1 00:00:52,833 --> 00:00:56,667 One, two, three... 2 00:00:59,066 --> 00:01:00,328 Yo, what comes after three? 3 00:01:00,700 --> 00:01:02,827 Four. Four comes after three. 4 00:01:03,000 --> 00:01:04,991 - I don't hear you counting. - Four. 5 00:01:06,400 --> 00:01:08,061 Four. 6 00:01:08,233 --> 00:01:10,758 - Five. - Five. 7 00:02:03,666 --> 00:02:07,500 One, two, three... 8 00:02:07,666 --> 00:02:09,725 ...three, three. 9 00:02:09,900 --> 00:02:11,162 Yo, what comes after three? 10 00:02:11,533 --> 00:02:13,660 Four. Four comes after three. 11 00:02:13,833 --> 00:02:15,824 - I don't hear you counting. - Four. 12 00:02:17,233 --> 00:02:18,894 Four. 13 00:02:19,066 --> 00:02:21,591 - Five. - Five. 14 00:02:21,766 --> 00:02:24,234 - Six. - Six. Faster. 15 00:02:24,400 --> 00:02:27,164 - Seven, eight. - Sims. Sims! 16 00:02:27,333 --> 00:02:28,766 You're going home. 17 00:02:37,466 --> 00:02:39,093 I'll see you around, sweet mouth. 18 00:02:40,433 --> 00:02:42,094 Inmate on deck. 19 00:02:42,766 --> 00:02:44,961 - He'll be back. - What's up, baby? 20 00:02:45,133 --> 00:02:46,657 See you around, big man. 21 00:02:47,933 --> 00:02:49,594 Gate open. 22 00:03:12,199 --> 00:03:14,361 Where the hell is this guy? 23 00:03:24,366 --> 00:03:26,596 Cal. Cal. 24 00:03:31,533 --> 00:03:33,899 - What an idiot. - Let me pop this door for my man. 25 00:03:34,066 --> 00:03:36,057 My main man, just getting home from prison. 26 00:03:38,833 --> 00:03:42,428 - Percy. - I'm sorry, Cal. 27 00:03:42,599 --> 00:03:44,227 You stupid? 28 00:03:45,900 --> 00:03:48,835 All right, wait. Hold up. So they want us to steal a diamond? 29 00:03:49,000 --> 00:03:52,993 - How much your man Walken paying? - Dig this. A hundred G's. 30 00:03:53,166 --> 00:03:55,134 A hundred G's? 31 00:03:55,333 --> 00:03:57,597 - That's good loot. - Enough to get my label started. 32 00:03:58,133 --> 00:04:00,966 Let me give you a taste of my first single. 33 00:04:03,400 --> 00:04:05,163 - It's fire. - Yeah. 34 00:04:06,566 --> 00:04:08,124 Never been shot before... 35 00:04:08,300 --> 00:04:11,736 ...but I've been beat about the skull and the neck area with a crowbar. 36 00:04:11,900 --> 00:04:13,663 Check the lyrics, check the lyrics. 37 00:04:14,133 --> 00:04:15,862 I'll take you to the butcher shop 38 00:04:16,333 --> 00:04:18,563 Let you lick a big pork chop 39 00:04:18,733 --> 00:04:20,894 Girl, I know you like ham hocks 40 00:04:21,065 --> 00:04:24,365 If you're Jewish, I even got lox Hey! Hey! 41 00:04:25,266 --> 00:04:26,597 Yo, camel-mouth. 42 00:04:26,766 --> 00:04:30,361 - That's 50 Cent. - Cal, that's not 50 Cent. 43 00:04:30,533 --> 00:04:31,830 He talk about candy. 44 00:04:32,533 --> 00:04:34,398 I'm talking about meat. 45 00:04:34,566 --> 00:04:37,262 That's a whole other level. P-Unit. 46 00:04:37,433 --> 00:04:39,594 You better off stuffing your money in a mattress. 47 00:04:39,766 --> 00:04:42,530 Yeah. I bet you gonna mess your money up... 48 00:04:42,699 --> 00:04:44,167 ...on booze and cheap hookers. 49 00:04:44,333 --> 00:04:45,561 - So? - What you need to do... 50 00:04:45,733 --> 00:04:48,201 ...is iust find you a nice girl and settle down, Cal. 51 00:04:48,366 --> 00:04:50,197 Come on, P, you know that ain't happening. 52 00:04:50,366 --> 00:04:52,732 I mean, you being all short and all. 53 00:04:53,566 --> 00:04:55,431 Let me tell you something about love. 54 00:04:55,600 --> 00:04:59,161 I never had it. I don't want it. I don't need it. All right? 55 00:05:00,166 --> 00:05:02,828 You ain't gotta keep hitting me, Calvin. I'm not your child. 56 00:05:03,000 --> 00:05:06,902 How am I gonna be a hard-core rapper if you keep putting your hands on me? 57 00:05:07,066 --> 00:05:12,163 Don't push me Because I'm close to the edge 58 00:05:12,333 --> 00:05:15,200 Check this out. You hang in the back until Vanessa gets here. 59 00:05:15,366 --> 00:05:16,958 When I give a signal, you come out. 60 00:05:17,133 --> 00:05:18,191 That's cool. I got you. 61 00:05:18,366 --> 00:05:21,028 Hey, Jimmy, please, man. This is the biggest day of my life. 62 00:05:21,199 --> 00:05:24,499 - It's gotta go off right, okay? - Baby, what'd I tell you? I got you. 63 00:05:24,666 --> 00:05:26,156 And can I say something? 64 00:05:26,333 --> 00:05:29,097 - Congratulations, man. - Thank you. 65 00:05:29,266 --> 00:05:32,099 You done stepped up to the plate. Give me a hug, homeboy. 66 00:05:32,266 --> 00:05:35,429 Oh, man, you done did it, you know. 67 00:05:37,500 --> 00:05:40,367 Hey, man, you ain't had to do this. 68 00:05:41,366 --> 00:05:42,924 You know, the valet tripping. 69 00:05:43,100 --> 00:05:45,568 - Made me park around the corner. - Jimmy, get- Beat it. 70 00:05:45,733 --> 00:05:47,360 - Thank you. Thank you. - Get on it. 71 00:05:51,966 --> 00:05:54,730 - Hi. - Hey, beautiful. 72 00:05:56,266 --> 00:05:58,860 So I'm so glad that you got out of work to be here. 73 00:05:59,199 --> 00:06:03,967 You think I wouldn't take off work? And miss this? Are you crazy? 74 00:06:04,133 --> 00:06:05,862 Look at you, beautiful. 75 00:06:06,033 --> 00:06:08,900 - You are glowing. My God. - Thank you. 76 00:06:10,199 --> 00:06:12,065 It feels like it was iust yesterday... 77 00:06:12,566 --> 00:06:15,558 ...sitting in this same restaurant, when I asked you to marry me. 78 00:06:16,399 --> 00:06:19,233 I'm still working on that diamond. I didn't forget the diamond. 79 00:06:19,399 --> 00:06:23,063 I know, baby. You are the sweetest, most supportive man on the planet. 80 00:06:24,800 --> 00:06:25,824 Can I talk now? 81 00:06:26,000 --> 00:06:27,968 - I'm sorry. Go ahead. - Okay. 82 00:06:28,133 --> 00:06:30,863 So you know what I've been waiting all week to find out. 83 00:06:31,033 --> 00:06:32,728 Yes. Yep. 84 00:06:32,899 --> 00:06:35,095 - Well, I got the news... - Yeah. 85 00:06:35,266 --> 00:06:38,758 - ... and I'm- - Pregnant. Yes! Yes! 86 00:06:39,266 --> 00:06:41,826 - Having my baby - Oh, no. 87 00:06:42,000 --> 00:06:43,831 - Is so important to me - No. No, no. 88 00:06:44,000 --> 00:06:45,900 - Darryl. Darryl. - Baby. 89 00:06:46,066 --> 00:06:49,229 - There's nothing more special - Darryl- No, honey, I'm not pregnant. 90 00:06:49,399 --> 00:06:51,231 - I'm not pregnant. - Than to raise a family 91 00:06:51,399 --> 00:06:53,868 - Excuse me, sir. Sir. Sir. - I thought that you- 92 00:06:54,033 --> 00:06:55,159 - Hey. - And- 93 00:06:55,333 --> 00:06:56,800 - Sir. - Jimmy. 94 00:06:57,399 --> 00:06:59,334 - And- - Sir! 95 00:06:59,899 --> 00:07:01,993 No. Stop. No. 96 00:07:03,066 --> 00:07:04,328 I'm not pregnant. 97 00:07:05,366 --> 00:07:07,391 - No? - No. 98 00:07:12,699 --> 00:07:13,689 You're not pregnant? 99 00:07:13,866 --> 00:07:16,733 Baby, but you was nauseous and throwing up all over the place. 100 00:07:16,899 --> 00:07:18,265 Well, I was very nervous. 101 00:07:19,000 --> 00:07:20,661 Baby, what are we doing here? 102 00:07:21,766 --> 00:07:22,994 Darryl... 103 00:07:23,166 --> 00:07:24,963 ...I got the promotion. 104 00:07:25,133 --> 00:07:28,569 And we're movin' on up To the east side 105 00:07:28,733 --> 00:07:29,995 Jimmy. 106 00:07:30,166 --> 00:07:32,634 They'll be movin' on up To that apartment in the sky 107 00:07:32,800 --> 00:07:36,702 - I'm gonna hurt him. - Hey. Hey, Jimmy. Jimmy, stop. 108 00:07:36,866 --> 00:07:39,096 - Man- Man, you ain't got to do this. - Hey... 109 00:07:39,600 --> 00:07:41,568 - Okay, then. All right. - Beat it. 110 00:07:44,033 --> 00:07:46,263 Congratulations. I'm really proud of you. 111 00:07:48,833 --> 00:07:50,232 But? 112 00:07:51,100 --> 00:07:53,227 But I thought we was gonna start a family. 113 00:07:54,633 --> 00:07:56,533 We will, baby. 114 00:07:57,000 --> 00:08:00,231 You know, with this promotion, everything's on track now. 115 00:08:00,399 --> 00:08:04,427 In a couple of years I'll be senior V.P., and I can take time off to have a child. 116 00:08:04,600 --> 00:08:06,568 A couple of years? I don't wanna wait years. 117 00:08:06,733 --> 00:08:09,065 Darryl, you know, having a baby changes everything. 118 00:08:09,500 --> 00:08:11,297 Hey, I'm willing to do whatever it takes. 119 00:08:11,466 --> 00:08:13,559 So no more late-night poker with the guys. 120 00:08:14,333 --> 00:08:15,322 Cool. 121 00:08:15,966 --> 00:08:17,263 No more... 122 00:08:17,433 --> 00:08:19,162 ...afternoon quickies. 123 00:08:19,333 --> 00:08:21,824 Stop right there. We haven't had a afternoon quickie... 124 00:08:22,000 --> 00:08:23,331 ...since your father moved in. 125 00:08:23,500 --> 00:08:27,095 That is not fair. My dad is getting old. Sometimes he forgets things. 126 00:08:27,266 --> 00:08:29,564 I don't feel comfortable with him living by himself. 127 00:08:29,733 --> 00:08:30,995 What about Whispering Glen? 128 00:08:31,166 --> 00:08:33,726 That place looked like a country club inside the brochure. 129 00:08:33,899 --> 00:08:35,832 They got Viagra vending machines. 130 00:08:36,000 --> 00:08:36,989 You listen to me. 131 00:08:37,166 --> 00:08:40,727 Until he is a danger to himself or others, he is staying with us. 132 00:08:42,566 --> 00:08:43,760 Now... 133 00:08:43,933 --> 00:08:45,594 ...can we celebrate? 134 00:08:45,766 --> 00:08:50,760 Celebration, come on We gonna celebrate tonight 135 00:08:50,933 --> 00:08:54,164 Come on, come on, let's celebrate Let's not have a fight 136 00:08:54,333 --> 00:08:56,494 And I'm not talking tonight 137 00:08:56,666 --> 00:08:58,600 Remix! Now just you ladies 138 00:08:59,299 --> 00:09:03,760 Celebrate, celebrate Celebrate, celebrate 139 00:09:16,500 --> 00:09:18,764 Hey, oblivious. What are you doing? 140 00:09:18,933 --> 00:09:21,026 Getting ready to rob a iewelry store, Calvin. 141 00:09:21,200 --> 00:09:22,690 I'm going straight Jesse James. 142 00:09:22,866 --> 00:09:26,097 Percy, put the gun away. Guns is how you wind up back in prison. 143 00:09:26,266 --> 00:09:29,895 I'm telling you, I ain't going back to jail. You understand? 144 00:09:30,066 --> 00:09:31,761 Now put the gun away. 145 00:09:32,200 --> 00:09:33,758 Why you gotta keep hitting me, Cal? 146 00:09:33,933 --> 00:09:36,595 Sometimes I gotta slap some sense into you, Percy. 147 00:09:36,766 --> 00:09:37,824 Come on. Give me a hand. 148 00:09:42,033 --> 00:09:43,500 Now, would you trust the big man? 149 00:09:44,933 --> 00:09:46,423 I got a plan, yo. 150 00:09:47,066 --> 00:09:52,231 Now, this stone is a 3-karat, G- color diamond. 151 00:09:52,399 --> 00:09:56,200 - VVS2, nearly flawless. - It's been a pleasure, sir. 152 00:09:56,600 --> 00:09:58,158 Just be cool, Cal. I'm telling you. 153 00:09:58,466 --> 00:10:00,627 Oh, there she go. There's- 154 00:10:00,799 --> 00:10:02,267 Go ahead. Do your thing, Cal. 155 00:10:12,966 --> 00:10:15,434 Pardon me for iust a moment. 156 00:10:17,600 --> 00:10:19,830 - Do your thing. - Yes? May I help you? 157 00:10:21,500 --> 00:10:25,197 Percy. CEO and A&R of P-Unit Records. 158 00:10:25,366 --> 00:10:27,357 Here to pick up iewelry for one of my artists. 159 00:10:27,833 --> 00:10:29,858 Well, holler at your girl. 160 00:10:31,233 --> 00:10:32,598 Step this way, Percy P. 161 00:10:32,766 --> 00:10:34,757 I like the way you said my name just now. 162 00:10:34,933 --> 00:10:36,491 Can I sit down? She's sitting down. 163 00:10:36,666 --> 00:10:38,998 Of course you may. Would you like some gin and juice? 164 00:10:57,433 --> 00:10:59,901 Well, I'm gonna show you some shiznit right about now. 165 00:11:03,233 --> 00:11:06,828 Yes. Come to daddy. 166 00:11:18,799 --> 00:11:21,030 Now that's what I'm talking about, baby. 167 00:11:21,200 --> 00:11:23,327 So, what can I get for you today, Percy P.? 168 00:11:25,233 --> 00:11:27,201 All of the above. 169 00:11:31,100 --> 00:11:33,500 I'll send one of my assistants from P-Unit Records... 170 00:11:33,666 --> 00:11:34,928 ...to pick everything up. 171 00:11:35,100 --> 00:11:39,093 Just tell him to pull up to my bumper, and I'll throw that junk in his trunk. 172 00:11:39,733 --> 00:11:40,893 Word? 173 00:11:42,066 --> 00:11:44,125 Let me get up out of here. I gotta bounce. 174 00:11:44,299 --> 00:11:46,768 I got some people meeting me down there, and I gotta... 175 00:11:47,100 --> 00:11:49,159 So I'm gonna leave, you know? 176 00:11:49,566 --> 00:11:52,831 - Okay? See you later, all right? Peace. - Peace. 177 00:11:54,633 --> 00:11:56,157 Be cool. What's going on in there? 178 00:11:56,333 --> 00:11:57,994 Has anyone seen my dog? 179 00:11:59,633 --> 00:12:00,657 Hi, puppy. 180 00:12:06,066 --> 00:12:07,590 He stole my dog. 181 00:12:10,000 --> 00:12:10,989 Holy crap. 182 00:12:11,866 --> 00:12:13,766 The Queen's diamond. It's gone. 183 00:12:13,933 --> 00:12:16,697 Relax. We almost there, man. We about to be paid, man. 184 00:12:16,866 --> 00:12:19,664 I need the police. Yes, there's been a robbery. 185 00:12:22,000 --> 00:12:25,060 We did it. Modern-day Butch Cassidy and Sundance. 