1
00:00:00,902 --> 00:00:03,500
When people find out
I write about time management,

2
00:00:04,588 --> 00:00:06,263
they assume two things.

3
00:00:07,564 --> 00:00:10,548
One is that I'm always on time,

4
00:00:11,747 --> 00:00:12,984
and I'm not.

5
00:00:13,525 --> 00:00:14,870
I have four small children,

6
00:00:14,894 --> 00:00:17,710
and I would like to blame them
for my occasional tardiness,

7
00:00:17,734 --> 00:00:19,842
but sometimes it's just not their fault.

8
00:00:20,365 --> 00:00:23,112
I was once late to my own speech
on time management.

9
00:00:23,136 --> 00:00:24,176
(Laughter)

10
00:00:24,200 --> 00:00:27,773
We all had to just take a moment
together and savor that irony.

11
00:00:28,972 --> 00:00:32,191
The second thing they assume
is that I have lots of tips and tricks

12
00:00:32,215 --> 00:00:34,108
for saving bits of time here and there.

13
00:00:34,132 --> 00:00:37,846
Sometimes I'll hear from magazines
that are doing a story along these lines,

14
00:00:37,870 --> 00:00:41,197
generally on how to help their readers
find an extra hour in the day.

15
00:00:41,221 --> 00:00:44,507
And the idea is that we'll shave
bits of time off everyday activities,

16
00:00:44,531 --> 00:00:45,708
add it up,

17
00:00:45,732 --> 00:00:47,906
and we'll have time for the good stuff.

18
00:00:47,930 --> 00:00:51,964
I question the entire premise
of this piece, but I'm always interested

19
00:00:51,988 --> 00:00:54,671
in hearing what they've come
up with before they call me.

20
00:00:54,695 --> 00:00:55,847
Some of my favorites:

21
00:00:55,871 --> 00:00:58,777
doing errands where you only
have to make right-hand turns --

22
00:00:58,801 --> 00:00:59,829
(Laughter)

23
00:00:59,853 --> 00:01:01,999
Being extremely judicious
in microwave usage:

24
00:01:02,023 --> 00:01:04,746
it says three to three-and-a-half
minutes on the package,

25
00:01:04,770 --> 00:01:07,206
we're totally getting in on
the bottom side of that.

26
00:01:07,230 --> 00:01:09,969
And my personal favorite,
which makes sense on some level,

27
00:01:09,993 --> 00:01:13,745
is to DVR your favorite shows so you can
fast-forward through the commercials.

28
00:01:13,769 --> 00:01:16,061
That way, you save
eight minutes every half hour,

29
00:01:16,085 --> 00:01:18,182
so in the course of two hours
of watching TV,

30
00:01:18,206 --> 00:01:19,749
you find 32 minutes to exercise.

31
00:01:19,773 --> 00:01:20,789
(Laughter)

32
00:01:20,813 --> 00:01:22,098
Which is true.

33
00:01:22,587 --> 00:01:25,208
You know another way to find
32 minutes to exercise?

34
00:01:25,629 --> 00:01:27,961
Don't watch two hours of TV a day, right?

35
00:01:27,985 --> 00:01:29,001
(Laughter)

36
00:01:29,025 --> 00:01:32,499
Anyway, the idea is we'll save bits
of time here and there, add it up,

37
00:01:32,523 --> 00:01:34,807
we will finally get
to everything we want to do.

38
00:01:34,831 --> 00:01:37,743
But after studying how successful
people spend their time

39
00:01:37,767 --> 00:01:40,404
and looking at their
schedules hour by hour,

40
00:01:40,428 --> 00:01:43,724
I think this idea
has it completely backward.

41
00:01:44,305 --> 00:01:47,947
We don't build the lives
we want by saving time.

42
00:01:48,566 --> 00:01:50,126
We build the lives we want,

43
00:01:50,636 --> 00:01:53,603
and then time saves itself.

44
00:01:55,194 --> 00:01:56,345
Here's what I mean.

45
00:01:56,369 --> 00:01:58,063
I recently did a time diary project

46
00:01:58,087 --> 00:02:02,291
looking at 1,001 days in the lives
of extremely busy women.

47
00:02:02,315 --> 00:02:04,959
They had demanding jobs,
sometimes their own businesses,

48
00:02:04,983 --> 00:02:07,118
kids to care for,
maybe parents to care for,

49
00:02:07,142 --> 00:02:08,472
community commitments --

50
00:02:08,496 --> 00:02:10,309
busy, busy people.

