1 00:02:07,300 --> 00:02:16,600 Dear respected Thay, dear brothers and sisters, dear friends, today is the 26th 2 00:02:16,600 --> 00:02:23,950 of November 2017 we are in the Stillwater meditation hall of the Upper 3 00:02:23,950 --> 00:02:34,750 Hamlet, Plum village and we'll continue with the theme the seven factors 4 00:02:34,750 --> 00:02:49,980 of awakening, of enlightenment. I'm always really fascinated by this theme 5 00:02:49,980 --> 00:03:01,720 enlightenment because I I feel that there's more than what I can hear and 6 00:03:01,720 --> 00:03:15,160 what I can perceive and what I know and I remember going through times in my 7 00:03:15,160 --> 00:03:34,729 life when I had this burning desire to know to understand because I feel 8 00:03:40,180 --> 00:03:46,110 there's a curtain that prevent me from seeing what's actually there 9 00:03:46,110 --> 00:03:55,150 and this feeling this desire was so strong with my mom passed away I really 10 00:03:55,150 --> 00:04:08,980 wanted to know where is she now, which direction is she going into. And I felt 11 00:04:08,980 --> 00:04:20,229 if I could just you know draw away the curtain I can't really see and yet it felt 12 00:04:20,229 --> 00:04:35,710 really impossible for me to draw that curtain so that I can actually see so then 13 00:04:35,710 --> 00:04:39,030 I can really understand 14 00:04:44,889 --> 00:04:56,150 and in my life as a practitioner I felt a lot of time that I am wearing tinted 15 00:04:56,150 --> 00:05:04,370 glasses to look at reality. I have an idea of reality, I have an idea, a 16 00:05:04,370 --> 00:05:12,380 perception of myself and of other people and I can't really you know like really 17 00:05:12,380 --> 00:05:21,020 put down that glasses so that I can see reality as it is and I can see other 18 00:05:21,020 --> 00:05:28,370 people as who they are and not just ideas and perceptions and prejudices 19 00:05:28,370 --> 00:05:41,060 that I have so a burning desire in me to really experience enlightenment. To really 20 00:05:41,060 --> 00:05:49,750 have a taste of it because I know once I'm able to experience enlightenment 21 00:05:51,039 --> 00:06:03,979 then I can see what my flesh eye cannot see, I can understand what my mind cannot 22 00:06:03,979 --> 00:06:11,599 perceive. And so I always talk about enlightenment. 23 00:06:11,599 --> 00:06:21,830 I always touch on it every time I give a talk. And one time one of the 24 00:06:21,830 --> 00:06:27,770 younger brothers came up to me after my talk about enlightenment and he said: 25 00:06:27,770 --> 00:06:35,720 "Sister you were very brave to talk about enlightenment!" and I knew that wasn't a 26 00:06:35,720 --> 00:06:37,900 compliment. 27 00:06:38,450 --> 00:06:47,970 And I asked "what do you mean?" and he said: "the brothers, well some of the 28 00:06:47,970 --> 00:06:57,090 brothers, are very allergic to the word enlightenment". And I thought what's with 29 00:06:57,090 --> 00:07:06,810 you brothers I mean maybe that's why you have a lot of difficulties maybe because 30 00:07:06,810 --> 00:07:15,570 you don't set high enough goal for your for your practice and that's when I 31 00:07:15,570 --> 00:07:22,770 realize that maybe people do have negative idea negative connotation to 32 00:07:22,770 --> 00:07:37,740 the world enlightenment and so the theme of the talks this winter is about 33 00:07:37,740 --> 00:07:45,480 enlightenment how can we experience enlightenment here and now what 34 00:07:45,480 --> 00:07:52,300 practices can we do to become enlightened 35 00:07:55,180 --> 00:08:00,580 and so instead of using the word enlightenment I learned to use the word 36 00:08:00,580 --> 00:08:08,770 awakening I think it makes more sense to me because it's like we've been sleeping 37 00:08:08,770 --> 00:08:19,650 all along for a million years with our eyes closed even when we are awake we 38 00:08:19,650 --> 00:08:28,090 live in a dream even when we are awake and then artists under our eyes opened 39 00:08:28,090 --> 00:08:37,300 and seen so it's a beautiful image for me the word of wakening really provokes 40 00:08:37,300 --> 00:08:49,210 them image of waking up to what's there. And so so let me write down the Seven 41 00:08:49,210 --> 00:09:01,530 Factors of Awakening. Last week sr Jina had already talked about mindfulness 42 00:09:10,819 --> 00:09:22,980 So the Seven Factors of Awaking, it starts with mindfulness. 43 00:09:22,980 --> 00:09:44,750 The second one is investigation of phenomenas, or dharmas. 44 00:09:50,330 --> 00:09:56,230 The third one is diligent or energy. 