0:00:00.000,0:00:03.868
Stretch and cough as loud as you like now.
0:00:03.868,0:00:05.742
You're not going to disturb anybody.
0:00:05.742,0:00:10.921
Scratch knees, move your legs, move your bum.
0:00:10.921,0:00:17.747
Get yourselves comfortable for the next[br]part of this evening's festivities.
0:00:20.837,0:00:26.856
The Dhamma talk.
0:00:49.608,0:00:56.979
Excellent. So for this evening's Dhamma talk[br]I had all sorts of ideas what I was
0:00:56.979,0:01:00.239
going to speak about,[br]actually not many of them,
0:01:00.239,0:01:02.996
but it's quite obvious what I should speak about tonight,
0:01:02.996,0:01:07.326
because it's a problem which is common to so many
0:01:07.326,0:01:17.652
people and I've just been feeling it and[br]overcoming it though this meditation: tiredness.
0:01:17.652,0:01:22.526
Now, 3, 4, 5 years ago,[br]I cannot remember when,
0:01:22.526,0:01:27.481
that's the trouble with living in the[br]present moment, as a monk we don't get
0:01:27.481,0:01:32.733
dementia, we just get[br]living-in-the-present-momentness
0:01:32.733,0:01:37.609
[laughts] so we don't really think too[br]much about past and future.
0:01:37.609,0:01:40.804
So other people say - when did that happen?[br]"In the past somewhere"
0:01:40.804,0:01:44.139
we don't exactly remember when,[br]and it's not as if you don't want
0:01:44.139,0:01:49.500
to remember, it's just the efficiency of[br]the brain and living in this moment
0:01:49.500,0:01:52.806
rather than always living in that past.
0:01:52.806,0:01:58.977
But a few years ago when I was teaching overseas as I often do,
0:01:58.977,0:02:05.772
I was invited to spend the day at a[br]youth seminar in Kuala Lumpur,
0:02:05.772,0:02:12.491
it's a very interesting occassion,[br]about 400-500 young people 15-25,
0:02:12.491,0:02:16.548
doing all sorts of interesting stuff,[br]one of the things they were doing
0:02:16.548,0:02:24.078
is that they asked all the people there,[br]what is your most difficult emotion
0:02:24.078,0:02:32.322
as 15-25 year old, mostly Chinese[br]Buddhists over in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia.
0:02:32.322,0:02:35.818
What do you find most difficult of all[br]in life?
0:02:35.818,0:02:42.784
And the answer which came up was tiredness.[br]I never expected that before,
0:02:42.784,0:02:47.682
but once they said that it was[br]quite obvious why people are tired even
0:02:47.682,0:02:55.316
when they are in the late teen years, 15 to 25.[br]You can remember your time as a
0:02:55.316,0:03:00.178
young man, a young woman, the pressure[br]is really on you.
0:03:00.178,0:03:04.911
You have to do well at school,[br]your parents and teachers and
0:03:04.911,0:03:09.220
friends say it's really important,[br]so you have to do really well at homework
0:03:09.220,0:03:11.286
and get good grades.
0:03:11.286,0:03:16.646
That's one of the problems with young people,[br]parents tell me off for this,
0:03:16.646,0:03:19.305
but I'm supporting young people, it doesn't matter so much what
0:03:19.305,0:03:22.334
grades you get at school.
0:03:22.334,0:03:26.384
People have found, Daniel Goldman,[br]emotional intelligence, found out
0:03:26.384,0:03:30.547
that the grades you get at school and[br]University, all those certificates,
0:03:30.547,0:03:35.569
they don't really count for much when it[br]comes to success in life.
0:03:35.569,0:03:39.425
Success is not guaranteed by doing[br]well at school. Something else is.
0:03:39.425,0:03:44.554
That's why I was telling people just yesterday,[br]in Singapore, came though there
0:03:44.554,0:03:48.668
on the way back from Thailand,
0:03:48.668,0:03:57.895
that if ever your kids get an "F" at school,[br]did they ever work out what "F" means?
0:03:57.895,0:04:04.376
I was a schoolteacher.[br]"F" means Fantastic. [laughter]
0:04:04.376,0:04:07.857
If they get an "E" that means Excellent.
0:04:07.857,0:04:11.305
But if they get an "A" that means Arrogant.[br][laughter]
0:04:11.305,0:04:15.044
All these people getting so proud of getting[br]As and straight As, they really are
0:04:15.044,0:04:19.980
a pain in the butt, aren't they.[br]So full on themselves, "I got straight As..."
0:04:19.980,0:04:26.594
So I prefer the Fs, the Fantastics.[br]The Excellents.
0:04:26.594,0:04:35.410
Because it's not so much the pressure on succeeding in that
0:04:35.410,0:04:40.973
competition to get good grades, or to get[br]a place in a good university,
0:04:40.973,0:04:45.356
look at me, I got a place at one of the[br]best universities, and what happened
0:04:45.356,0:04:50.065
to me, didn't do me any good going to[br]Cambridge, I might as well have
0:04:50.065,0:04:54.227
gone to any old college, even no[br]college at all.
0:04:54.227,0:04:58.641
Actually, if I hadn't gone to Cambridge,[br]I'd probably have become a monk even earlier.
0:04:58.641,0:05:01.503
That would've been good,[br]but anyway, this is just what happens
0:05:01.503,0:05:03.701
in life, but you learn something there.
0:05:03.701,0:05:12.669
On that subject, I like rambling,[br]one of the important events in my life
0:05:12.669,0:05:17.484
as a student which turned me more towards[br]being a monk rather than being an academic.
0:05:17.484,0:05:21.898
At the time I didn't realise its[br]importance but when you look
0:05:21.898,0:05:28.858
back and you find these are the crucial[br]experiences which direct you in life,
0:05:28.858,0:05:35.297
and that was when, I was a Buddhist at[br]university, I had a few other Buddhists,
0:05:35.297,0:05:40.773
but one of my best friends was a Christian,[br]a very strong pracitising Christian,
0:05:40.773,0:05:46.544
he became a hippy later in life,[br]but anyway he was a really strong Christian.
0:05:46.544,0:05:53.029
And he told me one day that together with[br]a couple of his friends in Bible Study class
0:05:53.029,0:06:00.282
they'd started to volunteer once a week[br]to go to the local hospital for those who had
0:06:00.282,0:06:04.913
mental disabilities and volunteer.
0:06:04.913,0:06:09.523
And when he told me that I didn't want to go, but I felt
0:06:09.523,0:06:15.142
if I didn't go I was letting down the team, [br]Buddhism. So the only reason I
0:06:15.142,0:06:21.637
volunteered to go was just ego, just pride,[br]"if the Christians can do it,
0:06:21.637,0:06:26.359
the Buddhists can do it as well!"[br]That's what it was.
0:06:26.359,0:06:31.024
I'm being quite honest - I just went there[br]because he was going there, so I had to go there.
0:06:31.024,0:06:34.339
But a strange thing happened![br]Like many things in life,
0:06:34.339,0:06:39.229
you go and do something for one reason,[br]you find other reasons start to become
0:06:39.229,0:06:44.306
predominant and it really changes your life.[br]Because those Christians, they went for
0:06:44.306,0:06:49.292
two or three weeks and then dropped out.[br]I went there for two years.
0:06:49.292,0:06:55.324
Every afternoon when I was up in[br]Cambridge and I would re-arrange
0:06:55.324,0:07:02.300
tutorials and everything so I could go there.[br]I loved it and I wondered why,
0:07:02.300,0:07:10.692
why did I enjoy going there?[br]I was helping out in the occupational therapy unit
0:07:10.692,0:07:16.450
for those people with Down's Syndrome.[br]It was incredible to see the emotional intelligence
0:07:16.450,0:07:20.488
those kids had, not kids, young men, young women.
0:07:20.488,0:07:25.628
Even though I never knew the words "emotional intelligence"
0:07:25.628,0:07:30.328
this was in 1969-1971 or something, still, they were just so sensitive
0:07:30.328,0:07:36.832
to a world I hadn't really been trained in.[br]And I always remember, on a couple of occasions,
0:07:36.832,0:07:43.988
I was a young man, you'd split up with your girlfriend, you'd go there and they'd pick it up straight away!
0:07:43.988,0:07:49.075
I wouldn't need to tell them, they'd come running out and give me a hug. "Why are you doing that?"
0:07:49.075,0:07:53.646
"There is something wrong isn't there?"[br]"How the heck do you know that?"
0:07:53.646,0:07:57.922
And they were just so sensitive to my feelings,[br]they got to know me and love me.
