[Script Info]
Title: 
[Events]
Format: Layer, Start, End, Style, Name, MarginL, MarginR, MarginV, Effect, Text
Dialogue: 0,0:00:12.82,0:00:16.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hello TED women, what's up?! (some cheers)
Dialogue: 0,0:00:16.19,0:00:18.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Not good enough, hello TED women, what is
Dialogue: 0,0:00:18.96,0:00:21.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,up?! (loud cheering)
Dialogue: 0,0:00:21.95,0:00:25.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My name is Maysoon Zayid and I am not
Dialogue: 0,0:00:25.33,0:00:27.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,drunk, but the doctor who delivered me
Dialogue: 0,0:00:27.94,0:00:32.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,was. He cut my mom six different times in
Dialogue: 0,0:00:32.85,0:00:36.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,six different directions suffocating poor
Dialogue: 0,0:00:36.04,0:00:38.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,little me in the process. As a result, I
Dialogue: 0,0:00:38.82,0:00:42.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,have Cerebral Palsy, which means I shake
Dialogue: 0,0:00:42.23,0:00:47.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,all the time. Look. It's exhausting!
Dialogue: 0,0:00:47.49,0:00:50.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm like Shakira Shakira meets Muhammad
Dialogue: 0,0:00:50.47,0:00:52.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Ali. (laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:00:54.43,0:00:57.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,CP is not genetic. It's not a birth defect
Dialogue: 0,0:00:57.68,0:01:00.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you can't catch it. No one put a curse on
Dialogue: 0,0:01:00.64,0:01:03.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,my mother's uterus, and I didn't get it
Dialogue: 0,0:01:03.34,0:01:05.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because my parents are first cousins,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:05.68,0:01:08.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which they are. (laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:01:11.32,0:01:14.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It only happens from accidents, like what
Dialogue: 0,0:01:14.23,0:01:17.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,happened to me on my birthday. Now, I must
Dialogue: 0,0:01:17.52,0:01:22.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,warn you, I'm not inspirational. I don't
Dialogue: 0,0:01:22.15,0:01:24.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,want anyone in this room to feel bad for
Dialogue: 0,0:01:24.85,0:01:27.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,me, because at some point in your life,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:27.75,0:01:30.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you have dreamt of being disabled.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:30.67,0:01:33.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Come on a journey with me, it's Christmas
Dialogue: 0,0:01:33.49,0:01:36.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Eve, you're at the mall. You're driving
Dialogue: 0,0:01:36.67,0:01:39.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,around in circles looking for parking,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:39.13,0:01:42.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and what do you see? 16 empty
Dialogue: 0,0:01:42.54,0:01:46.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,handicap spaces. (laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:01:46.46,0:01:48.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And you're like, God, can't I just be a
Dialogue: 0,0:01:48.48,0:01:50.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,little disabled?
Dialogue: 0,0:01:55.39,0:01:58.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Also, I gotta tell you I got 99 problems
Dialogue: 0,0:01:58.66,0:02:03.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and Palsy is just 1. If there was an
Dialogue: 0,0:02:03.13,0:02:04.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,oppression Olympics, I would win the
Dialogue: 0,0:02:04.90,0:02:09.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Gold Medal. I'm Palestinian, Muslim, I'm
Dialogue: 0,0:02:09.60,0:02:12.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,female, I'm disabled, and I live in New
Dialogue: 0,0:02:12.90,0:02:16.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Jersey. (laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:02:19.58,0:02:21.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If you don't feel better about yourself,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:21.22,0:02:23.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,maybe you should.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:23.59,0:02:25.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Cliffside Park New Jersey is my hometown.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:25.97,0:02:29.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I have always loved the fact that my hood,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:29.58,0:02:32.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and my affliction share the same initials.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:32.75,0:02:34.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I also love the fact that if I wanted to
Dialogue: 0,0:02:34.99,0:02:36.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,walk from my house to New York City, I
Dialogue: 0,0:02:36.60,0:02:40.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,could. A lot of people with CP don't walk.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:40.42,0:02:43.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But my parents didn't believe in "can't."
