WEBVTT

00:00:20.100 --> 00:00:22.710
Good morning.

00:00:22.710 --> 00:00:24.998
Before we kick off
let's get a bit of light in the room.

00:00:24.998 --> 00:00:27.223
So I can see the faces of the dummi ---

00:00:27.223 --> 00:00:30.068
the participants that we get later 
and see where you are.

00:00:30.068 --> 00:00:31.623
That's a bit better. Good.

00:00:31.623 --> 00:00:35.247
Everybody hold your right hand in front 
like this in a handshaking position.

00:00:35.262 --> 00:00:38.645
Uncross your legs. Relaxed position.
Right hand in front.

00:00:38.645 --> 00:00:40.908
When I say "Now"
here's what we're going to do.

00:00:40.908 --> 00:00:42.658
You'll turn to someone besides you

00:00:42.658 --> 00:00:44.798
shake hands as if meeting
for the first time

00:00:44.798 --> 00:00:47.515
and keep pumping till I ask you to stop.

00:00:47.515 --> 00:00:49.215
Then you'll stop and freeze it

00:00:49.215 --> 00:00:50.489
and we're going to analyze
what's happening.

00:00:50.489 --> 00:00:51.323
You got that?

00:00:51.323 --> 00:00:53.371
No time to think about this.
Do it now.

00:00:53.371 --> 00:00:55.307
Pick anybody and pump. 
Pump, everybody.

00:00:55.307 --> 00:00:57.673
Pump! Pump! Pump!

00:00:57.673 --> 00:01:00.040
Freeze it. Hold it.
Stop. Hold it. Freeze it.

00:01:00.049 --> 00:01:02.571
Keep your hands locked. Keep them locked.

00:01:02.571 --> 00:01:05.209
Person's whose hand
is most on top is saying

00:01:05.209 --> 00:01:07.683
I'll be the boss for the rest of the day.

00:01:07.683 --> 00:01:09.414
(Laughter)

00:01:16.384 --> 00:01:20.291
And when you meet people
for the very first time

00:01:20.291 --> 00:01:22.314
the first 4-minutes
of meeting a new person

00:01:22.314 --> 00:01:26.510
you decide pretty much
80% of your attitude about it, don't you?

00:01:26.510 --> 00:01:29.787
You decide in the first 4-minutes
of meeting somebody

00:01:29.787 --> 00:01:33.935
if you'll give them a fair go, a fair
hearing or if you're going to reject them.

00:01:33.935 --> 00:01:36.461
The first thing is likely to happen
is a handshake.

00:01:36.461 --> 00:01:38.950
And I'm going to try a couple
in the front row here.

00:01:38.950 --> 00:01:41.872
You get one of three feelings
when you lock hands with people.

00:01:41.872 --> 00:01:44.072
First thing is -- it feels pretty good.

00:01:44.072 --> 00:01:45.963
I think you and I will get on pretty well.

00:01:45.963 --> 00:01:47.779
I think we could do business together.

00:01:47.779 --> 00:01:49.108
We're going to get on well.

00:01:49.108 --> 00:01:52.136
That was a good one. 
Let's try a second one.

00:01:52.136 --> 00:01:53.340
Okay.

00:01:53.340 --> 00:01:55.091
(Laughter)

00:01:55.091 --> 00:01:58.320
Just check my cash,
see if it's all still there, yeah.

00:01:58.320 --> 00:01:59.842
Felt a bit intimidated there.

00:01:59.842 --> 00:02:01.426
Let's try the third one.

00:02:01.426 --> 00:02:03.938
Yes, she'll do anything I want. Won't you?

00:02:03.938 --> 00:02:05.488
(Laughter)

00:02:05.488 --> 00:02:07.819
Actually you all had roughly
the same handshake.

00:02:07.819 --> 00:02:11.122
But you do get one of three gut feelings.
It has to do with two things.

00:02:11.122 --> 00:02:13.522
One, the angle of the hand,
second, the power of the hand.