45 00:10:10,450 --> 00:10:41,250 The fourth is joy, the fifth is tranquility, sixth is concentration and the seventh equanimity 46 00:10:48,800 --> 00:10:58,360 so today I will talk about investigation so as you have already learned that there 47 00:10:58,360 --> 00:11:04,240 are the 3 important practices, three essential practices, we call them the 48 00:11:04,240 --> 00:11:12,160 three trainings or the three learnings. It's mindfulness concentration and 49 00:11:12,160 --> 00:11:24,760 insight. These are three precious gems in our heart. And mindfulness simply means 50 00:11:24,760 --> 00:11:30,210 to know what's happening here now. 51 00:11:31,830 --> 00:11:38,430 Mindfulness is a light inside ourselves 52 00:11:38,430 --> 00:11:51,760 that once it's lit up we can see we can see not just with our eyes but we can see 53 00:11:51,760 --> 00:12:00,040 with our mind what's happening in our body what's happening did our mind and 54 00:12:00,040 --> 00:12:08,650 also what's happening around us. And like sister Jina said if only you take up this 55 00:12:08,650 --> 00:12:17,380 practice the mindfulness practice as she has shared last week it's already 56 00:12:17,380 --> 00:12:23,770 enough for you to become enlightened. Because once you are embodied 57 00:12:23,770 --> 00:12:38,620 with mindfulness you you radiate with light and that you see you can see so 58 00:12:38,620 --> 00:12:48,880 much more and when you are mindful it means that you're there you're present 59 00:12:48,880 --> 00:12:53,400 for whatever it is that you're looking at 60 00:12:54,330 --> 00:13:01,780 and when you stay with it long enough you see see very deeply and that's 61 00:13:01,780 --> 00:13:08,020 mindfulness concentration and insight and that feeling it's coming from a very 62 00:13:08,020 --> 00:13:17,110 deep place inside it's like a gut feeling experience and once you have 63 00:13:17,110 --> 00:13:23,500 that insight you know this is it it's like aha 64 00:13:23,500 --> 00:13:31,810 is that a high experience and it helps you to understand and it liberates you 65 00:13:31,810 --> 00:13:42,780 from whatever it is that you still get stuck in or tell you have not understood 66 00:13:43,710 --> 00:13:50,050 so that's mindfulness concentration and insight in brief but when you look at 67 00:13:50,050 --> 00:13:55,260 the seven factors of awakening we don't really see insight 68 00:13:55,260 --> 00:14:01,380 there's concentration there's mindfulness but there's no insight 69 00:14:07,850 --> 00:14:19,490 and insight is very important the element that liberates it's not there 70 00:14:28,030 --> 00:14:33,990 I can see in your faces that you have the answer already 71 00:14:39,210 --> 00:14:59,770 that's because investigation of dharma's which means to look deeply, to search to be 72 00:14:59,770 --> 00:15:14,820 curious, helps us to understand. So investigation leads to insight. 73 00:15:14,820 --> 00:15:26,320 So in investigation, if we practice it then there's understanding, there's insight. 74 00:15:26,460 --> 00:15:35,920 So insight is actually there. But of course if we practice mindfulness you can also 75 00:15:35,920 --> 00:15:42,310 find insight to mindfulness. If you practice concentration you can also find 76 00:15:42,310 --> 00:15:47,410 insight in concentration. Because this three things. mindfulness concentration and 77 00:15:47,410 --> 00:15:56,310 insight, they go together. Each is giving birth to the other they are connected. 78 00:16:02,470 --> 00:16:12,300 And so how do we practice investigation? How do we practice looking deeply? 79 00:16:44,160 --> 00:16:53,220 This is a question that came up all the time in my practice for myself, but also 80 00:16:53,220 --> 00:16:58,300 questions that came up for my younger brothers and sisters about how to 81 00:16:58,300 --> 00:17:05,250 practice looking deeply. How to practice the factor of awakening 82 00:17:05,250 --> 00:17:08,250 investigation? 83 00:17:14,310 --> 00:17:27,950 Is it speculation? Is it analyzing? 84 00:17:32,110 --> 00:17:39,929 Is it thinking over and over and over about something? 85 00:17:49,540 --> 00:18:01,050 well I'll share this morning how I practice investigation because since 86 00:18:01,050 --> 00:18:08,530 understanding is so important for me that it's something that I've dwelled on 87 00:18:08,530 --> 00:18:21,820 a lot like I said the biggest suffering for me is not understand not knowing 88 00:18:27,300 --> 00:18:35,700 like seeing things through this window and not being able 89 00:18:35,710 --> 00:18:44,040 to get out of this window to see the whole picture because when I look at 90 00:18:44,050 --> 00:18:49,710 this window this reality it's 91 00:18:58,600 --> 00:19:08,860 just a tiny teeny picture of the whole picture a tiny bit like one little 92 00:19:08,860 --> 00:19:17,740 jigsaw, jigsaw piece of a jigsaw puzzle and only if I get out of this room 93 00:19:17,740 --> 00:19:28,760 outside of this window that I can see the whole picture. So let us look into 94 00:19:28,760 --> 00:19:34,550 the sutras to see what the Buddha say about Investigation how to practice 95 00:19:34,550 --> 00:19:47,900 investigation to see whether it's really speculation and analysis analyzing us as 96 00:19:47,900 --> 00:19:57,290 we learned that you know in school just speculate things using our intellect to 97 00:19:57,290 --> 00:20:01,480 analyse things using our intellect 98 00:20:08,460 --> 00:20:17,410 so let's begin with the sutra on mindful breathing we all know the 99 00:20:17,410 --> 00:20:29,049 practices of the sutra on mindful breathing and it always begins whatever 100 00:20:29,049 --> 00:20:35,460 it is that we're looking at whether we're