0:07:57.922,0:08:05.718
And they had this incredible emotional sensitivity.[br]And when I was sitting next to Nobel laureates,
0:08:05.718,0:08:14.036
which I did in a place like that, they were socially so insensitive, they hadn't got an emotional neuron
0:08:14.036,0:08:18.582
in their brains. Well they did, I'm exaggerating there.
0:08:18.582,0:08:21.582
But when it came to the professors of life,
0:08:21.582,0:08:29.351
I preferred to spend the afternoon with people with Down's Syndrome. I learnt much more from them.
0:08:29.351,0:08:35.890
And I grew much more from them. I had to empathise with people. When you're with professors, or lecturers
0:08:35.890,0:08:44.439
or even your friends, they were all talking, ah...the word is... "gomayan" [?]
0:08:44.439,0:08:48.039
it takes me a long while to say, it's the Pali word for bullshit.
0:08:48.039,0:08:54.905
You know all in their head, no idea[br]of their feelings. The boys and the girls couldn't
0:08:54.905,0:09:02.330
understand how to get on with each other, just all fantasies and dreams and ideas and
0:09:02.330,0:09:11.864
philosophies. You go with these people with[br]Down's Syndrome, and they felt, they knew the emotions.
0:09:11.864,0:09:18.585
They couldn't do well at school, they were terrible at things like maths, but when it came to being able
0:09:18.585,0:09:25.617
to feel what you're feeling and actually be kind to you, they were geniuses. And it came to the point I'd
0:09:25.617,0:09:33.913
rather spend the afternoon with those people than with professors. I didn't know why at the time but
0:09:33.913,0:09:40.225
it would actually encourage me in another area of life, this great emotional intelligence.
0:09:40.225,0:09:45.592
It's because we're not sensitive to that inner world[br]of emotions, we keep thinking too much,
0:09:45.592,0:09:51.225
doing too much, it's one of the reasons why we're tired.[br]But anyway, these young kids I saw,
0:09:51.225,0:09:56.948
that was their biggest problem in life.[br]And once they told me that, told everybody,
0:09:56.948,0:10:04.516
they opened up huge areas of improving[br]our lives both physically and emotionally,
0:10:04.516,0:10:07.707
and with relations as well.
0:10:07.707,0:10:14.239
How many of you when you come home[br]from work are grumpy?
0:10:14.239,0:10:21.104
Even angry? So many people keep asking me:[br]"My husband is in such a bad mood
0:10:21.104,0:10:26.232
every time, he's always shouting at the kids,[br]he's a terrible pain in the neck to live with.
0:10:26.232,0:10:30.983
Why? Can you get him some anger management counselling or something?"
0:10:30.983,0:10:35.151
I basically say, well teach him how to sleep at night.
0:10:35.151,0:10:41.390
Teach him how to have a good rest.[br]See if he can overcome that tiredness
0:10:41.390,0:10:45.847
which is so deeply embedded in our[br]humanity today.
0:10:45.847,0:10:52.512
I'm only saying this because this is how I[br]understand things, there is no research
0:10:52.512,0:10:57.383
to back me up here, but I'm sure that if[br]people did that research they'd probably
0:10:57.383,0:11:05.116
discover what I know, and that is that[br]it's tiredness that creates so many divorces,
0:11:05.116,0:11:09.963
so many relationships would break up[br]because of tiredness.
0:11:09.963,0:11:14.649
And sicknesses such as cancers,[br]heart disease, because of tiredness.
0:11:14.649,0:11:19.479
And even other things, an obvious[br]sickness which is very prevalent today
0:11:19.479,0:11:27.779
is depression - a very deep tiredness.[br]It's such an obvious thing that there's
0:11:27.779,0:11:33.566
a big problem in this world.[br]Maybe you've had times of tiredness
0:11:33.566,0:11:38.345
it's as if the world is too heavy to[br]bear any longer.
0:11:38.345,0:11:45.794
You really have to push so hard just to get by,[br]the struggle takes so much energy,
0:11:45.794,0:11:52.542
and at times you have no more energy to give,[br]you go into this hole of depression,
0:11:52.542,0:11:59.173
just absolutely low energy, nothing to give[br]to anything, can't even get out of bed sometimes.
0:11:59.173,0:12:03.916
Then you want to get out of bed,[br]don't want to eat or do anything.
0:12:03.916,0:12:09.108
Simply because you've got absolutely no energy at all,[br]you are deeply tired.
0:12:09.108,0:12:14.824
We now have chronic fatigue syndrome.[br]I don't remember that when I was a kid.
0:12:14.824,0:12:21.941
Why is that? Of course obviously, that[br]is a problem, tiredness, and the reason is
0:12:21.941,0:12:25.211
because we have so much to do[br]in this world.
0:12:25.211,0:12:29.414
The reason I'm rushing off after this talk is[br]because there's a monk
0:12:29.414,0:12:35.263
Bhante Gunaratana, a very famous monk,[br]a really nice monk, he's been here before,
0:12:35.263,0:12:40.940
he's 88, and he was supposed to come and teach a meditation retreat at Jhana Grove this weekend.
0:12:40.940,0:12:45.400
When we heard he was here we moved[br]Heaven and Earth to try to get him to come here
0:12:45.400,0:12:51.619
to get the retreat free for that weekend[br]and advertise it, buy him the airline tickets.
0:12:51.619,0:12:56.555
But then he got too sick.[br]So his doctor said no, you can't come.
0:12:56.555,0:13:02.096
So where does the buck stop?[br]At the top - so I've got to teach
0:13:02.096,0:13:07.658
the retreat in his place.[br]I should be relaxing this weekend,
0:13:07.658,0:13:11.089
I've just been on a long trip to Thailand[br]teaching so many hours.
0:13:11.089,0:13:16.451
And on Monday morning I'm off again[br]to Korea to teach there.
0:13:16.451,0:13:21.457
This should be a rest for me.[br]So I am tired.
0:13:21.457,0:13:26.313
But I could be exhaused but there[br]is another thing which I know,
0:13:26.313,0:13:29.619
what happens when you've been[br]a meditator monk for so many years,
0:13:29.619,0:13:34.426
how to deal with that tiredness,[br]so it doesn't cause you depression, irritation,
0:13:34.426,0:13:40.001
anger, all these other emotional and physical[br]sicknesses.
0:13:40.001,0:13:47.168
How do we deal with tiredness in this world?[br]We have to do much more than maybe our ancestors did.
0:13:47.168,0:13:56.652
So how do we deal with that tiredness?[br]One - if you're tired you can't afford to worry about the future.
0:13:56.652,0:14:04.384
You haven't got any spare energy to waste.[br]So sometimes when I'm very busy I refuse
0:14:04.384,0:14:11.586
to look at my calendar. If I looked at my calendar,[br]"whoa" no one could ever do that.
0:14:11.586,0:14:14.617
Some of the other monks look at it,[br]"how do you do that Ajahn Brahm?"
0:14:14.617,0:14:16.610
"Because I don't look at it."
0:14:16.610,0:14:20.266
You do live in the present moment,[br]because how much energy do you waste
0:14:20.266,0:14:26.074
worrying that you will not be able to cope?
0:14:26.074,0:14:31.484
I never do that because I know[br]just how that is going to be awful.
0:14:31.484,0:14:37.954
I told one of the monks today, because I was just[br]really exhausted, I remember a time when I
0:14:37.954,0:14:43.311
was a young monk in Thailand, wondering around from monastery to monastery, having a great sense of freedom
0:14:43.311,0:14:51.101
but on this occasion I'd been travelling all day[br]from just after lunch, our lunch is about 9:00
0:14:51.101,0:14:59.106
and that's it for the day, and then travelling all day[br]in hot weather, I was in a Thai bus, not like the
0:14:59.106,0:15:06.010
Thai buses these days, Thai buses these days are[br]fantastic - people say what are you talking about.
0:15:06.010,0:15:16.232
I've been there, it's not fantastic, this was 40 years ago,[br]and this really hot and cramped small seat for two,
0:15:16.232,0:15:22.400
and there's usually three in there plus a chicken[br]or pig or something else, I don't know what else,
0:15:22.400,0:15:27.890
cramped up for hours after hours after hours,[br]and finally got to this monastery where I was
0:15:27.890,0:15:35.817
supposed to be going to, I rememer the time, 5:45[br]in the evening and checked-in, there was two monks there,
0:15:35.817,0:15:42.236
"Welcome, you can stay here but you've got[br]15 minutes to take a quick bath because at 6:00
0:15:42.236,0:15:48.964
we all have to meditate for 4 hours, no moving."
0:15:48.964,0:15:55.695
"What?! I've been on the road all day, I'm tired,[br]I'm not going to be able to handle that!"
