Let's go. Open up. It's time for parkour.
Alright, time for my mandatory parkour check. Sigh. Let's get this over with.
You're late. You know the deal. You can do the one block jump for the raw chicken, or
you can attempt the one block vertical jump for the beef.
Here, in parkour civilization, no one chooses to jump for
the beef. It's better to be safe and do the one block jump for the chicken rather
than risk your entire life for just half a hunger bar more.
Tomorrow, you better not be late. Or you'll be doing two block jumps as
punishment.
Yes, sir. Sorry, I won't be late next time.
Down here, us parkour noobs only get fed once a day.
One piece of raw chicken is just enough to get you to the next day.
But that's the life of parkour civilization.
If you wanna survive, you have to parkour.
Every parkour noob has the same goal.
And that's to make it to the top layer where all the parkour pros live.
Except most parkour pros are born on the top layer.
If you're a parkour noob, there's only one way up.
And that is through the Temple of Parkour.
The Temple of Parkour is the only structure in the world that combines the
bottom layer to the top layer.
To make it up, you have to do an incredibly hard parkour course that no
parkour noob has ever completed.
And that's assuming you even get the chance to complete the course.
The inside of the temple is protected by a barrier.
And the only way a parkour noob gets past a barrier is if they've earned a ticket.
I've never even tried getting a ticket before, but if I'm gonna rank up to a
parkour pro one day, I'm gonna have to.
In my neighborhood pretty much everyone has fallen into the void and died
except for the guy who lives right next to me.
He's been my neighbor for five years.
No! Why did you try going for the beef?
I guess I have to change my statement.
I now live in in this neighborhood alone.
In parkour civilization, only parkour pros are allowed to break or place blocks.
For parkour noobs, it's strictly prohibited.
And unfortunately, I found that out the hard way.
A while ago I was searching around and I somehow stumbled upon an oak log.
No one has seen an oak log in years since trees don't exist in parkour civilization
so I had to try to take it.
Stop right now.
Oh no, I'm done for.
You really thought you could break that without me noticing?
What, were you gonna try to cheat parkour?
No, sir, I didn't try to cheat. I just thought it would be super rare and I
wanted to collect it.
Stop talking. Give me two jumps now.
Two jumps in a row? Okay. Sorry sir, I'll do it right now.
You know what? You seem a little too happy about two. Let's make it three.
Okay? I'll do three...
You know what? Now let's make it four jumps in a row.
Ah, four in a row? Come on.
In parkour civilization it should be no surprise that all punishments were just
more forms of parkour.
And that was the last time I ever tried breaking a block.
You're lucky you got a light punishment. Don't forget you're at the bottom
so follow the rules.
It's safe to say that if you're at the bottom level of parkour civilization
it's not exactly the best.
But not everything in parkour civilization is that bad.
For example, I was able to use parkour to buy the biggest house in the neighborhood.
In parkour civilization literally everything is parkour
and that means parkour has replaced money.
Welcome. Choose which house you wanna buy.
It's pretty nice in parkour civilization, all you have to do to buy anything is just
make more parkour jumps.
I'm not really sure why or how parkour works as a currency, but all I know is
I basically bought a two-storey house for free.
Somehow when I was buying my house I convinced myself to go for the ladder jump
to buy the bigger house.
In parkour civilization parkour jumps with trickier items like ladders are worth more
That's why this jump basically bought me a mansion.
No way! Thank you for buying the big house
Let me take you right to it. Just follow me.
Let's go! This is awesome, I just bought my first house.
All houses in parkour civilization are pre-built.
And they all have one thing in common.
It's a requirement that every single house has a parkour jump inside to get to your
bed. This is a way to make sure everyone in parkour civilization parkours
everywhere they go. Even inside the house.
So, this is the neighborhood you'll be living in. You're the only two-storey
house here. So if you'll follow me, I'll give you a house tour.
This is so sick! That ladder jump literally made me the richest one in the
neighborhood.
As you can see, you have a jump on the top floor and a jump on the bottom floor.
Let me show you the upstairs and then the house is all yours.
Alright, I mean everything looks good. I just have to do this jump to my bed.
Uh, yeah! I think I got everything figured out.
Perfect. Last thing, I just need to check if your parkour jump is good.
How are you supposed to check if it's good?
Wait, what the?
Did this guy for real just jump off?
Uh... I'm really confused. Is he alive? Why did he do that?
Alright, just wanted to confirm that your house is ready to move in.
The guy did in fact die so everything should be good.
That guy seriously died?
Uh... don't worry about it. It's a part of the job. Enjoy your house.
How is that a part of the job? What?
No one really remembers how parkour civilization started.
Most of the parkour noobs down here at least think that the parkour pros were the
ones who started it.
But the truth is, I think I was the one who started it.
For some reason, I can't remember the best but I'm pretty sure this is how the
story went.
Yo, Seawatt.
Yo, hello?
