(Game of Thrones theme music)
(strumming guitar)
♪ There are Starks and there are Lannisters ♪
♪ and Kardashians in the -- ♪
Whoa, "Targaryens." Do it again.
♪ -- and Targaryens, and of course there's some unknowns ♪
♪ Welcome to the crazy, wacky world of Game of Thrones ♪
- Nice, I like it. - Thanks man, cool.
(male narrator) In an exclusive Red Nose Day revelation,
we've discovered that the British band Cold Play
are secretly working on a musical of TV sensation, Game of Thrones.
This is the best idea we've ever had.
(guitar and vocals) ♪ Bom, bom, bom, baba babadum.♪
(Chris Martin speaks while music continues in background)
It's just been the most amazing creative outpouring.
♪ Bom, bom, bom, baba babadum ♪
- Wait, wait, how many papadums? - Babadums.
(narrator) The band had been long-time fans of the show.
and bearded drummer Will Champion actually took time off at one point
to act in the famous Red Wedding episode.
(bell dings repeatedly)
They've gathered in the Henson recording studio in Los Angeles
to work up the 16 songs required for a full Broadway stage production.
(keyboard)
- Nice! Have you got any lyrics? - Yeah.
♪ Around the world my heart had to roam ♪
Well, when I first heard about it I was a little bit skeptical,
but now I'm completely convinced:
it's a horrible idea.
♪ Closer to ho-o-ome ♪
It's the worst idea I've ever heard.
♪ A family tree ... ♪ (music continues under female voiceover)
One word that springs to mind when I'm thinking about this project
is "Titanic." But not in terms of the successful movie --
in terms of the unsuccessful boat.
♪ Closer to home ♪ (band plays)
(piano music, narrator) Finally, after months of writing and planning,
Chris has invited along the entire cast of Game of Thrones,
to recruit them into the live Broadway show.
Fellows, how ya doin'?
I had a moment of inspiration, it was a flash of genius --
get the whole cast to come in.
Everyone thought it was a brilliant idea,
so that's what's happening. It's a big day, big day for us.
(narrator) All the actors are gathering
to hear the songs performed for the first time.
Well, not all of them.
More ... two.
I was told Sean Bean was gonna be here.
He owes me a fiver.
Well, no, I don't think there's quite as many of us
as the band would have hoped, but ...
still a very exciting day!
This is called "Rastafarian Targaryen."
(reggae music) ♪ Yi-yi-yi-yi ♪
♪ I'm a Rastafarian Targaryen ♪
♪ I got some dragons and they're pretty scary-in' ♪
(interviewer) So Chris, how do you think it's going?
Stunning. Stunning. People are literally stunned.
(interviewer) And what if some of them can't sing?
Well, the funny thing is, they can sing.
♪ Bom, bom, bom baba babadum ♪
(piano, Chris Martin) Okay, three, four ...
(overlapping voices) ... Red Wedding ... lots of stabbing and a bit of beheading ...
Nonono. Two, three, four ...
(piano) ♪ Bom, bom, bom, baba babadum ♪
(Chris Martin) Robert! Robert! Snappy! Come on.
No, no, sorry, sorry.
(Iwan Rheon) I'm sure he'll come back.
Well, with these things it's always step by step.
Um, 50 percent of the cast seem really into it, so, um ...
I think we're onto something really special.
(piano)
(narrator) It's been a slightly disappointing day.
But then ...
Hey Chris.
I'm sorry I'm late.
Oh my god. Jon Snow.
I knew you'd come.
I'd never let you down, man.
Thank you, Jon Snow.
It's Kit.
(whispers) Thank you, Kit Snow.
Right. What we got, man?
(music) More volume, please, more volume.
(narrator) It's day two of the workshop,
(music in background) and suddenly things take a turn for the better.
With a phone call from Jon Snow, and the offer of free food,
a huge chunk of the cast have arrived.
- Hey man! Good to see you, man! - Hi, how ya doin'? You too.
- Love your shirt, man. - You look great.
(music, clapping)
(narrator) It's been a very emotional morning.
I'll have the nuggets, please.
- Yep, there's one left. - Oh, lovely!
Ahh ... I sense this choice will not end well for you.
I would suggest the drumsticks.
Oh. Oh, well, drumsticks it is, then, apparently.
Cheers.
I'll have the nuggets, please. Thank you.
(band plays "Wild Thing")
♪ Wildling ♪
♪ You make my heart sing ♪
♪ You pull your bowstring ♪
♪ and shoot me ♪
♪ Wildling ♪
♪ Wildling, I think I love you ♪
♪ but I wanna know for sure ♪
♪ I wanna take you into that cave and kiss you, baby, down there ♪
♪ and I've never done it before ♪
♪ Yeah! ♪
♪ Wildling ♪
♪ Woo! ♪
♪ Wildling ♪
(cheering, applause)
Really, really, really, really good.
