WEBVTT

00:00:03.538 --> 00:00:04.364
David!

00:00:05.855 --> 00:00:07.529
David! Come on! Get out here!

00:00:07.529 --> 00:00:08.209
It’s ready.

00:00:15.775 --> 00:00:16.526
Do you have it all?

00:00:16.642 --> 00:00:17.074
Yes.

00:00:17.132 --> 00:00:17.498
Sure?

00:00:18.080 --> 00:00:19.129
Shoot! Wait!

00:00:19.467 --> 00:00:20.868
Hurry up! You have a mind like a sieve.

00:00:26.561 --> 00:00:28.129
Dude, what are you doing?! 


00:00:28.812 --> 00:00:29.892
I’m going to take a bath.


00:00:29.892 --> 00:00:31.063
With Carbonell?!

00:00:31.063 --> 00:00:33.044
Of course, I won’t bath by myself! 


00:00:33.754 --> 00:00:35.107
I’ve done it my whole life.

00:00:35.754 --> 00:00:36.605
Carbonell!

00:00:37.529 --> 00:00:40.156
Oh! These little nuts!

00:00:40.257 --> 00:00:42.826
Come on! Stop that, Carbonell!


00:00:43.240 --> 00:00:44.395
All cleaned!

00:01:09.983 --> 00:01:13.615
(WHISPER)

00:01:13.656 --> 00:01:17.629

(SCREAM)

00:01:18.891 --> 00:01:21.236
This movie scares the hell out of me!

00:01:21.506 --> 00:01:22.477
Aren’t you scared?

00:01:23.016 --> 00:01:24.276
No, no, no, no, no, no...

00:01:24.276 --> 00:01:25.535
Actually, as an actor I am aware

00:01:25.535 --> 00:01:27.956
that everything I watch is pure fiction.

00:01:27.956 --> 00:01:30.060
I mean... I focus on technical aspects

00:01:30.060 --> 00:01:31.219
rather than the plot.

00:01:31.219 --> 00:01:33.389
In short: I’m not likely to get scared.

00:01:34.460 --> 00:01:35.428
Right.

00:01:35.562 --> 00:01:37.576
That’s why you are hiding behind a pillow

00:01:38.572 --> 00:01:41.465
I've watched The Changeling many times but...

00:01:41.511 --> 00:01:43.277
I still get scared every time.

00:01:43.328 --> 00:01:44.529
The same thing happens to me

00:01:44.529 --> 00:01:46.429
with Planet of the Apes.

00:01:46.544 --> 00:01:48.864
Planet of the Apes scares you, really?

00:01:49.518 --> 00:01:51.351
No, but I’ve watched it a lot


00:01:51.351 --> 00:01:53.587
and I keep loving it every time.

00:01:53.587 --> 00:01:54.394
What does that have to do with this?

00:01:54.394 --> 00:01:55.580
I don’t understand why are you talking

00:01:55.580 --> 00:01:57.490
about Planet of the Apes now, but whatever.

00:01:57.512 --> 00:01:59.072
It doesn’t have anything to do with this. 


00:01:59.126 --> 00:02:00.066
But I like that movie.

00:02:00.653 --> 00:02:02.236
Cause I’m a fan of Charlon Heston.

00:02:03.095 --> 00:02:04.252
Charlon Heston?

00:02:04.764 --> 00:02:06.626
But he is from a long ago. He is ancient!

00:02:11.531 --> 00:02:11.880
Hey!

00:02:13.474 --> 00:02:14.878
Aren't you leaving?

00:02:15.089 --> 00:02:16.309
Oh, yes, yes.

00:02:17.038 --> 00:02:18.169
I’m leaving.

00:02:20.540 --> 00:02:21.267
David.

00:02:23.028 --> 00:02:25.009
Could you walk me to the door?

00:02:25.602 --> 00:02:27.440
After this I don’t feel like going alone.

00:02:27.499 --> 00:02:29.095
You’re right. It scared me to death!


00:02:29.709 --> 00:02:31.058
No, I'm not afraid.