Bro, you think I could get a diamond real quick? I was mining for like three hours
and I only found two diamonds, and I just wanna make a diamond pickaxe.
Uh, sorry. Don't have any to spare.
Bro, come on. Don't be like that, you're literally just holding one.
Dude, just gimme one and I'll pay you back later. I just need a pickaxe.
Alright, fine. Give me one second. If you want a diamond, you gotta give me
something. Alright, watch out. Back off for one second.
Look. If you can make this four-block jump I'll pay you one diamond.
Make this four-block jump? Wait, why? Why are you gonna pay me to
do parkour? What do you even gain from this?
Uh, I don't know. I've just never seen anyone do it before.
I'd pay to see it done.
Okay, I'll take the offer.
Ugh, this is so annoying. Alright, just give me a second.
I know it's possible, I've done it before.
I told you bro, it's not possible.
Just stop talking and watch, I'm gonna do it in like 30 seconds.
Aaaand, there we go. Finally. Look, I told you it was possible.
No way, that was actually incredible! Alright, well, I got my money's worth.
Let's go, I got paid for parkour!
If you want, I can keep making more parkour to do and I'll pay you for it.
Are you kidding? Dude, totally. Alright, I'll be back here tomorrow
I guess.
And this is basically how parkouring for money started.
The next day I showed up to see Seawatt's house, he offered me way more diamonds
this time and he constructed an entire parkour course outside of his house to do.
But little did we know that this parkour course would completely change the way
that the world works.
Soon after this event, the parkour civilisation began.
Now that I think about it, there's kind of an unexplainable gap between those events
and now, but... oh well!
Parkour check time, you got 30 seconds.
Ah, another beautiful morning and I have to parkour for some more raw chicken that
will make me starve even more.
Alright, alright, I'm here.
One block for raw chicken, one block vertical for beef.
What are you choosing today?
Considering my neighbor just died for going for the beef, I'm just gonna go with
the chicken again.
Keep in mind, there's a ticket event today
It's gonna be about 200 blocks west.
This was huge news. If there actually was a ticket event today, I would need to go
for the beef. Ticket events are usually far away and I would starve by the time
I got there if I chose the chicken. But luckily I got the beef.
No way, you made that jump? You might become a parkour pro one day.
Wait, you really think I could rank up to be a parkour pro?
Ha, not a chance. You're a parkour noob. You guys never rank up.
It's important to know that parkour pros have really big egos and they like to put
down the parkour noobs.
This was an important day. This was only the second time I've jumped for the beef
and now, I have a chance to earn a ticket.
The ticket events are so risky because they're located so far away.
If I wasn't paying attention, I could miss just one of these one-block jumps and my
entire chances of becoming a parkour pro would be over.
But luckily, I made it to the ticket event
When I got here, there were only three parkour noobs in line to do the parkour
course. Most noobs don't even show up for the courses anymore because if you miss
one jump, you end up like this guy.
And that's the price you pay if you want a ticket to be a parkour pro.
I watched as the second noob fell to the void.
Hey man, do you think you could go already?
I don't know man, I'm kinda nervous I'm gonna fall.
No, you don't need to be nervous. I'm sure you're fine.
Oh, shoot... okay? Never mind then.
Before going for it I wanted to study the parkour course.
You see, every week, the ticket challenge changes.
And it's completely random.
And this week's course was extremely difficult.
There was a two-block jump to get to the ticket and if you get it a two-block jump
to get out of it.
Here's the thing about parkour civilization.
Parkour can be used for anything. And that includes bribing parkour pros.
Check this out. If I do a parkour jump with a 360 will you replace one of the
two-block jumps with a one-block jump?
You wanna do a one-block jump with a 360? Fine. There's no way you're gonna make it
but I'll accept.
Let's go, the parkour pro accepted my bribe and now I have another problem
I have to do a 360? Have I even done this before?
Whatever, I'm just gonna go for it. Please make it.
Oh, no way. I actually did it.
Alright, deal's a deal, right?
I'm not gonna lie, that was the coolest thing I've seen a parkour noob do.
Well, deal's a deal. Here you go.
Let's go. Now there was only one two-block jump in the course.
Still gotta make the first two-block jump, noob.
Yeah yeah whatever, just let me do the course, bro.
This was my best chance to finally earn a ticket. If I actually get this ticket
I could access the parkour temple and make my way up into a better life as a
parkour pro. There was no turning back now.
I had to start the course.
Most parkour noobs aren't experienced with diagonal jumps.
But somehow I got past it.
And now was the two-block jump. This was life or death.
I closed my eyes and I went for it.
I expected to be falling thousands of feet per second into the void but to my
surprise, I was standing on the platform with the ticket.
And thanks to the deal I made with the parkour pro, I only had a one-block jump
to get out of the course.
This was life changing. This was the first time I've ever received a ticket to access
the parkour temple. And I promised myself that I wasn't going to waste it.