looking at our body or a feeling 101 00:20:35,460 --> 00:20:49,210 or a mind or our perception which is really the objects of mind we always 102 00:20:49,210 --> 00:20:58,510 begin with breathing so breathing in I'm aware of my breathing my body breathing 103 00:20:58,510 --> 00:21:09,809 out I'm aware of my body we start with breathing in I'm aware of my breathing 104 00:21:09,809 --> 00:21:17,260 pretty now I'm aware of my breathing and so whether we look into the body or 105 00:21:17,260 --> 00:21:25,360 whether we are looking into our feeling or whether we look into impermanence or 106 00:21:25,360 --> 00:21:39,730 the idea of non-self we always have to dwell on the breath which means we're to 107 00:21:39,730 --> 00:21:52,460 be present which means no thinking you have to stay present for 108 00:21:52,460 --> 00:21:59,240 the breathing with our body with our breath when we look deeply into 109 00:21:59,240 --> 00:22:18,350 something and it makes so much sense because when we look deeply why are not 110 00:22:18,350 --> 00:22:26,360 using a breath while we're not mindful or present what happened is that we can 111 00:22:26,360 --> 00:22:37,639 easily get caught up in our thoughts stories we have you know head ideas you 112 00:22:37,639 --> 00:22:44,870 have about you know whatever it is that we're looking at and before we know it 113 00:22:44,870 --> 00:22:56,480 we're miles away from where we are from the present moment and so we can go in 114 00:22:56,480 --> 00:23:00,049 there with the intention good intention of wanting to look deeply into something 115 00:23:00,049 --> 00:23:05,539 and the next thing we knew, it's like we're wasting our time thinking about one 116 00:23:05,539 --> 00:23:15,649 thing to the next. Does that happen in you? It happens to all of us because 117 00:23:15,649 --> 00:23:21,220 we're not really present and so the breath helps us to stay afloat 118 00:23:21,220 --> 00:23:32,000 so that we're not submerged in the sea of thinking so that's the first thing 119 00:23:32,000 --> 00:23:39,159 that we learn for the future he said the breath is so instrumental 120 00:23:39,159 --> 00:23:45,669 and happiness to be able to look deeply into something 121 00:23:56,750 --> 00:24:04,460 so let's breathe with the sound of the Bell and just stay pressing with a 122 00:24:04,460 --> 00:24:10,850 breath we notice it coming in coming out we notice the beginning of the breath 123 00:24:10,850 --> 00:24:14,679 and the end of the breath 124 00:25:19,200 --> 00:25:26,789 so the breathing helps us to be really quiet in our mind so that was consumed 125 00:25:27,779 --> 00:25:40,269 and then there's another sutra that I really like, and I always, it's like my my 126 00:25:40,269 --> 00:25:45,609 daily practice, is the sutra, the discourse on the four foundations of 127 00:25:45,609 --> 00:25:55,739 mindfulness which helps me to see one how to practice looking deeply 128 00:26:07,080 --> 00:26:19,340 and again this discourse, this sutra, shows us how to practice 129 00:26:21,340 --> 00:26:34,200 mindfulness in our body in our feeling in our mind and in the object of mind 130 00:26:37,300 --> 00:26:51,620 and what would I really like about this sutra is that so we don't have to do 131 00:26:51,620 --> 00:27:01,270 much we don't have to do anything that we simply acknowledge what's there 132 00:27:01,270 --> 00:27:17,320 we acknowledge its presence the presence of a feeling or of a mind state such as 133 00:27:17,320 --> 00:27:30,830 anger or love and we acknowledge that it's there and if it's not there which 134 00:27:30,830 --> 00:27:39,920 is acknowledged oh it's not there anymore my mind there is no hate in my 135 00:27:39,920 --> 00:27:49,030 mind there's no love in my mind that's all there there is to it 136 00:27:49,270 --> 00:28:00,970 it's a practice of recognition which is there and in what some in other world 137 00:28:00,970 --> 00:28:10,010 which is we should be present and be aware of so what habits happening in the 138 00:28:10,010 --> 00:28:17,860 body in the mind in the feeling and in whatever it is that looked me looking at 139 00:28:17,870 --> 00:28:34,090 there's no there's no judgement to it there's no, you know, association 140 00:28:34,090 --> 00:28:42,470 associating this this mental state with stories that we have or with experiences 141 00:28:42,470 --> 00:28:57,950 we had in the past simply just real recognition of what's there so what this 142 00:28:57,950 --> 00:29:07,039 day is about looking deeply for me is that apart from being really present and 143 00:29:07,039 --> 00:29:17,740 mindful of my breath I also need to keep myself really quiet 144 00:29:24,210 --> 00:29:31,690 no thinking in Zen no mind they call it no mind it's in mine 145 00:29:31,690 --> 00:29:42,580 which means you're thinking stuff in mind and how is that possible 146 00:29:42,580 --> 00:29:49,090 you may think how is it possible that there's no thinking I mean we think all 147 00:29:49,090 --> 00:30:00,240 the time sometimes we're so drained without thinking and we can't stop it 148 00:30:00,240 --> 00:30:12,460 this ceaseless thinking that's