51
00:02:10,799 --> 00:02:13,006
I had them keep track
of their time for a week

52
00:02:13,030 --> 00:02:15,343
so I could add up how much
they worked and slept,

53
00:02:15,367 --> 00:02:18,176
and I interviewed them
about their strategies, for my book.

54
00:02:18,200 --> 00:02:20,189
One of the women whose time log I studied

55
00:02:20,213 --> 00:02:22,276
goes out on a Wednesday night
for something.

56
00:02:22,300 --> 00:02:24,929
She comes home to find
that her water heater has broken,

57
00:02:24,953 --> 00:02:27,589
and there is now water
all over her basement.

58
00:02:28,380 --> 00:02:30,834
If you've ever had anything
like this happen to you,

59
00:02:30,858 --> 00:02:33,738
you know it is a hugely damaging,
frightening, sopping mess.

60
00:02:33,762 --> 00:02:36,472
So she's dealing with the immediate
aftermath that night,

61
00:02:36,496 --> 00:02:38,373
next day she's got plumbers coming in,

62
00:02:38,397 --> 00:02:41,897
day after that, professional cleaning
crew dealing with the ruined carpet.

63
00:02:41,921 --> 00:02:43,987
All this is being recorded
on her time log.

64
00:02:44,011 --> 00:02:46,311
Winds up taking seven hours of her week.

65
00:02:47,191 --> 00:02:48,473
Seven hours.

66
00:02:49,179 --> 00:02:51,981
That's like finding
an extra hour in the day.

67
00:02:52,834 --> 00:02:55,628
But I'm sure if you had asked her
at the start of the week,

68
00:02:55,652 --> 00:02:58,870
"Could you find seven hours
to train for a triathlon?"

69
00:02:59,893 --> 00:03:03,698
"Could you find seven hours
to mentor seven worthy people?"

70
00:03:03,722 --> 00:03:06,413
I'm sure she would've said
what most of us would've said,

71
00:03:06,437 --> 00:03:10,881
which is, "No -- can't you see
how busy I am?"

72
00:03:11,521 --> 00:03:13,318
Yet when she had to find seven hours

73
00:03:13,342 --> 00:03:16,141
because there is water
all over her basement,

74
00:03:16,165 --> 00:03:18,675
she found seven hours.

75
00:03:19,055 --> 00:03:23,206
And what this shows us
is that time is highly elastic.

76
00:03:23,594 --> 00:03:25,637
We cannot make more time,

77
00:03:25,661 --> 00:03:29,840
but time will stretch to accommodate
what we choose to put into it.

78
00:03:30,366 --> 00:03:32,933
And so the key to time management

79
00:03:33,541 --> 00:03:35,776
is treating our priorities

80
00:03:35,800 --> 00:03:38,847
as the equivalent
of that broken water heater.

81
00:03:40,162 --> 00:03:41,312
To get at this,

82
00:03:41,336 --> 00:03:44,781
I like to use language from one
of the busiest people I ever interviewed.

83
00:03:44,805 --> 00:03:47,093
By busy, I mean she was running
a small business

84
00:03:47,117 --> 00:03:48,586
with 12 people on the payroll,

85
00:03:48,610 --> 00:03:50,633
she had six children in her spare time.

86
00:03:50,657 --> 00:03:53,275
I was getting in touch with her
to set up an interview

87
00:03:53,299 --> 00:03:55,795
on how she "Had it all" -- that phrase.

88
00:03:55,819 --> 00:03:57,628
I remember it was a Thursday morning,

89
00:03:57,652 --> 00:03:59,659
and she was not available
to speak with me.

90
00:03:59,683 --> 00:04:00,839
Of course, right?

91
00:04:00,863 --> 00:04:03,282
But the reason she was
unavailable to speak with me

92
00:04:03,306 --> 00:04:05,246
is that she was out for a hike,

93
00:04:05,270 --> 00:04:07,308
because it was a beautiful spring morning,

94
00:04:07,332 --> 00:04:08,895
and she wanted to go for a hike.

95
00:04:08,919 --> 00:04:11,256
So of course this makes me
even more intrigued,

96
00:04:11,280 --> 00:04:14,456
and when I finally do catch up with her,
she explains it like this,

97
00:04:14,480 --> 00:04:16,747
she says, "Listen Laura, everything I do,

98
00:04:17,592 --> 00:04:21,205
every minute I spend, is my choice."

99
00:04:21,830 --> 00:04:22,981
And rather than say,

100
00:04:23,005 --> 00:04:25,434
"I don't have time to do x, y or z,"

101
00:04:25,893 --> 00:04:31,007
she'd say, "I don't do x, y or z
because it's not a priority."

102
00:04:31,709 --> 00:04:36,077
"I don't have time," often means
"It's not a priority."