186 00:12:25,233 --> 00:12:27,428 Come back here with my dog. 187 00:12:28,033 --> 00:12:30,593 - Get out of here, mutt. - You just tossed a Chihuahua. 188 00:12:30,766 --> 00:12:33,599 - Come on, let's get out of here. - Gotcha that. We are gone. 189 00:12:33,766 --> 00:12:35,063 Come on, Percy. 190 00:12:37,833 --> 00:12:40,358 - Oh, man. - This ain't time to be doing doughnuts. 191 00:12:43,733 --> 00:12:45,030 I can't believe this, man. 192 00:12:45,366 --> 00:12:46,924 Damn it, Percy. 193 00:12:47,100 --> 00:12:50,001 You got a boot on the car, and you about to get one in your butt. 194 00:12:50,166 --> 00:12:52,100 - She finally got me. - Who? 195 00:12:52,266 --> 00:12:55,167 Nettie, down at Motor Vehicles. Said I got her pregnant. 196 00:12:55,333 --> 00:12:57,767 I went to family court. I had all my receipts. 197 00:12:58,733 --> 00:12:59,859 I'm out. 198 00:13:00,933 --> 00:13:03,595 - Hey, yo, Percy. You forgot something. - What? 199 00:13:03,766 --> 00:13:05,597 Me! 200 00:13:06,500 --> 00:13:09,492 - Come on! - Sorry, Cal. 201 00:13:17,533 --> 00:13:19,467 - They went that way. - What'd he look like? 202 00:13:19,633 --> 00:13:21,191 - Black. - I got him. 203 00:13:21,366 --> 00:13:23,493 - Dark or light? - Medium. 204 00:13:23,666 --> 00:13:26,157 Suspect is escaping on foot. African-American male. 205 00:13:26,333 --> 00:13:29,166 About 5'1 O", not real dark, more of a mocha-caramel color. 206 00:13:39,200 --> 00:13:40,724 What? You shot? 207 00:13:40,966 --> 00:13:43,867 Sweet beiesus. My muscle, I think I pulled it. 208 00:13:44,033 --> 00:13:45,830 Quick. In here. 209 00:13:48,666 --> 00:13:50,691 Yo, quick, put me down. We gotta split up. 210 00:13:50,866 --> 00:13:52,390 Okay. 211 00:14:00,766 --> 00:14:03,997 It's late because of the stress, not because I'm pregnant. 212 00:14:04,166 --> 00:14:07,658 Please, don't even say words like "stress. " It's not good for the baby. 213 00:14:08,166 --> 00:14:10,361 Darryl, there is no baby. 214 00:14:10,533 --> 00:14:12,660 - Aisle two. - Well, why didn't you just say that? 215 00:14:24,266 --> 00:14:27,633 - Okay, let's go. - Okay, fine. Just humor me, okay? 216 00:14:27,799 --> 00:14:29,495 - Okay, let's go. - Okay. 217 00:14:33,433 --> 00:14:37,369 - Enough. - Okay, okay. 218 00:14:43,700 --> 00:14:45,327 I got one! 219 00:14:50,733 --> 00:14:53,725 - Come on, man. - Do not resist. Do not resist. 220 00:14:53,899 --> 00:14:55,834 - I'm not resisting. - Wilson. Wilson. Wilson. 221 00:14:56,000 --> 00:14:57,433 Come on. It's not our guy. 222 00:14:57,600 --> 00:14:59,830 What? You said African-American. 223 00:15:00,133 --> 00:15:02,431 Yeah, but I said a mocha-caramel color. 224 00:15:02,600 --> 00:15:05,262 He's like a Starbucks black decaf, maybe a little cream. 225 00:15:05,733 --> 00:15:07,997 - It's not our guy. Sorry about that. - Come on, man. 226 00:15:08,166 --> 00:15:10,828 - You sure? - Yeah. He's okay. 227 00:15:13,733 --> 00:15:15,860 - Wilson! - Well, he looked mocha to me. 228 00:15:18,200 --> 00:15:20,998 - Thank you. - What? 229 00:15:23,166 --> 00:15:25,600 He looked real shady. He gonna do something else, and I'll be waiting. 230 00:15:28,200 --> 00:15:29,758 - You still got the diamond? - No. 231 00:15:29,933 --> 00:15:31,730 - I had to ditch it. - Where? 232 00:15:33,266 --> 00:15:34,824 In her bag. 233 00:15:35,000 --> 00:15:36,399 Calvin, now what? 234 00:15:36,566 --> 00:15:37,658 We go get it. 235 00:15:40,566 --> 00:15:42,397 Let's go. Come on. 236 00:15:49,933 --> 00:15:51,833 Follow that car. 237 00:16:13,833 --> 00:16:15,027 Yo, there they are. 238 00:16:15,200 --> 00:16:16,428 - There is no baby. - There is. 239 00:16:16,600 --> 00:16:19,068 - Honey, there is no baby. - Well, there will be. 240 00:16:20,100 --> 00:16:21,567 Let's go. 241 00:16:27,033 --> 00:16:28,227 Daddy, we're home. 242 00:16:28,600 --> 00:16:32,161 - There's my baby girl. - Hi, Daddy. 243 00:16:34,100 --> 00:16:36,159 Who's the best daddy in the whole, wide world? 244 00:16:36,333 --> 00:16:38,699 - I am. - I know you can do better than that. 245 00:16:38,866 --> 00:16:41,096 Who's the best daddy in the whole, wide world? 246 00:16:41,266 --> 00:16:44,030 - I am. - I can't hear you. 247 00:16:44,200 --> 00:16:46,361 I'm the best daddy in the whole, wide world! 248 00:16:59,433 --> 00:17:00,832 So, what's the good news? 249 00:17:01,000 --> 00:17:02,433 Dad... 250 00:17:02,600 --> 00:17:04,031 ...I got the promotion. 251 00:17:04,665 --> 00:17:08,693 Congratulations. Soon you'll make enough money to leave that bum. 252 00:17:08,866 --> 00:17:10,560 Oh, Dad, he's not a bum. 253 00:17:10,733 --> 00:17:13,429 No? What kind of man gives the woman he loves... 254 00:17:13,598 --> 00:17:15,192 ...a wedding ring with no diamond? 255 00:17:15,366 --> 00:17:18,529 Hey, as soon as I make enough money, I'm gonna buy her a diamond. 256 00:17:18,700 --> 00:17:21,098 And I'm going to do the nasty with Jennifer Lopez... 257 00:17:21,266 --> 00:17:24,165 ...while Halle Berry tickle my butt. 258 00:17:25,233 --> 00:17:27,929 You know, for a moment I thought you were gonna tell me... 259 00:17:28,098 --> 00:17:30,159 ...you were gonna let this one impregnate you. 260 00:17:30,333 --> 00:17:33,063 But I see now, this man ain't got no bullets in the chamber. 261 00:17:33,233 --> 00:17:34,700 What's that supposed to mean? 262 00:17:34,866 --> 00:17:36,834 You heard me. You're shooting blanks. 263 00:17:37,000 --> 00:17:39,662 - Cooking with a wet noodle. - What? 264 00:17:39,833 --> 00:17:41,664 Can't hoist the mainsail 265 00:17:41,833 --> 00:17:45,234 My sperm have fallen and it can't get up. 266 00:17:45,400 --> 00:17:47,391 I'll have you know, I hit that every night. 267 00:17:47,566 --> 00:17:49,397 Hey, that's my daughter you talking about. 268 00:17:49,566 --> 00:17:52,330 - Back up, old man. - Okay, okay. Stop. Stop. Please. 269 00:17:52,500 --> 00:17:53,524 Gentlemen. 270 00:17:53,700 --> 00:17:58,637 Dad, we are going to have a baby when the time is right. 271 00:17:59,433 --> 00:18:01,628 Play nice. 272 00:18:08,966 --> 00:18:10,160 It's still in the bag. 273 00:18:11,233 --> 00:18:14,134 Still in the bag. Let's go get the rock. 274 00:18:14,299 --> 00:18:17,861 Yo, Percy, how many times I gotta tell you? No guns. 275 00:18:18,033 --> 00:18:19,022 What we gonna do? 276 00:18:19,200 --> 00:18:22,169 Walken is gonna kill us if we don't give him the diamond. 277 00:18:22,333 --> 00:18:24,358 Then I guess we gotta find a way to sneak in. 278 00:18:28,566 --> 00:18:31,330 Well, they did say they wanted a baby. 279 00:18:32,266 --> 00:18:34,632 No. No. 280 00:18:34,799 --> 00:18:37,530 No. I ain't dressing up like no baby. 281 00:18:38,599 --> 00:18:41,433 Keep still, Cal. You heavy. You gonna make me drop you. 282 00:18:41,599 --> 00:18:44,091 You drop me and I'm gonna drop you. 283 00:18:44,266 --> 00:18:45,927 Now, look, you stay close. 284 00:18:46,099 --> 00:18:48,694 I'm gonna go in, I'm gonna get the diamond, and I'm out. 285 00:18:48,866 --> 00:18:53,166 If you don't mind me saying, Cal, you make a cute little baby. 286 00:18:53,333 --> 00:18:54,391 I'm out. 287 00:18:54,566 --> 00:18:56,830 You couldn't find nothing better than a dog basket? 288 00:18:57,000 --> 00:19:00,436 You iust be cool. I told you, this gonna be great, Cal. 289 00:19:04,400 --> 00:19:06,231 Just hold tight. Everything gonna be fine. 290 00:19:06,400 --> 00:19:08,561 I'm gonna be over here in the bushes. 291 00:19:17,466 --> 00:19:18,728 Move, dog. 292 00:19:18,900 --> 00:19:20,925 Get out of here. I'll make a coat out of you. 293 00:19:21,099 --> 00:19:23,432 Get out of here before I feed you some chocolate. 294 00:19:24,099 --> 00:19:26,568 Get out of here, you fleabag. 295 00:19:26,733 --> 00:19:28,394 - Go. - Get out of here. 296 00:19:28,566 --> 00:19:30,591 Wait, hold- Wait. Muttley, wait. No, no. 297 00:19:46,433 --> 00:19:47,832 Honey. 298 00:19:48,000 --> 00:19:49,729 - Yeah? - Come here. 299 00:19:50,099 --> 00:19:51,931 - What is it, Darryl? - Look. 300 00:19:54,833 --> 00:19:56,596 Oh, my God. 301 00:19:56,766 --> 00:19:58,233 It's a baby. 302 00:20:00,200 --> 00:20:02,225 I know. And here's a note too. 303 00:20:02,566 --> 00:20:04,761 "Plez luk tafter Kalvin. 304 00:20:04,933 --> 00:20:08,425 We wuzn't abele to keap em. " 305 00:20:08,599 --> 00:20:10,534 Poor guy. His parents must've been retarded. 306 00:20:11,400 --> 00:20:12,992 Well, let's get him inside. 307 00:20:13,166 --> 00:20:15,532 - It's cold out here. - Okay, okay. All right. 308 00:20:15,700 --> 00:20:16,894 Come on, little guy. 309 00:20:17,066 --> 00:20:18,931 - Yes. - I got you. 310 00:20:21,766 --> 00:20:23,324 Oh, damn. 311 00:20:23,866 --> 00:20:25,993 - What in the hell is that? - I don't know. 312 00:20:27,433 --> 00:20:28,832 Man. 313 00:20:29,233 --> 00:20:31,497 Dad, we found a baby on the doorstep. 314 00:20:31,666 --> 00:20:34,362 - What? What is it? A boy or girl? - Dada. 315 00:20:34,633 --> 00:20:35,998 I think it's a boy. 316 00:20:36,166 --> 00:20:38,327 Well, whatever it is, it smell like piss. 317 00:20:39,466 --> 00:20:42,162 Yeah. I think Janet may have left diapers here. Let's look. 318 00:20:42,333 --> 00:20:44,392 Doesn't your dad have some diapers upstairs? 319 00:20:44,566 --> 00:20:47,160 I heard that. I don't wear diapers. Who you talking about? 320 00:20:47,766 --> 00:20:49,256 Haven't worn a diaper in years. 321 00:20:49,433 --> 00:20:51,424 I think she put them in here. 322 00:20:58,799 --> 00:21:00,358 What is it? 323 00:21:02,266 --> 00:21:04,427 That ain't no baby. That's a porn star. 324 00:21:05,200 --> 00:21:08,169 What on girth is that? 325 00:21:09,000 --> 00:21:11,366 I'm gonna call Child Services. 326 00:21:11,533 --> 00:21:12,591 - Yeah. - Yeah. Do that. 327 00:21:19,000 --> 00:21:20,092 Directory assistance. 328 00:21:20,266 --> 00:21:23,064 Yes, can I have the number for Child Services, please? 329 00:21:23,233 --> 00:21:24,894 Connecting you. 330 00:21:25,766 --> 00:21:28,428 Child Services is now closed for the weekend. 331 00:21:28,599 --> 00:21:32,127 We will re-open at 9 a. m. Monday morning. 332 00:21:36,233 --> 00:21:37,666 They're closed for the weekend. 333 00:21:37,833 --> 00:21:40,597 The office doesn't open until 9:OO on Monday morning. 334 00:21:41,433 --> 00:21:42,525 So, what do we do now? 335 00:21:42,966 --> 00:21:46,333 I say, toss this creature back in the Black Lagoon where it came from. 336 00:21:46,500 --> 00:21:47,660 Daddy, stop it. 337 00:21:48,400 --> 00:21:50,561 Maybe we should call the police. 338 00:22:02,066 --> 00:22:05,399 - That doesn't sound good. - No, we should take him to the doctor. 339 00:22:05,566 --> 00:22:08,399 Get him checked out. Who knows what he's been through? 340 00:22:08,566 --> 00:22:10,033 - Okay? - I'll go get the car keys. 341 00:22:10,200 --> 00:22:11,189 - All right. - Okay. 342 00:22:12,033 --> 00:22:14,900 Now, when you get to the hospital, don't stop. Don't stop. 343 00:22:15,066 --> 00:22:17,534 Toss that monster out the window and keep moving. 344 00:22:17,700 --> 00:22:20,726 Hit the accelerator. I don't wanna see that little ugly thing again. 345 00:22:22,200 --> 00:22:24,225 Stinky little thing. 346 00:22:25,000 --> 00:22:26,399 Was it a little cough? 347 00:22:26,566 --> 00:22:27,555 - No. - No. 348 00:22:27,733 --> 00:22:31,191 No, this was like a grown-man, smoker's cough. 349 00:22:32,099 --> 00:22:34,364 Well, it's probably nothing. 350 00:22:34,533 --> 00:22:37,024 Come on, let's get his shirt off. 351 00:22:39,400 --> 00:22:42,528 He's a strong little fella. 352 00:22:46,566 --> 00:22:49,194 Oh, my God. What is that scar? 353 00:22:49,799 --> 00:22:51,324 From the look of it, I'd say... 354 00:22:51,500 --> 00:22:53,900 ...this little guy has had his appendix removed. 355 00:22:54,066 --> 00:22:55,897 Or he was in one hell of a knife fight. 356 00:22:59,333 --> 00:23:00,960 What kind of person tattoos a child? 357 00:23:01,133 --> 00:23:02,623 Oh, you'd be amazed. Come on. 358 00:23:03,633 --> 00:23:05,726 Open up. Open up and say: 359 00:23:05,900 --> 00:23:07,731 Come on. Come on. Come on. 360 00:23:12,066 --> 00:23:14,762 - Wha-? What is it? - I've never seen a... 361 00:23:14,933 --> 00:23:16,161 ...baby with bridgework. 362 00:23:17,233 --> 00:23:20,396 This child has the mouth of a 40-year-old man. 363 00:23:20,866 --> 00:23:25,303 I can't tell whether these teeth are coming in or falling out. 364 00:23:25,466 --> 00:23:27,093 Well, he's gonna be okay? 365 00:23:27,533 --> 00:23:28,830 He's fine. 366 00:23:29,000 --> 00:23:33,300 His tonsils are a little swollen and he might have a bit of a cold. 367 00:23:33,466 --> 00:23:34,455 As a precaution... 368 00:23:34,633 --> 00:23:37,397 ...you should take his temperature before you put him to bed. 369 00:23:37,566 --> 00:23:39,534 - All right. Thank you, Dr. Murphy. - Okay. 370 00:23:39,700 --> 00:23:42,260 - Thank you very much. - Bye. 371 00:23:43,099 --> 00:23:45,591 This is iust- It's horrible. Look at this child. 