WEBVTT

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There are many men in my life
that I look up to.

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I have two grandfathers
of the Windrush Generation

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that came to this country in the 1940s

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and now in their 80s,
have comfortably retired.

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I have a father: funny,
intelligent, and rich in wisdom.

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And sometimes, when I'm
in the presence of these men,

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I feel as if I'm
in the presence of greatness.

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But sometimes, when I look
too long into these eyes,

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I see eyes full of pain and regret.

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I see the eyes of men

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that didn't completely break
the cycles of abuse

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that they saw their fathers commit.

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I see men that claimed

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that they would be radically different
to the men that came before them,

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but sometimes, just sometimes,

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they find that they embody that
which they once despised,

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and it breaks them.

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I see eyes that speak volumes,

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but mouths that would never articulate
the pain that they feel.

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I speak of the men in my life,

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but really, my life is dominated by women.

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I come from a powerhouse

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of strong, fearless, passionate,
and compassionate women:

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two Caribbean immigrant grandmothers
that worked tirelessly for their families,

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whilst continuously overcoming the odds;

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a mother - the epitome
of strength and resilience;

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five sisters - the dreams
of our grandmothers;

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aunties and cousins whose wisdom
remains the soundtrack to my life;

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and a niece, Disney Channel,
emoji-obsessed

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(Laughter)

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but with the heart of everything
I could ever aspire to be.

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But three years ago,
something very strange happened.

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In a South London hospital,
at about quarter past midnight,

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for the first time in a very long time,
a little boy went into our lives.

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What were we going to do with a boy?

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It was all very new for us,
but we would have to deal with it,

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as you do.

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And I remember when he was born,
and I remember being transfixed,

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particularly by his eyes.

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Because when I looked into his eyes,
I didn't see eyes full of pain and regret.

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I saw eyes that were blameless

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and held inordinate propensity
for greatness.

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I saw eyes that could break cycles

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and redefine what masculinity meant
for a new generation of men;

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eyes that no longer had to be silenced;

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eyes that could cry --
and believe me, they would cry now!

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But how would they [gear] down the line?

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Feminism: we've been told it's about
ridding our culture of sexist thinking

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in order to liberate women.

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So, my nephew doesn't really come much
into that conversation.

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But if we saw feminism
as a means of freeing our culture

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from patriarchal thinking and domination,

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then the conversation would change.

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(Applause) (Cheers)

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Thank you.

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Narratives surrounding feminism
have often focused solely

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on why women need feminism.

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We focused on individuals,
the battle of men versus women

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rather than a multifaceted
system of patriarchy

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that, too, harms our bothers,
fathers, and friends.

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Of course, women face
the consequences of sexism

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in a very tangible way, on a daily basis,

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and so it makes sense that we would be
at the forefront of feminist movements

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and their attempts to end sexism.

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We face inequality in the workplace,

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we are discriminated against
much within public policy,

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and a president can be elected
into the so-called free world

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that espouses hate
and violence towards us.

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It is imperative that feminism
transforms and empowers women.

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But for me, realities of patriarchy
are realities that affect us all,

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and revolutionary feminist thought
is the understanding

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that being seriously committed to feminism
means being seriously committed

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to ridding our culture
of patriarchal thinking

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that harms both men and women.

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Because from an early age,

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boys are taught that they must
perform masculinity

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in an hegemonic manner

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or their chance
of social survival is slim.

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They are taught that they must be tough,

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and consequently, when they feel weak,
they must perform strength;

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when they feel inadequate,
they must perform confidence;

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and when they feel emotional,
they must only ever perform anger.

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So in 2014, when Emma Watson
became the bastion for modern feminism,

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claiming HeForShe was the mode in which
we needed to adopt a new feminism,

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I feel as if the point failed to grasp

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the entirety of the situation
we currently face.

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The campaign argued

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that men and boys
should be encouraged to take action

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against negative inequalities
faced by women and girls,

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in order to be agents of feminist change.

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In other words, men should be allies.

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But how can we ask men to just be allies

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when they are, too,
victimized by the same system?

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How can we ask men to be allies

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in a world that leaves them
20 more times more likely to be imprisoned

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because they are taught to be violent;

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four times more likely to commit suicide
because they are taught to be silent;

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and the least likely to ask for help,
both physically and mentally,

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because they are taught to be strong?

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Much of the performance
around masculinity

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is rooted in men not being able
to express how they feel

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in the same way that women can.

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And so, when I talk about radical
and revolutionary feminism,

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I talk about feminism
that understands the importance

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of ridding patriarchal culture
in men, for men.

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A feminism that understands
the importance of spaces

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where men can engage in dialogue
that patriarchal culture doesn't permit,

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where they can talk about their worries,
their interpersonal relationships,

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and their personal growth

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so that cycles of pain
and regret can be broken.

