[Script Info]
Title: 
[Events]
Format: Layer, Start, End, Style, Name, MarginL, MarginR, MarginV, Effect, Text
Dialogue: 0,0:00:00.00,0:00:03.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Vulture Peak Gathering\NUpper Hamlet, Plum Village
Dialogue: 0,0:00:14.74,0:00:17.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Where is Thay?\NJune 8. 2016
Dialogue: 0,0:00:17.42,0:00:19.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,A teaching from Lay dharma teacher\NEveline Beumkes
Dialogue: 0,0:00:20.26,0:00:22.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yesterday the Dharma teachers
Dialogue: 0,0:00:22.75,0:00:25.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,were invited to come together
Dialogue: 0,0:00:25.54,0:00:28.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and sit near the Buddha,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:28.34,0:00:31.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,next to the hall.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:31.13,0:00:34.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And Sister Chan Khong was there.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:34.39,0:00:39.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And she started our coming together
Dialogue: 0,0:00:40.23,0:00:42.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with saying to us,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:42.53,0:00:47.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,“Dear Friends, I have,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:47.79,0:00:51.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I have a riddle for you:
Dialogue: 0,0:00:52.07,0:00:57.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,," Where, where, is Thay?”
Dialogue: 0,0:00:58.16,0:01:02.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:01:02.56,0:01:05.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No one answered.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:05.97,0:01:11.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But we all smiled.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:12.01,0:01:15.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I thought, right away.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:16.18,0:01:18.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,“Wow."
Dialogue: 0,0:01:18.11,0:01:20.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Is it working?)
Dialogue: 0,0:01:20.98,0:01:22.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Wow.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:22.58,0:01:25.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is exactly the theme of my talk,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:25.95,0:01:28.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,what I want to speak about tomorrow:
Dialogue: 0,0:01:28.98,0:01:33.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Where is Thay?”
Dialogue: 0,0:01:35.76,0:01:39.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,More, a little bit more precisely,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:39.70,0:01:42.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for me the theme is
Dialogue: 0,0:01:42.92,0:01:47.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"In what way Thay is with me?"
Dialogue: 0,0:01:47.45,0:01:53.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And this has been\Na burning question to me,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:53.49,0:01:57.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,right from the moment I met Thay.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:58.78,0:02:02.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I came from a very dark place.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:03.02,0:02:07.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I had been looking for so long
Dialogue: 0,0:02:08.11,0:02:13.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and finally I found Thay
Dialogue: 0,0:02:13.63,0:02:18.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the practice. So precious.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:19.29,0:02:23.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And right away I was afraid
Dialogue: 0,0:02:23.65,0:02:26.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that I might lose Thay.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:26.91,0:02:33.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I might lose him \Nbefore knowing what I needed to know.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:33.99,0:02:37.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I knew that he was the one who could
Dialogue: 0,0:02:37.49,0:02:39.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,teach me.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:39.89,0:02:44.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He was the only one I knew who really knew
Dialogue: 0,0:02:45.01,0:02:51.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,what I needed to know in order to live.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:51.84,0:02:56.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Because I felt very closed,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:56.64,0:03:06.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I felt very fearful, unhappy, hopeless
Dialogue: 0,0:03:08.22,0:03:19.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I knew that I needed Thay,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:19.48,0:03:21.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to get the information from him,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:21.99,0:03:26.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in order to find the way out.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:27.22,0:03:30.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So I was afraid that he ...
Dialogue: 0,0:03:30.50,0:03:33.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,he might continue his journey
Dialogue: 0,0:03:33.23,0:03:36.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,before I had received the information
Dialogue: 0,0:03:36.99,0:03:44.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I needed to be able to swim by myself.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:46.14,0:03:48.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I’ll give you
Dialogue: 0,0:03:48.62,0:03:51.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,a little bit of background information
Dialogue: 0,0:03:52.05,0:03:55.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,about the place where I came from,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:55.20,0:03:58.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so you understand better my happiness
Dialogue: 0,0:03:58.21,0:04:00.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to find Thay.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:00.100,0:04:05.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,When I was 12 years old, or I guess 11,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:05.21,0:04:12.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the world turned grey. I lost my joy.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:13.02,0:04:16.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was very surprised.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:16.32,0:04:18.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I didn’t understand it.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:18.44,0:04:21.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I used to enjoy playing,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:21.61,0:04:24.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,going to school, seeing my friends.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:24.96,0:04:26.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And all of a sudden,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:26.91,0:04:30.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,everything lost its meaning.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:30.31,0:04:34.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I didn’t care any more, doing this or that.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:35.25,0:04:38.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I didn’t understand it.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:38.100,0:04:43.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This mood, state of mind, \Nstayed maybe for a year,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:43.85,0:04:46.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and then it fortunately dissolved.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:46.30,0:04:50.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But it has been coming back, \Nmore or less intense.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:52.94,0:04:57.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And it made me question,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:57.76,0:05:00.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,what am I doing here on earth?
Dialogue: 0,0:05:01.10,0:05:04.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What is the reason of my life?
Dialogue: 0,0:05:05.08,0:05:12.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What is the meaning of life?
Dialogue: 0,0:05:12.47,0:05:18.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,When I was 18,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:18.50,0:05:22.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,there was a booklet
Dialogue: 0,0:05:22.26,0:05:24.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,called...
