Mister President of the Republic
Good morning
I am now sending you letter #186
and I am very hopeful that you will read it
I am Hassan Salaheddine Zidane
The Egyptian young man that suffers from oppression, and maltreatment from everyone around
People don't like me
Sometimes they even curse at me in my face
because of my intelligence
because of my geniality
but I never respond
and I never will respond
I don't have time for that
I can't leave my project that will save a lot of money to the country, and waste my time responding to people that curse at me
What a waste of time!
Let them curse
and let them oppress
and about the project, I wanted to let you know that I am still working hard on it
I will never become desperate
and I will never sell my project and hard-work to any country in the world
and I wanted to remind you about the investment, I hope it's ready before I finish
so we can save more time for everyone
Call me as soon as possible Mister President
This is really important
and if my cell phone turns out to be dead, you have my home number
Goodbye mister President
Is this him? Already?
Yes of course! The President wakes up early
Hello?
Hello
Who's this? Mister President?
What President you fool?
You again?
Yes and again and again...
I know you very well by the way
and if you think that you can steal something that is not yours, then you're wrong
No donkey, I dont want to steal from you
Then what do you want?
I want to mock you
You're a loser
you're a looooser
I'm a loser? You're a loser. You son of...
You're an insignificant son of a ...
You worthless son of a ...
Show me now how you're going to curse
You're deleting my curse?
Yes!
good boy; you donkey
Good morning
Good morning Sir
How's the world?
The world is upside-down
Yes!
Now it'll be normal
(the car of the donkey)
Hurry-up everyone, stop molesting the engine
What brings him too?
Good morning guys
How are you doing?
great
I am letting you all know, my wedding's next month
whoever doesn't come will be executed
Hey why do you seem upset?
did I say something?
no, not at all. Why?
Well you stopped calling me and asking about me like before. Aren't we friends anymore?
No I've just been here. And you've been there.
We're not in the same place anymore
Yes but at the same airport
I'll be waiting for you, ok?
ok
Don't be late
ok
bye
bye everyone
bye
who are you waving to?
Hurry up
He's not your fiancee, to wave at
ok
Engineer Hassan
Yes Sir
Good morning Sir
Good morning Hassan
Why did you come to work on your vacation day?
I swear I forgot I was on vacation
you forgot?
Listen Hassan
I don't like your conditions these days
why Sir? Did I do something wrong at work?
I'm not going to wait for you to do something wrong
What I know is, when you come all the way here and then discover that you're on vacation, the natural thing to do is to go back home
Not to jump at work, and start yelling at your co-workers
jump?
Listen Hassan
Our job is very sensitive because it's related to people's lives
The error bar is 0%
I'm going to give you a week of vacation so you can relax
But I don't want a vacation Sir
I know that you love work
But for your work to be good, your mental state of mind must be relaxed
You may leave now
Hahaha
I want to park
You want to park?
you're coming now? and you want to park now?
Am i supposed to come 2 days before to park?
Yes
Why not?
Please let me park, right there
Can you remove that barrel?
What's wrong with you? Don't you know that it's the embassy's barrel?
It's not a diplomat's barrel
Yes it is indeed, a diplomat's barrel
It's a respected barrel
Well can you find me any other empty barrel?
Come this way, very nice job
come in, more
to the right
I didn't know to the right by myself
How am I supposed to get out now?
Not all people have the same intelligence skills.
You should've gotten out of the car, then parked
How do I get out?
Damn him
yes?
Don't you have 2 cameras on your phone?
Yes? and?
You can use the front camera as a mirror
instead of the knife
I do that very often
No way! You're so smart
It's none of your business
I was doing you a favor
I don't want any favors
you can leave, bye
Mom, I want to buy a motorcycle
No dear, you can't you're still little
wait until you grow older
Mom I want to buy a motorcycle
you can't, it's dangerous
Mom, I want to buy a motorcycle
I told you a hundred times NO
Sir
Dude you scared me
No when you saw me you got scared
You saw me getting scared so you scare me again?
sorry
What do you want?
I want to tell you that the store is closed
No way
It's closed?
I can't believe it, I don't know what I would've done without you
You're a guard
Your job is that when you see someone standing like me, you should say
"How can I help you Sir?"
"Sure Sir anytime"
one of these things
"Get out of here you animal"
What time does it open?
10 am you animal
Sorry?
10 o'clock
Oh 10 o'clock ok
bye
bye
Good evening Mom
Hi Hassan, you're back dear?
No not yet; Do you need anything before I'm back?
I'm clearly standing here
Ok Hassan, keep making fun of your Mom, go ahead
What's all these clothes? Are you running away?
I'm going to shower
Do you need the bathroom?
No I'm going to sit in the balcony for a bit
Can you close the balcony's door when you're done?