when the practice of mindfulness becomes really 149 00:30:12,460 --> 00:30:19,780 helpful to quiet down our mind you know being aware of the breath being aware of 150 00:30:19,780 --> 00:30:24,360 the body being aware of our steps and 151 00:30:24,419 --> 00:30:34,140 that's why when we practice mindfulness we are already practicing looking deeply 152 00:30:37,410 --> 00:30:50,640 and I'm reading a book by master Linji our patriarch and you know he used this 153 00:30:50,640 --> 00:30:57,620 really radical methods to help us cut off our thinking and to come in touch 154 00:30:57,620 --> 00:31:08,280 with our own Buddha nature and I really enjoyed it because for me looking deeply 155 00:31:08,280 --> 00:31:13,760 it's about cutting off our thinking some speculation is not about internal 156 00:31:13,760 --> 00:31:21,060 intellectual speculation or analyzing it's not about sitting there and think 157 00:31:21,060 --> 00:31:29,090 and think and think even if you're just thinking about yourself or impermanence 158 00:31:29,300 --> 00:31:44,340 because the more you think the more you become confused the more we think we are 159 00:31:44,340 --> 00:31:52,050 only coming in touch with our ideas and perceptions and preconceived ideas and 160 00:31:52,050 --> 00:31:59,090 notions and we can't really experience reality as it is we can't really see 161 00:31:59,090 --> 00:32:03,380 beyond this curtain 162 00:32:10,240 --> 00:32:20,280 and so this comes to mind the practice of stopping arriving and looking deeply 163 00:32:20,280 --> 00:32:29,700 stopping and looking deeply these are two aspects of meditation we stop 164 00:32:30,330 --> 00:32:38,460 running in our head come back to the present moment 165 00:32:38,640 --> 00:32:47,440 and then receive we look deeply and the metaphor that I really like is the 166 00:32:47,440 --> 00:33:01,540 metaphor of a pond it's the image of a pond a pond on on a windy day or a rainy 167 00:33:01,540 --> 00:33:09,750 day when you look into a pond you see lots of web ripples and waves you see 168 00:33:09,750 --> 00:33:19,810 fragments of what's there you actually don't see anything but on my still and 169 00:33:19,810 --> 00:33:29,500 clear day like today he looked into a pond and the water is so still and so 170 00:33:29,500 --> 00:33:36,970 calm it reflects the blue sky it reflects the white cloud affects the 171 00:33:36,970 --> 00:33:44,940 tree in the water it's as if they're like mirror image of one another 172 00:33:44,940 --> 00:33:54,280 imagine the pond and also what's out there and and it's a metaphor for the 173 00:33:54,280 --> 00:34:00,070 mind because our mind is it's like that whenever we have a lot of thinking and 174 00:34:00,070 --> 00:34:06,220 thoughts and ideas in our head the sec out it's full of ripples and 175 00:34:06,220 --> 00:34:14,920 waves I can't see much within the dark actually when we are just filled with so 176 00:34:14,920 --> 00:34:18,600 much thoughts, ceaseless thoughts. 177 00:34:20,799 --> 00:34:29,629 But when we are able to come back to our breath come back to our body come 178 00:34:29,629 --> 00:34:39,019 back to our steps the pond of our mind becomes so still and so clear that we 179 00:34:39,019 --> 00:34:44,210 see so deeply into it we see causes and conditions why we are 180 00:34:44,210 --> 00:34:54,549 the way we are why we feel the way we do why we think the way we think and that 181 00:34:54,549 --> 00:35:03,849 scene is not coming from a pure it's coming because our mind is clear 182 00:35:18,030 --> 00:35:29,550 and master Linji said you are already a Buddha you don't need to look for the 183 00:35:29,550 --> 00:35:35,040 Buddha outside of yourself and sometimes the shouts at you if you come to him 184 00:35:35,040 --> 00:35:41,550 with a lot of ideas and thinking to help you cut up while you're thinking in you 185 00:35:41,550 --> 00:35:46,140 know come in touch with your own Buddha nature with the baby Buddha inside 186 00:35:46,140 --> 00:35:55,080 yourself so I'd like to talk about mice actually this place that we can look for 187 00:35:55,080 --> 00:36:07,490 the Buddha inside ourselves since we're talking about you know quiet in our mind 188 00:36:07,490 --> 00:36:18,869 in order to see where's that scene coming from Weston do you know where 189 00:36:18,869 --> 00:36:23,660 exactly that insight is coming from 190 00:36:31,630 --> 00:36:39,530 so we know about the store consciousness right maybe some of you may not heard a 191 00:36:39,530 --> 00:36:52,160 bit before so I'm just gonna say briefly about it this is your mind and in the 192 00:36:52,160 --> 00:36:57,320 depths of our being there our consciousness our mind there's different 193 00:36:57,320 --> 00:37:08,810 layers and our tradition we say about eight layers in our mind so the deepest 194 00:37:08,810 --> 00:37:14,500 of these eight layers is called the store consciousness 195 00:37:19,810 --> 00:37:31,210 in the store consciousness it stores all kinds of seeds and heats a real 196 00:37:31,210 --> 00:37:43,930 potentials potentials that were capable of the whole spectrum of seeds the whole 197 