Dialogue: 0,0:02:43.70,0:02:46.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My father's mantra was: "You can do it,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:46.71,0:02:50.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,yes you can can." (laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:02:52.05,0:02:54.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So, if my three older sisters were mopping
Dialogue: 0,0:02:54.95,0:02:57.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was mopping. If my three older sisters
Dialogue: 0,0:02:57.91,0:02:59.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,went to public school, my parents would
Dialogue: 0,0:02:59.86,0:03:02.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,sue the school system and guarentee that I
Dialogue: 0,0:03:02.55,0:03:05.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,went, too. And if we didn't all get A's,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:05.21,0:03:09.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we ALL got my mother's slipper. (laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:03:10.11,0:03:12.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My father taught me how to walk when I was
Dialogue: 0,0:03:12.20,0:03:15.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,five years old, by placing my heels on his
Dialogue: 0,0:03:15.10,0:03:18.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,feet and just walking. Another tactic that
Dialogue: 0,0:03:18.43,0:03:20.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He used is He would dangle a dollar bill
Dialogue: 0,0:03:20.97,0:03:23.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in front of me and have me chase it.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:23.55,0:03:25.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:03:25.84,0:03:28.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My inner stripper was very strong.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:28.65,0:03:31.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:03:31.72,0:03:33.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,By the first day of kindergarten I was
Dialogue: 0,0:03:33.83,0:03:35.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,walking like a champ who had been punched
Dialogue: 0,0:03:35.81,0:03:39.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,one too many times. Growing up there were
Dialogue: 0,0:03:39.36,0:03:42.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,only six Arabs in my town, and they were
Dialogue: 0,0:03:42.49,0:03:46.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,all my family. Now there are twenty Arabs
Dialogue: 0,0:03:46.07,0:03:48.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in town and they are still all my family.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:48.69,0:03:49.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:03:49.61,0:03:51.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don't think anyone even noticed we
Dialogue: 0,0:03:51.39,0:03:55.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,weren't Italian. (laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:04:00.10,0:04:02.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This was before 9/11 and before
Dialogue: 0,0:04:02.17,0:04:05.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,politicians thought it was appropriate to
Dialogue: 0,0:04:05.23,0:04:09.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,use "I hate Muslims" as a campaign slogan.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:09.16,0:04:10.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The people that I grew up with had no
Dialogue: 0,0:04:10.93,0:04:13.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,problem with my faith. They did, however,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:13.19,0:04:15.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,seem very concerned that I was starved to
Dialogue: 0,0:04:15.64,0:04:18.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,death during Ramadan. I would explain to
Dialogue: 0,0:04:18.21,0:04:20.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,them that I have enough fat to live off of
Dialogue: 0,0:04:20.39,0:04:22.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for three whole months, so fasting from
Dialogue: 0,0:04:22.60,0:04:26.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,sunrise to sunset is a piece of cake.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:26.36,0:04:29.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I have tap danced on Broadway. Yeah, on
Dialogue: 0,0:04:29.82,0:04:32.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Broadway, it's crazy. (clapping)
Dialogue: 0,0:04:32.74,0:04:34.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My parents couldn't afford Physical
Dialogue: 0,0:04:34.23,0:04:37.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Therapy so they sent me to dancing school.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:37.50,0:04:38.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I learned how to dance in heels, which
Dialogue: 0,0:04:38.97,0:04:41.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,means I can walk in heels, and I am from
Dialogue: 0,0:04:41.72,0:04:43.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Jersey and we are really concerned with
Dialogue: 0,0:04:43.81,0:04:47.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,being chic, so if my friends wore heels
Dialogue: 0,0:04:47.32,0:04:50.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so did I. And when my friends went and
Dialogue: 0,0:04:50.22,0:04:52.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,spent their summer vacations on the Jersey
Dialogue: 0,0:04:52.20,0:04:55.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Shore, I did not. I spent my summers in a
Dialogue: 0,0:04:55.82,0:04:58.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,war zone, because my parents were afraid
Dialogue: 0,0:04:58.61,0:05:00.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that if we didn't go back to Palestine
Dialogue: 0,0:05:00.83,0:05:03.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,every single summer we'd grow up to be
Dialogue: 0,0:05:03.49,0:05:07.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Madonna. (laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:05:10.21,0:05:13.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Summer vacations often consisted of my
Dialogue: 0,0:05:13.35,0:05:15.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,father trying to heal me. So, I drank
Dialogue: 0,0:05:15.86,0:05:18.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,deer's milk, I had hot cups on my back,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:18.90,0:05:21.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was dunked in the dead sea, and I
Dialogue: 0,0:05:21.67,0:05:23.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,remember the water burning my eyes and
Dialogue: 0,0:05:23.82,0:05:25.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,thinking, "It's working it's working!"
