My father's conversation
with me was daily.
My grandfather talked to me as
a black man from Augusta, Georgia,
growing up
in the deep south.
It's probably right
my older brother
had this conversation
but then it's more
of like...
you know...
wear a condom, do this--
you know, it's like
little man lessons.
When a cop
pulls you over.
When you get pulled over,
not if
you get pulled over.
At some point you
will get pulled over.
And here is how you act.
As a young black man
growing up in New York
I've had, you know,
a few run-ins with the police
and being completely innocent.
Some people pull us out of the car,
throw us on the floor, it's in February,
so it's snow
and slush and stuff on the ground.
Put their knees on our back,
put their guns to our head.
As I'm putting my hands
on the steering wheel,
so I don't make the police nervous,
I realize how nervous I was.
and then I realize my
children were nervous.
The thing that people say is
you have to talk to him
before he
experience racism himself.
But when is that?
He is going to turn into
a large scary black man.
And that is not who he is
but that's how he will be perceived.
And I know what this kid is going to
he's going to look like him.
You know, I know what
he is going to look like.
I'm a large scary
black man?
You are a large
scary black man, okay?
That's a problem in and of itself.
I am not large. Nor scary.
I can't do anything
with that.
I'm sure, anyway, go ahead.
It's frightening.
And I'm being very light
when I use the word frightening.
If something goes wrong
your first line
of defense,
you know, the parents
not being there, is
to go to the police.
If you're Caucasian.
That's what you
teach your children.
Unfortunately it can't
work for black children.
It doesn't mean
that every
police officer is
inherently a bad person.
But what it does mean is
that the police force,
that institution,
does not look out
for your best interest.
There's this unspoken code
of racism
and white supremacy
that says that my life
does not matter.
You can put your hands up
and cooperate
and say that I'm choking
and still be killed
and then there is
no repercussions.
It's maddening.
I get so frustrated
and angry
about having
to prepare my kids
for something that
that they're
not responsible for.
I mean these are
conversations that
people of other races
do not
have to have
with their children.
The conversation with
him was really just:
"Look,
you are a beautiful young boy..."
Being an African American
is a wonderful thing,
it's a wonderful blessing.
You have come
from great people.
But it's also a hard thing.
In America
because of your skin color
as a black boy
and as a black man
we are going to be dealing
with a lot of danger.
Under no circumstance
are you to talk
to the police
if you're arrested
until I get there.
Do what they say.
Don't get into any arguments.
Make sure your hands are out
of your pockets
so they can see.
These are the questions
you can ask.
This is who to call.
This is what happens
if this bad thing is done.
"Please master
don't whip me" No!
It like: "Excuse me sir,
what is your batch
number?
I'm going to film this."
If you want police
brutality to stop.
If you want police
to treat you like a human being
you have to see yourself
as a human being.
You have every right
in this world
that anyone else does.
What I love about you
as my son
is I remember
when we thought
about having you
and, you know, knowing
that we wanted you.
And watching you grow.
You are Muhammad Ali,
you are Malcolm X,
you are Martin Luther
King.
You are an amazing
young man
and the future is yours.
and I will do my best
to make sure you're safe.
That's it.
I love you.