372 00:23:45,766 --> 00:23:47,631 Let's turn him over to the authorities. 373 00:23:47,799 --> 00:23:49,927 They can find his parents and prosecute them. 374 00:23:50,099 --> 00:23:51,567 Are you crazy? We can't do that. 375 00:23:51,733 --> 00:23:53,496 This kid's been through the wringer. 376 00:23:53,666 --> 00:23:55,998 Besides, his birth parents are probably crackheads. 377 00:23:56,166 --> 00:23:58,066 They're iust gonna put them in rehab. 378 00:23:58,233 --> 00:24:01,225 Then they'll be back on the street, selling him for a bag of rocks. 379 00:24:01,900 --> 00:24:04,130 What are you saying? 380 00:24:04,299 --> 00:24:06,530 I'm saying, why don't we just keep him? 381 00:24:06,933 --> 00:24:08,662 - Just until Monday. - No. No, Darryl. 382 00:24:08,833 --> 00:24:10,027 - Just until- - He's a child. 383 00:24:10,200 --> 00:24:12,760 - I don't know what to do with a child. - Just until Monday. 384 00:24:12,933 --> 00:24:14,798 And then we'll take him to Child Services. 385 00:24:14,966 --> 00:24:17,127 They'll find a home for him. 386 00:24:17,299 --> 00:24:20,360 Besides, who could take better care of this child than us? 387 00:24:23,333 --> 00:24:26,598 - Where is he? - Oh, man. 388 00:24:32,400 --> 00:24:34,766 Where do you think you're going? 389 00:24:35,700 --> 00:24:36,962 Well, what do we got here? 390 00:24:38,400 --> 00:24:40,163 - Is this your baby? - Yes, thank you. 391 00:24:41,200 --> 00:24:43,600 Well, actually... 392 00:24:43,766 --> 00:24:46,428 - ... we found him- - Mama. 393 00:24:51,533 --> 00:24:53,160 He called me Mama. 394 00:24:54,566 --> 00:24:55,590 There you go. 395 00:24:58,833 --> 00:25:01,495 Thank you, officer. Thank you. 396 00:25:02,766 --> 00:25:05,564 You know, Percy, I don't like having to look for people. 397 00:25:07,000 --> 00:25:09,025 Who, me? I wasn't hiding, Mr. W. 398 00:25:09,200 --> 00:25:10,531 Not Percy. Not the Kid. 399 00:25:10,700 --> 00:25:12,668 I was gonna come soon as I got the diamond. 400 00:25:13,099 --> 00:25:14,567 So you don't have my diamond, huh? 401 00:25:14,733 --> 00:25:16,200 No. I mean, I do. 402 00:25:16,366 --> 00:25:18,266 I don't have it on me now, but it's safe. 403 00:25:18,433 --> 00:25:21,493 We got everything on lockdown. Believe me. Trust me. 404 00:25:21,666 --> 00:25:23,930 You trying to hustle me, Percy? 405 00:25:24,400 --> 00:25:27,392 Hustle a hustler? Ain't nothing happening, Mr. W. 406 00:25:27,799 --> 00:25:30,633 It's iust that the robbery didn't go as smooth as we wanted to. 407 00:25:30,799 --> 00:25:33,963 And a situation had popped up, so we had to split. 408 00:25:34,133 --> 00:25:37,193 - But my partner, he- - Your partner is not my problem. 409 00:25:37,366 --> 00:25:39,834 My problem is I don't have my diamond. 410 00:25:40,233 --> 00:25:42,224 Now, I'm gonna give you 24 hours. 411 00:25:42,400 --> 00:25:45,665 After that, my problem becomes Bruno and Rosco's problem. 412 00:25:46,900 --> 00:25:48,265 And they... 413 00:25:48,433 --> 00:25:49,991 ...become your problem. 414 00:25:50,166 --> 00:25:51,531 You got a problem with that? 415 00:25:51,900 --> 00:25:54,130 Ain't got no problem with that, Mr. W. 416 00:25:54,299 --> 00:25:56,200 I got it all under control, I swear. 417 00:25:56,366 --> 00:25:58,527 Don't want a smudge on it, not a speck, nothing. 418 00:25:58,700 --> 00:26:00,759 Not a smudge. 419 00:26:01,166 --> 00:26:02,394 Okay, Mr. W. 420 00:26:03,433 --> 00:26:04,832 Get him out of here. 421 00:26:05,000 --> 00:26:06,968 - Get him out of here. - Come on. 422 00:26:13,066 --> 00:26:15,091 Ain't nothing better than the evening news... 423 00:26:15,266 --> 00:26:17,791 ...and my favorite, milk and cookies. 424 00:26:18,533 --> 00:26:20,694 Damn, I forgot my milk. 425 00:26:20,866 --> 00:26:23,096 Jeez, man, you can't be popping up like that. 426 00:26:23,566 --> 00:26:25,329 For a moment I thought you were Chucky. 427 00:26:25,866 --> 00:26:27,527 About to put you in a chokehold. 428 00:26:29,533 --> 00:26:31,125 What are you looking at? 429 00:26:32,033 --> 00:26:35,833 A man who exposed himself to police oflicers in a doughnut shop... 430 00:26:36,000 --> 00:26:38,366 ...claimed that voices made him do it. 431 00:26:38,533 --> 00:26:41,400 Oh, honey, look how comfortable he is with us. 432 00:26:41,566 --> 00:26:43,557 He is so cute. 433 00:26:43,733 --> 00:26:45,325 Oh, no, you don't. 434 00:26:45,500 --> 00:26:48,333 No, you don't. No, no, no. 435 00:26:48,500 --> 00:26:50,365 - Dad. - Come on, Pop, let him sit there. 436 00:26:50,533 --> 00:26:53,934 - Let him have a cookie. - This is my throne, my sanctuary. 437 00:26:54,099 --> 00:26:56,091 This is my air, my end zone. 438 00:26:56,266 --> 00:26:59,326 - It's iust a cookie. - Oh, it start with the cookie. 439 00:27:01,733 --> 00:27:05,760 Then they want to come to dinner. Then they want to move in. 440 00:27:06,333 --> 00:27:10,099 Next thing you know, they're married to your daughter. 441 00:27:10,666 --> 00:27:14,102 - Why he got to bring it back here- - Already made that mistake once. 442 00:27:14,266 --> 00:27:15,494 - Come on, now. - Honey. 443 00:27:15,666 --> 00:27:17,531 No more, my brother. 444 00:27:17,700 --> 00:27:20,897 Nobody makes a fool out of me. I'm from Detroit. 445 00:27:22,866 --> 00:27:24,424 - Everybody's here. - I can't wait... 446 00:27:24,599 --> 00:27:26,534 ...for everybody to meet little Calvin. 447 00:27:27,333 --> 00:27:28,891 - I'm so excited. - Yeah, yeah. 448 00:27:29,066 --> 00:27:32,695 Introduce him to everybody else, and go over to somebody else's house. 449 00:27:36,733 --> 00:27:38,325 Cookie got a little bite to it. 450 00:27:39,299 --> 00:27:41,734 - Hi. Come in, come in, come in. - Hello, hello, hello. 451 00:27:41,900 --> 00:27:45,529 - Hello, hello. - I'm so excited. 452 00:27:45,700 --> 00:27:46,928 - Hey. - Hello. 453 00:27:47,099 --> 00:27:51,127 - Consuela, welcome. Come in. - So where is the little one? 454 00:27:52,066 --> 00:27:57,094 - Here's Calvin. - Here's Calvin. 455 00:28:00,166 --> 00:28:02,600 - What a mess. - Honey, that's not nice. 456 00:28:02,766 --> 00:28:04,700 He's scary. 457 00:28:05,533 --> 00:28:07,592 Yeah, well, I mean... 458 00:28:08,566 --> 00:28:13,503 - I mean, lucky he's not yours, right? - Yeah. 459 00:28:15,166 --> 00:28:18,329 I iust think he is precious. I think he is a precious gift from God. 460 00:28:18,933 --> 00:28:20,264 You know, God gives gifts. 461 00:28:20,433 --> 00:28:24,836 Sometimes he wraps them in a hurry. Sometimes. Isn't he a precious gift? 462 00:28:25,433 --> 00:28:28,334 Oh, yeah. He's adorable... 463 00:28:28,933 --> 00:28:31,731 ...in a National Geographic sort of way. 464 00:28:33,433 --> 00:28:35,196 What is he, a pygmy? 465 00:28:39,666 --> 00:28:41,896 Consuela, why don't you take the kids to go play? 466 00:28:42,066 --> 00:28:43,363 Yes, good idea. Come on, guys. 467 00:28:43,533 --> 00:28:46,161 Tommy, show Nicholas that scissor-lock thing... 468 00:28:46,333 --> 00:28:47,823 ...we've been working on, huh? 469 00:28:49,966 --> 00:28:53,629 Hey, little man. No hard feelings, right? 470 00:28:56,666 --> 00:28:57,997 Give me five. 471 00:29:04,666 --> 00:29:07,032 Hey, guess what, Calvin? We brought you some stuff. 472 00:29:07,200 --> 00:29:09,760 We got you some stuff. We got a box full of bottles, bibs. 473 00:29:09,933 --> 00:29:13,130 Oh, and all of the Dinosaurus Rex tapes you could possibly want. 474 00:29:13,299 --> 00:29:15,063 Well, thank you. That's a lot of stuff. 475 00:29:15,233 --> 00:29:19,226 He is so cute. I got your nose. 476 00:29:19,400 --> 00:29:22,597 Yes, I do. Yes, I do. 477 00:29:24,933 --> 00:29:26,525 Oh, you got my nose. 478 00:29:26,700 --> 00:29:29,931 You got my nose. Yes, you do. 479 00:29:31,233 --> 00:29:34,031 He's got my nose. He's got my nose. He's hurting- 480 00:29:34,200 --> 00:29:35,565 Darryl, he's hurting me. 481 00:29:35,733 --> 00:29:38,224 - He's hurting me. - Okay, okay, okay. 482 00:29:38,400 --> 00:29:40,265 Wow, is he strong. 483 00:29:40,866 --> 00:29:43,334 Yeah, tell me about it. I still can't feel my hand. 484 00:29:43,500 --> 00:29:45,968 Okay, Darryl, I think you should take the crib upstairs. 485 00:29:46,133 --> 00:29:48,431 - Yes. - Ladies, will you help with this stuff? 486 00:29:48,599 --> 00:29:49,828 Okay. 487 00:29:50,000 --> 00:29:52,059 - Guys, help me grab this. - I'll get this box. 488 00:29:52,233 --> 00:29:54,428 Let's go into the kitchen. Come, Calvin. 489 00:29:54,599 --> 00:29:57,467 - Come on, baby. - Come on, little pumpkin-butt. 490 00:29:58,633 --> 00:30:00,760 Janet, this fits perfectly. 491 00:30:01,233 --> 00:30:02,632 - Thank you. - Let me see. 492 00:30:03,366 --> 00:30:05,163 I'm glad I kept it. 493 00:30:05,733 --> 00:30:08,531 Can't remember the last time I could wear horizontal stripes. 494 00:30:09,500 --> 00:30:12,401 But, you know, here I go again. How about you, woman of the hour? 495 00:30:12,566 --> 00:30:15,399 - Congratulations on the promotion. - Oh, thank you. 496 00:30:15,566 --> 00:30:17,932 It's awesome. Was Darryl so excited or what? 497 00:30:18,099 --> 00:30:22,264 No, actually. He was disappointed. 498 00:30:22,433 --> 00:30:24,663 Baby up-up. 499 00:30:27,099 --> 00:30:30,069 He thought I was going to tell him I was pregnant. 500 00:30:34,733 --> 00:30:36,724 Okay, right. 501 00:30:36,900 --> 00:30:38,663 Little Ms. Corporate-Climber pregnant? 502 00:30:38,833 --> 00:30:44,135 What? You guys. I want to have a baby at some point. 503 00:30:44,299 --> 00:30:47,997 You could schedule one between a conference call and a client meeting. 504 00:30:49,433 --> 00:30:53,096 Okay, you know, Darryl is the one that I'm really worried about. 505 00:30:53,266 --> 00:30:55,666 Are you kidding me? You're lucky he wants one at all. 506 00:30:55,833 --> 00:30:57,733 I had to promise Greg I'd give him these. 507 00:30:59,833 --> 00:31:03,269 Okay, now. Okay, easy, fella. 508 00:31:05,533 --> 00:31:09,902 This one's real grabby. He must have been breast-fed. 509 00:31:10,500 --> 00:31:12,365 Is the baby hungry? 510 00:31:12,833 --> 00:31:13,891 He should be nursed. 511 00:31:14,066 --> 00:31:16,057 Baby like nursey-nursey. 512 00:31:16,700 --> 00:31:18,998 Well, are you sure you should do that? 513 00:31:19,166 --> 00:31:21,794 Yeah. You don't have to be the birth mother to breast-feed. 514 00:31:22,566 --> 00:31:26,058 - Nursey-nursey? - You want to nursey? 515 00:31:28,500 --> 00:31:29,933 Okay. 516 00:31:34,000 --> 00:31:35,365 All right. 517 00:31:36,099 --> 00:31:39,831 - Drink up, precious. - This one's real wriggly, huh? 518 00:31:40,000 --> 00:31:43,094 Come on. Come on, now. Suck it. 519 00:31:43,266 --> 00:31:48,033 Latch- Oh, that is not okay. 520 00:31:49,933 --> 00:31:51,195 Let's get these kids home. 521 00:31:51,366 --> 00:31:54,062 I have to take Nicholas and Chrissy to Mommy and Me tomorrow. 522 00:31:54,233 --> 00:31:55,530 Oh, have fun. 523 00:31:55,700 --> 00:31:58,794 Don't worry about the nose. He's adorable. 524 00:31:58,966 --> 00:32:01,799 - Thanks for all the stuff. - Call if you need anything. 525 00:32:01,966 --> 00:32:03,433 - Bye, good night. - Good night. 526 00:32:03,599 --> 00:32:06,330 If you change your mind about Consuela, you can take her. 527 00:32:06,500 --> 00:32:08,559 - Oh, thanks. - I've got, like, all the chores. 528 00:32:08,733 --> 00:32:10,394 One for you... 529 00:32:11,733 --> 00:32:13,724 ...and one for the baby. 530 00:32:32,333 --> 00:32:34,130 He's a little charmer, isn't he? 531 00:32:34,333 --> 00:32:36,563 Call me. 532 00:32:38,733 --> 00:32:41,224 I could have sworn he iust stuck his tongue in my mouth. 533 00:32:49,433 --> 00:32:51,731 - Well, I- That was- I thought- - That went well. 534 00:32:51,900 --> 00:32:54,061 - Yeah. - I thought they thought he was cute. 535 00:32:54,233 --> 00:32:56,793 Great. You're wonder- Oh, Calvin, you did so good. 536 00:32:56,966 --> 00:32:59,025 - Come on. Yeah. - You did so well. 537 00:32:59,200 --> 00:33:02,135 If that lady touches you in a way that makes you uncomfortable... 538 00:33:02,299 --> 00:33:03,790 ...you let us know, okay? 539 00:33:03,966 --> 00:33:06,433 - Yeah. You're the charmer. - Yeah. 540 00:33:06,433 --> 00:33:10,563 Does that warm water feel good? Does it feel nice? 541 00:33:10,733 --> 00:33:12,928 Yeah. Look at you. 542 00:33:13,099 --> 00:33:16,729 Do you want some company in there with you? 543 00:33:16,900 --> 00:33:18,197 I think we can work that out. 544 00:33:18,766 --> 00:33:21,462 Yeah? Yeah? 545 00:33:21,633 --> 00:33:22,998 Hey, Darryl? 546 00:33:23,166 --> 00:33:26,226 Hello. It's bath time. 547 00:33:29,033 --> 00:33:31,058 Come on, let's get clean. 548 00:33:32,033 --> 00:33:34,968 We gonna clean your little butt-butt. Yes, we are. 549 00:33:35,133 --> 00:33:36,964 And then we gonna play Snatch the Marbles. 550 00:33:37,133 --> 00:33:38,566 We're gonna fart in the tub... 551 00:33:38,733 --> 00:33:41,861 ...and make our own little Jacuzzi bubbles. 