1 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Interviewer] Welcome to "Inspiring People" 2 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Today, we have Chloe Cohen, who is going to tell us the inspiring story 3 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 of her struggle and how she has been dealing with Multiple Sclerosis for many years, now. 4 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Chloe, you are on. 5 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Chloe Cohen] Hi, everybody. My name is Chloe 6 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and I've been living with Multiple Sclerosis for about 14 years, now. 7 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I was 20 years old when I was diagnosed and for me it was very quick - it was not - 8 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Most people generally have symptoms and then slowly, more shit starts happening, 9 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and then they are diagnosed. 10 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But for me, I hit my head real hard, and that head trauma caused symptoms pretty much instantly. 11 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Interviewer] Oh, it's not genetic? 12 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Cohen] They don't know. They still don't know if it's genetic, environmental or anything. 13 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So they're still trying to figure out that out. 14 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But - Yeah, nobody in my family has it, but like, one of the girls that I know with MS, her sister has it, 15 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and then, this other girl, her father has it. 16 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So I don't know. I don't know if it's genetic or not. I don't think they know, but I will say this: 17 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 when I was diagnosed 14 years ago, there were 30 drugs available to slow down the progression of the disease. 18 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Now, I think I should start by explaining what MS is. 19 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And that's a neurological disease that affects the central nervous system, 20 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 with a wide, wide, wide range of symptoms, from numbness and tingling 21 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 to blindness in an eye, to the loss of the use of limbs, to chronic pain. 22 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And every single person with the illness is different, and how it affects them. 23 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And there is no two people who deal with it in exactly the same way. 24 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But before these drugs came out, there was no way to slow the progression of the illness. 25 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So that's why there is such an older generation of people with MS in wheelchairs, 26 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because they didn't have the benefits of these drugs that slow the progression, 27 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because it is constantly flowing, you never know what's going to happen today, you know, 28 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I've been now in remission for four years, and it's like a new life, 29 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because for 9 years of my life, it was this up and down thing of what's going to happen tomorrow, 30 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 what - is this symptom not going to be here tomorrow, or what's going to happen tomorrow? 31 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So I very much learned how to live [coughs] - excuse me - within the moment. 32 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 not worry about the future as much. 33 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But it's only because I went through all that, that brought me to this for me (? - 3:12) 34 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But I'm definitely a lucky one. I was very disabled initially. 35 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 When I hit my head, it basically just jarred everything loose that was loose . 36 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I probably had, you know, when I look back at my childhood before I even had MS, 37 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I can recall things that happened during that, you know, that were like, 38 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 my feet would go numb in the shower in high school. 39 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But I didn't even consider it, because they'd come back to life, you know. 40 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Only until I was diagnosed with MS did I go "Huh, maybe that was connected", you know, 41 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But, you know, I don't know - I don't know. 42 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 In my theory, I've probably had this since I was born and it probably came up all through my life. 43 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But I didn't get that diagnosis untill I initially hit my head 44 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and had this like fast bang: I can't use my left side, it was all like I had that constant tremor, 45 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I had vertigo, so it was like being wasted drunk all the time, 46 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 but you're not drunk, so you didn't get the benefit of the drunkenness [laughs], 47 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 you just got the bad stuff (4:35) 48 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [nterviewer] Did you suffer from it really bad, sometimes? (?) 49 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Cohen] Luckily, it was only about, maybe, 6 months to a year, where it was really bad. 50 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I was lucky because as soon as they discovered that it was MS, 51 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I got put on medication and really the only thing that they have, it was steroids and steroids 52 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 to calm the inflammation or whatever that's happening. 53 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So, getting on am oral dose of steroids relieved my trauma relatively 54 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and I was on - about some other drugs, there is this drug called antivir, 55 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And I don't even know what the heck it is, but it was something like working out, straightening you out (?). 56 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So, I didn't have vertigo anymore. So, I give credits to the medical establishment 57 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 for having these drugs available, but never ... quite enough. 58 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And I found ...... to be one of the only things that relieved me from these constant annoyances. 59 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 At least, it brought me to a more accepting place, I guess you could say, 60 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 where it's like "OK, if I have to deal with this 24/7, then I can, you know, 61 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 as much physically as the marihuana was doing, the cannabis was doing, 62 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 of calming my tremors and taking away my disconfort. 