WEBVTT 00:00:00.852 --> 00:00:03.946 (elderly voice) Dial up Internet's fine! I downloaded a whole song 00:00:03.946 --> 00:00:06.864 - in just five hours! - (Ian) SHUT UP!!! 00:00:08.208 --> 00:00:10.248 Dude, are you sure this is a safe shortcut? 00:00:10.248 --> 00:00:13.315 Yeah, man. My inner Christopher Columbus is navigating us safely. 00:00:13.315 --> 00:00:15.093 That's a terrible example, dude. 00:00:15.093 --> 00:00:17.571 Christopher Columbus didn't even end up in the right country. 00:00:17.571 --> 00:00:19.860 And then he brought a bunch of smallpox and death and all-- 00:00:19.860 --> 00:00:21.243 No, dude! Freedom. 00:00:21.741 --> 00:00:24.396 He brought us all freedom. I mean, look around you. 00:00:24.396 --> 00:00:25.649 This is... 00:00:26.067 --> 00:00:26.789 Really! 00:00:28.648 --> 00:00:30.944 - Dude, it's an iPod Mini. - (sighs) 00:00:30.944 --> 00:00:33.439 Haven't seen one of these since 2004. 00:00:33.439 --> 00:00:35.963 Yeah, that thing's ancient, okay? Put it down and wash your hands. 00:00:35.963 --> 00:00:36.822 It probably doesn't even work. 00:00:36.822 --> 00:00:38.568 Hold on. Let me just try it. 00:00:38.568 --> 00:00:43.737 What?! I'm the iGenie and since you woke me up from my slumber, I'm gonna 00:00:43.737 --> 00:00:47.747 grant you three wishes! Yeeeah! Okaaaay! 00:00:48.097 --> 00:00:49.559 Holy sh*t. Is this real? 00:00:49.559 --> 00:00:50.723 What should we wish for? 00:00:50.723 --> 00:00:52.577 Just think of your greatest desire. 00:00:52.577 --> 00:00:55.117 Like, if it were me, I would wish for a black president. 00:00:55.297 --> 00:00:56.696 Okaaaay! 00:00:56.696 --> 00:01:00.749 - Uh, yeah, about that-- - Okay, he's probably not up-to-date 00:01:00.749 --> 00:01:02.455 about all the current events. Probably been trapped 00:01:02.455 --> 00:01:04.467 in this piece of sh*t since 2004. 00:01:04.467 --> 00:01:08.534 Ooh, that's why he's doing the Dave Chappelle/Little John thing. 00:01:08.534 --> 00:01:10.684 Sorry, we've just been exposed to it for a few years 00:01:10.684 --> 00:01:12.678 and it's really f*cking annoying. 00:01:12.678 --> 00:01:18.423 Um...well then, iGenie, I wish for the biggest TV ever. 00:01:18.573 --> 00:01:20.839 Hella kazam! Alakazee! 00:01:21.269 --> 00:01:24.708 Get these pretty-haired dudes a big ass TV! 00:01:27.155 --> 00:01:29.238 What the f*ck is that piece of garbage? 00:01:29.238 --> 00:01:32.345 What did you wish for? The biggest TV ever. 00:01:32.585 --> 00:01:36.018 Look, it's state-of-the-art, and it's easily the biggest on the market. 00:01:36.018 --> 00:01:38.812 It weighs 300 pounds! Yeeeeah! 00:01:38.812 --> 00:01:39.734 No, no, no, no, no, no. 00:01:39.734 --> 00:01:42.661 There's LCD screens way bigger than that! 00:01:42.661 --> 00:01:43.750 Y'all got LCD? 00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:44.835 Yeah. 00:01:46.275 --> 00:01:48.271 Nah, bra. I can't do that anymore. 00:01:48.591 --> 00:01:50.334 You raver kids are crazy! 00:01:51.704 --> 00:01:55.885 Okay, um...how about we wish for something a little smaller. 