00:02:31.058 --> 00:02:32.821
It just disturbed me a little.

00:02:33.251 --> 00:02:34.935
And knowing that it is a true story

00:02:35.221 --> 00:02:36.183
Is it?


00:02:36.183 --> 00:02:37.056
Damn Emma.

00:02:37.056 --> 00:02:38.712
You also have some stairs.

00:02:38.712 --> 00:02:41.152
(LAUGHS)

00:02:41.622 --> 00:02:43.882
Can I sleep with you, guys?

00:02:44.733 --> 00:02:46.128
(SCREAM)

00:02:48.043 --> 00:02:49.749
What’s going on? Aren’t we going to bed?


00:02:50.165 --> 00:02:51.373
I was just asking David


00:02:51.373 --> 00:02:52.422
if I could stay with you tonight.

00:02:52.422 --> 00:02:53.623
Of course Emma. Of course you can.

00:02:53.623 --> 00:02:54.564
Any time.

00:02:54.564 --> 00:02:55.980
What do you mean any time?

00:02:55.980 --> 00:02:57.134
We only have two beds!

00:02:57.244 --> 00:02:58.795
Oh! I don’t mind sleeping on the couch.

00:02:58.795 --> 00:03:00.306
No way! You can’t sleep on the couch.


00:03:00.306 --> 00:03:01.866
The springs will hurt your back.

00:03:02.376 --> 00:03:03.585
You sleep in my bed.

00:03:05.876 --> 00:03:07.217
Oh, okay.

00:03:07.217 --> 00:03:07.837
So you sleep on the couch.

00:03:07.837 --> 00:03:08.552
No, no. I’ll sleep in my bed.


00:03:09.951 --> 00:03:10.659
Both of you?

00:03:11.910 --> 00:03:12.451
Dude,

00:03:12.451 --> 00:03:14.480
my bed is extra large and super wide.

00:03:14.480 --> 00:03:15.733
You know cause I’m tall and everything.

00:03:15.733 --> 00:03:16.791
We’ll sleep perfectly well together.

00:03:16.791 --> 00:03:17.912
Fine by me. 


00:03:17.912 --> 00:03:18.976
The bed, the couch...

00:03:18.976 --> 00:03:19.910
or the kitchen’s countertop.

00:03:19.910 --> 00:03:21.148
Just don’t make me go home by myself.

00:03:21.290 --> 00:03:24.105
No, no Emma. I’ll sleep on the couch. 


00:03:24.105 --> 00:03:25.915
You can sleep in my bed.

00:03:25.923 --> 00:03:28.092
Thank you so much!

00:03:33.129 --> 00:03:34.165
Lopez

00:03:34.165 --> 00:03:35.708
this chick didn’t mind sleeping with me.

00:03:35.708 --> 00:03:37.186
You screwed me up, man.

00:03:37.935 --> 00:03:39.424
Listen buddy,

00:03:39.434 --> 00:03:41.551
either all of us get laid or no one does.

00:03:42.268 --> 00:03:43.744
Now.

00:03:43.744 --> 00:03:45.546
Choose, heads or tails?

00:03:45.558 --> 00:03:47.105
What?


00:03:47.105 --> 00:03:48.464
Let’s see who sleeps on the couch.


00:03:48.464 --> 00:03:49.726
(LAUGHS)

00:03:49.726 --> 00:03:50.936
No way, buddy.

00:03:50.936 --> 00:03:51.986
You sleep on the couch. 


00:03:51.986 --> 00:03:53.908
Not only you screw me up with this chick,

00:03:53.908 --> 00:03:56.097
you also want me to sleep on the couch?

00:03:56.097 --> 00:03:57.867
Go suck a lemon, man!

00:04:07.229 --> 00:04:09.718
Bon cop de falç!

00:04:10.118 --> 00:04:11.680
Good morning!

00:04:12.080 --> 00:04:12.910
Good morning.

00:04:12.910 --> 00:04:13.868
Carbonell!

00:04:13.868 --> 00:04:15.281
I leave my dirty clothes in the basket.