63 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It was also bringing psychological relief that, you know what ? I can handle this and do it. 64 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And this is my life, and I'll move - and now, not worry about the future so much. 65 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But my story really is important because, you know, within 20 minute, my life slipped . 66 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I had hit my head and I couldn't use my left side, and that was a challenge (?). 67 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 This is what I was going to college for. I was going to study music, 68 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I was going to be a Michael Bark Band (?) ..................... (6:46) 69 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 That's what I thought. But then what's, you know. Yeah, I had to reramp my life. 70 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 My life, you know, and I was very angry for a very long time, 71 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because I think anyone who've got their passion (?).... quickly (? /:07) 72 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Anybody who has had any kind of instant loss knows, appreciates every little thing a little bit more, 73 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because you know what it's like to lose it. (7:18) 74 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and i think it took me a lot of therapy and a lot of, like, 75 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 awsome conversation with people who get it, to be able to be at this point. 76 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But I did start a support group here, eight years ago, for younger people with MS, 77 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because all the support groups were for old ........... people 78 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because they never got the benefit of the medication until, maybe, 15 years into their MS game 79 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and it has done - it has taken its toll already, so there is always so much - 80 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 there is no repair of what 's been taken away. 81 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 You know - they're working on it, how to - figuring out ways to repair that myeline that's ..... 82 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 First, when you have myeline - I left this major point out - you've lesions on your brain. 83 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So those lesions then form symptoms in whatever area of the brain they're covering. 84 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Yet - but the disease is the demyelinization of your nerves, 85 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and that's what causes them to be set (?) on improperly, and things. 86 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So when you have ........... nerves (8:45) 87 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and the messages get screwed up. 88 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But what I have learned after not walking, to be where I am at now, 89 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 there is no way I could have done that without the concepts of neuroplasticity. 90 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And I think that's so important, like, our brains are so powerful and we are capable of anything, 91 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 anything if you put your mind to it, and what I have proved to myself as well as, 92 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I guess, if the medical establishment would have studied me? 93 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But there is no study of me, you know 94 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 , that what I have done is really carve new pathways in my brain. 95 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So now I'm using my left hand and it's never going to be the same, 96 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I'm never going to be able to play the cello like I did but at the same time, I can use it now. 97 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I mean, in all these 9 years, I didn't use it, and it's only through this, like, persistence I have, 98 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 of exerciszing, of pushing myself. And I think it helps bcause I was an athlete before I got MS. 99 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So I had this like, competitive "I'm hard-ass" kind of thing in me (laughs). 100 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Because I played soccer for many years, and we were really good, you know, our team was good, 101 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and so I have at - that hard-ass attitude of just like keep pushing, keep pushing. 102 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and the hard part with MS is, like, your energy is greatly depleted. 103 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And I know for me, and for a lot of people, when they are first diagnosed with the illness, 104 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 they can't do this stuff the same way they did it before, 105 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 they have to figure out how to adapt to this new world of not being able to do things yourself 106 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And we knew that as stubborn and hard-ass that I was, there was no way, 107 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and how I would ve to ask someone to change my light bulb, 108 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 but it was at a point where I had that, so the light bulb would not get changed 109 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 if I didn't ask someone to do it for me. 110 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And what I also had to realize is that generally, people like helping other people. 111 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It gives them a sense of, self-sense of worth, you know? 112 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And where I looked at it like, it's a downfall for me that I can't do myself, do it myself, 113 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 what they're getting from it is like, "We like helping people, I like it, 114 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 it makes me feel better about myself". 115 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And I know, you know, when I can help people with stuff that they don't know anything about, 116 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 whether being DJing music technology, or MS for that matter, you know, 117 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 it feels good to know that, like, I have something to give these people 118 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and so, like, for many years, I beat myself up being like, "Well, I can't do myself." 119 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But that attitude really got in the way of my growth, 120 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 you know, I think you really have to learn that. 121 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I don't even know, I think I am lucky that I was able to adapt successfully. 122 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 You know, I've reached a point now that the MS isn't ............. life (11:59) 123 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 which it was, for many, many years, ten years. 