00:37:43,930 --> 00:37:54,820 spectrum of potentials from the most positive to the most negative in other 198 00:37:54,820 --> 00:38:02,910 word we have the seed of a Buddha inside ourselves the seed of insight in us also 199 00:38:02,910 --> 00:38:07,590 but we also have the seed of ignorance 200 00:38:08,370 --> 00:38:22,140 which is the seed of not seeing not knowing not understanding 201 00:38:28,960 --> 00:38:32,210 and then we always have a see just tomorrow 202 00:38:32,210 --> 00:38:52,880 inside ourselves Mara is there in in us too in other word everything that we're 203 00:38:52,880 --> 00:38:58,609 looking for everything we have ever experienced can be found right inside 204 00:38:58,609 --> 00:39:08,660 ourselves in the depths of our being in the store consciousness it preserves all 205 00:39:08,660 --> 00:39:19,069 kinds of seeds it maintains all the seeds in here and then there are the six 206 00:39:19,069 --> 00:39:29,960 some there the six organs sense organs there's we have the six sense organs the 207 00:39:29,960 --> 00:39:34,369 eyes the ears the nose the tongue the body and the mind 208 00:39:34,369 --> 00:39:41,859 These are the six organs, and when these six organs come in touch with its object 209 00:39:42,220 --> 00:39:50,950 which is sight sound taste touch 210 00:39:56,729 --> 00:40:10,029 smell or objects of mind these two things come together it gives rise to an 211 00:40:10,029 --> 00:40:18,039 awareness to a consciousness so there's the eye consciousness the 212 00:40:18,039 --> 00:40:26,109 ear-consciousness the nose consciousness tongue consciousness and body 213 00:40:26,109 --> 00:40:30,329 consciousness and then the mind consciousness 214 00:41:22,200 --> 00:41:29,460 and so whatever it is that we come in in touch with through our senses actually 215 00:41:29,460 --> 00:41:38,930 it's a trigger that taps into the seeds in the depths of us store consciousness 216 00:41:39,320 --> 00:41:49,200 it's a stimulus the trigger sit inside and the seed manifest as a mental 217 00:41:49,200 --> 00:41:55,410 formation as a state of mind that we can actually experience in our body in our 218 00:41:55,410 --> 00:42:10,760 mind we can actually sense it view it touch it and so 219 00:42:16,000 --> 00:42:23,150 whatever seeds that have been watered in us becomes a significant it becomes 220 00:42:23,150 --> 00:42:51,590 significant in other word it it affects the quality of our being and that but we 221 00:42:51,590 --> 00:42:58,460 think that the object is coming from outside of ourselves and it goes in and 222 00:42:58,460 --> 00:43:03,680 taps into our seeds and then you know like this mental formation manifest it's 223 00:43:03,680 --> 00:43:11,990 not like that I mean that's an image to help us to understand how store 224 00:43:11,990 --> 00:43:19,340 consciousness really works but the store consciousness it's the subject of 225 00:43:19,340 --> 00:43:26,360 knowing but it's it's at the same time the object of knowing these two things 226 00:43:26,360 --> 00:43:33,770 go together they manifest together but what we feel or what we experience in 227 00:43:33,770 --> 00:43:46,210 what we see are manifesting together so the subject and the object of cognition 228 00:43:46,210 --> 00:43:55,910 manifests at the same time it is not something we're taking they are already 229 00:43:55,910 --> 00:44:04,910 there in a form of seeds and so when they manifest the manifests as the 230 00:44:04,910 --> 00:44:08,980 subject and as the object 231 00:44:12,160 --> 00:44:15,160 and 232 00:44:22,190 --> 00:44:33,259 and this helps me it helps me to see that I don't really need to go out there 233 00:44:33,259 --> 00:44:39,259 and look at things that it investigate on things out there all I need to do is 234 00:44:39,259 --> 00:44:49,089 go back to here in order to investigate what's inside of me because what is 235 00:44:49,089 --> 00:45:03,259 manifesting in me because what's manifesting in me as actually what's 236 00:45:03,259 --> 00:45:07,880 manifesting out there is actually a projection of what's manifesting in me 237 00:45:07,880 --> 00:45:20,349 exactly and so for me the object of my investigation is here it's here and 238 00:45:20,349 --> 00:45:26,029 that's why when you come to plum village like all our practices it's encouraging 239 00:45:26,029 --> 00:45:35,180 you to come back to yourself the bells happiness to come back and mr. 240 00:45:35,180 --> 00:45:39,200 Ling Zhi keeps saying come back and recognize that the Buddha is inside you 241 00:45:39,200 --> 00:45:44,779 don't need to look for the Buddha outside of you and so it becomes really 242 00:45:44,779 --> 00:45:53,089 clear for me that the object of my investigation is myself and it makes so 243 00:45:53,089 --> 00:46:04,279 much sense because when I understand myself then I can understand other 244 00:46:04,279 --> 00:46:06,910 people 245 00:46:10,740 --> 00:46:21,880 when I understand my impermanence the impermanence of my body and mind then I 246 00:46:21,880 --> 00:46:30,400 can understand the impermanence of everything there is and what I really 247 00:46:30,400 --> 00:46:36,130 like about this is that I don't really have to you know look for I don't have 248 00:46:36,130 --> 00:46:42,030 to go out there and to practice that I have everything I need to practice 249 00:46:42,030 --> 00:46:46,410 mindfulness to practice looking deeply 250 00:46:49,650 --> 00:47:02,490 so go back because you have everything you need to help you to understand 251 00:47:02,490 --> 00:47:05,490 reality 252 00:47:14,710 --> 00:47:19,780 and 253 00:47:31,220 --> 00:47:38,390 and suffering the experience in our life suffering difficulties the challenges we 254 00:47:38,390 --> 00:47:51,050 go through they actually really really useful there was to stop and look and in 255 00:47:51,050 --> 00:47:58,660 my life has in my practice I noticed that I went through times when I am 256 00:47:58,660 --> 00:48:07,430 quite slacking I may be you know appearing you know in the sunglass 257 00:48:07,430 --> 00:48:13,940 activity but I'm actually really slacking in a silent because things are 258 00:48:13,940 --> 00:48:24,050 so easy to know I feel peaceful if you're calm and I take it for granted it 259 00:48:24,050 --> 00:48:33,140 is only the challenges the suffering that I experience that really pushes me 260 00:48:33,140 --> 00:48:40,640 to like look look a bit deeper and so actually it's it's good news to have 261 00:48:40,640 --> 00:48:47,810 suffering and when you look at it in that way suffering is narrative and it's 262 00:48:47,810 --> 00:48:53,030 actually really good they're opportunities we always see suffering 263 00:48:53,030 --> 00:48:57,800 when we experience suffering that we see yourself as being a victim and that 264 00:48:57,800 --> 00:49:03,579 really weakens us but when we see that suffering and difficulties are 265 00:49:03,579 --> 00:49:13,040 opportunities to have a scope a bit deeper in ourselves to understand then 266 00:49:13,040 --> 00:49:20,690 they're like really really valuable opportunities that's why suffering is 267 00:49:20,690 --> 00:49:27,319 it's a no achieve right it's noble because it helps us to come in touch 268 00:49:27,319 --> 00:49:31,810 with reality with who we really are 269 00:49:32,619 --> 00:49:37,010 and we're more than just these difficulties with the Buddha we're not 270 00:49:37,010 --> 00:49:41,780 just Mara we're the Buddha too and so these 271 00:49:41,780 --> 00:49:45,830 opportunities the suffering helps us to come in touch with the Buddha inside 272 00:49:45,830 --> 00:49:50,920 ourselves and bring in her a life 273 00:49:59,819 --> 00:50:04,869 and I'll share with you about how I prepared the Dharma talk because I 274 00:50:04,869 --> 00:50:10,210 always a problem preparing for Dhamma talk I really don't know how to prepare 275 00:50:10,210 --> 00:50:15,250 a Dharma talk I noticed my sister's coming up with like a lot of paper and 276 00:50:15,250 --> 00:50:19,420 stuff like that and I'm like wow that's great 277 00:50:19,420 --> 00:50:27,670 I wish I could do that and I try to think nothing comes to mind that's my 278 00:50:27,670 --> 00:50:34,240 problem and so what I did this time was that I know this is a really important 279 00:50:34,240 --> 00:50:42,720 topic but you know because you know it's it's enlightenment 280 00:50:44,860 --> 00:50:52,790 and so I asked my older sister can you please pretty please give me 281 00:50:52,790 --> 00:51:00,230 some questions what is it that you want me to talk about what do you want in you 282 00:51:00,230 --> 00:51:03,770 what do you want to know about the investigation 283 00:51:03,770 --> 00:51:08,619 give me some questions and then I also told my mentee to give me some questions 284 00:51:08,619 --> 00:51:15,490 and I told them a week before and so they gave me all these questions and 285 00:51:15,490 --> 00:51:22,580 when I dealt with this question with them I didn't trust this question in my 286 00:51:22,580 --> 00:51:29,900 store consciousness I said okay take over I'm not gonna think because I 287 00:51:29,900 --> 00:51:41,380 cannot think and so that's I did and then I kept really quiet to know in my 288 00:51:41,380 --> 00:51:50,450 daily activity I do my best to be mindful and to be really conscious of 289 00:51:50,450 --> 00:52:02,390 what's unfolding inside and then but you know like this idea comes up even when I 290 00:52:02,390 --> 00:52:11,180 least expected like what I should say and how I said what not how I should say 291 00:52:11,180 --> 00:52:18,350 it because I never know how I should say it whatever comes comes it's coming in 292 00:52:18,350 --> 00:52:28,900 touch with everyone that trigger whatever it is that it come out and 293 00:52:34,110 --> 00:52:40,270 and I and this is what I do in my daily life is that I have to trust my store 294 00:52:40,270 --> 00:52:49,300 consciousness and when we are keeping our self really quiet really mindful to 295 00:52:49,300 --> 00:53:02,220 reflect on what's there this is exactly what we're doing we're and Trust in the 296 00:53:02,220 --> 00:53:09,870 store consciousness with these issues for it to work for us and it's actually 297 00:53:09,870 --> 00:53:15,460 less costly