00:02:13.522 --> 00:02:16.233
I'll demonstrate.
This gentleman in the front row.

00:02:16.236 --> 00:02:17.932
Can you join me up here please?

00:02:17.932 --> 00:02:20.558
Yes? The fellow looking concerned.
(Applause)

00:02:20.558 --> 00:02:23.138
Come up here.

00:02:23.138 --> 00:02:25.964
Here's your modern western handshake.
Here's how it looks.

00:02:25.964 --> 00:02:28.937
It's been in this position
for about 2,000 years.

00:02:28.937 --> 00:02:31.550
If you go back 4,000 years
to the Roman era,

00:02:31.550 --> 00:02:34.160
on vases you would have seen it
looking like this.

00:02:34.160 --> 00:02:37.223
That's the original position.
It has several significances.

00:02:37.237 --> 00:02:40.789
So the troop leaders would meet
after battle or training.

00:02:40.789 --> 00:02:44.859
They're always men, so this has remained
a male activity until recent times.

00:02:44.859 --> 00:02:46.717
When they would meet they would do this.

00:02:46.717 --> 00:02:48.882
If his arm was stronger
it would go like this.

00:02:48.882 --> 00:02:51.083
And you'd then say
"He's got the upper hand."

00:02:51.083 --> 00:02:53.109
Upper hand is an ancient Roman expression.

00:02:53.109 --> 00:02:55.679
If he's got the upper hand, 
his guys get the first crack

00:02:55.679 --> 00:02:59.021
at the wining, the dining and the dancing.
My guys have to wait.

00:02:59.021 --> 00:03:01.454
If it goes the other way
my guys get first crack.

00:03:01.454 --> 00:03:03.390
If it's in the middle it's 50/50.

00:03:03.390 --> 00:03:06.732
This was originally done squatting.
Now we do it standing.

00:03:06.737 --> 00:03:09.765
So the fingers are below the wrist
instead of above.

00:03:09.765 --> 00:03:12.338
But essentially, we have the same position.

00:03:12.338 --> 00:03:15.071
So when the hands lock
if his hand is slightly on top --

00:03:15.071 --> 00:03:17.678
doesn't have to be right on top,
just a little bit.

00:03:17.678 --> 00:03:20.967
I'll get a feeling, at a gut level,
and we think this is hard wired

00:03:20.967 --> 00:03:23.303
because you've never been trained
to decode this.

00:03:23.303 --> 00:03:26.059
But I get a feeling
he's coming on a bit heavy.

00:03:26.059 --> 00:03:29.041
It feels like, yeah,
I think I get dominated here.

00:03:29.041 --> 00:03:30.457
If it goes the other way,

00:03:30.457 --> 00:03:34.394
I feel like I got this sucker
all lined up, haven't I?

00:03:34.394 --> 00:03:36.570
How do you create rapport
with a handshake?

00:03:36.570 --> 00:03:40.558
Here are the two rules.
First keep your hand absolutely straight.

00:03:40.558 --> 00:03:44.147
Second this takes a bit of practice,
particularly if you're female.

00:03:44.147 --> 00:03:47.260
Give the same pressure you receive.

00:03:47.260 --> 00:03:48.580
So on a scale of 1 to 10.

00:03:48.580 --> 00:03:51.049
Let's say that 10 is a really strong one,

00:03:51.049 --> 00:03:55.039
and a 1 is four breakfast sausages. Okay?

00:03:55.039 --> 00:03:56.656
Now let's try it again.

00:03:56.656 --> 00:03:59.860
Okay, on a scale of 1 to 10,
yours is about a 7.

00:03:59.860 --> 00:04:02.748
Mine's about a 7 too.
Therefore, it felt pretty good.

00:04:02.748 --> 00:04:05.290
Neither got the upper hand,
the dominant hand.

00:04:05.290 --> 00:04:08.150
And that's why at a gut level
we both felt pretty good.

00:04:08.150 --> 00:04:10.632
I can see the look on your face.
That felt okay.

