Nobody knows what white people eat.

You've been very good at keeping that shit a secret amongst yourselves.

[Laughter, applause]

I study white people. You don't know that, I'm writing a paper on you!

[Laughter]

Not even for school, nigga, just to do it! Just to get, just doin'

an independent research. I'm spendin' my money. That's why I'm working so hard.

[Laughter]

I follow you around grocery stores. They freak out!

I just try to peek in the cart, they always say - 'Get away from my

cart, nigga, what are you looking at?'

[Laughter]

'Chicken and giblets are over there!'

'You must be lost! These are vegetables!'

[Laughter]

I know what you drink. See how quiet it got?

[Laughter]

Grape juice. Surprise, motherfuckers! You didn't know I knew about grape juice, did you?

Ohh! Don't play dumb with me! Look at 'em, huh? What is it?

A lot of black people don't have the privilege of knowing about grape juice

because they have grape drink. It's not the same formula that you get.

[Laughter, applause]

Ain't no vitamins in that shit!

You might have one of your black friends over -

'Todd? Todd? Would you care for a glass of grape juice?'

'What?'

'Nigga what the fuck is juice?'

'I want some grape drink, baby!'

[Laughter]

'Mmm, it's purple.'

[Laughter]

'I don't think I know what a grape drink is.'

'WHAT?'

'I have some apple juice if you want.'

'What the fuck is juice?'

[Laughter]

'I want some apple drink!'

[Laughter]

'It's greeeeen!'

[Laughter]

Remember that commercial for Sunny Delight when all the kids run in from playin'?

And they all run to the fridge - 'All right, I got some purple stuff, some Sunny D.

As soon as he said Sunny D all the kids go -

'YEAH!'

[Laughter]

Watch the black kid in the back. If you ever see that commercial again -

look at that black kid - he be like, 'I want that purple stuff!'

[Laughter]

That's drink, nigga! That is drink!

[Laughter, applause]

They want - they want drink.

Don't want all them vitamins, nigga! I want drink! Sugar, water, purple.

[Laughter]

That's the ingredients - sugar, water,

and of course, purple!

[Laughter]

It's too fuckin' much. I got a lot of things to talk about tonight.