Dialogue: 0,0:05:24.77,0:05:32.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was a booklet written about the \Nreport on the state of the environment,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:33.41,0:05:36.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,a report from the Club of Rome.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:36.73,0:05:43.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And it was called Dead Spring, and \Non the cover was a dead tree.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:44.07,0:05:48.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was 18. I haven’t read the book.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:48.52,0:05:54.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I understood right away what was in it,\Nand I felt hopeless.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:54.73,0:06:00.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Already for some years, when I was \Nwashing the dishes in the evening,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:00.96,0:06:06.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when I put soap in the water to \Nwash the dishes, I wondered ...
Dialogue: 0,0:06:06.90,0:06:10.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We were living in Amsterdam \Non the third floor,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:11.90,0:06:15.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with many, many apartments around us.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:16.37,0:06:20.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,When everybody in Amsterdam, \Nin Holland, all over the world,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:21.21,0:06:25.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is putting soap in the dish-washing\Nwater a few times a day,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:26.48,0:06:29.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,how can we drink the water?
Dialogue: 0,0:06:29.22,0:06:34.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,How can we continue to survive? \NAnd then this is only dish-washing water.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:35.56,0:06:39.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was then maybe 15, 16.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:39.34,0:06:45.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So when I read, when I saw this booklet,\Nit confirmed my fear.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:46.79,0:06:52.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And, when I spoke about it with other\Npeople, they said,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:53.04,0:06:58.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,“Eveline, don’t worry. \NNature is very strong.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:59.01,0:07:01.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It can heal itself.”
Dialogue: 0,0:07:01.80,0:07:04.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Nobody understood my fear.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:04.71,0:07:11.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I felt very alone for a long time, \Nand I stopped talking about it.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:11.47,0:07:18.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But I always had this fear of \Nwhat is going to come.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:19.26,0:07:28.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I felt a cloud, a black cloud of \Nthe threat, above my head, always.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:29.07,0:07:33.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I didn’t see a way out.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:34.48,0:07:40.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It felt meaningless to me to do anything.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:40.67,0:07:47.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There was no sense, \Nthere was no sense in doing anything.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:47.28,0:07:51.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So this was not a happy place to be.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:51.93,0:07:56.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I thought, well, this is it.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:57.05,0:07:59.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This seems to be it.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:59.56,0:08:08.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I will have to put up with this \Nand live my life.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:09.27,0:08:13.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I did, not very happy.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:14.72,0:08:22.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then when I was 28, I read \Na book about parapsychology.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:23.20,0:08:30.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Para... well, anyway, miraculous things.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:30.18,0:08:35.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I didn’t know whether what was \Nwritten in the book was true or not.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:36.40,0:08:40.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I didn’t say it was not true; \NI didn’t say it was true.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:40.97,0:08:43.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But when I finished reading, I thought,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:44.06,0:08:47.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,“Well, you never know.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:47.76,0:08:53.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Maybe there is more between\Nheaven and earth than I know.”
Dialogue: 0,0:08:53.68,0:08:57.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Maybe... So there was a small opening.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:58.10,0:09:02.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then - I was 28 - I started to look,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:03.03,0:09:07.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to explore in different \Nspiritual traditions,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:08.08,0:09:20.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,starting to read books and going \Nto workshops in Holland, retreats.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:20.26,0:09:24.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then I found,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:25.10,0:09:31.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,then I found a book of Etty Hillesum, \Nthe diary of Etty Hillesum.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:32.19,0:09:34.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She is like Anne Frank.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:34.76,0:09:39.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You may know her, a Jewish woman\Nin the Second World War.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:39.36,0:09:45.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Anne was 12 years, but Etty was 28, \Njust like me at that time.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:45.70,0:09:49.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And Etty became a friend.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:49.62,0:09:53.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I read every day\Na few pages of her diary.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:54.11,0:10:01.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And Etty showed me a way from her…
Dialogue: 0,0:10:01.85,0:10:07.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She was 28, and she died finally,\Nin the war. So she didn’t survive.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:07.46,0:10:12.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But I read in her book that…
Dialogue: 0,0:10:13.26,0:10:16.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You could follow her way, \Nwritten day by day,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:16.28,0:10:20.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and you could see how she was growing, \Nhow compassion
Dialogue: 0,0:10:21.39,0:10:25.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,– I would say now,\NI wouldn’t say it at that time –
Dialogue: 0,0:10:25.59,0:10:29.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that compassion and understanding\Nwere growing in her.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:29.76,0:10:34.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I saw that the darker \Nthe situation she was in
Dialogue: 0,0:10:34.27,0:10:39.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- she went to a camp and the situation \Nbecame, for the Jews in Holland,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:39.29,0:10:42.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,became more difficult and more difficult.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:42.91,0:10:45.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So it was a squeezing situation.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:46.19,0:10:49.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But the darker the situation is,\NI could read,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:50.14,0:10:56.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the more intense and faster \Nher inner light was growing and shining.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:57.15,0:11:02.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And her strength was growing \Nvery fast. And that gave me hope.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:02.77,0:11:09.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Because with the idea that in my life \Nvery dark times might come,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:09.65,0:11:13.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,now I had hope that however \Ndark it might get,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:13.32,0:11:17.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and even when the world around me \Ngets darker and darker,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:17.40,0:11:23.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,then that it may be helpful for me to \Ngrow in the direction of the light faster.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:23.54,0:11:29.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So I was less afraid \Nfor the darkness to come.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:30.29,0:11:34.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then I was so lucky \Nto find some day
Dialogue: 0,0:11:34.42,0:11:39.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Miracle of Mindfulness, \Na very small booklet.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:39.34,0:11:46.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And, um, no, no, before that, yes, yes, \NI was looking.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:46.50,0:11:55.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I kept looking in different directions, \Nbut I didn’t find anywhere a teacher
Dialogue: 0,0:11:56.11,0:12:00.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or a way, a spiritual path, where \Nmy heart really resonated and
Dialogue: 0,0:12:01.23,0:12:03.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,where I really said, “Yes, this is it.”
