WEBVTT 00:00:02.502 --> 00:00:05.502 So, the topic of "waiting": 00:00:05.598 --> 00:00:15.558 I grew up, educated in California as an Architect 00:00:15.616 --> 00:00:23.306 studied, wanted to be good and make a name for myself. 00:00:25.441 --> 00:00:30.521 ...to have a house, two car garage, the American Dream. 00:00:34.154 --> 00:00:42.284 My mother and father sacrificed a lot for their four children; my two brothers and my sister. 00:00:44.519 --> 00:00:50.249 They escaped with nothing. They had to leave everything. 00:00:50.388 --> 00:00:56.068 I remember giving away my toys, "Why am I giving away my toys?" 00:00:56.485 --> 00:01:01.555 And I remember my dad giving away his Honda (car)... 00:01:01.620 --> 00:01:05.620 and slowly giving away our furniture. 00:01:05.809 --> 00:01:12.239 We had to do it secretly so the neighborhoods don't know that we are going to escape one night, on a boat. 00:01:13.491 --> 00:01:17.491 We left everything to come here. 00:01:17.899 --> 00:01:27.409 I remember there was a lot of pressure from my mom, especially to be successful. 00:01:29.874 --> 00:01:34.684 That's a dream for all mothers and fathers. 00:01:35.518 --> 00:01:56.548 As I grew up, I saw there was a lot of effort to achieve a diploma, to become this and that, awards, certificates. 00:01:59.472 --> 00:02:05.422 You get trained to always be somebody. 00:02:05.435 --> 00:02:07.555 And then you become an Architect. 00:02:07.617 --> 00:02:19.537 You walk in, you look and see whose office is closer to whose, and whose got the better project. 00:02:19.845 --> 00:02:26.005 That's the system that I grew up in. I was stuck in that. 00:02:27.502 --> 00:02:36.552 Growing up, I had difficulties with my father. He struggled a lot coming here, losing everything. 00:02:37.338 --> 00:02:42.628 So for me, I had a lot of anger issues with my father. 00:02:46.150 --> 00:02:50.520 This is something the practice helped me with... 00:02:50.551 --> 00:02:59.231 to learn to come back and look at ourselves, to confront the suffering that I was having as a young man. 00:02:59.939 --> 00:03:05.689 It helped me become a little happier. 00:03:05.997 --> 00:03:10.347 The practice helped me look at my father and my relationship with him, 00:03:10.431 --> 00:03:12.761 to begin to understand him more 00:03:12.830 --> 00:03:16.830 and to begin to understand my own suffering. 00:03:17.794 --> 00:03:27.584 This was the benefit of sitting, silencing the mind, calming ... 00:03:28.453 --> 00:03:32.993 and having time to look deeply at my emotions, 00:03:33.033 --> 00:03:38.603 where I'm at and the goals that I'm setting for myself. 00:03:38.755 --> 00:03:44.805 This helped me to understand more of what true happiness was. 00:03:44.883 --> 00:03:50.823 Once I was able to touch the root of my suffering. 00:03:50.897 --> 00:03:59.007 I was also able to touch the things that I am passing by because of some future promise 00:03:59.260 --> 00:04:05.030 to become this, or that... always wanting more. 00:04:07.471 --> 00:04:11.471 It's a kind of suffering, always thinking that you're lacking. 00:04:12.700 --> 00:04:16.700 This is something that is underneath our culture. 00:04:18.432 --> 00:04:24.472 With the practice, I think it can help all of us to really recognize that 00:04:24.488 --> 00:04:28.488 "Wow, I'm still alive ... 00:04:29.910 --> 00:04:36.500 "My eyes, my body is in good condition. I'm healthy enough ... 00:04:38.915 --> 00:04:49.355 "My tooth ache," my teacher shared with us about the toothache. Sorry, back to hygiene - 00:04:52.225 --> 00:04:58.425 You know, this moment is a non-toothache moment. 00:04:58.474 --> 00:05:02.474 It's kind of silly, what does that mean? 00:05:02.909 --> 00:05:06.909 But all you need to do is reflect. 00:05:07.727 --> 00:05:14.977 Remember that tooth in the back. Remember when it was aching... 00:05:15.005 --> 00:05:19.005 when your gum was inflamed. 00:05:19.462 --> 00:05:24.432 Just touching that, even though it was not a great suffering, it was suffering. 