Dialogue: 0,0:05:25.88,0:05:28.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:05:29.34,0:05:32.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But one miracle cure we did find was yoga.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:32.53,0:05:36.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I have to tell you, it's very boring, but
Dialogue: 0,0:05:36.39,0:05:38.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,before I did yoga, I was a stand up
Dialogue: 0,0:05:38.27,0:05:41.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,comedian who can't stand up. And now I can
Dialogue: 0,0:05:41.55,0:05:47.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,stand on my head. My parent's reinforced
Dialogue: 0,0:05:47.35,0:05:51.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,this notion that I could do anything. That
Dialogue: 0,0:05:51.50,0:05:54.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,no dream was impossible and my dream was
Dialogue: 0,0:05:54.64,0:05:56.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to be on the daytime soap opera General
Dialogue: 0,0:05:56.82,0:05:58.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hospital. (laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:05:59.01,0:06:00.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I went to college during affirmative
Dialogue: 0,0:06:00.56,0:06:03.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,action and got a sweet scholarship to ASU,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:03.70,0:06:06.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Arizona State University because I fit
Dialogue: 0,0:06:06.25,0:06:10.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,every single quota. I was like the pet
Dialogue: 0,0:06:10.97,0:06:12.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,lemur of the Theater Department.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:12.94,0:06:13.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:06:13.70,0:06:15.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Everybody loved me, I did all the
Dialogue: 0,0:06:15.72,0:06:18.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,less-than intelligent kid's homework, I
Dialogue: 0,0:06:18.26,0:06:20.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,got A's in all of my classes, A's in all
Dialogue: 0,0:06:20.35,0:06:23.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,of their classes. (laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:06:23.18,0:06:25.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Every time I did a scene from a Glass
Dialogue: 0,0:06:25.59,0:06:28.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Menagerie my professors would weep.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:28.66,0:06:32.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But I never got cast. Finally my Senior
Dialogue: 0,0:06:32.38,0:06:34.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,year, ASU decided to do a show called
Dialogue: 0,0:06:34.93,0:06:37.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,A Dance Real Slow in Jackson. It's a play
Dialogue: 0,0:06:37.74,0:06:41.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,about a girl with CP. I was a girl with CP
Dialogue: 0,0:06:41.74,0:06:44.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so I start shouting from the rooftops,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:44.62,0:06:47.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"I'm finally going to get a part! I have
Dialogue: 0,0:06:47.22,0:06:50.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Cerebral Palsy! Free at last free at last!
Dialogue: 0,0:06:50.54,0:06:53.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thank God Almighty I'm free at last!"
Dialogue: 0,0:06:53.68,0:06:57.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I didn't get the part. (laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:06:57.58,0:07:00.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Sherry Brown got the part. I went racing
Dialogue: 0,0:07:00.85,0:07:02.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to the head of the Theater Department,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:02.58,0:07:04.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,crying hysterically like someone shot my
Dialogue: 0,0:07:04.03,0:07:07.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,cat, to ask her why and she said it was
Dialogue: 0,0:07:07.24,0:07:09.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because they didn't think I could do the
Dialogue: 0,0:07:09.24,0:07:12.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,stunts. I said excuse me, if I can't do
Dialogue: 0,0:07:12.75,0:07:15.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the stunts, neither can the character!
