>>> HI, I'M JOYCE CHILDERS AND I AM MAKING THIS VIDEO IN ORDER TO AUDITION FOR THE GUEST HOST POSITION AT QVC. AND AS YOU CAN SEE WE ARE IN MY CLOSET BECAUSE MY FORTE IS -- CLOSET -- UH -- ORGANIZATION. IN CLOSET. AND I AM REALIZING RIGHT NOW THAT MY PANTIES ARE ALL BEHIND MY HEAD. AND NOW I LOOK LIKE A PANTY ADDICT. THANKS, JOE. >> WHAT? I THOUGHT IT WAS GOOD. >> JOE, NOW YOU'RE IN MY SHOT, JUST DO IT AGAIN. PLEASE, LET'S DO IT AGAIN. >> HI. I'M CHRISTIE BERKIE. AND THIS IS MY AUDITION REEL FOR GUEST HOST FOR QVC. RIGHT AWAY, I JUST WANT TO SAY THAT I DO KNOW THAT MY FRIEND AND NEIGHBOR JOY CHILDERS IS AUDITIONING AS WELL. SHE IS AN AMAZING PERSON. BUT I DO THINK SHE IS -- NO. I'M NOT GOING TO SAY ANYTHING BAD. I'LL JUST SAY THAT ALL OF MY FRIENDS THINK THAT -- NOPE. I JUST SAID I WASN'T GOING TO SAY ANYTHING BAD. SHE IS WHAT SHE IS. YOU CAN ALWAYS JUST GOOGLE HER, YOU KNOW. WHICH I THINK YOU SHOULD. AND STUFF WILL COME UP. I LOVE HER! UM, OKAY. ACCESSORIES. WE ARE CURRENTLY IN MY NECKLACE ROOM. AND WHAT I WANT TO SHOW YOU IS -- OH MY GOD! I JUST STEPPED ON THE DOG! HE CAN'T BE IN HERE, LOUIS! >> WELL, I DON'T KNOW. >> PEANUT HAS TO BE IN HIS CRATE! AND NOW THAT'S ONE POINT FOR JOYCE BECAUSE I LOOK LIKE A DICK THAT KICKS DOGS IN THE BUTT, GREAT. START OVER, CUT. GREAT, LEWIS. [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] >> HI. IT'S ME, JOYCE. FUTURE QVC HOST. YOU KNOW, I JUST WANT YOU GUYS TO KNOW THAT QVC IS MY NUMBER ONE DREAM. AND EVERY SINGLE PERSON THAT KNOWS ME HAS SAID THAT I WAS BORN TO DO THIS. AND THERE ARE PEOPLE OUT THERE THAT ARE OKAY WITH LIKE HIJACKING DREAMS BECAUSE -- OKAY. I HAVE TO GET OUT OF HERE. I CAN'T BREATHE. >> ARE YOU OKAY? >> DON'T COME OVER HERE, YOU STRESS ME OUT! I'VE GOT TO GO WALK AROUND OUR CUL-DE-SAC -- DO NOT FOLLOW ME, DO NOT TOUCH ANYTHING, I AM FINE! OKAY! [ LAUGHTER ] >> HEY, GUYS. IT'S YOUR GAL PAL CHRISTIE BERKIE HERE TO SHOW YOU HOW TO DRESS UP ANY WORK OUTFIT AND GIVE IT A TOUCH OF SPARKLE AND GLAM WITH CLIP-ON GLAMOUR BAUBLES. LOOK HOW THIS GLISTENS IN THE SUNLIGHT. [ LAUGHTER ] WAS THAT JOYCE? DID I JUST SEE JOYCE IN OUR WINDOW? >> THAT WAS JOYCE. >> WHAT IS THAT BITCH UP TO? [ LAUGHTER ] ANYWAY, WE'LL JUST CUT AROUND THIS. OKAY. THESE IMITATION CRYSTAL PIECES WILL ENLIVEN ANYTHING -- [ LAUGHTER ] >> I SEE YOU! I SEE YOU, GET OVER HERE! >> WHAT? >> WHAT ARE YOU DOING? WHAT ARE YOU EVEN DOING? >> WHAT ARE YOU DOING? STEALING DREAMS? THAT FRIENDS KNOW IS FOR ME? >> THAT IS NOT GOOD ENGLISH, YOU WILL NEVER MAKE IT WITH THAT KIND OF ENGLISH ON QVC. >> ON QVC, ON QVC! THAT'S WHAT YOU SOUND LIKE. GET YOUR OWN LIFE! >> I HAVE IT! I HAVE A LIFE! STOP TALKING ABOUT IT BECAUSE I HAVE IT! [ LAUGHTER ] >> MAYBE I SHOULD TAKE IT AWAY. YOU SEE WHAT THIS IS IN MY POCKET? >> I DON'T KNOW WHAT THAT IS, JOYCE. OKAY? I HAVE NO IDEA. >> WELL, WHAT DO YOU THINK THAT HANDLE'S TO? [ LAUGHTER ] >> OH, IS THAT YOUR GUN? IS THAT WHAT THAT IS? LOUIS, SHE BROUGHT HER GUN, SURPRISE SURPRISE, I GUESS SHE'S GOING TO KILL ANOTHER PERSON ON ACCIDENT! >> IF I DO IT WOULD YOU STOP STEALING? >> JOYCE, DON'T BE A FOOL. >> THIS IS ALL GOING TO QVC, THIS IS ALL GOING TO QVC, JOYCE! >> NO, NO, IT'S NOT! >> YES, IT IS. THIS IS MY AUDITION TAPE AND IT CAN BE WHATEVER I WANT. >> HONEY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? >> YOUR WIFE IS GOING TO SHOOT US THROUGH OUR WINDOW. >> IT'S NOT A REAL GUN, IT'S FOR THE PLAY I'M DIRECTING. >> OH MY GOD, JOYCE. YOU ARE SUCH A JOKE. >> OH REALLY. YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT'S A BETTER JOKE? YOUR HUSBAND IS GAY. AND I KNOW IT BECAUSE HE'S SLEEPING WITH MY HUSBAND. [ LAUGHTER ] I HEAR THEM EVERY NIGHT IN OUR BABY'S ROOM LIKE, OH, YEAH. I WANT IT. >> STOP IT! >> OKAY, CHRISTE? ARE YOU GOING TO SEND THAT TO QVC, I'M SURE THEY'D LOVE THAT. >> GET OUT OF MY HOUSE! >> AARRGHH! [ STATIC ] ♪♪♪ [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] >> WELL GUYS THAT HOUR JUST FLEW BY. >> I GUESS THAT'S JUST WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU GUEST HOST QVC WITH YOUR BEST FRIEND. >> KEEP SHOPPING, YOU GUYS! ♪♪♪ [ LAUGHTER ] [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]