552 00:33:47,033 --> 00:33:50,434 Oh, the little baby. Yes, you're so clean now. 553 00:33:50,599 --> 00:33:52,033 You're so nice and clean. 554 00:33:56,799 --> 00:33:59,667 Hey. Okay- Calvin. 555 00:33:59,833 --> 00:34:02,063 Okay, Calvin. 556 00:34:03,299 --> 00:34:04,767 Okay. Hey, Darryl? 557 00:34:04,933 --> 00:34:08,061 - All right, sweetie. - Hello, little boy. 558 00:34:08,233 --> 00:34:09,893 Hi, cutie. 559 00:34:10,065 --> 00:34:12,295 Now it's time to get you all dressed for bed, huh? 560 00:34:12,466 --> 00:34:15,264 Don't forget the doctor said we need to take his temperature. 561 00:34:15,433 --> 00:34:16,956 Okay. 562 00:34:17,166 --> 00:34:18,393 - Yeah. - All right. 563 00:34:18,565 --> 00:34:20,033 Open up wide. 564 00:34:20,199 --> 00:34:23,067 - Darryl, what are you doing? - I'm taking his temperature. 565 00:34:23,233 --> 00:34:26,760 Sweetie, he's a baby, so that's a rectal thermometer. 566 00:34:28,300 --> 00:34:29,597 Yeah. Go ahead. 567 00:34:29,766 --> 00:34:30,994 - You're such a- - Okay, baby. 568 00:34:31,166 --> 00:34:33,190 All right. Here we go. There we- 569 00:34:34,400 --> 00:34:36,163 - Oh, shit. - Darryl, what are you doing? 570 00:34:36,533 --> 00:34:39,228 Darryl, come on. Darryl, iust- 571 00:34:39,400 --> 00:34:41,697 - I'm trying to- - Honey. 572 00:34:41,866 --> 00:34:43,766 It's okay, Calvin. It's okay. 573 00:34:43,933 --> 00:34:46,197 - If he'll iust roll over here. - Okay, good, good. 574 00:34:46,366 --> 00:34:48,061 - I could get him down like- - No, no. 575 00:34:48,233 --> 00:34:51,565 - Wait, be gentle. Calvin, it's okay. - He's a little strong. 576 00:34:51,733 --> 00:34:54,896 Okay, all right. Nobody likes this, I know. 577 00:34:55,065 --> 00:34:57,557 I know, nobody- Nobody likes this. 578 00:34:57,733 --> 00:35:01,726 It's okay. It's okay. Oh, yeah. There we go, son. 579 00:35:01,900 --> 00:35:05,631 - Here comes the choo-choo train. - You're okay, baby. Oh, yeah. 580 00:35:11,333 --> 00:35:15,827 It's in the tunnel, son. It's almost at your stop. 581 00:35:20,466 --> 00:35:22,627 There you go, little man. 582 00:35:23,000 --> 00:35:26,800 Now, this is gonna put you to sleep. 583 00:35:27,766 --> 00:35:29,358 All right, little buddy. 584 00:35:35,833 --> 00:35:37,562 Good night, baby. 585 00:35:44,166 --> 00:35:47,101 Like this thing's gonna put somebody to sleep. 586 00:35:47,699 --> 00:35:49,668 I'm gonna wait for you to go to sleep. 587 00:35:49,833 --> 00:35:52,301 I'm gonna get my diamond and be out. 588 00:37:22,166 --> 00:37:26,159 Come on, baby, be in here. Come on. 589 00:37:27,766 --> 00:37:29,028 Come on. 590 00:37:29,199 --> 00:37:31,259 Come on, where you at? Where you at? 591 00:37:31,433 --> 00:37:32,991 There we go. 592 00:37:34,466 --> 00:37:38,869 Hi, beautiful. Yes. 593 00:37:54,400 --> 00:37:57,096 Man, this idiot better pick up the phone. 594 00:38:11,633 --> 00:38:14,033 People calling here all kind of time. 595 00:38:14,199 --> 00:38:18,034 Like people don't live here. I mean, you can't be calling nobody house... 596 00:38:18,833 --> 00:38:22,929 P- Unit Productions, in association with Go Get a Girl Entertainment. 597 00:38:23,099 --> 00:38:25,432 - Hey, yo, Percy. It's me. - Calvin? 598 00:38:25,599 --> 00:38:28,535 - What's going on? - I need you to come pick me up. 599 00:38:28,699 --> 00:38:31,567 - Now, look, I got the dia- - Reach for the sky. 600 00:38:33,066 --> 00:38:34,761 Who you talking to, sonny boy? 601 00:38:39,933 --> 00:38:42,595 Oh, don't give me that old... crap. 602 00:38:42,766 --> 00:38:44,097 Hand me that damn phone. 603 00:38:45,366 --> 00:38:47,129 - Who is this? - Me no speak no English. 604 00:38:47,300 --> 00:38:48,562 Wrong number. Sorry. 605 00:38:48,733 --> 00:38:51,395 Who the hell's "No speak the English"? Who the hell is this? 606 00:38:51,566 --> 00:38:53,329 - Say something. - What are you doing? 607 00:38:53,500 --> 00:38:55,798 I heard some noises, came downstairs... 608 00:38:55,966 --> 00:38:58,025 ...and caught this little hoodlum on the phone. 609 00:38:58,199 --> 00:39:00,725 - Must've looked for the safe. - We don't have a safe. 610 00:39:00,900 --> 00:39:03,664 - He didn't know that. - Dada. 611 00:39:04,666 --> 00:39:08,568 Pop, man. He's a baby. 612 00:39:08,733 --> 00:39:11,600 It's his first night in a new house. Probably couldn't sleep. 613 00:39:11,766 --> 00:39:15,827 Look at you. You look crazy, man. Holding a shotgun, wearing red socks. 614 00:39:16,000 --> 00:39:19,128 You look like Fred Sanford on crack. Put that away, man. Go to bed. 615 00:39:19,300 --> 00:39:21,530 Oh, you are good. 616 00:39:21,699 --> 00:39:23,565 You are real good. 617 00:39:23,733 --> 00:39:25,928 I'm gonna keep my eye on you. 618 00:39:26,366 --> 00:39:27,890 You gonna give me the finger? 619 00:39:28,066 --> 00:39:31,524 Where did you learn that, huh? BET videos _fter Dark? 620 00:39:34,400 --> 00:39:35,662 Him scary. 621 00:39:35,833 --> 00:39:37,528 There we go. 622 00:39:37,699 --> 00:39:40,863 Don't pay him any mind. He just a old, crazy man. 623 00:39:41,033 --> 00:39:44,594 I know iust what to fix you so you can have a good night's sleep. 624 00:39:58,633 --> 00:40:01,568 Go. Boy, you must have had a rough first night. 625 00:40:03,033 --> 00:40:05,092 That's because I'm new at this dad stuff. 626 00:40:05,266 --> 00:40:07,894 Give me a minute, I'll get it together. 627 00:40:11,666 --> 00:40:15,067 Man, can't imagine what kind of life you must have had. 628 00:40:15,900 --> 00:40:17,128 I'll tell you this: 629 00:40:17,300 --> 00:40:19,860 This weekend is gonna be the best weekend of your life. 630 00:40:20,033 --> 00:40:21,261 You know why? 631 00:40:21,433 --> 00:40:24,334 Because I'm gonna show you how great it is to have a dad... 632 00:40:24,500 --> 00:40:28,197 ...and you're gonna show me how great it is to be a dad. 633 00:40:29,300 --> 00:40:32,269 Vanessa don't think I can do it, but I know I got it in me. 634 00:40:32,433 --> 00:40:35,266 You know why? Because I would never abandon my child. 635 00:40:36,866 --> 00:40:40,097 Ever. I'll always be there for him. 636 00:40:40,466 --> 00:40:43,458 And there'll never be a time when my son can't come to me... 637 00:40:43,633 --> 00:40:45,999 ...and talk to me about anything in the world... 638 00:40:46,166 --> 00:40:50,102 ...over a nice, warm cup of milk. 639 00:40:59,733 --> 00:41:02,395 What's so funny? What are you all giggly for? 640 00:41:03,166 --> 00:41:05,191 You're drinking Janet's breast milk. 641 00:41:08,333 --> 00:41:12,702 Baby, you did the right thing, letting him stay with us this weekend. 642 00:41:13,166 --> 00:41:14,997 Thank you. 643 00:41:16,566 --> 00:41:21,435 But you know, I still can't wait for us to have one of our own. 644 00:41:22,833 --> 00:41:26,496 - Yes, I know. - All right. 645 00:41:27,599 --> 00:41:30,364 You wanna know the nice thing about you not being pregnant? 646 00:41:30,866 --> 00:41:32,390 What? 647 00:41:32,666 --> 00:41:34,725 We get to keep trying. 648 00:41:45,033 --> 00:41:48,093 Honey? What about the baby? 649 00:41:48,266 --> 00:41:51,064 He's asleep, don't worry about him. You've got me. 650 00:41:51,233 --> 00:41:53,030 But, honey... 651 00:41:55,000 --> 00:41:56,763 ...he's watching. 652 00:41:59,699 --> 00:42:02,828 He's too young to know what's going on. Forget him. 653 00:42:06,400 --> 00:42:07,799 Okay. 654 00:42:09,166 --> 00:42:10,861 Okay. 655 00:42:25,366 --> 00:42:26,924 Good morning. 656 00:42:28,633 --> 00:42:31,534 More like, great morning. 657 00:42:31,699 --> 00:42:35,101 Looks like someone had a really good night's sleep last night. 658 00:42:36,066 --> 00:42:37,693 Who could sleep? 659 00:42:37,866 --> 00:42:41,029 - You were an animal last night. - Oh, well, you know- 660 00:42:41,199 --> 00:42:45,000 I don't remember the last time we did it twice in one night. 661 00:42:45,166 --> 00:42:46,633 Twice? 662 00:42:49,233 --> 00:42:50,700 Hey, when did he get in the bed? 663 00:42:52,433 --> 00:42:55,766 I don't know. I don't know how he gets out of that crib. 664 00:42:55,933 --> 00:42:57,560 He's such a crafty little fella. 665 00:43:01,666 --> 00:43:03,827 You want some breakfast? 666 00:43:04,000 --> 00:43:05,433 Some more ass. 667 00:43:07,966 --> 00:43:09,331 Twice? 668 00:43:27,900 --> 00:43:31,028 - How's my baby girl this morning? - So good, Dad. 669 00:43:31,199 --> 00:43:33,600 - How are you? - Mighty fine, thank you. 670 00:43:33,766 --> 00:43:35,233 No, no, no. 671 00:43:35,400 --> 00:43:37,766 Thanks very much, Jim. And in other news... 672 00:43:37,933 --> 00:43:40,868 ...police have a suspect in yesterday's daring diamond heist. 673 00:43:41,033 --> 00:43:43,695 It is this man, Calvin "Baby Face" Sims... 674 00:43:43,866 --> 00:43:46,061 - ... who was released- - D. Rex, D. Rex, D. Rex. 675 00:43:46,233 --> 00:43:48,098 Stop that, whatever you're talking about. 676 00:43:48,266 --> 00:43:51,030 D. Rex, D. Rex, D. Rex. 677 00:43:51,199 --> 00:43:52,428 Just be quiet. 678 00:43:52,800 --> 00:43:54,427 - D. Rex. - Baby Face- 679 00:43:54,699 --> 00:43:57,760 Dad, let Calvin watch his show. 680 00:43:58,133 --> 00:44:01,534 You have to be the adult. Let Calvin watch his tape. 681 00:44:01,699 --> 00:44:04,601 - I wanna watch the news. - I don't care what you wanna watch. 682 00:44:04,766 --> 00:44:07,360 He was watching the TV first. 683 00:44:07,533 --> 00:44:09,000 I'll read the news. 684 00:44:09,166 --> 00:44:13,603 I tell you, the world is going to hell in a handcart. 685 00:44:49,800 --> 00:44:52,735 Wow, Dad, you really cleaned your plate. 686 00:44:52,900 --> 00:44:55,198 What? That hobgoblin ate my breakfast. 687 00:44:56,266 --> 00:44:58,257 Oh, Daddy, don't be ridiculous. 688 00:44:58,433 --> 00:45:01,561 I ain't being ridiculous. That little sucker ate my breakfast. 689 00:45:01,733 --> 00:45:05,260 I'm going to the diner, where I can eat and watch the news in peace. 690 00:45:05,533 --> 00:45:09,025 Okay, Dad. Be careful. 691 00:45:09,199 --> 00:45:13,034 Why don't we get you some food? You must be so hungry. 692 00:45:13,199 --> 00:45:15,668 It's time for you to eat something. 693 00:45:16,699 --> 00:45:19,191 - Morning, sweetie. - Oh, good morning, baby. 694 00:45:19,366 --> 00:45:20,663 Hello. 695 00:45:20,833 --> 00:45:23,825 - I have your breakfast right here. - Oh, goodie. 696 00:45:25,400 --> 00:45:29,097 Oh, sweetie, okay, now your dad is really tripping. 697 00:45:29,533 --> 00:45:33,025 Last night, I caught him holding little Calvin at gunpoint... 698 00:45:33,199 --> 00:45:35,691 ...because he heard him talking on the phone. 699 00:45:35,966 --> 00:45:37,763 That is- That's crazy. 700 00:45:38,066 --> 00:45:40,694 Well, you know... 701 00:45:40,866 --> 00:45:45,894 ...iust now he ate all of his breakfast, and then he told me the baby ate it. 702 00:45:47,099 --> 00:45:50,001 - Can you say, "Whispering Glen"? - No, Darryl. 703 00:45:50,166 --> 00:45:51,565 No nursing homes, okay? 704 00:45:51,733 --> 00:45:54,167 I don't wanna have this conversation with you again. 705 00:45:54,333 --> 00:45:57,029 I have to go to work, but the baby's food is here. 706 00:45:57,199 --> 00:45:59,327 - And I love you. - I love you too. 707 00:45:59,500 --> 00:46:02,867 Have a good day. Kiss. Feed him. 708 00:46:03,866 --> 00:46:05,595 All right. 709 00:46:07,833 --> 00:46:11,132 Okay, okay, let's get you all fed. 710 00:46:11,300 --> 00:46:16,397 All right. Open up wide. Here come the airplane. 711 00:46:22,400 --> 00:46:24,197 Oh, I see. 712 00:46:24,366 --> 00:46:26,527 You want to play a game of peekaboo, huh? 713 00:46:26,699 --> 00:46:28,691 Okay, okay, okay. 714 00:46:28,866 --> 00:46:30,493 Peekaboo, I see you. 715 00:46:33,733 --> 00:46:35,997 Peekaboo, I see you. 716 00:46:51,900 --> 00:46:55,063 You gotta be kidding me. God. 717 00:47:02,233 --> 00:47:03,825 Darryl? 718 00:47:05,066 --> 00:47:06,761 Where did I put it? 719 00:47:13,266 --> 00:47:15,427 Honey, I forgot my purse. 720 00:47:16,333 --> 00:47:18,324 Darryl. Darryl. 721 00:47:18,733 --> 00:47:22,100 Sweetheart. You can't just fall asleep like this. 722 00:47:22,566 --> 00:47:26,332 Oh, honey, I know that you're tired, but you have to watch the baby. 723 00:47:26,500 --> 00:47:29,560 You take your eyes off him for a minute, God knows what could happen. 724 00:47:29,733 --> 00:47:31,223 I was... 725 00:47:32,166 --> 00:47:34,657 - Darryl. - I was... 726 00:47:34,833 --> 00:47:36,698 - What...? - I don't- 727 00:47:36,866 --> 00:47:40,768 Honey, iust take him to the park or something, okay? 728 00:47:41,166 --> 00:47:42,497 Okay. 729 00:47:44,066 --> 00:47:45,397 What...? 730 00:47:53,066 --> 00:47:56,365 Peekaboo. Then I don't- What? 731 00:48:01,533 --> 00:48:04,161 We gonna play baseball. We gonna play football. 732 00:48:04,333 --> 00:48:07,234 And we're gonna play golf. 733 00:48:07,566 --> 00:48:10,467 And we're gonna shoot a plane. 