because that's the nature of store consciousness is that it works 298 00:53:15,460 --> 00:53:20,740 night and day even when we are asleep maybe when I am asleep you know like 299 00:53:20,740 --> 00:53:25,720 these questions it's working in the depths of my store consciousness to 300 00:53:25,720 --> 00:53:29,310 prepare the Dharma talk for me 301 00:53:43,520 --> 00:53:48,010 it's very costly when we have to think 302 00:53:49,840 --> 00:54:00,650 because our brain with only 2% of the whole total total body mass and it 303 00:54:00,650 --> 00:54:10,460 consumes 25% of the energy of our whole body but if we are like having this 304 00:54:10,460 --> 00:54:22,340 episode of like ceaseless thinking that will stop even when we are completely 305 00:54:22,340 --> 00:54:26,630 exhausted even when we have like a terrible headache and we couldn't stop 306 00:54:26,630 --> 00:54:37,160 thinking anybody if experienced that before a few of you well that happened 307 00:54:37,160 --> 00:54:47,840 to me so I know I've been there and so it drains you and yet you're still in 308 00:54:47,840 --> 00:54:57,650 the dark because the more you think the more in the dark you are but if you 309 00:54:57,650 --> 00:55:05,210 entrust these issues to your store consciousness like I have interested 310 00:55:05,210 --> 00:55:14,960 these questions in their store consciousness store consciousness what 311 00:55:14,960 --> 00:55:23,740 would we do its work and they will provide us with the answer 312 00:55:26,740 --> 00:55:38,809 and that answer is inside so inside this now coming from our head inside is 313 00:55:38,809 --> 00:55:51,920 coming for the depths of our being so trusting in my store consciousness helps 314 00:55:51,920 --> 00:55:58,059 me not to be so tired and also dreamed 315 00:55:58,119 --> 00:56:04,240 so the practice is not about getting more the practice is about cleaner in 316 00:56:04,240 --> 00:56:11,599 clearing away because we already have woven whatever it is that we're looking 317 00:56:11,599 --> 00:56:14,960 for we already have inside inside ourselves 318 00:56:14,960 --> 00:56:22,660 it's about clearing away these ideas and thoughts and perceptions and thinking 319 00:56:22,660 --> 00:56:34,599 that means that this but the space is in room this inside - and for 320 00:56:43,790 --> 00:57:02,070 so one in the inevitable question that came from my sisters is how do they give 321 00:57:02,070 --> 00:57:19,520 an example or how do I practice looking deeply to walk through my suffering 322 00:57:43,410 --> 00:57:51,119 you know I've been up here many times before in the last day was in more than 323 00:57:51,119 --> 00:57:59,430 two years you know that before that time is always appear and we have the 324 00:57:59,430 --> 00:58:05,990 pleasure to sit in down there and listen you know being up here it's kind of I 325 00:58:05,990 --> 00:58:16,500 feel like it's I feel transparent up here because it's beyond me what 326 00:58:16,500 --> 00:58:28,049 actually comes out and sometimes my sister said it's a good talk or sometime 327 00:58:28,049 --> 00:58:30,750 it's not a very good talk and I said I'm sorry 328 00:58:30,750 --> 00:58:37,019 whatever comes out you just have to accept because I can't do anything about 329 00:58:37,019 --> 00:58:48,660 it it's my store consciousness I blame it on my store consciousness and but 330 00:58:48,660 --> 00:58:57,259 this time I have to admit I'm a bit nervous to come up here 331 00:59:04,849 --> 00:59:21,170 how to breathe with that feeling and I heard this voice underneath that feeling 332 00:59:21,170 --> 00:59:36,200 of nervousness the voice that I'm not good enough it's a voice familiar I'm 333 00:59:36,200 --> 00:59:53,259 not good enough and this voice it's really a very oh oh friend of mine 334 00:59:58,730 --> 01:00:08,630 a voice that was there when I was a child and especially when I was a 335 01:00:08,630 --> 01:00:17,840 teenager and I had to work a lot with that voice that I'm not good enough I'm 336 01:00:17,840 --> 01:00:22,940 not good enough every day - no I'm not intelligent 337 01:00:22,940 --> 01:00:28,700 enough I'm not beautiful enough I'm not enough of this and I'm not enough of 338 01:00:28,700 --> 01:00:35,600 that and I had to work a lot with with that 339 01:00:35,600 --> 01:00:47,260 when I begun when I began my my my life my practice and what I realized was then 340 01:00:47,260 --> 01:00:58,880 that voice was actually connected to I don't know if it's connected but it has 341 01:00:58,880 --> 01:01:09,109 to do with my dad I never talked about my dad in the community I talked a lot 342 01:01:09,109 --> 01:01:13,210 about my mom but never about my dad 343 01:01:26,100 --> 01:01:34,020 that's because I don't know what it's like to have a dad that's because my dad 344 01:01:34,020 --> 01:01:45,600 passed away we know it's one and a half years old and I grew up filthy feeling 345 01:01:45,600 --> 01:01:55,700 there's something wrong with me that I'm not complete but I'm not good enough 346 01:01:55,700 --> 01:02:12,210 not good enough and that as a teenager as a child I felt like