Just, um, one tiny thing:
on the "lings," just be careful, you're going a little bit flat, so ...
No he wasn't.
You know nothing, Chris Martin.
♪ If there's one thing Theon might have taught you ♪
♪ (one thing I taught you) ♪
♪ is once I've caught you ♪
♪ (once he's caught ya) ♪
♪ there will be torture ♪
♪ (there will be torture) ♪
(narrator) Old wounds are healed
as new songs are revealed.
♪ I'm a real bastard ♪
♪ (he's a bit of a bastard) ♪
♪ a little more mean ♪
(singing together, out of tune) ♪ a little more mean ... ♪
♪ than anyone you've ever seen ♪
♪ (ever seen, anyone you've ever seen) ♪
OK, so, Red Wedding. We're all passionate about this one, as you know.
(piano) It starts very serious.
♪ You don't mess around with Walder Frey ♪
♪ (You don't mess around with Walder Frey) ♪
♪ don't mess around with Walder Frey ♪
(narrator) Every style in the musical canon
is captured in one day of blazing glory.
(song ends) Beautiful. Nice,
♪ If you're here for the wedding of Robbie Stark ♪
♪ keep the car running, there's no need to park ♪|
♪ He's not going to make it through the ni-i-ight ♪
♪ Keep that wedding cake in the fridge ♪
♪ He didn't pay me back for using the bridge ♪
♪ I'm afraid this wedding won't be whi-i-ite ♪
♪ Bom, bom, bom, baba babadum ♪
♪ Red Wedding, Red Wedding ♪
♪ lots of stabbing and a bit of beheading ♪
♪ The Rains of Castamere are here to stay ♪
♪ Red Wedding, Dead Wedding ♪
♪ a head-shredding, bloodshed wedding ♪
♪ There will be no wedding bedding ♪
♪ today ... you don't mess around with Walder Frey ♪
Bang -- curtains -- Tony award. Great.
(cheering)
(narrator) News of the success of the workshop
spreads like wildfire. Suddenly, everyone is in.
D'you know what, I've never been prouder to be in anything.
I always knew it was gonna be a triumph.
George R. R. Martin meets Chris Martin -- what could go wrong?
(reggae music)
♪ Game 'a what now? ♪ ♪ Aye! Ay! Ay! ♪
♪ Call me Daenerys Targaryen when you wanna reach me ♪
♪ and if you feel the love then you can call me Khaleesi ♪
♪ Got so many names, I'm Queen of the Andals ♪
♪ Queen of the Meereen, yeah, you can kiss me sandals ♪
♪ a branch of our own ... ♪
The funny -- I mean, it's, I know it's like a musical,
but I can also hear it like, I can hear it
in the radio, I can hear it everywhere.
- It's like, it's a hit! - It's a big song. It's a big song.
(narrator, over piano) Raw emotion pours out from
every corner of the globe.
♪ Are you thinking 'bout Joffrey? ♪
♪ Such a spirited lad ♪
♪ I was his uncle ♪
♪ I was also his dad ♪
(narrator) It's the first romantic ballad
about incest in Cold Play's career.
♪ ... heart had to roam ♪
♪ Now I'm looking for something ♪
♪ a little closer to home ♪
♪ Closer to ho-o-ome, closer to ho-o-ome ♪
♪ A family tree, with a branch of our own ♪
(narrator with band in background) The greatest rock opera of all time
is coming together.
♪ Still goin' strong ♪ ♪ (He's still goin' strong) ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah ♪ ♪ (He's still goin' strong) ♪
♪ Remember Ned Stark, he was a lot of fun ♪ ♪ (so fun) ♪
♪ but he didn't make it past Season One ♪ ♪ (oh oh) ♪
♪ Some people's parts just ain't very long ♪
♪ but not me ... ♪ ♪ (not me, not me) ♪
♪ I'm still goin' strong ♪ ♪ (He's still goin' strong) ♪
I can't believe it. It's a dream come true.
Everything's coming together, everyone's on board,
we just need George R. R. Martin's permission,
and then we're off. He's gonna go absolutely crazy.
(narrator) And Chris was right.
George R. R. Martin did go absolutely crazy.
(crash)
It's a setback, but, uh ...
little bit o' this, little bit o' that,
change some words around ... I've got plenty of other brilliant ideas.
♪ Bom, bom, bom, baba babadum ♪
Uh. That's not bad, actually.
Well, I'd better get my skates on, then!
(Game of Thrones theme music)
Thank you so much for tuning in.
If you enjoyed that at all,
and you feel like making a donation
at rednoseday.org, and you're in the U.S.,
that would be ever so wonderful.
Good day!