734 00:48:10,633 --> 00:48:13,101 We're gonna have fun. 735 00:48:16,800 --> 00:48:18,461 There we go. 736 00:48:18,633 --> 00:48:22,069 All right, son. Now, don't be afraid to really swing that bat, okay? 737 00:48:22,233 --> 00:48:25,498 Now, the trick is to really keep your eye on the ball, okay? 738 00:48:25,666 --> 00:48:27,190 Here we go. 739 00:48:32,400 --> 00:48:35,028 Yeah, you want that sucker to really fly. 740 00:48:35,199 --> 00:48:37,327 You wanna give that thing a lot of air, okay? 741 00:48:37,500 --> 00:48:39,195 There you go. Give it some good pump. 742 00:48:39,366 --> 00:48:41,926 You want it to really fly. You want it to blast off. 743 00:48:42,099 --> 00:48:45,592 Yeah, there you go. No, no, no. You want to point that up. 744 00:48:45,766 --> 00:48:49,031 No. No, no, son. What are you-? No, no, no. Don't push that button. 745 00:48:52,333 --> 00:48:55,530 Okay, so now, what you wanna do is you wanna wind that baby up... 746 00:48:55,699 --> 00:48:57,725 ...and you throw it as hard as you can, okay? 747 00:48:57,900 --> 00:48:59,492 - Okay. - All right. Come on. 748 00:49:03,500 --> 00:49:05,934 Look at that. Yeah. 749 00:49:06,966 --> 00:49:09,764 Yeah. Look at that sucker. 750 00:49:12,266 --> 00:49:13,597 Where'd it go? 751 00:49:23,533 --> 00:49:25,330 The ducks teach you playfulness. 752 00:49:25,500 --> 00:49:28,196 Here, you can borrow this if you want. He'd love it. 753 00:49:28,366 --> 00:49:30,391 Hey, Dad-For-A-Weekend. 754 00:49:31,033 --> 00:49:32,261 How's it going? 755 00:49:32,433 --> 00:49:35,368 I think they designed all the toys to hit you in the nuts. 756 00:49:35,933 --> 00:49:37,332 Oh, yeah. 757 00:49:38,166 --> 00:49:39,155 Get off. 758 00:49:39,333 --> 00:49:42,496 Richard, I bet my son could kick the crap out of both your kids... 759 00:49:42,666 --> 00:49:45,328 ...blindfolded, one hand tied behind his back. 760 00:49:45,500 --> 00:49:48,958 Come on, Greg. Nicholas is a sweet, sensitive kid. 761 00:49:49,133 --> 00:49:51,158 He's not a fighter. 762 00:49:51,333 --> 00:49:54,359 I'm telling you, Darryl, see, you gotta be tough on kids nowadays. 763 00:49:54,533 --> 00:49:57,991 All right, the slightest bit of weakness and they could end up... 764 00:50:00,433 --> 00:50:01,866 ...like that. 765 00:50:02,033 --> 00:50:04,968 Well, I don't know about all that, but I gotta be honest with you. 766 00:50:05,133 --> 00:50:08,193 I'm starting to dig this father thing. It's kind of cool. 767 00:50:08,366 --> 00:50:12,097 It's kind of like I get to do all the things that I never did with my dad. 768 00:50:12,266 --> 00:50:14,097 - You know? - That's real cute. 769 00:50:14,633 --> 00:50:17,830 Really, I think I'm having a positive influence on him. 770 00:50:19,333 --> 00:50:21,733 Cee-lo, that's right. Dig up in your OshKosh... 771 00:50:21,900 --> 00:50:23,367 ...your babyGap and pay the man. 772 00:50:23,533 --> 00:50:26,730 - That's right. Yeah. - It's not fair. 773 00:50:26,900 --> 00:50:28,561 Come on, put your money in the pot. 774 00:50:28,733 --> 00:50:30,496 Whine to your mama, don't whine to me. 775 00:50:30,666 --> 00:50:31,997 Right, good game, good game. 776 00:50:32,166 --> 00:50:33,656 Come here, you guys. Come here. 777 00:50:35,199 --> 00:50:37,361 Yo, y'all bring your money tomorrow... 778 00:50:37,533 --> 00:50:40,400 ...I'm gonna sell y'all some pictures of some naked girls. 779 00:50:42,066 --> 00:50:44,728 What I say? Y'all don't like big breasts? 780 00:50:44,900 --> 00:50:46,527 Daddy, can I have some ice cream? 781 00:50:46,699 --> 00:50:48,099 Sure, sweetie. What flavor? 782 00:50:48,266 --> 00:50:49,858 - Vanilla. - You got it. 783 00:50:50,033 --> 00:50:51,500 - I think we'll go with you. - Okay. 784 00:50:52,733 --> 00:50:54,724 - You're getting big. - Janet, do me a favor? 785 00:50:55,900 --> 00:50:58,266 - Could you watch Calvin for me? - No problem. 786 00:50:59,333 --> 00:51:00,766 Calvin. 787 00:51:00,933 --> 00:51:02,195 Percy. 788 00:51:03,166 --> 00:51:06,602 - Cal, you get the diamond? - Yeah, it's in the diaper bag. Come on. 789 00:51:06,766 --> 00:51:07,926 Hold hands. 790 00:51:08,099 --> 00:51:10,625 Cal, which one is it? 791 00:51:11,066 --> 00:51:12,829 The one with the duck on it. 792 00:51:14,633 --> 00:51:18,262 - They all got ducks on them. - I think it's that one. 793 00:51:18,766 --> 00:51:20,427 Come on. 794 00:51:21,199 --> 00:51:23,225 Hey, that guy's not even here with a child. 795 00:51:23,400 --> 00:51:24,867 Hey. 796 00:51:26,199 --> 00:51:28,691 Hey, get away from him. Girls, let's get him! 797 00:51:28,866 --> 00:51:31,357 - I'm out. - There he is. 798 00:51:32,933 --> 00:51:35,163 Pumpkin, are you okay? 799 00:51:35,599 --> 00:51:37,227 - Did he touch you anywhere? - No. 800 00:51:37,400 --> 00:51:39,561 No? Okay. Good. 801 00:51:39,733 --> 00:51:41,928 - Hey, is everything okay, Janet? - It's not okay. 802 00:51:42,099 --> 00:51:44,762 Some sick pervert tried to run away with this little guy. 803 00:51:44,933 --> 00:51:46,867 Hey, that psycho took my diaper bag. 804 00:51:47,033 --> 00:51:49,092 - What? - Damn. 805 00:51:50,266 --> 00:51:51,927 Pervert. 806 00:51:53,433 --> 00:51:57,199 Okay, we gonna get you home where it's nice and safe, all right? 807 00:52:00,900 --> 00:52:03,596 Keys, keys. I want the keys. 808 00:52:03,833 --> 00:52:08,099 Keys, keys, I want keys. Keys. Keys. Keys. 809 00:52:08,266 --> 00:52:10,393 No, no, no. Daddy needs these to drive the- 810 00:52:10,566 --> 00:52:12,090 - Keys. - Oh, God. 811 00:52:12,266 --> 00:52:13,995 Keys. Give me the keys. 812 00:52:14,566 --> 00:52:17,160 - Oh, no. Here. Take that. - No. Keys. 813 00:52:17,333 --> 00:52:19,233 - I want keys. - Play with that for a while. 814 00:52:19,400 --> 00:52:21,732 - No, no, no. I need these. - I want keys. 815 00:52:22,599 --> 00:52:23,999 - Want keys. - Okay, here. 816 00:52:24,566 --> 00:52:27,194 - Keys. - All right, all right. 817 00:52:27,366 --> 00:52:31,302 All right, you wait right there, and I'll be right back, okay? 818 00:52:36,833 --> 00:52:38,494 Hey! 819 00:52:38,666 --> 00:52:40,099 My car. My kid. 820 00:52:41,400 --> 00:52:44,062 Hey, stop! 821 00:52:50,133 --> 00:52:52,158 Someone iust stole my car with my kid in it. 822 00:52:52,333 --> 00:52:53,595 Hop in. 823 00:52:54,666 --> 00:52:57,032 - Thank you. - Let's go get that son of a bitch. 824 00:53:07,433 --> 00:53:08,866 Damn. 825 00:53:20,900 --> 00:53:23,596 Man, my wife is gonna kill me when she finds out about this. 826 00:53:23,766 --> 00:53:25,597 My advice to you is don't tell her a word. 827 00:53:25,766 --> 00:53:27,597 I left Bobby Jr. at an amusement park. 828 00:53:27,766 --> 00:53:30,234 Told his father he was at summer camp. Bought me a week. 829 00:53:35,400 --> 00:53:38,460 Hello? I'm on my way. I'll be there in about five minutes. 830 00:53:38,633 --> 00:53:41,067 I have the cupcakes. Yes. 831 00:53:41,233 --> 00:53:43,064 I didn't bring iuice. You didn't tell me. 832 00:53:43,233 --> 00:53:45,827 - Don't talk to me that way. - Excuse me. 833 00:53:46,466 --> 00:53:48,093 - I'm hanging up. - Oh, my God. 834 00:53:48,266 --> 00:53:50,097 I'm hanging up. I'm hanging up. 835 00:53:51,733 --> 00:53:53,826 Watch the road, moron. 836 00:53:54,566 --> 00:53:56,898 Come on, baby. Let's go. Let's do this. 837 00:54:04,866 --> 00:54:08,267 Oh, wow, you are really upset. 838 00:54:08,433 --> 00:54:12,096 It makes me feel so good to know that there are people out there who care... 839 00:54:12,266 --> 00:54:14,359 - Mommy, Mommy... - ... about their kids- What? 840 00:54:14,533 --> 00:54:15,522 as I do. 841 00:54:15,699 --> 00:54:17,634 - Mommy, Mommy. - Just one second, honey. 842 00:54:17,800 --> 00:54:20,826 I'm fixing my makeup. 843 00:54:21,000 --> 00:54:23,161 - Mom. - What? 844 00:54:23,333 --> 00:54:25,563 I think Dillon did a doodie. 845 00:54:25,733 --> 00:54:28,429 - Mom, hurry up. Come on, hurry. - Change him. 846 00:54:28,599 --> 00:54:31,535 Oh, wait, no. Wait. 847 00:54:33,000 --> 00:54:35,696 Oh, my God. Excuse me. A truck. 848 00:54:35,900 --> 00:54:38,232 Excuse me. A truck. 849 00:54:38,400 --> 00:54:40,368 There you go. Can you hand me the powder? 850 00:54:40,533 --> 00:54:42,023 What? No, stop. 851 00:54:43,066 --> 00:54:44,658 We're gonna die. 852 00:54:51,500 --> 00:54:53,525 Oh, my God. 853 00:54:53,699 --> 00:54:55,895 Don't worry. You'll get your little boy back. 854 00:54:56,066 --> 00:54:58,933 It ain't worth it. Let me out. 855 00:55:05,433 --> 00:55:06,695 Oh, no. 856 00:55:22,833 --> 00:55:25,927 - Suspect got away. - Damn it! 857 00:55:26,833 --> 00:55:31,327 - But the kid's okay. - I want my daddy. 858 00:55:32,699 --> 00:55:36,898 I want Daddy. I want my daddy. 859 00:55:37,066 --> 00:55:38,966 Thanks for everything. 860 00:55:40,666 --> 00:55:42,759 Oh, by the way, I run a carpool... 861 00:55:42,933 --> 00:55:45,925 ...if the little one ever needs a ride to preschool. 862 00:55:46,166 --> 00:55:47,929 - Daddy. - That's my kid. 863 00:55:48,199 --> 00:55:50,395 Daddy. Daddy. 864 00:55:50,566 --> 00:55:54,002 - Are you okay, huh? - Daddy. 865 00:55:54,300 --> 00:55:58,566 - Son's okay, but car's totaled. - Screw the car. Long as he's okay. 866 00:55:58,733 --> 00:56:01,668 I'm sorry, man. I'm sorry, little buddy. 867 00:56:01,833 --> 00:56:04,427 I would never want anything to happen to you. 868 00:56:04,599 --> 00:56:06,465 I love you, man. 869 00:56:09,233 --> 00:56:10,825 - Mr. W. - Yeah. 870 00:56:11,000 --> 00:56:13,935 Your boy came through. I got it. 871 00:56:16,233 --> 00:56:18,724 Bring it to me. Watch my drink, babe. 872 00:56:34,099 --> 00:56:38,059 Keep looking. Keep digging in there. It's in there. It's in there, baby. 873 00:56:39,066 --> 00:56:40,931 Look around in there. 874 00:56:41,966 --> 00:56:44,696 Mr. Dub, could you dig deeper in there? 875 00:56:44,866 --> 00:56:46,163 Damn. 876 00:56:48,300 --> 00:56:50,063 Is that a dirty diaper? 877 00:56:51,333 --> 00:56:54,700 - Did I iust touch a dirty diaper? - Wait a minute. 878 00:56:54,866 --> 00:56:57,130 Whoa, that baby had lasagna last night. 879 00:56:57,300 --> 00:56:59,734 I know it's in here. The diamond's in here. 880 00:56:59,900 --> 00:57:03,666 - He said the diamond's in there. - Your 24 hours are up, Percy. 881 00:57:08,300 --> 00:57:10,325 And you haven't delivered my diamond. 882 00:57:10,500 --> 00:57:12,661 Do you know how that makes me feel? 883 00:57:13,933 --> 00:57:17,266 Please, Mr. Dub, give me a little more time. I promise I'll get the rock. 884 00:57:17,433 --> 00:57:19,993 It makes me feel like wanting to hurt you very badly. 885 00:57:20,533 --> 00:57:22,330 But I won't. 886 00:57:22,933 --> 00:57:26,061 Because that diamond means more to me than your life. 887 00:57:26,400 --> 00:57:28,664 Now, you get out of here and find me that diamond. 888 00:57:31,699 --> 00:57:35,295 - Get out of here. - I promise you, okay? I got you. 889 00:57:36,633 --> 00:57:39,067 Follow him. Find his partner. 890 00:57:39,233 --> 00:57:42,760 Get me my diamond, then stick them both in the ground. 891 00:57:43,366 --> 00:57:45,493 Aren't you taking this a bit far? 892 00:57:45,666 --> 00:57:48,191 I didn't even know they made a LoJack for kids. 893 00:57:48,366 --> 00:57:51,995 No, I'm telling you, I'm not taking any chances. This guy's tricky. 894 00:57:52,166 --> 00:57:53,531 Maybe I should skip the game. 895 00:57:53,699 --> 00:57:57,761 Are you crazy? They're playing Detroit, D. 896 00:57:58,333 --> 00:58:02,201 Why don't we pack up the little ugly son of a bitch and take him with us? 897 00:58:05,199 --> 00:58:07,065 You really think that's the best idea? 898 00:58:07,233 --> 00:58:09,565 Yeah, Richard, I do think it's the best idea. 899 00:58:09,733 --> 00:58:12,065 It's never too early to become a Chicago fan. 900 00:58:14,000 --> 00:58:17,265 - You know what, I'm in. - Yeah. Come on, let's go. 901 00:58:17,433 --> 00:58:20,994 Okay, but when the ladies ask, I was the one that said no. 902 00:58:21,166 --> 00:58:22,394 I- No. 903 00:58:28,766 --> 00:58:31,234 Are you ready to see how exciting a hockey game is? 904 00:58:31,400 --> 00:58:32,697 It's like boxing on ice. 905 00:58:32,866 --> 00:58:35,357 Five rows up behind the penalty box. Who the man? 906 00:58:35,533 --> 00:58:37,023 - Yeah, boy. Yeah. - That's right. 907 00:58:41,733 --> 00:58:44,497 Let's go. Come on. Come on. 908 00:58:45,166 --> 00:58:48,101 - Go, go, go. - Come on, what are you watching? 909 00:58:50,800 --> 00:58:52,563 Did you see that play? Hey. 910 00:58:52,733 --> 00:58:54,826 What you got in your mouth there, little fella? 911 00:58:55,533 --> 00:58:58,900 What you got in your mouth? Open up. Open. Let me see. 912 00:58:59,633 --> 00:59:01,567 Oh, okay, it was nothing. 913 00:59:01,733 --> 00:59:03,667 Come on. 914 00:59:05,966 --> 00:59:06,955 T Man! 915 00:59:07,133 --> 00:59:09,101 - Come on. - Here we go. 916 00:59:09,699 --> 00:59:10,962 Yeah. 917 00:59:13,599 --> 00:59:15,158 Yeah. 918 00:59:19,300 --> 00:59:21,894 - All right, who needs drinks? - I'm good. 919 00:59:22,066 --> 00:59:27,766 Oh, wait. Yeah, I guess I need another one, please. 