00:01:55.885 --> 00:01:56.746 Okay. 00:01:57.886 --> 00:02:00.233 - Give me the new iPhone. - Yeah, yeah. 00:02:01.473 --> 00:02:03.740 Alakazam! Alakazone. 00:02:04.130 --> 00:02:07.605 Get these tight bottom dudes the most state-of-the-art phone! 00:02:09.885 --> 00:02:11.152 - (chuckles) - What? 00:02:11.152 --> 00:02:15.027 Now, I don't know what an iPhone is, but it can't be better than a Razr. 00:02:15.207 --> 00:02:16.491 'Cause that's the sh*t! 00:02:17.031 --> 00:02:20.800 Look, it flips and it's got the best predictive text on the market. 00:02:21.000 --> 00:02:22.604 But you can't even shoot video on this piece of-- 00:02:22.604 --> 00:02:25.422 What?! A phone that can shoot video? 00:02:25.702 --> 00:02:28.779 Okay, future space man guy. 00:02:28.779 --> 00:02:31.389 No, seriously, they all do. I can show you on YouTube. 00:02:31.849 --> 00:02:33.043 What's YouTube? 00:02:33.373 --> 00:02:35.309 You know, the place where you watch videos? 00:02:35.309 --> 00:02:37.648 Ooh, like Blockbuster Video. 00:02:37.648 --> 00:02:41.239 Uh, no. Video rental stores don't exist anymore. 00:02:41.239 --> 00:02:43.577 Well, how do you rent your videos then? 00:02:44.127 --> 00:02:45.189 The Internet? 00:02:45.829 --> 00:02:47.900 Like where I send my emails from? 00:02:47.900 --> 00:02:49.553 - Well, at least he knows email. - Yes. 00:02:49.553 --> 00:02:50.807 - Yes. - That's a start. 00:02:50.807 --> 00:02:53.862 Man, you know I love my hotmail.com! 00:02:55.312 --> 00:02:56.481 (together) What? 00:02:57.371 --> 00:03:00.495 I mean, it's totally cool if... you want to look at... 00:03:00.835 --> 00:03:02.164 males online, but-- 00:03:02.164 --> 00:03:06.470 What?! No, no, man! No. HotMAIL. 00:03:06.670 --> 00:03:08.090 Like the email site. 00:03:08.090 --> 00:03:10.073 Oooh, I see. When you put the emphasis 00:03:10.073 --> 00:03:12.891 on MAIL it kinda sounds like you're talking about hot dudes. 00:03:12.891 --> 00:03:14.615 See, I don't know what you guys are talkin' about. 00:03:14.615 --> 00:03:17.670 I say Hotmail correctly. You guys are sayin' it wrong. 00:03:17.670 --> 00:03:19.622 - Hotmail. - HotMAIL. 00:03:19.622 --> 00:03:21.320 - Hotmail. - HotMAIL! 00:03:21.320 --> 00:03:22.462 - Hotmail. - HotMAIL. 00:03:22.462 --> 00:03:23.840 - Hotmail. - HotMAAAAIL. 00:03:23.840 --> 00:03:25.075 - Hotmail. - HotMAIL. 00:03:25.075 --> 00:03:25.902 - Hotmail. - HotMAIL. 00:03:25.902 --> 00:03:26.819 - Hot. - Hot. 00:03:26.819 --> 00:03:27.852 - Mail. - MAIL. 00:03:27.852 --> 00:03:29.283 - Hotmail. - HotMAIL. 00:03:29.283 --> 00:03:30.174 - (together) Hotmail! - HotMAIL. 00:03:30.174 --> 00:03:31.180 - Hotmail. - HotMAIL. 00:03:31.180 --> 00:03:33.027 You know what? This is getting weird. 00:03:33.387 --> 00:03:36.173 Is it cool if we just wish for our last wish right now? 00:03:36.173 --> 00:03:37.252 Yeah, go on. 00:03:37.252 --> 00:03:40.024 Okay, I wanna go on a date with Jessical Biel. 00:03:40.024 --> 00:03:43.267 Uggh! The little girl from Seventh Heaven?! 00:03:43.327 --> 00:03:46.796 Well, how about somebody hot, like Lindsay Lohan! 00:03:46.796 --> 00:03:47.496 Yeeeah! 00:03:47.496 --> 00:03:48.563 - No! - Ugh! 00:03:48.563 --> 00:03:49.182 - God! - Seriously?! 