00:05:25.960 --> 00:05:32.310 It reminds us like, "aah, wonderful. I don't have a toothache now." 00:05:36.500 --> 00:05:41.690 This is a practice. Just stopping to recognize the breath; 00:05:41.729 --> 00:05:47.309 recognizing a mind that is clear. 00:05:47.903 --> 00:05:54.203 It's a training to actually be present to this moment, to this present moment, 00:05:54.279 --> 00:05:58.279 to recognize that the conditions are so many ... 00:05:58.856 --> 00:06:04.466 I remember our teacher gave us homework to write down all the wonderful conditions, 00:06:04.941 --> 00:06:10.331 the happy moments in your life now. It's a wonderful exercise. 00:06:11.829 --> 00:06:15.829 Your loved ones, your brothers, your sisters. 00:06:18.857 --> 00:06:24.217 Sometimes we're there with our loved one, but we're not present. 00:06:25.918 --> 00:06:32.158 My brother made us some tea before coming here, we were hanging out at somebody's place. 00:06:33.786 --> 00:06:39.996 He brought out his tea set and made three of us tea. 00:06:41.919 --> 00:06:48.019 I recognized, "Wow, we haven't had tea for awhile" 00:06:48.840 --> 00:06:52.840 We sat there and drank tea together. 00:06:52.899 --> 00:06:58.289 And to recognize that my younger brother is so sweet. 00:06:58.423 --> 00:07:03.393 He brought his tea material, we had just woken up from a nap 00:07:03.481 --> 00:07:08.311 and the first thing he does is make us tea. 00:07:08.436 --> 00:07:12.436 I was reading a book and I closed it 00:07:12.543 --> 00:07:16.543 and we are looking at each other drinking tea. 00:07:16.973 --> 00:07:22.403 That sounds like, "What does that have to do with my happiness, with my career?" 00:07:22.476 --> 00:07:32.766 But that moment actually is the building block for the rest of your life, you're living! 00:07:33.821 --> 00:07:38.601 Sometimes we put a lot of goals and a lot of things that we want 00:07:38.657 --> 00:07:42.047 but actually when we get there, we want more. 00:07:42.077 --> 00:07:44.897 To give you an example, you have a tea cup, 00:07:44.905 --> 00:07:47.595 you drink your tea and you want to do the next thing, 00:07:47.610 --> 00:07:50.350 when you get to the next thing, you want to do ... so on. 00:07:50.442 --> 00:07:53.152 And this is the way we've been trained. 00:07:53.175 --> 00:07:55.705 This is where we're at as a culture. 00:07:58.468 --> 00:08:10.528 When I say we all will become refugees... I think in my lifetime, we will see that we will all become refugees. 00:08:10.567 --> 00:08:14.897 It's a different thing, it's not about one nation or another, 00:08:14.913 --> 00:08:19.963 but we will all need a place where we can escape all that 00:08:20.008 --> 00:08:26.938 online and wi-fi and... this stuff is everywhere now. 00:08:28.909 --> 00:08:35.659 We have no time to be with ourselves, to be present for our body, 00:08:35.934 --> 00:08:39.304 to be present with the moment. 00:08:39.457 --> 00:08:43.017 And to enjoy life as it is in the "now." 00:08:43.044 --> 00:08:49.024 To be present with our loved one and to be present with nature. 00:08:49.051 --> 00:08:58.561 This is where we're heading. Besides the climate change, there is something happening to our culture. 00:09:00.519 --> 00:09:06.529 We're traveling around the world and we're escalating faster and faster. 00:09:08.935 --> 00:09:18.555 I hope you continue to train, find a refuge within; a refugee camp within. 00:09:20.746 --> 00:09:23.386 We all will need that. 00:09:23.645 --> 00:09:30.095 When you have strong emotions, when you need a break, or feel out of touch with what you need to do 00:09:30.955 --> 00:09:32.505 ...come back. 00:09:32.853 --> 00:09:36.853 Everything you need, everything you have is there. 00:09:36.856 --> 00:09:47.076 It's only from that place that we can help change where we're at as a society, as a human on this planet. 00:09:48.854 --> 00:09:54.864 If you keep struggling and you don't have this refuge, then it will be difficult. 00:09:56.439 --> 00:10:01.329 My sister will continue on this theme for us ...