1
00:00:01,540 --> 00:00:04,730
Let me tell you a story,
where you'll meet the characters

2
00:00:04,730 --> 00:00:07,993
who I'll call Bilal and Brenda.

3
00:00:08,910 --> 00:00:12,060
I was working in a most
remarkable part of the world.

4
00:00:12,060 --> 00:00:14,790
And one unremarkable morning,

5
00:00:14,790 --> 00:00:17,103
a colleague came to see me.

6
00:00:17,570 --> 00:00:21,350
She told me that Bilal,
one of our senior executives,

7
00:00:21,350 --> 00:00:24,760
had been telling everyone
I was being removed

8
00:00:24,760 --> 00:00:27,240
because I'd been messing
with the wrong people.

9
00:00:27,240 --> 00:00:30,077
And now, I was going to
face the consequences.

10
00:00:30,560 --> 00:00:32,200
I wasn't alarmed,

11
00:00:32,200 --> 00:00:36,140
because I knew I had done
what I'd been hired to do:

12
00:00:36,140 --> 00:00:37,800
my job,

13
00:00:37,800 --> 00:00:40,200
dealing with thorny issues head on

14
00:00:40,200 --> 00:00:43,260
and leaving no stone unturned.

15
00:00:43,260 --> 00:00:45,920
In fact, in the months prior to this,

16
00:00:45,920 --> 00:00:48,910
we'd overturned more
than just a few stones.

17
00:00:48,910 --> 00:00:51,993
Those details are for another time.

18
00:00:52,770 --> 00:00:54,670
I called my husband, James,

19
00:00:54,670 --> 00:00:57,930
to tell him about
this bizarre conversation,

20
00:00:57,930 --> 00:01:00,720
and with what proved
to be great foresight,

21
00:01:00,720 --> 00:01:05,797
he said, "Angelique, pack your things
and call Brenda, in not order."

22
00:01:06,620 --> 00:01:08,170
I called Brenda.

23
00:01:08,170 --> 00:01:10,300
I'd worked with her for a number of years,

24
00:01:10,300 --> 00:01:12,120
and I trusted her.

25
00:01:12,120 --> 00:01:15,383
She was the person who'd
recommended me for that job.

26
00:01:15,910 --> 00:01:17,350
I cut to the chase,

27
00:01:17,350 --> 00:01:20,470
because my husband's reaction
made me realize

28
00:01:20,470 --> 00:01:24,653
this was more than just the usual stuff
I'd encountered before.

29
00:01:25,030 --> 00:01:29,330
And I say usual,
but in that moment of clarity,

30
00:01:29,330 --> 00:01:33,510
it dawned on me what James
had already recognized:

31
00:01:33,510 --> 00:01:35,713
none of this was usual.

32
00:01:36,520 --> 00:01:41,330
These irregularities,
part of a pattern I'd failed to notice,

33
00:01:41,330 --> 00:01:44,600
were what I now know as open secrets

34
00:01:44,600 --> 00:01:49,400
living beneath those proverbial stones
I'd had the audacity to overturn.

35
00:01:50,520 --> 00:01:54,430
To my shock, I learned
that this was happening

36
00:01:54,430 --> 00:01:58,940
because I hadn't tried hard enough
to operate in the "gray space."

37
00:01:59,620 --> 00:02:04,650
I didn't seem to know when
to kick things into the long grass.

38
00:02:04,650 --> 00:02:09,090
And I didn't understand
that this was how the system worked.

39
00:02:09,810 --> 00:02:12,573
The message, the implied threat,

40
00:02:12,573 --> 00:02:14,103
was clear.

41
00:02:15,570 --> 00:02:17,470
Over the next few weeks,

42
00:02:17,470 --> 00:02:22,280
I was replaced by a convenient yes-man
while I was still there.

43
00:02:22,950 --> 00:02:25,463
I suffered from terrible gastritis,

44
00:02:25,680 --> 00:02:28,680
and I pretended
to our two young daughters

45
00:02:28,680 --> 00:02:30,585
that I still had that job.