920 00:59:29,500 --> 00:59:30,728 - Thanks. - Thanks. 921 00:59:30,966 --> 00:59:33,457 How about you guys? Anything to drink? 922 00:59:33,633 --> 00:59:36,431 - Yeah, I'll grab a beer, sure. - Me too, me too. Get me one. 923 00:59:37,099 --> 00:59:39,591 - There you go. - Thank you. 924 00:59:39,766 --> 00:59:43,293 - Okay. Here you go. - Nice ass. 925 00:59:46,066 --> 00:59:47,431 Pig. 926 00:59:48,599 --> 00:59:50,329 Tramp. 927 01:00:01,166 --> 01:00:04,602 What the hell was that for? 928 01:00:05,133 --> 01:00:06,998 - What did I do? - You know her? 929 01:00:07,166 --> 01:00:08,599 No, I don't know her. 930 01:00:09,866 --> 01:00:11,163 I don't know- I don't. 931 01:00:11,333 --> 01:00:13,028 - Hey, man. Get your own. - Hey. 932 01:00:13,333 --> 01:00:14,925 - What? - Beer. It's empty. 933 01:00:15,099 --> 01:00:17,500 - So get another one. - I'm gonna- 934 01:00:17,666 --> 01:00:19,759 - Get off. Wait. - What's your problem, man? 935 01:00:20,833 --> 01:00:23,165 - Come on, man. Come on, Miller. - Miller. 936 01:00:26,199 --> 01:00:28,168 You suck. 937 01:00:30,366 --> 01:00:33,563 - You suck, man. You suck. - Shut it, you losers! 938 01:00:33,733 --> 01:00:36,702 Want some of me? Come down here. Come play with the big boys. 939 01:00:36,866 --> 01:00:40,097 - You're a bully. You're a bully, man. - Yeah, I thought so, you princess. 940 01:00:40,266 --> 01:00:43,064 - Come on, you. - Pick on somebody your own size. 941 01:00:43,233 --> 01:00:45,224 Come on down here, then. 942 01:00:48,833 --> 01:00:50,528 Who did that? 943 01:00:53,199 --> 01:00:55,862 You. You're dead! 944 01:00:58,766 --> 01:01:00,233 He's gonna kill me. 945 01:01:01,433 --> 01:01:04,197 - Get out of my way. - It wasn't me. It was the baby. 946 01:01:04,366 --> 01:01:05,833 - You're mine. - Get him. 947 01:01:06,000 --> 01:01:07,433 Hockey fight! 948 01:01:13,733 --> 01:01:16,759 He's got my ear. Get this baby off of me. 949 01:01:21,266 --> 01:01:25,168 - Hey. Hey, hey. - Is that all you got? 950 01:01:29,300 --> 01:01:30,767 I don't know, baby. 951 01:01:30,933 --> 01:01:33,800 Maybe you're right. Maybe I'm not ready to be a dad yet. 952 01:01:33,966 --> 01:01:36,628 It really wasn't your fault. 953 01:01:36,933 --> 01:01:38,992 It's so funny, man. It just happened so fast. 954 01:01:39,166 --> 01:01:41,031 I took my eyes off him for one second and: 955 01:01:41,199 --> 01:01:43,259 He would've never had another birthday again. 956 01:01:45,599 --> 01:01:48,535 Hey. Why don't we do that? 957 01:01:48,699 --> 01:01:50,429 Why don't we throw him a birthday party? 958 01:01:50,599 --> 01:01:53,068 Well, we don't know when his birthday is. 959 01:01:53,233 --> 01:01:54,860 So what? We'll celebrate it tomorrow. 960 01:01:55,033 --> 01:01:58,560 We'll throw him a big birthday bash. The biggest birthday party he ever had. 961 01:01:58,733 --> 01:02:00,701 That is a really good idea. 962 01:02:01,066 --> 01:02:05,002 And I got a little surprise for him. 963 01:02:05,166 --> 01:02:07,225 Does everyone know what time it is? 964 01:02:07,400 --> 01:02:12,235 It's time to dance and sing, and have lots and lots of fun. 965 01:02:12,400 --> 01:02:15,062 Hey there, boys and girls, it's Dinosaur Rex... 966 01:02:15,233 --> 01:02:17,258 ...your favorite prehistoric pal. 967 01:02:17,433 --> 01:02:19,526 Now, where's the birthday boy? 968 01:02:19,699 --> 01:02:21,224 - There. - Yo, no, no. 969 01:02:21,466 --> 01:02:23,593 - Happy birthday. - Hey, yo. 970 01:02:23,766 --> 01:02:25,063 Happy birthday, little buddy 971 01:02:25,233 --> 01:02:26,427 I got a nasty hangover... 972 01:02:26,599 --> 01:02:28,363 ...and a rock stuck in my gut... 973 01:02:28,533 --> 01:02:30,933 ...that got my colon backed up like rush-hour traffic. 974 01:02:31,099 --> 01:02:33,694 Now, either you're gonna stop with your fruity kid songs... 975 01:02:33,866 --> 01:02:36,232 ...or I'm gonna kick you right in your furry balls. 976 01:02:36,766 --> 01:02:38,700 - All right? - Well... 977 01:02:38,866 --> 01:02:41,061 ...maybe we should talk about manners. 978 01:02:41,233 --> 01:02:43,167 Now, manners are very important. 979 01:02:43,333 --> 01:02:47,269 When I was a tiny lizard, my mom told me that if I had good manners... 980 01:02:47,433 --> 01:02:52,097 ...one day I could grow up to be president of the whole United States. 981 01:02:52,266 --> 01:02:54,632 But instead, you entertain snotty-nosed kids... 982 01:02:54,800 --> 01:02:56,461 ...in a crusty, blue dinosaur suit... 983 01:02:56,633 --> 01:02:59,966 ...that smell like sweaty armpits and baby urine. 984 01:03:01,233 --> 01:03:02,700 Far cry from president, buddy. 985 01:03:06,699 --> 01:03:08,861 I iust got out of rehab. 986 01:03:09,033 --> 01:03:11,194 Because of the new "deadbeat dad" law... 987 01:03:11,366 --> 01:03:15,325 ...my wife's garnishing 85 percent of my dinosaur wages. 988 01:03:15,500 --> 01:03:19,402 So if I weren't afraid to lose this iob, I'd kick your ass. 989 01:03:19,566 --> 01:03:22,831 Oh, you so pathetic you need $4.50 an hour that bad? 990 01:03:23,000 --> 01:03:24,831 Come on, get your ass kicked. 991 01:03:28,833 --> 01:03:30,926 - Bring it on. - Come on. Come on, then. 992 01:03:32,000 --> 01:03:35,094 - Hey. - Oh, you mine now. You mine. 993 01:03:36,833 --> 01:03:39,199 Get him, get him, get him. 994 01:03:42,533 --> 01:03:44,194 You little bastard. 995 01:03:46,766 --> 01:03:49,098 That was a cheap shot. 996 01:03:51,099 --> 01:03:54,433 - You stink. - I hate your show. 997 01:03:54,599 --> 01:03:57,262 It has been confirmed, the driver of the stolen vehicle... 998 01:03:57,433 --> 01:04:00,960 ...matches the description of the suspect in Friday's diamond heist. 999 01:04:01,133 --> 01:04:03,499 - Police are looking to question... - I knew it. 1000 01:04:03,666 --> 01:04:05,156 ...Calvin "Baby Face" Sims. 1001 01:04:05,333 --> 01:04:08,734 Sims, who was recently released from state prison, has thus far eluded- 1002 01:04:08,900 --> 01:04:11,095 Hey, guys, what do you say we liven this party up? 1003 01:04:11,266 --> 01:04:13,097 We have a little father-son football game. 1004 01:04:13,266 --> 01:04:16,258 Football? Greg, I don't know. I don't think that's a good idea. 1005 01:04:16,433 --> 01:04:19,163 Nicholas is a little young and small for football. 1006 01:04:19,333 --> 01:04:21,858 How about Simon Says instead? 1007 01:04:22,099 --> 01:04:24,864 You know, Richard, your son practically squats to pee. 1008 01:04:25,433 --> 01:04:28,197 Come on, man. Look, we gotta scar these kids for life. 1009 01:04:28,366 --> 01:04:30,197 All right? We gotta toughen them up a bit. 1010 01:04:30,366 --> 01:04:31,765 You don't- 1011 01:04:32,400 --> 01:04:33,389 - Come on. - Come on. 1012 01:04:33,566 --> 01:04:35,830 Darryl, you in, or does Calvin have ballet class? 1013 01:04:36,000 --> 01:04:37,092 I'm down. 1014 01:04:37,566 --> 01:04:39,227 - All right. - All right, let's do it. 1015 01:04:42,199 --> 01:04:45,169 Football? That's not in the books. I've read all the books. 1016 01:04:45,333 --> 01:04:47,858 Yeah, you're wetting yourself here. Go play football. 1017 01:04:48,033 --> 01:04:49,660 - You sure? - Rich, let's go. 1018 01:04:49,833 --> 01:04:53,496 - It's 7-O already. - All right. I'm playing football. 1019 01:04:53,666 --> 01:04:55,725 Take off the sli- Oh, my God. 1020 01:04:55,900 --> 01:04:58,130 Whoa, here we go. 1021 01:04:58,300 --> 01:05:01,394 P- U-T-I-T-I-N Put it in 1022 01:05:01,599 --> 01:05:04,763 P- U-T-I-T-I-N Put it in 1023 01:05:06,133 --> 01:05:09,728 You and me, this is father-son stuff. Right here, huh? Here we go. 1024 01:05:09,900 --> 01:05:13,358 - Ready, set... - I love you, baby. 1025 01:05:13,533 --> 01:05:15,194 Hike. 1026 01:05:15,366 --> 01:05:17,425 One Victoria's Secret. Two- 1027 01:05:18,599 --> 01:05:20,158 - Oh, God. - Yeah. 1028 01:05:20,333 --> 01:05:22,699 You want the hospital or the graveyard, punk? 1029 01:05:23,199 --> 01:05:24,360 Yeah. 1030 01:05:24,533 --> 01:05:26,330 - Here we go. - Are you okay? 1031 01:05:26,500 --> 01:05:29,333 - I thought this was a touch game. - You have his license number? 1032 01:05:29,500 --> 01:05:31,900 - What is he doing? - Sorry, D, did I hurt your vagina? 1033 01:05:32,066 --> 01:05:35,968 Our team is what? Dynamite Our team is what? Dynamite 1034 01:05:36,133 --> 01:05:37,930 - What's going on? - Our team is 1035 01:05:39,133 --> 01:05:40,157 Dynamite 1036 01:05:40,333 --> 01:05:41,493 Break. 1037 01:05:43,866 --> 01:05:45,663 Run, Dad. 1038 01:05:48,833 --> 01:05:50,494 Nicholas, are you okay? 1039 01:05:50,666 --> 01:05:52,531 Game on. 1040 01:05:52,733 --> 01:05:56,032 - Just stay down, son. - Thattaboy. You did it. 1041 01:05:56,633 --> 01:05:59,397 Now, that's why we put creatine in our corn flakes. 1042 01:06:00,033 --> 01:06:02,331 - You okay? - Punch him, kick him 1043 01:06:02,500 --> 01:06:04,934 Stick him in the eye 1044 01:06:06,433 --> 01:06:08,424 Here we go, here we go. 1045 01:06:08,599 --> 01:06:10,727 All right, here we go. Come on, boys. 1046 01:06:16,566 --> 01:06:19,694 - Yeah. - Your husband is a brute. 1047 01:06:19,866 --> 01:06:21,493 - That's right. - Yo, Greg, man. 1048 01:06:21,666 --> 01:06:23,327 You should be ashamed of yourself! 1049 01:06:23,500 --> 01:06:25,900 Hey, what are you doing, Greg? Man, he's a kid. 1050 01:06:26,066 --> 01:06:28,864 Hey, Darryl, Darryl. Shut your pie-hole, man! 1051 01:06:29,033 --> 01:06:31,763 - It's football. It's football. - I know. 1052 01:06:31,933 --> 01:06:34,333 - Stop acting like a bitch. - Why you starting, man? 1053 01:06:34,500 --> 01:06:37,731 Come on, let's go. Man, come on. You guys suck. 1054 01:06:38,133 --> 01:06:40,260 It's time to kick some butt. Come on. 1055 01:06:41,000 --> 01:06:45,369 Ready, set, hike. 1056 01:06:47,800 --> 01:06:50,530 - I got him. - Nicholas, block left. Come on. 1057 01:06:53,366 --> 01:06:55,766 - Tommy. - How do you like them apples? 1058 01:06:55,933 --> 01:06:58,731 - Get him. - Yeah, come on. 1059 01:06:59,866 --> 01:07:03,063 - Yeah. - Yes. Yes. 1060 01:07:06,666 --> 01:07:10,534 Tommy, what's going on? You call that a tackle? 1061 01:07:11,000 --> 01:07:12,695 Told you, you gotta stay in the zone. 1062 01:07:12,866 --> 01:07:15,426 You gotta eat some lightning and crap thunder, son. 1063 01:07:15,599 --> 01:07:18,364 You wanna get up? Come on. Come on. Come on. 1064 01:07:19,666 --> 01:07:23,830 - Come on. Come on, man. - Shut up, Darryl. It's my son. 1065 01:07:24,699 --> 01:07:29,330 All right, it's do-or-die time. Last point wins. 1066 01:07:30,199 --> 01:07:32,668 Nicholas, you ready? 1067 01:07:33,766 --> 01:07:37,702 Purple Haze. Purple Haze 15. 1068 01:07:38,033 --> 01:07:42,231 Ready, set, hike. 1069 01:07:43,433 --> 01:07:44,661 Follow me. 1070 01:07:46,766 --> 01:07:48,859 - Go, Nicholas. Go, Nicholas. - Come on, come on. 1071 01:07:49,833 --> 01:07:51,391 - Bring it on. - Go. Go. 1072 01:07:53,933 --> 01:07:56,265 - Go. Oh, my goodness. - Come on, get up. 1073 01:07:57,433 --> 01:07:59,424 Go, Nicholas. Go, Nicholas. Go, Nicholas. 1074 01:07:59,599 --> 01:08:02,160 - Come on. - Tommy, hurry. 1075 01:08:02,333 --> 01:08:05,700 This team is dynamite We're dynamite 1076 01:08:06,933 --> 01:08:10,801 - That's my son. - That is my boy. That is my boy. 1077 01:08:10,966 --> 01:08:13,901 You did it, son. You crapped thunder. 1078 01:08:14,066 --> 01:08:16,694 Nine months inside. Yes. 1079 01:08:17,265 --> 01:08:18,698 Dad, Dad. 1080 01:08:19,399 --> 01:08:22,595 - Yeah, son? - You suck. 1081 01:08:23,198 --> 01:08:24,997 Son, Dad hurt his pee-pee. 1082 01:08:25,166 --> 01:08:26,861 - Get up, you pussy. - I can't. 1083 01:08:31,033 --> 01:08:34,024 All right, everybody, here she comes. Everybody, on three. 1084 01:08:34,366 --> 01:08:36,765 One, two, three. 1085 01:08:41,633 --> 01:08:43,328 They trying to punk me. 1086 01:08:45,466 --> 01:08:48,492 All these people trying to make a fool out of me. 1087 01:08:48,666 --> 01:08:50,224 Trying to make me cry. 1088 01:08:50,500 --> 01:08:55,493 I didn't cry when I went to prison, and I ain't gonna cry now. 1089 01:08:55,666 --> 01:09:00,433 I don't care if I never had a mother who threw me a party. 1090 01:09:01,100 --> 01:09:06,127 Today is my birthday and I'm gonna smile, damn it. 1091 01:09:09,933 --> 01:09:11,627 I wish I had a family. 1092 01:09:11,800 --> 01:09:15,759 Well done, baby. What is this, Dad? 1093 01:09:15,933 --> 01:09:18,902 I got a gift for the kid. I know I've been a little tough on him. 1094 01:09:19,066 --> 01:09:22,058 But it ain't easy when I've been the center of all the attention... 