Dialogue: 0,0:07:15.44,0:07:19.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:07:23.19,0:07:27.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This was a part that I was literally born
Dialogue: 0,0:07:27.31,0:07:30.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to play and they gave it to non-Palsy
Dialogue: 0,0:07:30.88,0:07:34.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,actress. College was imitating life.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:35.22,0:07:38.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hollywood has assorted history of casting
Dialogue: 0,0:07:38.20,0:07:40.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,able-bodied actors to play disabled on
Dialogue: 0,0:07:40.67,0:07:41.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,screen.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:41.98,0:07:45.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Upon graduating, I moved back home and my
Dialogue: 0,0:07:45.14,0:07:47.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,first acting gig was as an extra on a
Dialogue: 0,0:07:47.84,0:07:50.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,daytime soap opera. My dream was coming
Dialogue: 0,0:07:50.48,0:07:53.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,true. And I knew that I would be promoted
Dialogue: 0,0:07:53.58,0:07:55.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,from Diner Diner, to Wacky Best Friend in
Dialogue: 0,0:07:55.83,0:07:59.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,no time. But instead I remained a
Dialogue: 0,0:07:59.56,0:08:01.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,glorified piece of furniture that you
Dialogue: 0,0:08:01.11,0:08:02.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,could only recognize from the back of my
Dialogue: 0,0:08:02.95,0:08:05.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,head. And it became clear to me that
Dialogue: 0,0:08:05.77,0:08:09.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,casting directors didn't hire fluffy
Dialogue: 0,0:08:09.23,0:08:12.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,ethnic disabled actors, they only hired
Dialogue: 0,0:08:12.15,0:08:14.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,perfect people, but there were exceptions
Dialogue: 0,0:08:14.54,0:08:16.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to the rule. I grew up watching Whoopi
Dialogue: 0,0:08:16.80,0:08:20.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Goldberg, Roseanne Barr, Ellen, and all
Dialogue: 0,0:08:20.42,0:08:22.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,these women had one thing in common:
Dialogue: 0,0:08:22.67,0:08:25.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,they were comedians, so I became a comic.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:25.62,0:08:28.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughter and applause)
Dialogue: 0,0:08:31.89,0:08:35.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My first gig was driving famous comics
Dialogue: 0,0:08:35.63,0:08:38.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,from New York City to shows in New Jersey.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:38.10,0:08:39.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I'll never forget the face of the
Dialogue: 0,0:08:39.98,0:08:42.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,first comic I ever drove when He realized
Dialogue: 0,0:08:42.50,0:08:44.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He was speeding down the New Jersey
Dialogue: 0,0:08:44.96,0:08:47.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,turnpike with a chick with CP driving Him.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:47.33,0:08:48.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:08:48.45,0:08:51.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I performed in clubs all over America, and
Dialogue: 0,0:08:51.71,0:08:53.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I've also performed in Arabic in the
Dialogue: 0,0:08:53.81,0:08:57.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Middle-East, uncensored and uncovered,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:58.40,0:09:00.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Some people say I'm the first stand up
Dialogue: 0,0:09:00.66,0:09:03.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,comic in the Arab world. I never like to
Dialogue: 0,0:09:03.33,0:09:06.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,claim first, but I do know that they never
Dialogue: 0,0:09:06.50,0:09:09.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,heard that nasty little rumor that women