0:15:55.695,0:16:04.656
But...the wisdom of my practice kicked in,[br]I think I've said this a couple of weeks ago,
0:16:04.656,0:16:10.269
the story of moving the wheelbarrows of earth,[br]if you haven't heard that story it's in
0:16:10.269,0:16:14.594
Opening the Door of Your Heart,[br]one of the first books which I wrote,
0:16:14.594,0:16:18.889
It's a story of how as a young monk[br]I have to move earth from
0:16:18.889,0:16:22.681
9 o'clock in the morning to 9 o'clock in the evening[br]for 3 days because my teacher wanted
0:16:22.681,0:16:29.675
it to be moved. It's really hard work,[br]really heavy labour, but you don't mind.
0:16:29.675,0:16:37.149
I was fit and healthy, I'm fit and healthy now.[br]It finished, and that night Ajahn Chah went
0:16:37.149,0:16:43.025
to another monastery and the second monk,[br]he's the head monk now, said,
0:16:43.025,0:16:49.051
"You put it in the wrong place, move it."[br]Another 3 days of hard work.
0:16:49.051,0:16:54.852
I can handle that..but you get very dirty,[br]and just sweaty, and mosquitos,
0:16:54.852,0:16:59.317
you got both hands on the wheelbarrow,[br]you can't keep the
0:16:59.317,0:17:01.893
misquitos off you, you're sweating, and oh the
0:17:01.893,0:17:04.704
mosquitos they really have a great lunch
0:17:04.704,0:17:07.552
when you're working like that, so after
0:17:07.552,0:17:10.829
6 days, finished at last.
0:17:10.829,0:17:13.689
That night my master Ajahn Chah
0:17:13.689,0:17:16.511
came back and the following morning said,
0:17:16.511,0:17:19.803
"Why have you moved the earth over there?
0:17:19.803,0:17:22.720
I thought I told you to move it in that other spot.
0:17:22.720,0:17:28.135
MOVE IT!" Another 3 days of hard physical labour.
0:17:28.135,0:17:31.701
In the mosquito-ridden sweaty jungles.
0:17:31.701,0:17:33.989
Those people who worked for the Japanese in
0:17:33.989,0:17:37.149
the Second World War, I know what they felt like.
0:17:37.149,0:17:39.937
Honesty. Really hard work, actually, they were,
0:17:39.937,0:17:42.284
we were malnourished as well.
0:17:42.284,0:17:44.467
You should see photos of me in those days,
0:17:44.467,0:17:47.270
nothing like now, you wouldn't recognise me, honestly
0:17:47.270,0:17:49.143
from what I look like today.
0:17:49.143,0:17:52.848
Being a bit fat today is just balancing what I did
0:17:52.848,0:17:56.511
when I was young, it's fair. [laughs]
0:17:56.511,0:17:59.428
Anyway, really hard work, and when it came to
0:17:59.428,0:18:02.291
the next day, 6 days already passed and
0:18:02.291,0:18:05.126
3 more days of hard work were in front of me,
0:18:05.126,0:18:10.186
I started complaining. I was exhausted, tired, had enough.
0:18:10.186,0:18:13.721
I complained, I always say, it was great in those
0:18:13.721,0:18:17.177
days because there were hardly any other[br]Westerners there.
0:18:17.177,0:18:19.787
Just working with the Thai monks and the
0:18:19.787,0:18:23.854
Laotian monks, so you could swear in English.
0:18:23.854,0:18:26.638
I thought no-one would understand you.
0:18:26.638,0:18:30.473
But even though they never understood any English
0:18:30.473,0:18:32.720
just they could pick up your body language,
0:18:32.720,0:18:34.655
you were really suffering.
0:18:34.655,0:18:36.438
And that was when one of the monks,
0:18:36.438,0:18:39.312
I forget who it was, but whoever you are,
0:18:39.312,0:18:41.895
thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you,
0:18:41.895,0:18:44.739
for what you taught me because he said to me,
0:18:44.739,0:18:48.348
"pushing the wheelbarrow is easy,
0:18:48.348,0:18:52.794
thinking about it is the hard part."
0:18:52.794,0:18:55.321
He got me, he nailed me.
0:18:55.321,0:18:57.977
I was thinking about it, that was the hard part of
0:18:57.977,0:19:01.427
pushing a wheelbarrow for another three days.
0:19:01.427,0:19:05.428
Doing it is easy, and so, thank you, thank you, thank you,
0:19:05.428,0:19:09.242
I stopped thinking about it and it became fun again.
0:19:09.242,0:19:11.711
We had races with the other monks, who'd get there first.
0:19:11.711,0:19:15.625
You know, your turn to go on the shovel,
0:19:15.625,0:19:18.342
putting earth into the wheelbarrow,
0:19:18.342,0:19:21.467
oh sorry, did I throw it a bit hard?
0:19:21.467,0:19:24.392
Oh sorry. On purpose of cause.
0:19:24.392,0:19:27.202
Just having fun and games, messing around.
0:19:27.202,0:19:33.652
But anyway, I am pretty playful.
0:19:33.652,0:19:37.907
I went to a conference in Vietnam a couple of years ago,
0:19:37.907,0:19:42.022
and if you go to conferences, big organised conferences,
0:19:42.022,0:19:45.261
the organisers want you to see some of the sights.
0:19:45.261,0:19:48.266
I don't like being a tourist but you had no choice.
0:19:48.266,0:19:52.602
So I was in the middle of Vietnam somewhere,
0:19:52.602,0:19:56.615
to these lakes and underground tunnels and stuff,
0:19:56.615,0:19:58.415
where you go through in a barge,
0:19:58.415,0:20:02.885
fascinating beautiful place but on the way back...
0:20:02.885,0:20:10.151
Actually, weird, I was representing Singapore,
0:20:10.151,0:20:13.569
not Australia, so I was in the Singapore boat
0:20:13.569,0:20:15.726
and there was another Singapore boat,
0:20:15.726,0:20:17.903
we had the Theravada monks in our boat,
0:20:17.903,0:20:20.740
and the Mahayana monks in the other boat,
0:20:20.740,0:20:22.427
so I looked at them and said
0:20:22.427,0:20:25.710
"Right, a race, who's better, the Mahayana or the
0:20:25.710,0:20:28.501
Theravada? [laughter]. Those are the two parts
0:20:28.501,0:20:30.139
of Buddhist so we had a race between
0:20:30.139,0:20:32.678
Mahayana and Theravada. I was in the Theravada
0:20:32.678,0:20:35.657
boat paddling for all I could and the Mahayana
0:20:35.657,0:20:38.265
monks were paddling really hard as well just to
0:20:38.265,0:20:40.207
see who would win, and of course it's obvious,
0:20:40.207,0:20:43.532
the Theravada would win, it's obvious,
0:20:43.532,0:20:45.316
if you know anything about Buddhism,
0:20:45.316,0:20:47.823
because the Mahayana, they are Boddhisatvas,
0:20:47.823,0:20:49.627
they even let other people get to Enlightenment
0:20:49.627,0:20:51.907
before they do, so they made us get to the
0:20:51.907,0:20:56.196
finishing line before they did, that's their tradition [laughter].
0:20:56.196,0:20:59.978
Just playing around. Monks have a lot of fun.
0:20:59.978,0:21:03.858
We do really stupid things sometimes but it's good fun.
0:21:03.858,0:21:08.031
Religion can be far too serious and I just really
0:21:08.031,0:21:10.387
rebel against serious religion.
0:21:10.387,0:21:13.443
But anyway, this was where I learnt
0:21:13.443,0:21:17.866
how to have fun, because I was exhausted
0:21:17.866,0:21:19.710
moving those wheelbarrows but
0:21:19.710,0:21:23.527
instead of thinking about it I just did it.
0:21:23.527,0:21:26.171
And all the tiredness vanished.
0:21:26.171,0:21:28.113
It's like this evening,
0:21:28.113,0:21:31.039
all the tiredness vanishes when you[br]stop thinking about it.
0:21:31.039,0:21:33.416
Thinking about the future, worrying about it,
0:21:33.416,0:21:38.709
because most of your energy gets wasted in thinking.
0:21:38.709,0:21:41.492
If you are tired, if you've had a really busy day,
0:21:41.492,0:21:45.854
for goodness sake, you can't afford to think!
0:21:45.854,0:21:49.325
And complain...and worry... and get afraid..
0:21:49.325,0:21:51.286
and plan this..and plan that...
0:21:51.286,0:21:55.015
Your brain is exhausted, give it a break!
0:21:55.015,0:21:57.516
But what do people do when they're tired,
0:21:57.516,0:22:00.852
they get grumpy, they don't know how just to be.
0:22:00.852,0:22:03.150
They always tend to think too much
0:22:03.150,0:22:08.129
and that is the most important reason why people are tired.