00:04:15.281 --> 00:04:17.760
I left your ironed clothes on the chair!


00:04:18.561 --> 00:04:20.391
You don’t look good, Lopez.

00:04:20.980 --> 00:04:23.021
Didn’t you sleep well? (LAUGHS)

00:04:23.860 --> 00:04:25.621
I see someone is being funny today, huh?


00:04:26.422 --> 00:04:35.841
(SINGS)

00:04:36.054 --> 00:04:36.742
Damn, man.

00:04:36.742 --> 00:04:38.331
What a meal!

00:04:38.331 --> 00:04:40.235
Does she always cook you like this?

00:04:40.547 --> 00:04:42.632
Breakfast is the most important meal of the day.

00:04:42.632 --> 00:04:44.225
Carbonell knows it well.

00:04:45.095 --> 00:04:45.775
Done.

00:04:47.265 --> 00:04:48.536
You don’t want anymore?!


00:04:48.743 --> 00:04:50.586
Carbonell! Here I leave my dirty dishes!

00:04:50.586 --> 00:04:52.238
Ok, I’ll wash them now!


00:04:52.245 --> 00:04:54.024
And couldn’t she wash mine too?

00:04:54.024 --> 00:04:54.900
Huh?

00:04:54.900 --> 00:04:56.017
No… Excuse me.

00:04:56.017 --> 00:04:56.716
But I don't know

00:04:56.716 --> 00:04:57.878
what the hell is this woman doing here!

00:04:57.878 --> 00:04:58.988
Lopez, you know it.

00:04:58.988 --> 00:05:00.299
She’s my housemaid.


00:05:00.299 --> 00:05:01.348
Well, then, dude.


00:05:01.348 --> 00:05:02.447
Either she’s the housemaid of both of us

00:05:02.447 --> 00:05:04.229
or she can get the hell out of here!

00:05:04.229 --> 00:05:04.971
Wait, wait, Lopez. Stay calm.

00:05:04.971 --> 00:05:07.698
Look, put your dirty clothes in my basket

00:05:07.698 --> 00:05:08.979
and don’t say anything.

00:05:08.979 --> 00:05:10.610
You’ll see how she washes them, OK?


00:05:10.610 --> 00:05:11.929
Hey!

00:05:11.929 --> 00:05:14.762
And my dirty dishes as well?

00:05:14.762 --> 00:05:16.399
And the dishes as well.

00:05:16.399 --> 00:05:17.201
But remember: be careful!

00:05:17.201 --> 00:05:19.535
She would get really mad if she noticed

00:05:19.535 --> 00:05:20.572
And keep in mind

00:05:20.572 --> 00:05:22.923
that she is a huge fan of guns.

00:05:22.923 --> 00:05:25.570
Of guns? What is he talking about?

00:05:55.777 --> 00:05:57.375
Carbonell, what is this?


00:05:57.698 --> 00:05:59.336
I was cleaning the magazines 


00:05:59.336 --> 00:06:01.097
and I saw I had a hole in the holster.

00:06:02.898 --> 00:06:04.087
The magazines? What the…?

00:06:04.087 --> 00:06:06.278
And now I’ve lost the trigger

00:06:06.278 --> 00:06:08.608
and the flash suppressor.

00:06:08.958 --> 00:06:10.699
(YELLS)

00:06:11.358 --> 00:06:14.217
Did you do military service, Carbonell?


00:06:14.677 --> 00:06:15.740
Oh, my dear.

00:06:16.320 --> 00:06:17.594
I wish.

00:06:17.594 --> 00:06:18.960
But they didn’t let me.

00:06:19.566 --> 00:06:21.491
Because you are a woman.

00:06:21.502 --> 00:06:23.641
Because I am too violent.

00:06:25.141 --> 00:06:27.690
Hey, there are a lot of chicks here!

00:06:27.690 --> 00:06:29.139
Yes, that’s right.

00:06:29.139 --> 00:06:31.508
Cool. And they’re really hot!

