0:00:01.410,0:00:06.960
(Anthony) Let us consult the infinite wisdom[br]of the Helix Fossil, oooh--

0:00:06.960,0:00:08.000
(Ian) SHUT UP!

0:00:09.123,0:00:12.163
Man, I can't wait to catch[br]all the new Pokemon

0:00:12.173,0:00:12.963
in this region.

0:00:13.046,0:00:14.216
Oooooh!

0:00:14.708,0:00:16.348
Sweet, a new item!

0:00:16.543,0:00:18.023
Wonder what's inside?

0:00:18.096,0:00:19.776
Hey, hey, hey! You can't do that!

0:00:20.089,0:00:23.089
First, you have to get the Cut Technique, [br]then you have to teach it

0:00:23.127,0:00:25.307
to a Pokemon, and then[br]have that Pokemon

0:00:25.307,0:00:26.477
cut the bush for you!

0:00:26.547,0:00:28.997
And THEN you can get the item.

0:00:29.266,0:00:33.266
-Or I could just push the bush aside--[br]-NO, NO, NO! You can't do that!

0:00:33.266,0:00:36.686
-WHY?! [br]-Because...you just can't, okay?!

0:00:36.995,0:00:37.775
FINE!

0:00:39.015,0:00:42.915
(sighs) Fricking kids don't know anything[br]about cutting their bushes.

0:00:43.915,0:00:45.965
I hear you're looking [br]for the Cut Technique!

0:00:46.055,0:00:50.775
I've got one...but you're gonna [br]have to battle me!

0:00:51.035,0:00:52.425
Why are you walking like that?

0:00:52.425,0:00:55.005
It helps my chances [br]of battling people! Duh!

0:00:55.666,0:00:59.566
Uh...well I guess I need[br]the Cut Technique, so...let's battle?

0:00:59.730,0:01:02.750
-Cool! Just walk in front of me![br]-Okay.

0:01:03.300,0:01:04.560
Just walk in front of me!

0:01:04.938,0:01:06.338
-Just walk in front of me! [br]-(Anthony groans in frustration)

0:01:06.363,0:01:07.183
Just stop!

0:01:07.633,0:01:09.343
-Just walk in front of me! [br]-STOP!

0:01:09.343,0:01:10.583
(Ian) Come on, just walk in front of me!

0:01:10.593,0:01:11.943
(Anthony) Well, can you[br]stop walking like that?

0:01:11.954,0:01:13.714
-Just walk in front of me! [br]-(Anthony) Come on!

0:01:13.714,0:01:15.204
Fricking bath salts!

0:01:15.664,0:01:17.444
Just walk in--Just walk in.

0:01:17.616,0:01:18.916
-(gasps)[br]-HAH! Gotcha, bitch!

0:01:19.403,0:01:21.983
I have a very nice scarf. [br]It keeps me warm in the winter.

0:01:22.153,0:01:23.593
Leeeet's battle!

0:01:24.676,0:01:27.096
-Wait, wait, wait. Why would you say that?[br]-Say what?

0:01:27.534,0:01:30.714
You...nothing. Let's just battle.

0:01:31.074,0:01:33.964
I like bicycles! [br]It feels good when I run over bumps!

0:01:34.189,0:01:37.809
-Leeeet's battle! [br]-God, I hate this place.

0:01:39.705,0:01:41.595
METROSEXUAL HIPSTER[br]wants to fight!

0:01:42.382,0:01:44.822
Gooooo, Belieber4Evr!

0:01:45.142,0:01:46.072
METROSEXUAL HIPSTER[br]sent out Belieber4Evr!

0:01:46.072,0:01:46.932
Justin!

0:01:47.401,0:01:48.691
Belieber4Evr?

0:01:49.020,0:01:52.590
Shut up! I got him from [inaudible] training[br]and I can't change his name!

0:01:52.660,0:01:54.600
Besides, Bieber's not even that bad.

0:01:54.946,0:01:56.936
He's even got a six pack!

0:01:57.036,0:02:01.546
Yeah, whatever. Alright, Charizard,[br]I chooooose youuuu!

0:02:02.969,0:02:04.369
(roaring)

0:02:05.949,0:02:09.029
I learned from my past mistakes [br]and I made sure that my Pokemon

0:02:09.029,0:02:12.959
has FOUR attacks! [br]You don't even stand a chance now, bitch!

0:02:15.361,0:02:16.481
Oooh, that one looks good!

0:02:17.057,0:02:20.737
Belieber4Evr, uuuuse Tail Whip!

0:02:28.322,0:02:29.552
Yeeeeaaaah.

0:02:29.752,0:02:31.852
CHARIZARD's defense fell!

0:02:31.855,0:02:35.915
Uh...Charizard, use Rock Smash!

0:02:36.576,0:02:38.746
(roaring)

0:02:40.893,0:02:41.623
Ow.

0:02:41.673,0:02:43.333
CHARIZARD used ROCK SMASH.

0:02:43.468,0:02:47.318
Alright, Belieber4Evr, annihilate [br]his face with a Swagger!

0:02:47.814,0:02:49.764
Swagger? That's a...that's a move?!

0:02:49.884,0:02:50.904
Uh, duh-duh-duh.

0:02:51.062,0:02:53.832
(rap music)

0:02:57.415,0:02:59.195
[inaudible]

0:03:02.718,0:03:04.858
CHARIZARD's attack [br]sharply rose!

