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[whispering] Exclusive!

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♪ ♪

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Hello.

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Uh, welcome to another episode
of Between Two Ferns.

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I'm your host, Zack Galifinakis and
my guest today is Char-lies Th-ron.

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Charlize Theron.

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That's o--

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That's okay, everybody does that.

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Charlize Th-ron,

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Theron, like herron.

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Theron.

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Like heroin.

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No, just Theron.

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Just throw it away.

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So you were in Monsters Inc.

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[laughing]

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No.

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Oh that's humorous.

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Oh, you were in the movie Monster.

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Monster, yeah, just Monster.

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Did you win an Oscar for that?

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I did.

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Where's your Oscar statue?

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It's in my house.

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I think it'd be cool like if you hung
it from your like rearview mirror,

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in your car,

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with a high school tassel.

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[laughing]

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Where did that come from?

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That just--that stuff just hangs out in your head?

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That's funny.

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[laughing]

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Do you write it down?

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You're really funny.

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Just remember it.

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So it says here you're a dog lover.

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Yeah, very much.

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Do you have a dog?

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I have a few.

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Yeah, I adopt them and I actually recently
just adopted one from the pound

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and he actually has this really horrible disease 
called leishmaniasis, and it's like a cancer.

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So we're--he's on medication right
now and we're--we hope he pulls through.

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It's a pretty bad disease.

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They don't know that much
about it here in America.

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We have a new sponsor.

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Is this the camera?

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Sorry. I just--

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We have a new sponsor of the show,

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We have a new sponsor of the show,

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Need for Speed: Shift.

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Which camera, this one?

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Video game.

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What's his name?

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Old boy.

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Old boy?

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Like uh--

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Oh boy wish my dog wasn't sick?

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[chuckling]

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Um--

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[chuckling]

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You okay?

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Because of the dog?

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No, I'm fine, don't worry about it.

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You're sweet for asking though.

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What was your--um--how often
do you go back to South Africa?

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I go quite a bit, you know.

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Have you been?

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Yes.

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And did you go alone, or
did you go with a girlfriend?

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Or a--

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Uhh--

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Alone?

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I've--

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I have a--

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I have a girlfriend.

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That's great.

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She looks a little bit like you.

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Real--

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Oh wow.

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That's such a nice compliment.

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Thank you.

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And a lot like Dog the Bounty Hunter.

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[laughing]

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That's funny.

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[laughing]

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You must make her laugh all the time.

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It's warm in here.

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Don't, don't put this on camera.

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Come her--

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My thighs are so 
sweaty right now.

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It's like dripping all the way
down to the back of my knees.

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Look at this.

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I think the only thing that could cool me
off right now is jumping naked into a pool.

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It's so fucking hot.

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What--

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Are you--

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Are you asking me to go with you?

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Where?

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The naked pool.

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[laughing]

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Oh my God!

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You are hilarious!

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I wasn't joking.

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You know how you made it really funny?

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Is because the image of me and you, like, like, me 
naked in a pool with like a fat garden gnome, like--

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[laughing].

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That's like really good!

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You are really good!

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You are really good.

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I hope your dog dies.

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[laughing]

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I just pissed myself.

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♪ ♪