0:22:08.129,0:22:12.645
Thinking way too much rather than just doing it.
0:22:12.645,0:22:15.425
I don't know what you're going to do this weekend
0:22:15.425,0:22:18.254
so don't just think about it, just do it.
0:22:18.254,0:22:19.801
Tell that to your husband who has to clean out
0:22:19.801,0:22:21.637
the garaga - "I'm busy"
0:22:21.637,0:22:26.824
Say, "don't think about it husband, just do it" [laughter]
0:22:26.824,0:22:29.664
You've got to go and have a biopsy.
0:22:29.664,0:22:32.792
Don't just think about it because you get
0:22:32.792,0:22:36.861
really exhausted thinking "oh.....is it cancer? I'm going to die.."
0:22:36.861,0:22:38.690
Don't just think about it, just do it.
0:22:38.690,0:22:43.483
Even dying itself, dying is okay, just don't think about it,
0:22:43.483,0:22:48.944
just do it. [laughter]
0:22:48.944,0:22:51.600
The thinking about it is the problem
0:22:51.600,0:22:56.183
but don't actually do it on purpose, just when it happens.
0:22:56.183,0:23:00.284
That's one of the reasons why I learnt that much
0:23:00.284,0:23:04.371
of tiredness is the physically exhaustion which
0:23:04.371,0:23:06.776
you can't do too much about, actually you can do
0:23:06.776,0:23:09.321
something about it, but the major part of tiredness
0:23:09.321,0:23:12.458
is the mental, emotional, tiredness.
0:23:12.458,0:23:17.774
Emotional tiredness is because you're trying way too hard.
0:23:17.774,0:23:19.250
I don't know why you're trying.
0:23:19.250,0:23:23.683
Sometimes people try because, "oh I have to."[br]No you don't.
0:23:23.683,0:23:27.108
"But, but, my boss expects me to do some work."
0:23:27.108,0:23:29.102
As long as he thinks you're doing some work
0:23:29.102,0:23:32.468
that's good enough for the boss [laughter].
0:23:32.468,0:23:35.542
How many of you read, I love reading cartoons,
0:23:35.542,0:23:39.838
the Dilbert cartoon. I remember that Wally,
0:23:39.838,0:23:44.016
in the Dilbert cartoons Wally is this guy in the office,
0:23:44.016,0:23:47.034
you only ever see him carrying a cup of coffee from the left to
0:23:47.034,0:23:49.920
the right, the right to the left, he never does any work,
0:23:49.920,0:23:52.388
he just carries the coffee backwards and forwards,
0:23:52.388,0:23:54.622
and it appears like he's doing some work,
0:23:54.622,0:23:56.834
that's why he keeps his job.
0:23:56.834,0:24:01.811
Maybe that's why I keep my job, appearance. [laugher]
0:24:01.811,0:24:04.777
No anyway, so there's another lovely cartoon
0:24:04.777,0:24:08.055
which I saw the other day, rambling again,
0:24:08.055,0:24:11.309
somebody sent it to me and it's a wonderful one
0:24:11.309,0:24:15.743
to talk about - why people worry about death.
0:24:15.743,0:24:17.657
Just don't worry, it hasn't happened yet,
0:24:17.657,0:24:21.141
don't think about it, don't worry about the future.
0:24:21.141,0:24:25.184
And this cartoon was of Peanuts, you know
0:24:25.184,0:24:29.203
Snoopy and Charlie Brown, those wonderful characters.
0:24:29.203,0:24:32.375
And honestly, read those comics, because you get far more
0:24:32.375,0:24:34.709
sense out of those comics than you ever do
0:24:34.709,0:24:39.110
out of editorials or other news articles.
0:24:39.110,0:24:42.178
They're far more insightful.
0:24:42.178,0:24:46.605
And this Peanuts, this Charlie Brown and his dog Snoopy,
0:24:46.605,0:24:48.679
must have been on vacation somewhere,
0:24:48.679,0:24:52.281
they were on a pier and they were sitting there
0:24:52.281,0:24:55.598
enjoying the afternoon, this beautiful view,
0:24:55.598,0:24:59.109
just mountains and lakes and waters,
0:24:59.109,0:25:01.424
having a beautiful afternoon there,
0:25:01.424,0:25:04.955
and Charlie Brown says to his dog Snoopy,
0:25:04.955,0:25:13.300
"You know Snoopy, all of us one day will die."
0:25:13.300,0:25:15.878
And Snoopy, this great philosopher,
0:25:15.878,0:25:20.436
he really is wise dog, much wiser than human beings,
0:25:20.436,0:25:24.786
Snoopy says, "True, one day all of us will die,
0:25:24.786,0:25:31.930
but most days all of us won't die." [laughter]
0:25:31.930,0:25:35.000
What a wise thing to say.[br]Yeah, one day you'll die but most days
0:25:35.000,0:25:38.336
all of us won't. [laughter]
0:25:38.336,0:25:41.404
So why are you getting so negative?
0:25:41.404,0:25:45.049
So don't think about it, because thinking about
0:25:45.049,0:25:49.215
those things, that more than anything else, is what tires us.
0:25:49.215,0:25:54.453
So you get your kids trying to get good[br]scores in TER, don't think about it!
0:25:54.453,0:25:58.153
Doesn't matter that much,[br]if you can do well in that fine...
0:25:58.153,0:26:01.538
If it's natural, if you're naturally gifted then
0:26:01.538,0:26:04.768
fine but don't push yourself too hard for goodness sake.
0:26:04.768,0:26:08.436
Some parents get really upset at me for that but I want those kids to have
0:26:08.436,0:26:11.439
emotional intelligence, to feel loved and
0:26:11.439,0:26:16.681
respected even if they don't do well in those examinations.
0:26:16.681,0:26:21.542
As I keep saying, half of your children,[br]all the people here today, half of
0:26:21.542,0:26:26.933
your children will be below average intelligence.
0:26:26.933,0:26:29.605
Come on, it's logical, it has to be that way,
0:26:29.605,0:26:32.489
half of your children will be below
0:26:32.489,0:26:38.690
average intelligence, it has to be, that's what average means!
0:26:38.690,0:26:42.786
If you're all Einsteins, half of the Einsteins
0:26:42.786,0:26:47.099
have to be below average. [laughter]
0:26:47.099,0:26:53.129
But what do you think - "oh not not my kids,[br]their kids, okay, but not mine!"
0:26:53.129,0:26:56.857
So look, give your kids a break,
0:26:56.857,0:27:01.881
let them be, because if you take the pressure
0:27:01.881,0:27:05.272
off your kids at at early age,
0:27:05.272,0:27:09.094
they won't get so tired and they will develop
0:27:09.094,0:27:12.298
the emotional intelligence which I saw
0:27:12.298,0:27:15.692
in those Down's Syndrome people.
0:27:15.692,0:27:19.578
Beautiful people. They couldn't do sums,
0:27:19.578,0:27:25.280
they couldn't be electricians, they could be a monk.
0:27:25.280,0:27:28.345
They felt, they were sensitive, and they had
0:27:28.345,0:27:31.351
these beautiful relationships with each other.
0:27:31.351,0:27:33.630
Brothers and sisters, institutionalised,
0:27:33.630,0:27:37.622
but really really kind. I saw that.
0:27:37.622,0:27:40.183
Now what type of person do you want to be?
0:27:40.183,0:27:44.128
Your kids to be? They weren't tired, they had fun.
0:27:44.128,0:27:49.249
And when we accept ourselves for what we are,
0:27:49.249,0:27:52.301
instead of..going back to your kids,
0:27:52.301,0:27:55.296
don't push them, let them just develop,
0:27:55.296,0:27:59.404
nurture them, encourage them, inspire them,
0:27:59.404,0:28:01.846
but who knows what they will be in this life?
0:28:01.846,0:28:04.024
They're not all going to go to University
0:28:04.024,0:28:05.952
and it's terrible that everyone has to go to
0:28:05.952,0:28:08.055
University - there's so much more to the world
0:28:08.055,0:28:11.634
and life! So many people in this world,
0:28:11.634,0:28:15.381
University kills them.
0:28:15.381,0:28:19.232
There was a graffiti which I remember outside
0:28:19.232,0:28:21.413
the philosophy department,
0:28:21.413,0:28:27.218
no, this was actually outside the physics lab in Cambridge.
0:28:27.218,0:28:30.093
Graffiti in those days, you'd actually go looking
0:28:30.093,0:28:33.541
for it because it was really profound.
0:28:33.541,0:28:39.105
And that was - "exams - kill by degrees".
0:28:39.105,0:28:42.587
It's a wondeful pun - they kill by degrees.
