I've said it before and 
I'm gonna say it again,

Everyone on this earth has needs.

It doesn't matter whether you 
want to have needs or not,

you have them.

A need is something that 
is required in order to live,

succeed or be happy.

And here's the thing about needs:

you can't unneed them.

You can't decide that something 
you need is not required.

You can't talk yourself out of it.

Your one option, when it 
comes to having a need,

is to meet it.

How to Meet an Unmet Need

But this is easier said than done.

Why is it easier said than done?

Because we so often 
have aspects of us

that are standing in a way 
of having the need met.

This is not natural.

You are born understanding 
that your need will be met

and that it will be easy.

A baby is not born panicking 
that it will not get milk,

or worrying about having 
its diaper change.

To a baby, being cuddled is 
not an impossible dream.

We learn through our trauma 
in our life experience,

that our need will not be met,

and worse than that,
that our needs are not OK.

A common pattern that we have

is we go to the places where 
our needs can't be met,

in order to get our needs met.

It's a little bit like going 
to an auto-repair shop

when you wanna shop for food.

Or it's the person who wants desperately

to have a loving connective partnership

and yet directly opts for partners

who are unavailable, 
who are avoidant in nature.

The primary need in all beings

is the need for love.

But what's standing in the way

of us being able to get this need met?

Oftentimes, it's thoughts like:

"Love is not actually ever 
going to come to me."

It's thoughts like:

"Love is dangerous."

If, in our life experience,

we experience love in a 
context of ulterior motives,

we develop a belief,

that's embedded in our bodies,

that says, that love cannot 
ever happen without a catch.

Because of these types of barriers to love,

we do not allow in the very thing 
we need and want so desperately.

From this state, so often,

we are the person who's 
starving for food,

in a grocery store, convinced 
there's nothing to eat.

The people in our 
life can see that

they are giving us the very 
thing we need and want,

but we can't take it in.

We have to become 
aware of what we need.

To do this, we have to 
be able to recognize,

the feeling of dissatisfaction,

craving, wanting, emptiness, desperation.

For this very reason,

if you're having a difficult time feeling,

you obviously won't be able to feel

when you feel those feelings.

So the first step is to watch 
my video on YouTube titled:

How to Feel

Once you watch that video,

and you start practicing how to feel,

and you start to notice those sensations

of craving, of wanting, 
of emptiness, of lack,

you look to the opposite side of that

for what it is that you're lacking,

what it is that you're craving,

what it is that you're wanting.

Some of our needs are 
quite simple to meet.

For most of us in the Western world,

we don't fly into a frenzy 
when we feel hunger.

Why? Because we know 
it's just as simple

as going to a grocery store, 
or going to our own fridge.

However, if you're raised 
in a Third World country,

where it was difficult to find food,

you can bet, that when you feel
that feeling of craving for food,

it comes with a lot of resistance.

Resistance because you don't believe

that need will actually be met.

Now, this is in the Western World,

much different, when it 
comes to emotional needs.

We live in a day and age

where most of our emotional 
needs simply are not met.

And so, when we feel 
an emotional need,

we have the same reaction

as somebody who would 
be starving for food.

We are completely convinced

that there's no way to 
get that need met.

So we start to panic,

we start to go into lack,

we start to feel as if there is no way

that we're going to be able to satisfy

those negative feelings within us.

We are not going to be able to go
in the direction of what we need.

We don't even know how.

I want you to understand that trauma,

at its fundamental level,

is the experience of 
lacking something

that we need and want.

Particularly when it applies 
to emotional needs.

So, once you have identified 
what your unmet need is,

that need you feel 
is difficult to fulfill,

I want you to ask yourself 
the following question:

"What would I have to 
give up in order to have ...?"

fill in the blank with what you need.

For example, for me 
to be able to feel love

when I'm sitting in the
room with someone,

I would have to give up my 
belief that love is dangerous.

I would have to give up 
my constant thinking,

because my mind brings 
me out of my body,

so I can't feel connection to people 
as real people in the room.

I would have to give up the story 
that I always lose what I love.

I would have to give up 
sending text messages

to that person who 
never sends any back.

Keep in mind that, anywhere 
we have an identification,

anywhere our identity is 
wrapped up in a state

of being, or behaviour, or thought

that causes one of our 
needs to not be met,

we will have to come up against

and let go of, our 
own sense of identity,

which feels like a life 
and death choice,

in order to meet that need.

For example,

let's say that you are 
the family scapegoat.

If you are a family scapegoat,

you grew up developing an identity

that you are bad and wrong.

You didn't want to be that way,

but the ego (the ID),

became attached to the concept 
of being bad and wrong.

So let's say that you want love,

love is a direct contradiction to shame,

which is feeling like something 
about you is bad and wrong.

So, when you go to get love,

instantly your very ego is going 
to fight against that love,

because it will perceive that 
love as a death of itself.