46
00:02:31,210 --> 00:02:35,400
Leaving home every morning,
dressed up as if for work,

47
00:02:35,400 --> 00:02:39,273
to drop them to school, for six months.

48
00:02:40,650 --> 00:02:42,613
I did not submit,

49
00:02:43,250 --> 00:02:46,310
but I won't pretend
that it was easy to speak up

50
00:02:46,310 --> 00:02:51,250
or beneficial in any way to me,
to my family or to my career.

51
00:02:52,040 --> 00:02:56,660
When we speak up in the workplace
despite policies to the contrary,

52
00:02:56,660 --> 00:02:59,000
whilst we may not lose our jobs,

53
00:02:59,000 --> 00:03:03,320
we are likely to lose
the comradery of our coworkers.

54
00:03:03,320 --> 00:03:06,000
Disbelieved, ostracized,

55
00:03:06,000 --> 00:03:08,510
faced with under-the-radar bullying.

56
00:03:08,510 --> 00:03:12,520
You know the kind when you walk
into a room and everyone stops talking?

57
00:03:12,920 --> 00:03:17,573
We think: It's not my
responsibility to say anything.

58
00:03:18,800 --> 00:03:24,060
So why did I choose to act
despite the risks to my family and to me?

59
00:03:24,980 --> 00:03:30,250
The sin of omission is a failure
to do what you knew is right.

60
00:03:31,090 --> 00:03:32,920
When you stay quiet,

61
00:03:32,920 --> 00:03:36,220
even though you're not guilty
of wrongdoing yourself,

62
00:03:36,220 --> 00:03:40,263
what will you have to live with
if you don't take action?

63
00:03:40,980 --> 00:03:44,620
So who are you in this lineup of actors?

64
00:03:44,620 --> 00:03:47,490
The bad actor, the wrongdoer,

65
00:03:47,490 --> 00:03:51,970
the bad stander who benefits
directly or indirectly

66
00:03:51,970 --> 00:03:55,060
and acts as a puppet for the bad actor?

67
00:03:55,060 --> 00:03:58,350
The bystander, aware of the open secrets,

68
00:03:58,350 --> 00:04:02,320
but not actually doing anything
wrong or the upstander?

69
00:04:02,320 --> 00:04:05,890
This is the person we want to see
when we look in the mirror.

70
00:04:06,670 --> 00:04:08,960
I've learned three things:

71
00:04:08,960 --> 00:04:12,690
One, don't second guess yourself.

72
00:04:12,690 --> 00:04:16,480
When you see something
amiss, ask questions,

73
00:04:16,480 --> 00:04:20,123
because it is okay
to challenge those in authority.

74
00:04:20,710 --> 00:04:24,160
Two, don't be complicit.

75
00:04:24,160 --> 00:04:29,410
You always have the power to say no
in the face of wrongdoing.

76
00:04:29,410 --> 00:04:33,040
And three, be an upstander.

77
00:04:33,040 --> 00:04:37,583
Speaking up is not about being brave.

78
00:04:37,583 --> 00:04:40,513
It's not about not feeling scared.

79
00:04:40,840 --> 00:04:45,900
But when you do what you know is right,
you can be at peace with yourself.

80
00:04:46,300 --> 00:04:51,190
Yes, it is hard to see
what you feel in the moment.

81
00:04:51,190 --> 00:04:54,230
Do it anyway. Be fearless.

82
00:04:54,740 --> 00:04:56,547
Martin Luther King said,

83
00:04:56,547 --> 00:05:01,207
"In the end, we will remember
not the words of our enemies,

84
00:05:01,207 --> 00:05:04,350
but the silence of our friends."

85
00:05:04,350 --> 00:05:06,593
So when you look in the mirror,

86
00:05:06,910 --> 00:05:08,623
who will you see?

87
00:05:09,040 --> 00:05:12,700
A bystander, keeper of open secrets?

88
00:05:12,700 --> 00:05:16,573
Or will the person looking
back at you be an upstander.

89
00:05:16,794 --> 00:05:18,961
I know who I see.

90
00:05:19,157 --> 00:05:21,643
I know who my daughters see.

91
00:05:21,970 --> 00:05:24,513
The choice is yours.