103
00:04:37,075 --> 00:04:39,963
If you think about it,
that's really more accurate language.

104
00:04:39,987 --> 00:04:42,551
I could tell you I don't have time
to dust my blinds,

105
00:04:42,575 --> 00:04:43,744
but that's not true.

106
00:04:43,768 --> 00:04:46,208
If you offered to pay me $100,000
to dust my blinds,

107
00:04:46,232 --> 00:04:47,832
I would get to it pretty quickly.

108
00:04:47,856 --> 00:04:48,872
(Laughter)

109
00:04:48,896 --> 00:04:50,531
Since that is not going to happen,

110
00:04:50,555 --> 00:04:53,159
I can acknowledge this is not
a matter of lacking time;

111
00:04:53,183 --> 00:04:54,784
it's that I don't want to do it.

112
00:04:54,808 --> 00:04:58,194
Using this language reminds us
that time is a choice.

113
00:04:58,218 --> 00:04:59,391
And granted,

114
00:04:59,415 --> 00:05:02,447
there may be horrible consequences
for making different choices,

115
00:05:02,471 --> 00:05:03,677
I will give you that.

116
00:05:03,701 --> 00:05:05,323
But we are smart people,

117
00:05:05,347 --> 00:05:07,205
and certainly over the long run,

118
00:05:07,229 --> 00:05:09,229
we have the power to fill our lives

119
00:05:09,253 --> 00:05:11,929
with the things that deserve to be there.

120
00:05:13,204 --> 00:05:14,492
So how do we do that?

121
00:05:15,127 --> 00:05:16,559
How do we treat our priorities

122
00:05:16,583 --> 00:05:18,914
as the equivalent
of that broken water heater?

123
00:05:19,531 --> 00:05:21,850
Well, first we need
to figure out what they are.

124
00:05:21,874 --> 00:05:24,628
I want to give you two strategies
for thinking about this.

125
00:05:24,652 --> 00:05:26,410
The first, on the professional side:

126
00:05:26,434 --> 00:05:28,945
I'm sure many people
coming up to the end of the year

127
00:05:28,969 --> 00:05:31,292
are giving or getting
annual performance reviews.

128
00:05:31,316 --> 00:05:33,581
You look back over
your successes over the year,

129
00:05:33,605 --> 00:05:35,650
your "opportunities for growth."

130
00:05:35,674 --> 00:05:37,697
And this serves its purpose,

131
00:05:38,221 --> 00:05:41,151
but I find it's more effective
to do this looking forward.

132
00:05:41,175 --> 00:05:43,769
So I want you to pretend
it's the end of next year.

133
00:05:44,326 --> 00:05:46,687
You're giving yourself
a performance review,

134
00:05:46,711 --> 00:05:51,227
and it has been an absolutely
amazing year for you professionally.

135
00:05:52,034 --> 00:05:57,821
What three to five things did you do
that made it so amazing?

136
00:05:58,734 --> 00:06:02,534
So you can write next
year's performance review now.

137
00:06:02,558 --> 00:06:04,805
And you can do this
for your personal life, too.

138
00:06:04,829 --> 00:06:07,458
I'm sure many of you,
like me, come December,

139
00:06:07,482 --> 00:06:11,028
get cards that contain these folded up
sheets of colored paper,

140
00:06:11,491 --> 00:06:16,321
on which is written what is known
as the family holiday letter.

141
00:06:16,345 --> 00:06:17,983
(Laughter)

142
00:06:18,007 --> 00:06:20,638
Bit of a wretched genre
of literature, really,

143
00:06:20,662 --> 00:06:23,946
going on about how amazing
everyone in the household is,

144
00:06:23,970 --> 00:06:25,257
or even more scintillating,

145
00:06:25,281 --> 00:06:27,456
how busy everyone in the household is.

146
00:06:27,815 --> 00:06:29,464
But these letters serve a purpose,

147
00:06:29,488 --> 00:06:31,695
which is that they tell
your friends and family

148
00:06:31,719 --> 00:06:35,044
what you did in your personal life
that mattered to you over the year.

149
00:06:35,068 --> 00:06:36,452
So this year's kind of done,

150
00:06:36,476 --> 00:06:38,926
but I want you to pretend
it's the end of next year,

151
00:06:38,950 --> 00:06:41,704
and it has been an absolutely amazing year

152
00:06:42,172 --> 00:06:44,825
for you and the people you care about.

153
00:06:45,391 --> 00:06:50,094
What three to five things did you do
that made it so amazing?

154
00:06:50,839 --> 00:06:54,980
So you can write next
year's family holiday letter now.