The mental understanding of 
what you have to give up

in order to get needs met 
and actions you can take,

is absolutely no comparison,

to the actual physical experience,

of being able to feel 
that need being met.

And you can actually do this.

I'm gonna teach you how.

For example,

let's say that you want connection.

Obviously, my best bet of 
getting this need met,

is to find someone who 
also wants connection.

So let's say I find that person,

I sit down across them in a room.

What I do is I focus all of my attention

on them and only them.

I feel myself open up to them 
on an energetic level.

I may open up even verbally 
by talking to them,

(If talking doesn't take 
me out of connection).

And what I do is I watch the 
resistance that I have to that.

I watch how my mind 
wants to take me away.

I watch the thoughts 
that come in like:

"This is not OK,

the only reason that this 
person is here right now,

is because of... 
some ulterior motive."

You want to watch the 
ways that your own being

resists the very thing you want.

Stay with that resistance long enough

that the resistance 
itself begins to settle,

and you start to feel yourself go 
into more of a vulnerable state.

Once you notice where in your 
body you can't feel connection,

switch your focus to where in 
your body you can feel connection.

Pay attention to your heart.

Can you feel it there?

If not, can you feel in your skin?

If not, is there a part of your 
body like even your knee,

where you can actually 
feel that connection?

From there,

you wanna bring that 
sensation of the connection,

as far and deep into your body 
and through your whole body,

as you possibly can.

Or let's say that what 
you want is abundance.

Go to a place that's super fancy,

something that symbolizes 
wealth, for you.

Sit there and try to feel like a king,

try to feel like you own it,

try to feel that sensation that 
you have so much money

that you literally can't find 
enough stuff to spend it on.

When you do this, I want you to watch

the resistance that comes 
up in your body.

What kind of thoughts 
are trying to tell you:

"That this is not the case."

"This is not what you deserve."
"This is not the reality."

Anything that is getting in the way
of you actually having access

to that feeling within your body.

Stay with that as long as you can,

until those thoughts and that 
resistance starts to settle.

And you feel yourself sort of opening 
towards that feeling of abundance.

Once you notice where in your body

you can't feel abundance,

switch your focus to where 
you can feel abundance.

So maybe you can't 
feel it in your chest,

maybe it's closed off to 
that sensation of having

lots and lots and lots of money.

But maybe in your arms,
you do actually feel

that feeling of expansion,
that feeling of abundance,

that feeling of wealth.

Put all your focus there,

and spread that through 
your entire body if you can.

I did a video a while back 
called: "Feeling Signatures".

If you haven't watched that video,
I highly suggest you watch it.

Or even if you have,
go watch it again.

Because I explained how people 
can use feeling signatures

to make themselves feel better.

But as it applies to meeting 
the unmet needs,

it is so valuable.

So for example, let's say that
what I want is belonging.

But I haven't really had a 
direct access with belonging.

And so how do I know 
what that feels like?

What I do, is I look for some 
experience I've had in the past,

that was the closest

to what I think belonging 
might have felt like.

So let's say, for me,

the closest I got to belonging

was this memory I have of
roasting marshmallows

over a campfire.

What I do is I take my 
attention and I place it

fully and totally
(like in a meditation),

on that memory,
on that experience,

on the feeling of marshmallows.

When I feel that in my body,

I spread that sensation

through every cell, 
into my bone marrow

around every single organ.

I use that sensation as a 
resource for belonging.

The reality of this universe

is that it's governed by 
the Law of Attraction.

Things of like frequency 
match and coalesce.

This is the real reason that 
people who are born wealthy

have no problem creating wealth.

They do not often have 
many thoughts or actions,

or life experiences that contradict 
the frequency of wealth.

In the absence of the contradiction

nothing is preventing them 
from manifesting that need

immediately.

When you release resistance

to the things that are preventing 
you from having what you need,

when you give up what you have to 
give up, in order to get a need met,

you can allow yourself to feel the 
opposite vibration of that lack.

When you feel the opposite 
thing, the thing you need,

and even more than that,

when you recognize that 
you are feeling it,

so it becomes real to your embodiment,

the need is being met.

Now, in a Law of 
Attraction-based universe,

when that need starts getting 
met on that very deep,

visceral, emotional and embodied level,

the Law of Attraction must respond to it.

It responds by bringing 
this need to you

in ever increasing ways.

It lines you up with the people

who can meet those needs.

It lines you up with ways

that you can meet 
your own needs.

It makes you coalesce

with the circumstances,
to bring about the goals,

that you want to achieve.

It's almost like the Universe 
lays the path out

for you to get those needs met.

And it's no longer a question,

because the "how" is done for you.

Once you start this practise

of meeting your unmet needs,

especially those that you 
feel are out of your reach,

there will no longer be 
a lack within your being.

You will be restored to
a state of wholeness.

Have a good week.

Subtitles by: Krzysztof Piotrowski
& Tanya Duarte