00:04:10.632 --> 00:04:12.284
Yeah, that felt good.

00:04:12.284 --> 00:04:14.670
Yeah, that's very good.

00:04:14.670 --> 00:04:17.034
What happens if you meet someone
who's got --

00:04:17.034 --> 00:04:19.951
This time you're going to give me
a 9 and I've only got a 7.

00:04:19.951 --> 00:04:21.514
So give me a 9 on intention.

00:04:21.514 --> 00:04:23.290
Now the hand
will go straight on top.

00:04:23.290 --> 00:04:26.820
I've got to respond with an extra 20%
just to level it up.

00:04:26.820 --> 00:04:29.626
If I don't, he's going to have
one up on me before we start.

00:04:29.626 --> 00:04:33.489
He'll know it and I'll know it,
but not a word's been said. Makes sense?

00:04:33.489 --> 00:04:35.571
Give him a round of applause.
Thank you.

00:04:35.571 --> 00:04:38.070
(Applause)

00:04:39.210 --> 00:04:42.859
There are more connections between
your brain and the palm of your hands

00:04:42.859 --> 00:04:45.021
then any other body part.
Did you know this?

00:04:45.021 --> 00:04:47.969
More connections between the brain
and the palm of the hands.

00:04:47.969 --> 00:04:51.589
Including men, ladies,
then any other body part.

00:04:51.589 --> 00:04:55.357
So clearly, the palms have evolved
as an important part of human brains.

00:04:55.357 --> 00:04:58.729
And they are. They make your bed.
They brush your hair.

00:04:58.729 --> 00:05:03.001
They do small artwork.
They do handshakes. They play the piano.

00:05:03.001 --> 00:05:05.432
They do more things
than most other body parts.

00:05:05.432 --> 00:05:07.941
But here's my question to you.
When you're dealing with people

00:05:07.941 --> 00:05:10.729
where you want to persuade them,
convince them, get them on your side,

00:05:10.729 --> 00:05:13.412
you want them to say "Yes"
to whatever you're proposing.

00:05:13.412 --> 00:05:17.532
Whether it's that job, or a date,
or just get your idea accepted.

00:05:17.532 --> 00:05:19.767
Where are your palms as you're talking?

00:05:19.767 --> 00:05:24.691
This is something that most people
have never considered. Never.

00:05:24.691 --> 00:05:27.786
After this session you'll consider it,
you'll think about it.

00:05:27.786 --> 00:05:31.251
Later today you'll start to realize
why people respond to you

00:05:31.251 --> 00:05:34.157

in the way they do
that you've never thought about.

00:05:34.157 --> 00:05:35.577
Here's what I'm going to do.


00:05:35.577 --> 00:05:38.187
I'm going to say the same thing 
three times.

00:05:38.187 --> 00:05:41.857
I'm going to change 
only what I do with the palms of my hands.

00:05:41.857 --> 00:05:46.501
I'll keep my body fairly still, 
so I'm not using any other body signals.

00:05:46.501 --> 00:05:49.133
And I'll keep my voice
as close to the same as I can.

00:05:49.133 --> 00:05:52.520
I say as close as I can because
when you change your body language,

00:05:52.520 --> 00:05:55.071
it's hard wired to your brain
to change how you sound.

00:05:55.071 --> 00:05:57.277
I'll try to keep it as close as I can.

00:05:57.277 --> 00:06:00.220
And I'll use exactly the same words.
Same instruction 3 times.

00:06:00.220 --> 00:06:02.022
Your task is to decide.

00:06:02.022 --> 00:06:04.731
Do you accept what I'm saying,
or do you reject me?

00:06:04.731 --> 00:06:06.799
You want to fight me or go along with it?

00:06:06.799 --> 00:06:09.140
You want to say Yes or No?

00:06:09.140 --> 00:06:11.387
Okay, clear on this? Here we go.

00:06:11.387 --> 00:06:14.878
First instruction, don't do this.
Just imagine what we're going to do.