there's a hole 347 01:02:12,210 --> 01:02:22,020 inside here even though my mom was a very loving caring she was never 348 01:02:22,020 --> 01:02:27,540 remarried so that she cannot she can really put all her energy and her love 349 01:02:27,540 --> 01:02:40,280 for for us and now it's the internal process that was happening inside 350 01:02:47,210 --> 01:02:57,810 excessive there's a missing piece of the jigsaw puzzle inside me and it created a 351 01:02:57,810 --> 01:03:05,460 lot of suffering for me and in my my practice whenever I experienced 352 01:03:05,460 --> 01:03:13,430 suffering it's always coming back to that suffering as a child as a teenager 353 01:03:13,430 --> 01:03:24,800 and that voice have always been there and I have to walk along with it 354 01:03:29,760 --> 01:03:39,630 and so and so when I knew this is where it was coming from I had promised to 355 01:03:39,630 --> 01:03:52,650 accept myself as sure I was and I practiced to see my father in myself to 356 01:03:52,650 --> 01:04:06,690 see my dad in myself and I started to notice things in my siblings that are 357 01:04:06,690 --> 01:04:14,850 also email he may not be very strong in my mom I know that's my dad so with the 358 01:04:14,850 --> 01:04:23,960 practice I was able to fill up that hole in the practice of understanding myself 359 01:04:23,960 --> 01:04:35,250 the practice of accepting and loving myself as Who I am but then once in a 360 01:04:35,250 --> 01:04:45,780 blue it comes up again you know his voice it comes up again but the practice 361 01:04:45,780 --> 01:04:52,830 of looking deeply had helped me now to recognize it immediately once it comes 362 01:04:52,830 --> 01:05:03,859 up so that it doesn't have the charge and the power to overwhelm me as it had 363 01:05:03,859 --> 01:05:07,910 you know as a teenager 364 01:05:17,700 --> 01:05:27,780 and so whatever it is that we have to work with whatever voice it is that's 365 01:05:27,780 --> 01:05:42,000 keep telling us about ourselves it's actually a wrong perception of myself if 366 01:05:42,000 --> 01:05:51,690 we look deeper into ourselves we see that we're more than just this voice and 367 01:05:51,690 --> 01:05:57,780 that actually helped to fill up that hole in our soul it makes us feel 368 01:05:57,780 --> 01:06:05,190 complete so whatever it is that you're experiencing to be the object of your 369 01:06:05,190 --> 01:06:10,069 investigation and that's why we need to start 370 01:06:16,420 --> 01:06:27,130 and so investigation really as a factor self listening to ourselves listening to 371 01:06:27,130 --> 01:06:38,940 this voice inside and I realized that we don't do this very often when we are 372 01:06:38,940 --> 01:06:48,490 when we have like a quiet time quite place with ourselves we see that there's 373 01:06:48,490 --> 01:06:58,269 so much thoughts thinking and ideas but if we can just listen to those thoughts 374 01:06:58,269 --> 01:07:03,519 and ideas you know like it's very soft voice inside it's like there's just like 375 01:07:03,519 --> 01:07:11,980 a chattering box in the back of our head you can actually understand ourselves a 376 01:07:11,980 --> 01:07:23,140 lot and a lot and a lot and it could be really healing to be able to understand 377 01:07:23,140 --> 01:07:30,880 to be able to listen to love ways it helps us to understand ourselves and why 378 01:07:30,880 --> 01:07:36,299 we are the way we are why is the further way we do what we when we get triggered 379 01:07:36,299 --> 01:07:48,329 the way we do so awakening or enlightenment it's not something 380 01:07:48,329 --> 01:07:58,269 something beyond us and they're not just ideas either you know whatever ideas 381 01:07:58,269 --> 01:08:04,470 that that brother had about enlightenment it's not about that either 382 01:08:04,500 --> 01:08:14,920 it's about our daily experience of living mindfully and of being still 383 01:08:14,920 --> 01:08:24,389 enough inside ourselves that we could see deeply into ourselves 384 01:08:24,389 --> 01:08:33,779 and we're coming a bit closer to the reality of who really are that we 385 01:08:33,779 --> 01:08:43,279 can come a bit closer to the reality of who that person really is and what it is 386 01:08:43,279 --> 01:08:53,339 that were looking at so enlightenment is possible and it's simple to do it simple 387 01:08:53,339 --> 01:09:05,150 to experiencing and it starts at is breath mindful breath mindful steps 388 01:09:05,240 --> 01:09:11,279 there's this you know some people say that Thai only teaches breathing in and 389 01:09:11,279 --> 01:09:18,180 breathing out but if you can really practice breathing 390 01:09:18,180 --> 01:09:26,910 in breathing out deeply you can experience enlightenment awakening right 391 01:09:26,910 --> 01:09:40,740 here right now so thank you for, thank you for embarking on this journey with 392 01:09:40,740 --> 01:09:49,560 all us here in Plum Village, a journey to wake up, to become enlightened and that 393 01:09:49,560 --> 01:10:00,260 with every step you make and every breath we take we experience enlightenment 394 01:10:00,260 --> 01:10:03,830 thank you for listening