Lucas is a lunatic.
He's one of those guys you either love or hate.
And I personally love him like a son.
He'd be the best cop in town if it weren't for all those movies he's watched.
You call yourself a cop, huh, sucker?
Let me see your badge.
- My badge? - Yes, your badge.
- You want to see my badge? - Yes, your badge, smart ass!
You like my badge?
Or do you want to see more?
Hands behind your head, and walking toward the car!
Come on!
Joyfully singing something!
Louder!
[Sara, the kid]
Luck does things like making the sperm of a fat and ugly guy like me,
beget a child like Sara,
so sweet and happy.
I only hope she never crosses paths with any idiot who would make her suffer.
Mariano!
Happy birthday!
Thanks! You remembered!
Lola, no gifts, okay?
Sarita?
What do you mean you dropped your father's gun?
- Which one? The standard-issue? - No, the other one.
Please come. City police is here and they cordoned off the area.
Don't tell Dad, please.
Fuck, Sarita! Fuck! I'm coming, I'm coming.
You didn't give me any eye signal.
And I didn't know if we were playing good, bad, or ugly cop.
But I did signal you, Paco. I squinted my eye.
- Where is he going now? - I don't know.
It's okay, it's okay.
It was an accident. Sara dropped a box, but everything's fine.
Oh, my baby! Sara! Sara!
Fuck!
Let's see... Deputy Inspector Fernandez.
I got this. I'm confiscating the gun. Please clear out the street. Thank you.
Grandma, let go! I'm fine!
This is beyond me! Why would you let a hoodlum into our house?!
How was I to know...
It's alright, I got him.
What are you doing? Let go!
Be quiet because this is burglary, a trespassing-private-property crime, kid.
- A what? - It means you're in a big mess, kid.
Lucas, please!
What?
Not so cocky now, are you?
Well, don't get so worked up. It was just an accident.
My life is an accident, Lucas, and it just keeps getting worse.
I make a fool of myself at job interviews,
my daughter throws guns out of windows,
and hoodlums pace down my living room like they owned the place!
Want more?!
Well, okay.
What happened? Is the job hunt not going well?
Not going well? Hmm! I've opened my eyes.
I'm a good-for-nothing.
I don't know English, or IT, or how to dance, or anything!
Worst of all, without Paco's bonuses, we can't make ends meet.
I see.
Um...
Lola, take this.
Lola, take it please.
Take it please.
Lucas.
Lola!
- Thank you. - Of course.
And don't say anything to Paco, okay?
And don't worry about work because I'm sure you'll find something, okay?
Hey, I think it's best if this hoodlum left. I can't stand him anymore.
I'll catch this thug some other day.
I wasn't made for work, Lucas.
You take me out of my kitchen and I get lost.
Don't say that! You're very valuable.
Besides, there are a lot of easy jobs. There's...
I have a friend who works from home and earns a lot of money.
Really? Doing what?
Um... Well, that was just an example.
What I mean is that there are options.
Okay, but what does that friend who works from home do? Call her!
Maybe she can help me out.
Not this job, Lola. No.
What? Am I not good enough for it?
Fuck, drop the guns!
Isn't one dead guy enough? We really screwed up this time!
Dad?
Um...
I told you this gun is jammed, Paco! It doesn't work!
- Are you staying for dinner? - No.
No, I didn't even have time.
Fuck, I need a drink.
Fuck! Fuck!
Fuck, we got a big problem!
This is a bottle opener.
You use it so you don't have to take out the gun.
Right.
- Hey, Lucas... - Yeah?
- Can I ask you a question? - Of course.
How did you lose your virginity?
Fuck! What a day!
What type of question is that?
Well, I don't know.
The type of question for which I'd like to know the answer.
Why? I have more.
Don't you think you're too young to be talking about this?
I've already thought about how I want to lose mine.
You know how?
No, nor do I want to know.
And if you have to tell someone, then...
talk to a friend, or a teacher, or write it in a journal. Tell anyone but me.
I want it to be at night.
In a cop car with the sirens on.
Sarita, have you gone crazy or what?
Should we call your father in here so he can hear this?
Is that what you want?
Besides, why are you telling me this?
I'm your uncle!
Well, technically you're not my uncle.
At most, you're my ex-uncle-in-law.
It's just that...
I don't know whom I'd like to lose it to.
If to someone my age or...
to someone who's much older and experienced.
Someone who will treat me with affection...
who has handcuffs...
and a gun.
Fuck!
I'm going with this nutcase or he might get beat up.
- Be careful, okay? - Yes, yes.
Why did you break into their house?!
Don't you have your own?!
Hi.
It's hard to find parking here.
I had to double park and leave the sirens on.
Where's your father?
- Psst, Lucas. - Yeah?
I got a piercing.
A what?
Wanna see it?
What?
[Hey Handsome]
I'm telling you she's a looker, bro.
A really hot chick. Let's see if she's inside.
She might be hot, but her father's a cop,
and so are his friends and they have a short temper.
Whatever.
Look, your neighbor's G-string.
Whatever! She's a daddy's girl.
Hey, what are you doing?
No, I'm out.
She must have a burner between her legs.
Who wouldn't want to be Sara Miranda's thong panty?
Your mother's thong panty, that's what you're going to be.
Brat! Give it here!
I don't care... damn it!
Relax. Leave them to me.
Against the wall.
What do you mean, bro?
What do I mean? Should I spell it out for you in Morse code with this handle?
Against the wall! You too, now!
Stay there against the wall!
Let's see.
So are done yet, RoboCop? Or are we also getting fingerprinted?
Mouth shut!
What? You like looking at girls' panties?
You like looking...
Don't look at me or I'll bust your head, kid!
You like that?
How about wearing them?
Will you still be as gutsy then?
No. Then you'll run scared because you're a couple of girls!
I don't want to see you around here for at least a couple weeks!
You hear?!
Get out!
GIT!
And you,
don't hang your panties out there because they're a distraction.
What are you talking about, Dad?
I'll get ready and be back, okay?
Okay, okay.
- Hey, Tito. - What?
I'm running late. Why don't you take me to school?
No! I, I can't.
Come on, please take me.
N-no. I can't. I'm short on time.
Alright, Sarita, off to school or you'll be late.
Sara! Sara!
- Sarita. - What?
Sara...
Subs by: Mosstracer