WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:07.818 (Introduction music plays) 00:00:08.198 --> 00:00:09.956 Hello brains! 00:00:10.513 --> 00:00:13.472 I say that to you because... if you think about it. 00:00:13.522 --> 00:00:16.302 It wasn't really you that decided to come here today. 00:00:16.302 --> 00:00:18.142 It was your brain. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 And whether you decided to walk or drive, take a taxi, ride a bike 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 That decision was decided by your brain. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Behavior, all behavior, is affected by your brain. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 This is a story about my brain. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 So, I was a smart kid. By 18 months I was speaking in full sentences. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 By third grade I was scoring post high school on standardized tests. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I had as all my teacher's agreed, so much potential. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I was also struggling. I didn't have many... any friends. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Outside of books. I was easily overwhelmed. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I spaced out in class. I lost things, constantly. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 And trying to get my brain to focus on something I wasn't excited about... 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 was like trying to nail Jell-O to the wall. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 But I was smart. So nobody was worried. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 It wasn't until middle school when I was responsible for 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 getting myself to classes on time, and remembering to bring my own homework. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 That being smart wasn't enough anymore, and my grades started to suffer. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 My mom took me to the doctor and after a comprehensive evaluation. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I was diagnosed with attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 ADHD. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 If you're not familiar with ADHD it has three primary characteristics. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Inattention, impulsivity, and hyperactivity. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Some people with ADHD have more of the inattentive presentation. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Those are the daydreamers, the space cadets. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Some have more of the hyperactive/impulsive presentation. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Those are the kids that usually get diagnosed early. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 But, the most common presentation is a combination of both. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 My doctor and my parents decided that given my shiny new diagnosis. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Maybe stimulant medication would succeed, where spankings and lectures had failed. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 So I tried it. And it worked. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 The first time I took my medication it was like putting on glasses. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 And realizing I could see, without squinting. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I could focus! 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Without changing anything my GPA went up a full point. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Honestly it was kind of miraculous. By 14 I had friends, that liked me. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 By 15 I had published my first poem. I got a boyfriend. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 By 17 I knew I wanted to be a journalist. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 My local college had a program that would guarantee admission to USC. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 They had a really great journalism program. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 So, I signed up at my local college and I started taking classes. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I moved in with my boyfriend. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Things were going great! ...until they weren't. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I started having trouble making it to class on time. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I aced a statistics course, but I forgot to sign up in time. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 So, I never got the credit. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I took classes so I could help my boyfriend with his career. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 But I completely lost sight of mine. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I never made it to USC... 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 By 21 I dropped out of college and moved back home. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Over the next ten years I started and quit, or was fired from 15 jobs. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I ruined my credit. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I got married! And was divorced within a year. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 At this point I was 32, and I had no idea what I was doing with my life. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Besides reading self-help books that didn't seem to be helping. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 What happened to all that potential? Was I not trying? 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 No, I worked harder than anyone I knew, I didn't even have time for friends. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I was that busy. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I had potential, though... 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 So my failure was clearly my fault. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I just hadn't done what I needed to do to reach it and honestly.... 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I was tired of trying, putting more effort into life than everyone else. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 And falling farther and farther behind. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 At this point I could have given up on myself. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I could have decided that everyone who thought I had potential, was wrong. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 But, I didn't, because I knew that it was my behavior that had gotten me here. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 And behavior is affected by the brain. And my brain has ADHD. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Looking at my behavior I knew... 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Even with medication, even as an adult. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 My ADHD was still interfering with my life. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 What I needed to know was how, and why. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 And more importantly, what could I do about it. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I started to do some research. And I found a lot of great information. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I found a lot of bad information too, but that's another talk. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 But there's good information out there. Websites, podcasts, 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 talks, by researchers and medical professionals. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Books that would of been way more helpful than the self-help books I've been using. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 That were clearly written for normal... well, there is no normal. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Neurotypical brains. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 A lot of what I found though was either really technical. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Or seemed like it was written for parents, and teachers trying to deal with ADHD kids 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 There wasn't a lot that seemed to be intended for us, the people who have ADHD. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 So, I started a YouTube channel. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I had no idea how to start a YouTube channel. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 But, I started a YouTube channel 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I almost called it "How Not To ADHD" because that was all I knew at the time. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 But my boyfriend, Edward, talked me out of it. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 It turns out lots of people need help understanding ADHD. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Including, maybe especially, those who actually have it. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I was no exception. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I thought having ADHD was kind of the same for everybody. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I thought it was mostly about getting distracted. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I thought that maybe having ADHD was the reason that I was failing at life. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 And I thought I was what needed to change in order to be successful. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I couldn't be successful, and still be me. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Spoilers. I was wrong. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 So, lets go back for a second. Back to what brought us here today 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 The brain. Understanding the brain you're 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 working with, it turns out is kind of important. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 And, that's true whether that brain is your employees, your students, 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 your kids, your significant others, or your own. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 ADHD affects between 5 and 8% of the global population. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Which means statistically speaking there's between 37 and 60 of us just in this room. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 You can't tell who we are just by looking but its fun to watch you try. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 (Laughter) 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 So at some point you're going to meet someone with ADHD. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Work with them, give birth to them, or fall in love with them. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Chances are you already have. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 And at some point, you're going to ask yourself. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 What is going on in their brain? 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 So, after two years of learning about ADHD and a lifetime of experience with it 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 After having the honor of connecting with researchers, and doctors, and ADHD experts 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 and tens of thousands of ADHD brains all over the world. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 What can I tell you, to help you understand ADHD? 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 By the way, many of them helped with this talk. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 First of all its real. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 It's not bad parenting or lack of discipline. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 ADHD is a neurodevelopmental disorder. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 It's currently the most well researched mental condition. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 And, there are actually measurable differences in the brain. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 These differences are larger in children, but for most people they never go away. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 In other words, adults have ADHD too. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 While rates of the ADHD diagnosis are increasing. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 It's not because of an increase in sugar, or technology. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Or... lack of spanking. It's not. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Anymore than people drowning in swimming pools is because of Nicholas Cage 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Correlation does not equal causation. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Those are real numbers. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 (Audience laughter) 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 It's from both an increase in understanding that ADHD exists. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 That girls, adults, and gifted students can have it too. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 And ironically a lack of understanding that being hyper, misbehaving, 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 or struggling in school does not mean that you have ADHD. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 ADHD is more serious than I realized. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 The primary characteristics of inattention impulsivity, and hyperactivity. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Don't sound all that serious, and I didn't think that they were. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 But in real life they translate into people getting into more accidents. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Being more likely to get fired, get divorced. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Significantly more likely to struggle with addiction. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I learned that ADHD is on a spectrum. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Raise your hand if you've ever lost your keys. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Or spaced out in the middle of a lecture. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 If you're not raising your hand I'm going to assume you spaced out 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 in the middle of this one. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 (Audience laughter) 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 The thing is while everyone experiences ADHD symptoms sometimes. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 An actual diagnosis is based on how many of those symptoms significantly, 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 and chronically impair multiple aspects of your life. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Just like you can get sad and not have depression. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 You can get distracted and not have ADHD. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 And just like you can have mild depression, or severe depression. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 ADHD can range from mild to severe. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I also learned ADHD is a terrible name for ADHD. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 It creates a lot of confusion. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 We don't have a deficit of attention. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 What we have trouble with is regulating our attention. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 As ADHD coach Brett Thornhill puts it, it's like your brain keeps switching 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 between 30 different channels, and somebody else has the remote. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Sometimes we have a hard time focusing at all. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 And other times we get stuck on a channel, and can't pull ourselves away. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 In real life this might look like we just don't want to do homework because we'de 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 rather play video games, and sure sometimes that's the case. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 But, the truth is, there are plenty of times we want to be able to focus, we try. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 And we just can't. Current understanding is 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 that this difficulty has to do with the way our brains produce, 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 and metabolize neurotransmitters, like dopamine, and norepinephrine. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I learned ADHD is highly treatable. Stimulant medication boosts 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 these neurotransmitters, Which is why it helps us focus. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 It's very effective for around 80%, of people with ADHD. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 And I learned that medication isn't enough. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 ADHD affects much more than our focus, it impairs executive functions 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 like planning, prioritizing and the ability to sustain effort towards a goal. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 It affects our ability to regulate our emotions, our behavior, our sleep. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 It's not one program in our brain that it works differently. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 It's the whole operating system. It can effect every aspect of our lives. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 And there are a ton of strategies out there, that can help. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Cognitive Behavior Therapy, coaching, even meditation, 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 or regular exercise can make a huge difference. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Understanding your brain. I knew I had trouble focusing, 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 and I knew my medication helped with that. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 What I didn't know was that getting overwhelmed all the time had to do 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 with poor working memory. And that making lists helps. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Or that the reason that I ran late all the time isn't because I didn't care. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 ADHDer's have a skewed sense of time. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 And that using a timer could teach me how long thing's actually take. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Mostly, I expected to learn what I actually learned. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 That ADHD is real. Addressing it is important. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 And medication is not enough. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 What I didn't expect to learn that I wasn't alone. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I had an ADHD tribe. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 What a difference it would make to connect with it. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 There are people with ADHD in every country, every culture across the globe. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Yes, even in France. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 (Delayed laughter) 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 And this tribe is awesome. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Comparing myself to people with neurotypical brains, 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I felt really bad about myself. Why couldn't I keep my house clean? 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Or, finish a project in time instead of waiting until the very last second. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 But seeing the positive in fellow ADHD brains. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Helped me recognize, and appreciate my own strenths. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 One's that I couldn't see when I was just staring at my weaknesses. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Which is what I had been doing for decades. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 But ADHD, ADHD brains have a lot to offer the world. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 We tend to be generous, funny, creative. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 ADHDer's are 300% more likely to start their own business. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 We not only think outside the box. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 We're often not even aware there is a box. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 (Audience laughter) 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 We may struggle when our brains aren't engaged. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 But ADHD brains are great at tackling tasks that are urgent. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Working with ideas that are new. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Wrestling with problems that are challenging. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 And dedicating themselves to projects that are of personal interest. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 This YouTube career I'd stumbled into was all of those things. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 At 32 I was divorced, miserable and had no idea what I was doing with my life. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 At 33 I started my own business and was connecting with ADHD experts. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 By now, at 34 I have a team of volunteers helping me with the channel. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 And I'm engaged to this amazing man, who helps me produce the channel. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Works right alongside with me is doing the slides right now. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 And as we discovered also has ADHD. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 (Audience laughter) 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I'm working on reaching out to schools so that kids don't have to wait 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 until they're 32 to learn about their brains. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 And I'm doing my very first Ted X talk here with you today. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 (Audience applause) 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 But wait there's more. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 That did sound like the end of the speech. I'm sorry it's not. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I'm happier and more successful than I've ever been in my life. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 So what happened? How did I reach my potential? 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Three things. One I learned about my brain. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 My ADHD brain both on my own and by connecting with others who have it. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 If you judge a fish by it's ability to climb a tree. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 It will live it's whole life believing that it is stupid. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Unless it happens to chat with another fish. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 And realizes fish aren't great at climbing trees. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 And that's okay. There's plenty of ocean. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Two, In learning about my brain I found and stumbled into a job that engages it. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 If you spend all your time trying to get a fish to be able to climb a tree, 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 you'll never see how far it can swim. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 It turns out, I can be me and still be successful. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I just had to find my ocean. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Three, I learned strategies for the challenges I still face. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I have no fish analogy for this one. I am sorry. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I guess I learned how to swim. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Once you know what your brains challenges are. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 You can find solutions to them. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Once you look past the stereotypes and assumptions about people with ADHD. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 And dig deeper. You learn what ADHD actually is. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 It's not people who wont stop fidgeting, or getting distracted. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 It's brains that are chronically under aroused. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Trying to get the basic stimulation that all brains need. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 It's not about procrastinating or not caring. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 It's having executive function deficits that make it hard to get started. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 And it's not people being lazy, or not trying enough. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 It's kids and adults struggling to succeed with a brain that doesn't 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 always want to cooperate. In a society that wasn't built for them. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Society is our user's manual. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 We learn how our brains and bodies work by watching those around us. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 When yours works differently, it can feel like you're broken. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 So what I'm trying to do, is reach out to these people. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Wherever they are in the world, and tell them you are not weird. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 You are not stupid. You do not need to try harder. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 You are not a failed version of normal. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 You are different, you are beautiful, and you are not alone. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 If you don't have ADHD yourself chances are you know somebody who does. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 Their your employee, your boss, your friend, they're in this room. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 I hope this talk helps you understand them better. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 If you do have ADHD. Welcome to the tribe. 99:59:59.999 --> 99:59:59.999 (Audience applause)