124 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And it was like that was every, everything I did, it was about MS. 125 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It was about having - First of all, graduating college: I mean I had to - 126 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I couldn't be the music major, because I couldn't even play anymore. 127 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So I changed into , speech (?) communication major (12:22) 128 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because I wanted to learn how to affect people effectively (laughs) with my words, 129 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and let them hear me, and not sign off. 130 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So, I thought it was important to learn the art of communication 131 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and how to communicate effectively, to affect people. 132 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And I think I did that really well, and I know I'm doing it really well, 133 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because my story is special and unique in the sense that it happened so quickly. 134 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But if you - if there's a will, there's a way. I mean, the fact that I couldn't walk and I went skiing 135 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and now I'm riding and I ...................... what the hell! (13:06) 136 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Excuse me, but like, it's .............. it's just mind-blowing to me (13:12) 137 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Everyday, it's a min-blowing experience like, brushing my teeth in the morning. 138 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I could never do that with two hands, and now I can. 139 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And so every morning, when I brush my teeth, I'm like, "Hell yeah, I'm doing this", 140 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and that' just a little thing, but it's like, I appreciate that stuff. 141 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Tie my shoes? Couldn't tie them for a good nine years. 142 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So now, I tie my shoes and I'm proud to tie my shoes, you know, it's appreciating those little things. 143 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And I wouldn't have had that perspective, I wouldn't have known this, 144 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I wouldn't be inl......... this much (13:45) without the losses that I've had. 145 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And I really say, I thing Ram Dass said it, 146 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 that, you know, through his strokes, this brought him closer to enlightenment. 147 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Because now he had a new perspective, you know, 148 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 now he saw what it was like, you know, on the other side - whatever. 149 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And I think it's been my duty to kind of let people look through a different lens for a minute 150 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and see, you know, look at themselves. 151 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 In that regard, I think most people don't ever think about things like that happening, you know. 152 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But the fact is, they do and it could happen to any of us at any moment. 153 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Yet we are so concerned about the future, or so stuck on the past that we're not living in the moment. 154 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And like, right now, I'm appreciating this moment, to be able to speak freely 155 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and let people know they've just got to appreciate what they have a little more. 156 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Because, people, you really don't know what you have until you lose it. 157 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And I think it's so important for people to appreciate what they have. 158 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And you're never going to - hopefully, you'll never have to go through that, 159 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 of learning what it's like to lose all that stuff, 160 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because it's not easy, and it was only through some intense MDR (?) theraoy (15:12), 161 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 which is eye-movement therapy, that I got peace with the fact that I can't play the cello 162 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 like, you know, a symphony cellist anymore, you know? 163 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But it - that is some intense stuff., for anybody ........... trauma (15:29), it's mainly for trauma. 164 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But I always thought that I didn't go through war, I didn't have some horrorific incident happen to me. 165 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But at the same time, I went there because I was in a car accident, 166 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and the car accident was because of this darned tauma (laughs) 167 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and I thought for a brief second I could use my other hand to grab something, 168 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 but in that brief second, my arm jerked and whoof, there went the car and we slipped (15:58) 169 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I lost my two dogs in the car accident. It was very traumatic. 170 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But, so I was going to go, and I was like; "I'm never driving again." 171 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 After that happened, I was like: "No: screw the car." (16:11) 172 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So I went into this therapy, thinking I was going to work on my driving. 173 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But what I realized was how connected it was to having a mess., 174 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and the trauma that I went through with my diagnosis. 175 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Because, you know, I was only 20 years old, my brain was not yet developped. 176 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So it is pretty impactful when all you know is no longer, you know? 177 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But I'm also very thankful because I had an amazing family to help me through it all, you know, 178 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 that's a key piece. But this also why I started my group. 179 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Because I don't think that anybody needs to deal with that stuff alone (16:55) 180 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and fortunately now, there is now, what, seven drugs available, 181 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 ........ just the three (17:02) that were available before, and those three were only injectables, 182 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 there is no - I think now, only in the last ouple of years, I don't even now, 183 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I'm kind of happy to live (?) with the medication 184 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because my medication has worked for me the whole time and I^m really lucky. 