Dialogue: 0,0:12:03.54,0:12:09.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So, I didn’t want to make a compromise \Nand I continued searching.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:09.90,0:12:13.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then I found \NThe Miracle of Mindfulness.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:14.30,0:12:18.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And before finishing that book, I knew,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:19.02,0:12:26.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,“Now, this is it. Now I have found what \NI have been looking for all these years.”
Dialogue: 0,0:12:26.29,0:12:29.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And half way the book, \Nthere is an exercise,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:29.73,0:12:33.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,“washing the dishes in mindfulness”.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:34.02,0:12:35.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:12:35.79,0:12:38.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I wrote a song about it.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:38.62,0:12:42.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But ... So I practised that \Nfor the very first time,\N
Dialogue: 0,0:12:42.96,0:12:54.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I clearly remember where it was \Nand I remember my experience.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:54.78,0:12:59.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It proved to me, it was such a different \Nexperience to wash the dishes
Dialogue: 0,0:13:00.08,0:13:09.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and really be aware of the movement of my \Nhand, of the temperature of the water, and
Dialogue: 0,0:13:09.16,0:13:12.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the contact with the cup that I picked up.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:13.14,0:13:16.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And suddenly joy opened, \NI really enjoyed it.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:16.73,0:13:22.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And this was what I had been looking for. \NYou know, I was not in touch.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:22.41,0:13:28.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was hopeless, what I missed was the \Nconnection with things.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:28.97,0:13:36.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And here I felt a real, direct connection.\NI was in touch.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:37.83,0:13:40.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So I was very happy.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:40.55,0:13:42.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I knew this is my path.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:42.21,0:13:46.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But now ... the teacher -
Dialogue: 0,0:13:46.49,0:13:53.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because the author was a monk\Nwho seemed to be living in Vietnam.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:55.88,0:14:03.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And who can describe my surprise when two \Ndays after finishing reading this book,
Dialogue: 0,0:14:03.99,0:14:09.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I read somewhere in a newspaper that \Nthe author, Thich Nhat Hanh,
Dialogue: 0,0:14:10.21,0:14:19.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,was coming to Amsterdam - yes! - and\Ngiving a meditation weekend in Amsterdam.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:19.68,0:14:26.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So, I was very, very, very curious\Nto meet him.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:28.15,0:14:32.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I came from a slightly \NChristian background,
Dialogue: 0,0:14:32.60,0:14:47.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So Buddhism .... yes, that was something \Nto be very carefully explored.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:50.08,0:14:58.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then Thay came with Sister Chan Khong.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:00.35,0:15:04.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And right away I felt, well,
Dialogue: 0,0:15:04.65,0:15:07.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was so moved, so moved.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:07.94,0:15:10.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But. I need not explore,\Ntell you more about that,
Dialogue: 0,0:15:10.89,0:15:16.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because I guess that is the experience \Nwe all know when we see Thay,
Dialogue: 0,0:15:17.06,0:15:28.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with his gentle energy, his smile. \NHow can your heart not melt?
Dialogue: 0,0:15:28.68,0:15:31.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:15:33.78,0:15:38.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then I heard about Plum Village.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:39.99,0:15:45.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was May when Thay and Sister Chan Khong\Ncame to Amsterdam.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:45.87,0:15:51.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I decided when I heard about \NPlum Village, to go there.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:51.69,0:15:58.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And when I arrived, \NI felt when I was in Plum Village...
Dialogue: 0,0:15:59.08,0:16:02.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, maybe I should tell you what it\Nwas like.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:02.69,0:16:05.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Lower Hamlet ...
Dialogue: 0,0:16:05.66,0:16:13.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,at most 60 people, maybe 40, \Nmostly Vietnamese, 6 westerners.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:16.66,0:16:21.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I felt so happy, \NI felt so extremely happy.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:21.60,0:16:24.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I felt really like coming home.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:24.19,0:16:28.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I’ve heard so many people \Nafter me using the same words.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:28.80,0:16:32.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,“It feels like coming home here.”
Dialogue: 0,0:16:38.62,0:16:43.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I went back to Amsterdam and I thought
Dialogue: 0,0:16:44.03,0:16:52.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I thought, “Now my life has changed; \Nnow I will be happy.”
Dialogue: 0,0:16:54.62,0:17:01.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I really believed that. \NAnd I was so surprised that within …
Dialogue: 0,0:17:02.18,0:17:13.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in less than 3 days I was back in my \Nold track of … as I used to feel before.
Dialogue: 0,0:17:13.58,0:17:19.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And so we, here, of course, \Nwe understand that was because …
Dialogue: 0,0:17:20.71,0:17:26.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because… there was no Sangha. \NThere was no Sangha!
Dialogue: 0,0:17:28.22,0:17:32.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Next summer I went back to Plum Village,\Nof course looking forward, very much.
Dialogue: 0,0:17:33.42,0:17:38.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And the same experience, \Nenjoying it so deeply.
Dialogue: 0,0:17:39.45,0:17:47.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then I remember one day I was in the\Nlibrary, a very small room,
Dialogue: 0,0:17:47.61,0:17:55.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I read a magazine. And until the \Nday of today I remember what I read there.
Dialogue: 0,0:17:55.96,0:18:00.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It made a very deep impression. It was an\Narticle about
Dialogue: 0,0:18:00.57,0:18:10.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Rumi, from the twelfth century, \NI think a Sufi mystic.
