WEBVTT

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My father's conversation
with me was daily.

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My grandfather talked to me as 
a black man from Augusta, Georgia,

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growing up
in the deep south.

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It's probably right
my older brother

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had this conversation

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but then it's more
of like...

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you know...

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wear a condom, do this--

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you know, it's like
little man lessons.

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When a cop
pulls you over.

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When you get pulled over,

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not if
you get pulled over.

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At some point you
will get pulled over.

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And here is how you act.

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As a young black man

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growing up in New York

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I've had, you know,

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a few run-ins with the police

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and being completely innocent.

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Some people pull us out of the car,

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throw us on the floor, it's in February,

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so it's snow

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and slush and stuff on the ground.

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Put their knees on our back,

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put their guns to our head.

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As I'm putting my hands

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on the steering wheel,

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so I don't make the police nervous,

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I realize how nervous I was.

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and then I realize my
children were nervous.

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The thing that people say is

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you have to talk to him

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before he

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experience racism himself.

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But when is that?

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He is going to turn into

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a large scary black man.

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And that is not who he is

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but that's how he will be perceived.

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And I know what this kid is going to

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he's going to look like him.

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You know, I know what
he is going to look like.

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I'm a large scary
black man?

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You are a large
scary black man, okay?

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That's a problem in and of itself.

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I am not large. Nor scary.

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I can't do anything
with that.

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I'm sure, anyway, go ahead.

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It's frightening.

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And I'm being very light

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when I use the word frightening.

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If something goes wrong

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your first line
of defense,

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you know, the parents

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not being there, is
to go to the police.

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If you're Caucasian.

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That's what you
teach your children.

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Unfortunately it can't
work for black children.

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It doesn't mean
that every

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police officer is
inherently a bad person.

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But what it does mean is

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that the police force,
that institution,

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does not look out
for your best interest.

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There's this unspoken code
of racism

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and white supremacy

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that says that my life
does not matter.

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You can put your hands up

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and cooperate

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and say that I'm choking
and still be killed

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and then there is
no repercussions.

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It's maddening.
I get so frustrated

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and angry

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about having
to prepare my kids

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for something that

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that they're
not responsible for.

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I mean these are
conversations that

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people of other races
do not

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have to have
with their children.

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The conversation with
him was really just:

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"Look,

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you are a beautiful young boy..."

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Being an African American

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is a wonderful thing,

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it's a wonderful blessing.

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You have come
from great people.

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But it's also a hard thing.

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In America

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because of your skin color

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as a black boy

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and as a black man

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we are going to be dealing

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with a lot of danger.

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Under no circumstance

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are you to talk
to the police

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if you're arrested
until I get there.

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Do what they say.

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Don't get into any arguments.

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Make sure your hands are out

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of your pockets
so they can see.

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These are the questions
you can ask.

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This is who to call.

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This is what happens

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if this bad thing is done.

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"Please master
don't whip me" No!

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It like: "Excuse me sir,

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what is your batch
number?

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I'm going to film this."

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If you want police
brutality to stop.

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If you want police

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to treat you like a human being

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you have to see yourself
as a human being.

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You have every right
in this world

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that anyone else does.

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What I love about you
as my son

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is I remember

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when we thought
about having you

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and, you know, knowing
that we wanted you.

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And watching you grow.

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You are Muhammad Ali,

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you are Malcolm X,

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you are Martin Luther
King.

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You are an amazing
young man

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and the future is yours.

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and I will do my best
to make sure you're safe.

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That's it.
I love you.