[whispering] Exclusive!

♪ ♪

Hello.

Uh, welcome to another episode
of Between Two Ferns.

I'm your host, Zack Galifinakis and
my guest today is Char-lies Th-ron.

Charlize Theron.

That's o--

That's okay, everybody does that.

Charlize Th-ron,

Theron, like herron.

Theron.

Like heroin.

No, just Theron.

Just throw it away.

So you were in Monsters Inc.

[laughing]

No.

Oh that's humorous.

Oh, you were in the movie Monster.

Monster, yeah, just Monster.

Did you win an Oscar for that?

I did.

Where's your Oscar statue?

It's in my house.

I think it'd be cool like if you hung
it from your like rearview mirror,

in your car,

with a high school tassel.

[laughing]

Where did that come from?

That just--that stuff just hangs out in your head?

That's funny.

[laughing]

Do you write it down?

You're really funny.

Just remember it.

So it says here you're a dog lover.

Yeah, very much.

Do you have a dog?

I have a few.

Yeah, I adopt them and I actually recently
just adopted one from the pound

and he actually has this really horrible disease 
called leishmaniasis, and it's like a cancer.

So we're--he's on medication right
now and we're--we hope he pulls through.

It's a pretty bad disease.

They don't know that much
about it here in America.

We have a new sponsor.

Is this the camera?

Sorry. I just--

We have a new sponsor of the show,

We have a new sponsor of the show,

Need for Speed: Shift.

Which camera, this one?

Video game.

What's his name?

Old boy.

Old boy?

Like uh--

Oh boy wish my dog wasn't sick?

[chuckling]

Um--

[chuckling]

You okay?

Because of the dog?

No, I'm fine, don't worry about it.

You're sweet for asking though.

What was your--um--how often
do you go back to South Africa?

I go quite a bit, you know.

Have you been?

Yes.

And did you go alone, or
did you go with a girlfriend?

Or a--

Uhh--

Alone?

I've--

I have a--

I have a girlfriend.

That's great.

She looks a little bit like you.

Real--

Oh wow.

That's such a nice compliment.

Thank you.

And a lot like Dog the Bounty Hunter.

[laughing]

That's funny.

[laughing]

You must make her laugh all the time.

It's warm in here.

Don't, don't put this on camera.

Come her--

My thighs are so 
sweaty right now.

It's like dripping all the way
down to the back of my knees.

Look at this.

I think the only thing that could cool me
off right now is jumping naked into a pool.

It's so fucking hot.

What--

Are you--

Are you asking me to go with you?

Where?

The naked pool.

[laughing]

Oh my God!

You are hilarious!

I wasn't joking.

You know how you made it really funny?

Is because the image of me and you, like, like, me 
naked in a pool with like a fat garden gnome, like--

[laughing].

That's like really good!

You are really good!

You are really good.

I hope your dog dies.

[laughing]

I just pissed myself.

♪ ♪