0:28:42.587,0:28:47.121
They kill learning, they kill the excitement
0:28:47.121,0:28:49.816
of investigating knowledge, we have to be
0:28:49.816,0:28:53.470
tested and graded - who gets the best.
0:28:53.470,0:28:57.578
It actually kills emotional intelligence,
0:28:57.578,0:29:00.733
academic insitutitions, mostly, maybe they've
0:29:00.733,0:29:03.206
changed somewhere, most of them them they
0:29:03.206,0:29:09.885
kill that ability to explore and also to cooperate
0:29:09.885,0:29:12.893
with each other, because scores are all personal,
0:29:12.893,0:29:16.149
you have to compete against your best friends.
0:29:16.149,0:29:20.325
And of course that causes a lot of tiredness.
0:29:20.325,0:29:24.263
A lot of "you have to live up to something[br]you can't be."
0:29:24.263,0:29:31.146
That is a stress of life. Me, I don't have any stress[br]giving public talks.
0:29:31.146,0:29:35.192
Years and years and years ago I[br]worked it out, so simple!
0:29:35.192,0:29:39.835
That if I give a public talk and you guys like it,[br]wonderful! I get so much joy
0:29:39.835,0:29:44.791
seeing you happy and see I can actually[br]help you and change your lives.
0:29:44.791,0:29:49.284
I'm really happy if my talks are really well received.
0:29:49.284,0:29:52.987
But I'm even more happy if you don't like them!
0:29:52.987,0:29:57.013
Because then you can live me alone[br]and I can spend more time in my cave
0:29:57.013,0:30:00.195
and just enjoy my time, retire,[br]because you don't like my talks,
0:30:00.195,0:30:03.732
you've heard all the old jokes before,[br]all the stories before,
0:30:03.732,0:30:07.848
so none of you actually come here,[br]brilliant!
0:30:07.848,0:30:13.108
That actually is my trick, is my stratgy.[br]It did not work!
0:30:13.108,0:30:18.251
I decided to write all my stories in books,[br]so you don't have to come back anymore.
0:30:18.251,0:30:22.684
I have to keep telling them until you get[br]so bored that you won't come back.
0:30:22.684,0:30:25.212
But it doesn't work...[br]You keep coming back for more.
0:30:25.212,0:30:29.108
You must be all masochists [chuckles].
0:30:29.108,0:30:34.942
But no.. the point was, I don't care![br]Either way life is good!
0:30:34.942,0:30:37.777
You succeed, you don't succeed.
0:30:37.777,0:30:45.341
But the trouble is the pressure is on you[br]in this world - you only have one idea of success.
0:30:45.341,0:30:49.854
Or limited ideas of what being a[br]successful person is.
0:30:49.854,0:30:56.357
I want to try and make more ideas[br]of success, broaden it.
0:30:56.357,0:31:03.185
Even if you're living out in the streets,[br]you're living out in the street happily.
0:31:03.185,0:31:05.368
Is that success?
0:31:05.368,0:31:08.539
Sometimes people think,[br]"oh that poor person"
0:31:08.539,0:31:13.494
You ask the person and they say,[br]"No, I'm free, I don't have to worry about.."
0:31:13.494,0:31:16.875
It's a bit cold maybe..[br]Have you lived out in the street?
0:31:16.875,0:31:20.548
I remember just in the hippie years,[br]camping out under bridges.
0:31:20.548,0:31:25.464
I remember as a monk, one of the[br]most wondeful times I had as a monk
0:31:25.464,0:31:29.569
was when we had to leave the monastery in[br]in Thailand after 5 years,
0:31:29.569,0:31:34.049
you had your basic training,[br]out, out, out, go!
0:31:34.049,0:31:40.960
And we had to just walk and[br]eveything I owned I carried with me.
0:31:40.960,0:31:45.682
It wasn't that much, you could walk,[br]it was light. All my possessions
0:31:45.682,0:31:51.144
were on my back and it never ached.[br]And it was a beautiful feeling of freedom,
0:31:51.144,0:31:56.023
like being a bird,[br]and you could be a bird as a human being,
0:31:56.023,0:32:02.125
and every crossroad I came to you could go[br]any directions you wanted,
0:32:02.125,0:32:07.365
you had no pressure on you[br]to get anywhere, to achieve anything,
0:32:07.365,0:32:15.291
you had no deadlines, no appointments,[br]you just "that's a nice direction, I'll go there."[br]
0:32:15.291,0:32:20.720
You had this wonderful ability to sleep anywhere,[br]in a rice field, in a paddock.
0:32:20.720,0:32:28.019
The best place, my teacher said to sleep[br]as a monk at that time was in the
0:32:28.019,0:32:32.990
cremation grounds. The reason[br]was that Thai people were so scared
0:32:32.990,0:32:39.050
of ghosts you'd be guaranteed[br]a peaceful evening if you went there.
0:32:39.050,0:32:41.759
But if you go anywhere else[br]they'd always come asking you
0:32:41.759,0:32:45.532
questions or whatever, so the[br]cremation grounds were the favourite
0:32:45.532,0:32:48.645
places to go sleep at night.
0:32:48.645,0:32:57.438
Everyone else was sleeping there[br]as well - all the corpses [chuckles]
0:32:57.438,0:32:59.598
It's a very nice place to have a sleep.
0:32:59.598,0:33:05.279
But anyway, there was a beautiful feeling,[br]you had no pressure on you.
0:33:05.279,0:33:08.110
So much freedom wherever you wanted to go.
0:33:08.110,0:33:13.898
And in the morning you'd go to any[br]village and get enough to eat on the alms round.
0:33:13.898,0:33:20.347
You didn't need any money,[br]just your alms bowl.
0:33:20.347,0:33:28.008
The beautiful feeling of freedom,[br]and even though you walked a long distance
0:33:28.008,0:33:34.720
and it was hot, you never felt tired[br]emotionally because you hardly
0:33:34.720,0:33:39.413
thought because there was nothing[br]to think about.
0:33:39.413,0:33:42.988
What do you think about?[br]Your worries.
0:33:42.988,0:33:45.733
Where you have to be,[br]how you're going to get there.
0:33:45.733,0:33:52.366
We waste so much time and energy[br]worrying about the future which is
0:33:52.366,0:33:58.609
why if you are to overcome tiredness[br]and it's a big problem for you,
0:33:58.609,0:34:04.020
one of the things is please learn[br]how to keep your mind efficient.
0:34:04.020,0:34:08.804
Doing life is easy, thinking about it[br]is the hard part.
0:34:08.804,0:34:15.608
Living with a partner is easy,[br]if you think about it, it drives you crazy.
0:34:15.608,0:34:19.236
Honestly, just in Thailand they were saying,
0:34:19.236,0:34:24.314
"Oh, my husband keeps yapping at me,[br]he's really nasty to me."
0:34:24.314,0:34:29.832
I say again, if your husband comes home[br]and he's always nasty to you,
0:34:29.832,0:34:37.204
says all these bad things remember[br]why you were born with two ears,
0:34:37.204,0:34:43.390
one to go in, one to go out,[br]don't keep anything!
0:34:43.390,0:34:46.892
Because when you keep it,[br]that's called thinking about it,
0:34:46.892,0:34:50.082
you let it go immediately.
0:34:50.082,0:34:59.855
The ability to let go of stuff which is not[br]necessary, that's the secret of overcoming tiredness.
0:34:59.855,0:35:02.955
Let go of thinking, just do it.
0:35:02.955,0:35:09.920
Let go of the future, you're exhausted[br]worrying about what's going to happen next.
0:35:09.920,0:35:16.831
And let go of the past - I don't know if[br]I told this a couple of weeks ago but
0:35:16.831,0:35:24.387
a very wonderful compliment which[br]I got, 2-3 weeks ago I did my annual
0:35:24.387,0:35:30.969
visit to the Cancer Wellness Association,[br]they started off in this old house in Cottesloe,
0:35:30.969,0:35:36.174
and the government, good on the Western Australian[br]government, they actually put a
0:35:36.174,0:35:42.036
lot of money into building a huge campus,[br]everything to do with cancer,
0:35:42.036,0:35:47.264
so there you will find the Melanoma Society,[br]the Prostate Cancer Society,
0:35:47.264,0:35:51.471
the Breast Cancer Society,[br]and the general wellness association,
0:35:51.471,0:35:58.195
just all in one area, which is brilliant.[br]And I go there every year.