1095 01:09:22,233 --> 01:09:24,724 ...and all of a sudden, a kid walk in the house. A baby. 1096 01:09:24,899 --> 01:09:28,358 I want you to know now, from now on, I'm here to help. 1097 01:09:29,066 --> 01:09:32,627 Now, Calvin, make a wish. 1098 01:09:32,800 --> 01:09:37,930 And I hope all of your wishes come true. 1099 01:09:49,765 --> 01:09:51,323 Oh, great, you're here. 1100 01:09:51,566 --> 01:09:53,932 The bouncy's in the back. Just go around the side. 1101 01:09:54,100 --> 01:09:55,567 No, I'm here to get my son. 1102 01:09:57,166 --> 01:09:58,861 Little dude. Little man. 1103 01:09:59,166 --> 01:10:00,793 - Son? - That's right. 1104 01:10:00,966 --> 01:10:04,026 I didn't think I could do it, but I got myself together, baby. 1105 01:10:04,199 --> 01:10:07,363 So if you iust give me the boy, we're gonna slide out of here. 1106 01:10:07,533 --> 01:10:11,196 So you're the guy who left his baby on my doorstep... 1107 01:10:11,366 --> 01:10:14,199 - ... in a dog basket? - That's right, but that was a mistake. 1108 01:10:14,366 --> 01:10:16,197 The guy who gave his own kid a tattoo? 1109 01:10:16,366 --> 01:10:18,891 Wait. I can explain that. His mother was in the service. 1110 01:10:19,066 --> 01:10:22,797 The person responsible for allowing his baby boy to take a knife in the gut? 1111 01:10:22,966 --> 01:10:24,593 Wait. The boy needed discipline. 1112 01:10:24,766 --> 01:10:26,358 - You should be castrated. - What? 1113 01:10:26,533 --> 01:10:28,398 Ain't nothing wrong with my bowel movement. 1114 01:10:28,566 --> 01:10:31,194 I go two, three times a day. Let me tell you something. 1115 01:10:31,366 --> 01:10:33,357 I ain't got to explain nothing. I'm a grown- 1116 01:10:33,533 --> 01:10:36,832 You iust caught yourself the official Brooklyn beat-down, homes. 1117 01:10:37,000 --> 01:10:39,161 You iust entered the dragon, homeboy. 1118 01:10:39,333 --> 01:10:41,631 Word up. I'm gonna tap you right on your Flintstone. 1119 01:10:41,800 --> 01:10:44,530 Here it come, homeboy. Here it come, homeboy. Here it- 1120 01:10:49,166 --> 01:10:50,861 Who is Mike Jones? 1121 01:10:52,666 --> 01:10:54,725 Get the hell out of here. And don't come back. 1122 01:10:57,699 --> 01:10:59,634 I want my mother. 1123 01:11:00,600 --> 01:11:04,229 Looks like Percy's partner decided to keep the rock for himself. 1124 01:11:04,399 --> 01:11:07,267 - Better go tell Mr. Walken. - Yeah. 1125 01:11:07,533 --> 01:11:11,401 There you go. Good. 1126 01:11:12,066 --> 01:11:13,533 - Come on. - Honestly, Janet... 1127 01:11:13,699 --> 01:11:15,099 ...I don't know how you do it. 1128 01:11:15,266 --> 01:11:17,427 - What's that, sweetie? - All of this. 1129 01:11:17,600 --> 01:11:19,830 The parenting, the responsibility. 1130 01:11:20,000 --> 01:11:22,298 It's really no different than any other career. 1131 01:11:23,000 --> 01:11:26,265 I mean, you have scheduling, you have planning. Budgeting, of course. 1132 01:11:26,433 --> 01:11:29,061 I guess the big difference is that my boss... 1133 01:11:29,233 --> 01:11:31,394 ...I want to slather in kisses all day long. 1134 01:11:31,766 --> 01:11:34,758 And I can, without being sued for sexual harassment. 1135 01:11:36,566 --> 01:11:38,761 And you don't miss the iob at all? 1136 01:11:38,933 --> 01:11:41,766 You know, sometimes I think I miss it... 1137 01:11:41,933 --> 01:11:44,401 ...but then I remember all they really liked about me... 1138 01:11:44,566 --> 01:11:46,397 ...was the money that I made for them. 1139 01:11:46,899 --> 01:11:51,803 You know? I mean, this... This is real. These guys dig me. 1140 01:11:51,966 --> 01:11:56,062 I am a diva, a giant, a goddess. 1141 01:11:56,233 --> 01:11:58,701 I'm perfect. Aren't I perfect? 1142 01:12:01,366 --> 01:12:03,391 Mommy, I don't feel good. 1143 01:12:03,566 --> 01:12:05,864 What's the matter, honey? You got a tummy ache? 1144 01:12:06,033 --> 01:12:09,594 Yeah? Think maybe it's from eating 16 pieces of cake... 1145 01:12:09,766 --> 01:12:11,290 ...and beef ierky... 1146 01:12:11,466 --> 01:12:13,730 ...and a balloon? Yeah. 1147 01:12:15,466 --> 01:12:19,368 - Is he gonna be okay? - Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. 1148 01:12:19,533 --> 01:12:21,023 Just a little teaspoon of this- 1149 01:12:21,199 --> 01:12:22,428 It is magic. 1150 01:12:22,600 --> 01:12:26,400 and he will poop very shortly. 1151 01:12:27,033 --> 01:12:28,694 It'll slide right out. 1152 01:12:30,699 --> 01:12:31,758 Good boy. 1153 01:12:32,166 --> 01:12:34,100 Well, maybe you should take him home. 1154 01:12:34,266 --> 01:12:35,893 Yes, maybe we shall. 1155 01:12:36,066 --> 01:12:39,035 - You wanna go home? - And you too. Yeah. 1156 01:12:40,366 --> 01:12:42,561 Oh, goodness, what do you feed this kid? 1157 01:12:42,733 --> 01:12:44,166 What do I feed you? 1158 01:12:44,333 --> 01:12:46,267 - All right. I'll see you soon? - Okay. 1159 01:12:46,433 --> 01:12:48,230 - Thank you. - See you later. Come on, hon. 1160 01:12:48,399 --> 01:12:51,631 Such a good boy, helping your mom. 1161 01:13:13,800 --> 01:13:16,360 Oh, sweetie. Wha-? 1162 01:13:16,699 --> 01:13:20,431 Oh, honey, what's wrong? Sweetie? 1163 01:13:20,600 --> 01:13:23,694 - Hey, little man, what's the matter? - I don't think he's feeling well. 1164 01:13:23,866 --> 01:13:25,663 Are you okay? 1165 01:13:29,000 --> 01:13:31,628 What's the matter, you gotta make a poo-poos? 1166 01:13:32,966 --> 01:13:36,402 You gotta make a poo-poo. He gotta make a little poo-poo, yeah. 1167 01:13:39,300 --> 01:13:40,699 God. 1168 01:13:41,266 --> 01:13:43,427 What's going on, man, huh? 1169 01:13:57,366 --> 01:14:00,392 Ain't that cute. He made a little surprise... 1170 01:14:00,566 --> 01:14:01,965 ...for Mommy. 1171 01:14:02,133 --> 01:14:03,395 - Mom-? For me? - Go ahead. 1172 01:14:03,566 --> 01:14:06,763 - Mommy take care. - Darryl, why me? I did it last time. 1173 01:14:06,933 --> 01:14:08,833 Wash your hands before you make dinner. 1174 01:14:09,000 --> 01:14:10,797 Come on, Calvin. 1175 01:14:11,600 --> 01:14:12,726 Come on. 1176 01:14:20,500 --> 01:14:22,434 Man, what a day. 1177 01:14:24,566 --> 01:14:27,126 - I can't believe you did this. - Did what? 1178 01:14:27,300 --> 01:14:30,701 - This. Darryl, it's so beautiful. - I did- I- 1179 01:14:30,866 --> 01:14:33,198 It's so romantic, the way you put it in his diaper. 1180 01:14:33,366 --> 01:14:36,494 Then you made me change him even though I didn't want to. Oh, so- 1181 01:14:37,233 --> 01:14:39,428 - No, but, honey- - We should go out and celebrate. 1182 01:14:39,600 --> 01:14:41,227 - Somewhere nice? I'll change. - Wait. 1183 01:14:41,399 --> 01:14:43,925 Thank you, baby. I love it, I love it, I love it. 1184 01:14:44,100 --> 01:14:47,365 - I love it, I love it, I love it. - I gotta talk to you. 1185 01:14:47,533 --> 01:14:49,364 - Baby, come here. - Damn. 1186 01:14:52,699 --> 01:14:54,429 Are you sure you guys are gonna be okay? 1187 01:14:54,600 --> 01:14:58,559 - We'll be fine, won't we, little boy? - I love Papa. 1188 01:14:58,733 --> 01:15:00,360 - All right. Bye. - Okay. 1189 01:15:00,533 --> 01:15:02,763 Y'all have a good time, now. I know we will. 1190 01:15:05,033 --> 01:15:06,728 Bye-bye. 1191 01:15:07,233 --> 01:15:11,397 We going to have a good time. He's a nice little boy too. Yes, indeedy. 1192 01:15:11,566 --> 01:15:14,501 He's a cute little boy too. Look at the little baby. 1193 01:15:14,666 --> 01:15:18,397 Yeah, he's a good little boy. One, two, three. 1194 01:15:20,600 --> 01:15:22,932 Now, you come clean, you little punk. Who are you? 1195 01:15:23,100 --> 01:15:25,830 Where you from? What you all about? What is all this? 1196 01:15:29,399 --> 01:15:32,392 Look here, old man. You been a real pain in my butt. 1197 01:15:32,566 --> 01:15:34,932 And you're right, I did rob that jewelry store. 1198 01:15:35,100 --> 01:15:38,069 And now there's some real bad people after me. 1199 01:15:38,233 --> 01:15:40,394 And the people you love are gonna get hurt... 1200 01:15:40,566 --> 01:15:42,033 ...if I don't get that diamond. 1201 01:15:42,199 --> 01:15:46,762 And I don't want that to happen, so you better just stay out of my way. 1202 01:15:52,766 --> 01:15:55,428 Hey, yo, Percy, it's me. Be here in a hour. 1203 01:15:55,600 --> 01:15:58,228 - I'll have the diamond then. - How can you do this to us? 1204 01:15:58,833 --> 01:16:00,994 We took you in, thought you were a child in need. 1205 01:16:01,166 --> 01:16:04,727 - You turn out to be a lowlife thief. - Look, I didn't mean for it to go this far. 1206 01:16:04,899 --> 01:16:06,993 I was iust trying to get my diamond and be out. 1207 01:16:07,166 --> 01:16:11,227 - You ain't getting away with it. - Then it's time to dance. Come on. 1208 01:16:12,466 --> 01:16:14,229 - Baby, I- - Sweetheart... 1209 01:16:14,399 --> 01:16:16,425 ...this means so much to me. 1210 01:16:16,600 --> 01:16:18,693 I know it's not real. Look at the size of this. 1211 01:16:18,866 --> 01:16:20,857 There's no way you could afford that, but... 1212 01:16:21,066 --> 01:16:25,560 Well, it's what the ring symbolizes that makes it so special to me. 1213 01:16:25,733 --> 01:16:28,395 - Yeah, about that, baby. I didn't- - Please. Let me finish. 1214 01:16:28,566 --> 01:16:32,730 Please. I know that you are not the one who isn't ready. It's me. 1215 01:16:32,899 --> 01:16:35,494 I have always needed for everything to fit my schedule. 1216 01:16:35,666 --> 01:16:39,033 And you have shown me that sometimes life doesn't work that way. 1217 01:16:39,199 --> 01:16:43,068 It's unpredictable, and sometimes you have to go with the flow and... 1218 01:16:43,233 --> 01:16:45,224 I'll never be ready until it just happens. 1219 01:16:45,399 --> 01:16:48,699 - Vanessa, I iust wanna tell you- - I think that we should just do it. 1220 01:16:49,733 --> 01:16:51,360 Do what? 1221 01:16:51,600 --> 01:16:52,897 Let's adopt him. 1222 01:16:53,066 --> 01:16:55,557 Tomorrow let's take the baby to Child Services... 1223 01:16:55,733 --> 01:16:57,030 ...and start the paperwork. 1224 01:16:57,199 --> 01:16:58,758 You mean we can keep him? 1225 01:16:58,933 --> 01:17:00,833 - Yeah. - Yes. 1226 01:17:02,100 --> 01:17:04,034 So, what did you wanna tell me? 1227 01:17:06,333 --> 01:17:07,322 Nothing. 1228 01:17:07,500 --> 01:17:09,331 Nothing at all. Let's- Let's toast. 1229 01:17:09,833 --> 01:17:11,460 Okay. 1230 01:17:15,000 --> 01:17:16,729 You don't mess with a man from Detroit. 1231 01:17:16,899 --> 01:17:18,060 I'm from Detroit. 1232 01:17:18,233 --> 01:17:20,428 The hell you doing? 1233 01:17:20,600 --> 01:17:22,500 - What's going on? - Daddy, get off of him. 1234 01:17:22,666 --> 01:17:24,691 - Get off of the baby. - Stop it. 1235 01:17:24,866 --> 01:17:26,356 Ain't no baby. That's a criminal. 1236 01:17:26,533 --> 01:17:29,696 I have had it with you. I'm calling Whispering Glen. 1237 01:17:29,866 --> 01:17:31,128 Vanessa, I ain't crazy. 1238 01:17:31,300 --> 01:17:34,030 You see, I know what is and I know what ain't is. 1239 01:17:34,199 --> 01:17:36,361 And he ain't is what he say he is. 1240 01:17:36,533 --> 01:17:38,728 You see, "is" is and "ain'ts" ain't. 1241 01:17:39,166 --> 01:17:40,861 Check the teddy bear. The teddy bear. 1242 01:17:41,033 --> 01:17:42,500 Teddy bear knows. 1243 01:17:42,666 --> 01:17:45,362 - Come on, then. Please. - We'll take good care of your father. 1244 01:17:45,533 --> 01:17:47,592 Whispering Glen is a safe facility. 1245 01:17:47,766 --> 01:17:49,825 Give him a couple of days to adjust... 1246 01:17:50,000 --> 01:17:52,332 - Let me go. - ... and then come visit. 1247 01:18:00,399 --> 01:18:04,427 Vanessa, believe me. "Is" is, "ain'ts" ain't. 1248 01:18:04,600 --> 01:18:06,568 Use the Taser if you have to. 1249 01:18:06,733 --> 01:18:08,200 Check the teddy bear. 1250 01:18:08,366 --> 01:18:09,856 The teddy bear. 1251 01:18:12,033 --> 01:18:13,898 I'm gonna go put him to bed. 1252 01:18:14,500 --> 01:18:16,024 Yeah. 1253 01:18:24,500 --> 01:18:25,489 Man. 1254 01:18:26,500 --> 01:18:29,867 How does one child turn a household upside down in a weekend? 1255 01:18:30,266 --> 01:18:33,326 Look at this place. It's a mess. 1256 01:18:48,399 --> 01:18:50,265 Check the teddy bear. The teddy bear. 1257 01:18:50,433 --> 01:18:51,957 Teddy bear knows. 1258 01:18:54,333 --> 01:18:55,891 Grandpa bad. 1259 01:18:56,066 --> 01:18:58,694 No. No, baby. No, no, no. 1260 01:18:58,866 --> 01:19:01,357 Papa's not bad. He didn't mean to hurt you. He just- 1261 01:19:02,100 --> 01:19:05,194 He's a little... Yeah. 1262 01:19:32,199 --> 01:19:34,896 Wow, look here, old man. You've been a real pain in the butt. 1263 01:19:35,600 --> 01:19:37,830 And you're right, I did rob that jewelry store. 1264 01:19:38,000 --> 01:19:40,594 And now there's a lot of bad people a_er me. 1265 01:19:40,766 --> 01:19:42,358 People you love are gonna get hurt... 1266 01:19:42,533 --> 01:19:44,091 ...if I don't get the diamond back. 1267 01:19:44,266 --> 01:19:45,528 Vanessa. 1268 01:19:45,699 --> 01:19:46,860 Vanessa. 1269 01:19:47,566 --> 01:19:50,126 - Where's Calvin? - I put him in the cr- 1270 01:19:50,300 --> 01:19:52,530 - Where's the diamond? - It was- 1271 01:19:53,366 --> 01:19:55,561 - Gone. - Damn. Pops was right. 