Dialogue: 0,0:09:09.55,0:09:12.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,aren't funny, and they find us hysterical.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:12.75,0:09:14.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:09:15.44,0:09:18.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In 2003 my brother from another mother,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:18.90,0:09:21.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and father, Dean Obeidallah and I started
Dialogue: 0,0:09:21.88,0:09:24.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the New York Arab-American Comedy Festival
Dialogue: 0,0:09:24.37,0:09:27.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,now in it's tenth year. Our goal was to
Dialogue: 0,0:09:27.65,0:09:29.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,change the negative image of
Dialogue: 0,0:09:29.71,0:09:32.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Arab-Americans in media while also
Dialogue: 0,0:09:32.30,0:09:34.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,reminding casting directors that South
Dialogue: 0,0:09:34.78,0:09:36.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Asian and Arab are not synonymous.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:36.93,0:09:38.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:09:40.35,0:09:46.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Mainstreaming Arabs was much much easier
Dialogue: 0,0:09:46.14,0:09:48.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,than conquering the challenge against the
Dialogue: 0,0:09:48.69,0:09:51.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,stigma against disability. My big break
Dialogue: 0,0:09:51.63,0:09:54.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,came in 2010. I was invited to be a guest
Dialogue: 0,0:09:54.70,0:09:56.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,on the cable news show, Countdown with
Dialogue: 0,0:09:56.72,0:10:00.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Keith Olbermann. I walked in looking like
Dialogue: 0,0:10:00.03,0:10:02.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was going to the prom, and they shuffle
Dialogue: 0,0:10:02.55,0:10:04.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,me into a studio and seat me on a
Dialogue: 0,0:10:04.96,0:10:08.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,spinning, rolling chair. (laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:10:09.22,0:10:11.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So I looked at the stage manager and I'm
Dialogue: 0,0:10:11.55,0:10:13.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like, "Excuse me, can I have another
Dialogue: 0,0:10:13.77,0:10:15.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,chair?" and she looked at me and she went
Dialogue: 0,0:10:15.92,0:10:20.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"5..4..3..2" and we were live, so I had to
Dialogue: 0,0:10:20.79,0:10:23.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,grip on to the anchors desk so that I
Dialogue: 0,0:10:23.31,0:10:25.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,wouldn't roll off the screen during the
Dialogue: 0,0:10:25.42,0:10:28.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,segment and when the interview was over,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:28.38,0:10:30.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was livid. I had finally gotten my
Dialogue: 0,0:10:30.66,0:10:33.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,chance and I blew it. And I knew I would
Dialogue: 0,0:10:33.03,0:10:35.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,never get invited back. But not only did
Dialogue: 0,0:10:35.99,0:10:38.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Mr. Olbermann invite me back, He made me
Dialogue: 0,0:10:38.23,0:10:41.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,a full-time contributor. And He taped down
Dialogue: 0,0:10:41.98,0:10:45.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,my chair. (laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:10:49.15,0:10:51.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,One fun fact I learned while on the air
Dialogue: 0,0:10:51.32,0:10:53.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with Keith Olbermann was that humans on
Dialogue: 0,0:10:53.82,0:10:58.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the internet are scumbags. People say
Dialogue: 0,0:10:58.23,0:11:00.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,children are cruel but I was never made
Dialogue: 0,0:11:00.08,0:11:03.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,fun of as a child or an adult. Suddenly my
Dialogue: 0,0:11:03.06,0:11:04.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,disability on the world wide web is fair
Dialogue: 0,0:11:04.92,0:11:08.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,game. I would look at clips online and see
Dialogue: 0,0:11:08.50,0:11:12.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,comments like, "Yo, why she tweakin'?"