00:06:14.878 --> 00:06:17.646
In a moment I'll ask the people
sitting in these seats here,

00:06:17.646 --> 00:06:20.087
I'll ask you to sit on this side
of the room, please.

00:06:20.087 --> 00:06:22.435
And I'll invite the people here
to take their seats.

00:06:22.435 --> 00:06:24.959
Those in the back
come forward to the front.

00:06:24.959 --> 00:06:27.929
And those in the front
can sit anywhere you choose.

00:06:27.929 --> 00:06:30.860
Raise your hand if you feel okay
about what I'm asking.

00:06:30.860 --> 00:06:32.846
Who's Okay? Raise your hand.

00:06:32.846 --> 00:06:35.367
Just about all of you
are prepared to do what I want.

00:06:35.367 --> 00:06:39.019
You don't even know what that is.
But you're prepared to do what I want,

00:06:39.021 --> 00:06:41.864
because you feel like 
I won't threaten you, I won't intimidate you.

00:06:41.864 --> 00:06:44.734
While it might look a bit silly,
this could be a bit of fun.

00:06:44.734 --> 00:06:45.977
That's what our mind's thinking.

00:06:45.977 --> 00:06:48.375
I used a signal that appealed
to your ancient brain.

00:06:48.375 --> 00:06:53.206
Let's try the 2nd instruction. Same words.
Same voice. Changing only the palms.

00:06:53.206 --> 00:06:56.110
I'll ask the people sitting on this side

00:06:56.110 --> 00:06:57.950
I'll invite you to take these seats.

00:06:57.950 --> 00:06:59.643
The people here can sit over here.

00:06:59.643 --> 00:07:01.674
Those at the back come forward please.

00:07:01.674 --> 00:07:05.068
And those at the front
can sit anywhere they like.

00:07:05.068 --> 00:07:08.449
Give me a word that goes with this.
What are you feeling, a word?

00:07:08.449 --> 00:07:10.131
Feel like you're getting an order?

00:07:10.131 --> 00:07:12.640
Raise your hand if you got an order.

00:07:12.640 --> 00:07:16.946
Are you telling me that all I have to do
is change my palms from an upward position

00:07:16.946 --> 00:07:19.947
where you wanted to do anything I wanted
without question.

00:07:19.947 --> 00:07:22.327
I've turned them over
and now you say to yourself,

00:07:22.327 --> 00:07:26.688
Hang on a minute,
this guy is giving me an order.

00:07:26.688 --> 00:07:29.492
Well, maybe I don't want to do that.

00:07:29.492 --> 00:07:31.770
I'm an independent.

00:07:31.770 --> 00:07:33.478
I'll just check it all out.

00:07:33.478 --> 00:07:36.520
Make me laugh, funny guy.

00:07:36.520 --> 00:07:39.738
So now many of you are resisting?
Let's try the third approach.

00:07:39.738 --> 00:07:42.190
I'll ask the people sitting in these seats

00:07:42.190 --> 00:07:44.298
if you come sit on this side please.

00:07:44.298 --> 00:07:46.113
And those people can sit here.

00:07:46.113 --> 00:07:49.439
The back of the room, you can
come forward please. Sit here.

00:07:49.439 --> 00:07:52.325
And those in the front
can go anywhere you like.

00:07:52.325 --> 00:07:54.453
Give me a word that goes with this.

00:07:54.453 --> 00:07:56.545
And not a gesture, a word.

00:07:56.545 --> 00:07:58.730
(Laughter)

00:07:58.730 --> 00:08:00.848
I guess that was a word.

00:08:00.848 --> 00:08:03.199
What are you feeling with this?

00:08:03.199 --> 00:08:05.785
This is more than an order.
This is a directive.

00:08:05.785 --> 00:08:09.741
You have not choice and you're an idiot.

00:08:09.741 --> 00:08:12.408
So we tested this in a very simple way.

00:08:12.408 --> 00:08:14.953
We got an audience
to sit in a room like this.