1272 01:19:55,733 --> 01:19:58,600 - I'm calling the police. - I'm gonna get my dad. 1273 01:20:00,300 --> 01:20:01,426 Dad! 1274 01:20:01,600 --> 01:20:03,966 Yes, I have some information on a stolen diamond. 1275 01:20:04,766 --> 01:20:06,290 That's what I'm talking about. 1276 01:20:06,466 --> 01:20:08,297 We did it. We rich, baby. 1277 01:20:10,199 --> 01:20:13,397 - Yes. Just in the nick of time. - We blinging. 1278 01:20:13,566 --> 01:20:15,534 Walken and his goons is going to that house. 1279 01:20:15,933 --> 01:20:17,161 - What? - Don't worry. 1280 01:20:17,333 --> 01:20:19,301 He thinks Darryl's my partner. 1281 01:20:19,466 --> 01:20:22,367 You idiot. Walken will kill him if he don't have his diamond. 1282 01:20:22,533 --> 01:20:25,764 Exactly. Which means he won't be coming after you. 1283 01:20:25,933 --> 01:20:29,369 It's perfect. We get away scot-free. 1284 01:20:31,566 --> 01:20:33,124 This is the time you hit me, right? 1285 01:20:36,466 --> 01:20:37,990 Let me pull over. 1286 01:20:41,000 --> 01:20:44,299 Don't start beating me like I'm a R & B singer, man. 1287 01:20:45,933 --> 01:20:49,027 Police is here. Hey. 1288 01:20:50,166 --> 01:20:52,191 Hey. Can I help you? 1289 01:20:52,366 --> 01:20:54,334 Is this the guy that double-crossed Percy? 1290 01:20:54,500 --> 01:20:55,728 Yeah, that's the guy, boss. 1291 01:20:55,899 --> 01:20:59,097 I don't know anybody named Percy. You must got the wrong guy. 1292 01:20:59,399 --> 01:21:01,868 - Cut the crap. I want my diamond. - I don't have it. 1293 01:21:02,033 --> 01:21:04,661 Too bad. I guess we're gonna have to beat it out of you. 1294 01:21:04,833 --> 01:21:07,563 I iust called the police. And they're on their way over here. 1295 01:21:07,933 --> 01:21:10,197 Really? That doesn't leave us much time then. 1296 01:21:11,366 --> 01:21:14,028 - Take him. - Wait, wait, wait. Wait, guys. 1297 01:21:15,666 --> 01:21:16,826 Dada? 1298 01:21:19,600 --> 01:21:21,227 Dada. 1299 01:21:22,133 --> 01:21:23,191 Who's this little guy? 1300 01:21:24,500 --> 01:21:26,058 That's my son. 1301 01:21:28,699 --> 01:21:29,724 Take him upstairs. 1302 01:21:31,666 --> 01:21:34,100 - I wanna talk to you. - Cute kid. 1303 01:21:34,266 --> 01:21:36,894 It's- Just- I don't have- Listen. That's my nipple. 1304 01:21:41,899 --> 01:21:43,026 Time to take a nap. 1305 01:21:43,199 --> 01:21:44,792 Night-night? 1306 01:21:44,966 --> 01:21:47,901 And don't worry about any loud noises you may hear downstairs. 1307 01:21:48,066 --> 01:21:50,330 It's iust us beating up your daddy. 1308 01:21:52,500 --> 01:21:54,092 Here you are. 1309 01:21:57,233 --> 01:21:59,394 Nighty-night. 1310 01:22:35,566 --> 01:22:36,897 Click. 1311 01:22:42,199 --> 01:22:44,760 Now tell me, where's my diamond? 1312 01:22:44,933 --> 01:22:46,230 I told you, I don't have it. 1313 01:22:46,399 --> 01:22:48,334 You don't tell me where my diamond is... 1314 01:22:48,500 --> 01:22:52,129 ...that cute little baby of yours is gonna get hurt. 1315 01:22:58,533 --> 01:23:01,093 Moron, get the kid. Get the kid. 1316 01:23:02,800 --> 01:23:04,028 I want him. 1317 01:23:09,833 --> 01:23:11,300 There you are, little buddy. 1318 01:23:12,566 --> 01:23:13,965 Come on. 1319 01:23:14,133 --> 01:23:15,464 Come to Uncle Rosco. 1320 01:23:24,399 --> 01:23:26,027 Okay. Play nicey-nicey. 1321 01:23:55,866 --> 01:23:57,731 Okay, get your ass up. 1322 01:23:57,899 --> 01:24:00,869 Yeah, get up. I got you now. 1323 01:24:01,033 --> 01:24:02,557 Yeah. Yeah. 1324 01:24:03,399 --> 01:24:04,662 Ain't so tough now, are you? 1325 01:24:09,166 --> 01:24:10,827 Back up. Or I'll shoot you. 1326 01:24:11,233 --> 01:24:13,098 Shoot me, tough guy. Come on. 1327 01:24:15,766 --> 01:24:16,926 Oh, boy. 1328 01:24:17,100 --> 01:24:18,499 I'm surrounded by morons. 1329 01:24:19,000 --> 01:24:20,865 Here. You dropped your gun, sir. 1330 01:24:21,033 --> 01:24:23,501 Here you go. It's all yours. 1331 01:24:23,666 --> 01:24:25,531 - What are you gonna do? - Wait, wait, I- 1332 01:24:25,699 --> 01:24:28,464 Come on, get out of here. Come on. 1333 01:24:32,899 --> 01:24:33,924 All right, dude. 1334 01:24:34,100 --> 01:24:38,560 You busted my Sergio da Vincis, $62.50 designer frames. 1335 01:24:38,733 --> 01:24:41,725 Not cool. Not cool. 1336 01:24:42,233 --> 01:24:43,427 Okay, buddy. 1337 01:24:43,600 --> 01:24:46,000 We can either do this the easy way or the hard way. 1338 01:24:46,833 --> 01:24:50,269 I think I like it the hard way. 1339 01:24:59,666 --> 01:25:01,156 Did we get him? 1340 01:25:01,866 --> 01:25:03,094 He's yours, man. 1341 01:25:11,366 --> 01:25:12,355 Dude... 1342 01:25:13,566 --> 01:25:15,431 ...you iust woke the dragon up. 1343 01:25:15,600 --> 01:25:17,261 Prepare for pain. 1344 01:25:17,433 --> 01:25:20,231 It's time for the dragon to go back to sleep. 1345 01:25:32,233 --> 01:25:34,030 What are you doing? 1346 01:25:36,366 --> 01:25:39,267 - Stop. - You going down, Sasquatch. 1347 01:25:39,433 --> 01:25:41,230 Better not. 1348 01:26:00,766 --> 01:26:02,290 What the hell is going on here? 1349 01:26:02,466 --> 01:26:03,990 That ain't no baby. 1350 01:26:04,166 --> 01:26:05,360 - Who else is here? - Nobody. 1351 01:26:05,533 --> 01:26:07,899 - Who's here? - Nobody, I swear. 1352 01:26:08,066 --> 01:26:09,658 Come on. 1353 01:26:09,833 --> 01:26:12,165 Inside. Inside. 1354 01:26:13,399 --> 01:26:14,628 There's the little monster. 1355 01:26:15,233 --> 01:26:17,201 Listen, what does he got there? 1356 01:26:17,566 --> 01:26:20,057 - It's an airplane. - Tell him to get rid of the plane. 1357 01:26:21,399 --> 01:26:22,458 Get rid of it. 1358 01:26:23,733 --> 01:26:25,997 Calvin, throw the plane. 1359 01:26:36,100 --> 01:26:37,089 What are you doing? 1360 01:26:43,399 --> 01:26:45,027 Don't move. 1361 01:26:46,300 --> 01:26:47,961 Save it, tough guy. 1362 01:26:48,133 --> 01:26:50,260 You're not gonna shoot me. 1363 01:26:50,833 --> 01:26:52,061 But I will. 1364 01:26:53,899 --> 01:26:55,026 Freeze! Police! 1365 01:26:55,199 --> 01:26:56,633 Freeze! Police! 1366 01:26:56,800 --> 01:26:58,791 I got this. You check the house. 1367 01:26:59,933 --> 01:27:02,868 Black cops, come with me. White lady, you stay here. 1368 01:27:03,066 --> 01:27:05,091 I'm telling you, guys, that ain't no baby. 1369 01:27:05,266 --> 01:27:07,496 He's the mastermind behind the whole thing. 1370 01:27:07,666 --> 01:27:09,190 Get him out of here. 1371 01:27:09,366 --> 01:27:11,926 He's a stone-cold killer, that kid. 1372 01:27:13,333 --> 01:27:14,823 Would you get this thing off me? 1373 01:27:15,000 --> 01:27:18,401 Relax. Where you're going, you might want to keep that on. 1374 01:27:18,966 --> 01:27:20,729 I don't wanna go to iail. 1375 01:27:20,899 --> 01:27:22,993 It's too dark. There's no TV. 1376 01:27:27,966 --> 01:27:29,661 Hey, where you going, little guy? 1377 01:27:33,100 --> 01:27:34,897 Ain't this your kid? 1378 01:27:35,066 --> 01:27:36,090 Dada? 1379 01:27:37,600 --> 01:27:39,833 Yeah, that's my son. 1380 01:27:39,833 --> 01:27:41,528 Now, Calvin... 1381 01:27:41,666 --> 01:27:43,930 ...don't you have something for the nice policeman? 1382 01:27:45,566 --> 01:27:47,431 - No. - Come on. 1383 01:27:47,600 --> 01:27:50,535 You don't wanna go to prison with the rest of the bad men, do you? 1384 01:27:56,266 --> 01:27:57,358 There we go. 1385 01:27:57,533 --> 01:27:59,592 Hey, the diamond. 1386 01:27:59,766 --> 01:28:02,530 Thanks, kid. Now your dad's gonna get a big reward. 1387 01:28:02,699 --> 01:28:05,032 - A reward? - Yeah, the insurance company... 1388 01:28:05,199 --> 01:28:07,896 ...offered $ 1 OO,OOO to whoever found the diamond. 1389 01:28:08,066 --> 01:28:09,658 A hundred thousand dollars? 1390 01:28:10,266 --> 01:28:11,733 God, that's gonna come in handy. 1391 01:28:11,899 --> 01:28:13,424 Shoot, I could get my car fixed... 1392 01:28:13,600 --> 01:28:15,329 ...get a new wedding ring for my wife... 1393 01:28:15,500 --> 01:28:18,833 ...I could take a vacation, buy a TV set- 1394 01:28:19,300 --> 01:28:21,200 And if there's any change left over... 1395 01:28:21,366 --> 01:28:24,267 ...I'll give a little something to my son. 1396 01:28:24,600 --> 01:28:27,262 Right. Well, we'll be in touch. 1397 01:28:37,600 --> 01:28:38,726 So... 1398 01:28:39,000 --> 01:28:41,798 Oh, come on. Let's not get all mushy about this. 1399 01:28:41,966 --> 01:28:44,935 Let's iust shake hands and part ways like men. 1400 01:28:45,100 --> 01:28:47,034 All right? No hard feelings? 1401 01:28:47,433 --> 01:28:49,833 - Nah, no hard feelings. - All right. 1402 01:28:50,000 --> 01:28:52,867 Besides, it was kind of cool having a son for a minute. 1403 01:28:53,033 --> 01:28:56,025 See? There you go with all that sentimental stuff. 1404 01:28:56,899 --> 01:28:58,492 If that's the game you wanna play... 1405 01:28:58,666 --> 01:29:01,567 ...I guess it was cool having you as a fa- 1406 01:29:01,966 --> 01:29:03,126 Oh, boy. 1407 01:29:03,300 --> 01:29:07,361 What I'm trying to say is, I've never really had a daddy. 1408 01:29:08,166 --> 01:29:09,463 I guess what I'm saying is... 1409 01:29:09,633 --> 01:29:11,794 ...you're gonna make a great father, all right? 1410 01:29:11,966 --> 01:29:13,695 There, I said it. Are you happy now? 1411 01:29:15,133 --> 01:29:16,964 Now, I'm gonna walk out that back door... 1412 01:29:17,133 --> 01:29:20,899 ...and you ain't gonna see me no more. Ever. 1413 01:29:21,899 --> 01:29:23,663 - But- - Oh, it hurts. 1414 01:29:23,833 --> 01:29:25,664 - We- - I know. 1415 01:29:25,833 --> 01:29:27,323 We'll never see each other again. 1416 01:29:27,500 --> 01:29:29,798 - But we- - Maybe that's for the best. 1417 01:29:29,966 --> 01:29:31,126 You'll start a family... 1418 01:29:31,300 --> 01:29:34,201 ...and you won't need a lowlife criminal like... 1419 01:29:34,366 --> 01:29:36,197 ...Calvin Sims around anymore. 1420 01:29:36,366 --> 01:29:39,893 Actually what I was gonna say is, we don't have a back door. 1421 01:29:40,066 --> 01:29:42,398 Okay, well, then I'll go out the front. 1422 01:29:43,300 --> 01:29:45,825 - Fine. - Well... 1423 01:29:46,433 --> 01:29:50,836 I'll be out of your lives for good, never to return again. 1424 01:29:51,399 --> 01:29:52,992 Cool. 1425 01:29:56,600 --> 01:29:57,999 So long. 1426 01:29:58,166 --> 01:30:01,693 Farewell. Oh, God. 1427 01:30:04,766 --> 01:30:08,099 Aren't you gonna miss me? Just a little bit? 1428 01:30:08,266 --> 01:30:11,758 - See you around, buddy. - No? 1429 01:30:12,333 --> 01:30:13,527 Take care. 1430 01:30:14,033 --> 01:30:15,660 Goodbye. 1431 01:30:15,833 --> 01:30:21,032 It's so hard to say goodbye 1432 01:30:35,366 --> 01:30:37,493 Why? 1433 01:30:38,300 --> 01:30:42,396 Nobody loves Calvin. 1434 01:30:42,566 --> 01:30:44,557 Because I'm short. 1435 01:30:45,566 --> 01:30:48,660 - They think I'm ugly. - Hey, little man. 1436 01:30:49,566 --> 01:30:51,261 Wanna share a glass of milk? 1437 01:31:01,233 --> 01:31:04,031 Enough of all this girlie stuff. This ain't Brokeback Mountain. 1438 01:31:05,166 --> 01:31:07,726 Hey, how about we put a little bit of liquor in that milk? 1439 01:31:07,899 --> 01:31:09,697 Forget that. Let's go to a bar. 1440 01:31:09,866 --> 01:31:11,026 All right. Bet. 1441 01:31:11,199 --> 01:31:13,691 - Are you over 21? - And then some. 1442 01:31:13,899 --> 01:31:15,424 All right. 1443 01:31:17,666 --> 01:31:19,793 Hey, I know this great strip club. 1444 01:31:20,233 --> 01:31:22,167 Don't say that loud. My wife might get mad. 1445 01:31:22,333 --> 01:31:24,096 - Oh, sorry. - Got change of a hundred? 1446 01:31:24,266 --> 01:31:26,564 - No, we steal it from Pops. - All right. All singles. 1447 01:31:40,000 --> 01:31:42,730 You a cute little fellow. Yes, you are. 1448 01:31:42,899 --> 01:31:45,664 Take after your mama. You got a lot of grandpoppy in you too. 1449 01:31:45,833 --> 01:31:50,065 Yes, you do, little boy. Look at the little boy. 1450 01:31:50,500 --> 01:31:52,229 Where's the bottle? The kid is starving. 1451 01:31:52,399 --> 01:31:54,732 I'm coming. I'm coming. Old grouch. 1452 01:31:55,466 --> 01:31:56,763 Here he comes, little boy. 1453 01:31:56,933 --> 01:32:01,461 Don't worry. We gonna get you some milk. Yeah. 1454 01:32:01,833 --> 01:32:04,063 That little guy's so cute... 1455 01:32:04,233 --> 01:32:06,428 ...it's making me go soft. 1456 01:32:06,600 --> 01:32:08,932 He look iust like his daddy. 1457 01:32:11,500 --> 01:32:13,991 Howdy-do, little boy. 1458 01:39:00,283 --> 01:39:01,409 So... 1459 01:39:01,683 --> 01:39:04,481 Oh, come on. Let's not get all mushy about this. 1460 01:39:04,650 --> 01:39:07,619 Let's iust shake hands and part ways like men. 1461 01:39:07,783 --> 01:39:09,717 All right? No hard feelings? 1462 01:39:34,650 --> 01:39:36,379 There, I said it. Are you happy now? 1463 01:39:37,816 --> 01:39:39,647 Now, I'm gonna walk out that back door... 1464 01:39:39,816 --> 01:39:43,582 ...and you ain't gonna see me no more. Ever.