Dialogue: 0,0:18:10.36,0:18:20.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And in the article it was described \Nhow much Rumi loved his master.
Dialogue: 0,0:18:20.57,0:18:27.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He loved him so dearly. And I really \Ncould connect with that.
Dialogue: 0,0:18:27.16,0:18:35.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then, his master died, \Nand Rumi was inconsolable.
Dialogue: 0,0:18:35.96,0:18:39.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And surely I could connect with that.
Dialogue: 0,0:18:40.43,0:18:47.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And there was a description of how\NRumi kept looking for his master.
Dialogue: 0,0:18:47.66,0:18:51.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He kept looking and looking \Nand looking for years.
Dialogue: 0,0:18:51.77,0:18:58.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then, after 5 years, it was written,\Nhe found his master.
Dialogue: 0,0:18:58.15,0:19:03.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He found him everywhere.
Dialogue: 0,0:19:04.00,0:19:07.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And that was such a hopeful news to me. \N
Dialogue: 0,0:19:07.24,0:19:14.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I thought - and it was a deep intention,\Na deep determination, deep in me -
Dialogue: 0,0:19:14.57,0:19:20.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"This is what I want, \NI want to find Thay everywhere."
Dialogue: 0,0:19:20.91,0:19:26.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But in the magazine was not a description.
Dialogue: 0,0:19:27.16,0:19:36.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I had no clue how Rumi had found his \Nmaster. So this was a koan.
Dialogue: 0,0:19:36.22,0:19:42.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I had to find out for myself.
Dialogue: 0,0:19:46.95,0:19:51.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(The bell is awoken... )
Dialogue: 0,0:19:51.52,0:20:18.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(The bell is invited one time...)
Dialogue: 0,0:20:30.13,0:20:35.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So this was a question that I was holding \Nin my heart,
Dialogue: 0,0:20:36.25,0:20:39.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,knowing about Rumi’s example
Dialogue: 0,0:20:39.55,0:20:47.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,. And for me the question was: \N“How can I find Thay everywhere?”
Dialogue: 0,0:20:47.37,0:20:51.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So it was in my heart. \NI carried it along.
Dialogue: 0,0:20:51.57,0:20:57.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Then around Christmas that same year, Thay\Nand Sister Chan Khong offered a retreat
Dialogue: 0,0:20:57.56,0:21:03.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in Paris, in Fleur de Cactus, \Nwhich is now Maison de l’Inspire.
Dialogue: 0,0:21:03.60,0:21:08.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I think we were about 20, 25 people then.
Dialogue: 0,0:21:08.81,0:21:20.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I had started to think \Nabout quitting my job.
Dialogue: 0,0:21:20.07,0:21:26.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I felt very unhappy at my job. And at \Nfirst, I had been thinking that,
Dialogue: 0,0:21:26.07,0:21:33.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with the practice, I should be able \Nto make myself happy there.
Dialogue: 0,0:21:33.30,0:21:43.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I tried, but I did not succeed. And then, \None day I heard Thay say that a seedling -
Dialogue: 0,0:21:43.52,0:21:47.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,-- you know, \Na seed that has just sprouted --- \N
Dialogue: 0,0:21:47.54,0:21:52.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,a seedling needs protection\Nin order to grow.
Dialogue: 0,0:21:52.32,0:21:56.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then I knew I had \Npermission to leave my job.
Dialogue: 0,0:21:56.17,0:21:59.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:21:59.47,0:22:05.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But I was deadly scared to do so.
Dialogue: 0,0:22:05.06,0:22:11.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And during that winter retreat,\NI spoke about my situation and my fear
Dialogue: 0,0:22:11.14,0:22:13.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with Thay and with Sister Chan Khong.
Dialogue: 0,0:22:13.92,0:22:25.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And when I left, Thay said to me,\N“Eveline, we are with you.”
Dialogue: 0,0:22:25.41,0:22:30.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Well, those were precious words.
Dialogue: 0,0:22:31.27,0:22:35.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,“We are with you.”
Dialogue: 0,0:22:35.28,0:22:41.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don’t know how often I have turned \Nthese words around in my mind,
Dialogue: 0,0:22:41.38,0:22:49.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,wondering what exactly Thay meant by\N“We are with you.”
Dialogue: 0,0:22:49.19,0:22:56.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In what way?
Dialogue: 0,0:22:56.26,0:23:04.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And what came up was a story I had read \Nin a book a few years ago,
Dialogue: 0,0:23:04.86,0:23:09.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,one of the books \NI read on my quest for a path.
Dialogue: 0,0:23:09.44,0:23:14.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The book was called \NLiving with the Himalayan Masters,
Dialogue: 0,0:23:14.74,0:23:21.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the masters of the Himalayas, and one of \Nthe stories in the book described
Dialogue: 0,0:23:21.92,0:23:31.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,a disciple who was walking by night \Non a very small mountain path, alone.
Dialogue: 0,0:23:31.37,0:23:37.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And all of a sudden, he slipped from the \Nroad and fell into an abyss.
Dialogue: 0,0:23:37.98,0:23:47.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then, miraculously, his master lifted \Nhim up and put him back on the path.
Dialogue: 0,0:23:47.27,0:23:56.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So that story came up, reflecting on \Nthe question, “How is Thay with me?”
Dialogue: 0,0:23:56.54,0:24:04.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It didn’t feel like this was the way that \NThay was with me.
Dialogue: 0,0:24:04.19,0:24:09.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,A few months later, I did quit my job, and
Dialogue: 0,0:24:09.37,0:24:15.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I went to America on invitation \Nof a monk and a friend,
Dialogue: 0,0:24:15.38,0:24:23.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who both lived in San Francisco,\Nand who had invited me to go there.