In the morning, the flies come in when you leave the door open
in the morning? I thought we're going to see each other after the shower
Stop joking Hassan
And if you want to wash something, leave it in the laundry, we're doing it tomorrow
No I don't have anything at all
Wait. What time should I wake you up tomorrow?
I'll write on a note what time I want to be woken up
Please Hassan, put that note in a visible place
Don't hide it and get mad
I already have enough problems
Ok very well i memorized all the commands
ok I will close the balcony door because we're doing laundry tomorrow
and I will put the clothes in the laundry basket so the flies don't come in
And I will write a clean note, because you already have enough problems
You're horrible, with your round cheeks
Go away Hassan
I swear I won't do anything you just said
Go away
you're here?
no there!
ok
where are you going?
Since you're there, why would i sit here and what do i do by myself?
I haven't seen you for 3 days, but you got scared this time, right?
No I didn't, you're in the usual spot
you should've hidden here
Welcome back home, Captain
Thanks dear
where are you going?
I'm going to make coffee
No no no, not for me
why not?
I just came back from the trip and I feel tired
I want to be able to sleep a little
ok
I spoke to the girl I like
Really?
Finally!
what happened?
embarassment as usual
she thought I was flirting with her
you're such an idiot
I told you to be smart
It's even better when she comes to you
Then you become a leader
I'm always a leader, but it's impossible for her to come towards me
impossible
impossible is nothing
what's her name?
I don't know
how old is she?
I don't know either
where does she work?
I don't know
yes it does seem very impossible
Use your brain son
try again
ok ok
but if you think of something tell me
I'm like your brother
I 'll see
you're going to sleep?
No I'm going to sit in the balcony and eat until I feel tired then go to sleep
ok don't forget to close the balcony's door so Mom doesn't yell at you
Shut up
I know she does
Medhat get me coffee with extra sugar please
Yes but you always order no sugar
No I decided to change
I will be a leader
and she will come to me on her feet like a dog
did you understand anything?
no
idiot idiot
sorry?
idiot
Thank you Sir and may you go to hell, along with all the other donkeys like you
What did you say Medhat?
I said may you become rich, along with the other princes like you
Are you staying? or getting the hell out?
did you day? Are you staying sweetie or the cofffee will boil?
you started understanding me Sir
you can knock yourself on any seat
here? here? knock yourself wherever you like
extra sugar Sir?
No Yes Extra Extra
because I will change
sure
Hey Jiji what did you do?
Impossible! Try to find me any information about that thief
his address or phone number
I spent 15000 pounds on the decoration from my own money
His name is Emad Hanafi Mahmoud Essamanoudi
yes Emad Hanafi Mahmoud Essamanoudi
Hello?
Who should I tell him?
Tell him Emad Hanafi Mahmoud
Sure one second
from there from there
tell me from there
Engineer Hassan
Yes?
There's a phone call for you
Who is it?
Somebody called Emad Hanafi Mahmoud
who?
Emad Hanafi Mahmoud
Hello
Emad Hanafi Mahmoud talking to me in person?
Where have you been Bobby?
I miss you so much
Why did you change you phone number without letting me know?
Tell me your new number, I'll memorize it
nice number
nice
new car?
you bought a new car?
Good
you're paying 15000 pounds?
who did you steal from this time?
You're a big thief
Congratulations
of course! we'll drive around and pretend to be american and everything you like
yeah! easy money
ok babe
bye bye Bobby
Sir
Can I have a minute?
Me?
yes
sure
you seem very familiar
have I seen you before?
Yes i always sit inside
here?
yes here
you sit here?
yes
i don't remember at all
I think my memory is probably playing tricks on me
anyways, what did you want to say?
I am the idiot that your friend just stole money from
and are going to hang out with
ok you're an idiot. What do you want from me?
you're right, can i have his cell phone number?
you want his phone number?
yes
I can't
he just got a new number
is it going to get dirty if you give it to me?
I can't, it's not a matter of getting dirty
Go away. What are you looking at?
look in front of you
Are you crazy? why are people so weird?
I'm sorry I honestly won't be able to give you Emad's number
But I can maybe ask him
of course he won't agree
What am I supposed to do then?
please, I dont have time, don't make me nervous
I'm sorry Sir
ok I have another solution
You give me your number, and I will tell him
and if, if he agrees, which is not certain, you shouldn't be hopeful, then I will call you and will give it to you
But when should I call you? I don't know. I'm always busy
No don't bother going through all that trouble, you give me your number and I will call you
ok ok
Damn it Jiji, you should've hung up instead of charging me all these minutes on the phone call
Give me your phone, I'll save it for you
because I don't like to tell anyone my number
also in case you don't know how to use a phone
here you go
What's your name?
Farida
ok I'll wait for your call
what was your name again? Tafida?
No Farida
ok ok Farida
Save my number for when I call you
Hassan
H A S S A N
yes N, you know it?
yes
ok bye