185 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But I know that there's like one or two other oral medications out now, 186 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 all the rest are injectables, and that's a big deal. 187 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 That's probably one of the harder things, it was having to know I ...... poked in my butt (17:40) 188 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 every four days or whatever, and you know, for a lot of these, a lot of people, 189 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 it's so interesting how everybody is so different with these injections. 190 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I have one friend that is like, adamant, like "I'm never letting people do this to me. 191 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 This is I have to live this for myself, it's my medication,. 192 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And then there is someone like me that's like, I can't even look at the needle, 193 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 so I need someone else to do this for me. 194 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And, you know, 14 years later, I still have someone else do it for me because I - 195 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 ....... you want to make it easier for yourself? (18:18) 196 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 If I mean I have to do injections in my butt, into muscular leg, I'm talking big needles, 197 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I don't want to see the needle, I don't even want to know. 198 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But even to this day, I don't do it myself, I have a nurse do it. 199 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I'm really good at it at this point, I mean, so much practice, 200 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and I think I have enough needles now that we are about equal on the coverage. 201 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But I thik, you know, you know, I'm going to promote myself and I'm a DJ. 202 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And I - 203 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [JOurnalist] (Incomprehensible) 204 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Cohen] I did transform that classical skill of music into my turntablism. 205 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's vastly different. It's a different sound. 206 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And it was a huge loss to me, to not be able to create my own sound, and even turn, you know, 207 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 being on turntables, it's someone else's music that I'm playing. 208 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But what I've learned is that nobody else can make it sound the way I'm making it sound. 209 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Because it's the art of the mixer, and it's really about hearing, and the harmony - 210 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 this tattoo right here represents harmony because - and I have one on the back of my neck, 211 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 that was initially made out of two base clefs in a - in........... (19:52) 212 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But the tatto artist was not a musician and he put the dots on the wrong side, 213 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and I was like, Oh, can we just like... SO he just made it in ..........(20:02) 214 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But it still has the same meaning to me, and that is that the music is never lost in me, 215 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 no matter if I can play that or not. 216 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I will forever hear it, I will forever feel it. 217 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And that's what I put into my turntablism, you know? 218 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I'm not a big scratcher. Oh, I must admit, the other day, I was fucking around 219 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and I scratched some of this Saudi Arabian music, and made it House: it's pretty hot. 220 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Journalist] Now.... 221 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Cohen] Well, you know, that was just like, I don't know if I can do that again, 222 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 it was kind of in the moment, but I am able to let out my creativity through the turntables now, 223 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and it took me a long time to get to this point, but it's - 224 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 now I know that the sounds I'm creating whether - and it's all other people's music, 225 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 but the way I'm manipulating their music, it's an art within itself. 226 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And I think that there's plenty of DJs these days that just use a stupid program 227 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 that does it all for them, and they just click in stuff, 228 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 but they've lost the art form of what it really is, and i think if you go back to, like 229 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 the original people who were DJs, they were - they were musician 230 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and they were creating their own sound, 231 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and unfortunately, technology has kind of moved faster, 232 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and so all these kids are trying to be DJs, and it's kind of funny to me, 233 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because they don't even know how to match a beat. 234 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But you know, to each their own, and I do not judge (laughs) Bullshit, I totally judge. 235 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I am - I would be the first to say that. It's like if you don't know how to match a beat, 236 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 why are you even trying? BUt, you know, that's a whole other show. 237 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Journalist and Cohen laugh] 238 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Cohen] BUt I think that the message I want to leave with, I guess you could say, 239 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 would be, you know, "Stay positive." That's the only way I got through all this stuff with - 240 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 by staying positive, then I kept pushing, you know, it was like, you know: 241 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 "Bring it on!" - now I made a point to bring it on, you know? 242 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 What else are you going to do with me? You know, I don't really - 243 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 you know, I can beat it, whatever it is, you know, and yes, I may have this illness 244 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 for the rest of my life, but I'm not going to let it run me, and I'm not going to let it control me, 245 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 but you know, at the same time, I say that, and there's definitely a lot of restrictions it puts on you. 246 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I mean, when you've chronic fatigue and you're sleeping 18 hours a day, you can- 247 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 it's going to be .... hard not only to be able to hold on a job, more or less like "relationships", 248 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 that's whole other ball of game. So it's like, you really have to learn how to adapt. 249 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And a lot of it is adapting to other people. 