Dialogue: 0,0:24:23.09,0:24:30.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Again, I was deadly scared to make such a\Nbig trip, with an airplane, all by myself,
Dialogue: 0,0:24:30.47,0:24:35.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to America. \NBut, I wanted the adventure.
Dialogue: 0,0:24:35.60,0:24:37.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No, that’s not true.
Dialogue: 0,0:24:37.16,0:24:44.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I wanted, in fact, to explore the \Ndifferent Zen centers that were in America,
Dialogue: 0,0:24:44.44,0:24:49.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because in Holland by that time, we had \Nno Zen centers at all.
Dialogue: 0,0:24:49.90,0:24:56.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And from coming in Plum Village, I had \Nheard from people coming from America
Dialogue: 0,0:24:56.13,0:25:00.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that there were places in America \Nwhere you could practice.
Dialogue: 0,0:25:00.49,0:25:07.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I was curious to go there and \Nto see other teachers than Thay.
Dialogue: 0,0:25:07.78,0:25:14.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thay was the only teacher that I knew. \NI can tell you, that it just confirmed,
Dialogue: 0,0:25:14.62,0:25:22.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,being in America, that I was on \Nthe right path being with Thay.
Dialogue: 0,0:25:22.43,0:25:28.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Okay. I went to San Francisco,\Ninvited by Thay Tu Luc.
Dialogue: 0,0:25:28.17,0:25:33.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And he was living in a temple there, \Nin the busy streets.
Dialogue: 0,0:25:33.26,0:25:37.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then he said, “Eveline, if you want \Nto, I can bring you to the monastery
Dialogue: 0,0:25:37.26,0:25:43.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in the mountains, in the middle\Nof the woods, the Kim Son monastery.”
Dialogue: 0,0:25:43.11,0:25:50.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That seemed a very nice adventure. \NSo I went to the Kim Son monastery,
Dialogue: 0,0:25:50.37,0:25:52.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I enjoyed it very much,
Dialogue: 0,0:25:52.12,0:25:57.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with the redwood trees, the woods\N- I had never seen so beautiful.
Dialogue: 0,0:25:57.29,0:26:00.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was really wild there.
Dialogue: 0,0:26:00.85,0:26:06.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And after - I was planning to stay in \NAmerica for half a year at least,
Dialogue: 0,0:26:06.23,0:26:11.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,maybe a year - and after a few weeks,
Dialogue: 0,0:26:11.46,0:26:17.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,guess who visited, who came to \Nthe Kim Son monastery?
Dialogue: 0,0:26:17.49,0:26:19.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:26:19.24,0:26:27.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yes, yes, Thay came. I had no idea. \NFor me this was worlds apart.
Dialogue: 0,0:26:27.100,0:26:32.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And all of a sudden, there he was. \NAnd he recognized me,
Dialogue: 0,0:26:32.97,0:26:39.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the woman with the bicycle, because \NI came to Plum Village on my bicycle.
Dialogue: 0,0:26:39.06,0:26:41.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:26:41.52,0:26:48.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Not all the way from Amsterdam.
Dialogue: 0,0:26:48.09,0:26:57.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I was so happy to be with Thay, \Nso happy, and I started to wonder,
Dialogue: 0,0:26:57.79,0:27:02.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,“Is it a good decision to stay in America? \N
Dialogue: 0,0:27:02.47,0:27:09.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Shouldn’t I go back to Europe \Nand spend the summer in Plum Village?
Dialogue: 0,0:27:09.53,0:27:13.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It’s so precious to be with Thay. \NWho knows how long he is around?”
Dialogue: 0,0:27:13.36,0:27:18.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(I always was aware of that.) \N“Shouldn’t I go back?”
Dialogue: 0,0:27:18.30,0:27:22.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was doubting and doubting.
Dialogue: 0,0:27:22.24,0:27:26.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was a squeezing question\Nbecause finally I had come to America.
Dialogue: 0,0:27:26.95,0:27:30.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It had taken me so much courage \Nto make this step.
Dialogue: 0,0:27:30.32,0:27:34.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now I was here, and should I go back?
Dialogue: 0,0:27:34.16,0:27:38.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So, I haven’t asked Thay many \Nquestions in my life,
Dialogue: 0,0:27:38.16,0:27:40.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but this is one of the questions I asked him.
Dialogue: 0,0:27:40.76,0:27:47.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I went to him and explained the situation \Nand asked him, “Thay, what do you think?
Dialogue: 0,0:27:47.72,0:27:55.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Should I stay or should I go \Nand be with you in the summer retreat?”
Dialogue: 0,0:27:55.78,0:27:59.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And you may guess what Thay answered...
Dialogue: 0,0:28:00.59,0:28:07.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He said - a very nice answer that I always \Nkeep with me when I have to make a choice
Dialogue: 0,0:28:07.31,0:28:09.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- “Both are OK.”
Dialogue: 0,0:28:09.82,0:28:17.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:28:17.62,0:28:20.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I decided to stay.
Dialogue: 0,0:28:20.98,0:28:28.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then after about ten days, \Nthe moment came that Thay left us again.
Dialogue: 0,0:28:28.68,0:28:34.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was a beautiful day, a beautiful evening.
Dialogue: 0,0:28:34.46,0:28:38.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thay was gone and I had decided to stay,\N
Dialogue: 0,0:28:38.34,0:28:44.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I knew I wouldn’t see him \Nfor a very long time.
Dialogue: 0,0:28:44.01,0:28:54.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I went - I felt sad,\Nand I went into nature. I sat on a tree.