0:35:58.195,0:36:03.231
And when I went there, I was reminded,[br]my 26th year going there,
0:36:03.231,0:36:08.494
it's a long time, 26 years, and they said[br]the reason we always invite you back,
0:36:08.494,0:36:11.400
usually the first talk of the season,[br]the first talk of the year,
0:36:11.400,0:36:17.945
to get it started in a good way,[br]they said 26 years ago there was a girl there,
0:36:17.945,0:36:24.922
a woman, she had cancer, she got into[br]remission but she always worried
0:36:24.922,0:36:32.582
what would happen if it came back,[br]and no counselor could help her,
0:36:32.582,0:36:36.992
and then this monk comes along,[br]and tells the story of the other
0:36:36.992,0:36:42.161
great philosopher, I told already[br]about Snoopy, the American philospher,
0:36:42.161,0:36:46.480
the greatest philosopher of the last century.[br]But there was even an earlier English philosopher
0:36:46.480,0:36:54.271
I really really respect, if you like philosophy[br]check out one of the best philosophers
0:36:54.271,0:37:00.310
who's ever been written about called[br]Winnie the Pooh [laughter]
0:37:00.310,0:37:04.337
Now the other philosophers who teach in[br]universities there's just full of too many words,
0:37:04.337,0:37:08.061
they never get to the heart of it![br]And there's Winnie the Pooh,
0:37:08.061,0:37:12.684
one of my favourite stories, it would've[br]been in Opening the Door of Your Heart,
0:37:12.684,0:37:19.412
I actually wrote to Disney who has the[br]copyright for Winnie the Pooh now
0:37:19.412,0:37:22.936
and they said "absolutely no!"[br]Because Disney is so commercial
0:37:22.936,0:37:26.880
they won't allow anybody, even though[br]it's a tiny tiny little bit from that book
0:37:26.880,0:37:33.980
Winnie the Pooh, but anyway[br]the story was which I told 26 years ago
0:37:33.980,0:37:37.965
at the Cancer Wellness Association,[br]the story was about Winnie the Pooh and
0:37:37.965,0:37:43.636
little Piglet walking through the forest[br]when there was a storm and twigs were
0:37:43.636,0:37:48.450
coming down, branches were coming down,[br]and then trees started getting uprooted.
0:37:48.450,0:37:54.966
Storms are dangerous. You shouldn't be[br]out in a storm in a forest and so Piglet
0:37:54.966,0:38:01.473
was really afraid and his fear got so huge[br]he turned to Winnie the Pooh and said
0:38:01.473,0:38:05.867
"I can't go any longer![br]I can't walk any longer! I'm so afraid."
0:38:05.867,0:38:07.859
"Why?" said Winnie the Pooh.
0:38:07.859,0:38:15.118
"I'm so afraid that a tree might fall[br]when we are underneath it!"
0:38:15.118,0:38:22.224
Which was a possibility...[br]And Winnie the Pooh shot back,
0:38:22.224,0:38:26.649
which showed what a great philosopher[br]he was, if he didn't have so much hair he
0:38:26.649,0:38:31.642
could've been a Buddhist monk [laughter]
0:38:31.642,0:38:42.652
He shot back with, "what would happen if[br]a tree fell when we were not underneath it?"
0:38:42.652,0:38:47.151
And that was the end of the fear.[br]Because all fear is looking into the future
0:38:47.151,0:38:51.798
with a negative mind, thinking of all[br]the things which will go wrong
0:38:51.798,0:38:57.630
with a fault-finding mind, that's called fear.[br]The opposite is hope, looking at the
0:38:57.630,0:39:01.719
future with a positive mind,[br]what might go right,
0:39:01.719,0:39:08.315
and you would have noticed in your life,[br]if you fear something, it's more likely
0:39:08.315,0:39:16.505
to happen, with hope, what you hope for[br]is more likely to happen.
0:39:16.505,0:39:24.207
So when I told that story to this girl[br]26 years ago, I answered her question.
0:39:24.207,0:39:26.667
What would happen if the cancer came back?
0:39:26.667,0:39:30.920
The answer was - what would happen if it[br]didn't come back?
0:39:30.920,0:39:35.950
It never came back, and that's why[br]they keep inviting me there.
0:39:35.950,0:39:40.555
I come back but the cancer doesn't[br][laughter]
0:39:40.555,0:39:43.577
Now you can understand,[br]analyse that a little deeper,
0:39:43.577,0:39:48.351
it's obvious, when you look at it a bit[br]deeper, if you're worried about a cancer,
0:39:48.351,0:39:50.663
"what would happen if it came back??[br]will it come back?"
0:39:50.663,0:39:54.530
you're getting tense, you're getting worried,[br]the sort of things, the sort of stress which
0:39:54.530,0:40:01.418
causes cancer, you are just putting into place.[br]But if you think, what happens if it doesn't,
0:40:01.418,0:40:05.557
you don't worry about it, which means you're[br]more relaxed, more healthy, and
0:40:05.557,0:40:08.380
the chances are the cancer is not[br]going to come back.
0:40:08.380,0:40:16.923
You increase the chances of success,[br]good health, happiness,
0:40:16.923,0:40:25.515
and also you don't get so tired,[br]worrying about what will happen.
0:40:25.515,0:40:33.189
Deeper, this is meditation teachings[br]but it's brilliant teachings -
0:40:33.189,0:40:38.659
"two parts to the human mind",[br]this is why people get tired.
0:40:38.705,0:40:43.106
I call it the doing and the knowing.[br]If you've been to any of my meditation
0:40:43.106,0:40:49.553
teachings you will know this, it's a very[br]powerful way of looking at the human mind.
0:40:49.553,0:40:52.894
The doing mind is what reacts,[br]it's reacting to what I'm saying,
0:40:52.894,0:40:55.965
thinking about it, saying,[br]"oh that's good" or "that's rubbish",
0:40:55.965,0:41:00.801
that reaction is called doing.[br]Planning, remembering,
0:41:00.801,0:41:05.230
figuring out things, initiating action,[br]deciding to walk,
0:41:05.230,0:41:09.562
figuring out what you're going to do when[br]you leave here, what you're going to do
0:41:09.562,0:41:14.937
on the weekend, all that is part of the doing mind.
0:41:14.937,0:41:18.790
The other part of the mind is just[br]what knows.
0:41:18.790,0:41:22.690
The passive consciousness,[br]just being aware,
0:41:22.690,0:41:28.844
feeling the itch on your arm,[br]feeling the coolness of this room,
0:41:28.844,0:41:35.338
hearing the sound of the traffic[br]in the distance.
0:41:35.338,0:41:39.545
Just knowing.[br]Now, once you know the difference
0:41:39.545,0:41:45.459
between those two parts of the human[br]mind it won't take you long to notice
0:41:45.459,0:41:50.332
that most of your mental energy,[br]over 90% of it,
0:41:50.332,0:41:57.070
goes into doing stuff, reacting.[br]Which means you've hardly got anything
0:41:57.070,0:42:02.489
left just to know, to be aware, to feel.[br]Which is why so many people,
0:42:02.489,0:42:07.831
they can't even see the stars at night,[br]even when they're up,
0:42:07.831,0:42:13.260
they're just doing too much.[br]They can't feel the wind,
0:42:13.260,0:42:18.030
they don't know when it rains,[br]they're too busy doing something else,
0:42:18.030,0:42:24.044
they're not alive, and they're also[br]very very tired,
0:42:24.044,0:42:32.991
doing far too much,[br]being far too little.
0:42:32.991,0:42:42.587
What happens, if instead of actually[br]thinking you just "are", just feeling,
0:42:42.587,0:42:46.265
feeling the wind, feeling the cold,[br]feeling the heat, walking back to the
0:42:46.265,0:42:54.786
car with your shoes off, feeling the stone[br]or the grass under your feet.
0:42:54.786,0:42:58.650
You feel alive,[br]but not just feeling alive,
0:42:58.650,0:43:04.402
you are feeding energy into knowing,[br]taking it away from doing so much.
0:43:04.402,0:43:07.181
When you put energy back into[br]passive awareness -
0:43:07.181,0:43:16.556
knowing, mindfulness - tiredness starts to go.[br]You wake up because the
0:43:16.556,0:43:22.030
mental tiredness is the knower with[br]very low energy.
0:43:22.030,0:43:26.299
Put energy into the awareness and[br]you'll feel awake.
0:43:26.299,0:43:31.494
A good example of that is having a[br]cup of coffee.
0:43:31.494,0:43:34.197
Before you have a cup of coffee[br]you're miserable.
0:43:34.197,0:43:37.332
Have a cup of coffee, you can feel more,[br]you're awake, you're alive,
0:43:37.332,0:43:41.741
you can see things, you can hear things,[br]you can think.
0:43:41.741,0:43:48.594
That's unnatural energy, it's still energy,[br]but imagine that energy was natural.