250 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Because, especially like now, even now, like, I don't look like I've an illness 251 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 or anything wrong wrong with me at all. 252 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And then, I have a drink, and I look like I'm wasted. 253 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And I've been called (?) out of bars even (23.29), a few months ago I got called (?) off at a bar, 254 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because the bartender saw me stumbling, ad^nd I was like: "But I have MS!" 255 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And it's like, I don't have it tattoed - I wear a bracelet now that says "I've MS", 256 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because I carried a card that I have MS, but this is much more like, bang! 257 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 you don't have to, like, struggle, to get it out of your wallet or whatever. 258 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But, you know, it's all the invisible symptoms that nobody sees, 259 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and that's what I will make visible is that with this illness, you can't see the pain they're in, 260 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 the struggles they're in, feeling like they have a tight belt around their waist, you know, 24/7, 261 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 or whatever - you know, for me it was shaky arms, so you know, I - there was always tricks, 262 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 there were times that I just sat (?) on my arms (24:22). 263 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Because whenever I'd bring it out, it was like flopping in the wind. 264 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So it's - you learn tricks (laughs). 265 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But I think that a lot of people - its - it's really hard for a lot of people, 266 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because they don't want to accept it, you know, and what is it? 267 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 The 5 stages - were you a ...........? (24.45) 268 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Journalist] Yeah. 269 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Cohen] OK: spit them out: denial, anger, I don't know. What are those? All those stages you go throug. 270 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 You go through that stuff with MS. It's like, OK, because like that first year, I drank so much boo- 271 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 so many beers because it was so much easier to say: "No, I'm just drunk", instead of 272 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 "I've got this illness that's making me all uncoordinated". 273 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Alcohol was awesome for making me deny the fact that this stuff was going on - to a degree, to a degree. 274 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And then I was reallyhe angry because I was on a college campus, 275 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and everybody was so young and sttupid and hadn't - 276 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 .................... angry (25:34) 277 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I was like, "Everybody is stupid" [laughs]. 278 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But then, after i got over the anger, I, you know, became accepting of it 279 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and I knew that the anger wasn't getting me anywhere, any of these - 280 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 or the sadness for that matter, you know, or any of these emotions, wasn't taking me to a place of peace with it.. 281 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And I really think that because of this........ therapy (26:05), I became at peace with it all, 282 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and it still sucks. I'm never going to say it doesn't suck, 283 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 but you know, fortunately for me, the only thing that I have to deal with is these injections. (26:15) 284 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 You know, I don't have - my tremor is calm enough now, all my symptoms are pretty regulated, 285 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I - So it's like a new lease on life, I feel. And so - 286 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Interviewer] .... of MS(26:29) 287 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Cohen] What? 288 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Interviewer] Are there different types of MS? 289 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Cohen] Yes. Thank you for asking. There are, and that's what a lot of people don't know. 290 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And the more ......... people(25:40) with MS have relapsing or remitting MS, 291 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 which is one that comes and goes as it pleases. 292 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But these drugs prevent the quicker going downs and kind of trick the brain into the - 293 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 thinking the stuff's there that isn't. 294 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But then there is the progressive and secondary progressive, which are the really debilitating kind - 295 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 ah no (?), the kinds with the people in the wheelchairs, and the people that (then) get bedridden. (27:14) 296 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And unfortunately, there is no medication for them. 297 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So for - this is my biggest concern now, 298 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because they've got all of us relapsing or remitting people pretty much under control, 299 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 but it's these people that just keep getting worse and worse and worse 300 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and, you know, that's the hardest part of MS to watch or even talk about. 301 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Because, like, when I started this support group 8 years ago, 302 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 there was a few people in there with progressive MS, 303 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and you know, they started coming to the meetings and they were OK, 304 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 they might have had a little tremor, but we all had tremors at that point. 305 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So it was like, "Yeah, I -". But we could relate to each other, 306 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and one of these guys I got really close with, and he had progressive. Oh, he still has progressive. 307 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I should not speak of him in that way. 308 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But just the quick downfall of his system, and how it just fell apart, you know, like, 309 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 so he comes to this meeting, and maybe he's got the old tremor, 310 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 the next month he comes and he's got optic neuritis in one eye, one eye is just looking out that way, 311 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 you know, and then it's like, ........ is another symptom (28:44) 312 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Then the next month later, he's not even walking, you know, he's using canes. 