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Hi, I'm Samer. I've been in a few 
community groups through the years.

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My experience in a couple of those groups 
was drastically different.

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As crazy as it sounds it wasn't the leader
nor the people that made the difference.

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It was something I chose to do.
Here's what I mean.

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I signed up for my first group 
about 8 years ago.

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Maybe some of you are in a group 
for the first time right now.

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To be honest, it wasn't something 
I was excited about.

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I showed up pretty regularly, but I didn't
think about group in between meetings.

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For me, being in a group 
was really about checking off that box.

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It's what I was supposed to do.
For me, it was just the bare minimum.

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While I was in the group, I never really 
made an effort to be a part of the group.

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I didn't talk to nor hang out with 
the other guys outside of Tuesday nights.

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And I definitely wasn't praying for them.

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I was usually unprepared for the study and
just fake my way through the discussion.

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Honestly, most weeks, 
I just showed up, ate the snacks,

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and rolled my eyes when the same guy 
talked the whole time week after week.

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It was fine, but I wouldn't say 
I experienced much spiritual growth.

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It pretty much stayed like that until one
night, our group leader got vulnerable.

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He opened up and shared some things 
he'd been struggling with as a single guy.

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I remember that he got emotional, 
which caught me off guard.

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But something cool happened that night.
We all rallied around and prayed for him.

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Well, our leader opening up 
gave me the courage

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to finally open up about my story 
and some things I'd been dealing with.

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I'm so glad I did because they encouraged,
prayed for, and supported me.

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I started to see group 
a little differently.

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In fact, the temperature of our group 
began to change in the best possible way.

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We started connecting 
and hanging out outside of Tuesday nights.

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I began to regularly check in 
with a few of the guys.

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I was even a groomsman 
at one of their weddings.

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I eventually came to realize that
the problem was never my group. It was me.

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So in each group I've been in since that
one, I decided to do things differently.

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I decided to give it more effort. 
I tried to get to know everyone.

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I tried to remember 
what was going on and ask about it.

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I sent a text to one of the guys when he
had a big client presentation coming up.

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We all helped when one of them 
injured his knee and couldn't get around.

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I stopped viewing group 
as just something I did on Tuesday nights.

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I spoke up during discussion 
because I actually studied this time.

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And we talked about real stuff.

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By walking alongside them, I saw firsthand
what God was doing in their lives.

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And you know what? That helped me 
see what God was doing in my own life.

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It was a way more 
worthwhile group experience

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because I started 
taking personal ownership.

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It made all the difference for me.
It'll do the same for you.

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I'm not the only one
who has learned this.

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We've seen it happen repeatedly. Ownership
is pivotal to a great group experience.

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So, we want you to own your group 
experience and own your spiritual growth.

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Owning your group experience includes 
all the things I got wrong the first time

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and all the things 
I got right the second time.

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It means making group a priority. Be
engaged, take snacks, volunteer to host.

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Get to know each other better,
even outside of group.

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Those seem like small things, but they
create a space for life change to happen.

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As Andy said in the first session,
there are things that happen in a circle

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that can never happen 
in a row on Sunday morning.

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When great things happen like when
someone gets a new job or has a baby,

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or when hard times happen...

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When someone gets a scary diagnosis
or hits hard times financially.

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Those things don't come up 
in a Sunday church service.

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When you're in a circle, you have 
a chance to be there for each other.

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To take dinner, send texts, 
and offer support

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because you know 
what's happening in each other's lives.

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Getting involved is what 
owning your group experience looks like.

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It will take time and effort, and it may
be awkward at first, but it's worth it.

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If you make the effort, 
I think you'll find the same thing I did.

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Your group experience 
will be so much more worthwhile.

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The other piece of ownership
is owning your spiritual growth.

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Here's the bad news:
no one can do this for you.

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Here's the good news: no one can do this
for you. You own your spiritual growth.

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Your group members and leader 
will encourage and support you,

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but the growth you experience 
doesn't depend solely on you,

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on how well 
everything goes with everyone else,

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how smart your leader is, 
or even the studies you use.

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Remember, spiritual growth 
is a growing faith in God

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validated by a growing love 
for God and others.

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Spiritual growth will come from
identifying and taking next steps

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with the help of your group.

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When I opened up to my group about what
would've been more comfortable to hide,

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they were able to step into it with me.

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They gave me advice, 
held me accountable,

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and pointed out that the circumstance
really could grow my faith.

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You know what? It did! The relationships 
in my group have helped me to grow.

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And I've been able to help others, too.

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I've watched guys admit and conquer
something they've been struggling with.

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I've listened as someone figured out
how to be a Christian at a ruthless job.

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I've even seen a couple 
celebrate an answered prayer

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and welcome home a new baby.

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The crazy thing is helping other people 
grow their faith grows yours, too.

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I think that was 
part of God's design for us.

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It's why we're so glad 
you have taken the step into community.

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The relationships in your group may be new
but they are intentional relationships.

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You each chose to be a part of this group.

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Make the most of that choice

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by really owning your group experience
and your spiritual growth.

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I didn't realize it back then, 
but the spiritual growth I missed out on

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in my first group experience 
wasn't my group's fault.

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It had nothing to do with our leader.
It was on me.

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I was encouraged to show up, 
join in, and be real.

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I showed up most of the time,
but I never really joined in.

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I never really risked being real.

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Now that I've started doing those things,
I see the benefits

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and truly understood why 
life is really better connected.

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Taking ownership can make 
all the difference for you.

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Owning your group experience 
starts with some pretty small steps,

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like taking snacks 
or hosting group at your house.

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In today's discussion, 
you'll have the chance

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to think about the specific ways 
you'd like to be involved.

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Your group may even want 
to start dividing up some of these tasks.

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Think about what you're good at 
or passionate about, then volunteer.

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A piece of your discussion
will also revolve around

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what we like to call 
"The Group Agreement".

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If you're going to own 
this group experience together,

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it's important that you're 
all on the same page

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about the purpose of the group, when you 
meet, and what happens at those meetings.

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Clear expectations are key 
to starting your group well.

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And "The Group Agreement" 
will help you do that.

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In your group, you can expect 
to see the same people every week.

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It's important 
not to add anyone to the group,

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or take guests 
without everyone agreeing on it first.

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If group is a revolving door of people 
you don't know, it's harder to be real.

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We're not trying to be closed off 
to others joining the group,

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but we are trying to build a community 
based on authentic relationships.

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Another important aspect of the agreement 
is setting an end date for your group.

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It's important to have an end date

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so you all know how long 
you're committing to this group.

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These are just a couple of examples of 
expectations you'll walk through together.

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Since the whole point of your discussion 
is to get everyone on the same page,

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your leader will walk the group 
through "The Group Agreement".

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If you disagree with something, 
ask to discuss it more.

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Listen to others' perspectives 
and offer your own.

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Make sure that, by the time 
you finish the conversation,

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you're all in agreement about the who, 
what, when, where, and why of your group.

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Now that we've come 
to the end of this study,

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we are so thankful that 
you have chosen to join this group.

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We believe circles 
really are better than rows

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because this circle 
and these people

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have the potential 
to become a real community.

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One that supports and encourages you 
as your relationship with Jesus grows.

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Thank you for letting us 
help you to circle up.