155
00:06:55,789 --> 00:06:56,982
Don't send it.

156
00:06:57,006 --> 00:06:58,022
(Laughter)

157
00:06:58,046 --> 00:07:00,684
Please, don't send it.

158
00:07:01,049 --> 00:07:02,439
But you can write it.

159
00:07:02,463 --> 00:07:06,177
And now, between the performance
review and the family holiday letter,

160
00:07:06,201 --> 00:07:09,438
we have a list of six to ten goals
we can work on in the next year.

161
00:07:09,462 --> 00:07:12,261
And now we need to break
these down into doable steps.

162
00:07:12,285 --> 00:07:14,493
So maybe you want
to write a family history.

163
00:07:14,517 --> 00:07:16,770
First, you can read
some other family histories,

164
00:07:16,794 --> 00:07:18,056
get a sense for the style.

165
00:07:18,080 --> 00:07:21,287
Then maybe think about the questions
you want to ask your relatives,

166
00:07:21,311 --> 00:07:23,160
set up appointments to interview them.

167
00:07:23,184 --> 00:07:24,645
Or maybe you want to run a 5K.

168
00:07:24,669 --> 00:07:27,830
So you need to find a race and sign up,
figure out a training plan,

169
00:07:27,854 --> 00:07:30,227
and dig those shoes
out of the back of the closet.

170
00:07:30,251 --> 00:07:32,193
And then -- this is key --

171
00:07:32,217 --> 00:07:36,312
we treat our priorities as the equivalent
of that broken water heater,

172
00:07:36,336 --> 00:07:39,335
by putting them into our schedules first.

173
00:07:39,879 --> 00:07:44,639
We do this by thinking through our weeks
before we are in them.

174
00:07:44,663 --> 00:07:48,347
I find a really good time to do this
is Friday afternoons.

175
00:07:48,885 --> 00:07:51,433
Friday afternoon is what
an economist might call

176
00:07:51,457 --> 00:07:53,994
a "low opportunity cost" time.

177
00:07:54,764 --> 00:07:57,664
Most of us are not sitting there
on Friday afternoons saying,

178
00:07:57,688 --> 00:07:59,567
"I am excited to make progress

179
00:07:59,591 --> 00:08:01,887
toward my personal
and professional priorities

180
00:08:01,911 --> 00:08:03,065
right now."

181
00:08:03,089 --> 00:08:04,105
(Laughter)

182
00:08:04,129 --> 00:08:06,746
But we are willing to think
about what those should be.

183
00:08:06,770 --> 00:08:08,975
So take a little bit
of time Friday afternoon,

184
00:08:08,999 --> 00:08:15,189
make yourself a three-category priority
list: career, relationships, self.

185
00:08:16,382 --> 00:08:19,580
Making a three-category list reminds us

186
00:08:19,604 --> 00:08:23,094
that there should be something
in all three categories.

187
00:08:23,118 --> 00:08:24,374
Career, we think about;

188
00:08:24,398 --> 00:08:25,905
relationships, self --

189
00:08:25,929 --> 00:08:27,248
not so much.

190
00:08:27,272 --> 00:08:29,170
But anyway, just a short list,

191
00:08:29,194 --> 00:08:30,623
two to three items in each.

192
00:08:31,013 --> 00:08:33,394
Then look out over the whole
of the next week,

193
00:08:33,418 --> 00:08:35,133
and see where you can plan them in.

194
00:08:36,171 --> 00:08:38,181
Where you plan them in is up to you.

195
00:08:38,205 --> 00:08:41,667
I know this is going to be more
complicated for some people than others.

196
00:08:41,691 --> 00:08:45,213
I mean, some people's lives
are just harder than others.

197
00:08:45,674 --> 00:08:48,943
It is not going to be easy
to find time to take that poetry class

198
00:08:48,967 --> 00:08:51,697
if you are caring for multiple
children on your own.

199
00:08:52,058 --> 00:08:53,229
I get that.

200
00:08:53,253 --> 00:08:55,460
And I don't want to minimize
anyone's struggle.

201
00:08:55,484 --> 00:09:00,010
But I do think that the numbers
I am about to tell you are empowering.

202
00:09:00,906 --> 00:09:04,913
There are 168 hours in a week.

203
00:09:05,962 --> 00:09:10,663
Twenty-four times seven is 168 hours.

204
00:09:11,295 --> 00:09:14,028
That is a lot of time.

205
00:09:14,627 --> 00:09:17,818
If you are working a full-time
job, so 40 hours a week,

206
00:09:17,842 --> 00:09:20,934
sleeping eight hours a night,
so 56 hours a week --

207
00:09:20,958 --> 00:09:23,538
that leaves 72 hours for other things.