313 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And then the month after that, he's in a wheelchair. 314 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And now this guy is totally bedridden, to where his mom has to feed him and bathe him, 315 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and his independence has been taken, and it's really hard. 316 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Because then unlike - well how did I get so lucky? Why am I so lucky that I could get better? 317 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 If I could just have given him half of my recovery or whatever, we'd both be in better places. 318 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But it's not how it works. But for me, that's my biggest motivation, you know, 319 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 for all these people with MS who really can't do it anymore, like I'm going to keep pushing harder, 320 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and I'm going to ride that elliptical machine, because I can, damn it. 321 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And you know, for me, that was such a huge thing, because that elliptical machine and I were enemies. 322 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 We - my left and right body didn't work together, that whole piece of my brain was kind of messed up, 323 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 so an elliptical machine was the utter, the best example of the left and right brain working together 324 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 at the same - you know, that total coordination right there. And - 325 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Interviewer] Do you want to talk about what induced you to use the elliptical? 326 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Cohen] What? 327 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Interviewer] Do you want to talk about who pushed you to use the elliptical? 328 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Cohen] Oh, my trainer! God bless my trainer! 329 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Because I met him 5 years ago, 330 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Interviewer] Ah! 331 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Cohen] and I wasn't using my left arm. I could walk but I had very little coordination and balance. 332 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So I always thought I was kind of drunk, which is fun, in public. 333 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But he understood right away that this was a neurological disease and that it wasn't about my muscles, 334 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because the trainer I had before him was like a total jerk, and he was like, 335 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 "I'm going to whip you into shape" and like - he definitely put some muscle on me 336 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 but there was no - no pathways being carved [laughs]. 337 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So when I got this .... - this trainer (31:06], he got it and he was just challenging me 338 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 with motions I hadn't been doing for 9 years, with, like, using my arm and bringing it out , 339 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and acting as if I'm lifting my dog and putting him on a shelf over here, 340 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 which was a motion I didn't do, but - but from doing this, repetitively, for years, 341 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 it's like now, I'm throwing medicine balls with my left hand, you know? 342 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And it's only because he's kind of a - he's an awesome trainer, because he's like - 343 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 he's fun: we have fun, that's the best piece of it, you know, he makes games out of everything, 344 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and I being the athlete that I was, I wanted to be like, "No, I can do it (31:57) 345 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 he's like, "You're done, you're done!" I'm like "No! I got to do it one more time, 346 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 just to prove to myself I can do it". 347 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But ehm - so we got this elliptical machine and I just looked at it for months, 348 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 like it's over there, and that's there for other people. 349 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And then finally, one day, he's like "YOu won't even try and ride this?" 350 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I was like: "Errh, I don't know, you think I can?" I mean, he has been - 351 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 he got me to this point and I got on, and I was riding it, and it was the weirdest feeling in the world, 352 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because both my left and right were working simultaneously together, 353 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 which never happened for not in - you know - 14 years [laughs]. 354 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So yeah, it was pretty darned amazing. I was just like: "Holy -" I was freaking out. 355 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I'm surprised that I didn't start bawling in front of him. But I can - it was also awesome for him 356 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because he was like, "I'm doing my job and I'm good at it!" you know, 357 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And I have to give him credit because, you know, if I had been working out by myself all this time, 358 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I wouldn't have seen any of these improvements. 359 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But because I have this guy on my side that's lie pushing me and challenging me, 360 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and keeping me motivated, 361 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 that's the biggest thing, like, I've got no motivation to go to the gym, I hate the gym, 362 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 you know, I don't mind going to look at the sexy men, but there's a lot more unattractive men then sexy 363 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 men [giggles with interviewer], so screw that! 364 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But you know, it's really about me and my personal gain. 365 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I just feel very lucky and blessed, and I think everybody needs to kind of take - 366 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 take a moment and appreciate all the things they have, until you lose it. 367 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I wish I would have known, you know. If I would have known that was going to happen to me, 368 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I probably would have been playing my cello every day, multiple times a day, and doing all this stuff. 369 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But I was just a stupid kid and I didn't realize that any ...... that could ever happen (34:16) 370 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Interviewer] Nobody knows, nobody. 