Dialogue: 0,0:11:12.37,0:11:15.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Yo, is she retarded?" and my favorite,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:15.77,0:11:18.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Poor gumby mouthed terrorist. what does
Dialogue: 0,0:11:18.36,0:11:21.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,she suffer from? We should really pray for
Dialogue: 0,0:11:21.05,0:11:25.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,her." One commentor even suggested that I
Dialogue: 0,0:11:25.19,0:11:27.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,add my disabilities to my credits:
Dialogue: 0,0:11:27.58,0:11:31.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,screenwriter, comedian, palsy.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:33.24,0:11:36.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Disability is as visual as race. If a
Dialogue: 0,0:11:36.04,0:11:38.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,wheelchair user can't play Beyonce,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:38.60,0:11:41.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,then Beyonce can't play a wheelchair user.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:41.60,0:11:44.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The disabled are the.. Yeah, clap for them
Dialogue: 0,0:11:44.50,0:11:48.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,man! Come on! (applause)
Dialogue: 0,0:11:51.56,0:11:53.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,People with disabilities are the largest
Dialogue: 0,0:11:53.04,0:11:55.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,minority in the world and we are the most
Dialogue: 0,0:11:55.36,0:11:59.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,under-represented in entertainment. The
Dialogue: 0,0:11:59.36,0:12:01.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,doctor said that I wouldn't walk, but I am
Dialogue: 0,0:12:01.64,0:12:05.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,here in front of you. However, if I grew
Dialogue: 0,0:12:05.01,0:12:06.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,up with social media, I don't think I
Dialogue: 0,0:12:06.99,0:12:10.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,would be. I hope that together, we can
Dialogue: 0,0:12:10.14,0:12:13.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,create more positive images of disability
Dialogue: 0,0:12:13.24,0:12:15.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in the media and in every day life.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:15.54,0:12:17.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Perhaps if there were more positive images
Dialogue: 0,0:12:17.99,0:12:21.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it would foster less hate on the internet.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:21.52,0:12:25.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Or maybe not. Maybe it still takes a
Dialogue: 0,0:12:25.09,0:12:28.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,village to teach our children well. My
Dialogue: 0,0:12:28.68,0:12:31.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,crooked journey has taken me to some very
Dialogue: 0,0:12:31.15,0:12:34.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,spectacular places. I got to walk the red
Dialogue: 0,0:12:34.56,0:12:38.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,carpet, flanked by soap diva Susan Lucci,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:38.11,0:12:41.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the iconic Loreen Arbus. I got to act
Dialogue: 0,0:12:41.41,0:12:43.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in a movie with Adam Sandler and work with
Dialogue: 0,0:12:43.89,0:12:47.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,my idol, the amazing Dave Matthews. I
Dialogue: 0,0:12:47.32,0:12:49.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,toured the world as a headliner on Arab's
Dialogue: 0,0:12:49.59,0:12:54.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Gone Wild. I was a delegate representing
Dialogue: 0,0:12:54.34,0:12:57.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the great state of New Jersey at the 2008
Dialogue: 0,0:12:57.18,0:13:01.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,DNC. And I founded Maysoon's Kids, a
Dialogue: 0,0:13:01.18,0:13:03.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,charity that helps to give Palestinian
Dialogue: 0,0:13:03.85,0:13:06.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,refugee children a sliver of the chance my
Dialogue: 0,0:13:06.56,0:13:09.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,parents gave me. But the one moment that
Dialogue: 0,0:13:09.20,0:13:12.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,stands out the most was when I got, before
Dialogue: 0,0:13:12.08,0:13:16.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,this moment. (laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:13:20.54,0:13:23.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But the one moment that stands out the
Dialogue: 0,0:13:23.27,0:13:27.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,most was when I got to perform for the man
Dialogue: 0,0:13:27.12,0:13:29.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who flies like a butterfly and stings like
Dialogue: 0,0:13:29.10,0:13:32.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,a bee, has Parkinsons and shakes just like
Dialogue: 0,0:13:32.73,0:13:37.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,me, Muhammad Ali! (applause)
Dialogue: 0,0:13:43.75,0:13:46.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was the only time that my father ever
Dialogue: 0,0:13:46.45,0:13:49.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,saw me perform live, and I dedicate this
Dialogue: 0,0:13:49.38,0:13:55.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,talk to his memory. My name is Maysoon
Dialogue: 0,0:13:55.53,0:13:59.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Zayid and if I can can, you can can.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:59.53,0:14:03.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(cheering and applause)