Dialogue: 0,0:28:54.56,0:29:01.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I sat for hours there in the neighbourhood\Nof the temple, looking at the trees,
Dialogue: 0,0:29:01.95,0:29:08.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,at the sky and the sky was turning dark.
Dialogue: 0,0:29:08.12,0:29:18.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And of course, I was wondering,\N"In what way Thay is with me?"
Dialogue: 0,0:29:18.40,0:29:28.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then as I was looking at the sky, there\Nwere mountains, mountains very far away.
Dialogue: 0,0:29:28.60,0:29:36.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And all of a sudden I noticed there was \Nsome light above the mountains.
Dialogue: 0,0:29:36.12,0:29:43.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was surprised. I thought I must not \Nhave been looking very well before,
Dialogue: 0,0:29:43.45,0:29:49.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because I never noticed \Nthere was a city over there.
Dialogue: 0,0:29:49.56,0:29:55.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But the light grew intenser, \Nmore and more light.
Dialogue: 0,0:29:55.75,0:30:03.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then, all of a sudden, \Nthere was the moon.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:03.45,0:30:07.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was not a city. \NIt was the light of the moon.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:07.42,0:30:13.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And as the moon was rising, \Nit wasn’t just the moon.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:13.35,0:30:23.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was the most amazing, biggest,\Nradiant moon I have ever seen.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:23.07,0:30:34.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I could spread my arms to show \Nhow huge this moon was.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:34.78,0:30:41.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And it moved so gracefully. \NThere were no clouds in the sky,
Dialogue: 0,0:30:41.06,0:30:48.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,none at all. It was a very silent evening, \Nwithout the wind, very peaceful.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:48.76,0:30:57.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And very, very slowly, without moving, \Nthe moon was moving and rising and rising.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:57.92,0:31:04.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And all of a sudden there was \Na sound, the sound of the bell:
Dialogue: 0,0:31:04.36,0:31:10.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the bell inviting us to come to meditation.
Dialogue: 0,0:31:10.38,0:31:18.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was not happy. \NI was so gazing at the moon.
Dialogue: 0,0:31:18.66,0:31:21.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was completely connected,
Dialogue: 0,0:31:21.36,0:31:28.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I was so happy - and unhappy \Nat the same time as I was missing Thay.
Dialogue: 0,0:31:28.85,0:31:36.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And after - I don’t understand now \Nwhy I made the decision,
Dialogue: 0,0:31:36.05,0:31:38.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because now I would have\Nmade a different decision,
Dialogue: 0,0:31:38.84,0:31:46.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but in those days I obviously did more\Nwhat was expected of me.
Dialogue: 0,0:31:46.21,0:31:49.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So I went in.
Dialogue: 0,0:31:49.66,0:31:55.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And as soon as I was in \Nwith the other people, I did regret it.
Dialogue: 0,0:31:55.36,0:31:59.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I thought, “What have I done? \NI should have stayed outside!”
Dialogue: 0,0:31:59.56,0:32:08.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Fortunately, the Kim Son monastery\Nhas huge glass windows, really
Dialogue: 0,0:32:08.07,0:32:11.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- at least,in my memory,\Nbut then it’s thirty years ago,
Dialogue: 0,0:32:11.53,0:32:17.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but in my memory the windows are \Nfrom the floor to the ceiling.
Dialogue: 0,0:32:17.10,0:32:23.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So, I took a place, I choose a place from \Nwhere I could see the moon.
Dialogue: 0,0:32:23.05,0:32:29.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I continued to look at the moon.\NI wasn’t very concentrated.
Dialogue: 0,0:32:29.84,0:32:37.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I felt sad. Thay wasn’t there. I had\Ncome inside. I should have stayed outside.
Dialogue: 0,0:32:37.34,0:32:44.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And as much as possible, \NI tried to stay connected with the moon.
Dialogue: 0,0:32:44.74,0:32:54.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then something happened. \NI’ve never understood it. Not even today.
Dialogue: 0,0:32:54.57,0:32:57.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But what happened was that
Dialogue: 0,0:32:57.62,0:33:05.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,this huge, brilliant, radiant moon\Nthat I saw shining over there,
Dialogue: 0,0:33:05.74,0:33:15.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,began shining from my own belly, \Njust as big and radiant.
Dialogue: 0,0:33:15.51,0:33:22.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I saw it. It wasn’t something I figured \Nwith my mind. It happened to me.
Dialogue: 0,0:33:22.50,0:33:26.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And as we say in Dutch, “Ik stond er bij\Nen ik keek er naar.” Ik zat er bij.
Dialogue: 0,0:33:26.50,0:33:31.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Translated to English: “I stood there, and\NI looked at what was there.” I sat there.]
Dialogue: 0,0:33:31.22,0:33:35.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So I just observed it, in surprise.
Dialogue: 0,0:33:35.90,0:33:40.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Something else happened \Nat the same moment.
Dialogue: 0,0:33:40.46,0:33:43.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,As this moon was shining
Dialogue: 0,0:33:43.14,0:33:48.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,-- now there were two moons, \Nthe moon outside and the moon inside --
Dialogue: 0,0:33:48.82,0:33:57.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,at the same time, I felt that\NThay’s smile was sinking into me.
Dialogue: 0,0:33:57.25,0:34:02.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I really felt it.\NI had seen Thay smiling so often.
Dialogue: 0,0:34:02.93,0:34:09.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And his smile, his serenity, \Nwas just sinking into me,
Dialogue: 0,0:34:09.66,0:34:16.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I felt it resting\Nat the bottom of my being. \N
Dialogue: 0,0:34:16.15,0:34:26.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I knew, I would always find Thay there.
