --> 00:08:57.398
How about wearing them?

00:08:53.133 --> 00:08:59.133


00:08:53.533 --> 00:08:59.533
Will you still be as gutsy then?

00:08:55.035 --> 00:09:01.035


00:08:55.035 --> 00:09:01.035
No. Then you'll run scared
because you're a couple of girls!

00:08:58.438 --> 00:09:04.438


00:09:05.345 --> 00:09:11.345
I don't want to see you around
here for at least a couple weeks!

00:09:09.149 --> 00:09:15.149


00:09:09.149 --> 00:09:15.149
You hear?!

00:09:10.450 --> 00:09:16.450


00:09:11.351 --> 00:09:17.351
Get out!

00:09:12.719 --> 00:09:18.719


00:09:12.952 --> 00:09:18.952
GIT!

00:09:14.020 --> 00:09:20.020


00:09:18.491 --> 00:09:24.491
And you,

00:09:19.292 --> 00:09:25.292


00:09:19.292 --> 00:09:25.292
don't hang your panties out there
because they're a distraction.

00:09:24.631 --> 00:09:30.631


00:09:24.631 --> 00:09:30.631
What are you talking about, Dad?

00:09:26.366 --> 00:09:32.366


00:09:26.533 --> 00:09:32.533
I'll get ready and be back, okay?

00:09:28.368 --> 00:09:34.368


00:09:28.368 --> 00:09:34.368
Okay, okay.

00:09:29.169 --> 00:09:35.169


00:09:32.372 --> 00:09:38.372
- Hey, Tito.
- What?

00:09:34.574 --> 00:09:40.574


00:09:34.574 --> 00:09:40.574
I'm running late. Why don't
you take me to school?

00:09:36.976 --> 00:09:42.976


00:09:36.976 --> 00:09:42.976
No! I, I can't.

00:09:38.578 --> 00:09:44.578


00:09:38.712 --> 00:09:44.712
Come on, please take me.

00:09:42.148 --> 00:09:48.148


00:09:42.482 --> 00:09:48.482
N-no. I can't. I'm short on time.

00:09:45.719 --> 00:09:51.719


00:10:00.500 --> 00:10:06.500
Alright, Sarita, off to
school or you'll be late.

00:10:02.602 --> 00:10:08.602


00:10:07.140 --> 00:10:13.140
Sara! Sara!

00:10:08.208 --> 00:10:14.208


00:10:25.925 --> 00:10:31.925
- Sarita.
- What?

00:10:27.127 --> 00:10:33.127


00:10:27.627 --> 00:10:33.627
Sara...

00:10:28.128 --> 00:10:34.128


00:10:44.500 --> 00:10:50.500
Subs by: Mosstracer

00:10:50.500 --> 00:10:56.500