00:06:31.508 --> 00:06:32.562
(LAUGHS)

00:06:32.562 --> 00:06:33.652
You think?

00:06:33.652 --> 00:06:35.561
Check out that one with the leggings, dude.

00:06:35.561 --> 00:06:38.529
I don’t think she’s wearing any panties.

00:06:40.783 --> 00:06:42.033
Isn’t she?

00:06:42.060 --> 00:06:43.917
Phew, there are so many babes here…

00:06:43.917 --> 00:06:46.963
Look at that one, she’s so hot.

00:06:46.974 --> 00:06:48.214
(LAUGHS)

00:06:48.214 --> 00:06:51.426
Well, I’m homosexual.

00:06:52.513 --> 00:06:54.607
Look at that guy, what an ass…


00:06:55.856 --> 00:06:57.375
What are you talking about?

00:06:57.375 --> 00:06:59.188
No, I… I don’t know, dude. I…


00:06:59.188 --> 00:07:01.126
Hey, dude, easy, OK? No problem.

00:07:01.126 --> 00:07:02.617
Everyone is different.

00:07:02.617 --> 00:07:03.427
No, no. But listen.

00:07:03.427 --> 00:07:05.406
If I didn’t like chicks so much,

00:07:05.406 --> 00:07:07.131
I’d be homosexual.


00:07:07.828 --> 00:07:09.389
I mean, I got the calling,

00:07:09.389 --> 00:07:11.146
but I like chicks.

00:07:11.787 --> 00:07:12.460
Don’t rush it.

00:07:12.460 --> 00:07:13.899
If you like guys,

00:07:13.899 --> 00:07:15.238
you’ll figure it out, OK?

00:07:15.238 --> 00:07:16.091
You will discover it.

00:07:16.091 --> 00:07:16.798
No, no. 


00:07:16.798 --> 00:07:17.904
I've discovered it: I like chicks.

00:07:18.484 --> 00:07:19.817
The problem is that, I don’t know.

00:07:19.817 --> 00:07:21.078
They are so weird.

00:07:21.078 --> 00:07:21.919
You never know

00:07:21.919 --> 00:07:23.139
if they want to hook up or not.

00:07:23.139 --> 00:07:24.463
Yeah, I know.

00:07:24.463 --> 00:07:26.698
Among guys it is a lot easier.

00:07:27.018 --> 00:07:27.802
You're lucky, dude.

00:07:27.802 --> 00:07:28.952
That’s being mature.

00:07:28.964 --> 00:07:29.901
No, it’s not being mature.

00:07:29.901 --> 00:07:31.303
It’s being constantly horny.


00:07:31.670 --> 00:07:34.294
Yeah, but I’m also constantly horny and…

00:07:34.294 --> 00:07:35.522
Listen, just yesterday,

00:07:35.522 --> 00:07:37.312
Emma stayed at home for the night.

00:07:37.312 --> 00:07:40.014
And I wouldn’t have minded... you know?

00:07:40.014 --> 00:07:41.674
However, she just wanted to sleep.


00:07:42.067 --> 00:07:43.244
Yeah, sure.

00:07:43.244 --> 00:07:44.883
That’s why she stayed with you.

00:07:44.883 --> 00:07:46.113
Because she wanted to sleep.

00:07:46.113 --> 00:07:47.666
Dude, you’re dumb.

00:07:47.845 --> 00:07:49.426
Huh? What do you mean?

00:07:49.426 --> 00:07:52.194
What do you think I mean? I think Emma...

00:07:52.194 --> 00:07:54.855
is a really open-minded chick.

00:07:54.855 --> 00:07:57.385
Very very modern.

00:07:57.404 --> 00:07:58.417
Maybe she wanted

00:07:58.417 --> 00:08:00.989
to hook up with Lopez and you all at once


00:08:02.186 --> 00:08:03.706
She wanted to have a threesome!

00:08:03.726 --> 00:08:04.927
It’s so obvious!

00:08:04.927 --> 00:08:05.933
Now that you mention it

00:08:05.943 --> 00:08:08.827
it is obvious! But at that moment…