Dialogue: 0,0:34:26.39,0:34:34.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I had, from Store Consciousness I think, \Nreceived an answer to my question,
Dialogue: 0,0:34:34.98,0:34:43.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,“How is Thay with me?”
Dialogue: 0,0:34:43.85,0:34:48.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I always can find him there.
Dialogue: 0,0:34:48.51,0:34:55.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Although there have been waves - \Nbut they have been on the surface -
Dialogue: 0,0:34:55.14,0:35:03.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in the depths of my being, \NI feel Thay’s presence.
Dialogue: 0,0:35:03.03,0:35:08.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Then I stayed one year in America.
Dialogue: 0,0:35:08.36,0:35:12.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,When I came back to Europe, Plum Village
Dialogue: 0,0:35:12.31,0:35:19.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,opened its doors for the very first time\Nto residents, permanent residents,
Dialogue: 0,0:35:19.31,0:35:24.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,\Nand I didn’t need to think what to do.
Dialogue: 0,0:35:24.28,0:35:32.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Of course, I went to live in Plum Village.\NThis could be a story in itself.
Dialogue: 0,0:35:32.88,0:35:37.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:35:38.36,0:35:40.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Sister Chan Khong asks from off-stage: \N“Can you sing your song?”]
Dialogue: 0,0:35:40.76,0:35:43.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yes, yes, it’s coming, Sister Chan Khong.
Dialogue: 0,0:35:43.20,0:35:46.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:35:46.73,0:35:49.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yes, yes, yes. .
Dialogue: 0,0:35:49.10,0:35:57.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was given a room from where\NI could watch the sunset every evening
Dialogue: 0,0:35:57.97,0:36:00.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was so beautiful. \N
Dialogue: 0,0:36:00.36,0:36:06.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Looking around.]\NNo, no, we are in Upper Hamlet.
Dialogue: 0,0:36:06.84,0:36:12.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And there... So that was maybe a \Nfew months after coming back from America.
Dialogue: 0,0:36:12.96,0:36:19.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And there Thay invited all of us\N– that means eight people - \N
Dialogue: 0,0:36:19.68,0:36:28.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to express our experience with \Nthe practice in a creative way. \N
Dialogue: 0,0:36:28.16,0:36:33.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He encouraged us to sing and to write songs.
Dialogue: 0,0:36:33.50,0:36:39.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And so I wrote a song about \Nthis experience of the moon:
Dialogue: 0,0:36:39.60,0:36:44.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,together, the moon in America \Nand the sun in Plum Village.
Dialogue: 0,0:36:44.23,0:36:49.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I’ll give it a try...
Dialogue: 0,0:37:11.33,0:37:15.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The sun is going down,
Dialogue: 0,0:37:15.65,0:37:21.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the sky is turning grey.
Dialogue: 0,0:37:21.40,0:37:25.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The day has not yet ended
Dialogue: 0,0:37:25.57,0:37:31.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,while the night is on its way.
Dialogue: 0,0:37:31.70,0:37:36.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I hear a last bird singing,
Dialogue: 0,0:37:36.09,0:37:41.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I join it in its song.
Dialogue: 0,0:37:41.11,0:37:46.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then everything falls silent
Dialogue: 0,0:37:46.08,0:37:52.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,while the twilight lingers on.
Dialogue: 0,0:37:52.97,0:37:57.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now the stars are growing brighter,\N
Dialogue: 0,0:37:57.77,0:38:03.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we are waiting for the moon.
Dialogue: 0,0:38:03.04,0:38:08.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It is rising from a mountain
Dialogue: 0,0:38:08.66,0:38:13.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like a luminous balloon.\N
Dialogue: 0,0:38:13.93,0:38:19.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Shining brighter than the sunshine,
Dialogue: 0,0:38:19.71,0:38:24.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,smiling limitless serene,\N
Dialogue: 0,0:38:24.73,0:38:30.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Shining inside, shining outside,
Dialogue: 0,0:38:30.84,0:38:36.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it’s a moon I’ve never seen.
Dialogue: 0,0:38:36.62,0:38:42.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I keep looking in amazement,
Dialogue: 0,0:38:42.95,0:38:48.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I keep looking in delight.\N
Dialogue: 0,0:38:48.20,0:38:53.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Every leaf has turned transparent;
Dialogue: 0,0:38:53.68,0:38:59.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,now it seems no longer night.\N
Dialogue: 0,0:38:59.70,0:39:05.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I would like to look forever,
Dialogue: 0,0:39:05.45,0:39:10.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I pray we never part.\N
Dialogue: 0,0:39:10.65,0:39:16.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Then at once I find it shining
Dialogue: 0,0:39:16.45,0:39:22.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,from the bottom from my heart.
Dialogue: 0,0:39:22.95,0:39:28.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Shining brighter than the sunshine,
Dialogue: 0,0:39:28.88,0:39:33.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,smiling limitless serene,\N
Dialogue: 0,0:39:33.91,0:39:39.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Shining inside, shining outside,
Dialogue: 0,0:39:39.58,0:39:45.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it’s a moon I’ve never seen.\N
Dialogue: 0,0:39:45.33,0:39:51.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I keep looking in amazement,
Dialogue: 0,0:39:51.08,0:39:56.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I keep looking in delight.\N
Dialogue: 0,0:39:56.16,0:40:02.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And my joy surmounts the mountains,
Dialogue: 0,0:40:02.60,0:40:11.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I have found the moon inside.
Dialogue: 0,0:40:27.35,0:40:32.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I’m aware of time ...
Dialogue: 0,0:40:32.42,0:40:41.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And this is one of the ways I have found Thay.