0:03:04.858,0:03:06.638
CHARIZARD became [br]confused!

0:03:06.638,0:03:10.098
Crap, uh, Charizard[br]uuuuse Flame Thrower!

0:03:11.855,0:03:13.915
CHARIZARD hurt itself[br]in its confusion!

0:03:13.964,0:03:16.424
What?! Why would you punch yourself[br]in the face 'cause you're confused?

0:03:16.424,0:03:17.974
That doesn't even make sense!

0:03:18.959,0:03:21.359
Can you stop playing this damn song[br]while we're battling?!

0:03:23.799,0:03:25.819
-(keyboard talking) No. [br]-(music continues)

0:03:26.202,0:03:29.532
Okie dokie! Let's blast [br]him with a Curse Attack!

0:03:29.902,0:03:33.642
[bleep] bush [bleep] [bleep][bleep][bleep]

0:03:33.642,0:03:37.052
[bleep] [bleep] [bleep] [bleep] [bleep]

0:03:37.496,0:03:39.586
What the hell is a [bleeping] [bleep]?

0:03:39.726,0:03:41.326
Belieber4Ever's[br]attack and defense rose!

0:03:41.384,0:03:43.024
Belieber4Ever's[br]speed fell!

0:03:43.141,0:03:45.911
Alright, Charizard. [br]Use Flame Thrower again,

0:03:45.911,0:03:47.691
but this time DON'T PUNCH [br]YOURSELF LIKE AN IDIOT!

0:03:47.792,0:03:49.602
(birds tweeting)

0:03:53.317,0:03:54.887
CHARIZARD hurt itself in its confusion!

0:03:54.921,0:03:58.001
This is finally my chance [br]to beat one of his Pokemon!

0:03:58.431,0:03:59.871
Belieber4Evr...

0:04:01.121,0:04:03.411
uuuuuuuuse...

0:04:03.619,0:04:04.289
Tickle!

0:04:05.673,0:04:07.193
(giggling)

0:04:07.863,0:04:10.093
(Charizard laughs)

0:04:11.404,0:04:12.944
It's not very effective.

0:04:12.944,0:04:14.784
CHARIZARD is no longer confused.

0:04:14.884,0:04:18.554
Alright, Charizard, [br]finish him off with a...

0:04:18.904,0:04:20.214
scratch!

0:04:24.034,0:04:27.934
OWWWWW! (sobbing)

0:04:29.831,0:04:31.251
Enemy Belieber4Evr[br]has fainted!

0:04:31.321,0:04:32.251
YEAAAH!

0:04:32.251,0:04:34.281
NOOOOO!

0:04:34.281,0:04:38.111
But my Pokemon had so many attacks!

0:04:38.111,0:04:39.881
Mmm! Mmm mmm mmm!

0:04:39.881,0:04:40.801
Alright, fine!

0:04:40.801,0:04:42.571
Here's your stupid Cut Technique.

0:04:42.571,0:04:43.871
Thank you very much!

0:04:46.081,0:04:47.821
Is that really necessary?

0:04:49.574,0:04:50.874
(keyboard talking) Sorry.

0:04:55.362,0:04:58.682
Alright, now I just need to teach Cut[br]to one of my Pokemon!

0:05:00.802,0:05:02.772
No...no, no.

0:05:02.772,0:05:04.112
No, no, no!

0:05:04.142,0:05:05.082
No! No!

0:05:05.947,0:05:07.107
CANNOT LEARN CUT!

0:05:07.709,0:05:08.859
SCREW THIS!

0:05:08.979,0:05:10.459
(grunting)

0:05:14.276,0:05:15.806
(panting)

0:05:18.743,0:05:21.703
Alright, there'd better be at good item[br]in here or I'm gonna punch

0:05:21.703,0:05:23.523
this stupid old man in the face!

0:05:28.964,0:05:29.994
AAAAH!

0:05:30.860,0:05:34.800
Awww, it's okay that no one loves[br]you and you're completely useless.

0:05:34.800,0:05:35.910
-Karp! [br]-(screaming from off screen)

0:05:36.946,0:05:38.396
Cut that, bitch!

0:05:38.923,0:05:40.603
(keyboard) H-H-H-H-Head shot.

0:05:42.426,0:05:44.756
(keyboard) ALL I WANT, WANT NOW!

0:05:48.575,0:05:49.865
(keyboard) I don't, I don't have any--

0:05:49.865,0:05:51.735
I don't have any friends.

0:05:54.587,0:05:59.093
To see behind-the-scenes footage [br]and bloopers, click the video right here!

0:05:59.093,0:06:02.393
I'll shove a Pokemon so far up your butt,[br]it's gonna turn into your brain!

0:06:02.564,0:06:06.764
To see another Pokemon[br]In Real Life episode, click right here!

0:06:07.254,0:06:09.344
How did that crappy song put me to sleep?

0:06:09.434,0:06:12.104
You think just because I'm [br]old I know everything?!

0:06:12.454,0:06:15.204
If you wanna subscribe [br]to those jackasses,

0:06:15.442,0:06:18.262
you can click that yellow thingamajig.

0:06:18.579,0:06:20.519
I'm gonna go cut my bush!

0:06:21.079,0:06:23.439
EW! Not that kind of bush, you sickos!

0:06:23.639,0:06:26.110
I'm talking about my pubes.[br]What were you thinking?