371 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Cohen] No, they don't, but they'd - I errh I think that I'm trying to - 372 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I'm trying to kind of change the face of MS. I'm trying to show the positive side. 373 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Not all these people in wheelchairs and all negative, becaus that really is the older generation of MS, 374 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and it's not like that anymore. I mean, the support group that's still running, 375 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I mean there's new people coming in every months, and they are all at different levels 376 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 in dealing with their illness. 377 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Some of them - there was one girl a few months ago, who hadn't even been diagnosed yet, 378 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 but she knew it, because her father had MS and she - she knew. 379 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And, you know, watching her go through that whole process of getting the diagnosis, having to adapt, 380 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 taking the injections, and being there, knowing that, 381 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 just being able to connect with other people about it, helps so greatly, 382 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 like even that - the guy with progressive MS, I think one of our most binding moments 383 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 was just standing in his kitchen and he fell, and he's like: 384 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 "Damn! Don't you hate it when the earth moves out from underneath you!" 385 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And I go "Oh my God! I love this guy!", like I'd experienced that too. 386 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But' it's very rare that you're going to meet someone who has experienced that without being drunk, 387 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 you know what I'm saying? 388 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And it's very - I know that guy and I are forever in each other's heart, 389 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because I think we were both like the first people who had the same illness you could relate, 390 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and he was like a track star and all this before the MS expected him (? - 36:11) 391 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So he also lost his passions but we also learned to adapt and you know, 392 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 whether I was going to be this "rock star chalice (?)" or not (36:25), 393 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 it's like, life has lead me in this direction and I can only do - 394 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 go forward and spread the positive stuff, and that's what I'm trying to do, 395 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and I'm trying to affect people and let them know, "No, you're not alone. 396 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and there isn't a cure for this illness. So it would be nice if there was, you know. 397 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So help us get there and help - help" 398 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's interesting because I think more and more, now, if I say I've MS, somebody will say; 399 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 "Oh, my sister has MS - my aunt has MS". Somebody knows somebody with MS. 400 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And I'm glad that's the case, because people, you know, 14 years ago, they didn't even know what it was. 401 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And it's nice to know that people actually are getting diagnosed faster, 402 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 which is awful because they can get on drugs faster and avoid giant relapses, I guess. 403 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 ............ (37:33) 404 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Interviewer] Did you have to change your diet at all? 405 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Cohen] No [laughs] That was the one thing I was adamant about not doing. 406 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I'm like, "You can take away my cello, my bike, my snowboard, 407 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 you can take away all those things, but I'm still eating cheese". 408 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Like, as long as I was healthy, and I eat well, but I never eliminated anything in my diet 409 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because, you know, when I was first diagnosed, there were many theories, like she'd just - you know - 410 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 would go to a vegan diet, she would never have any issues, it would help. 411 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Or if she took all the mercury out of her fillings, because they thought that could be related, 412 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and so it was like, all these theories 413 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 After I think being bombarded so young with all these theories of ways to prevent stuff from happening, 414 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I was like: "No", you know, like "Whatever I'm doing," like, "it's fine." like, 415 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 "I can't control this illness so I'm not going to change my diet if it's not really in the way." 416 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Like, I never adapted my eating any different things - 417 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and although at the same time, you know, a lot of people who - in the MS community - 418 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 who have, and they said it's made a huge difference. 419 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But so, alright, I think everybody is different in that regard. 420 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I'm not a person to change their eating habits, just because I like to eat 421 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and I know I don't eat really poorly, so that's good. I'm pretty healthy. 422 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But I really think that exercise has been the biggest help in my treatment, in my "healing" if you will, 423 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 you know? I think that's the only way I could get to this point. So... 424 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Interviewer] How did your family understand the difficulties that you are looking at in the future? 425 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Cohen] Wow! The worst was being - my mom was a therapist for many years 426 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and she had had a client who had MS, who was a ballerina, 427 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and then all of a sudden couldn't do ballet anymore, and so - so my mother really knew more than anybody 428 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 (laughs) about the illness and ..... (40:09) 429 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and at this point I think that - I'm trying to think - I think that her client probably had progressive MS 430 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and I did not, so that was good, but so my mother knew the horrors of what this could mean 431 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and so, for her, it was way worse than for anyone else, because she knew all the bad stuff 432 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and she was like "Right, my daughter now must deal with all this." 433 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But I think in that - in those initial (38:55)