00:03:49.182 --> 00:03:49.887 No! 00:03:49.887 --> 00:03:52.677 Okay...uh, Amanda Bynes. 00:03:52.677 --> 00:03:54.617 No, that's worse. 00:03:54.617 --> 00:03:58.607 Okay, what about, um, my girl Avril. I know she's still bangin', you know? 00:03:58.607 --> 00:04:01.345 (singing) He was a skater boy. She says, "See ya later, boy." 00:04:01.345 --> 00:04:02.788 She married the dude from Nickelback. 00:04:02.788 --> 00:04:06.590 Noooooooooo! 00:04:07.123 --> 00:04:08.197 What?! 00:04:10.037 --> 00:04:12.888 I give up! You guys do your own last wish. 00:04:13.488 --> 00:04:14.080 Really? 00:04:14.080 --> 00:04:15.461 Yeah, I'm sick of this sh*t. 00:04:15.601 --> 00:04:20.019 I think I'm gonna wish for something like to become famous on YouTube, 00:04:20.489 --> 00:04:23.450 for having absolutely no talent except good hair. 00:04:23.450 --> 00:04:24.632 Wait! No. 00:04:25.167 --> 00:04:26.377 Haven't you seen Aladdin? 00:04:26.596 --> 00:04:30.443 We have to use our last wish to grant the genie his freedom. 00:04:35.133 --> 00:04:36.650 You know what? You're right. 00:04:37.010 --> 00:04:41.008 iGenie, I wish for you to have freedom! 00:04:43.822 --> 00:04:45.650 Hey, what the f-ck is this sh-t! 00:04:45.650 --> 00:04:49.007 Dammit, dude! Your idea of freedom is smallpox! 00:04:49.007 --> 00:04:52.137 Ah, goddamn it! I'm just as bad as Christopher Columbus. 00:04:52.137 --> 00:04:54.139 I hate me so much right now! 00:04:54.139 --> 00:04:56.625 Just screw you guys. Just get outta here! 00:05:00.865 --> 00:05:04.087 You know what? It's kinda crazy how quickly we forget about 00:05:04.087 --> 00:05:07.674 all these things and they really only happened a few years ago. 00:05:07.904 --> 00:05:10.818 Yeah, it's like we're so obsessed with the new technology 00:05:10.818 --> 00:05:13.195 that we forget the classic stuff that was just fine. 00:05:13.195 --> 00:05:14.677 So you gonna keep that iPod? 00:05:14.677 --> 00:05:17.207 Hell, no! It's an obsolete piece of sh*t! 00:05:17.887 --> 00:05:20.526 (narrator) This video was brought to you by Hotmail. 00:05:20.526 --> 00:05:22.271 Hotmail. Remember us? 00:05:22.771 --> 00:05:23.563 No? 00:05:24.283 --> 00:05:25.175 Yeah... 00:05:25.445 --> 00:05:26.541 No one does. 00:05:27.711 --> 00:05:30.986 (Anthony) Hey, guys, so we somehow got a calendar with our faces on it 00:05:30.986 --> 00:05:35.134 in a bunch of real stores and it's also available online, 00:05:35.134 --> 00:05:38.170 so click here to get it if you want our faces on your wall, 00:05:38.170 --> 00:05:43.830 watching you every moment of every day. 00:05:46.095 --> 00:05:49.657 And if you wanna watch bloopers from this video, and this... 00:05:53.294 --> 00:05:55.278 ..click that little box on the left. 00:05:56.388 --> 00:05:59.021 (Ian) And if you haven't already, click that subscribe button. 00:05:59.021 --> 00:06:01.680 Yeeeah! What?! Okaaay! 00:06:01.680 --> 00:06:04.703 (Anthony) Oh my god! Shut up! It's not 2004 anymore. 00:06:04.853 --> 00:06:05.781 (Ian) Uh, okay. 00:06:05.781 --> 00:06:06.921 [Captioned by Subtitle YouTube]