208
00:09:24,622 --> 00:09:26,529
That is a lot of time.

209
00:09:26,956 --> 00:09:28,841
You say you're working 50 hours a week,

210
00:09:28,865 --> 00:09:30,811
maybe a main job and a side hustle.

211
00:09:30,835 --> 00:09:33,305
Well, that leaves 62 hours
for other things.

212
00:09:33,329 --> 00:09:35,229
You say you're working 60 hours.

213
00:09:35,253 --> 00:09:37,681
Well, that leaves 52 hours
for other things.

214
00:09:37,705 --> 00:09:39,747
You say you're working more than 60 hours.

215
00:09:39,771 --> 00:09:41,328
Well ... are you sure?

216
00:09:41,352 --> 00:09:43,086
(Laughter)

217
00:09:43,110 --> 00:09:46,016
There was once a study comparing
people's estimated work weeks

218
00:09:46,040 --> 00:09:47,435
with time diaries.

219
00:09:47,459 --> 00:09:50,135
They found that people claiming
75-plus-hour work weeks

220
00:09:50,159 --> 00:09:52,263
were off by about 25 hours.

221
00:09:52,287 --> 00:09:53,981
(Laughter)

222
00:09:54,005 --> 00:09:56,326
You can guess in which direction, right?

223
00:09:57,567 --> 00:09:59,780
Anyway, in 168 hours a week,

224
00:09:59,804 --> 00:10:02,768
I think we can find time
for what matters to you.

225
00:10:02,792 --> 00:10:04,990
If you want to spend
more time with your kids,

226
00:10:05,014 --> 00:10:07,319
you want to study more
for a test you're taking,

227
00:10:07,343 --> 00:10:10,688
you want to exercise for three hours
and volunteer for two,

228
00:10:10,712 --> 00:10:11,866
you can.

229
00:10:11,890 --> 00:10:15,531
And that's even if you're working
way more than full-time hours.

230
00:10:15,885 --> 00:10:17,937
So we have plenty of time, which is great,

231
00:10:17,961 --> 00:10:19,187
because guess what?

232
00:10:19,211 --> 00:10:22,049
We don't even need that much
time to do amazing things.

233
00:10:22,486 --> 00:10:25,233
But when most of us have
bits of time, what do we do?

234
00:10:25,708 --> 00:10:27,359
Pull out the phone, right?

235
00:10:27,826 --> 00:10:29,995
Start deleting emails.

236
00:10:30,381 --> 00:10:32,468
Otherwise, we're puttering
around the house

237
00:10:32,492 --> 00:10:33,752
or watching TV.

238
00:10:34,114 --> 00:10:36,967
But small moments can have great power.

239
00:10:37,657 --> 00:10:39,610
You can use your bits of time

240
00:10:40,094 --> 00:10:42,290
for bits of joy.

241
00:10:43,195 --> 00:10:46,064
Maybe it's choosing to read
something wonderful on the bus

242
00:10:46,088 --> 00:10:47,452
on the way to work.

243
00:10:47,476 --> 00:10:49,875
I know when I had a job
that required two bus rides

244
00:10:49,899 --> 00:10:51,444
and a subway ride every morning,

245
00:10:51,468 --> 00:10:54,371
I used to go to the library
on weekends to get stuff to read.

246
00:10:54,395 --> 00:10:58,886
It made the whole experience
almost -- almost -- enjoyable.

247
00:10:59,857 --> 00:11:03,044
Breaks at work can be used
for meditating or praying.

248
00:11:03,434 --> 00:11:06,628
If family dinner is out
because of your crazy work schedule,

249
00:11:06,652 --> 00:11:09,401
maybe family breakfast
could be a good substitute.

250
00:11:09,890 --> 00:11:13,020
It's about looking at
the whole of one's time

251
00:11:13,044 --> 00:11:15,177
and seeing where the good stuff can go.

252
00:11:16,504 --> 00:11:18,217
I truly believe this.

253
00:11:19,054 --> 00:11:21,755
There is time.

254
00:11:22,981 --> 00:11:24,633
Even if we are busy,

255
00:11:25,223 --> 00:11:26,962
we have time for what matters.

256
00:11:27,752 --> 00:11:29,754
And when we focus on what matters,

257
00:11:30,312 --> 00:11:31,983
we can build the lives we want

258
00:11:32,765 --> 00:11:34,043
in the time we've got.

259
00:11:34,638 --> 00:11:35,793
Thank you.

260
00:11:35,817 --> 00:11:39,055
(Applause)