00:08:14.953 --> 00:08:17.027
We got a speaker to present a proposal.

00:08:17.027 --> 00:08:20.990
In 20 minutes they had to convince
the audience to agree with the proposal.

00:08:20.990 --> 00:08:23.937
The speaker was instructed
to do the same thing 3 times

00:08:23.937 --> 00:08:27.411
with 3 audiences same demographics
we just changed the audiences.

00:08:27.411 --> 00:08:31.650
The first time the speaker spoke
primarily using palm up position.

00:08:31.650 --> 00:08:34.441
That's how the proposal worked.
Here's the bottom line.

00:08:34.441 --> 00:08:35.818
It would work for you, sir.

00:08:35.818 --> 00:08:37.990
It would work in Australia and in America.

00:08:37.990 --> 00:08:40.085
That's the way they did the 1st proposal.

00:08:40.085 --> 00:08:42.774
We moved that audience 
and put a 2nd audience in there.

00:08:42.774 --> 00:08:45.065
Same presentations given
to the same demographics,

00:08:45.065 --> 00:08:47.316
but a different audience, using palm down.

00:08:47.316 --> 00:08:49.056
Here's how the deal works.

00:08:49.056 --> 00:08:50.532
It would work for you and you.

00:08:50.532 --> 00:08:53.661
It would work in the United States
and in Iceland.

00:08:53.661 --> 00:08:55.561
Move that audience, put in a 3rd one,

00:08:55.561 --> 00:08:58.158
they get the same presentation
using finger pointing.

00:08:58.158 --> 00:09:00.249
Here's the way it works
and the bottom line.

00:09:00.249 --> 00:09:05.068
It will work for you, you and you.
And America, Australia and Africa.

00:09:05.068 --> 00:09:08.060
Now we survey all three audiences
looking for two things.

00:09:08.060 --> 00:09:12.594
First, w/ a simple test, how much 
can they recall what the deal was about?

00:09:12.608 --> 00:09:15.432
We were looking for how much 
were they listening to the deal

00:09:15.432 --> 00:09:18.786
as opposed to judging the speaker.

00:09:18.786 --> 00:09:22.142
Secondly, from a list of adjectives
they were asked to pick those

00:09:22.142 --> 00:09:24.968
that best described
how they feel about the speaker.

00:09:24.968 --> 00:09:27.090
You reckon there was any difference?

00:09:27.090 --> 00:09:29.094
You already know the answer, don't you?

00:09:29.094 --> 00:09:31.870
You know the answer already
without ever seeing the results.

00:09:31.870 --> 00:09:35.312
That the palm up speaker
had up to 40% more retention of the deal

00:09:35.312 --> 00:09:36.944
than the palm down speaker.

00:09:36.944 --> 00:09:39.082
Palm up speaker had the best adjectives,


00:09:39.082 --> 00:09:41.190
laid-back, friendly, humorous, engaging.

00:09:41.190 --> 00:09:44.200
Palms turned over, authoritative, 
telling me what to do, pushy.

00:09:44.200 --> 00:09:46.655
When the finger came out,
nobody could remember much

00:09:46.655 --> 00:09:49.156
and they got the worse adjectives
about that person.

00:09:49.156 --> 00:09:51.510
Now here's my question for you.

00:09:51.510 --> 00:09:53.430
What's you prominent position?

00:09:53.430 --> 00:09:56.934
You have a dominant position
of one of these and which is yours?

00:09:56.934 --> 00:09:58.254
People never considered.

00:09:58.254 --> 00:10:01.706
But you've got one that you're using
when you're dealing with others.

00:10:01.706 --> 00:10:04.135
Now is it up, is it over, is it finger?

00:10:04.135 --> 00:10:08.421
We know the palm down,
historically, is a power signal.

00:10:08.421 --> 00:10:12.565
There's 4 times more power
in your hands facing down then up.

00:10:12.565 --> 00:10:15.145
I think the famous example
is Adolph Hitler.