0:43:48.594,0:43:52.973
So you wake up alive.[br]When the mind is energised,
0:43:52.973,0:43:58.690
it energises the body, that's why[br]what I was doing 10 minutes after
0:43:58.690,0:44:03.356
I was teaching you in the meditation[br]session, that's why usually I give guided
0:44:03.356,0:44:09.040
meditation almost all the way through,[br]but I was so exhausted, so tired,
0:44:09.040,0:44:12.481
if you want to know why I'll tell you[br]what I've been doing the last two weeks
0:44:12.481,0:44:17.869
and today, if you want to know why it was there,[br]the reason, I should be exhausted,
0:44:17.869,0:44:24.718
I taught you for 20 minutes, and then right,[br]no more doing anything,
0:44:24.718,0:44:32.665
kept my mind really still,[br]getting energy pouring back into awareness,
0:44:32.665,0:44:41.459
you wake up alive.[br]Wow, that's incredible,
0:44:41.459,0:44:47.929
feeling the wind.. Can you hear that?[br]Feel it? Wow..
0:44:47.929,0:44:52.726
Most people wouldn't be able to[br]hear that, but you did.
0:44:52.726,0:45:01.075
Energy starts to come back,[br]tiredness vanishes.
0:45:01.075,0:45:09.318
Heard a story at a global conference,[br]a psychologist, he's a good psychologist,
0:45:09.318,0:45:15.071
but a bit crazy, why you have to pay people[br]to tell you this is absolutely ridiculous.
0:45:15.071,0:45:20.409
His therapy, his method of therapy,[br]which is very very popular,
0:45:20.409,0:45:29.718
you go to his place and pay a lot of money[br]and he tells you to go have a walk in nature.
0:45:29.718,0:45:34.632
And it works! People's problems disappear,[br]he makes a lot of money,
0:45:34.632,0:45:39.474
their problems disappear, that's it.[br]Smart guy.
0:45:39.474,0:45:44.167
But why is it - walking in nature,[br]or being by the ocean by yourself,
0:45:44.167,0:45:49.418
not swimming or surfing, just sitting there.[br]When you go to a forest and just do nothing,
0:45:49.418,0:45:55.554
why is that therapeutic?[br]Simply because energy is going back
0:45:55.554,0:46:01.057
into mindfulness, into knowing,[br]you're not doing so much,
0:46:01.057,0:46:06.746
which means that your tiredness is going,[br]it's vanishing, and when that
0:46:06.746,0:46:12.963
tiredness vanishes, your health,[br]mental, emotional, physical,
0:46:12.963,0:46:20.339
increases enormously.[br]You're healing just because in nature you
0:46:20.339,0:46:24.215
can't do very much.[br]Check it out this weekend.
0:46:24.215,0:46:32.505
You've got a choice - go shopping[br]or go into the forest.
0:46:32.505,0:46:41.496
And check what you feel like afterwards.[br]One is so much doing you come back tired.
0:46:41.496,0:46:45.709
You go to a forest, or by a beach,[br]a quiet place by yourself,
0:46:45.709,0:46:49.305
go into King's Park or whatever,[br]walk around the river quietly,
0:46:49.305,0:46:55.883
not really doing much, and you find your[br]tiredness vanishes. Please for goodness sake,
0:46:55.883,0:47:01.064
give yourself a break.[br]Too many people getting cancers,
0:47:01.064,0:47:08.457
too many partners breaking up.[br]Too many kids just not being able to
0:47:08.457,0:47:12.632
connect with their parents, because their[br]parents can't connect with them,
0:47:12.632,0:47:19.117
because they're too tired.[br]Not being able to listen because they're
0:47:19.117,0:47:25.818
too dull. For goodness sake understand[br]tiredness is one of the biggest scourges
0:47:25.818,0:47:33.280
of our modern age, and there's many many[br]ways, especially what you're heard tonight,
0:47:33.280,0:47:41.640
can overcome that tiredness and I've proved[br]it just by giving a talk, for 50 minutes,
0:47:41.640,0:47:48.115
even though by all reasonable people[br]it should have been impossible.
0:47:48.115,0:48:02.643
Thank you for listening.[br]Sadhu!! Sadhu!! Sadhu!!
0:48:02.643,0:48:08.242
Okay, that's energy!
0:48:08.242,0:48:13.358
Very good. What have we got here?[br]From Ireland, France and London!
0:48:13.358,0:48:17.526
Wow, Europe.[br]How do we deal with the tiredness with
0:48:17.526,0:48:21.519
people telling us we're wrong,[br]or that stuff we believe in is wrong?
0:48:21.519,0:48:29.685
Just tell them - yeah you're right,[br]I am wrong. When I went to Malaysia
0:48:29.685,0:48:39.591
a lot, this is one of the problems.[br]In Malaysia there are also many Christians,
0:48:39.591,0:48:44.243
and these are the evangelical ones,[br]the ones that want to convert everybody..
0:48:44.243,0:48:48.706
And so there was a problem in Malaysia,[br]also in Singapore,
0:48:48.706,0:48:54.901
there's an old Buddhist man, been Buddhist all his life,[br]but his grandkid or his son had become
0:48:54.901,0:48:58.705
an evangelical. Everyone else was Buddhist.[br]Or even Hindu, or whatever.
0:48:58.705,0:49:04.612
And the son would think, "My father will go[br]to hell if he doesn't convert.."
0:49:04.612,0:49:11.314
So he'd go with his friends, and his pastor,[br]by the bedside of this really sick and dying
0:49:11.314,0:49:19.032
person, and keep harassing them until they[br]converted, and it was such a painful experience
0:49:19.032,0:49:23.883
that even I think the Singapore government[br]made rules against that.
0:49:23.883,0:49:29.709
But someone asked me - what was your advice? If that's my son, my grandson,
0:49:29.709,0:49:35.171
I'm dying, he comes with his pastor,[br]his friends and they start talking about
0:49:35.171,0:49:39.596
the Bible, Hallelujah, and I'm going to go[br]to hell if I don't convert,
0:49:39.596,0:49:43.627
and Jesus is the only way,[br]what do I do?
0:49:43.627,0:49:50.642
Don't try to convince them they're wrong.[br]You can't. Convert!
0:49:50.642,0:49:54.265
Tell them, "oh yeah that makes a lot[br]of sense, grandson, okay I will take
0:49:54.265,0:49:57.661
Jesus as my saviour."[br]And they go Hallelujah, Hallelujah,
0:49:57.661,0:50:00.712
and then they leave you alone.[br]And as soon as they've walked out
0:50:00.712,0:50:05.906
of the door, you can convert back again.[br][laughter] Become a Buddhist.
0:50:05.906,0:50:10.387
That's my practical advice.[br]So if someone says, "you're wrong,
0:50:10.387,0:50:12.730
you're wrong, you're wrong."[br]"Yeah, you're right, I agree with you,"
0:50:12.730,0:50:17.869
"I'm wrong, okay". Then they leave you alone.[br]And as soon as they leave you alone,
0:50:17.869,0:50:22.893
"no that's rubbish, I was right all along"[br][laughter]
0:50:22.893,0:50:32.406
Otherwise it's impossible. I say this even[br]with partners, whoever you're living with,
0:50:32.406,0:50:36.483
you should know by now.[br][Phone rings] There we go, music to
0:50:36.483,0:50:43.640
give an answer to a talk, that's fine,[br]that happens, anyway it's not your fault,
0:50:43.640,0:50:47.012
it's your mobile phone's fault,[br]so don't get angry at you,
0:50:47.012,0:50:53.246
spank your mobile phone, or whatever,[br]put your mobile phone in detention.
0:50:53.246,0:50:59.549
What was I talking about? Oh yeah,[br]about being wrong.
0:50:59.549,0:51:04.705
There is no way in the world you will[br]ever be able to convince your partner
0:51:04.705,0:51:09.228
that he's wrong, no way.[br]And you should have found that out
0:51:09.228,0:51:13.295
by now, how long have you been[br]living with that guy?
0:51:13.295,0:51:23.056
You can't do it. Even if you were, say,[br]the Prime Minister of Germany,
0:51:23.056,0:51:27.086
what's her name again?[br]Angela Merkel!
0:51:27.086,0:51:30.635
Incredibly smart woman, very powerful,[br]I'm not sure if she's married,
0:51:30.635,0:51:34.450
but I bet she always loses arguments[br]with her husband, there's no way she can
0:51:34.450,0:51:41.338
convince her husband he's wrong.[br]And Obama cannot convince Michelle,
0:51:41.338,0:51:45.611
his wife, she's wrong, it's impossible.[br]Doesn't matter how powerful, intelligent,
0:51:45.611,0:51:52.121
you are, it cannot be done.[br]So don't try it. Many husbands say
0:51:52.121,0:51:59.964
"Yes dear, yes dear, I agree with you dear,"[br]and they go off and do whatever they want. [laughter]
0:51:59.964,0:52:06.298
It's true, so get used to that, wives.[br]So anyway, we developed,
0:52:06.298,0:52:09.535
if you haven't heard this yet,[br]I always tell this story when I do weddings,
0:52:09.535,0:52:14.702
another wedding tomorrow afternoon.[br]There's no way you can convince someone
0:52:14.702,0:52:22.753
they're wrong, so how can you actually[br]make a decision and actually get on
0:52:22.753,0:52:29.477
in life but not always having to submit.[br]That really sucks doesn't it?