Dialogue: 0,0:40:41.06,0:40:56.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Very shortly I will share with you other \Nways I’ve found Thay in the course of years.
Dialogue: 0,0:40:56.38,0:41:04.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I’ve discovered that when I am \Nconcentrated in my practice -
Dialogue: 0,0:41:04.98,0:41:10.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which of course I’m not always, \Nwhich is from time to time -
Dialogue: 0,0:41:10.34,0:41:19.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the more I am concentrated, really \Nconcentrated, then Thay’s energy is there.
Dialogue: 0,0:41:19.26,0:41:23.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The more I am concentrated, \Nthe more I feel Thay near.
Dialogue: 0,0:41:23.71,0:41:29.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He is there, in my practice.
Dialogue: 0,0:41:29.08,0:41:33.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My favorite practice is walking meditation.
Dialogue: 0,0:41:33.97,0:41:37.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And a few years, no, I guess many years ago,
Dialogue: 0,0:41:39.01,0:41:44.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thay taught us what he did \Nsometimes during walking meditation.
Dialogue: 0,0:41:44.96,0:41:52.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He said, “Sometimes I walk with my \Nstudents, with one of my students. \N
Dialogue: 0,0:41:52.79,0:42:00.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,On my in-breath as I walk, I say \Nthe name of that student. \N
Dialogue: 0,0:42:00.71,0:42:08.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And on my out-breath, I say, \N‘I am here, I am here, I am here’.”
Dialogue: 0,0:42:08.97,0:42:15.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I thought, “This is a very nice practice.\NI’m going to try that for myself.”
Dialogue: 0,0:42:15.66,0:42:18.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I tried it when my father died.
Dialogue: 0,0:42:18.67,0:42:31.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I said, “Daddy, Daddy, Daddy,\NI am here, I am here, I am here.”
Dialogue: 0,0:42:31.04,0:42:36.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And as I continued to walk in this way,
Dialogue: 0,0:42:36.74,0:42:39.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,my father became so present
Dialogue: 0,0:42:39.86,0:42:49.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that all by itself - I didn’t think of it -\Nbut the words “I am here” changed into
Dialogue: 0,0:42:49.66,0:42:55.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,\N“We are here, we are here, we are here.”\N
Dialogue: 0,0:42:55.10,0:43:01.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And the same, when I invite \NThay to walk with me.
Dialogue: 0,0:43:01.46,0:43:09.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,then I always begin with “I am here” \Nuntil I really feel the presence of Thay.
Dialogue: 0,0:43:09.83,0:43:14.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then I change it\N- or it changes itself - into
Dialogue: 0,0:43:14.24,0:43:18.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,“We are here, we are here.”
Dialogue: 0,0:43:18.50,0:43:23.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So this is another way I have \Nfound Thay in my practice.
Dialogue: 0,0:43:23.71,0:43:30.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then, much to my relief, after coming \Na few years to Plum Village
Dialogue: 0,0:43:30.88,0:43:36.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and making friends here\N- dear friends, Dharma friends -
Dialogue: 0,0:43:36.43,0:43:43.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I began to sense that when I was \Nwith my friends, I began to sense,
Dialogue: 0,0:43:43.33,0:43:47.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Thay is here, Thay is here."
Dialogue: 0,0:43:47.72,0:43:51.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He is in my friends.
Dialogue: 0,0:43:51.98,0:43:59.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And that was… that took away my fear \Nthat when Thay is no longer there … \N
Dialogue: 0,0:43:59.53,0:44:08.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I knew I have my friends. \NI will find Thay in my Dharma friends.
Dialogue: 0,0:44:08.24,0:44:15.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And when I heard about Thay’s stroke,\NI was shocked at first.
Dialogue: 0,0:44:15.41,0:44:20.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And that week, I went to the\NSangha in Amsterdam.
Dialogue: 0,0:44:20.99,0:44:30.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And in the Sangha, though there were people\Nwho not even had been coming very often,
Dialogue: 0,0:44:30.35,0:44:36.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but yet the energy of the Sangha was there\Nand I experienced Thay’s presence there.
Dialogue: 0,0:44:36.81,0:44:42.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I was so relieved.\NIt was such a reassurance to feel
Dialogue: 0,0:44:42.99,0:44:48.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thay is really here. I can feel him.
Dialogue: 0,0:44:48.35,0:44:57.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I am also aware that \NThay is in the way I look.
Dialogue: 0,0:44:57.58,0:45:07.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I have taken in so much of his words, \Nof what he has taught, that the way I see,
Dialogue: 0,0:45:07.77,0:45:14.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the way I hear, the way I think,\Nis so interwoven with what I’ve learned.
Dialogue: 0,0:45:14.83,0:45:21.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So Thay is there in what I see, \Nwhat I hear, what I think,
Dialogue: 0,0:45:21.83,0:45:27.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,at least when I’m mindful.
Dialogue: 0,0:45:27.89,0:45:34.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And, now I am in the most lucky place \N
Dialogue: 0,0:45:34.75,0:45:46.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to see Thay all around me\N-- inside and all around.
Dialogue: 0,0:45:46.41,0:45:53.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now, thank you for listening so long.\NIt’s already almost 12:30.
Dialogue: 0,0:45:58.20,0:46:02.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[The bell is woken up.]
Dialogue: 0,0:46:03.51,0:46:21.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[The bell is invited the first of 3 times.]
Dialogue: 0,0:46:21.38,0:46:35.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[The bell second of the bell.]
Dialogue: 0,0:46:35.29,0:46:38.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[And soon, the third sound of the bell.]