00:10:15.145 --> 00:10:18.056
The Nazi salute with "Heil Hitler".
It freightened everybody.

00:10:18.056 --> 00:10:20.414
How would he have gone
if he had gone Heil Hitler?

00:10:20.414 --> 00:10:23.078
(Laughing)

00:10:23.848 --> 00:10:25.833
Nobody's going to follow Heil Hitler.

00:10:25.833 --> 00:10:29.363
That's scary, that's submission.

00:10:29.363 --> 00:10:31.747
Here's the good news about this.

00:10:31.747 --> 00:10:35.608
You can change and modify
your hand signals with a little practice.

00:10:35.608 --> 00:10:37.397
When you first start to do this --

00:10:37.397 --> 00:10:39.406
What happens if later today or tonight


00:10:39.406 --> 00:10:41.845
you suddenly discover
you're a finger pointer?

00:10:41.845 --> 00:10:45.230
You're talking with your friends
and you've forgotten this session.

00:10:45.230 --> 00:10:48.130
They're watching your hand 
and there it is

00:10:48.130 --> 00:10:51.682
hitting these silly idiots on the head
knocking them into submission.

00:10:51.682 --> 00:10:53.309
The thing about body language,

00:10:53.309 --> 00:10:55.926
it's an outward reflection
of your emotional condition.

00:10:55.926 --> 00:10:58.133
All body language shows 
is how you're feeling.

00:10:58.133 --> 00:11:01.627
Whatever attitude or emotional you're
feeling is likely to be reflected

00:11:01.627 --> 00:11:03.301
in gesture, movement or posture.

00:11:03.301 --> 00:11:04.966
Now the reverse is true as well.

00:11:04.966 --> 00:11:07.809
If you intentionally take
certain positions or postures,

00:11:07.809 --> 00:11:10.479
you'll start to feel the emotions 
that go with it.

00:11:10.479 --> 00:11:12.955
For example, everybody copy this.

00:11:12.955 --> 00:11:15.873
Like a form of praying,
just lightly tap it back and forth.

00:11:15.873 --> 00:11:19.753
Put a little smile on your face.
No teeth.

00:11:19.753 --> 00:11:23.038
Call that your attitude.
How do you feel when you do this?

00:11:23.038 --> 00:11:24.754
Yeah, you're hatching a good plan.

00:11:24.754 --> 00:11:26.808
You're pretty smart. You are in charge.

00:11:26.808 --> 00:11:28.515
The word for this is confidence.

00:11:28.515 --> 00:11:31.660
If you're feeling confident,
like I know what I'm talking about.

00:11:31.660 --> 00:11:33.317
I'm in charge. I'm an expert.

00:11:33.317 --> 00:11:35.981
This one that may appear.
You may unconsciously use it.

00:11:35.981 --> 00:11:37.485
But if you intentionally use this

00:11:37.485 --> 00:11:40.827
in situations where you're feeling tense
or nervous, it does two things.

00:11:40.827 --> 00:11:43.786
First, when you intentionally 
make the gesture as you just did

00:11:43.786 --> 00:11:48.645
you start to feel more confident,
in charge.

00:11:48.645 --> 00:11:50.985
(Sighs)
I'm in charge of my emotions.

00:11:50.985 --> 00:11:54.369
Importantly, the person who sees you do it,
gets a feeling

00:11:54.369 --> 00:11:56.743
you seem to know what you're about.

00:11:56.743 --> 00:11:59.879
You know, when I first met that guy
or that woman,

00:11:59.879 --> 00:12:01.981
they just seem to have
a confident attitude.

00:12:01.981 --> 00:12:05.196
Well no, they're probably intentionally
doing this to create that ---

00:12:05.196 --> 00:12:07.877
to reassure themselves
and to make you feel good.

00:12:07.877 --> 00:12:10.150
Fake it until you make it.

00:12:10.150 --> 00:12:12.484
If you keep doing this
as part of your repertoire

00:12:12.484 --> 00:12:15.318
eventually when you do this,
you will feel confident

00:12:15.318 --> 00:12:17.916
about what you're talking about,
even when you don't.