0:52:29.477,0:52:33.022
He's always right, why do I[br]always have to agree with him?
0:52:33.022,0:52:39.911
Why does she always have to be right?[br]So the calendar method, the solution,
0:52:39.911,0:52:45.334
which allows people to live harmoniously[br]with their partners, the calendar method
0:52:45.334,0:52:51.015
is that when you have an argument,[br]don't argue who's right and wrong!
0:52:51.015,0:52:57.776
Let the calendar decide![br]On the odd days of the month she is right. [laughter]
0:52:57.776,0:53:04.065
The girl is always right on the odd days[br]of the month. On the even days he is right.
0:53:04.065,0:53:11.722
So that's fair. Today is the 19th, so today[br]all the girls are right! Yay!
0:53:11.722,0:53:19.092
Be careful, tomorrow he is right. [laughter][br]That way you don't have to argue anymore.
0:53:19.092,0:53:25.983
The calendar decides who's right without[br]any arguments and you can make a decision.
0:53:25.983,0:53:33.051
It's never that bad if the other person makes[br]a decision, not you, at least it's fair.
0:53:33.051,0:53:36.965
And people have already figured out,[br]you girls have already figured out,
0:53:36.965,0:53:42.190
you get more days right a year than he does.[br]Only about four or five,
0:53:42.190,0:53:47.225
but guys, give it to them, it's worth it.[br]The trouble is, people say,
0:53:47.225,0:53:55.933
what happens if you're in a gay relationship?[br][laughter] Then you've got me stumped,
0:53:55.933,0:54:06.669
it doesn't work. Both of you are right on one[br]day, the next day both of you are wrong. [laughter]
0:54:06.669,0:54:11.376
Anyway, when people tell you you're wrong[br]I just forget about it, just let them tell you,
0:54:11.376,0:54:14.432
just do it, don't think about it,[br]and afterwards you realise
0:54:14.432,0:54:17.701
they can tell you whatever they want,[br]it's just rubbish.
0:54:17.701,0:54:20.519
[Next Question] Do you think there's a link[br]between tiredness, and the oxygen
0:54:20.519,0:54:23.202
we breathe, pollution or how you breathe?
0:54:23.202,0:54:25.555
There is a little bit of a connection[br]there because oxygen gives you
0:54:25.555,0:54:31.351
physical energy and if it's not much[br]oxygen, or it's polluted, or something like that,
0:54:31.351,0:54:36.867
of course that will impact the amount[br]of oxygen you can breathe in but usually
0:54:36.867,0:54:42.914
the lungs compensate so if there's not[br]much oxygen coming in you breathe in more.
0:54:42.914,0:54:46.484
That's what happened to me when I[br]went to Bhutan.
0:54:46.484,0:54:52.169
It was very clear air but there's hardly[br]any oxygen when you go up to Tiger's Nest,
0:54:52.169,0:54:56.002
because it's very very high up.[br]At the bottom of that hill
0:54:56.002,0:55:00.637
someone had an energy bar,[br]a little energy bar like you can buy here,
0:55:00.637,0:55:05.711
a Mars bar or something, but when[br]they got to the top it ballooned out.
0:55:05.711,0:55:10.188
They showed it to me, it was like a balloon,[br]because the air temperature at the top
0:55:10.188,0:55:14.930
and bottom was so different that the[br]pressure inside at the bottom was just
0:55:14.930,0:55:19.378
ordinary pressure but by the time[br]we got up to the top it was a balloon.
0:55:19.378,0:55:24.008
So that's how high it was, and there was[br]hardly any oxygen there, but what happens
0:55:24.008,0:55:30.624
is that the lungs breathe in more.[br]So yeah, there's a little bit between
0:55:30.624,0:55:33.117
the tiredness and the oxygen but not[br]that much because the body usually
0:55:33.117,0:55:36.478
knows how to compensate.[br]It doesn't know how to compensate
0:55:36.478,0:55:39.293
when you think too much..
0:55:39.293,0:55:43.608
Dear Ajahn (from London), what can a person[br]do when they have lost everything in their life
0:55:43.608,0:55:47.767
and have torturous anxiety about the future.
0:55:47.767,0:55:51.557
Remember me, I have lost everything
0:55:51.557,0:55:57.273
in my life. I've lost my degree, it doesn't[br]count for anything anymore.
0:55:57.273,0:56:01.908
I've lost all my money, haven't got a cent.[br]I had some money when I was young.
0:56:01.908,0:56:12.158
What else did I lose? I lost girlfriends,[br]money, possessions, everything.
0:56:12.158,0:56:17.995
I lost all my past, all my memories.[br]I lost all my fears.
0:56:17.995,0:56:21.792
I've lost my security. I don't have[br]superannuation. I'm not allowed
0:56:21.792,0:56:25.815
according to how monks agree,[br]to take a pension.
0:56:25.815,0:56:30.528
I haven't got anything.[br]What would happen if you didn't
0:56:30.528,0:56:40.199
feed me tomorrow or the day after?[br]Ah! Now losing everything is not
0:56:40.199,0:56:47.205
the problem, sometimes it gives you[br]a lot of freedom, you can live simply,
0:56:47.205,0:56:53.394
learn to live simply.[br]The torturous anxiety, now that,
0:56:53.394,0:56:56.232
you've lost possessions,[br]but now you're allowing your peace
0:56:56.232,0:57:02.752
to be lost as well. Recently we had a[br]break-in at Bodhinyana monastery.
0:57:02.752,0:57:07.395
They pinched some chainsaws.[br]Straightaway, I said they can pinch the
0:57:07.395,0:57:10.375
chainsaws, they can steal that,[br]but they're not going to steal our
0:57:10.375,0:57:16.325
peace and compassion. We're not going to[br]worry about that. In fact it turned out
0:57:16.325,0:57:20.064
to be really good because those[br]chainsaws were quite old and the
0:57:20.064,0:57:24.027
insurance allowed us to get much better[br]ones. [laughter]
0:57:24.027,0:57:28.543
So if ever that thief is around,[br]come up here and we'll say thankyou.
0:57:28.543,0:57:32.038
I shouldn't say that but it actually[br]worked out good in the end.
0:57:32.038,0:57:34.469
They can come into your house[br]and they can steal your possessions
0:57:34.469,0:57:38.172
but why allow them to steal your[br]happiness as well?
0:57:38.172,0:57:41.398
You don't need to do that.[br]So you may have lost all your physical
0:57:41.398,0:57:46.080
possessions, maybe lost your wife,[br]or your kids, or something,
0:57:46.080,0:57:56.954
but you don't need to lose your happiness.[br]That is losing your hope.
0:57:56.954,0:58:01.995
So what you can do is restore hope.[br]See other people, sometimes when we
0:58:01.995,0:58:06.976
have these little groups,[br]people in the same situation,
0:58:06.976,0:58:12.421
what's that called again?[br]Therapy groups, peer support groups,
0:58:12.421,0:58:15.344
sometimes when we hear what other[br]people have gone through, which is similar
0:58:15.344,0:58:23.516
to what we've gone through, it gives us hope[br]instead of fear and anxiety.
0:58:23.516,0:58:28.141
That's such an important thing to create[br]in your life - hope.
0:58:28.141,0:58:34.910
So even if you haven't been able to[br]find a partner in life, don't give up,
0:58:34.910,0:58:42.078
keep on going. If you fear you won't,[br]then you will not. You can always have hope,
0:58:42.078,0:58:49.184
"yes it's possible", then you're opening the[br]doors to success. So always look into
0:58:49.184,0:58:56.229
the future with a positive mind and then[br]your last experience will never take
0:58:56.229,0:59:02.617
away your hope and where there's[br]hope there is success.
0:59:02.617,0:59:07.767
So thank you to those people. It's 9 o'clock now.[br]So is there any questions from the floor?
0:59:07.767,0:59:11.742
Good, great, bye bye. [laughter]
0:59:11.742,0:59:14.026
Okay, we're going to bow down to the[br]Buddha, Dhamma, Sangha.
0:59:14.026,0:59:19.098
I'm sorry if I can't say hello to you,[br]because I have to rush off and go
0:59:19.098,0:59:24.477
and teach down in Jhana Grove[br]for a nice retreat.