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At a quarter past midnight,

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when my beautiful nephew
entered this world,

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I asked myself,

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"How will a young black boy
from South London engage in a dialogue

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that encourages him
to think critically about masculinity,

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that inspires him to question
pre-existing notions

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of what it means to be a man,

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and to get to grips with the entirety
of who he is as an individual

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by exploring a plethora of his emotions?"

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Feminism, we've been told,
looks like this, this, and this.

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But what if I told you
that radical and revolutionary feminism

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was taking place right now,

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and it looks more like this,
this, and this?

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In 2016, [Tis, Donae'O] and Cadet
released a song which I consider to be

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one of the most radical and revolutionary
feminist projects of the year,

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"Letter to Krept."

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The song outlines the relationship
between himself and his cousin,

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another famous rapper, Krept.

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In the song, he outlines his fragmented
relationship with his cousin,

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and discusses how
constant comparison to his cousin

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has caused him much pain.

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He publicly voices troubles
he has had within his family relationship

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and outlines mechanisms for healing.

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He finishes the song
by telling his cousin that he loves him,

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and reverses the narrative of what male,
particularly black male relationships

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are supposed to look like.

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Cadet subverts the notion
that grime is hyper-masculine

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in more ways than one,

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and shows how rap can be used
to subvert particular discourse

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within popular culture music.

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If that wasn't legendary enough,
his cousin released a song replying,

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telling his side of the story.

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For me, the two rappers indicate

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what healing patriarchal discourse
in the public square can look like.

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Rap, a culture that foreign eyes
have often dubbed as hyper-masculine,

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has provided a space where two men
can engage in healing dialogue.

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And this song doesn't stand in isolation;

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it's true to say that rap
provides an outlet,

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whatever that outlet may be.

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Feminist thinking has always understood

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the importance of outlets.

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Black feminists in the 1960s,
in deviating from mainstream feminism,

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became increasingly concerned
with creating narratives

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that expressed their lives
and their realities.

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And it's true to say
that from such a generation,

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we saw some of the best literature
a generation ever saw.

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From the likes of Maya Angelou,
to bell hooks, and Toni Morrison,

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rap continues that legacy.

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This is a genre of music

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that expresses the complexities
and realities of modern urban life.

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It's provided an outlet of emotion

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and the successful means
of getting men to engage in issues

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that affect their lives
and their communities.

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And yes, it is true to say
there is that rap music

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which embodies
that which we wouldn't consider

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to represent feminist ideals.

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However, it is dangerous
to observe these realities

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within a cultural vacuum.

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If rap is patriarchal,
capitalist, and misogynist,

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surely it's because it reflects a world

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that is equally, if not more so,
patriarchal, capitalist, and misogynist,

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and not because these are concepts
that have been created by this culture.

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Rap is indeed a culture,
and it is diverse,

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and it speaks many different languages,

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and far too often we've only been told
of one those languages that it speaks.

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And so the argument
that rap embodies all these evils

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is ill-informed, short-sighted,

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and a narrative
that too often we have heard.

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But what if we flipped the narrative?

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What if we saw rap differently?

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If we saw it as a mode

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in which men have been able
to discuss their emotions

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in a vulnerable and fragile way.

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Men who have been told
that their emotions aren't valuable

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find a space where such value is given.

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And in a society
where a growing number of men,

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particularly black men,

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are suffering from mental health problems

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as a result of this lack of communication,

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this mode of dialogue
should be celebrated as revolutionary,

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and not evil and backwards.

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bell hooks famously said

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that "the soul of feminist politics
is the commitment to ending

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patriarchal domination over the lives
of men and women, boys and girls."

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And it is here, where we will see freedom.

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Our happiness, our existence

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is predicated upon the fullness
in which we can live,

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and if men were able to live
in that fullness,

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free from patriarchal domination
over their lives,

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our realities would change,

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we would see a cultural revolution.

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For far too long, mainstream feminism
has critiqued a genre of music

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that may be the closest thing
to radical feminism we have ever seen.

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Because feminism wants to heal
patriarchal destruction,

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and rap has and continues to provide

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a means of dealing
with some of that destruction.

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Rap and feminism can be best friends,

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they just need to look at each other
with a new set of eyes.

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Because we're living in a world

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where hearts stop beating
and eyes start closing

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every single day

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because of the realities of patriarchy.

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But we need to live in a world
where eyes can live, heal, and transform,

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because the mandom need feminism,

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and my nephew and little boys
across the world

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need eyes that glisten with hope,

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so that they, their sons,
and their grandsons can live fuller lives.

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Thank you.

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(Applause)