00:12:17.916 --> 00:12:19.962
So you can go into politics.

00:12:19.962 --> 00:12:21.812
(Laughter)

00:12:24.282 --> 00:12:25.860
Here's my question for you.

00:12:25.860 --> 00:12:29.421
What is your dominant position?
Palm up, palm over or finger pointing?

00:12:29.421 --> 00:12:33.143
Think about life today, 
business and personal relationships.

00:12:33.143 --> 00:12:36.205
It's all first about people.
Does somebody buy you?

00:12:36.217 --> 00:12:38.980
If somebody buys you,
particularly the first 4-minutes,

00:12:38.980 --> 00:12:41.483
they're forming up to 90%
of their opinion about you.

00:12:41.483 --> 00:12:45.029
If they buy you, there's a good chance
they'll buy whatever goes with you.

00:12:45.029 --> 00:12:48.217
What goes with you
is what you want them to do.

00:12:48.217 --> 00:12:49.755
The other thing is also true.

00:12:49.755 --> 00:12:53.130
If they don't buy you, they're not going
to buy whatever goes with you.

00:12:53.130 --> 00:12:54.869
Even if it's a good idea.

00:12:54.869 --> 00:12:57.966
Without that connection,
they feel that you don't like them,

00:12:57.966 --> 00:12:59.670
or you're threatening or intimidating.

00:12:59.670 --> 00:13:03.426
Suddenly, they just don't want to say yes
to whatever you're suggesting,

00:13:03.426 --> 00:13:05.638
even if this is a good idea.

00:13:05.638 --> 00:13:08.932
So you can practice palms up
where you want to get cooperation.

00:13:08.932 --> 00:13:11.121
Sometimes you might want
a bit of authority.

00:13:11.121 --> 00:13:13.050
You'll turn the palms over.

00:13:13.050 --> 00:13:15.919
If the fire alarm went off
in this building, I would say,

00:13:15.919 --> 00:13:19.822
"Now here's what we're going to do.
We're going to go by that exit --

00:13:19.822 --> 00:13:22.610
I wouldn't say, "Here's what we
need to do. We're ---"

00:13:22.610 --> 00:13:26.662
Because it would be 
every man for himself if I did this.

00:13:26.662 --> 00:13:30.188
So, by intentionally practicing positions--
suddenly, with the palm up,

00:13:30.188 --> 00:13:33.571
you'll find that people start feeling
like they're drawn to you.

00:13:33.571 --> 00:13:35.846
In fact as we've been talking


00:13:35.846 --> 00:13:39.045
I've been doing the Obama hug.

00:13:39.045 --> 00:13:41.235
We want to help the Americans.

00:13:41.235 --> 00:13:43.438
We want you to come here.

00:13:43.438 --> 00:13:46.830
Yeah, we love you.
Like your Mom or Dad cuddling you.

00:13:46.830 --> 00:13:48.436
Like his predecessor who said

00:13:48.436 --> 00:13:50.506
We want to help everybody.
We want to help.

00:13:50.506 --> 00:13:52.830
You, you and you!

00:13:56.130 --> 00:13:59.319
Body language
is an outward reflection of emotions.

00:13:59.319 --> 00:14:02.940
If you intentionally take
certain positions and practice them,

00:14:02.940 --> 00:14:06.005
it suddenly changes
how people perceive you

00:14:06.005 --> 00:14:08.051
and it changes your own physiology.

00:14:08.051 --> 00:14:11.325
You start to feel different
about yourself. That's the great thing.

00:14:11.325 --> 00:14:12.737
You can do things on purpose

00:14:12.737 --> 00:14:15.684
which gives you a better chance
of getting a "Yes" to the job,

00:14:15.684 --> 00:14:20.028
to the proposal, to the idea,
to the date. Or better.

00:14:21.547 --> 00:14:25.244
(Applause)